Worthy of Love
by Marrabelle
Summary: Amanda has a sordid past, no living relatives, & a debt she owes to Dr Cullen. Secrets unravel & she's forced to accept him & his unique family into her life whether she likes him or not! *Theme: Neglect, comfort, family, & love* CXEs,AXJ,RXE & 2OC's *AU*
1. Fresh Start

**Disclaimer for the Entire Story: **

I don't own Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, Breaking Dawn, or Midnight Sun. I do not own any of Stephanie Meyer's characters. She is a genius. All hail Stephanie for creating this vampire world!

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_***Notes: **_

_-This story starts out as a Carlisle and OC fic, but later on Esme and the rest of the Cullen kids have major supporting roles. This story is not a CarlisleXEsme love story (although they love each other, of course)...the story is categorized under both their names because they play very big roles!!! So if you are a fan of either character you may like this story. It is a Cullen family story...not a love story about Carlisle and Esme or Carlisle and an OC. :) Just to set things straight since there was confusion in the past._

_-Amanda (Mandi) is my character. She will be introduced in chapter 2 in a lot more depth. Amanda is human...no vampire in her, no werewolf, no witch, no superpowers...just a fragile, broken human girl. Do I sound cheesy or what? Hah! :P _

_-There is also plenty of Alice, Rosalie, Emmet, and Jasper! The Cullen kids are younger teens, but the same personalities for the most part. _

_-No Edward or Bella for a change! Don't let this deter you. And I am not a BellaxEdward hater, I just felt like having a story that didn't focus on them for a change. :D_

_-The Volturi do not have a major role in this story. They do come up a few times, but just briefly to explain a few things._

_-Medical drama sure to occur. __**I love Dr Cullen!**_

_-Chapter 1 is mainly set up. It is good to read to familiarize yourself with the changes made in the Cullen family. There are not many changes, but a few that are vital. Please give the story a chance to get started. It gets better in Chapter 2 and 3 when things all fall into place. :) I promise. I am not one to just jump into the story without the background details. :)_

_-Oh, and yes, I always spell Emmet with one 't'. No need to correct me on that one! :) But if you have a constructive comment on other spelling, grammar, typo errors please let me know what it is, where the mistake takes place, and what I should do to fix it. I try my best, but I am not perfect and I make mistakes. :)_

_-I draw characters, so if you are interested in checking out some of the 'Worthy of Love' drawings, the links to them are on my profile!_

_Thank you.__ Please remember to review__ if you continue on with this story. I really do appreciate hearing from readers and I answer every review by PM. :) I hope you like the story!_

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**List of Cullen Characters and their ages:**

_(*I changed the years and order of their deaths slightly)_

Carlisle Cullen- In character.

Fixed age: 23 Vampire age: 365 (Born in 1640, changed in 1663)

X

Esme Cullen - Slightly OOC

Fixed age: 26 Vampire age: 60 (Born in 1945, changed in 1971)

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Rosalie Cullen- In character.

Fixed age: 16 Vampire age: 99 (Born in 1906, changed in 1922)

X

Emmet Cullen -In character.

Fixed age: 17 Vampire age: 99 (Born in 1905, changed in 1923)

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Alice Cullen - In character.

Fixed age: 14 Vampire age: 104 (Born in 1901, changed in 1915)

X

Jasper Cullen - Slightly OOC

Fixed age: 16 Vampire age: 158 (Born in 1847, changed in 1863)

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_**PART ONE:**_

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**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter One**

|Fresh Start|

September, 2005

The sun was setting over the green mountains overlooking the quaint town of Kipta. The town was North of Vancouver, British Columbia and East of Juno, Alaska. It was one of the most cloudy, windy, rainy, damp places on the Western side of North America. It was in close proximity to vast amounts of wildlife and the small town of approximately three thousand residents was the perfect place for six vegetarian vampires to set up home for a decade.

The residents of Kipta had no idea the Cullen Family were vampires. They were only elated to have a big time surgeon, such as Dr Carlisle Cullen, joining their community.

The town had one medical building. It once employed several medical professionals and small staff, but it had been left vacant. This was because of the small size of the town and the distance to any major city. Town Doctor didn't hold appeal to many physicians and their families because the town was in the boonies of the Canadian North and weather was only one of the conundrums.

There was no room for growth for a young physician in this miniscule town. However, Dr Cullen didn't feel lack of pride in serving a small community. He felt they needed the care more than a metropolitan area would. The residents of Kipta had more than a two-hour drive to make it to a hospital and only two ambulances assigned to make the trip if an emergency arose. The number of home births in Kipta was high!

The late Dr Cassidy had been the town's main physician for the past forty years. After his death, the medical building on Main Street had seen dozens of young doctors come and go. None of them had enough experience to run a practice on their own. What the town needed was a qualified, ambitious, experienced doctor. Enter Dr Carlisle Cullen.

Although, Dr Carlisle Cullen did not appear to be experienced, for he was permanently set in his early twenties, he would be the most highly trained and well-practiced medical professional that a human could ever meet in their lifetime. They would need to give him a chance to prove himself, but in short time they would come to trust and honor him. As was the tradition in the towns the Cullen family moved to in previous decades.

Carlisle was the family's rock. He was the original Cullen. This was the family he had started in 1922.

First, Carlisle discovered Rosalie, beaten beyond repair and changed her to be a friend and companion to himself. He had felt she was too much beauty for the world to lose. A romantic relationship never grew between the pair of them, though they would have made a beautiful couple. Rosalie was too young, only sixteen, and became more of a daughter than anything else to Carlisle.

A few years after that, Rosalie saved Emmet from a bear attack. She carried him for many miles to bring him to Carlisle to make the transformation complete. Something about Emmet's childish, dimpled face reminded her of the life she had once dreamed of having, a child of her own, but she took him as a husband knowing she would never be able to have children. Rosalie credits Emmet as being her saving grace.

Alice and Jasper joined the Cullen family in the middle of the twentieth Century. Alice had no recollection of her human life, but she woke alone and had a vision that encouraged her to follow the same diet as Carlisle chose to abide by. She knew she would find him one day and that she would be a part of his family. It only took her a few years to find Carlisle and Rosalie. She also found along her journey, her husband, Jasper.

Like, Alice, who could see the future, Jasper had an enhanced talent from his former human life as well. He had been overtly charismatic when he was a young confederate in the South. He was very aware of people's feelings as he was of his own. Now, as a vampire he could pick up on the emotions of others and was also able to manipulate those emotions. He used his skill in times of stress.

The last addition to the family was Esme. Carlisle found Esme nearly dead in a morgue and knew she was his soul mate. They had met years early when she was a young teen and he remembered her. She had broken her leg that first meeting and he had been her doctor. They had felt a connection to one another even back then, but it wasn't until he found her in the morgue that fateful day in 1971 that he decided he should change her and make her his wife.

She had jumped off a cliff after the loss of her only child, a young girl. She was innately maternal and was satisfied to act as mother to all the vampires they accepted into their lives. That was her gift to the Cullen family. Her love. It was everlasting and unconditional. The day that Esme became a Cullen was the day they all became a family.

The family of six was large for a coven. There was only one larger in the world that was known. And they were more of a corporation rather than a family.

The Volturi was a coven residing in Europe that governed the vampire world. They were in charge of the vampire law. There was one main rule that all vampires, vegetarian or not, had to abide by: The existence of Vampires must remain secret to Humans. However, Carlisle had spent some time with the famous coven years ago and was in very good standing with the leader, Aro. If any exceptions to the rules were to be made, they would for the benevolent doctor and his peace-loving family.

Of course, keeping their identity hidden from human had never been an issue for the Cullens. They took precautions to appear as human as possible. They went to work and school and followed the routine schedules that adhered them to the town they resided. It never took long for them to become lawful citizens of their new home. It was rare that they were suspected of anything but being too perfect. Elitists, some would call the Cullen's for the way they dressed in designer cloths and drove expensive vehicles and kept a low profile in social settings, but that was nothing compared to the truth so the Cullens let people believe what they wanted to believe.

Little did they know, that moving to Kipta would have them faced with a major decision; was following the vampire law was really the best for their family? Only time would tell. Carlisle Cullen might, one day, be forced to pull for that favor from his old friend, Aro.

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"MOM!" Amanda called out. She had chased her mother into the dense forest, but each time she got near the graceful figure ahead of her she would lose sight of it again. The woods were unfamiliar to her now. Darker somehow. It was not the same trails she was used to. A completely different area than she was familiar with.

Amanda had been trying to find her mother for hours, but each time she got close enough to view the woman dressed in a white silk dress down to her knees, she would lose her again. Amanda grew weary and tired. She could hardly keep her eyelids open.

She was crying now. Tears of sadness and tears of frustration rolled down her cheeks and hit the ground below her.

"Why won't you stay with me?" Amanda pleaded out loud, hoping this time she would receive an answer.

Silence.

Amanda sank to the forest floor and beat on the soft earth with her hands. This was not the first time this had happened. Her mother had run away before. Amanda didn't know why her mother didn't want her. She didn't want to be left alone. It was too frightening to be alone in the world. Her mother was all she had.

"MOM!" she screamed again. Her voice echoed briefly off the trees. She was staring down at her hands clenching the dark soil beneath her when feet stepped up beside her knee. Amanda grazed the figure beside her, moving her eyes up from her mother's legs, to her waist, then her shoulder blade. When Amanda finally looked high enough to see her mother's face it was too bright. The sun was shining so harshly right above her mother that she could hardly see.

Amanda squinted and tilted her head. The face staring down at her was too beautiful to be her mother. It looked like her mother, but she was not the same somehow. Her mother had never looked at her with so much love before either. This was an angel.

Amanda 's mother was dead.

She began to cry as the woman in white faded away into the dense woods again. Amanda was too tired to follow her anymore. She sank down and hugged her knees. The pain seemed to fade as her eyes closed out the forest surrounding her....

Only to wake with a new pain. The realization that her mother really was gone forever and that she was back on the floor of her bedroom, clinging to herself with all her might, tear streaks still fresh on her fragile face.

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Nestled in the dense forest on the outskirts of the town, was a gloriously built home. It had been the project of Esme Cullen, Carlisle's beloved wife. She was the homemaker. She took great joy in making their family feel comfortable and loved. All of the members of the Cullen family respected her greatly and thought of her as a mother.

After the family unloaded the truckloads of furniture, home appliances, clothing and other essentials from the moving vans they had rented they all sat down as a family at the magnificent dining room table. It was a masterpiece. Hand crafted by a famous designer to Esme's exact specifications, it was the centerpiece of the high ceilinged dining room. Esme liked modern home furnishings with a touch of traditional antiques to give the home a more nostalgic feel. The most important piece was a cross that hung between the pointed, high ceiling and the top of the doorframe. It had belonged to Carlisle's father.

"I call this meeting to order!" Emmet said boisterously. He put his fist down hard on the table. Esme's mouth hung open and her brow frowned. Only for a moment, though. She saw there was no damage to her one-of-a-kind, handcrafted, marble table and her soft, loving smile returned.

"Emmet, you big dope! Dad is not here yet," Alice pointed out and then the pair of them made similar mocking faces at one another in teasing.

"Well, where is he? This meeting was his idea in the first place!" Rosalie, named the most stunning person in the world by anyone who came in visual contact with her, said with an icy tone.

"He can't help it, Rose. He had to go down to his new office to set up. It was left in disarray by the previous tenants," Alice defended Carlisle's tardiness. The exceptionally tiny vampire had taken a special liking to Carlisle. Ever since the day she predicted she would be apart of the Cullen family and he welcomed her as a daughter with more compassion than she had ever felt.

"He is planning on being here soon, though? Right?" the largest of the Cullens questioned with an ulterior motive. Emmet was tall, dark haired, with dimples, but had the strong, muscular body of a star football player. He was the strongest physically of the Cullens. In spite of his frightening size, he was playful and lighthearted.

"Oh, just relax. You can watch the game later. The TiVo will record it," Rosalie, Emmet's mate, told him.

"I am sorry I kept you all waiting," Carlisle calmly stated as he entered the room. He made his way to the head of the table and took his seat. Everyone settled down and waited for him to speak. He explained why he had been late home from the office. "I had quite a lot of onlookers and I had to move a bit slower than I had planned. And I received a call answering my posting for an assistant,"

"Can we get on with this?" Rosalie huffed, cutting into Carlisle's explanation. She was impatient when it came to moving to a new home. She didn't like to start over. She wanted to be as human as she was able. She carefully examined her delicate alabaster hands and smiled at their beauty. She wore only the finest jewels on her slender fingers and her immaculate nails were painted and tipped elegantly. If she liked one thing about vampire immortality it was the eternal beauty that accompanied. Rosalie was vain. If she had any trait intensified from her former life, it was her vanity. And her pride.

"Lighten up, Rose," Alice chirped. She looked to Carlisle with her large eyes smiling in anticipation. Alice loved family meetings. Anything to do with family or pretending or relating to being human made her bounce up and down with glee. She sat on her chair, antsy like a child who was anxious for some big surprise.

"Of course we all know the routine. This is not our first time starting over in a new town," Carlisle began in his gentle tone. His wife, Esme, warming stroked his hand in hers as she sat beside him at the table. "So far I have been met with nothing but kindness and curiosity,"

"And a bit of mild flirting from the ladies," Alice giggled. She had no doubt seen that coming. She had the unique ability to see the future. Esme's loving smiled grew and instead of jealousy she beamed pride as she looked to her husband. Carlisle was a gorgeous man. His light golden hair waved and smoothly combed back. His kind eyes sparkled the gentlest soft honey color. He had never tasted human blood. His eyes had not shone red since his change over three and a half centuries ago.

"Yes, well…" Carlisle dismissed Alice's side note and moved on, "I am all set up to see patients. I will be starting tomorrow,"

"That is wonderful, dear," Esme showed her support.

"You will be well received. There will be some hesitation at first, but people will come around," Alice predicted, "I see no suspicions arising thus far,"

"Thank you, Alice," Carlisle nodded to his petite daughter. She grinned happily for his approval. She was so tiny she knelt on her chair to gain height.

"You are all enrolled in school starting Monday," Carlisle continued.

"Oh joy," Rosalie muttered unhappily. Jasper looked pained at the thought too. Emmet was indifferent. He would go along with anything. He was just happy to be himself. Alice was smiling like an enthusiastic pupil.

"Alice and Jasper are starting as freshmen, Rose and Emmet are sophomores," Carlisle reminded. That was usually how they began. Alice liked going to school so she didn't mind starting out younger and having to spend more time in the institute. She could have passed as younger than freshman, but Jasper could not. He was quite tall and mature for his fixed age of 16. Alice and Jasper liked to stick together in grade so they would graduate at the same time. They were mates like Emmet and Rosalie were, even though they all lived as siblings under Dr and Mrs Cullen's care.

"We will be welcomed. No one will give us a hard time," Alice tried to give some positive cheer to the dull crowd.

"Ya…but we will never really fit in!" Rosalie snapped and she looked to her manicured hands again and studied them to make sure they were perfect in keeping with the rest of her flawless body. She never tired of her own beauty. Her blonde hair was a shade lighter than Carlisle's and it seemed to glisten as it waved thickly halfway down her back in loose curls. Her lips pouted out naturally and her eyes were perfectly symmetrical with her oval face. No one could deny that she was beautiful in the extreme. Her body was designed for clothing. She had curves in all the right places and any girl would kill to look as she did. Not too tall. Not too short. Perfect in every way. Alice's dream model.

Alice liked to play dress up with Rosalie. She saw movies of how human girls her age would act and she responded accordingly by indulging in the finest cosmetics, clothing, and shoes. It was her passion. She took great thrill in being the Cullen family's personal shopper.

"I don't need to remind you all to keep up the human act. It has been a couple months since the move and we have fallen into comfortable ways," Carlisle said calmly. He simply meant that instead of zipping around with speed and agility the family needed to slow down to blend in. Also, vampires were still creatures. They could remain stagnant for days, weeks even and find no discomfort. But to blend in they practice movements that appears involuntary to humans.

To look more human they would have to remember to fidget sometimes, pace as they stood or shift weight around, and blink when they were looking at something for a great deal of time.

"We know the drill, Pops!" Emmet lightened the mood. Carlisle smiled and nodded.

"Good. I know this is not the first time we have started over. But we want to do this right. This is a lovely town. I think we will all enjoy living here. Let's be smart and play it safe," he said. No one spoke, but everyone was in agreement.

"How does everyone like the house?" Esme said after there was a short pause, "Are you happy with your accommodations? I tried to take your personal preferences to heart,"

"It is wonderful, Mom!" Alice's voice rang out like happy church bells. Esme had made her closet a large walk-in with built in sewing room and platform that was surrounded by floor to ceiling mirrors.

"You did a marvellous job, Dear" Carlisle kissed his wife's hand tenderly.

"It is great. Where is the flat screen?" Emmet belted out. He had not discovered it yet and he felt this was the time to find out where he would be watching all his favorite sports and playing video games on. Alice giggled as Rosalie's eyes rolled.

"It is in the living room, Honey. You have to press the remote for the screen to slide open. It is hanging above the fireplace," Esme explained to her son affectionately.

"Sweet! Sixty inch?" he questioned joyously. It didn't take a lot to make him pleased.

"As you requested," she nodded at her playful son.

"Are there any questions?" Carlisle asked. He surveyed the room.

"Can we go now?" Rosalie snarked, bored from this evenings meeting already. She was also annoyed to be starting school again. The first three or four years in a new town they had more of a show to put on. She liked when her and Emmet graduated and they could move on to other things, like traveling or going to car shows. Her one other passion besides loving herself was her extensive knowledge of vehicles and their mechanics. Rosalie owned four of the Cullen's six cars. All of them were top of the line and detailed to the max.

"Yes, Rose. You may leave now," Carlisle agreed kindly. Nothing seemed to ever upset his calm stride. He was kind, compassionate and rational.

"Thanks," Rosalie muttered under her breath. She stood up. Alice quickly extended an invitation to her sister.

"Jasper and I are going hunting this evening. We think it is wise we feed before we start school. New students. New temptations. You know!? Would you and Emmet like to come along?"

"Ooo…scope out the wildlife. Sounds like fun!" Emmet thrilled, "I hope there are plenty of bears!"

"I suppose we could go along with you," Rosalie sighed.

"The more the merrier," Alice cheered. Esme smiled at her tiny, black haired daughter. Alice was a very sweet-natured vampire. She recalled none of her human life and tried her best to make each and every day of her new life count as something new and special.

"It is a good idea if you all go together. You can watch each other's backs. Learn the trails. Alice will most likely be able to see if there are humans near by so you can avoid any 'accidents'," Carlisle pointed out. Emmet made a clicking noise with his tongue and sheepishly nodded. Several decades ago he had slipped up and killed a woman when they crossed paths with each other. Her scent had been too strong for him to resist. The family had to pack up in a hurry and skip out of town without notice to avoid any questioning.

"I will be on the lookout, yes indeedy!" Alice sang and she sprang up from her seat. Jasper gracefully got up and pushed in her chair for her and then did the same with his own. Jasper had been brought into a darker side of the immortal world and had killed hundreds of humans in his past. His skin was battle ridden and scarred from fighting with other vampires. He had loathed that time in his earlier years. He was more comfortable now with the Cullens and Alice in his life. Being the second oldest vampire in the family he was also the most matured when it came to restraining his temptation to drink human blood. His control was strongest next to Carlisle's.

Jasper was quiet most of the time. He knew what the others were feeling so he was comfortable enough in his silence just reading people in his own way. He was here for Alice and that was his purpose in life. He had found hope in her and he would forever be indebted to making her happy and keeping her safe.

"Have a good time, Kids!" Esme called out lovingly after her adoptive children as they left the house and scurried out in to the dark night. She, being twenty-six when she was changed, made her the oldest Cullen physically. She was the youngest vampire of them all. She had only been a vampire since 1971. Her loving nature made her resist harming humans. She was fairly strong in will. She had only killed once when she was a newborn vampire and since then she had been able to control herself extremely well.

Of course, Carlisle was technically three hundred and sixty-five years old, but was forever fixed in the body of a twenty-three year old male. He had never tasted human blood. Not once. The thought of taking the life of a healthy human repulsed him.

Rosalie was sixteen when she was changed. She had been walking home from a Christmas party one evening and had taken the alleyway behind the local taverns. A couple of drunk mean caught up to her and brutally assaulted Rosalie and left for dead. She had never fed on a human, but she had murdered those men as her first vampire act in 1922. She had since then, been able to ward off any urges to kill another human being. However, she vowed to protect her family if a human ever threatened their existence.

Emmet was seventeen when Rosalie saved him from mortal death. It had been a year after Rosalie's. He had one slip up in his second decade as a vampire, but the scent of the woman he killed has been so strong he reacted on instinct before he could stop himself. He felt horrible about her death and worse that he had let his family down. He forgave himself and has not slipped up since.

Alice was only fourteen when she woke as a newborn vampire. She had only a bracelet with her birth date and an administration code to the hospital she had been locked up in for the majority of her human life. She didn't have memories from this time because they doctors had been giving her shock therapy in an attempt to cure her of her premonitions. She didn't know where she was from or who her family was. She didn't care to find out. They had abandoned her in that mental asylum in 1909 at the age of eight.

Jasper was sixteen in body, only. He was in actually over a century old. He had killed many humans in his first fifty years as a vampire. It was the new life he had been reborn into and he took it as the only way to survive. Until he met Alice and she told him of the Cullens and their unique family. The day he met Alice was the last day he tasted human blood. His ability to control his emotions made him adjust to the Cullen lifestyle smoothly and easily. He had amazing control of his vampire senses and used them to aid the family when he was able.

Jasper and Rosalie were both fair-haired so they pretended to be niece and nephew of Esme. While Alice and Emmet had entirely different stories to tell anyone who asked them where they came from. This made it possible for Alice to cuddle with Jasper and Emmet and Rosalie to make out in public without it being considered incest. They kept their public displays of emotion on the down low as much as possible, but they were well rehearsed with their charade as adoptive kids of Dr and Mrs Cullen.

Esme took it as her job to be their caregiver, their mother. She wouldn't have it any other way. They would forever be her teenage children in her mind.

After all the 'kids' were gone Esme stood from her place at the table to the left of Carlisle. He took a swift step closer to her and held her close to him. They eyes met briefly before she leaned into him and rest her head on his stone chest. She sighed pleasantly.

"Here we go again, love," he whispered in her ear as they embraced in perfect stillness.

Another fresh start.

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**I would LOVE it if you would kindly REVIEW!**

**Please and Thank you. :)**

_*Note:_

_I strongly encourage you to read on if you have even somewhat liked what you have read. Yes, it is an OC story with a lot of Carlisle and the other Cullens. If that is not your thing, then don't read on. However, the best is yet to come...chapter 2 and 3 really get the ball rolling in terms of where this story is headed! Please give a couple more chapters a shot before you decide if you like this story or not. :) Hey...that rhymed! :D_


	2. First Day

**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Two**

|First Day|

"Oh, come on guys! Cheer up," Alice's voice chimed as all four of the Cullen 'kids' loaded themselves into Emmet's over-sized Jeep and headed off to school. It was the first day of classes for the year and the day that the young teens of Kipta would get to meet the Cullens.

Usually the other students were too intimidated to come up to the Cullens. The odd few would attempt to introduce themselves to be polite, but the Cullens made it a mission to be as anti-social with the locals as they could so they could avoid any contact with them in the future. As a rule, they stuck to their own group.

Alice was the only one who minded this rule. She would have loved to venture out and make human friends. It was not smart in their case and she resigned passively to Jasper's side. She loved him dearly, but always longed for a best friend of the same gender. Rosalie was a sister to her, but she was not always the friend that Alice dreamed of keeping.

"I hate this part!" Rosalie moaned as they jeep roared into the tiny parking lot of Kipta High. She drew a lot of attention with her stunning features. All the Cullen kids were beautiful and special in their own unique vampire bodies, but Rosalie was on a whole new level of gorgeousness. No one could ever prepare themselves to set eyes on her for the first time.

"It will be great! I hope I can make someone cry just by looking at them!" Emmet boomed from the driver seat as he parked in a wide space under a wet willow tree on the North end of the lot. He was proud of his size and strength. If he couldn't use it on the humans he liked to still scare them with his appearance. He didn't have to do much. Just looking at his six foot four, burly frame made a person take a step back.

"Be nice, Em! I want them to like us!" Alice pleaded remembering their last home in Oxfordshire, England. "In Bampton we were shunned and thought of as freaks!"

"We are freaks,' Rosalie muttered unhappily.

"We are different! I'd like to at least be thought of as approachable. Pleasant even," Alice sighed. The kids in Bampton had been especially hard on her for her perky attitude and eccentric ways.

"Just let them keep their distance. That is the safest for everyone," Rosalie sighed as she took a gander at the student body that was making their way through the parking lot and to the front doors of the school.

"Teenage girls can be so mean," Alice remembered, still thinking about Bampton, their last home. Jasper gave Alice's hand a light squeeze and smiled. Immediately she felt his love and she gleamed with joy.

"Let's just get this over with," Rosalie huffed and was the first to get out of the jeep and step out into the sight of the student traffic filing towards the small, dingy high school.

"Three, two, one…" Alice sang and she nudged Rosalie playfully right before a thin, red-headed boy ran into a 'staff parking' sign. He had been too consumed with gawking at Rosalie to notice it in his path.

"No blood. All is well," Jasper informed his vampire siblings to let them know the coast was clear. They all let their held breath go. Alice giggled and skipped ahead with Jasper linked to her by hand.

"Poor boy," she whispered as the red head rubbed his head and moved along, embarrassed.

Instead of putting her own head down in embarrassment or in an effort to not stand out, Rosalie held her head up high and gracefully walked up the stairs leading to the front doors of the school. Emmet stood proudly by her side.

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Carlisle's day was not as eventful as his family's thus far. He went in to his new office early to prepare for the day. His hopes to having at least one patient lined up were met with disappointment.

As the clock ticked passed noon he found he had refaced his bookshelves for the third time, alphabetized the filing cabinets twice, and loaded and refilled all his diagnostic tools and dispensers so they were ready to go. He even polished every surface in sight until they sparkled back at him.

The vibration of the phone on the front desk caught his attention before it began to ring. He let it ring just once as he walked from the exam room to the front reception area. He didn't go at his true pace, he lagged a bit in case someone was peering trough a window. While in town he made it a point to always be on his best human behavior.

"Hello, Dr Cullen speaking. How may I help you?" he asked. It was the woman he had spoke to last night on the phone about the assistant position. The sound of Carlisle voice made the woman stutter over her words. He smiled and patiently waited for her to finish her ramblings before he spoke again. There was something about the voice he heard that endeared him to it.

"That sounds lovely, Mrs Roth. Would you be able to come in for an interview sometime this afternoon?"

Mrs Roth nervously agreed and said she would come by the medical building at two to meet with the mysterious, charming voice that spoke to her on the other end of the phone line.

"Very good. I look forward to meeting you at two o'clock, Mrs Roth," Carlisle spoke back, trying to be less charming so the woman on the other end would be able to speak coherently. She managed to agree and sign off with a simple 'goodbye'.

"See you this afternoon," Carlisle finalized and he hung up the phone. He sighed and looked around. _'This is going to be a long day,'_ he thought.

He was still too new and the town folk were shy. Soon, however, he would be swarming with patients eager to catch an eyeful of his youthful appearance. His bedside manner was undeniably the best that most would ever encounter and it was not uncommon for women to feign illness to get a closer look at the gorgeous, blonde doctor.

Being immortal meant that time was no longer an issue. At times like this Carlisle wondered about his impatience and found it astounding how he could feel so bored in only a few hours time when he had spent centuries on Earth and had eternity ahead of him.

Footsteps smacked the pavement outside and Carlisle hoped it would be someone coming to see him. The footsteps drew nearer and he could hear the sound of the doorknob turn. When the door did finally open it was a female mail carrier. She was dressed blue shorts, thick boots and white t-shirt. Her auburn hair was twisted into a messy bun. She was only twenty-five, but years of walking out in the sunshine with no skin protection had freckled and aged her skin so she appeared to be much older.

She stomped in with a few flyers and the local paper in her hand and came towards Dr Cullen casually. Her eyes were on the floor, on his feet, then they scanned up to his face and she stopped with a jerk before running into him.

"Uh…" she mumbled.

"Hi there!" Carlisle greeted, "I am Dr Cullen,"

"H-h-hi," she peeped and then she closed her gaping mouth. The tiny stack of folded papers in her hand were still held out in front of her, frozen like the rest of her body.

"Here, I can take those. Thank you very much for delivering them right to me. That is kind of you, Mrs…?"

"Miss!" She blurted out, "Uh. Angelica Sawyer,"

"It is nice to meet you Miss Sawyer," Carlisle said with a polite bow of his head. He could hear her heart beating a tiny bit faster than normal. It could have been from her workout. The footsteps had been quite quick for a human's. However, Angelica looked fit and her increased heart rate was more likely due to her first encounter with the new doctor.

"W-well…I'd better get back to work," Angelica spoke up after a few moments of not so polite staring. She had never seen such a pretty man in all her life.

"Have a wonderful day, Miss Sawyer,"

"You too," she barely whispered as she found the door handle and made her way outside to the street again.

Soon the gossip would begin and he would be seeing more people dropping by. Angelica Sawyer was a nice woman, but in a small town that doesn't see a lot of change, the addition of Dr Cullen and his equally beautiful family would surely be the talk of the town for weeks to come.

It was something Carlisle was prepared for. He was so adept at human behavior he was practically human himself. His vampire lure drew them in, but it was his sincere compassion to them made them unafraid and unsuspecting of his true identity.

His family was very good at the act too, but most humans found them to be luring in a frightening way and instinctively stayed away in self-preservation. Like a gazelle would run from the cheetah even if the cheetah was not in pursuit of said prey. It was better for everyone if this was the case. Safer for both parties.

*

*

*

"Class, I would like to introduce a new student," Mrs Hamilton announced at the start of the day. It was homeroom and class schedules were being handed out. The homeroom list, sadly, was not determined by last name at Kipta High. Alice pouted mildy at the fact Jasper was in a room down the hall. _'In a small town with one high school, go figure that we don't have the same homeroom class,'_ Alice moaned internally missing her mate's calming ability already.

The students all sat in clumps of friends. They had all grown up in Kipta together and knew each other well.

"This is Alice Cullen. She and her family moved here from England," Mrs Hamilton said with enthusiasm. None of the students seemed to care what Mrs Hamilton was saying. They simple gawked at Alice with wide eyes. "Why don't you introduce yourself, Alice?"

'_Oh, here we go!_' Alice thought before she spoke with eloquence in her lovely, soprano voice, "Well…my name is Alice. I have two brothers and a sister also starting school here today. We are all adopted. My father is taking up Dr Cassidy's old practice in town. We moved here from Bampton. It is a tiny town in Oxforshire, England,"

"You don't sound English!" a nice looking, brown haired boy called out from the back of the class.

"Mr Notwen, kindly refrain from shouting out in my classroom," Mrs Hamilton disciplined the teen boy. Mark was the most popular boys in his class, Alice could see that. She could also see that he was about to fall off his chair when he leaned back too far in it. She smiled to herself knowing this and gladly took a seat when Mrs Hamilton offered it.

"You are very small. How old are you?" Mark whispered. The crowd, mostly girls, surrounding him giggled rudely. Alice decided not to respond and kept looking ahead.

"Hey. I didn't mean to insult you. It is just that you look like a leprechaun or something," he continued to whisper in Alice's direction.

"You think I am a leprechaun?" Alice asked, letting her outgoing personality kick in and she faced him. It was hard for her not to speak when spoken to. It was hard for her to not speak when not spoken to as well, but she was under the family rule to be as human as possible and she came off too perky if she was allowed to ramble on in true Alice nature.

"Well, no," Mark said, shocked that she turned to him and called him on his jab.

"I am new. Aren't you supposed to be nice or something?" Alice asked pleasantly.

"You're right. Sorry, Alice Cullen from England. I am Mark Notwen. It is a pleasure to meet your acquaintance," Mark extended a sarcastic greeting to Alice. He leaned in his chair with a cocky grin on his face. Alice smiled back. _'Have a nice trip, smart ass!'_ she thought and his chair legs slid from under him and he crashed backward into the floor with a thump and a clang.

Alice was the only one who turned her attention away from the scene. While everyone laughed, pointed and helped Mark up she look forward to her desk to check out which classes she and her mate, Jasper would have together.

*

*

*

The atmosphere over at the Elementary School was no different than that of the High School. It was the first day and for most this was fun day to chat with friends and find out who your teacher for the year would be, but for Amanda Peppel it was a nightmare. She was in grade four this year so that meant she was an intermediate at her school. Her class was the oldest and the other girls in her class felt mighty high of themselves because of this.

Amanda didn't get along with the girls her age. They thought she was weird and told her so nearly every day. The whole town knew of her mother's death and so did the children. She had nowhere to hide from it. So she withdrew from them to protect herself.

She took a seat at the rear of the class to avoid contact with as many people as possible. Only, she knew this wouldn't last for long. Her new teacher was talking to the principal and they were both kept on looking over to her.

Amanda sighed and pulled her legs up so her heels were on the chair as well and she hugged her knees and put her chin in the crevasse of both and waited for someone to call on her.

Sure enough, Mrs Brightman did. As soon as the principal had left the room she focused on Amanda and waved the girl forward.

"Amanda, will you come take a seat up here, please?" she asked as if Amanda had the option of declining. The child new better. It was not a request.

So she held her head up independent from where it had been resting in between her knees and let he feet fall to the floor with a loud stomp and she stood up. The kids around her were staring.

"Thank you, dear," Mrs Brightman patronized as Amanda walked up to the front left desk closest to the teachers desk, furthest from the door.

Amanda was not a troublesome student by any means. And it wasn't that she deliberately ignored her assignments. She simply couldn't concentrate on them long enough to complete them. Amanda's mind was prone to wander. It was much easier to daydream instead of live in reality. She had not had an easy life. Her previous teacher, must had tipped Mrs Brightman off about her lack of focus, because she had not yet met her new teacher and already she was labeled as a problem child.

Amanda curled her legs up to her chest again and looked forward as Mrs Brightman began the first day rituals. Amanda was sure her new teacher was explaining the rules of the classroom and showing the students were everything was located, but she couldn't hear her speaking. No matter how hard she tried to tune in, her mind forced Mrs Brightman's words out.

She kept her eyes planted on her just in case, but she was already slipping behind.

*

*

*

It was two in the afternoon and Elizabeth Roth was driving up for her interview with the new town physician. She recently married and with her husband traveling on business she was left home and bored. She decided that getting a job would fill her time nicely, but in a small town her options were few and far between. This was her one shot at a good paying, nine to five, job.

She and her husband, Cole, had been together since graduating from Kipta High six years ago. The couple married this past summer and right after he was offered a promotion at work. He was a representative for the lumber mill and was in charge of bringing in new buyers. He was away for weeks at a time.

"Relax, Liz…just be yourself, don't say anything stupid, and you will be fine," she gave herself a pep talk as she parked in the small lot outside the two story medical building. Elizabeth lifted her glasses up and into her hair as a resting place for them. She only used them for driving to see the dashboard more clearly or for heavy reading. She looked in her rear view mirror and smacked her lips together and checked her other makeup as well. _'Here we go!' _she thought and stepped out of her firefly and slammed the door shut. A bit of paint chipped off of the dilapidated vehicle.

She wore her most professional looking outfit. A black, knee-length skirt, a white blouse with pearl buttons, tan stockings, and black pumps. She felt kind of silly dressed like this. She normally wore jeans and a simple cotton t-shirt. As she walked to the glass door to the office she caught her toe on one of the two steps and she fell.

"Oh shoot!" she mumbled under her breath. She got her self up swiftly, but was disappointed to find her right knee was scuffed and her panty hoes had a run in them. _'Smooth move. Cross 'don't do anything stupid off the list'!' _She sighed and carried on inside. A little bell chimed as she entered.

The front room was clean and bright, with 4 chairs and a small coffee table to the left for a waiting area, straight ahead was a desk with a phone, a rolodex and a large filing cabinet behind, and to the right was a doorway that lead to a hallway with many rooms protruding from it. Elizabeth waited a moment.

It didn't take more than a few seconds for Carlisle to appear. He aroused from his office and came striding though the hallway serenely. It took every muscle in Elizabeth's face to not drop her jaw at first sight of him. Elizabeth was a very attractive herself. As was her husband, but nothing compared to the man standing in front of her. She was stunned at how much beauty could reside in one person.

"Hello, Mrs Roth. It is a pleasure to meet you in person. I am Dr Carlisle Cullen," he said gently, not wanting to come on too strong and intimidate the young woman. She was tall, five foot nine at least, but rail thin. Her thick, rust colored hair was pin straight and just touched her shoulders and flipped up slightly. Her light, grey eyes were large and she had a square jaw and a pouty bottom lip.

"Hello. Thank you for seeing me," she said, impressed how she got the words out so clearly in spite of her nerves and her recent shock of seeing this blonde super model standing in front of her. For a brief moment she caught herself being disappointed that she was married. She mentally scolded herself and noticed a ring on Dr Cullen's left hand. _'Oh good, he is married. That will help the temptation,'_ she thought in desperation. The look on his face was turned down a bit and she wondered if she had made a bad impression already after only one sentence.

"You seem to have injured yourself," he pointed out kindly, not at all tempted by the smell of her blood. He was simply making conversation.

"Oh, oh ya," Elizabeth said, looking down to where his eyes rested on her scraped knee. A tiny bubbling of red had seeped out from her broken skin and had ran a few inches down her leg. She squished her face, embarrassed. She felt her glasses slipping off her head so she removed them and held them in her left hand.

"I am not well practiced for this heel height I am afraid. I tripped up the steps outside. I am sorry for my disheveled appearance," she apologized hoping this misstep would not ruin her chances of getting the assistant job.

"You don't have to apologize. Accidents happen," Carlisle lightly excused her embarrassment, "Why don't we go clean that up?"

"Oh, Uh…" Elizabeth felt her check flush from the awkward situation.

"It will give you a chance to see the exam room so you will be familiar with the facility," he told her to give her incentive. She smiled and nodded, following him to the first door on the right inside the white hallway.

*

*

*

The school bell rang at twenty after two in the afternoon. Amanda jumped in her seat it the sound and saw how the rest of her classmates were already packed up and heading for the door. She quickly closed her notebook and shoved it and her pencil into her desk. She had kept her over=sized sweatshirt on all day long so she just needed her lunch bag to leave with.

She walked casually over to the coat rack and spotted the lone, brown bag sitting on the top shelf. It still had a bruised apple inside and a squished ding dong. _'What kind of lunch is that anyway?'_ Amanda wondered.

Her caregiver, and her mother's only friend, Donna Combs, was not caring at all. She had only taken Amanda in after Amy Peppel's death because Amanda had no other family to speak of. She was tough on Amanda and did the bare minimum when it came to seeing that Amanda was clothed and fed.

Amanda had eaten a bowl of frosted flakes this morning, but nothing since and her stomach rumbled in protest. It was a feeling that Amanda excepted. It was her punishment. In her mind, she had let her mother die and she was going to suffer until the day her life came to an end to pay penance.

After taking the crinkled, brown bag off the shelf, Amanda walked fast out of her classroom, down the hall, and out the front doors. Her only friend in the world, Tyler Davis, was waiting out for her on the front steps. He was a very smart boy and he had skipped grade 4 and moved on to the middle school a year early.

"How was it?" he asked as she brisked by him. Tyler had to skip a bit to catch her pace since she didn't slow for him.

"How do you think it was?" Amanda asked rhetorically. "I was alone!"

"I am sorry. My mom made me do it. I would have stayed back with you if it was up to me," he ranted. Amanda heaved a moan and then jerked her head up in an effort to be less moody.

"It is okay. I just felt so…so…alone today without you in class," she admitted, not breaking her gaze in front of her as she walked.

"You hardly talked to me last year," he pointed out, feeling sheepish after the words came out of his mouth. He knew how broken Amanda was inside. She didn't cry in front of anyone, but he knew when she had been crying. She was teary eyed nearly every morning last year.

"I liked knowing I had a friend near. Now it is just me and all the others!" Amanda said with loathing for her fellow classmates.

Tyler knew all too well what she was getting at. He was a scrawny boy of nine. He had pale blonde hair, cut in a bowl shape around his head, glasses over his dark brown eyes, and a stick thin frame that made his head look large enough to tip him over if the wind blew.

"It wasn't fun for me either. I am the freak who skipped a grade! No one wanted to sit with me at lunch and one kid in my math class threatened to kick my ass tomorrow if I came near him,"

"Jackass! You point him out and I will beat on him!" Amanda belted out, angered that Tyler was being bullied again.

It was the story of his life. At least she didn't get physically bullied by the other kids. The girls that made her life hell only used words. Still though, it was enough to break her down when she had a moment alone to let it get to her.

"Naw…my mom said you have to ignore them and they'll leave you alone,"

"Your mom probably has never been beat up like we have," Amanda pointed out, thinking sadly about her own mother. She didn't allow herself to wallow for long. She immediately pushed the negative thought away from her consciousness.

"Maybe, but I still don't want you fighting for me. That would not help to have a girl protecting me,"

"Okay, but don't say I didn't offer. I don't want to hear you complain when you get dunked in a toilet next week!" Amanda snapped. Tyler didn't know what to say so he ignored her comment and changed the topic.

"So, did you hear? There is a new family that moved in. They are the ones that built that big place by the lake. It has three stories and a huge garage filled with fancy sports cars," he trilled. Tyler, even though he was a math and science genius, was still a typical boy when it came to mechanics and all things motorized and shiny.

Amanda shrugged. She had no idea there was anyone new in town.

"A boy in my class got to go inside the place. His dad helped to build it. He said it was the nicest house he had ever seen,"

"That's nice. Wanna go get a soda?" Amanda asked, cutting him off in boredom. She didn't have to be home until dark. "I found a dollar. We can share one,"

"Sure, okay!" Tyler agreed, knowing full well she didn't find a dollar. She stole it.

Amanda felt a bit guilty about it. She has stolen the dollar from a pair of Donna's pants in the morning before school. It wasn't that Amanda didn't know right from wrong, but she felt that a dollar here and there was not so bad considering that Donna had not spent more than the cost of a few apples and some cereal on her every week.

Amanda had only the items she had when she moved in with Donna. Nothing new, except a few notebooks and pencils for school. Donna liked to put on a good show for everyone. She was pitied for taking Amanda in. This was one more reason Amanda didn't mind stealing a dollar every once and a while from her foster parent.

Tyler's father owned the hardware shop in town and his mother had come from a weather family so he never had to worry about money. He always had nice, new clothing and the best of everything. Which, he was happy to share with his best friend if she would be inclined to except it. But Amanda was proud and hated the feeling when she couldn't pay her share.

"Hurry up then! I am thirsty!" she instructed Tyler as she sped up in the direction of the soda shop. She ditched her brown paper bag in a garbage can on the side of the road.

"Okay, but I get to choose the flavor this time. You got to choose last," Tyler agreed, struggling to keep up with her fast pace. He was taking twice as many steps as she took, but not out walking her in his efforts.

Amanda was only a bit taller than Tyler. And just as thin as he was. It had not always been that way, but she had shrunk down from lack of sleep and poor diet since she moved in with Donna Combs' home. Tyler, and everyone besides the mean girls in her school, were too polite to say it out loud, but Amanda looked unwell. She was still a pretty girl. It was clear she was. But her body had taken a beating from the grief of losing her mother.

She had naturally, thick, light brown hair that, when healthy, shone warm tones in the light. Her face was thin, but it was once a nice shape with symmetrical features within it. Her top and bottom lip were equal in fullness and beautifully set under her straight, not too round, not to angular nose. Her eyes were just the right distance apart and large, almond shape with thick, dark lashes framing them. The irises inside were brilliant blue; the one feature that had not dulled from the trauma she has faced.

When ever someone would comment on her frailty, she would demand that she was perfectly well. She hated to show weakness. She hated pity. She lied when asked if she was getting enough sleep. However, the soft, grey circles under her tired eyes gave her away.

*

*

*

"Thank you, Dr Cullen," Elizabeth said as the stunning doctor flicked the band-aid wrapper in the trash bin, taking his cool hand away from her leg. She couldn't believe how Dr Cullen fit the cliché of the doctor with cold hands. His hands were icy cold against her skin. It didn't bother her. She was actually very comfortable with him now. It had only been a few minutes, but he had her trust.

She slid off the exam table and took her purse under her arm again. If anything, being attended to by the doctor had strengthened her wish to work for him. She was taken by how easy it had been for her to let him help her. Normally she hated anyone to make a fuss over her, but Dr Cullen had managed to put her at ease.

Their conversation had gone better than she could have hoped for. He asked her questions about herself and she easily responded as he tended to her scuffed knee. She had never met anyone as smooth and sociable as Carlisle in her life.

He took her on a tour of the rest of the building and as they walked he explained what her duties would be. She was impressed at how modernly renovated the old building was now that Dr Cullen had taken over.

The first two doors on the right of the hallway opened to exam rooms and the last room on the right hand side was Carlisle's office. The first door on the left was a large room with large diagnostic machines for head scans and x-rays, and the second door on the left was a small lab. There was a bathroom at the end of the hall and to the left was a staircase leading to the second floor.

Upstairs, first door on the right, was a supply room for any drugs, pills, medications, sterile supplies, etc to be kept under lock and key. The next door on the right was a room with two beds in it for recovery. The door on the left side upstairs was a mid-sized procedure room for minor surgical procedures to and it was also used to store the larger pieces of equipment that was not in use. And the last door on the right was a broom closet.

"Well, Mrs Roth. I would love it if you came to work with me if you are still interested in the job," Carlisle extended the job offer to the young woman after they returned to the main level lobby. Elizabeth's mouth fell open.

"I…I…of course I am interested," she stuttered, shocked that she was being offered the job so easily. Carlisle smiled. He had liked Elizabeth from the moment the spoke on the phone. He had a sense that she was a good person and would be just the right person to assist him. He was right, even if he or Elizabeth didn't know it yet. She was the perfect person for this position.

"Great! You can start tomorrow if that is not too soon for you," he offered to her.

"Yes! Oh, yes," she thrilled, her face bursting at the seams from a huge smile she couldn't contain. She reached out to take his hand to shake. He returned the gesture. The corners of her smile twitched as their hands touched. _'Whoa! I was not mistaken. His hands are cold!' _Elizabeth thought. _'Oh well!'_ she let it go, squeezing his hand in gratitude.

"Thank you so much, Dr Cullen,"

*

*

*

"That was not so bad," Alice said positively as the Cullen kids returned home from school to their house in the middle of the dense woods. The trees were so abundant around the property that only the lake could be seen when you were on the East side of the house. All the windows on that side were large and had a stunning lake view.

"It was like it always is… repetitive and mundane," Rosalie grumbled as she got out her husband's jeep and slammed the door making the whole thing quake violently. Emmet winced at his wife.

"Take it easy on my car, Babe,"

"Oh, relax. It would be nothing I couldn't fix," she sighed and made her way inside the mansion. She was a mechanical whiz and one of her favorite hobbies was rebuilding and detailing cars.

Jasper gave Emmet a pity smile and then let Alice jump in his back. She put her nose into is wavy, dark blonde curls and inhaled his sweet scent.

"Well, I am off to catch the game. Hockey season is upon us. Colorado is playing Vancouver!" Emmet exclaimed happily.

"But I thought we were going to make tidal waves on the shore?" Alice reminded her big, sports loving brother. He shrugged.

"Some other time, okay, sis?" he asked. He didn't wait for an answer. He took off and headed inside. Alice pouted briefly and then jumped off Jasper's back. Images flooded her sight and Jasper knowingly stepped near her with curiosity.

"Anything interesting?" he asked her before she had the chance to piece the images together. Her face told him it was not good.

"Oh dear," she groaned and looked up at Jasper with worried eyes.

* * *

_**Thank you for reading. Please Review :)**_


	3. Crash & Burn

**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Three  
**

|Crash & Burn|

The cream soda was a good choice by Tyler. It was one of Amanda's favorites. Tyler let off that it was one of his too, but he really didn't like how sweet it was. He only chose it because he wanted to make Amanda happy. He was a good friend to her.

Yet, sitting across the booth from him in the fifties style soda shop, the pink soda had not made Amanda appear any happier. Tyler tapped the table with is knuckles and hoped for something to say that would cheer up his best friend.

At that moment, the door opened and tree girls in Amanda's grade entered. They had their hair in ponytails with matching hair clips. They wore brand name, fitted sweaters, skirts and brand new shoes. As they came inside they giggled and then once the spotted Amanda and Tyler they sneered towards them.

"Ooo, Amanda and her boyfriend!" Stacy Peterson taunted with a glint of evil in her eye. Her two best friend's, Ashley Talbot and Emily Schultz, stood by her side with equally demonic grins on their smug faces.

"Ignore them," Tyler whispered, but the trio was already walking up to their table.

"He is not my boyfriend!" Amanda raised her voice, glaring strongly at Stacy.

"Whatever you say, Panda," Ashley poked fun at Amanda's name. They sometimes called her Pebbles or Pepper too. It was childish and it wasn't the words that were bad, but the cruel way they messed with her name made Amanda want to cry. Of course; she would never let them see that.

"Get bent!" she screamed angrily instead. A few other customers looked over to see what was going on. Stacy and her minions backed off and giggled nastily all the way to the counter to get their ice cream.

"Don't let them get to you, Mandi. They are just jealous," Tyler made his best effort to comfort Amanda. She let the air escape from her lips in a huff of disbelief.

"Of what? I have nothing!" she blurted out, looking out the window wistfully. She didn't like being this much of a downer. Normally, she could pull herself together when she was with Tyler, but today had been more frustrating than usual because of school starting. Amanda sighed and closed her eyes.

"I am sorry, Ty. I had a bad day," she made her excuse.

"It okay," he mumbled, feeling hurt that she didn't catch the meaning behind his words. He thought the world of Amanda and their friendship. He thought she felt the same about him, but lately it was hard to tell.

"Don't you have piano at three-thirty today?" Amanda remembered all of a sudden, surprising herself that she was that in tune with the date and time. Tyler took lessons every Monday after school since the first grade.

"Oh ya!" he exclaimed, jumping up in a panic. "I'd better go! My mom will kill me if I am late!"

"I doubt she'd go that far, Ty. It's just a piano lesson," Amanda teased, trying to end their time together on a more upbeat note.

"Well…you know…I mean…" he bumbled over his words as he packed up his stuff.

"I know, just go. See you tomorrow?" she asked hopefully.

"Yep! Bye Mandi!" he called as he ran to the door. He turned as he exited and added, "Thanks for the soda!"

Amanda nodded and gave her best attempt at a smile. Tyler took off in a mad rush down the sidewalk towards Pinewood Ave. All the roads off of Main Street were named after trees. Amanda used to find this fascinating as a younger child, but it no longer amused her. This whole town was like a trap. Everyone was always acting so cheerful and pleasant. It was unnatural, she felt. She wished to escape from Kipta someday.

Amanda paused for a second or so to compose herself. Stacy, Ashley, and Emily were all making a not so subtle point of talking loudly and pointing in her direction. Amanda got up and stormed out of the soda shop. The traffic was slow in Kipta. Main Street had the largest flow, but even at rush hour she could run across without a crosswalk so long as she looked both ways first.

Amanda sometimes dared herself not to check for cars and to just run out. She hoped to die quickly when her time came. Her common sense told her that she'd probably just be injured if a car hit her. The speed limit was thirty kilometers per hour in most parts of town. Not fast enough to kill her, just mangle her up a bit. And she certainly didn't need another disadvantage in life.

So with another morbid idea pushed back in her mind, she looked for cars and then hurried to the other side of the road. She took a right and continued along down the sidewalk. Her mind fixed on how she would one day leave this town to get away from all the bad memories.

She noticed a woman getting into a tiny, banged up, red car in the parking lot ahead. The woman opened her car door, got inside and then before she pulled her last, heeled leg inside, she paused. Amanda watched intently. The red haired woman, dressed in a nice skirt and blouse combo got back out of her vehicle and hurried towards the building beside.

Amanda looked over at the car as she walked by. The door was left open and something flashed hot white in the ignition as the light hit on it.

Keys! The woman left her keys in the ignition!

Amanda didn't know a lot about cars, but she knew that you needed the keys to drive them. Impulsively, Amanda ran for the car and jumped inside. _'This is my chance!'_ she thrilled. Adrenaline pulsed through her veins and made her insides want to burst with anticipation. _'If I can just make it out of town I will be okay,'_ she decided, unreasonably.

She shut the door and turned the key. The car started more easily than she could have hoped for. Instead of that making her fearful it only egged her onward. She remembered from her mom's old car that you had to make the dash show the 'R' to back up. She pulled the knob sticking out of the dash and just like it was meant to be the dash read 'R' and she pushed on the gas.

The car jerked back and she released the pedal. _'Too hard I guess,'_ she decided. Then she pulled the knob towards the roof of the car to put it on 'D' for 'drive'. She gripped the wheel tightly and tried the pedal again. This time she pressed lightly and the car began to inch forward.

Amanda turned the wheel and got the car to turn slightly to the left so it was nearly facing the street. She hit a curb and then panicked. Her foot slammed down on the pedal and reared forward.

She twisted the steering wheel back the other way, sending herself and the car forward right into side of the building in front of her.

SMASH!

*

*

*

Inside his office, Dr Carlisle Cullen was putting away some of the forms his newly hired assistant had just filled out. He was pleased with his finding. Elizabeth Roth was a sweet woman with a desire to help others. He knew she was the right person for the job. _'And the only person who applied,'_ he chuckled to himself as he realized his good fortune in finding her.

Carlisle went into exam room one to put a new lining on the table. He noticed a pair of reading glasses on edge and picked them up. He heard the bells on the front door ring and he ventured back to the reception guessing who it was. Sure enough, Elizabeth was back. She was about to explain, but he held up her glasses.

"Your spectacles, Mrs Roth," he kindly handed them to her. She cringed at the sound of her formal name. Carlisle picked up on it.

"Thank you. I have a bad track record for keeping…um...spectacles," she chocked over the word, thinking momentarily how old fashion it sounded. Then she picked up where she left off, "Thanks again, Dr Cullen. For everything,"

"You are welcome, Mrs Roth. And please, call me Carlisle. Dr Cullen sounds a bit 'old'," he laughed at his own private joke. If she knew he was actually over three hundred years old, she would probably not be laughing with him. Elizabeth agreed with a nod, happy he brought the topic of names up.

"Carlisle," she repeated. _'Unusual name,' _she thought to herself. She continued, "And Liz…or Elizabeth is fine. Mrs Roth is my husband's mother,"

Carlisle laughed and agreed to her request. She put her glasses back up on the top of her head and turned to leave. The phone rang. Not the office phone. It was his cell phone that was sitting on his desk in his office. Elizabeth didn't hear it. She headed to the door.

A sound of brakes startled Carlisle and he ignored the ringing phone. He listened more carefully to the sounds from outside. An engine roared and he heard the sound getting louder in their direction.

"Elizabeth!" he called and took her by the wrist and pulled her back towards him.

SMASH!

*

*

*

"Alice! What is going on?" Jasper questioned the tiny, black haired vampire as she took his cell phone and frantically found her father's number on the speed dial. The phone rang on the other end.

"Is Dad in trouble of some sort?" Jasper asked again, worried for Carlisle, thinking he may be in danger. Jasper wondered if he should go to his aid.

"Dad is fine. A little girl is about to come crashing through his office and he and a woman are inside. I hope I can warn him in time to stop this from happening," she spoke at such a speed that only vampires could have made it out. The phone rang on the other end of the line again. Alice bounced in place with nervousness.

"I am sure Dad will do what he can to protect them," Jasper was the voice of reason.

"I know! I know! I should have been paying closer attention instead of goofing around. The child driving the car is only about 7 or 8!" she explained her guilt.

"Wait! The child is driving?" Jasper asked, making sure Alice had her story correct. Alice nodded vigorously.

"Damn it! His voice mail! I must be too late!" she shrieked. She threw her hands down and grimaced. Jasper held out a hand to her to console her. She was too angry with herself to accept his soothing.

*

*

*

"What the? My car!" Elizabeth shrilled as Dr Cullen released his protective arc around her and she saw what had made the loud crash through the front bay windows.

"Elizabeth, are you alright?" Carlisle asked, scanning her carefully. She appeared to be unscathed. The glass that flew in had bounced off his back and not touched her.

"Ye..ye..yeah!" she said, confused at how her car managed to park itself halfway inside the lobby and half on the sidewalk outside.

Amanda sat still for a moment, holding the steering wheel tightly between her fists. She could barely see over it, but she knew she was not outside anymore.

"Oops," she muttered deeply, her eyes wide with shock. She wasn't sure if she should get out and run. She tried the handle, but the door was jammed.

Carlisle hadn't realized a child was in the car until he heard her voice. He released Elizabeth and ran to the car door.

"Oh my God!" she gasped as she noticed Amanda in the driver seat. Elizabeth rushed to Carlisle's side at once. He was able to pull the door open in one easy pull. Amanda looked over to him still stunned from the accident, but now just as shocked at the pretty face addressing her with concerned eyes.

The child staring back at him tugged at his still heart. Something about her grabbed hold of him at first sight. He wondered if maybe it was her scent. She smelt wonderful and refreshing. Oddly, the the child's scent comforted him somehow. He couldn't smell any exposed blood. This pleased him. But he still worried she may have injured herself internally. She had no seat belt on.

"Elizabeth, grab me a neck brace from the storage room, please," he instructed. Elizabeth acted accordingly and was glad the tour she had just been on was fresh in her mind. She knew exactly where to go. She hurried to retrieve Carlisle's request.

"I'm sorry," Amanda told him, thinking that maybe this was an angel of some sort and she really had gone too far this time.

"Don't you worry about a thing, Sweetheart," Carlisle told her, reaching in to hold her head steady until Elizabeth returned. Amanda shivered at his touch and she got a bit scared.

"Am I dead?" she asked, thinking that perhaps death was not so bad after all. She felt no pain. She wondered if she got lucky somehow.

"No, Sweetie. You are not dead," Carlisle told the frail child. "My name is Dr Cullen. You can call me Carlisle if you'd prefer,"

He counted her pulse and was amazed at how calm the little girl was. Elizabeth returned with the brace to stabilize the child's neck. Elizabeth had brought back the small size. Carlisle was impressed since he had not told her which size to get."What is your name?" Carlisle asked the child. Amanda wasn't sure if she liked this man yet. He was too perfect and she didn't trust that. She looked away and kept her mouth closed. Elizabeth recognized her and piped up.

"Amanda. Amanda Peppel," she uttered softly. Carlisle glanced over to Elizabeth with a small smile to thank her.

"I am going to just lift you forward a bit, Amanda. You tell me if I am hurting you, okay?" he spoke calmly. Amanda was less in shock now and more annoyed as she realized that she was not dead and that she was actually in a lot of trouble.

"I'm fine! Let me go!" she stated strongly, struggling to free herself from his vice grip on her head and neck. Elizabeth stepped in and did as Carlisle told her.

"Slip it behind her head. That's it," he coached and slid one hand out at a time, all the while tightening the collar around Amanda to steady her neck in case she had a spinal injury. She tried to pull his hands away from her, but he was too strong. She didn't notice the coldness of his skin in her moment of shock.

"I'm fine. Let me go!" she repeated as he braced to lift her out of the car. Elizabeth moved out of his way.

"Don't be frightened. I just want to make sure you are not hurt anywhere. It would help me out if you would lie very still for me," he soothingly demanded of Amanda. She didn't see that she had much of an option so she relaxed and gave in to him.

"I'm not hurt," she told him defiantly as he rushed her into the first exam room and placed her on the table. Elizabeth joined them, hoping to be of some use, but she was more shocked then the doctor or little girl combined.

"I am so glad to hear that, Amanda, but I would like to check you over myself to be sure," Carlisle spoke gently down at her.

He heard the spectators outside starting to line up and ask questions. He looked to Elizabeth and said; "I don't think I need your help in here right now. Would you please go and keep the crowd outside and tell them that everything is fine?"

Elizabeth nodded and went to leave.

"Oh, and if you can try to get a hold of Amanda's parents too, that would be tremendously helpful," Carlisle added as he felt Amanda's ankles, legs and pelvis for signs of any broken bones. She groaned at his last request and he immediately pulled his hands away from her hipbone. Elizabeth sighed sadly and left to do as she was told, knowing that Amanda lived with Donna Combs, and that the child had no known living relatives.

"Does that hurt?" he asked, concerned that she had moaned as he pressed on her pelvic bone.

"No," was all she said. He was not going to take chances. A broken pelvis was serious. If the bones were broken they could cut into her femoral artery and she could bleed out internally. He pumped up a cuff on her skinny arm and placed his stethoscope in his ears and the bell over her Brachial artery. If she was bleeding internally her pressure should be low.

Amanda's blood pressure was actually a touch on the high side of the scale for her height and weight, but Carlisle assumed it was a stress reaction and was happy with the results.

"Do you really have to call her?"

"Your mother?" he guessed, lifting her tattered sweater up a bit and sliding his hand in to place the cold metal piece of the stethoscope on her chest. Amanda shivered on contact, but didn't look him in the eye; hurt because she wished that he mother really were there to yell at her for being so stupid. Amanda was embarrassingly aware that she had done something idiotic and dangerous.

Carlisle noticed how distressed Amanda was. He listened to both sides of her chest and was satisfied. The soft flow of air whooshing in and out of her lungs was a good sign. They were clear. He removed his hand from under her shirt and the stethoscope from his ears. He laid it beside her on the table.

"Yes, dear. I do have to call her. I am sure she will be relieved to know you are okay," he answered her question. He could understand why she was upset. She had just driven a car through a window. He assumed she was scared of the trouble she was in.

"No one is angry with you. It was an accident and I am sure if you explain yourself, you will be forgiven,"

Amanda first tried to shake her head, but it was impossible in the brace. The doctor had no idea how wrong he was. Donna Combs was not going to be as kind as he was being to her. Amanda tried to hold back her tears as they burned in her eyes."Try not to move your head, Sweetie," he told her. She didn't make a sound so he continued his exam. He checked her shoulders, arms, and wrists next. Then he carefully pressed on her rib cage on both sides of her chest, moving down them slowly until he was sure that none were fractured. Pleased that she didn't cry out in pain, he smiled at her.

"Can you take this off now?" Amanda asked, reaching up to her neck. She had successfully stifled her tears and was now more concerned about getting out of the brace. Carlisle was relieved that she appeared to have not broken anything. She has not been wearing a seat belt. If she had been going at a greater speed she could have gone through the windshield. He leaned over her and smiled.

"I will in just a moment, Amanda. I need to check one more thing first, okay?"

"Okay," she agreed, but felt ticked off at this whole situation. She had really messed things up for herself now. Donna would surly let her have it this time.

"Watch my finger. That is good. And over here," Carlisle commanded Amanda's attention as he shone a light in her eyes, one at a time. Her pupils were responsive. Then her gently probed her forehead with his fingertips, moving to the sides and back of her head feeling for any bumps.

"Did you hit your head on the wheel, Amanda?"

"No,"

"On the window?" he asked, to be thorough, but he was now certain that she was not injured.

"No. I told you already. I'm not hurt!" she stated clearly.

"That's right. You did tell me that," he chuckled.

"Can I get up now?" Amanda asked impatiently.

"Hold on. I am going to take this collar off your neck, but I don't want you to move your head until I say so. Do you understand?" Carlisle asked Amanda, staring into her eyes.

"Yes," she sighed.

"Okay," he agreed as he undid the velcro straps and held her head still to slip the brace off. "Does this hurt?" he asked moving her head to the right.

"No,"

"How about this?" he asked again as he turned her head to the left.

"No," she mumbled in a low, annoyed tone. He smiled and tilted her head back and looked at her for her response.

"I'm fine. Can I go now?"

"Let's just sit you up for a moment and see how you are," he told her, helping her into a seated position.

She turned to face him and let her legs hang from the edge of the table. He watched her to make sure she didn't get dizzy, but Amanda seemed to be doing well considering the damage the accident had caused to the building and Elizabeth's vehicle. Elizabeth entered the room cautiously. She had answered the onlookers prying questions and got a hold of Donna Combs, who was on her way to pick up Amanda.

"Ms Combs is on her way," she informed Carlisle.

"Thank you, Elizabeth,"

"How are you feeling, Amanda?" she asked with care, watching the girl closely.

"Good," Amanda replied in a tiny voice. Elizabeth stepped inside the room and stood next to the table.

"I am glad you were not seriously injured," she told Amanda, seeing that it was okay to come in by the expression Carlisle gave her. She added, "My car was not as fortunate,"

"I am sorry I crashed your car," Amanda apologized, not able to look Elizabeth in the eye.

"I forgive you," Elizabeth said without hesitation. Carlisle smiled softly at her in admiration for her kindness towards the child. "But I would like to know what you were thinking when you decided to hijack my car,"

"I…I…" Amanda tried to come up with a good reason, but she didn't have anything to say. And she didn't want to explain that she was trying to run away. She closed her mouth and kept her head down.

"You are a very lucky girl, Amanda," Carlisle told her. She sighed and her mouth turned downward in more prominent frown. He was too nice. Amanda still wasn't sure if she liked him or not.

"You could have been hurt," Elizabeth scolded, "And you could have hurt others as well,"

"I didn't mean to crash," Amanda muttered under her breath.

"As pleased as I am to hear that you didn't intentionally destroy the property of Mrs Roth's and mine, I would like to hear an explanation to what you really were doing behind the wheel of a car," Carlisle insisted. Amanda didn't look up. She pressed her lips together more tightly. She was not about to tell them.

Carlisle could here someone walking through the debris to enter the building.

*

*

*

"Hello?" Donna called out. She had been watching television in her pajamas when she got the call that Amanda had been in an accident. She had quickly thrown on her raincoat and some boots. Her mousy brown hair was tied up in a knot on her head and her small, beady eyes were scanning the damage.

"Donna," Elizabeth was the first to come greet Amanda's guardian.

"Liz. What happened?"

"Everything is fine. Amanda took a slight joy ride in my car, but she is unharmed. Dr Cullen is just finishing up with her now,"

"She drove your car in here?" Donna asked with horror, "How did she manage that?"

"I left the keys in the ignition and went inside to get my glasses that I left here and Amanda must have climbed in and tried to drive it," Elizabeth explained in one garbled sentence.

"Unbelievable!" Donna seethed through her teeth.

*

*

*

Inside the exam room, Amanda cringed as she overheard Donna's loud voice. Carlisle picked her up under her arms and placed her on the floor gently.

"Are you ready to go out there? Or do you need another minute to rest?" he asked kindly. Amanda gulped back a lump in the back of her throat and looked to the hallway. She shrugged apathetically.

"May as well get this over with," she somberly answered him tucking her long, tangled hair behind her ears. Carlisle followed Amanda out of the room and towards the lobby where they joined Donna and Elizabeth's.

"I wasn't gone long. But I should not have left the keys in my car. I am so sorry, Donna," Elizabeth apologized. Amanda walked up behind Elizabeth slowly. Carlisle stood behind Amanda and placed his hand lightly on her shoulders to support her. Amanda brushed them off and stepped aside. She was really starting to dislike him.

"Don't apologize for the child, Liz. She knows better!" Donna said loudly for Amanda's ears, "At least she should know better. What the hell were you thinking?" Donna turned her angry, red face towards Amanda.

"I…was…just…" Amanda said each word on its own as Donna scowled down at her.

"You weren't thinking!" Donna screamed and waved Amanda over to her. Carlisle was shocked. Elizabeth was not quite as stunned by Donna's behavior. She went to high school with Donna and Amanda's mother so she knew the kind of person Donna was. Selfish and unfeeling.

"Ms Combs," Carlisle addressed her, realizing that Amanda was not Donna's biological child from their names and their appearances. "It is a pleasure to meet you. I am Dr Cullen,"

"Hi," Donna said sharply. Then she really caught a glimpse of the handsome doctor and blushed.

"Amanda seems to be uninjured. She doesn't appear to have a concussion. No broken bones. She was very lucky," he explained to the scruffy woman in front of him.

"I don't know what to say. I am so embarrassed," was her reply. Carlisle was a bit repulsed that she still hadn't shown any relief that Amanda was all right yet.

"I recommend you keep a close eye on her this evening and I would like to exam her again tomorrow to be certain she has no lingering injuries,"

"Of course. Sure thing," Donna replied, fingering her hair back to try to straighten herself out. Elizabeth smiled at Donna's awkward stance. Donna then said, "I don't know how I will be able to pay for this damage. I have no insurance for this sort of thing," Amanda rolled her eyes. Donna Combs had nothing to her name. She slept around with loser guys and let them support her for a while until they got fed up and left her. She worked part time at the general store as a cashier, but spent all her money on cigarettes and liquor.

"Don't worry about that, Ms Combs. I have insurance," Dr Cullen told her, "but you will have to talk to Mrs Roth about her car damages,"

"I have coverage, but the deductible is $300," Elizabeth informed Donna, who glared at Amanda.

"I have a thought," Carlisle stepped in, seeing Donna about to lose her temper with Amanda over the mention of money she obviously didn't have. "I will pay the deductible on Mrs Roth's car,"

"That is kind of you, but I can't ask you to do that," Donna tried to sound important. Carlisle interrupted.

"You don't have to ask. It will be my pleasure," he said.

"Carl…Dr Cullen," Elizabeth piped up. She wanted to remember to call him by his professional name when they were in someone else's company. "I can afford to pay it, there is no need,"

"Hear me out," he continued, " I will pay the deductible. And in return... Amanda will come to work here after school each afternoon until she has worked off her debt,"

"Fine!" Donna agreed without questions.

"What?" Amanda blurted out.

"I think it is fair. What do you think, Mrs Roth," Carlisle left the final decision up to Elizabeth who picked up on his intentions.

"I think that sounds more than fair," she agreed, eying Amanda sternly.

"I'm a kid!" Amanda protested.

"You obviously feel that you were old enough to get behind the wheel of a car. So, I will assume you are old enough to work to pay for the damages you have created," Elizabeth said to Amanda in a tone of voice that had her feeling like her own mother. She was kind of impressed with herself for how it had come across.

"Unless you would like to try again and tell us why you stole the car in the first place?" Carlisle gave Amanda an out. However, Amanda couldn't do that. She didn't want to tell them that she wanted to run away, that she hoped to die, that she really didn't care about what happened to her life. She would only make matters worse for herself if she told them the truth. So she balled her fists and shut her mouth and took the punishment. "It is settled then. I will see you tomorrow at 2:30 when you are finished with school," Carlisle said calmly after Amanda silently refused his offer to tell them the truth.

And that is when Amanda decided not to like Dr Cullen.

*

*

*

Elizabeth had made a great first impression on Carlisle Cullen. Not only did she assist him in a moment of crisis, she managed to track down Donna Combs, ward of the curious town folk, and call a tow truck and a repairman on her first unofficial day as his new assistant.

Carlisle drove her home and thanked her for all her help.

"I guess you start today," he teased as he pulled to her modest, one level home. It was painted soft yellow and had a white picket fence around the yard.

"I guess so. What a day!" she replied and turned to him to explain something to him that he needed to know. "You know.... Amanda is a good kid,"

"I am certain of it," he agreed. Carlisle believed that every person was innately good.

"I knew her mother. I went to school with her. Amy was a wonderful girl, but she had a rough life and when she got pregnant in grade 11, she didn't have the easiest time. Her boyfriend left and she raised Amanda alone," Elizabeth explained. Carlisle nodded, encouraging her to continue.

"Amy had no family. Her father went to prison a year after Amanda was born. And he died of heart failure not even a year later. Amy loved Amanda dearly, but she was not a great mother, I am sorry to say. She didn't have a mother of her own and, consequently, she had no idea how to love a child herself," Elizabeth told him and then paused. She wasn't sure if she should tell him the rest of the story.

"That is very sad," he empathized. He didn't need to hear this story to have noticed Amanda's state of declining health. The child he had tended to this afternoon was underweight and sullen. She didn't look nor behave like the average 8-year-old girl.

"Yes...it is," Elizabeth said, biting her lip afterward, contemplating if she should go on. She knew most of this from gossip, because she had not been a close friend of Amy Peppel. Carlisle sensed she had more to say.

"That is not the whole story," he suggested.

"No…it is not," Elizabeth admitted, "Amy committed suicide almost a year ago. Amanda found her body and called 911, but they were too late. By the time they arrived, Amy was already gone,"

"Dear Lord," Carlisle prayed, saddened by this reveal. He could understand now why Amanda was frail. She was still grieving the death of her mother.

"The whole town is merciless. It was gossip before Amy's body had been removed from her home. Amanda probably knows that she is talked about often. In a small town like this one, she is well known. Unfortunately, people are not always subtle in their gossip. It is a lot for a child to bear,"

"You think I was too hard on her today? Making her work off the cost of your car's deductible?" Carlisle questioned Elizabeth, rethinking his motives. He had wanted to teach Amanda about responsibility, but maybe he had been to harsh on the child.

"No. I think you were absolutely right. Amanda needs some sort of structure in her life and what she did today was dangerous. She should have to pay a consequence for her actions," Elizabeth stated firmly. Carlisle nodded and took in an unnecessary breath."I just wanted to tell you some of her story so you would understand her a bit better. She won't be telling you on her own. She has shut the world out. And Donna Combs is not about to help Amanda find her way back, that is for sure. She is a foul woman,"

"Thank you for telling me, Elizabeth," he told her.

"I am sorry to say such harsh words about Donna. But I went to school with her. She made my life hell back then. I have sympathy for Amanda. Her mother never should of left without making sure Amanda had a good home to go to,"

"You are a good person, Elizabeth," Dr Cullen complimented her. He was thrilled to have met her and have her as an employee. "You and I are going to get alone well,"

"Thank you, Carlisle," she broke the tension with a smile as she opened the car door and stepped out. "For the compliment and for paying the deductible on my vehicle. You are a very generous man. I am grateful. It is sad that the silly thing is hardly worth that anymore,"

He laughed with her and she closed the passenger door on his BMW and headed toward her front door. Carlisle smiled to himself and then headed back to work to clean up.

*

*

*

When Carlisle arrived home after boarding up the front windows of the clinic Alice greeted him for the news.

"So, she is okay then?" she asked quickly in her high, merry voice. Calrisle had barely stepped out of his car as she bombarded him.

"Yes. The child is just fine. It was you who called, I assume?"

"Ya. I am so sorry. I wasn't looking for it so I didn't catch it fast enough. I was so worried she might be hurt and it would be my fault!" Alice bantered so fast it was even hard for Carlisle to understand her.

"Alice, you don't control the future. You don't have to carry that responsibility on you shoulders. I have told you that before," he consoled her. She sighed and slowed down her pace. She liked to think he was right, but when she saw accidents happening she felt it was her duty to help prevent them.

They entered the house together and headed upstairs to where they could hear the noise of the TV.

"So, you have a new assistant? I see that working out well," she made conversation.

"As do I," Carlisle agreed.

"And you have another helper…" Alice probed wanting to hear the news from Carlisle himself. He smiled at Alice. Her upbeat nature always cheered him up.

"Yes, Alice. As if you didn't see that too,"

"I did!" she cheered. "The girl is awfully scrawny, though,"

"Look who is talking, pipsqueak!" Emmet belted out as Carlisle and Alice entered the living room were the rest of the family was residing. Alice stuck her tongue out at him. Carlisle didn't acknowledge Alice's observation of Amanda's well being. He wanted to see his wife. It had been an eventful day and in his mind there was nothing better than coming home to his family and spending time with them and his loving wife.

"Darling. How are you? Alice filled me in on some of the details," Esme hummed lovingly.

"I am fine, Love," he told her and kissed her tenderly. His hand was in the small of her curved back and the other was against her smooth, pale skin of her neck. This was just what he needed to end his first day.

And tomorrow would surly bring new surprises. Amanda had not left his office pleased with him. She was the only person in town that he had been in contact with that seemed to not like him very well. He hoped he could change her mind. He felt there was something special about her. He was in for a big surprise…

* * *

**You have read...Please Review! :D I always respond to reviews by PM. **(Unless you post annoymously)**  
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	4. Aftermath

**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Four**

|Aftermath|

"Arrrgh!" Amanda growled as she saw the light shining in the tiny window of her small room. It had only a mattress on the floor for her to sleep on and a white, chipped dresser with all her belongings, including books, inside. Her mattress was tucked in one corner and the other side of the room was a pile of Donna's old magazines and papers she couldn't seem to get rid of.

It was the morning after the accident. Amanda sat up and looked over at the ticking clock on the floor beside her. She had to be to school in five minutes. The alarm setting on the ancient clock only seemed to work half the time.

Amanda heaved all the air out of her body in despair and moaned. _'Great! Just fantastic! I am going to be late on my second day!' _she scolded herself as she stood herself up. Blood rushed from her head to her lower extremities and made her stumble over into her dresser.

She held on to steady herself and the dizziness passed. She grabbed her jeans from the floor and shoved one leg in at a time and pulled them up. They had a hole in the right knee. She tore off her baggy t-shirt she wore to sleep in and grabbed the cleanest long-sleeved, cotton shirt she could find and pulled it over her head.

There was no time to find food. She ran to the bathroom and turned the tap on and splashed cold water to her face and neck. She looked for a towel, but there were none clean. She did the best she could with the sleeve of her shirt and wiped her face dry and tucked her hair behind her ears.

Amanda found her scuffed up sneakers at the door and quickly slipped them on and tied the laces. She didn't bother finding socks. She was late already. She didn't even bother to find her only coat. She just ran out the door.

She ran all the way to the end of Birch, turned on Main and then after a few blocks turned again on Maple. All the schools were located on Maple Avenue. Sadly for her, the elementary was the last one on right. It took her a total of six minutes to run from her house to the school

Amanda burst through the front doors, ignored the secretary from the office calling after her to take a late slip, and ran to her class. She violently threw herself into the door as she turned the doorknob and she stumbled in.

"Amanda, you are late!" Mrs Brightman stated the obvious as Amanda stood there, at the front of the class, gulping in thick lumps of air. She took a few steps towards her front row seat, but before she could reach it the teacher stopped her.

"You can take a seat outside in the hallway, please. We have already started the class. You are interrupting,"

Amanda could hardly hear her teacher's words with the buzzing sounds in her ears, but she nodded, her mouth open to catch oxygen, and back up into the hall. She was just sliding her back down the wall to sit when the door shut rather loudly behind her. Mrs Brightman's voice continued to mumble on through the closed door.

*

*

*

Alice sighed and put her head down in anticipation of what she saw coming.

"Hey Leprechaun!" Mark bellowed out across the cafeteria to Alice who was sitting down with her siblings at the farthest table from the lunch line. His friends laughed at his attempt to tease the tiny, pixie girl.

"Who's the ass?" Emmet questioned Alice with a silly grin on his dimpled face.

"Mark Notwen," Alice mumbled, throwing a piece of carrot back into the salad she was pretending to eat.

"Want me to rattle him up a bit? I guarantee he won't bother you again," Emmet offered.

"Emmet! He is a child," Jasper corrected. He was the leader when it came to peacekeeping at school. Jasper knew Emmet was kidding around, but since Emmet had the most recent slip up on his not-so-good name, he liked to keep the big brute in check.

"I was only joking around, Jazzy. Relax,"

"It is no big deal. He will soon get bored and stop," Alice mumbled sadly. None of the girls in her grade were friendly to her now that Mark had started teasing her. They all looked up to him and followed his lead.

"Alice, forget the mundanes! You don't need to be friends with everyone!" Rosalie snapped in disgust for her sister's wish to have human friends.

"It will happen, I know it!" Alice retorted with surety.

"Have you seen that?" Jasper asked. If Alice said something was going to happen, he believed it. He had total faith in her ability to see the future. The others were not as enthusiastic about it since Alice was a bit of a know-it-all and won at every game they played with her. Jasper didn't mind.

"No…. Not yet. But I am sure of it. 'I' just know!" she replied, emphasis on 'I'.

"Hah!" Rosalie laughed.

"I am sure you are right, dear. If that is what you wish for," Jasper told Alice kindly and squeezed her hand with love.

A vision brightened her day. She had gym class with Mark after lunch and she saw him getting hit with a volleyball in the head. She snorted with pleasure as she saw this. Rosalie was staring at her with a disgusted, snotty expression when she snapped out of it. She glared back and then turned to Jasper and her face lit up again. Alice was sure that she would have human friends soon. Not necessarily from her grade, but she just had a feeling that something big was coming to change their lives forever.

*

*

*

"Good day, Dr Cullen," Elizabeth greeted Carlisle as she entered the medical building early for work that morning. She had hoped to help clean up after the accident yesterday, but the place was spotless.

"Good morning, Elizabeth. Call me Carlisle, please," he greeted her and reminded her she was free to address him less formally.

"Oh course," she answered and put her purse on the roller chair behind the desk and laid her jacket over the backrest. "I see you have been working overtime,"

"Yes. I came in a bit early to clean up. The men were already here and laid the new bricks. By this afternoon the new window will be here,"

"Sounds wonderful," Elizabeth said pleasantly.

"With your car in the shop I should have offered you a ride this morning," Carlisle mentioned, feeling guilty he only thought of it now.

"Oh, no problem. I don't live far. The walk was refreshing,"

"And I see you have left the heels at home today," Carlisle made mention of her safer foot wear.

Elizabeth laughed and nodded. After spending one afternoon in her three-inch pumps her feet had already taken a beating. Instead, she wore some black, ballet flats with black slacks and a red blouse.

"I figured, I got the job, it was time to loose the heels!" she joked back. She couldn't believe how outgoing she was behaving, but she felt like Carlisle was an old friend already. Making conversation with him was effortless. When he chuckled at her comment she smiled, feeling better that he obviously didn't find her brazen.

"I am not quite sure what today will bring, Elizabeth. Truth be told, it will likely be slow. There have been no calls yet," he confided in his assistant.

"Things will pick up soon, I'll bet. You have to give people time. They were comfortable with Dr Cassidy and when he passed on the town was in shock. They have a hard time warming up to anyone new. You know...set in their ways," Elizabeth explained. Carlisle listened intently and smiled in appreciation.

"That is most likely the case, you're correct," he agreed with her assessment.

"Thank you. Also, you are very young looking," she blurted out. She realized how rude she was being and faced Carlisle. "I'm sorry. That was inappropriate. I just meant that Dr Cassidy was older and familiar. You are just a lot more... new looking," she rambled and then caught herself.

"No need to apologize. I quite understand," Carlisle serenely said. He was not offended in the slightest. He knew what she was saying was the truth. He was awfully young looking to be a doctor.

"It was rude. I sometimes forget to edit my thoughts when I speak," she flustered.

"I tried growing a moustache and goatee once, but I looked like Coronal Sanders without the spectacles," he joked with her to make her feel less self-conscious. It worked. Elizabeth broke out in laughter.

"I am sure they will be breaking down the door any day now once the word spreads about how great a doctor you are….and the fact that you look nothing like Coronel Sanders will help!" Elizabeth bantered. Just then, the phone rang. "Oooo…here they come!" she delighted in a high voice, her mouth round. She giddily snuck behind the desk and took her seat. The phone rang again and she picked it up and held it to her ear. She and Carlisle's eyes met in amusement.

"Hello, Dr Cullen's office. This is Elizabeth speaking. How can I help you?" she said in her friendliest, professional voice that she could muster up. In truth, it was a bit over the top, but Carlisle enjoyed her enthusiasm and bowed out of the lobby so she could speak in private.

He went to his office to call Esme and let her know how much he missed her when he was at work. It didn't matter that they had eternity ahead of them to be together. Each day was blissful to the happy couple.

*

*

*

Amanda was back in class again.

Mrs Brightman left her out in the hallway until the bell for recess rang. She had forgotten that Amanda was out there in actual fact. When she exited the classroom to refill her coffee in the staffroom at the break she found Amanda still sitting, cross-legged, against the wall and told her to go inside the classroom and copy the spelling words that were on the board into her notebook.

Amanda obeyed, pleased she didn't have to go outside. She neatly wrote each word into her blank notebook. As she copied them in she spelled them out in her head in hopes she would learn them more quickly and have something to show for her efforts. She didn't like feeling like a failure.

The bell rang after fifteen minutes and the kids came in from outside laughing and playing around with one another. Amanda ignored them and continued scratching pretty designs in the margin of her notebook.

After the class settled down, Mrs Brightman handed out a reading assignment. The instructions were to read the short story and then answer the 6 questions at the bottom of the handout. Amanda put the paper in front of her and began to read. It was a story about the Inuit and how they built igloos out of snow and all the tools they used and what they used them for.

Once she was finished reading she quickly went to the questions before she forgot what she had read or got distracted. It was too late, however. The first question stumped her and she became discouraged. She tried to read the question again in hopes she would understand what it was asking better the second time.

"Hey…what did you get for the first one?" Jason Williams whispered from the desk next to Amanda.

"I don't know!" Amanda answered him and scowled down at her paper.

She knew she should go on to the next question, but she was too frustrated with herself for not knowing the first one. The third time she read the first question it made even less sense to her. Her exhaustion and her anger mixed together finally made her give up. She folded her arms on her desk and buried her head down into them.

This was not going to be a good day.

*

*

*

Later that day, Elizabeth had finished reorganizing Dr Cassidy's patient files to a system that suited her better. She also began electronically organizing Dr Cullen's schedule on the computer he had newly installed into the stale-dated building. Dr Cassidy had done everything by hand for forty years.

Elizabeth recalled Dr Cassidy, as she reorganized the files. When she was a child and she had to visit the elderly physician, he would bring her out to the front waiting room when he was through and give her a red lollypop, her favorite flavor. It was the only thing about going to the doctor that she liked.

She wondered if Dr Cullen would approve of handing out candy to the children after their check ups. She made a mental note to ask him about it when she had a moment.

The door chimed bells and Elizabeth looked up. A petite teen with thin arms and legs and spiky, black hair waltzed in. Alice, dressed in a Alexander McQueen mini dress and high boots to her knees, locked eyes with Elizabeth and slowed her pace and dulled her usually perky attitude.

"Hello, how can I help you?" Elizabeth asked. She was a bit stunned at how lovely the girl was, but her open-minded nature made her shrugged it off and accepted Alice's appearance.

"Oh, I was…sent home…from school," Alice explained. Carlisle, in his office poring over a medical text, heard Alice's voice and lifted his head.

It wasn't a lie. Mark, in Alice's gym class, had an unforeseen nosebleed and Alice had to make and excuse that blood made her queasy to get out of class. Her teacher thought she looked a bit pale and ordered her to take the rest of the day off.

"Oh dear. Are you not feeling well?" Elizabeth inquired with real concern for Alice. Carlisle shook his head and grinned at this and waited to hear how this was going to pan out. He knew Alice was in perfect health….for someone who was dead.

"I felt a bit faint in class," Alice lied, "I came to see my father,"

"Oh!" It dawned on Elizabeth now that Alice was one of Carlisle's adopted kids. He had mentioned them to her this morning when she had been in his office telling him the phone call she received was a patient who booked for the afternoon. Carlisle had a photograph of he four children on his office desk. Elizabeth recognized Alice now from that picture. She smiled sympathetically at Alice and said, "Both of the exam rooms are free. Why don't you go lie down in one of them and I will let your father know you are here,"

"Thank you," Alice nodded weakly, acting more dramatic than she really needed to, but she wasn't really sure how human's were when they experienced lightheadedness. She slipped by the desk and slowly, gracefully chose exam room two and took a seat on the table.

Carlisle had heard the whole conversation and waited for Elizabeth to come let him know the news. He put his face down into his book and played ignorant when she knocked on the closed door. "Come in," he said casually. The door opened and Elizabeth stuck her head in.

"Your daughter is here. She was not feeling well so the school sent her to you. She is resting in exam room two,"

"Thank you, Elizabeth," Carlisle graciously said as he closed the text in front of him and stood up. She smiled and nodded before walking away. Carlisle went to see Alice.

"Hey Doc!" Alice greeted Carlisle as he entered and closed the door behind him. She sat on the exam table with her legs kicking merrily and a big grin on her impish face. Her large, amber eyes were bright.

"What seems to be the problem, young lady?" Carlisle played along with Alice's charade, but was fairly sure Elizabeth was back at her desk now.

"I think it is my heart. It has skipped about a million beats!" Alice teased in a low, soft voice. No one could hear through the walls.

"Oh dear. That sounds serious," he said to her. Alice laughed at his choice of words.

"Yeah. I am a bit concerned about it too!" she said mildly. He smiled at her playfulness, but he composed himself and waited for an explanation as to why she really was at his office during school hours. "A guy had a nosebleed in gym class. I made up an excuse to get out of it, but they sent me home," Alice explained, jokes aside.

"Alright. I will call your mother to come get you. Make sure you look ill when you are seen leaving," Carlisle set out the plan.

"Will do!" Alice chirped happily, "Oh," she added before Carlisle could leave to call her mother, "Amanda will be a bit late after school today. She will have detention,"

"Is that so?" Carlisle asked rhetorically. Alice nodded sadly.

"Go easy on her. She is going to have a bad day,"

"I will keep that in mind, thank you," Carlisle responded, unhappy to hear that.

"You might want to get her something to eat too. She forgot a lunch today. She is going to be exhausted upon arrival," Alice informed. She had seen this all from the moment Amanda had woken up late this morning.

Usually Alice only saw the future pertaining to her life and her family's. When she got closer to someone she could, if she concentrated see into his or her futures too, but not as well. Alice felt that her visions of Amanda meant that she would soon get to know the little girl. That is why she was seeing her future so easily.

"Thank you, Alice. I will make sure to run out and pick up something for her then," Carlisle agreed. He was impressed with Alice's caring attitude towards the human girl.

"Great!" Alice gleamed. She loved to be of use. She also admired Carlisle for his compassion for the humans and wanted so badly to take after him in that respect.

"Alice," Carlisle softly said stepping to her and holding her thin shoulders in his hands. He kissed her forehead and then continued, "There is absolutely nothing wrong with your heart. It is right where it ought to be," Alice smiled proudly at her father and he held her hand as she hopped off the exam table.

*

*

*

Alice prediction was right. Amanda had nothing to eat and none of the teachers or students took notice of this fact. She sat alone at lunch and scribbled privately on a scrap paper. Her stomach gurgled as it anticipated food, but Amanda couldn't do anything about it. She breathed through her mouth because Jason's mom had sent him a thermos of hot, steaming soup and the smell was making her insides scream with envy.

Soon afterward, it was time to go outside and she was ushered out of her classroom by the hall monitor. She kicked rocks as she walked along the pavement towards the playground. The middle school had an earlier lunchtime so she wouldn't have Tyler to hang out with at lunchtime anymore. And she was tied up after school for the unforeseeable future so she was not likely going to be spending time with her best friend for while.

She wrapped her arms around her self in a hug to keep warm. There was a sharp breeze. The sky was cloud covered and it looked like it would rain soon.

Afternoon recess seemed to drag on forever Amanda thought. She just wanted to get today over with. She dreaded having to go to Dr Cullen's office after school. She knew what she did yesterday was stupid and wrong, but she hated that she had to work off a debt to him.

It was irrational, but Amanda didn't like Dr Cullen. Not one bit! She thought there was something about him that was eerie and unnatural. The buzz around the school was that he was a hero. Everyone watched her closely and whispered about the accident she had caused, but no one confronted her about it.

The bell rang to go inside. Amanda ran to the school doors to get warm. Once inside she went straight to her class so there would be no chance of her being late.

After another hour had passed by and the day was coming to an end, Amanda began to calm down. It was silent reading and she took out a book from the library about a boy who was going to live forever. It was oddly fascinating. Amanda felt pity for the fictional character; thinking of how terrible it would be not to be able to die. _'Does life have meaning if you live forever?'_ Amanda wondered. She doubted it. In her state of mind, she could think of nothing better than escaping from this world.

_'Does life even have a meaning?' _These were deep thoughts for a little girl._  
_

"Amanda!" Mrs Brightman's voice jerked the girl from her thoughtful trance. She looked up at her teacher who was hanging over her at her desk. Amanda didn't speak.

"Let me see your reading assignment from this morning, please," the teacher demanded. Amanda frowned and did as she was told. She was not worried or fearful or Mrs Brightman's upcoming reaction to her unfinished assignment. She was used to disappointing people. She only begrudged that the class was watching and that she had to be on display.

Amanda slid the worksheet out with the Inuit story and subsequent short answer questions and Mrs Brightman made note that it was still incomplete.

"You can stay after class to finish this, Amanda," was all that the teacher said as she tapped on the paper that only had a few words written on it. Mrs Brightman walked up to the chalkboard and wrote Amanda's name in block letters under a sign that read 'Detention' on it.

"I can't stay. I have to go to work," Amanda defied and a bold tone of voice.

"Excuse me?" the teacher asked, turning back to face the class, her eyes on Amanda.

"I said….I have to be somewhere after school!" Amanda stated firmly.

"Keep pressing and you will stay after class every day this week," Mrs Brightman challenged. Amanda grit her teeth behind her tight lips and keep quiet. Her nails dug into her hands as she held them together in a lock. "Very good. See you after class then," Mrs Brightman said with a triumphant superiority. Amanda felt her whole body shake, but she ignored the urge she had within her to scream out.

That would only make matters worse.

*

*

*

The day had passed swiftly at the clinic. Carlisle called Esme to come pick up their 'sick' child and the three Cullens played out that act beautifully. Elizabeth and Esme had a short meeting, but both women seemed to like each other immediately. Esme could sense that Elizabeth was a loving person and she hoped they could be friends.

For Elizabeth, the connection she made with Esme was one of familiarity. She felt like she knew her from somewhere. As if they were already friends. That was impossible because Esme had never been to Kipta and Elizabeth had never been anywhere but Kipta. Elizabeth summed up this feeling of comfort being in relation to Esme's warm character.

After Esme took Alice home, Carlisle spent time helping the repairmen put in the new window. Elizabeth took a lunch break and picked up a sandwich and some raw veggies from the restaurant across the street.

It was now mid-afternoon and the appointment she had made this morning had arrived. She got the gentleman settled in one of the exam rooms and went to Carlisle's office to inform him.

"Mr Johnson is here for his appointment. He is in room one," Elizabeth told Carlisle as she poked her head in his office to let him know he had a patient waiting.

"Thank you, Elizabeth," he responded and grabbed his stethoscope from his desk and slipped it in his coat pocket.

"Here is his file," she handed a folder to Carlisle as she backed up to let him pass her in the hallway. He smiled and nodded.

Elizabeth turned and went back to her desk. She could hear Dr Cullen's friendly voice greeting the older gentleman in room one. Mr Johnson was an elderly man of eighty-four and he suffered from arthritis and more recently he was having trouble breathing.

As Elizabeth continued her work on computerizing patient files, she noticed that it was starting to spit rain. _'Good thing the window was put in. Just in time,'_ she thought. She noticed a tiny figure jogging up the street adjacent from Main Street. It was Amanda. Elizabeth looked to her wristwatch.

A few moments later Amanda had made it across the street and she hurried inside. She was not soaking wet from the rain, but her jeans were spotted with darker blue specs where the rain had hit her. Her hair, which was mostly straight, waved a tiny bit from the dampness and hung limp in strings.

"You're late, my dear,"

"I know," Amanda said in a low tone. Elizabeth nearly scolded the child, but seeing Amanda sockless, without a coat on or any other belongings in hand, she decided not to. It was clear to her that Amanda was worn out by the circles underlying her sad, almond shaped eyes.

"Well, come on in then," Elizabeth waved Amanda to her. She noted how sallow and tired she appeared and she ushered Amanda to the seat next to her. She was certain that Amanda was not eating well. It was plain as the tone of the child's chalky skin. After she got Amanda sitting she then pulled out the half sandwich she had left over from lunch and the rest of the carrots and dip she hadn't eaten. Elizabeth put the food in front of Amanda, who was confused by the gesture.

"You have a snack first and then I will set you up with some chores," Elizabeth told Amanda without giving her an option. Then she continued on with her work.

Amanda stared at the food in front of her and hesitated._ 'Why is she being so nice?' _she wondered. The sandwich looked amazing. And the smell of the fresh, whole wheat bread made Amanda's mouth run with saliva.

"Go on, eat up. I don't want to have to take leftovers home tonight," Elizabeth ordered in a kind, but firm voice. Amanda didn't care that Elizabeth was trying to nonchalantly give her a healthy meal. She was too hungry to argue and took the fistful of a sandwich in her hands and began to eat.

*

*

*

"I will be right back with some medication for you, Mr Johnson. If you would kindly go back to the lobby, Elizabeth will schedule a follow up for a week from now,"

"Thank you, Dr Cullen," the elderly, yet mobile, old man said as he exited the exam room and headed towards the lobby slowly. Even though he didn't walk as fast as he once used to, Mr Johnson still walked with a spring in his step in spite of his arthritic pain.

Carlisle noticed that Amanda was munching away on some carrots at the front desk, tucked in behind Elizabeth. He smiled because he had not gone to find food for Amanda like he had promised Alice he would do and it was a delight that Elizabeth needed no instruction to pick up on what Alice had seen in her vision.

After filling out instructions and printing them out for Mr Johnson and exiting the upstairs pharmacy he had set up, Carlisle headed to the front. The steroid inhaler was to help with Mr Johnson's Emphysema. He handed a package with the medication and instructions in it, although he had already be through that once with the man during the exam, to the gentleman and shook they shook hands.

Mr Johnson, being one of the elders in town, was sure to spread the word about Dr Cullen being a competent, caring physician. It only took the word of a few satisfied patients to kick the practice into gear.

The man left and Carlisle turned his attention to Amanda, who was finished eating now and feeling full and a bit sluggish as the food stretched her small stomach.

"Amanda, It is nice to see you again. How are you feeling?" Carlisle asked her wanting to check she had no after effects from the crash yesterday.

"Huh?" Amanda grunted, not understanding why he was still being so nice to her. She knew that Elizabeth was being far to kind to her as well, but it didn't bother her as much as it did when the perfect doctor showed her kindness. The respect was new to her.

"I asked you how you were feeling," he repeated, not deterred by the girl's unpleasant attitude.

"I'm fine!" Amanda told him rigidly.

"Don't be rude. Dr Cullen is only asking because he cares about you," Elizabeth sided with Carlisle. This statement only made Amanda fume inside. _'Why should he care?' _she raged internally. She wanted to be left alone. Dr Carlisle's compassion was off putting to what she was used to.

"Whatever," Amanda mumbled under her breath.

"Are you done eating, Amanda?" Elizabeth sighed and paid no attention to the girl's attitude.

"Yeah,"

"Alright then. I want you to collect the garbage from each room and put it into this bag. When you are finished with that come back to me and I will give you another job," she instructed and handed a large, black, plastic bag to Amanda and sternly looked her in the eye to tell her she'd better hop to it. Carlisle stood aside and watched as Elizabeth worked with Amanda.

"You sure you don't have kids of your own?" he asked, impressed by how well Elizabeth had handled the situation. Elizabeth smiled softly in response and sighed.

Amanda had already gone upstairs to do as she was told.

*

*

*

Amanda finished emptying the garbage bins on the upstairs level. She came back down the steps to the main floor, dragging the black bag behind her. It thumped against each step in a slow rhythm. She went into the office at the end of the hall.

When she got inside she realized it was Dr Cullen's office. She felt a bit overwhelmed by the high, built-in bookshelves that lined the walls surrounding the large, mahogany wood desk in the center of the room. The bookshelves were filled with books, ordainments, and a few framed pictures.

Amanda spotted the garbage bin underneath Dr Cullen's desk. She went around the wood structure and got on her hands and knees to crawl under to grab the bin. She dumped the contents into the black bag in hand and then put the bin back in its place.

As she was backing out and standing up she banged her head on the underside of the desk. There was a small crashing noise and she rose from her crouch rubbing her head. The dull pain melted away as she saw what she had knocked over. A four by six, silver picture frame was now face down on the desk.

"Oops," she said sarcastically, feeling like she wanted to create more damage out of spite. She knew that was unwise. A part of her, the less childish part, told her that it was also unjustified. Dr Cullen had not been cruel or unkind to her. He had shown caring and understanding.

Amanda still thought something was not right with the handsome doctor. As she turned the picture back up to its sitting position the pretty people staring back at her stunned her. She leaned in to get a closer look, her mouth hanging open.

Each one was more beautiful than the next. She couldn't decide which of the teenagers was the better looking. _'The blonde girl, maybe…'_ she decided in her head. She was able to close her mouth and recover from the flawless photograph she was witnessing.

'_This must be his family. They are all so perfect to look at. Like he is!' _Amanda made note. She heard footsteps coming from the hallway and backed away from the desk as if she was about to be caught committing a crime. Dr Cullen appeared in the doorway.

'_Something it not right. I just know it. No one is that good. No one is that pleasant or has a perfect family like that!'_ Amanda thought to herself as she stared at Dr Cullen coolly. She walked right by him without saying a word. She had to finish doing the chores so she could leave.

Amanda made a mental decision that she was going to figure out what it was about Dr Cullen that made her so sure he was not as good as he made everyone believe.

* * *

**Review please! I spent the time writing this, you obviously spent the time reading it (if you are at this point)...please drop me a line or two. I always respond by PM. No matter where you are in the story...I like to know what you think. Thank you!  
**


	5. Waterlogged

**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Five**

|Waterlogged|

The first week of school came and went. Amanda was slightly elated that it was the weekend. She had not felt this much happiness over something in a long while.

Not only was there no school, the weekend meant she didn't have to go to the doctor's office. The deal was after school each day for a couple of hours. Amanda's first week working there had been trying. She struggled not to snap insults at the young Dr Cullen, who she placed all her anger on from the accident.

It was irrational to blame him when it had been her fault. She had gotten in the car on her own will and she drove it into his medical practice. Amanda knew she had been lucky not to hurt anyone. Secretly, deep down, she knew _she_ was lucky to not have been hurt, but she was too stubborn to admit that to anyone. Not even herself.

The weekends normally meant that Amanda would hide in her room until she absolutely couldn't hold her bladder any longer. Then she would venture out to the bathroom. By this time, Donna would know that she was awake and start badgering her about how she needed to do better in school, about being an insolent child, and about a lot of other things that Amanda disliked about herself also. Every comment would be a put down.

The good thing about Donna Combs was that besides being neglectful and berating she was also apathetic. Which meant that Amanda could do what she wanted with her free time. Donna would occasionally demand chores to be done, but very rarely. She was lax about the condition of her home and didn't do much more than sit in front of her TV and smoke cigarettes.

Amanda had two days of free time when the weekend came around. There was not a lot of good food to eat in the kitchen of Donna Combs', but Tyler was always thoughtful to that concern.

"You ready?" Tyler yelled out as Amanda ran out the front door of Donna's grungy, split level home and ran toward him. The grass on the lawn was nearly a foot high and filled with weeds. It was clear that Amanda was not the only thing Donna was neglectful of.

"Ya!" Amanda replied as she hurried to him. She noticed his monster-truck lunch bag looped around his neck and shoulder. It was one of those fancy ones that held an icepack in the inside to keep everything cool. Her stomach clenched at the idea of what might be inside. Tyler's mom made him the most amazing lunches. And Tyler, always had more than enough to share.

"I hid some really good sticks out by the ravine. They will make great rods!" Tyler told his best friend as she joined him on the sidewalk. "My dad gave me some hooks and line too!" Tyler added, his face lit with excitement. The two of them were going to go fishing by the lake.

"Great! Cause' the safety pin idea was stupid!" Amanda pointed out, remember the last fishing trip they had been on.

"It seemed like a good plan at the time," Tyler justified his safety pin fishing idea that they had tried out a few weeks ago. The worms kept slipping right off the pin and the fish would get away scot-free. Tyler looked a bit embarrassed that Amanda had insulted their previous fishing expedition. Amanda noticed his frown.

"It was still a fun day," she told him, "Even if we didn't catch anything,"

"Yeah. It was fun, wasn't it?" Tyler asked, already over his pout.

"Ya. This time will be even better, though," Amanda said with uncharacteristic optimism. Tyler smiled widely, thrilled to see a bit of the old Amanda shining through her frumpy, worn out appearance.

Tyler did that to Amanda. He was the only person in her life that she truly liked and wanted to spend her time with. Tyler could make Amanda smile and forget the things that made her sad. He made her feel less crazy. And more willing to stick it through for one more day.

*

*

*

Over at the Cullen residence, the kids were in the garage watching Rosalie work on Emmet's Jeep. Esme was inside the home, putting some personal touches into the upstairs living room. Carlisle was in town at the office, working.

"Pass me the wrench!" Rosalie demanded from under Emmet's gigantic, raised Jeep. It was metallic blue in color and the wheels were so large that the frame sat five feet off the ground. Rosalie had raised the frame another foot today and was tightening the shocks to stabilize the vehicles' off-roading capabilities.

"Wench?" Emmet teased, plucking Alice off the ground from beside him and moving her to Rosalie's outstretched hand.

"Oooo…clever, Em," Alice said short, smacking his hands away from her and throwing herself backward into multiple, back hand springs and then bouncing off the wall and a beam to finally grab onto one of the garage rafters ten feet above them. Emmet grinned and handed his wife the wrench. As playful and sweet as he was, his jokes were not always met with enthusiasm by his family members. Jasper scowled at him harshly for insinuating Alice was less than a lady.

"Come on you guys, I was messing around," Emmet boomed, still smiling, shrugging off his tactless joke.

"Well, don't!" Rosalie sniped and she continued to perfect the Jeep's mechanics.

"Come on, Baby. Cheer up! The new runners for your BMW arrived and you can install them when you are finished with my Jeep," Emmet told her, knowing how her precious cars were like babies to her. She dressed them up, fuel their tanks, changed their oil, and loved them unconditionally.

"I do want to get on those new runners. They are going to look stunning on my M3," Rosalie's voice shifted to a much softer tone as it echoed from under the large Jeep. Alice swung upside down from the long, thin beams supporting the huge garage.

"Esme wants to hunt. I think I will join her," Alice chirped as she swayed from her knees. She swung up and then let go, flipping, and then landing neatly next to Jasper, who was by the door.

"I will come as well, if you don't mind," Jasper inquired, assuming Alice would not mind in the least bit. She took his hand and beamed at his involvement.

"Oh, yes! I knew you would want to come too!" she said with glee.

"I would follow you anywhere, Love. You know that," Jasper whispered softly to Alice, as if she was the only one in the room. He pulled her hand to his mouth and kissed it gently.

"Get a room!" Emmet boomed, staring at the couple in love. It was ironic, seeing as he and Rosalie were the ones who normally put on public displayed of emotion for all to see.

"Emmet!" Rosalie scolded. Jasper and Alice didn't seem to notice. They made there way out the door and headed towards the house, where Esme was just thinking about going hunting and asking Alice to join her.

"We're good, by the way!" Emmet called out sarcastically, "No need to invite us. We've already fed. Thank you for asking, though!"

*

*

*

"Amanda! Wait for me!" Tyler yelled as they ran through the woods along the dirt trail leading to their favorite fishing spot.

"If I ran any slower I'd be walking!" Amanda quipped. She hated to run slow. The feeling of sprinting made her feel at ease somehow. It was so freeing to run fast, all the trees flying passed. Adrenaline pumping her to a more positive state of being.

"My legs are not as long as yours," Tyler complained as he jolted to a stop and put his hands on his knees. He was panting heavily. Amanda stopped too and turned around to wait. She impatiently gawked at him. He pulled his asthma inhaler from his short pocket and took a puff. He put it away again and stood up.

"Ya gonna to be okay there, Ty?" Amanda teased. He jaunted up to where she was standing and gave her a glare and then straightened out the strap of his lunch bag.

"Can we walk a bit now?" he asked.

"Fine," Amanda agreed, heading towards the lake again, Tyler meandering by her side, still having to exert himself to keep her pace.

They reached the lake shortly after and were discouraged to find that the dock they preferred to use was occupied by a couple of middle aged men who were sitting in lawn chairs, fishing rods in their hands, the line reaching out into the water.

"They are taking up the whole end of the dock!" Amanda said, outraged.

"Maybe they won't mind if we join them," Tyler suggested. Amanda sighed and her shoulders fell in disappointment.

"It won't be the same. They will make fun of us," she determined, holding up the long sticks they planned to make fishing rods from.

"Well, maybe we can find a new spot. Look!" Tyler pointed out, his finger inches from Amanda's face. She turned her head to the right in the direction Tyler was fingering towards. There was a dock, far in the distance on the other side of a small bay.

"That will work!" she agreed and took off again.

"I am not sure if we can, though," Tyler said, jogging up beside Amanda.

"Huh?"

"It looks like it is someone's property. That big house is just behind it!" he said.

"Who cares? No one is using it!" Amanda shouted and pulled him by the hand when he stopped to think out trespassing. Tyler was always responsible. His parents were pretty strict with him. They were not sure that Amanda was the best influence on him, but they gave her the benefit of the doubt because of the rough life she had.

"Amanda!" he whined, halting to a stop. She stopped with him and turned to look at him.

"Ty, stop being a baby. It is not like there are any signs telling us not to. It is perfectly legal," she rationalized. Her eyes locked on his and coerced him into going to the vacant dock across the way.

"Alright, fine!" he conceded, "but lets stop and eat first. I'm hungry!" Amanda sighed and let go of his hand. "My mom made peanut butter and jam. Your favorite," he sang, smiling widely. Amanda couldn't help but return the gesture with a small smile of her own.

'_I am lucky to have a friend like Tyler,'_ she decided and followed his lead to a spot under the large willow tree.

Tyler sat first and she knelt down beside him and then sat on her heels. He opened his lunch bag and rummaged through it and pulled out two, paper wrapped sandwiches and handed one to Amanda. She gingerly accepted, feeling that familiar lump of shame clog up her chest. She could never repay him for his kindness.

*

*

*

Esme, Jasper and Alice headed North East to look for game. Alice preferred elk, caribou, moose or deer, as did Esme, but Jasper likes to hunt for mountain lions. The carnivores tasted more like humans. Only slightly, and Jasper missed that taste since he gave up his all human diet back in the fifteies when he met Alice. Now, he only drank the blood of an animal, like the rest of the Cullen clan. Like he had told Alice before they left. He would follow her anywhere.

The trio were able to satisfy everyone's needs by heading North from Babine Lake. If they traveled for a few hours they found a nice place to hunt where no humans lived within a two hundred mile radius. It was all untouched nature.

Jasper was done hunting after finishing off two cougars. He waited patiently as Alice picked just the right caribou for her taste. Out of the large herd she knew that one of them smelt a tiny bit sweeter than the rest and she singled it out.

Jasper enjoyed watching her stalk her prey. Alice was quick and precise. She gracefully took hold of her caribou of choice and daintily sank her teeth into its jugular. In minutes the caribou went limp in her strong, tiny arms. It was eight times larger than she was. The juxtaposition of the two creatures intertwined was an odd thing to witness.

Esme, when done with her third deer, came to stand beside Jasper. She was glowing with happiness as she saw how much love Jasper had for Alice. All of her adopted kids had a special place in her heart. But she truly enjoyed the bond between Alice and Jasper. They didn't parade their feelings for one another on display. Their love was quiet, private, yet Esme could tell how loud and clear it rang to the two of them personally.

"She is quite particular," Esme made conversation with her son as Alice finished up.

"Quite," he answered, a faint, blissful grin on his lips.

"I know what I like!" Alice sang as she bounded elegantly over to join her family. The unrelenting gaze she had with Jasper told what she was thinking. _'And I know who I love. Jasper Whitlock Cullen!' _Alice took his hand.

Alice then lost sight. An all-consuming darkness filled her vision. There were little bubbles frantically swimming around in her eye line and then she saw blurred light. It was Amanda! In the black, heavy water of the lake home in Kipta. She was struggling to keep her head above the water and was too far from the wooden dock to grab a hold of it. She went under and Alice was blinded by pitch black once more.

"Alice! Alice!" Esme cried out with worry. She should have been used to Alice's visions by this point, but normally they didn't last longer than a few seconds. Alice had been catatonic for nearly a half a minute this time.

"What did you see?" Jasper asked. He knew it was something upsetting from Alice's pained face. Her large, yellow eyes were wide with horror.

"I need to call Rose! NOW!" she demanded. Esme was silent, but stayed close in support as Jasper handed Alice the phone from his pocket. She hit the speed dial and there was a ringing on the other end.

*

*

*

"This sucks!" Tyler exclaimed, throwing his hand made fishing rod down on the dock. They had spent a good deal of the morning and early afternoon building their fishing poles with the sticks, wire, and hooks they had brought along. After hours of attempts and the deaths of over a dozen worms, Amanda and Tyler were still less even one fish to show for their efforts.

"Maybe they are afraid because you keep making so much noise!" Amanda scolded, shooting Tyler a stern expression and then pointing to the stick he had just tossed onto the wooden desk.

"Aw, that isn't it!" Tyler said, defeated, "And I have to be home soon. I have to clean up for dinner or my mom will be mad,"

"Fine then, you go. I am going to stay a bit longer," Amanda said plainly. She didn't want to go home until it was nearly dark. She didn't want to spend a second more with Donna than required.

"Do you wanna come for dinner?" Tyler asked softly with hesitation. "My mom is making pot roast," He bit his lip as he waited for Amanda to answer him. He already thought he knew the answer, but he felt like he should offer none-the-less.

"No," Amanda forced herself to say. She would have loved to have a warm, lovingly prepared meal with a real family, but the few times she had accepted Tyler's offer she had felt his parents judgmental eyes on her and it make her feel sick with shame.

"Okay," Tyler barely whispered. He knew why Amanda didn't want to come to his place for dinner and it hurt him, but he let her be stubborn. She had a lot of pride, and he thought that was pretty impressive after all she had gone through.

"Thanks, though," she mumbled.

"Ya. Some other time then," he offered, routinely.

"Tomorrow we should get started on that tree fort," Amanda decided. The two of them had meant to build one in the big willow tree they loved to climb. The same one they ate lunch under today. They had planned on starting on it in the summer, but they never got to to execute.

"Ya!" Tyler agreed, his face shining with excitement, "I will bring my wagon and we can go to the lumber yard and ask for scraps!"

"Sounds good. I saw a package of nails in the drawer in the kitchen. We can use them," Amanda offered.

"And my dad had a hammer we can use!" Tyler thrilled. Amanda gave her best friend a smile to let him know she was excited about seeing him tomorrow too so he would leave without feeling too sorry for her.

"I will come get you when I am ready tomorrow morning, okay?"

"Yep. See you then!" Tyler responded and he picked up his makeshift fishing rod and turned to leave. His jogging footsteps shook the dock slightly. Amanda watched him go and then she focused on the water again.

A half an hour later there was still nothing happening with her line so she pulled it in to exam it. She plucked the last end of the line out from the cold water and held up the empty hook. The worm was gone. Amanda felt discouraged now, like Tyler had and she dropped her rod on the dock with a chunk.

The clouds overhead were turning dark as the afternoon came to an end. She still had not found her coat at home so she only wore her jeans, sneakers, and a baggy sweater. She stood up from her seat position as she decided it was time to give up and head back to town.

She stood too fast and mild dehydration hit her and her head felt like a brick. It tingled slightly from her dizzy spell and she stumbled a bit, her feet unsteady, onto her fishing pole and it rolled from under her foot. Amanda felt her whole body fly back, but had no way to stop it from happening. There was nothing to grab on to. As she fell she screamed in surprise. Her body hit the edge of the dock with a thud and she toppled into the frigid, September water.

All of a sudden she couldn't see. She couldn't think! The water was too dark and too cold. She burst through the surface of the water and gasped in some air. She tried to locate the dock to grab a hold, but she couldn't see it in her panic. She was not a good swimmer. She had never been taught or had lessons.

Amanda kicked her legs relentlessly to keep her head above water, but her jeans and sweat shirt, now soaked, were too heavy and dragged her down. Everything went black as she sunk deeper. Her mind cleared from the panic and she wondered if it was going to hurt.

_'Death'_

Amanda's chest was tight with the pressure of holding her breath. She didn't bother to struggle anymore against the thick, water. She was no longer scared. She waited for the cold to take her over. She only hoped the pain in her chest would stop. And it did. A soft release swept over her and she let her remaining breath of oxygen seep from her lips. The bubbles danced to the surface above her.

Then the darkness consumed her...

*

*

*

"Emmet, would you hold it still, please? For Heaven's sake!" Rosalie barked at her husband as he jerked his head up and down to the music in his iPhone. He had one hand under Rosalie's M3 convertible and was acting at the jack so she could put on her new runners.

His Jeep was finished and standing tall next to her BMW. Emmet's music was so loud he pretended not to hear her, but he stilled his grip on the car anyway. Rosalie rolled her eyes. Then her phone rang from where it sat on the top of her toolbox. She was in the middle of locking the runner boards in place and considered ignoring the call.

However, she recognized the ring. It was Jasper's phone and that could only mean one thing….Alice! Alice had her own phone, but usually borrowed Jasper's since they were always together anyway. He only had it with him for Alice's use and in case of emergency.

Begrudgingly, Rosalie scooted her self to her took box and picked up her sparkly, red phone. As she pushed the button to accept the call and put the phone to her ear, she heard Alice's muffled voice shouting orders at her.

"Ro-, you have to – lake! It is – fallen- HURRY!" was all that Rosalie could make out from the dodging reception she was getting. Alice was still hours away in the wilderness and the connection was very poor.

"I can't hear you, Alice. What do you want?" Rosalie said loudly and clearly into her phone. She waited for Alice to try again. The other end was fuzzy. Emmet was oblivious to the phone call. He took his free moment from holding up the car to bounce around and head bang to his heavy metal music.

"Lake! She- the lake. You must- else- TOO LATE!" Alice's voice blipped through the phone to Rosalie's ears. Then the phone went dead. Rose hung up and stared at it.

"That was weird," she mumbled. But she always thought Alice was an oddball. So she shrugged it off and put her phone down. She knelt down by her car to continue and then a faint, but high-pitched shriek, made her head twitch up.

"Emmet! Did you hear that?" she asked quickly as she stood up. Emmet was still bouncing around with his earpieces in. He gave Rosalie a goof grin, but she reached out in disapproval and pulled on his iPhone cord so his ears were clear. The scratching of the music was still audible.

"Emmet, turn that off and listen," she demanded. He obeyed and did as she asked. They waited in dead silence. Rosalie was sure she heard a child scream out.

"I don't hear-," Emmet began, but Rosalie covered his mouth and they both heard it. The splashing of water, the gasping breathes. Rosalie knew what Alice wanted now.

"The lake!" she said and instinctively sprang into action.

Without questioning Alice's motives or why she herself was participating in this act, she took off out the garage and raced to the lake. Emmet was left behind, in a state of confusion.

*

*

*

Amanda didn't know how she got from under the water to back onto the dock. Her last memory was of the bubbles that escaped her and sent her into a peaceful oblivion. Her present state was that of coughing, choking, and spitting up of the water that had made it's way into her chest. She could only hear the wheezing, sputtering of her own body as hands held her securely.

"Is she alright now?" Emmet asked Rosalie, who was dripping wet as well, holding Amanda on her side so the water would not go back down into her lungs as she coughed it out. Amanda was not aware of the two beautiful people that stood over her now. She was still only focusing on ridding the rasp from her tight chest.

"I think so, but you should call Dad. He will want to make sure," Rosalie instructed Emmet, who nodded and pulled out his iPhone to do so.

Amanda's coughing subsided for the most part. Rosalie gathered her up into her arms and hurried the child back to the house. A few occasional coughs barked out from Amanda, but the water was now mostly gone from within her.

Amanda felt she was being carried. The reality was coming back to her now and she clung onto the body that held her gently. The most wonderful smell wafted up her nose as she took in her first clean breaths of air. She was lowered and placed on a white surface and instead of laying put; Amanda sat up to try to catch a glimpse of her rescuer. The figure moved too fast.

"Get me one of your jacket's Emmet," Rosalie's stunning voice rang out.

Amanda was surprised at how graceful and musical it was. A big spread of fabric was wrapped around her and she was grateful. Her teeth were chattering together and she body shivered so violently it hurt. She was able to take in her surroundings, however.

The inside of the house was clean, bright, and everything was in its place. There was not one piece of clutter and each item in the room seemed to have a purpose and fit in with the décor perfectly. Amanda shivered as she scanned the room. It was mansion. Finer than anywhere she had ever been before.

If she hadn't been so cold and uncomfortable she would have assumed it was Heaven. For the blonde girl sitting beside her on the white sofa was the most beautiful being Amanda had ever laid eyes on. Rosalie, in wet clothing and her long locks of hair, twisted with water, still looked like a Goddess.

"Whoa!" Amanda blurted out as she really got a good look at Rosalie. Emmet grinned and leaned against the side of the couch. He loved others reaction to their family, especially to his glorious mate. Rosalie smiled at Amanda; glad the child was okay, but not sure if she was happy about her involvement.

Amanda noticed a fire cracking beside her in the large, glass-incased fireplace. The warmth reached out to her and she felt a hundred times better. Her body was more relaxed and her teeth were no longer clicking against each other.

"You okay, kid?" Emmet asked. Amanda turned to see him for the first time. Her eyes widened. Emmet grinned without showing teeth.

"You. Are. Humongous!" Amanda said, not being about to withhold her true interpretation on Emmet. She felt rude staring, but Emmet was the biggest male she had ever seen. He was only a teen, she could tell, but he was more muscular than any male she had ever laid eyes on.

"He's harmless," Rosalie offered Amanda some reassurance. Most people were frightened by her husband's brute.

"Ooh-kay," Amanda broke her response in two droned out syllables, not sure if she could trust the stunning blonde girl. The two vampires chuckled.

"Do you feel alright?" Rosalie asked, not sure what to do with someone who had nearly drowned. She'd never studied medicine, even though it was somewhat intriguing to her.

"Ya," Amanda answered, not aware of how close she came to drowning.

Rosalie sighed with some relief. Amanda appeared to be just fine. Surely, if she had been a few minutes longer getting to Amanda she would not have been successful in her revival. When she had pulled Amanda from the water the little girl was not breathing. Amanda's heart was still attempting to delivery blood to her brain, but it would have given up eventually if Rosalie had not of given Amanda that one breath to jolt her brain into action again. Her lungs began to function immediately afterwards.

Amanda was a bit shy as she sat in front of these two perfect strangers. She felt like a wet rat compared to Rosalie who looked perfect, only wet. The water almost made her more beautiful. _'Glittery, almost,'_ Amanda noticed. She was not shivering anymore. She was about to get up to leave when she heard a door open and then shut loudly. There were no footsteps to be heard, but suddenly Dr Cullen appeared in her sight.

Carlisle was at Amanda's side in seconds, placing his black bag next to her on the sofa.

"Oh my God! It's you!" Amanda blurted out rudely. She couldn't believe that she had to deal with him again. He appeared out of nowhere. _'Why me?' _She wondered childishly, not seeing how lucky she truly was to be alive._  
_

"How long was she under the water?" he asked Rosalie, concern visible in his stone face.

"I am not sure. She was already submerged when I got to her. It could not have been long. I got to her pretty fast," she said. Amanda thought she picked up on something private by the tone of Rosalie's voice when she said she had gotten to her swiftly. And thinking about it now, Amanda had not seen anyone nearby when she was getting up to leave the dock.

_'How did she even know I had fallen in?'_ she wondered.

Carlisle had heard on the phone from Emmet that Amanda had not been breathing when she was first pulled from the water. He didn't want to frighten Amanda by bringing this fact up. He was grateful that Rosalie had picked up a thing or two from her many years spent along side him.

Rosalie had never said so much out loud, but she showed some interest in medicine. If it were not for the bloodlust, Rosalie might have given more thought into a medical career. However, her young appearance, changed at only sixteen years of age, made it nearly impossible for her to find a career that would accept her in today's society.

Carlisle reached into his bag to pull out some of his diagnostic tools. Amanda was not pleased and didn't want to be poked and prodded. She wiggled free from Emmet's jacket that was draped snugly around her tiny frame.

"Amanda, how are you? Do you feel pain anywhere?" he asked her, not paying heed to her attempt to escape him.

Then it dawned on Amanda the reason Dr Cullen had come to her so quickly. _'This is his house! Of course! The big house by the lake that Tyler told me about,'_ The blonde girl was the same one from the photograph on his office desk. And Amanda hadn't recognized Emmet until now either because he was much larger as he stood before her.

"I have to go now," Amanda stated and struggled to get up, but Rosalie was on one side of her and Carlisle was right in front her with his stethoscope out, urgently wanting a better listen to Amanda's wet lungs to see if any damaged had been caused. Amanda waved him away as he got near her with the bell in hand, annoyed at the attention she was getting. She knew she was fine. This was nothing compared to other things she had been through.

"Not just yet, my dear. Please cooperate with me," he ordered calmly, hoping Amanda would see reason and allow him to examine her. Amanda was not that reasonable. She resented his care and didn't like how determined he was to help her. She tried to get up again. Rosalie intervened and took Amanda's hand to hold her from leaving.

"Just sit still and let him check you over. He won't hurt you,"

"I am not afraid of him!" Amanda snapped at Rosalie, who didn't understand the girl's aversion to the doctor. Amanda saw that it was no use to fight this. She would not be able to win this one either. It was the story of her life. So she flopped back down and glared ahead as Carlisle listened to her chest.

*

*

*

After several minutes, Carlisle put his tools away in his bag. He was finished with his exam. Amanda's vitals were good and her heart and lungs were functioning well.

Rosalie was surprised at her relief over the girls health status. She was not generally so concerned with a human's well being. She assumed she was feeling this way since she had been the one who rescued Amanda.

"I really have to go now!" Amanda stated again. She had said the same thing a number of times during Carlisle's exam, but she had been ignored. Her health had taken priority. But now that she was in the clear, there was no reason to hold her.

"I will drive you home," Carlisle gently told her. Amanda was already standing and she squinted at him in annoyance.

"I will walk!" she told him forcefully and headed out of the room in the wrong direction. Emmet chuckled at the girl's fierceness.

"The way to the front door is to the right and down the hall," Carlisle called after her, smiling and shaking his head in amusement. She grunted and made the necessary changes in her direction.

"What a brat!" Rosalie muttered as Amanda left, slamming the front door behind her. Emmet grinned.

"I like her!" he exclaimed sincerely. Rosalie smacked the back of his head.

Carlisle left Rosalie and Emmet and walked out to the driveway to watch Amanda storm off in a huff. Her hands made fists at her side and she briskly headed towards town in an angered stride. He was not sure why Amanda didn't like him very well, but he assumed it was misplaced anger. He was right about that. Yet, something about Amanda was giving him the strong sense that she needed him to care for her.

Alice, Esme, and Jasper appeared from the trees. Alice zipped to Carlisle's side.

"She's not hurt is she?" Alice asked, noting the worry on his face. Esme came to his other side and took his hand lovingly.

"No, she got lucky again," he announced, watching Amanda's figure get further away and then it disappeared around a bend.

"She will make it home safe," Alice reassured him. He nodded and thanked her. "I can follow her to be sure, though," the tiny, optimistic vampire said.

"Thank you, Alice. Be careful not to be seen,"

"I will stay back. She won't even know I am there," Alice chirped and she scurried off down the road after Amanda. She looked like a ballerina as she skipped along. Her arms and hands flowed around her and she swirled a few times. Esme let out a puff of air and leaned into her husband.

"Alice is sure something!"

"Yes. She is," he replied, his mind still swirling over Amanda's strange appeal to him. He felt like she was special in some way. There was a connection to her, but he couldn't put his finger on it.

"Mmmm," Esme hummed and she leaned in closer to Carlisle and took in a deep breath. His scent was different somehow. She didn't know what the difference was, but it was refreshing and uplifting. Carlisle knew what Esme was sensing. It was the same feeling he had the first time he caught Amanda's scent too.

The essence was one that made Esme's still heart heavy with nostalgia. She had smelled it before somewhere.

* * *

**Please Review!**

**It pleases me so much! :) **


	6. Rainy Days & Mondays

**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Six**

|Rainy Days and Mondays|

It was the early hours of Monday morning. Alice was feeling a bit down, which was unusual for the upbeat vampire who normally needed no help perking herself up. She was still hooked up on Amanda. Since she could not sleep to avoid her problems she was forced to sit and reminisce over them.

After the events of Saturday, and watching Amanda get home safely, Alice had taken a peek inside Amanda's bedroom and was shocked at the living conditions. She had the strongest urge to sneak in the window when Amanda was sleeping and redecorate and stock her drawers with new cloths.

A midnight visit would surly arouse some sort of chaos and Amanda would no doubt be accused of theft, so Alice had to use all her will to back away and do nothing. It bothered her, though. Alice noticed how there were no dolls or special knick-knacks lying around. It was not what she imagined a little girl's room to look like.

Now, at home with her parent's and siblings, Alice gazed off into the distance as she thought about how she might be able to help Amanda. She was lost in her thoughts. So much so, that when Rosalie asked her for an opinion on a new outfit, Alice didn't respond.

"Alice?" Esme questioned softly, placing a hand on her daughter's shoulder. Alice sighed and jolted out of her daydream. "Is everything alright, dear?"

"I don't know," Alice wistfully murmured. Jasper, already by her side, wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her into him. Esme let her hand slide down Alice's arm and she squeezed her hand in support.

"Is the future not as bright as you hope for?" Esme inquired, thinking that Alice might have seen something coming that she was not pleased to see. Alice sighed and tried to put on her happy face. She was being so depressing and she didn't like that it was worrying her family now. It was out of character for Alice.

"The future is not the problem," her voice sang sweetly. She gave a small smile. Jasper watched her carefully, knowing that her smile didn't match her true feelings.

"It is that girl again, isn't it?" he asked gently. Alice hesitated, seeing Rosalie's face turn hard at the mention of Amanda's name. Rosalie thought it was best to stay as far away from Amanda as possible and let Carlisle deal with her.

"I am not sure why I feel so protective of her, but after seeing her in my visions a few times now, I can't get her out of my mind," Alice explained, feeling good to get it off her chest.

"Your father is keeping an eye on her, Alice. She will be fine," Esme reassured her daughter. Esme had not met Amanda yet, but from the stories she had heard from her family she knew Amanda's was a sad case. She wished she could help the girl as well, but it was out of her hands.

"I wish there was someway to help her," Alice thought out loud.

"It is unsafe to get involved," Rosalie said crisply.

"You should have seen her room, Rose!" Alice burst out passionately, "It was just awful,"

"Not everyone has a lot of money, Alice. She isn't the first child to not have fancy things. She will survive!" Rosalie argued back at Alice.

"It is not just the material things. You saw her! She is a wreck!"

"Perhaps, we could casually donate some new clothing to her through the office. As payment for her working there," Esme offered a suggestion, looking over to Carlisle who was reading at the table, but listening in to the conversation as well.

"I would love to, but I doubt she would accept. She is very proud," he explained.

"She's a little spitfire! You should have seen her after near death…she bounced back so fast! Oh, geeez…and the look she gave to Pops here, it was pure evil!" Emmet belted out his take on Amanda, glancing over to Esme. Rosalie glared at him for interfering.

"Emmet!" Carlisle scolded his rambunctious son for his lack of tact.

"What? It is true. She does not like you very much, does she?" Emmet continued, not seeing what he had said wrong.

"I won't argue with that assessment," Carlisle agreed somberly. He sighed and shook his head lightly and then went back to his reading. The room fell silent and Esme took a seat next to Alice and Jasper and tried to imagine this little girl that had reached her family in such a strong way.

*

*

*

Amanda heard Donna coughing loudly from across the hall as the light began to come through her bedroom window. Amanda took a long glare at the small hole to the outside, covered with dirty glass. She could have sworn that she had seen a face staring at her the night before last. She knew it must be her imagination, but it still creeped her out.

The rain was hitting the roof in a steady pattern. The leak in the roof sent a stream of water down the wall into a towel that was placed on the floor to soak up the wetness. Amanda shivered as she rolled over. It was starting to get chilly in Kipta. The summer was definitely over.

Amanda heard Donna's newest boyfriend snore in his sleep and she saw no point in trying to get more rest now that she was awake. The new guy was named Bobby and he was one of the slimiest men Amanda had ever met. He only wanted one thing from Donna and Amanda didn't want to think about those details. She had heard enough last night when she tried to plug her ears and hum the violent noises out of her mind.

Amanda decided she would just get up and ready herself for school early so she might miss seeing her foster parent and her latest man. They were asleep and not using the bathroom so Amanda poured a few inches of water in the tub and took a short bath. She was careful not to use too much hot water so Donna wouldn't have a reason to be upset with her.

When she was done bathing and washing her long, tangled hair, she got dressed in some clean cloths. Since the weather had turned ugly on Sunday, she and Tyler never got to build their tree house and she spent a few hours while Donna was out of the house doing a load of her laundry.

She had never been taught how to separate loads, so Amanda would throw all her things into the washer with some detergent and hit whatever button would make the machine start. It usually worked out and the cloths got clean. A few times she changed her clothing a soft pink, but she couldn't afford be to picky. As long as they were clean. That is what mattered.

Dressing in her holey jeans, pale pink socks, and a faded grey cotton t-shirt because her sweater was not dry yet from the wash, Amanda quietly snuck out of the house. The rain was not so heavy so she didn't mind not having a coat with her. She still couldn't find her only one. She assumed it was mixed up in the piles of junk lying around the living room of Donna's house, but was not thrilled to go searching through them to try to find it.

When she arrived at the school, she was one of the first students to arrive. Her classroom was open and empty so she took a seat at her desk and waited. Her stomach reminded her that she had rushed out of the house before eating breakfast. All she had with her was an apple she had grabbed from the fridge on her way out the door. Amanda decided it was best to save the apple for lunch.

She saw a pencil on the floor beside her desk and picked it up. It was a regular, yellow coated, HB pencil with no name on it. Amanda shrugged and put it in her desk. She only had a few school supplies so she was pleased to find a new pencil to use.

*

*

*

"Mrs Fromms is in exam room one," Elizabeth told Carlisle as she met him in the hallway. The practice was picking up. Word had spread that the new doctor was here and the ailments all seemed to come out of the woodwork again. Elizabeth was booking up the days quite successfully now.

"Thank you, Elizabeth," he replied with a smile. She had not spoken with him this morning because she had been on the phone with Mrs Fromms, so she had not been able to ask him about Amanda's near drowning. Elizabeth was anxious to hear the details.

On Saturday, as they were closing up for the day, Carlisle had gotten the call from his teenage kids who found Amanda in the lake. Elizabeth knew she had not drown because the boy on the other end of the line said as much, but she was still itching to learn how Amanda was now.

After forty minutes, and a very thorough visit with Mrs Fromms, Dr Carlisle Cullen was able to convince the middle-aged hypochondriac she did not have Anthrax and she didn't need a vaccine against to ward against it. The worried woman was relived, but she was still planning on going home to clean her house from top to bottom with bleach in case the rabbit's foot her grandson had brought over on the weekend was really an infected hide.

"Thanks again, Dr Cullen," Mrs Fromms said gratefully, but with wary still in her tone of voice. She made an awkward turn to leave, as if she might have more concerns to address with Dr Cullen, but was deciding against it. He smiled and waved to her as she left. Elizabeth was bursting with a smile that she couldn't help release. She had spent the morning on the phone with the woman so she knew already what Carlisle had to deal with.

"You must have the patience of a saint!" she told him as soon as the coast was clear and Mrs Fromms was already crossing Main Street in plain sight.

"I do my best," Carlisle responded humbly. Elizabeth took this window of time to ask him about Amanda, not sure if it was her place to do so.

"How is Amanda?" she asked, point blank. Carlisle glanced up from Mrs Fromms chart he had been writing in. He smiled.

"She recovered well. No signs of any permanent damage," he told Elizabeth.

"That is good. I was just so terribly worried when you rushed home the other day," she heaved a sigh as she heard the good news.

"It was a close call," he agreed.

"It is fortunate your daughter was home and saw her fall in the water," Elizabeth continued to talk about it to help comfort her own anxiety over the accident.

"Yes. I am very proud of her," he agreed with his assistant again. He was, in truth, thinking about both Alice and Rosalie for their joint effort in rescuing Amanda that day.

"That child sure has a knack for getting into trouble," Elizabeth blurted out. She caught herself and sighed, feeling a bit guilty to think that way, but it seemed to her that Amanda had no sense of self-preservation.

"She certainly does," Carlisle replied, nodding his head. Elizabeth grinned awkwardly as he agreed with her assessments. She decided to drop the topic.

"Mmm!" she hummed, remember she had to tell him something as she turned to the computer screen to get her facts straight before speaking. "Your schedule has changed slightly. Your one o'clock appointment was moved to three o'clock,"

"No problem, that is just fine," Carlisle said and they both smiled in recognition that their conversation was over and they both went back to their separate work.

*

*

*

Amanda's school day was coming to an end and Mrs Brightman had put up some new spelling words on the board for the class to write down. Amanda didn't mind spelling. She had a fairly good memory and if she wasn't distracted when she wrote the words in her notebook the first time Amanda could remember them again on Friday when they had their spelling test.

"Hey! That's my pencil!" Stacy yelled out as she walked by Amanda's desk. She yanked the yellow pencil out of Amanda's hand before she had a chance to know what Stacy was talking about. She looked up and saw the other students now staring at her.

"I found it on the ground," Amanda explained, stunned at the attention Stacy had drawn to her side of the classroom.

"What seems to be the problem, ladies?" Mrs Brightman questioned as she left another student's desk and walked over to Amanda's.

"She stole my pencil!" Stacy accused. Amanda's mouth dropped open in disgust.

"No I didn't!" she yelled back at Stacy.

"You did so, Liar! It was in my desk this morning!" Stacy shouted back viciously.

"It was on the floor right there so I picked it up!" Amanda explained to the teacher, pointing to the ground beneath her.

"You were the first in here this morning, you must have gone into my desk and took it when no one was around," Stacy accused.

"I did not!" Amanda shouted out and stood up roughly to stand as tall as Stacy.

"Girls, enough!" Mrs Brightman demanded. She softened her expression and then turned her face down toward Amanda, who was sure the teacher had come to her aid. "Stacy, you can go back to your seat now…and Amanda, please stay after class,"

"WHAT?" Amanda blurted out, not believing what she was hearing, "I didn't do anything wrong!"

"Don't make a scene or you will have to go explain all this to the principal. I won't tolerate any outbursts in my classroom," Mrs Brightman said calmly and she tapped on Amanda's desk patronizingly before going back to check student's notebooks.

"But I…" Amanda attempted to explain her side again, not sure what else to say. She had already told the truth.

"Take your seat, Amanda," Mrs Brightman ordered.

Amanda clenched her teeth and dropped to her seat. She felt hot inside, like she was boiling.

A few minutes later the bell rang and Amanda stayed at her desk as the other students gathered up their belongings and headed out the doors to go home. Amanda watched Mrs Brightman continue to tidy her desk and write a few things down on the board for tomorrow's class. It seemed, to Amanda, that Mrs Brightman was ignoring her.

"Can I go now?" Amanda asked bluntly. Mrs Brightman pivoted her body around and peered at Amanda over her glasses. "Please," Amanda added for good measure.

"I can't prove you took that pencil from Stacy's desk," Mrs Brightman said calmly, putting down her marker and walking a few steps closer to the accused. "However, you do know the difference between right and wrong, don't you, Amanda?"

"I do not steal!" Amanda said forcefully. She knew that was a tiny lie since she did take a dollar or two from Donna every once and a while, but that was in self-preservation generally. She usually used that money for nourishment.

"Like I said, I can't prove you stole the pencil," Mrs Brightman repeated sourly, "I realize you have not had a very good year, Amanda, but you have to rise above that and not let yourself fall into a trap of jealousy and hatred towards others. I know you and Stacy are not close, but she is not to blame for what you are going through,"

Amanda fought back tears from the accusation. Mrs Brightman's last words echoed in her head. 

_'What you are going through....'_

_'You mean my mother killing herself!' _Amanda's mind screamed making her shiver as she recalled that horrible day.

Sure, she hated Stacy. And deep down Amanda was jealous of her. Stacy had everything. Parents who loved her, all the nicest clothes and toys, and she was the most popular girl in her grade. But Amanda couldn't believe that she was being accused of stealing from her. She would never slump that low or give Stacy that power over her. _'Never!'_ She would have rather die than take anything from Stacy Peterson.

Mrs Brightman was still prattling away as Amanda stewed in her seat. She glared up at her teacher and caught the tail end of what was a suggestion, not a request. "Perhaps you will own up to this and apologize to Stacy tomorrow for your mistake?"

"Never!" Amanda coldly spoke in a low, angered tone. She stood up and began for the door. Mrs Brightman sighed and shook her head, thinking she had Amanda pegged, but had no idea how wrong she was.

Or how much she had hurt the fragile little girl by not believing in her.

*

*

*

It was only a short distance from the school to the medical building, but Amanda ran fast. When she was running she felt in control. However, she reached Main Street and as she stopped to look both ways for vehicles she began to fall apart. She could feel the pit in her stomach rise and an ache start in her chest as she crossed the street.

By the time Amanda was to the other side she was gasping for air. She couldn't stop herself from sobbing this time. Large tears poured out from her eyes and she began to hyperventilate. There was no one out on the sidewalks as it rained lightly. She was alone.

Amanda, determined no one would see her crying, hurried around to the parking lot of the building and sat down on a curb, hidden by Elizabeth's red Firefly. It still looked like a rust bucket, but the front of the car was a lot newer looking since it had been repaired. Amanda's sobs were silent, but the tears got away from her again as she remembered how she had tried to run away by taking the red car for a joy ride.

"Hello!" a happy voice rang out. Amanda was startled by it. She thought she was alone. When she turned around there was a petite girl with black hair, pale skin and a smile on her face sitting on the fire escape about ten feet away. Amanda recognized her from Dr Cullen's photograph. She was one of his other kids. Amanda thought she must be the youngest because she was sure tiny compared to the rest of his kids.

Alice had seen the theft accusation scenario happening after Amanda had chosen to pick up the pencil this morning before class. She foresaw how upset the girl would get and told her siblings to go on home without her this afternoon. Besides Jasper, she didn't tell them what she was up to. They would not approve. And by they, she thought Rosalie.

Alice had foreseen Amanda break down and cry on her way home from school. Then, after Amanda had sat in the parking lot for a while, she was going to make a poor decision and run off to the willow tree to be alone and skip work all together. There was a storm coming. Alice saw the outcome of this play out poorly for Amanda. The rain was going to make the tree slippery and Amanda was going to fall from the tree and break her arm.

Thus, Alice was going to try to change Amanda's future by interfering with the present. And hopefully save the girl from a broken limb.

So Alice had waited on the fire escape for Amanda to arrive from school. She had been slightly wrong about the curb Amanda would choose to sit on, but other than that she had been correct. She hopped down from the fire escape stairs she had been resting on and pranced over to Amanda and sat down beside her.

"Right on time!" Alice exclaimed, unfolding an umbrella and letting it fan out above their heads. The rain tapped softly on the fabric above both their heads now.

Amanda was too interested in the strange teen to think about her troubles any more. She wiped her wet face with her sleeve and then stared back at Alice, blinking a few times. She thought it was odd how close Alice was to her, but wasn't sure how to react.

"Why are you crying?" Alice asked, already knowing the cause, but she knew that it was not all about a pencil and the accusation of theft. Amanda had a lot of fears bottled up inside that she rarely addressed.

"None - of - your bus-iness," Amanda mumbled, stumbling over her words as her breath recovered from her once violent gasps.

"Was someone mean to you?" Alice inquired, her voice always upbeat. She was trying to cheer up a child, after all. Amanda's eyes narrowed, but only for a second. Alice had her pegged.

"Kinda," Amanda conceded a response. She was having trouble looking at Alice's face directly. It was partly embarrassment because she had been caught crying, but she was also aware of how perfect Alice was. Like all the other Cullens Amanda had already met.

"Girls can be mean sometimes," Alice offered her take on the subject. She knew that too well of how it felt to not fit in. It bounced of her a lot easier though. She was a vampire so she understood the wariness others felt towards her.

"Ya," was all that Amanda knew to say.

"Tell me what happened," Alice probed. Amanda looked up once more in confusion at Alice's unusually bright looking face.

"I don't even know you!" Amanda pointed out harshly, giving Alice a hard look. She was not crying anymore, but she felt drained from the exertion it had put on her body. Her eyes stung and her head throbbed.

"I'm Alice!"

"Great! Thanks for clearing that up!" Amanda replied sarcastically, her voice trembling. _'That explains why you are so nosy, for sure!'_ She thought, the sarcasm still present even in her mind. Then she dropped her head down and glanced at her hands resting in her lap.

"You know…None of the girls at my school like me very well. They think I am weird!" Alice sang cheerfully, her tone contradicting her sad tale.

"You are weird!" Amanda blurted out rudely, feeling a bit sorry as soon as she did. Alice was only trying to be nice.

"Well, sure…but that is not a good reason for anyone to be teased or laughed at or…accused of theft,"

Amanda's head shot up! "Who told you that?" she demanded from Alice, who was getting what she wanted out of Amanda. "I didn't steal the pencil!"

"What pencil?" Alice asked innocently as if she was in the dark about the matter.

"Nothing. I just didn't steal it, okay?!" Amanda belted, her voice cracking.

"Okay. If you say you didn't take a pencil than I believe you," Alice offered and smiled positively at Amanda.

"I don't steal!" Amanda repeated strongly.

"Well, not unless you don't count grand theft auto," Alice pointed out, tapping the hood of the red Firefly parked next to them. And then she giggled. Amanda wasn't sure why, but she cracked a smile too. It was funny the way Alice had put it.

"I was just….I dunno," Amanda didn't know what to say. She hadn't thought of it before, but Alice was right. She had stolen the car.

"You were running away," Alice finished off Amanda's thought. Amanda cringed. "You know that you can't run forever, right? You have to stop and face things or they will follow you,"

There was a long moment of silence and Amanda sighed. She was a touch annoyed that Alice was interfering, but was aware that the teen was right. Being told these truths by Alice didn't upset her the way it would have if it were someone else. Amanda didn't stop to think about the reason why that was the case, but she nodded at Alice's words regardless.

"It is really chilly out here, don't you think?" Alice asked merrily, changing the topic. She stood up and held out her hand to Amanda. "Let's go inside, okay?"

Alice beamed a brilliant smile of white teeth at Amanda, who was intrigued by the gesture instead of scared by it. She took Alice's hand and stood up. Amanda barley noticed how cold Alice's hand was in her own hand. She didn't care either that Alice was slightly odd. There was something about the pixie girl that Amanda was drawn to.

*

*

*

"Amanda, you finally made it!" Elizabeth exclaimed as Alice and Amanda came in through the front doors of the building. Alice shook out the umbrella and put it away swiftly as she entered. Amanda clicked her tongue on the roof of her mouth.

"Nice to see you again, Alice," Elizabeth offered a greeting to Carlisle's youngest child as well.

"Hi, Liz! I am so pleased to see you again too! Oooo, and I love you Chanel purse!" Alice cooed, noticing the black bag tucked in the corner beside Elizabeth's desk.

"Thanks," Elizabeth replied gratefully, although a little surprised at Alice's outgoing cheerfulness. She smiled and turned back her attention to Amanda.

"I was worried about you," Elizabeth told her as she walked up to the front desk and stood beside it. "And look at you! No coat! It is the middle of September! You should be wearing a coat everyday now,"

"I couldn't find it," Amanda explained, feeling strangely open to sharing things at this time. Elizabeth nodded and forced a smile, gulping back a lump in her throat. She didn't want to be too harsh with Amanda.

"Here Mandi, take my jacket! I have an extra sweater in my bag I can wear," Alice offered and took off her designer, Marc Jacob's Blazer in soft beige and gold to hand it to Amanda, who was taken back by Alice's casual use of her nickname. Tyler was the only one who called her Mandi.

"I can't take your jacket," Amanda pushed it away, "People will think I stole it!"

Elizabeth stayed silent and let Alice handle Amanda. She was not aware of what had happened to Amanda in class today.

"You can borrow it for a while! If anyone gives you a hard time you just tell me and I will deal with them, okay?" Alice insisted and turned Amanda around and began to dress her in the jacket, one arm at a time. Amanda let it happen, not sure how to react to Alice's strange, yet generous offer.

Dr Cullen came out of one of the exam rooms with a little girl of about five years of age and her mother in tow behind him. The child had a grin on her face and a red lollypop in her tiny fist. Elizabeth beamed as she noticed this. She had forgot to mention the lollypop idea to Carlisle, but as she was finding out more and more, she rarely need to make suggestions to him. Carlisle seemed to be one step ahead of her every time.

"It was nice to meet you, Krissy," He told the young child as the mother picked her daughter up into her arms.

"Can you say thank you to Dr Cullen?" the mother encouraged her little girl to speak. Carlisle waited. He had won Krissy over with the lollypop at the end of her check up, but she was too shy to speak for herself without her mother's guidance.

"Thank you," she softly murmured.

"You are very welcome,"

"Thank you, Dr Cullen," the mother added and she made her way out the door. There was a silence as the four remaining people in the room all noticed each other. Amanda was busy looking down at the stylish jacket she had on. She grabbed the front and put it to her nose and inhaled deeply.

"This smells like candy!" Amanda's voice broke the quiet.

Carlisle smiled over to Alice as she giggled at Amanda's observation. A vampire's scent was meant to lure in their prey. Only, it was funny in this context because Alice was quite harmless. She had never tasted human blood.

"It looks good on you," Elizabeth complimented Amanda kindly, appreciating Alice's kindness. She chalked it up to Carlisle and Esme's great parenting. His kids appeared to be just as immaculate like he and his wife seemed to be.

"Are you sure I can borrow it? If feels expensive," Amanda questioned Alice, one eyebrow raised. She stroked the soft material of the jacket that was too big for her, but not by much. The sleeves were three-quarter length so they actually fit her perfectly. The body was a bit baggy and past her bum, but it was not too bad of a fit.

"Of course. I don't need it," Alice brushed it off like it was nothing. Carlisle grinned and thought of the huge closet at home in Alice and Jasper's bedroom that was filled with so many clothes that Alice was running out of space to store things.

"Cool!" Amanda said softly, and a faint smile appeared on her lips. Everyone in the room was stunned by her response. Elizabeth noted how much more lovely Amanda appeared with a smile on her face. This was the first time she had seen her smile.

"Perhaps you should take the day off today, Amanda," Elizabeth suggested turning to Carlisle for his approval. "Head home now. There is a storm coming in," Elizabeth continued to explain her reasoning. The clouds outside were almost black and it was starting to rain more profusely. Amanda looked over to Carlisle for approval as well.

"Yes, I agree. You can go home now, if you wish. If you'd like a ride, Elizabeth can take you now or I can when I am finished for the day," he told Amanda kindly.

"No, I can walk," Amanda replied. She didn't see the point in getting a ride when Birch Street was only a few blocks away. She already attracted enough attention for one day.

"Nice meeting you, Amanda," Alice said cheerfully with the same pleasant grin plastered on her flawless face.

"Ya," Amanda answered uncertainly as she headed to the door. She turned as she exited and included, "Thanks for the coat,"

"You're welcome, Mandi!" Alice sang. Amanda didn't smile. This kindness she was getting from all directions was such a contrast to what she was used to she wasn't sure how to respond. The corners of her lips twitched, but she turned and exited the building before Dr Cullen changed his mind and made her get to work. Amanda still wasn't so sure she liked him. She was being stubborn in her dislike for the kind doctor, but she didn't want to lose that control just yet.

*

*

*

Amanda got home in record time. The rain had just started to come down more heavy as she got to Donna's house. She hurried inside and closed the door behind with a slam. Donna and her boyfriend, Bobby were sitting on the couch watching the television. They didn't even look up at her to acknowledge her return home. That suited Amanda just fine.

She quietly grabbed the box of cheerios from the counter and took it to her room to snack on. She had only an apple today and her stomach was aching in protest. She sat on her mattress bed and then looked down at the beautiful, new jacket she had on. It was the nicest thing she had ever worn in her life. And it felt soft and warm against her skin.

After eating a few handfuls of cheerios, Amanda pulled out a few old Archie comics from the bottom drawer of the chipped dresser next to her and began to read them. She liked to imagine herself in the fictional town of Riverdale. It was almost always sunny there and the problems that Archie and his friends had always got resolved at the end of each comic.

She liked to pretend she was Betty or Veronica because she admired their outfits. She smiled to herself and touched the fabric of Alice's designer jacket once more. Amanda had no clue who Marc Jacobs was, but she had a feeling this jacket was something special.

It certainly was special to Amanda. She bit her lip and thought about the thin, dark haired girl who had lent it to her. She was not normally someone Amanda would look up to. Alice was far too perky and perfect. She was almost Gothic in her harsh appearance, though she was undeniably beautiful.

Yet, something about Alice made Amanda feel happy inside. She couldn't wait to see her again. _'Maybe tomorrow after school Alice will be at her father's work again!'_ she thought optimistically. Amanda sighed and leaned back against the wall. A smile lit up her pallid face.

* * *

**'Accio Reviews!' *waves magic wand and hopes for the best***

**Please and thank you in advance! **


	7. Storm

**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter seven  
**

|Storm|

Elizabeth had been correct about the weather. The wind had picked up that evening and the trees whipped viciously as the storm blew through Kipta Valley. The rain was torrential and the streets flooded slightly because the drainage system was too slow to keep up with the downpour. The rain had knocked out the phone lines as well.

Everyone in Kipta was tucked into his or her homes waiting out the storm. Most were sleeping peacefully through the harsh winds and rain, but not all. Amanda was still up and it was nearly midnight. However, it was not the storm that had her bent in a corner shaking.

"YOU STUPID GIRL!" Bobby yelled down at Amanda. She tried not to look at him. She hugged her knees and waited for the berating to end.

"Sleeeve herss salone, Bob-ay," Donna slurred her speech as she clung to the doorway of Amanda's bedroom for stability. She and Bobby reeked of alcohol. They both were intoxicated from consuming an insipid amount of rye whiskey.

"Aw, DON'T defend the little BRAT!" he spat. Even in his uncontrollable drunken state, Bobby could speak clearly. It was not the first time he had drank so much he'd lost his temper. He was what people would call 'an angry drunk'.

Amanda cowered as he barked down at her. She was not sure why she had done to set him off this time, but this was the worst it had ever been. It was the drunkest Amanda had ever seen the pair of them.

"Your teacher called when you were off playing today," Bobby said in a fake, kind voice. He bent down and grabbed Amanda by the front of her nightshirt and yanked her forward toward him. His breath burned Amanda's eyes, but she was too frightened to look away.

"Bobs it nots a big deal," Donna made a weak attempt to stop her boyfriend's tirade.

"Oh, oh…I think stealing is a PRETTY DAMN BIG DEAL!" he raged loudly directly in Amanda's face. A whimper escaped her lips involuntarily. It made Bobby smile to see her fear.

"That is right, you LITTLE SHIT! You are nothing but a THIEF! An UNWANTED, good for nothing, CRIMINAL!" Bobby shook Amanda roughly with his one hand still holding her firmly in front of him. Donna stepped in and stumbled down on the clutter of magazines that were crowding half of Amanda's bedroom.

"Stops it Bobsy!" Donna said as she got herself back up into an upright position.

"She needs to be punished. YOU LIKE TO STEAL DON'T YOU?" he barked. Amanda shook her head, her large eyes not blinking.

"Cars, school supplies.... MONEY! Ya, I know you have been taking money from our pockets! DO YOU THINK I AM STUPID!?!"

Amanda didn't say anything. It sounded like a rhetorical question to her.

"Well? DO YOU?" he asked her again, this time practically lifting her up off the ground as he stood from his crouch with her night gown still locked in his fist.

"No Sir," Amanda meekly answered. The fear in her voice was evident.

"And this coat you have here.... I have not seen this before. Where did you steal this from?" He asked with malicious contempt, picking up Alice's jacket from beside Amanda's mattress and waving it in her face roughly.

"A friend loaned it to me,"

"What friend? YOU ARE A LIAR!" he spit as he yelled. Donna had an expression of concern on her tired face. She had always been hard on Amanda, and neglectful more often than not, but she had never laid a hand on her physically.

"Bobbieee," Donna pleaded and she put her hand on his shoulder to pull him away from Amanda.

It all happened so quickly that Amanda didn't see Bobby actually hit Donna. He had released her nightgown and she had fallen to the floor. When she looked up, Donna was on the ground as well. Blood was dripping from the corner of Donna's mouth and filling up the crevasses between each of her teeth as she glanced up at Bobby in shock. Donna was so intoxicated she could hardly fell the pain from his powerful punch.

"BITCH!" he shouted down at Donna. Bobby swung his leg back and then it flew into Donna's side. She gagged on impact, expelling all the air from her lungs.

Amanda gawked in horror. Her instincts told her to run. She bolted up and towards the door, but Bobby grabbed her wrist and yanked her back roughly. He got a better hold of her above the elbow and squeezed so hard Amanda screamed out! He didn't know his own strength. With his fingers held tightly around her thin upper arm he drew back over his hand above his head.

But Amanda didn't wait for Bobby to strike her. She leaned in and sank her teeth into his hand as hard as she could until he snapped his arm away from her. A string of violent curse words spewed from his lips and Amanda was out the door before he had recovered from his now bleeding wound that Amanda had left in his hand in the shape of two crescents.

She didn't look back. She heard clutter falling down behind her and Bobby yelling indecencies at her, but she ran for the front door. There was some crashing of glass as she finally got to the door and swung it open to escape. Bobby must have fallen down. This was the miracle of Donna's cluttered home.

Amanda continued to run, bare footed, down Birch Street until she hit Main and finally glanced behind her. Her fear did not subside when she saw no one following her. She contemplated going to the nearest house to use the phone, but she remembered Donna saying that phone lines were not working in the storm.

Amanda stood for a moment, her over-sized, grey t-shirt was now soaked almost black from the rain and her hair clung to her face, and she made her next move.

She began to run again. She ran toward the forest, through the ravine, and to the large lake house!

*

*

*

"No way, Alice! I don't want to play. You cheat!" Emmet responded to Alice's outreach to play a game of chess with her.

"I won't cheat. I will keep my mind only in the present. I promise!" she gleamed brightly. It was not always so easy to do, but Alice was sometimes able to block visions if she tried really hard. She normally let them come, though. It was more natural for her and besides that…she liked her psychic talent. The others had grown tired of it over the years and were only grateful when Alice was using her skill to see something of great importance concerning the whole family.

"Naw, Jasper and I are almost at the final level here. Play with Rose!" he answered, his eyes glued to the sixty-inch television as he fiddled with the remote control in his hand. The Xbox 360 was his favorite toy at the moment. He had a few spare controllers lying out beside him in case he got too rough and crushed the one in his hands. He and Jasper went through nearly a dozen controllers each week.

"Fine. But you do realize that when playing with you I have no need to cheat in the first place, don't you?" Alice chirped at Emmet and flicked the back of his head with her fingers.

"Sure sure," he answered without turning from the screen.

"I will play with you, but if you could please try to not predict the game that would be nice," Rosalie told Alice as they zipped to coffee table to set up their game.

Esme was busy at work planning how to renovate the guesthouse down by the water. It had been an old shed, but she was planning on fixing it up. That was one of Esme's favorite hobbies; renovating. She had never had the time or money to do such planning as a human.

She got married right out of high school and had a baby. Her life revolved around her baby until the day that child died. It was after the realization she would never see her beloved girl again she took her own life. A short fall off a high cliff sent Esme to her near death.

It was amazing she lived long enough for Carlisle to find her in the morgue that day and change her into the beautiful, loving creature she was today. Otherwise, the Cullen's would not have the same family life they do now. Esme became the perfect wife and mother to them all.

Carlisle took a moment from writing in his journal to look at his dear wife in admiration. She had come such a long way from the day she awoke from death. Esme was the newest vampire to their family, but her loving nature made it easier for her to abide by the family diet of only animal blood.

Only once did she kill for a taste of human blood. It was in her tenth day as a newborn vampire and her strength over powered both Carlisle and Emmet who tried to restrain her. It was too late, by the time they got to the hiker, he was dead and Esme was in shock. It was the first and last time she had drank human blood. She hated herself for murdering that lone hiker.

The family still kept their eye on her. Knowing that she had not been trying as long as the have to stick to the 'vegetarian' diet, they liked to call it. But since that tenth day, Esme had not faltered. She was presently able to come into close contact with humans and could resist the bloodlust on her own will. Carlisle was thrilled with her progress. Not once had she resented him for changing her into the magnificent vampire she had become.

"Alice!" Rosalie announced harshly, breaking the quiet thoughts around the room. Alice's face was blank as she peered into the future for a short moment. When a few second had passed by she came out of her trance and shrugged at Rosalie in her own defense.

"I slipped. Sorry, Rose," Alice apologized. Then she got up, like there was a fire she had to put out.

"Where are you going? Who won?" Rosalie asked, looking at their half finished game.

"Oh, I don't know. Uh…me!" Alice quickly answered her sister before returning to her urgent duty. Rosalie huffed and backed away from the game in disgust. She didn't like to lose.

"Mom. We need to go," Alice said surly and calmly to her adoptive mother with a serious to her normally playful face. She was not smiling, but she was certain of what she needed to do and that was to get Esme away from the house before the uninvited guest she had seen in her vision arrived.

"All right, dear," Esme nodded, not questioning her daughter's motive.

"I will go too," Jasper stood immediately and stood by Alice's side in support. His petite wife nodded, not needing to give him the details behind her plan.

"Alice?" Carlisle inquired. He trusted his daughter's judgment, but he still wanted an explanation. All eyes were on the tiny vampire.

"We are getting a human visitor shortly and Esme will not be able to control her thirst. Not even Jasper will be able to calm her down. We will take Esme North until I see that it is clear to return," Alice spoke rapidly. Esme was a bit shocked. She hadn't been a threat to a human visitor in nearly two decades. But she didn't argue with Alice. It was common knowledge in the Cullen house not to bet against her.

"Of course, let's go," Esme agreed to go with Alice. They were just about to head out the door in Alice's rush, but the pixie girl turned to Carlisle to give him more details.

"You will need to call Liz on her cell and have her meet you at the clinic. Do it now. No time to explain!"

Then, in a flash, Alice, Jasper and Esme were gone.

*

*

*

Amanda never stopped running. She couldn't feel her feet anymore. They were too cold. Her face stung as the rain and wind whipped at it. She couldn't give up her mission. She was determined to help Donna.

She was not sure why she cared so much about her foster mother at this time. She had spent almost a year hating the woman she lived with. Yet, tonight, Donna had tried to help her. So, Amanda knew Donna had some sort of sense of decency within her. And Amanda also knew she had to do the right thing, regardless of her feelings towards the woman.

She saw the lake house in her vision as she ran over the slippery, wet mud that made a thin trail around the lake and passed the two docks. Amanda nearly slid and fell a few times, but was able to regain her balance in time. She was surprised at how agile she was when she needed to be.

The lights were on in the three-story mansion by the lake. Amanda had not planned how she would go about this part of her mission, but she continued to sprint to the house none-the-less. She reached the dock she had fallen off of a few days earlier and then held her head up to see a familiar face hurrying towards her.

For the first time since their meeting, Amanda was glad to see Dr Cullen.

*

*

*

Carlisle put his mobile phone back in his black, dress pant pocket after making a call to his assistant's cell to do as Alice had ordered. Elizabeth didn't ask why he needed her to go open up the medical building at midnight. Carlisle simply said he would explain it to her later and she was on board and did as he asked of her.

"I see something!" Rosalie announced as she peered out from the second floor, bay windows overlooking the lake. Emmet and Carlisle were at her side in a split second.

"It looks like a midget," Emmet gave his take on the small shape that became more visible as it ran closer. Carlisle made no remark about that comment. He recognized the child coming towards them, drenched with rain and speckled with mud.

"Amanda!" he exclaimed softly and left to meet her outside. Rosalie and Emmet exchanged similar expressions of confusion.

Carlisle was out the door in record time, but he was forced to jog at a human's pace down the steep decline of the property heading down towards the dock behind their house. Amanda was nearly at the dock at this time and she glanced up at him. She stopped abruptly.

The spread of relief that washed over her made her crumble under the extremities of the moment. Her knees hit the ground first. Then her hands slid into the mud as she pressed down. She was beyond fatigued.

Carlisle got to her seconds later and didn't waste any time. He cradled her to him and rushed her into the house where Rosalie was building a fire and had the heat on to warm up the large, usually cool home.

"Don-n-na," Amanda stuttered, trying to get Dr Cullen to understand, but he was only thinking of one thing. And that was getting her dry and warm. Her skin matched the cool temperature of his own skin and her lips were a soft purple shade. Amanda reached and touched his face to get him to look at her. When he did she tried again to speak.

"Don-na's ….." she airily gasped out short syllables, "hurt!"

"Donna did this? Where does it hurt?" he misconstrued her meaning, his brow furrowed in deep concern.

"No," she gasped so softly she was not audible. She shook her head in response as well. They were inside now and greeted by Rosalie and Emmet who were also in the dark thus far. Rosalie had another one of Emmet's large sweaters in her outreached arms to use as a blanket. Carlisle handed Amanda to his daughter and guided her to place the child on the sofa.

"Tell me where it hurts, Darling," he encouraged.

"Don-na!" Amanda blurted out with more force this time. She was resisting Carlisle attempt to take her pulse. He didn't seem to be listening to her, and thinking only of her care. She pulled her arm away from his and yelped in pain. It was the same arm that Bobby had yanked on so viciously when she had made her escape.

"Amanda, you have to calm down. I can't help you if you won't let me," he told her gently, taking her thin, injured arm in his hand lightly to take a look at the dark, finger-shaped bruises that had formed where Bobby had held onto her.

"I..you…"Amanda was frustrated she couldn't seem to catch her breath long enough to tell him. She could only fight to get his attention away from her sore arm. Carlisle was used to Amanda resisting his care.

"Take a few deep breaths, Amanda," Rosalie spoke up, her hand making a pattern of circles on the little girl's back as she tried to help the situation. "That's it,"

"He h-hit her!" Amanda tried again after only one deep breath. She had no time to waste and too much time was passing as she struggled to tell her story.

"Who?" Carlisle asked. He was starting to realize that it wasn't Amanda who he was meant to help tonight. Amanda had come to get help, but not for herself.

"Try again, Amanda," Rosalie encouraged seeing that they were finally getting somewhere.

"Donna…she…g-got b-beat-en up," Amanda was able to finally say the words now that she was warming up and they had given her the time to speak.

"She is at your home?" Carlisle asked, understanding the situation more clearly now. Amanda nodded, her face pale from the cold, but her eyes large and bright with adrenaline racing through her veins.

"Go!" Rosalie said to her father. "I will make sure Amanda is all right and then bring her to you. Go help the woman!"

Carlisle agreed hesitantly. He wanted to help Donna, of course, but he was apprehensive to leave Amanda in her state. He was uncertain of her maladies. He sighed and got up, carefully letting Amanda's injured arm rest down on her lap to eliminate causing her pain.

"Warm her up. Get her something to hot to sip on. Esme keeps tea in the jar by the stove in case of guests," he explained in a hurry. Emmet handed him his coat to put on and his black medical bag. Rosalie understood and bobbed her head up and down quickly.

"Don't worry. I will take care of her," she said. Carlisle tried to smile, but he didn't have a lot of time. He turned and left the room. He trusted Rosalie completely.

Seconds later there was a roar of an engine and the scratching of tires on the wet road.

Mission complete.

Amanda finally relaxed and sank into Rosalie's arms, cuddled in Emmet's large sweater. It smelled like sweet spices.

*

*

*

Elizabeth was stunned when Dr Cullen showed up with Donna Combs in his arms, her face swollen on one side and blood tangled in her thin hair and splattered over the front of her grungy sweat clothes. She was conscious, but dazed and confused. She smelled heavily of alcohol.

"Oh dear, God!" she gasped and covered her mouth at first sight of the battered woman. She held the door for Carlisle as he rushed Donna inside. She followed him into the exam room where he laid her down and began assessing her injuries. Elizabeth stood at that door, feeling a bit queasy from the sight of Donna Combs and the shock it had given her.

"Do you need any help in there?" she asked, hoping she could be of use, but afraid Carlisle's response may actually be, yes.

"I can manage. I need you to get a bed ready upstairs for Ms Combs. I will be keeping her overnight for observation," he called out to Elizabeth. She sprang to action and went to prepare one of the beds upstairs in the recovery room.

Carlisle completed his examination and cleaned Donna up. Her blood lose was minor. She had gotten away with only a mild concussion and a lot of bruising on her left side and her face. She was still under the influence of the large amount of alcohol she had consumed, but he managed to explain to her that Amanda was safe with his family. Donna sighed to show a mild relief for Amanda's well being. Carlisle sighed too, knowing that Amanda deserved better.

It took Elizabeth fifteen minutes to dress the bed, fluff the pillows and get the room organized. She brought in a waste bin and some clean towels as well and set everything up neatly.

Moments later, Carlisle arrived in the doorway with Donna by his side. She was barely cohesive. She knew were she was, but not how she got to the medical building. Carlisle was supporting her, but she was walking on her own. He held a yellow bag of fluids in one hand, the thin tube when from it to a vein in Donna's arm. Elizabeth helped get Donna lying down and Carlisle hung the bag of nutrients and minerals above on an IV rack.

"Is there anything I can get for you, Donna?" Elizabeth asked with care. Donna shook her head. She shut her eyes, sadly.

"You will be sore for a few weeks, but the pain should subside for the most part and you will be fine to go home by tomorrow afternoon, Ms Combs. I am going to give you something to help you sleep in a little bit," Carlisle explained, "I will keep you here until under observation for the next twelve to eighteen hours,"

Donna nodded a little, but didn't open her eyes. She was coming around now from her drunken stupor and the reality of what had happened was starting to sink in to her.

"Thank you," she muttered. Elizabeth took her cue to leave so Carlisle could finish with Donna. She heard the bell of the front door ring.

Elizabeth thought she has seen it all when it came to Carlisle's beautiful family, but her mouth hung open just a little at her first glance of Rosalie Cullen. The blonde teenager was every boy's fantasy and every girl's envy. She shut her mouth and her face turned to a more horrified version of stun. Emmet Cullen was the most intimating teenager Elizabeth had ever seen.

Emmet stood back at the door cautiously, smelling Donna's dried blood all the way from exam room that had yet to be cleaned up. Rosalie smelled it too, but she was better with her self-control. He gave up and decided it was better to step outside for some fresh air.

"Amanda," Elizabeth's face softened as she sighed Amanda's name. Rosalie had Amanda by the hand, dressed in some more of Alice's clothing. The only things small enough in their house that would somewhat stay up on the frail frame of the little girl. Rosalie had to pin a few things together, but the point was not fashion. It was to get Amanda warm and into a dry outfit. And that is what Rosalie had accomplished.

"Is my father still with Ms Combs?" Rosalie asked pleasantly, her voice was like a song.

"Yes. He should be done shortly," Elizabeth answered and then right away addressed Amanda, who was cradling her arm carefully. "Amanda, are you all right?"

Amanda nodded. That didn't console Elizabeth's concerns.

"I am sure Dr Cullen will want to take a look at your arm in a moment, darling," she told Amanda who's adrenaline had finally worn off and her eyes barley stayed open. She was too tired to argue or to utter that she was 'fine'. Amanda was far from 'fine'.

Rosalie lifted Amanda onto the front desk, so that she was closer to their height and then smiled at Elizabeth.

"I don't think she has broken anything, but her arm is swelling slightly around the joint," Rosalie told Elizabeth, "Perhaps we should put a cold compress on it until my father can see her,"

"Yes. Good idea. I will go grab one," Elizabeth agreed and went to the medical supply closet and took one of the ice packs from the bin and cracked it to make the chemical reaction kick into gear. By the time she walked back over to Amanda, the pack was turning a cool temperature.

She slid back the baggy sleeve on the designer bolero jacket Amanda was wearing and placed the ice pack gently over Amanda's elbow. Rosalie put her hand on it to hold it in place. The coldness had no effect on her already cool touch. Elizabeth sighed and forced a smile at Amanda who had obviously been through hell that evening.

*

*

*

The rain outside began to let up and the wind was dying down. The clock clicked passed three and Carlisle finally came down from Donna's room. He had to wait for her to sober up before her could give her any pain medication.

She gave him a detailed account of what had happen with Bobby. Or, what she could remember, anyway. He wrote it down so he could pass it on to the town sheriff at day break. As far as Donna knew, Bobby had taken off and was more than likely not coming back. Carlisle felt she was right about that.

Donna fell asleep shortly after Dr Cullen administered a small dose of morphine into her intravenous and then he left her to sleep in peace. His first task was to shove every item that had blood on it into a bag and seal it well to reduce the temptation for his family members waiting downstairs. Then he went to do the same with the exam room on the main level.

Elizabeth showed up beside him and took over.

"Here. I will get rid of all the gore. Your daughter is waiting with Amanda in the lobby for you,"

Carlisle nodded lightly in appreciation. They both smiled quietly between them and he left the bloodied exam room to take a look at Amanda. He walked down the hallway to where Rosalie had placed Amanda up on the high counter of the reception desk.

"This was quite an eventful evening," he said lightly, hoping to relieve some of the strain of the girl's face.

"Is Donna okay?" Amanda asked, as he removed the ice pack from her elbow and studied her arm gently. He paused for a moment to smile at Amanda.

"She is going to be fine in a few days. She is a little banged up right now," Carlisle told Amanda, downplaying how seriously Donna could have been injured and how close Amanda came to being hurt as well. He didn't want to add any more stress to Amanda's already rough life. She was holding up remarkably well after the night she had just went through.

"How about you, Amanda? How are you doing?" he asked her. She kept her head down and watched his hands carefully feel her arm, bending it slowly.

"I'm okay," Amanda whispered. She yawned. The exhaustion was written all over her somber face.

"It is passed your bed time, young lady," he joked mildly as he extended Amanda's arm a bit more.

"Ow!" Amanda gasped sharply as he tested her arm's mobility. Her adrenaline gone now, she could feel the aches in her body from the long sprint she took from Donna's house to Dr Cullen's lake house.

"Sorry, Sweetheart," he said, putting her arm down again. "I won't move it anymore,"

"Is it just a sprain?" Rosalie asked. She had suspected as much.

"I think so, but we are going to get an x-ray to be sure," he said. He reached out to Amanda, who let him hoist her into his arms and take her through the first door on the right of the hallway.

The room was filled with large machines. Amanda didn't seem to notice. She was too tired and let Dr Cullen and his daughter lay her on one of the tables and position her arm for the x-ray. They covered her chest and torso with a protective cover and then told her to be very still. Amanda shut her eyes and did as she was told.

A few moments later, when Rosalie returned to help the girl off the table, she found Amanda was asleep. She picked her up and carried her out into the hallway careful to cradle her arm so she wouldn't hurt Amanda and wake her up.

Carlisle quickly produced the film and brought the slide over to the light board in the hallway to study it. Rosalie stood next to him and looked at the skeletal picture of Amanda's right arm.

"What do you see?" Carlisle asked Rosalie. She stepped forward one step and leaned in to study the picture.

"I don't see any new fracture," she whispered, "just a few faint lines from previous injury,"

Her father nodded at her assessment. And Rosalie was correct. Amanda had broken her right wrist twice when she was a younger. Once, falling out of a bunk bed when she was five and then again on her seventh birthday when Tyler gave her a skateboard as a gift.

"Good eye," he complimented her. Rosalie smiled gratefully for his approval. She so very rarely got any from him. She so very rarely showed this sort of compassion towards anyone.

"I'd better get Emmet home. He is outside waiting. Who knows what trouble he will get into," Rosalie broke up the touching father/daughter moment that they were sharing. It was nice for a second or so, but she was not a fan of mushy, lovey-dovey moments.

Carlisle chuckled and took Amanda from his beautiful, and sometimes caring, daughter. He smiled as she flipped her hair and walked gracefully out of the building to take Emmet home.

After he managed to sling Amanda's arm without waking her, Elizabeth finished up with the exam room and found him sitting with the child in the lobby. She smiled at the sight of Amanda sleeping with her head on his shoulder.

Carlisle noticed how the late night had affected his assistant as well. He had woken her up, after all. Elizabeth yawned and touched Amanda's hair affectionately.

"I have to check on Ms Combs. Would you please take Amanda and see to it she gets some rest," he asked of Elizabeth, standing up slowly. It was a lot to demand of a person, but he somehow knew Elizabeth wouldn't mind caring for the girl while Donna was recuperating.

"Of course," Elizabeth sighed happily and took Amanda from Dr Cullen with ease. Amanda mumbled something and repositioned herself in Elizabeth's arms, but didn't wake. She was dead to the world. As Elizabeth was just about to leave to go home, Carlisle spoke up.

"I want you to take today off from work, Liz,"

"Oh, I-," she began to turn him down, wanting to be professional, but he held up his and shook his head. This was the first time he had ever used her nick name, Liz. The kind, sincere smile on his face told her that she didn't have to worry about being professional right then. He was acting as a friend.

"Take care of Amanda," was all he said. Elizabeth nodded and continued on home. She wondered when the good doctor was going to find time to rest himself, but she couldn't worry about him when she had Amanda to look after. The innocent child needed sleep and a few good meals. Elizabeth was more than happy to oblige.

*

*

*

The dawn hit at twenty-seven minutes after five in the morning and Carlisle was had just left Donna's room after hanging another bag of saline above her bed. He was worried about dehydration after the amount of alcohol she had ingested. The battered woman was fast asleep and her vitals were all normal.

Carlisle took a seat in his office to write, in Donna's patient file, a more in depth description of her injuries. There was a knock at the window and he turned to see Alice's pretty face looking at him curiously. Somehow, asking if it was okay to come in. He got up and opened the window for his daughter.

"You know we have a front door, don't you?" he asked with a grin. She nodded, but she was not in a playful mood. That concerned him. He began to worry that something may have happened to Esme. "Alice?" he pried for more information.

"I did something awful," she said sadly, her face frowned like a scolded child about to make a confession. Carlisle's touched her on the shoulder and waited for her to explain.

"Whatever it is, Alice. You can tell me,"

There was a long pause as Alice reconsidered telling Carlisle what she had not shared with anyone else, not even Jasper. She decided her first inclination was right. She needed to warn Carlisle. She needed him to be the one to make the decision as to what their family was going to about the vision she had seen last night while playing chess with Rosalie.

"I lied to all of you last night," Alice admitted. Carlisle's eyebrows rose slightly, but he kept a calm composure as she egged Alice to continue.

"I am sure you had a good reason for doing so,"

"I hope so... I panicked when I made a realization through my vision," Alice said carefully. She was unsure how to say what she wanted to say.

"Realization?" Carlisle inquired. He waited patiently for Alice to speak. He had no idea how unready he was for what she was about to tell him.

"Mom would not have hurt Amanda...She would have recognized her as her own blood!" Alice stated with a voice so clear Carlisle knew she was speaking the truth.

No one bet against Alice.

* * *

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	8. Juliet

**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Eight  
**

|Juliet|

She could see the woman in white standing still, back toward her. It was dawn and the light shone rays down through the trees. The particles in the air make the light sparkle around the ethereal figure. Amanda slowly, quietly made her way over to the woman she called Mother and grabbed her by the arm.

'_Caught you!'_ Amanda thought gleefully. This time she had the upper hand. Her mother couldn't run from her. _'She will have to stay with me!'_

The woman in white, turned to face Amanda. Her face was not the same one Amanda was use to seeing. Her angel was sad.

"What's wrong?" Amanda pleaded for the woman to speak to her, but the angel only cried. No tears fell from her weeping eyes. The sorrow was overbearing and Amanda let go of the grasp she had on the woman's wrist.

As soon as she let go, the angel faded away into the woods again.

"Come back! Don't leave me! Please!" Amanda called out frantically, hoping the woman would give her another chance. She didn't mean to scare her away.

'_I've lost her. I have lost her again. How could I let her go like that? What if she never comes back to me?'_

Amanda sank down to the forest floor once more, as she always did in this scene and she hung her head to cry.

*

*

*

When Amanda opened her eyes she reached to her face immediately to rid her face of any residue left over from her dream filled sleep. She slapped her face with her free hand and then dragged it across her check. But there were no tears. She did the same test to her other cheek and then looked at her fingertips to be sure they were dry. There was no sign that she had been crying at all.

Amanda scrunched her face a bit and squinted as she noticed that it was morning and bright light was beaming down on her. It was like her memories from last night hit her all at once. She jolted up to a sitting position and felt her heart skip a beat. This was not her bed with soft covers and silky pillows all around her.

'_Where am I?'_ she wondered, looking around the room. The walls were a soft blue and had white boarders around the windows and door frames. The curtains were sheer white and let so much light pass through them the room was practically fully light without any lights turned on. Amanda felt soft squishy fabric all around her and reached out to touch what she was sitting on.

"Ouch!" she whispered sharply when her right arm pinched as she carelessly tied to extend it. Amanda looked down and studied her arm. It was slung in navy blue casing and strapped around her neck and around her chest that made moving it difficult, but obviously not avoidable.

She sighed and remembered how her arm was injured. She tried not to think about those details and focus more on figuring out where she was. The soft cushions around her were like lying in a bed of clouds. Amanda knew this was not Donna's house. She wondered if she was perhaps still at the lake house.

It was a fair guess. The Cullen's owned the largest home in Kipta. It was a mansion as far as Amanda was concerned and from what she had seen of the inside, this clean, bright room could belong inside it. However, it was a bit small she thought. The bed took up most of the room.

"Amanda?" a voice asked softly through the door. "Are you awake, Dear?"

Amanda turned to look at the door trying to recognize the kind voice she was hearing. It was just such a strange way to wake up with someone calling her, darling. She should have responded by now, but she was a bit disgruntled from waking up in a strange place so Amanda remained silent. The doorknob twisted slowly and Elizabeth's inquiring face poked inside.

"Oh, good! You are up. How are you feeling?" Elizabeth asked, opening the door wider and walking into the room towards Amanda. She tucked a piece of her rust colored hair behind her ear and smiled sincerely.

Amanda wasn't sure how to answer. She was fine, she thought, except for all the problems she already had and now an immobile right arm, which ached dully in it's casing. It just didn't seem fitting to lie and say she was 'fine' or 'okay'.

Elizabeth sat down on the bed and touched Amanda's right hand carefully.

"Is your arm bothering you?"

"Not much," Amanda answered truthfully, looking down at her hand in Elizabeth's hand. How strange it felt for someone to care. Amanda didn't mind at all. In fact, she felt rather elated to know she was in Liz's home.

"Dr Cullen said to ice it in the morning again, but you were sleeping so soundly I didn't want to wake you. It is after one already," Elizabeth explained. Amanda's eyes widened. She realized she was missing school and panic set in. She pulled away from Elizabeth and kicked the covers away to flee the warm bed she had been nestled in.

"Oh my God! I am so late!" Amanda exclaimed and inched forward so her legs dangled over the edge of the bed and then she slid down until her toes squished in the plush carpet beneath her.

"Amanda, it's okay. Calm down," Liz took Amanda by the shoulders and steadied the young girl, who was scared she was going to be punished for missing school. "I called Mrs Brightman and told her you were taking the day off today. You are not in any trouble,"

"Really?" Amanda checked to be sure what she was hearing was the truth. She didn't think Elizabeth Roth would lie, but she felt nervous for some reason.

"Yes, darling. You had a very late night last night. Donna is still at the medical clinic so I brought you home with me. You are taking the day off from school to rest,"

"Oh," Amanda said in a low voice. She felt a flutter of joy in the pit of her stomach. She nearly smiled at the thought of not having to go to school. Elizabeth chuckled and nodded.

"You must be famished. I am going to make something nice and hot to eat for breakfast. Or I guess it would be called lunch at this time of day!" she thrilled merrily at the waif of a child standing before her. Amanda was at a loss for words again. Or more, the words she was hearing from Elizabeth were so foreign to her that she was not sure how to respond to them. A hot meal sounded like Heaven to Amanda's ears.

"Come along. You can sit at the table and we will get an ice pack on your arm while I am making you something to eat," Elizabeth instructed, taking the lead because she could see that Amanda was not comfortable to do so without some guidance. She took Amanda by the hand and led her to the kitchen.

*

*

*

Alice perched herself on top of Carlisle's mahogany office desk with her legs folded tightly into a neat, compact pretzel shape and leaned over to type at the laptop in front of her. The white light illuminating from the screen made her face glow incandescent. She was certain that Amanda must be in relation to Esme.

The context of her vision was true, she had no doubt, but whether or not it would ever come to play was the uncertainty. If Esme didn't have the chance to meet Amanda that future would not play out. However, Amanda would still be related to Esme if the truth came out or not. So Alice had to get her facts in order. Alice needed to be sure of what she knew before she and Carlisle could plan what to do next.

Alice saw in a brief hint ahead in time that the article she was searching for was from a Hailey, Idaho Newspaper where Esme spent the majority of her human life. Her mother very rarely talked about her past. She said it brought up too many painful memories. After 30 years of living with Esme, Alice knew very little about her adoptive mother's human life.

So, she was busy looking up newspaper articles for the date Esme had committed suicide. Alice knew the gist of what drove her mother to take her life, but none of the details. That was where the truth about Amanda was sure to lie, Alice felt. She cringed as she delved into her mother's past. It was violating a sacred trust to be snooping her mother's history without consent.

Carlisle walked into his office and found Alice on his desk and stopped short at her position on his desk. She glanced up at him with an innocent expression. She really didn't understand how she was out of order to be sitting atop his desk like she was. The stress of lurking in the past was written on her face. Carlisle sat down beside Alice in his chair and chose not to comment on her seating arrangement on his expensive wood piece of furniture.

"Find anything yet?" he solemnly asked. He also felt like he was betraying his wife by going behind her back to look for something to explain Alice's vision. He didn't like keeping this from his wife. Alice sighed and leaned back.

"Not yet. I am close, though," she offered her insight. Alice met eyes with her father for his approval to continue. He didn't say a word, so she turned back to the brilliant, white screen and kept scanning articles.

Carlisle was trying to put the pieces together for himself.

He knew his wife had tried killing herself after the death of her baby girl. That is what she had told him after she had joined their family. It was in the summer or 1971 in Hailey, Idaho. He and the family had been living there for eleven years, nearly time to move on to a new town, when he was working late one night at the hospital and found Esme still breathing in the morgue.

He remembered how weak she was, but she was mumbling in her half-dead state. He had been too distracted at the time to comprehend her dying words. He had been too busy contemplating whether or not to let her pass away peacefully, he could slip her an overdose of morphine, or to take her home and change her to save her life.

At the time, he had not known how she had gotten to the morgue in that dire state, but he had recognized her from ten years earlier when he had treated her for a broken leg. He knew he would love her for the rest of eternity and had felt hope that she would return the gesture. So, he stole her from the hospital and took her home to be with his family.

There, he was successful in making her transition from human to vampire complete. And as a vampire, Esme was a success in every way. However, she was always reluctant to discuss her past and Carlisle never pressed her to talk about it. He never wanted her to feel pain again so long as they lived. That was the vow he took to uphold the day they married.

Carlisle knew he was missing one detail. He couldn't understand how Amanda could be of his wife's blood when Esme had been an only child with no other family but her mother and father, who he knew had died a decade back in a house fire. He had never told Esme about her parents. She didn't like to talk about them after her change and he knew their death would only hurt her.

Alice's head twitched and Carlisle was ripped from his thoughts to give her his full attention. She had found something.

"Oh my Goodness," she airily heaved and turned the laptop towards her father to read for himself. A twist in Esme's story that even he never imagined possible….

*

*

*

Amanda sat at Elizabeth's white, kitchen table and took in the rich aroma of fresh home cooking that was wafting through the house. Her stomach gurgled in anticipation. She could not remember the last time she had a hot breakfast. She was used to having an apple or a bowl of cereal on the mornings she didn't skip the meal all together.

"I don't want to brag, but the wait is going to be worth it, Amanda. I make amazing Pancakes!" Elizabeth exclaimed with a playful grin and took a moment away from the griddle to pour Amanda a glass of orange juice. She set it down on the table for Amanda to drink while waiting for the food to be prepared. Amanda took the glass in her left hand and carefully brought it to her mouth. Her good arm was propped up on the table with bag of ice wrapped in a towel placed on top of it.

She managed to drink without spilling her orange juice and put the glass down on the table half empty. Amanda watched Elizabeth flip a pancake, then another, all the while humming a soft tune. Amanda noticed how cozy Elizabeth's home was. It was clean, like the Cullen's house, but decorated less modern. The top of the cupboards displayed old-fashioned teapots and the shelving on the wall had little figurines and picture frames cluttering them.

One picture, hung properly on the soft yellow wall, was Elizabeth and a man posing romantically for the black and white photograph. It screamed 'wedding photo' and Amanda squinted to get a better look at the man in the photograph. _'He is kinda nice looking,' _Amanda decided.

"That's my husband, Cole," Elizabeth explained, seeing Amanda's interest in her wedding photo. She wistfully closed her eyes in thinking of her husband who was away traveling, a faint smile on her face. She sighed and opened her eyes, her smile widening as she set a plate and cutlery down in Amanda's place.

"Do you like butter and syrup on your pancakes, Hon?"

"Ummm?" Amanda hummed, not knowing how she liked to eat pancakes. It has been so long since she had any. And the casual way that Elizabeth talked to her like they had known each other a lot longer than a few weeks was a bit offsetting for Amanda.

"You're a kid. Butter and syrup! Enjoy it while you still can!" she joked and made the choice for Amanda. She slathered a clump of yellow butter on the steaming pile until it melted completely. Next, she poured a swirl of liquid, maple sugar across the stack of cakes on Amanda's plate. Lastly, she sat down across from Amanda.

"Thank you," as the only words appropriate to say, Amanda knew, as she eyed the steaming meal in front of her. The pancakes were freckled with chocolate chips. Amanda practically licked her lips.

"You're welcome. Now, dig in. I have to get you fed so we can get on with the day. We both have the day off so I thought we should make the best of it. We can watch movies or play games. Whatever you'd like to do," Elizabeth explained happily as Amanda struggled to cut her pancakes with the fork in her left hand.

Just as Amanda was about to try a go at using her right hand, Elizabeth stepped in. Instinctively, she took the fork from Amanda and began to cut up the pancakes into bite size pieces. "Here, darling. Let me help you," Elizabeth offered as she was already slicing the pancakes in to neat squares. Amanda sighed heavily. She was starving, but practiced her patience.

As soon as she got the fork back from Elizabeth she dug in. Her left hand didn't seem to handicap her ability to gobble up the plate of pancakes in what must have been a record time. The cakes were perfect. Elizabeth had been right to brag. They were better than amazing! So warm and sweet, the butter made them rich and delicious, and the maple syrup was like liquid candy. Amanda tried to eat slowly, but she couldn't help rush through the full plate.

Elizabeth sat silently, watching Amanda enjoy the meal. She couldn't help but feel a bit nauseous when she saw how very hungry Amanda was. It was as if the child was seeing food for the first time in weeks. Elizabeth's chest felt tight and she gulped down the lump in her throat. She turned her inner upset into another big grin on her face for Amanda's sake.

Amanda looked up from her protective lean over the plate of food in front of her and paused. She swallowed the mouthful she had all ready chewed and then she put her fork down. Her stomach was not pleased with her for stuffing it so full in such a short period of time. Elizabeth was still watching her lovingly. Amanda pushed away from the table, taking her right arm with her carefully, leaving the soggy towel filled with ice on the table.

"Wow! You sure gobbled those up in a hurry," Elizabeth stated cheerfully seeing that Amanda was finished with her meal. Only three small squares of pancake remained on the plate.

"I'm sorry. I was really hungry," Amanda mumbled, embarrassed. Elizabeth was standing and took the plate away and walked it to the kitchen sink.

"Don't be. It had been a long time since supper last night. Of course you were hungry," Elizabeth excused Amanda's table manners, letting the dish sink down in to the soapy water. Amanda scrunched her lips out and squinted her eyes as she tried to remember what she had eaten for supper. _'Cheerios'_ she remembered.

"Ya, I was really hungry," she replied. Now she was so full her stomach hurt in a different way. She was not sure which she preferred. Empty…or too full.

However, after a half an hour, Amanda's stomach settled and she felt great. A full eight hours of sleep and a warm, glucose meal made her almost lively. Elizabeth had a bunch of board games and pulled them out for Amanda to choose from.

"I like Monopoly," Amanda announced uncertainly.

"Then Monopoly it is!" Elizabeth cheered, putting all the other games aside and starting to ensemble the large board on her coffee table in front of Amanda. She was pleased at how well Amanda was today after the trauma she had faced last night. But Amanda was no stranger to hard times. Last night was just another bump in the road. It hardly made a dent compared to the morning she found her mother dead.

"Can I be the battleship?" Amanda asked. Whenever she played Monopoly with Tyler he had dibs on the metal ship player.

"Go for it. I like to play the race car," Elizabeth chirped. She loved playing board games. She and her husband had a cabinet full of games. She liked to collect them and dream of the day when they would have a family of their own and they could all sit around on a 'family game night' and take turns choosing which game to play. Elizabeth, more than anything in life, wanted to have children some day.

Several minutes into the game, Amanda called Elizabeth on that very topic.

"How come you don't have any kids?" she asked. She was realizing how great Liz was how she seemed to be the kind of person who would be a good mother. The kind of mother Amanda had always hoped her mother would be like.

"Oh, well…Cole and I want to start a family. He is traveling for work at the moment so the timing is not very good. Perhaps in a year or so he will be back home with me we can begin to build a family together," she rambled on, not only talking for Amanda to hear, but she needed to hear those words as well. She missed Cole terribly and she missed the children she knew she wanted one day.

"How many do you want?" Amanda asked, trying to make conversation as she saw adults do all the time. It was easy for her to talk to Elizabeth. She was more of a friend than an authority and Amanda felt comfortable in her presence. Elizabeth laughed at the question and rolled the pair of dice.

"Oh, I don't know…three, or four maybe!" she answered as she moved her race car ahead eight spaces landing on 'Reading Railroad'.

"That will be twenty-five dollars please!" Amanda exclaimed, an honest smile lit up her face. Her eyes seemed to be smiling as well. Elizabeth was pleased to see another side of Amanda's personality. She couldn't stand the thought of sending Amanda home with Donna again. _'What trash!'_ Elizabeth thought of her ex-classmate. She knew Donna was not a good person. Not fit to care for a child in the slightest.

The game was ended fairly quickly. Amanda was a good sport about losing to Elizabeth who owned all of the yellow properties and Boardwalk and Park Place. Amanda didn't mind conceding the game and moving on to other games.

The two of them played 'go fish' and 'war' with a pack of cards for nearly an hour. That was the most time an adult had spent on her that Amanda could recall. And Elizabeth was having a blast playing with Amanda.

Amanda couldn't believe her luck. Yesterday had been such an awful day, what with being accused of stealing and then the run in with Bobby. But Amanda was actually enjoying herself with Elizabeth as well. For moments today she had felt like a normal child. Elizabeth had made Amanda feel worthwhile, like she was not just some scrap her mother had been left behind.

"I will be back in a few minutes, my dear. I need to make a phone call," Elizabeth told Amanda, who was now at the white, kitchen table again eating a late afternoon snack.

She saw Elizabeth reach for the phone and Amanda sank down in her seat at the table, still munching on carrot sticks and ranch dip. She knew her time was almost up and she would have to go back to her real life soon. The light that had turned on inside her faded slightly as she came to terms that this day wasn't going to last forever.

*

*

*

Carlisle's heart broke as he finished reading the newspaper article dated a week after Esme's death. The Cullen Family had been preoccupied with a newborn Esme at the time the article was printed in local papers, so they missed the news. And days later, they packed up and left Idaho to start a new life in Forks, Washington and never thought to look back. Esme had never wanted to reminisce about her life in Hailey and they had all respected her wishes up until now.

"I was searching for the wrong posting. Mom's family put out no obituary," Alice began to speak, "Her husband at the time didn't even see fit to make her death known until weeks later when her daughter was found in the woods alive! That is when I stumbled on this article. What a horrible tragedy," Alice moaned. She had her hand over her mouth to try to hide her surprise. Carlisle was still. It had been minutes since he had breathed or moved.

"We need to decide what to do with this information. Esme will be crushed if she found out," he finally spoke. He didn't want to cause his wife anymore pain than she had already been through.

"She will find out," Alice stated surely. "If we do nothing, she will find out eventually on her own. It is only a matter of time. We have to leave if you plan to hide this from her for any real length of time,"

"I don't know. I don't-" Carlisle sighed mournfully. How would he be able to keep this from his wife? He would be lying to her. He was at a loss as to what the moral thing to do was.

"I wish I could see more, but with the future so undecided and so much new information on the table, I can't get anything solid," Alice tried to console her father. He nodded and tried to be rational. It was one of his better strengths. However, his strength seemed to be at a falter. He didn't know how to handle this situation without someone being hurt by the news he and Alice had uncovered.

How could he tell Esme that her daughter never died in the woods like she had killed herself believing?

_'Amy_'....Carlisle now remembered the last words Esme had uttered as a human. He understood now.

Esme's beautiful daughter, Amy, had gone missing after a family hiking trip in Challis. The body that had been found of a mangled young girl was claimed to be Amy's. It was discovered to be the body of a different child when a more detailed autopsy was done. But by this time, Esme had taken her own life and it was too late.

Amy was found alive days later by forest rangers, clinging to life, but still very much alive and identifiable. Her father and grandparents were her only living relatives at the time. Amy had survived.

"I also ran a search on Mom's first husband," Alice explained breaking the quiet tension of the room again, "He relocated himself and Amy to Kipta in 1972. About seven years ago he went to prison for tax evasion and grand larceny. He died a year into his sentence. Amy was eighten at the time,"

"Amy had a little girl. Only a year old…" Carlisle completed the story.

"Amanda," Alice uttered the girl's name musically. Carlisle and Alice sat in silence for a few moments to gather their thoughts. He remembered the day Elizabeth had told him about Amanda's mother...

_"Amy was a wonderful girl, but she had a rough life and when she got pregnant in grade 11, she didn't have the easiest time. Her boyfriend left and she raised Amanda alone. Amy had no family. Her father went to prison a year after Amanda was born. And he died of heart failure not even a year later. Amy loved Amanda dearly, but she was not a great mother. She didn't have a mother of her own and had no idea how to love a child."_

These words he had previously heard from Elizabeth made his grief pull at him with even more force. Esme had left her daughter without a mother, just like Amy had done to Amanda. If Esme knew of this, she would never forgive herself.

'_What am I going to tell Esme? Should I tell her? Should we pack up and leave town?'_ Carlisle fought with himself internally.

'_I have a niece!'_ Alice decided silently. The thought made her feel light again, but she knew it was not the time to be perky. She remained calm to see how Carlisle wanted to proceed. She saw a flicker from the future.

"Phone," Alice murmured, "Elizabeth is wondering if she should keep Amanda one more night?"

Carlisle looked at his watch before turning his hand over to the phone on his desk. It was time he checked on Ms Combs and take her home. Donna had been feeling a lot better this afternoon when he last checked on her, but she spent the whole day in bed just as a precaution. He fully planned on releasing her in an hours time.

The phone rang once and Carlisle answered it begrudgingly. He did not want to send Amanda home with Ms Combs. The plan had been to drop Donna off at the crumbling shack not fit for anyone, especially a child, to live in before dark. Then, Elizabeth could drive Amanda to home afterwards.

Only, now Carlisle felt even less enthusiastic to let Amanda go home with the woman upstairs. He felt responsible for the girl who belonged to his wife's daughter.

"Hello, Elizabeth," Carlisle answered. Alice only listened to his side of the conversation, but knew exactly what Elizabeth was asking permission for. "Yes, she is doing well…yes, I will be driving her home shortly…It is funny you should suggest that. I had the same thought….I will run that by Ms Combs and call you with her answer. Very good. I am glad to hear that…All right, then. I will be calling you within the hour to inform you of Ms Combs' decision…You too….Good bye for now,"

"Ms Combs will not care what you do with Amanda. She is a selfish, cruel, horrid woman!" Alice stated indignantly. She already loathed the woman lying up in a cot upstairs above them from the way she chose to ignore Amanda. Alice had felt possessive over Amanda from the moment she had her first vision of Amanda crashing into the medical building. And Alice had firmly decided that Amanda was her niece now. Her family!

"Alice," Carlisle chastised softly. He always tried to treat his patients with the utmost respect. He softened when he saw Alice shy away. "I know how you feel, but it is up to Ms Combs to decide where Amanda stays tonight. She is Amanda's legal guardian,"

Carlisle touched Alice's shoulder with sympathy. They shared a glance that signified an agreement to keep all this new information secret for the time being. Carlisle left the room to go check on Donna Combs. His lasts words resurfaced in Alice's memory.

"Not for long," Alice whispered. She wasn't sure if Carlisle heard her or not. It didn't matter. She saw some hope in Amanda's future. If it came to term, that would be a blessing for all parties included. However, the future was subjective and so many things could change the outcomes she saw in sight.

The decision to tell Esme she had a granddaughter was still up in the air. Alice knew one thing was for certain. If Amanda or Esme came into contact with one another there would be no hiding the truth.

* * *

**Please Review**

**...that was a big reveal, right? By now, if you are still reading you must like the story somewhat...drop me a review to let me know what you think. It may seem like a chore to you, but it makes me day to hear from the people reading my story. Thank you! **


	9. Left Behind

**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Nine**

|Left Behind|

"Do you want me to go in with you?" Elizabeth asked Amanda as she drove up to the school parking lot in the heap of rusting metal she called her car. Rain splattered on the roof of the red Firefly. The noise didn't help with the gloom looming. Amanda's face was bitter.

"No," Amanda answered softly, sad that she had to get back to normalcy. She had enjoyed her time with Elizabeth immensely. But all good things had to come an end. The last few days had been like a mini vacation. Now she felt the strong pull of depression urging her down, welcoming her back to her own life.

She tugged on Alice's jacket to make sure it was still on her shoulder. She only wore the left sleeve since her right arm was still in a sling. It made her claustrophobic not having full mobility of her limbs. She had tried to take it off a few times, but Elizabeth didn't allow it since her arm was still sore when she tried to move it too much. Elizabeth insisted that Amanda wait until Dr Cullen had a look at it before Amanda could remove the sling. This made Amanda very annoyed, but she liked Elizabeth too well to argue with her. So she promised to obey and keep her arm in the navy casing until after school.

Amanda had spent another night at Elizabeth's house. Dr Cullen had taken Donna combs home yesterday evening and got her situated and comfortable. Dr Cullen suggested Amanda stay with Elizabeth one more night and Donna didn't seem to mind. In fact, Donna was not hesitant at all.

This seemed odd to Amanda, but she didn't want to test a good thing so she went along with the situation. They had told Amanda it was so Donna could have a night of rest without having to worry about taking care of her. Amanda nearly laughed when she heard that. Donna never took care of her. She was on her own.

"Do you have your lunch bag?" Elizabeth checked as Amanda stepped out of the vehicle into the rain. Amanda held the fully loaded, brown bag up in her left hand and nodded.

"Well, then you have a good day. I will see you after school," Elizabeth told her pleasantly.

Amanda's head perked up at the words, but then she realized what Elizabeth had meant. She would see her after school at the clinic, but she would be going home to Donna's after that. Nothing had changed. Amanda nodded again and shut the door of the car. She began to tread toward the dark, brick building. A sorrowful sigh seeped from her body in self-pity. The only thing worse than having others feel sorry for her was feeling sorry for herself.

Elizabeth drove off to get to work while Amanda made her way back to class. It was amazing how one day away had really made her dread going back. The other students were staring as she put her lunch at the back of the room on the shelf. She didn't want to take off her coat off so she left it on and went to her desk to take a seat. She could feel eyes on her and she tried to cover her navy sling with Alice's jacket.

"I bet she stole that jacket too. It looks expensive!" Amanda heard girl's voices loudly whispering behind her as she settled at her desk. They continued to gossip behind Amanda's back, but she ignored them. It felt like the day she first came back after her mother's death. Everyone was talking about her, and not doing a good job of being discrete.

"Oh, she steals everything now. Pencils, clothing, and cars!" one voice said, it sounded like Stacey. Amanda fumed in her seat, but stayed focused on not giving the other kids any satisfaction by reacting to their cruel comments.

"Cars?!" another girl repeated.

"I heard she stole a car and crashed it into a building!" a different girl added.

"That's how she hurt her arm," Stacy's voice announced the rumor that must have been spreading about how she injured her arm. Amanda looked down at the sling in embarrassment. She hated showing weakness.

"And her mom got really hurt and had to stay at the doctor's all night!" some girl said, but it made Amanda's blood boil and she couldn't contain her rage any longer.

"SHE IS NOT MY MOTHER!" Amanda screamed at the top of her lungs. The mean girls had gone too far. Amanda felt her face turn red as she turned to glare at the back of the classroom. Stacey smiled smugly, but the other girls looked shocked by Amanda's outburst.

"Miss Peppel!" Mrs Brightman addressed her as she entered the room for the first time that morning. The class was running a bit behind schedule. Amanda turned back to the front of the class to face her teacher. She tried to hide her arm, her weak point that she felt everyone staring at.

"I could hear your voice from out in the hallway. That is too loud!" she scolded and then looked down at Amanda's arm. She must have heard the news of what had happened to Donna Combs and unlike the children; she more than likely had a better idea of what had actually gone on the other night.

Mrs Brightman sighed and added, "Please remember this is a classroom, Amanda. Shouting is for recess,"

Amanda scowled and sank down in her desk, but kept her mouth firmly shut to keep herself from screaming obscene words at Mrs Brightman. She was no less angry than usual, even with a full stomach and two nights of good sleep in her. It was almost like the strength she had gotten from staying with Elizabeth was fueling her to be angrier. She normally didn't have the will to put up a fight because she was so tired from malnutrition or lack of sleep.

However, Amanda pushed her rage aside and continued to ignore the staring and the harsh whispers that took place in her classroom that day. It would not do her any good to have a fit. She had many of those when her mother died, and it only seemed to make matters worse for her. Amanda's teacher last year would simple haul her out in to the hallway and make her sit out there alone until she calmed down.

Isolation was the very last thing she had needed back then. She would never have admitted it, then nor now, but she had wanted someone to console her and to tell her things would be okay. Even if it was just a lie, she could have used a bit of compassion at that time, but no one ever complied.

So, now she had become accustomed to the isolation. It was a familiar friend…if you could call loneliness a companion. It was her console now. Whenever she was upset, angry, or sad Amanda would close the world out. In a twisted way, it helped her deal with the pain.

*

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*

Carlisle and Alice were hunting together, but using their time apart from the rest of the Cullens to discuss what to do about Esme and Amanda.

"You need to tell her, Dad," Alice encouraged her father to tell Esme the truth about Amanda. Esme had the right to know Amy had not died in the forest of Challis, Idaho in 1971. Sure it would hurt her to find out she had killed herself in vain, but she still needed to know the truth. Amy had survived and went on to have a little girl of her own.

"I realize that. I just don't know how we should go about this. The moment she knows Amanda is Amy's little girl; she will want to meet her. I have no doubt in my mind about that,"

"I see that too," Alice informed him that he was correct about his assumption. So far Carlisle's mind was leaning toward telling Esme the truth so Alice saw that future playing out. He knew the moral thing to do was to tell her the truth. That she had a granddaughter who was alive.

"There is no way to explain to Amanda who Esme is to her. She will know that Esme is too young to be her grandmother," he rationalized out loud.

"Amanda is a tough kid, I am sure if we-" Alice began, but halted short before she suggested telling Amanda the truth about their immortal existence. Carlisle didn't need her to finish her sentence.

"I don't think that is wise. She may react badly. We don't want to endanger the child," Carlisle rationalized,thinking of the one rule that governed the vampire world. "Or endanger our own family," he added.

The Volturi, a power coven of vampires who enforced this rule were sure to seize the Cullen family if word got to them about a mortal child knowing of the existence of vampires. Aro, the leader so to speak, was a friend of Carlisle's but it was not often the Volturi made exceptions for acquaintances. Carlisle knew he could not count on their lenience.

"I can't see that far ahead right now. There is still too much change, too much indecision," Alice said with an apologetic tone.

"You have been wonderful, Alice. You can only see so much. Don't let this be a burden on you, my dear," Carlisle said, quietly, lurking carefully behind some trees as he pointed out a small herd of rams on a nearby ledge.

"It is just that…" Alice started to explain why she was so involved. Carlisle paused from his hunting and turned to his daughter. "I feel so protective of Amanda. I have since we moved here. Maybe it is just because I saw her crash the first day and something told me she needed to be watched over, but more than that…I sensed that she would come into our lives,"

"You saw her becoming part of our family?" Carlisle asked, stunned. Alice shook her head and then continued.

"No, I just had a feeling there was something different about this place and that a big change was coming. And it had nothing to do with any visions I have seen," she explained. The rams near by heard them talking and began to scattered away.

"Amanda certainly has drawn me in, as well," Carlisle admitted, "I noticed her scent the first time I met her and since then I have felt like I needed to help her. I know now that her scent was familiar because she is Esme's granddaughter. That much makes sense to me. I am certain Amanda holds no similar feelings towards me," Carlisle told Alice, chuckling as he finished the last line. He was well aware that Amanda was not his biggest fan. Alice smiled.

"She is not used to someone trying to help her. Your compassion that humans usually find so endearing, frightens her," Alice explained, "Give her time. She will come around,"

Carlisle took this thought and sighed as he made sense of it. He was quite often surprised by Alice's wisdom. She was so tiny and young looking he would often mistaken her for a child rather than the ninety-some year old vampire that she was.

"I think we may need to leave Kipta," he finally said the words he least wanted to say. Alice knew it was not what he wanted. Or what any of their family wanted, but she trusted Carlisle's judgment and respected him far too much to argue with any decision he planned to make.

The two of them completed their hunt in silence. They needed to hurry back home for school and work. Neither one of them chose to discuss the matter any further.

*

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*

With the end of another horrendous school day coming to a close, Amanda eyed the clock desperately. The second hand ticked in what seemed like slow motion and counting it's movement put Amanda in a trance. Mrs Brightman called on Amanda to get her attention, but Amanda was zeroed in on the wall hanging clock.

"Amanda!" Mrs Brightman repeated for the fourth time and she tapped the mesmerized child on the shoulder to get her attention. Amanda snapped out of her time warp and jumped in shock as she realized someone was touching her. A few students laughed behind her.

"Pay attention. I know you are having a rough day, but you still have to get your work completed before the bell rings," Mrs Brightman told Amanda pointing to the board, "All eight of those questions need to be written into your notebook and then completed as homework for tomorrow,"

Amanda nodded quickly and got her pencil out and put it in her right hand. She felt her cheeks get warm with anger and embarrassment for the way her teacher had drawn attention to her.

Amanda struggled to keep her elbow immobile in the sling as she wrote what was on the front board down in her notebook without moving her arm too much. She got frustrated and tried angrily to undo the strap of the sling. She couldn't quite get it off and she gave up seeing as class was nearly over and everyone was packing to leave.

The bell rang moments later and she looked up. The rest of the class was dismissed but she was not nearly close to finishing. She sighed and got back to copying the notes. Amanda could feel her teacher approaching and she tensed up, ready to bite back if Mrs Brightman gave her any grief. But that was not the case.

"Here," Mrs Brightman said softly, "Let me write those out for you,"

The teacher bent down beside Amanda's desk and took out a pencil and quickly jotted down the lines. It only took her a minute to finish. Amanda was amazed. She had thought for sure she would be staying late after school.

When Mrs Brightman finished she closed Amanda's booklet and turned to the child.

"These questions are still due tomorrow at the beginning of class. No excuses, Amanda. Do you understand?"

"Yes," Amanda agreed. Mrs Brightman smiled with sincere care.

"I hope your arm will be better soon,"

"I get to take this off today," Amanda volunteered some personal information lifting her slung arm slightly. She made up her mind that she was not wearing the sling again to school. No matter what Elizabeth or Dr Cullen told her.

"Good for you. If it hurts too much to write, though, you can have someone write out your answers for you. I will allow that this once," the teacher offered kindly. She knew Donna Combs and she knew the type of men that she brought home. Her sympathy for Amanda was genuine. Amanda hated being impaired so she shook her head stubbornly.

"I can do it myself. My arm is feeling better," Amanda insisted. Mrs Brightman smiled again and then stood up. She was aware of Amanda's afternoon agenda.

"I am glad. You should hurry off. You don't want to keep Dr Cullen waiting,"

"Okay," Amanda whispered and she slid out of her seat with her notebook clutched in her left hand. She was surprised her teacher was being so patient with her. She normally hated pity, but in this case she accepted it and bit her tongue.

*

*

*

"It is just the common cold, Mrs Fromms. Get some rest and drink plenty of fluids. You can take Tylenol if you are feeling any discomfort that disrupts your rest, but they only thing you can do is wait it out," Carlisle explained to his most reoccurring patient. Mrs Fromms was a hypochondriac. This was her fifth visit to see Dr Cullen in two weeks.

"But what if I develop Pneumonia?" the middle aged woman asked, visibly concerned she might catch a pulmonary infection.

"I think that is highly unlikely. You simply need rest, Mrs Fromms," Carlisle said with the utmost patience.

"But what if I-" she began. Carlisle smiled and put on his charm.

"I will be here if you need me. You have the phone number and if you have an concerns I will be happy to help you," he offered. She seemed to relax and take his words seriously. She nodded and reluctantly left the practice. Elizabeth smiled in a friendly manner as Mrs Fromms headed out the door and when the coast was clear she swiftly turned to Carlisle.

"Wow! You do realize I am going to be bombarded with phone calls from that woman, don't you?" Elizabeth asked with a playful chuckled. Carlisle was not in a great state of mind, what with finding out his wife has a biological granddaughter that she didn't know about. He made is best effort to make chit chat with Elizabeth.

"I hope you will forgive me," he said calmly, with lack of humor. Elizabeth's grin faded. She knew something was bothering the young doctor. Carlisle paused and looked out into the street. He could see Amanda walking up the sidewalk towards him now. He was beginning to think it was best to leave before Amanda had the chance to figure out Esme is her grandmother.

"Is something wrong Dr Cullen?" Elizabeth asked out of concern. She knew something was troubling him.

"I am not sure," he answered sincerely. He couldn't tell her what was really going on, but he didn't want to lie if it was possible.

"Do you want to talk about what is bothering you? Maybe I can help," Elizabeth offered. Carlisle dropped his head briefly at her kind offer and wished he could share with her. Elizabeth Roth had become a good friend to him in only a short period of time. And now he was contemplating packing up his family and leaving town. _'How will I explain that to Liz?'_ he wondered to himself, lifting his head to smile in her direction.

"Thank you, Liz. It is kind of you to offer, but it is something I need to sort out on my own," he told his kind-hearted secretary. In many ways she reminded him of Esme. They were both such warm, loving people. He had hoped the two of them could be friends one day. That may not be a possibility now if his decision to move came to term.

"Oh, here come Amanda," Elizabeth announced as Amanda grew near enough for her human sight to capture. "She is itching to take off that sling, but I told her she had to keep it on until you okayed its removal,"

"She sure is something," Carlisle let out one short laugh.

"Stubborn girl. Her elbow is still hurting her, but she won't admit it. She will try to hide it from you I'm sure. She is determined to take that thing off today whether or not you allow it," she explained quickly as Amanda made her way up the two steps to the glass door. Carlisle stepped up and opened it for her. She walked in slowly, with a suspicious glare set in her eyes.

"What?" Amanda inquired imprudently looking at Carlisle first, then at Elizabeth.

*

*

*

Amanda was feeling pretty good as she walked down the sidewalk towards Main Street. She was warm in Alice's jacket and full of Elizabeth's home made lunch and her teacher had been uncharacteristically kind to her this afternoon.

She crossed the street at the end of Maple Avenue to the other side of Main and then carried on to the clinic. She could see Dr Cullen in the lobby as she walked by the bay window and her mood shifted. She was not looking forward to dealing with the perfect man who she loathed so unreasonably. Something about him made her feel uneasy. Like he was hiding something from her.

Amanda walked up the two steps towards the glass front door and as she reached to grab the handle, it opened inward. She stepped in slowly and noticed Dr Cullen holding the door for her, looking down at her with a gentle smile that she didn't understand. Then she noticed Elizabeth watching her in silence too.

"What?" Amanda asked, sure that they had been talking about her behind her back. She couldn't help but glare sideways at the white-coated figure that had held the door for her on her way inside.

"That is not how you greet a person, Amanda. Why don't you try that again?" Elizabeth reprimanded lightly. Amanda sighed and tightened her lips for a moment, but she responded to Elizabeth's request and she offered a half-hearted greeting.

"Hell-o!" she said in a low, deep tone, not looking at either of them.

"Good afternoon, Amanda," Carlisle said pleasantly. Amanda didn't say a word to him and looked to the front desk instead.

"Hello, Dear. How was school today?" Elizabeth asked cheerfully, hoping to move on from Amanda's rude entrance.

"Just great!" Amanda sarcastically answered. She stepped to the side of the high counter and stood next to Elizabeth. She looked down and hugged her self with her left arm and fiddling with the strap on her sling. "Hey…Can I take this thing off now?"

"That is up to Dr Cullen," Elizabeth answered Amanda with a stern warning on her face, "You need to ask him," Amanda cringed very subtly and then turned to the handsome doctor who was not at all shocked by her sour behavior. She had never shown a liking to him. He waited patiently for her to ask him the question. He could see she was struggling to spit out the words.

"Well? Can I take this off yet?" she bluntly questioned. It was on the verge of rude.

"Amanda!" Elizabeth gasped quietly.

"What? I asked him!" Amanda said innocently, her eyes wide and her mouth parted open a bit after she spoke. Elizabeth shook her head in disappointment. Carlisle stepped forward and addressed Amanda kindly.

"I would be happy to take a look at your arm, Amanda,"

"Can't I just take this off? My arm does not hurt anymore!" she exclaimed impatiently, not wanting to be fussed over. Carlisle smiled and simply shook his head.

"I have to take a look before I allow you to remove the sling. To make sure your ligaments have healed properly,"

Amanda sighed and grumbled, "fine!"

"Good girl. Let's go take a look, shall we?" he said, not asking, but telling her to follow him down the hallway. Amanda huffed and followed Carlisle's lead to the first exam room. He reached out to lift her up but she backed away and swatted at him with her left hand.

"I can do it," she stated coolly, and then crawled up on the table using the stool and her left hand to hoist her up. With a hop and turn she managed to get her bum on the edge and then she wiggled back. Her legs dangled below her.

"How was your arm feeling today? Is it still sore?" Carlisle asked Amanda as he removed the Velcro straps from around the child's shoulder and then slid the casing off and to the side carefully.

"No," Amanda lied. Carlisle sensed she was not being honest. He raised his eyes to her face to see if she would give in and tell the truth. But Amanda was a pro when it came to hiding her emotions. She had already made up her mind she would not be going to school with the navy blue sling again. She didn't need it!

"How does this feel?" Carlisle asked as he gently bent Amanda's arm in at the joint and then slowly extended it to a straight position.

'_Ow, ow, ow!'_ Amanda thought in bane, but she grit her teeth inside her mouth and kept a straight face.

"Good," she fibbed, no expression on her face. Carlisle could feel her pulse speed as her body registered the pain and her heart rate increased. It was not able to lie as well as she could.

"Are you sure this is not hurting you?" He asked one more time, extending her arm again as carefully as he could. He didn't want to cause Amanda pain. He hoped she would be honest this time.

"I'm sure," she lied convincingly again. Carlisle sighed and put her arm down.

"I want to help you, Amanda. I can't do that if you are not going to be honest with me,"

"My arm is fine. Can I go now?" she asked curtly. There was a pause and the two of them stared at each other in a showdown.

"I suppose so," Carlisle sighed, not knowing how to deal with the stubborn girl. She was determined to be difficult so he backed away as she jumped off the table. Without a glance she walked out and got on with her chores. Elizabeth caught Carlisle's eye as he exited the exam room and she shrugged in an attempted to apologize for Amanda's behavior.

*

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*

Hours later, after Amanda had already left to go home, Elizabeth was finishing up for the day and getting ready to leave the office.

"Are you working late?" she casually asked Carlisle as she walked up to his open office door and stepped her body half way inside. He was putting some of his personal items in a box. This confused her slightly, but she didn't want to pry.

"I am just tidying up a bit. I will be heading home shortly," he told her.

"Do you want any help?"

"No, thank you. You may leave. I can lock up tonight on my own," he offered and smiled kindly at his assistant. He didn't want to leave the practice. He could not be assured that a new physician in his place would hire her and he felt like he owed Elizabeth an explanation for why he was packing up some of his things. But for the time being, he kept to himself.

"Okay. I will see you tomorrow then," Elizabeth answered as she left him to his clean up. She headed to the front doors.

Just as she was about leave, she noticed Amanda's notebook sitting on one of the chairs in the lobby. She reached for it and flipped to the last page. There were a list of questions that Mrs Brightman had written out for Amanda and the date they were due to be completed.

Seeing that the homework was incomplete and Amanda was without her notebook, Elizabeth slipped it in her large purse. She decided she would stop by Donna's house to return the book so Amanda could finish her assignment for to next day. She was sure, like other things in Amanda's life, schoolwork was not high on the list of priorities. Elizabeth, however, was invested in helping Amanda reach her full potential.

Elizabeth got into her little, red car and drove off toward Donna Combs' place.

*

*

*

At first, she had seen it so clearly; Amanda going home to find an empty, gutted house with no sign of Donna Combs and the doors locked up firmly. Next, Alice saw Amanda's face as it recognized her own abandonment. Then, she witnessed Amanda take off running into the dense, dark forest of Kipta as the twilight of the setting sun hid behind the mountains in the distance.

It all went blank….Alice couldn't see anything more of Amanda's future.

"Daddy!" she shouted, without thinking. In seconds, the whole household was by her side, curious to what she had seen. Carlisle knew from Alice's worried expression and delay to share with the group that it had to be about Amanda.

Alice had no choice. She had to tell the family what was going on. They could keep Esme from finding out about Amanda, she was hopeful of that, but she had to try to help the little girl. Alice could still see Amanda's face as it realized that Donna had packed up and absconded without her. It was the final blow to an already damaged soul.

"Amanda took off towards the woods. I don't know where she is or where she is going! I can't see her future anymore," she explained, looking only to Carlisle. Esme gasped. She had never met Amanda, but she knew of her and she knew how dangerous the forest was for a child to be lost in. Her own past clung in her memory and made Esme quiver in internal turmoil.

The sun was still out, behind the clouds, closing in on the horizon. Carlisle began to give orders.

"Alice and Jasper can go North and circle back coming East. Rose and Emmet will go South West. I am going to see if I can find her before she leaves town," he said at such a speed that no human would have been able to understand. His family had heard him loud and clear and had already moved to do as they were told. Esme stared, wide eyed, at her husband.

"Esme, love, you stay here. You are home base unless one of us calls and tells you otherwise," he told her, hoping she would not be offended not to be in on the search party. She nodded and understood. She considered that she might still be a threat to Amanda. Esme had found out the guest Alice had seen coming a few nights ago was Amanda and she had been whisked away so she would not harm the child.

This is the story Esme still believed, of course. If she knew how very untrue this plot was, she would demand to know why she was not able to go near Amanda.

*

*

*

Amanda had been in a foul mood since her encounter with Dr Cullen that afternoon. She was able to make it through the afternoon, getting her chores done at the clinic, without talking to him again. Her arm ached mildly, but she didn't mind. As long as she didn't lean on it too hard or extend it fully, it didn't hurt.

She had won her battle to get the sling off. That is what she cared about. Now no one at school would be staring at her, she thought foolishly. As she rounded the corner onto Birch Street, she had the nagging feeling that her day was about to turn for the worse.

There was something oddly different about the dirty, little house with a yard full of weeds that made Amanda's stomach flip. It looked empty. She ran to the door and pulled, but it didn't open. She was confused, since Donna was always home and never locked the front door.

Amanda peered into the grungy window beside the door and her stomach dropped. Her face went pale because without really knowing yet what had happened, subconsciously she understood what she was seeing was life changing. Amanda hurried to the large, front window and looked in it too, only to find the same thing….

Nothing.

The house inside was bare. There was no couch and no television set. All that was left was piles of junk that Donna had collected over the years and was too lazy to ever clean up. Now, it had all be left behind. And so had Amanda.

At first, Amanda thought to go to Tyler's house. She could stay with him until Donna was found or came back home. But she knew it was suppertime and she could picture Tyler and his parents sitting around their table, laughing and having a good time. She didn't fit in there. She didn't want to ruin Tyler's life by being a complication to him.

So, she went to each window to be sure, but every room was void of Donna's furnishings. Lastly, she looked into her bedroom window. Her mattress was still there, and so was her dresser. It was the only room Donna had not clear out. Amanda gulped back the lump in her throat. Reality began to take hold of her and instead of crying she stood and began to run!

Running made her feel like she was getting somewhere. She didn't know where, she didn't know what she was going to do, but the act of running, was something at least. She headed towards the towns' edge and entered into the dense forest. Not sure what her next move was going to be.

*

*

*

Elizabeth drove up to Donna Comb's house just as the murky sunset was falling over the horizon. She got out of her car causally and walked passed the tall grass mingled with copious amounts of weeds. The state of the yard was telling of Donna's neglect.

She got to the front door and knocked, surprised by the strange echo it made inside the house. She bent her head to look inside, squinting her eyes through the side window. _'What the Hell? Did Donna move?'_ she thought as she saw the empty room.

She tried the doorknob. It didn't turn. Then she went to look into the other rooms of the house. She found the same things. The house had been abandoned. It took her less time than it had for Amanda to realize what had happened.

"You looking for Ms Combs?" a voice called to Elizabeth. A feeble, woman in a nightgown and hair in rollers was standing in the next yard over.

"Yes. Yes! Do you know where she is?" Elizabeth shouted urgently, not taking her hand off the side door she had been trying to shake open only moments earlier.

"No. She left this morning before noon. Packed up in an old pick up truck and took off," the woman shared.

"Did she say where she was going? Is she coming back?"

"I don't know deary. She seemed to be in a hurry. She was all banged up looking. I'd say she was trying to get away. I don't think we will see her again,"

The old woman's words were Elizabeth's thoughts exactly, but hearing them made the reality more alarming. She looked back at the door and waited a few seconds until her rage got the better of her.

"That heartless Bitch!" Elizabeth screamed as she pounded on the door. She realized that the older woman was still watching her. She didn't care. She was enraged at Donna Combs for leaving town.

"The little girl…" the woman said meekly. Elizabeth's head lifted up at the mention of Amanda. "Donna was alone. The child was not with her. Do you think she is okay?"

"I am not sure. I …I just don't know," was all that Elizabeth could say to respond. She had no idea where Amanda was and the thought sent fear racing down her spine.


	10. Lost & Found

**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Ten**

|Lost & Found|

"I think I'm onto something!" Emmet called over to Rosalie as they made their way through the Southern woods surrounding the town of Kipta. Rosalie slowed her own pace and zipped to Emmet's side and smelled the area carefully around him.

"That is not Amanda's scent!" she exclaimed hotly.

"Really? It smells so familiar. I was sure--"

"That is because it is Mom's scent, you great moron!" Rosalie snapped impatiently at him, "She went out today to pick the remaining wild flowers before the chill sets in,"

"How I am supposed to remember that?" he asked defensively.

"Oh, forget it! Let's keep looking. It is dark now and it is too dangerous for a little girl to be out at night all alone," Rosalie reasoned and tugged on Emmet's arm to get him from smelling the tree trunks surrounded by white baby's breath and purple foxglove, shriveling in the coolness of the fall weather.

"Okay, Babe," he agreed to move on, but he was still sure that he had been onto something. The scent was off slightly, but he was certain that he was on the right trail somehow.

They took off again, running at a good speed, sniffing the air in hopes to pick up Amanda's scent.

Emmet was along for the ride. He was always game to participate in anything the family was into so he didn't mind helping to search for the little girl. He didn't even think of why it was so important to his vampire family to help this one particular child. He just figured it was one of Carlisle and Alice's good deeds that they were forever extending to humans.

Rosalie on the other hand, was thinking more logically. She knew that Alice had been keeping a secret from her for days now. Alice was never very good at withholding information. Rosalie could tell that something was making Alice antsy and not in her usual elfin way.

'_What is so God damn special about Amanda that we are out here searching for her? We could just call the Sheriff!'_ Rose thought to herself as she combed the wooded area. She didn't mind Amanda, and did feel a bit more connected to her than any other human because she had saved her from drowning, but Rosalie was not impressed at the center stage Amanda was taking in her family's circle at the moment. She felt it was dangerous to become too involved.

Rosalie was not happy about Amanda encroaching on her family's lives, but she was not cold-hearted enough to not be concerned for Amanda's well being. If it were her child lost in the woods she would hope that there would be someone out searching like they were doing for Amanda.

"Nothing over here…I think we have gone too far, Rose," Emmet spoke up after minutes of intense searching. He was probably correct. They had traveled so far south that they were closing in on the Sheraton Indian Reserves.

"Let's go back then…and West as Dad suggested," Rosalie agreed, her face full of intensity. Emmet read her facial expression as concern.

"Don't worry, Babe. We'll find her,"

"Then what?" Rosalie asked huffily. She had the suspicion that Amanda would not being going back to Donna Combs's after this incident. A run away child is not something taken lightly. "That pixie-freak better not think we are going to take in that human stray!"

*

*

*

"Still nothing?!" Jasper asked Alice as they speedily raced passed the dark trees with graceful agility. He was expecting Alice to pick up a glimpse of Amanda's future to guide them in their search, but Alice was still unable to pick up anything concrete.

He was just as concerned for Amanda as Alice was. He hated to see her so worried like she was now and had been for the last few days. He felt she was stressed by something and was keeping it a secret. He accepted this and knew Alice would have her reasons. Jasper trusted Alice absolutely.

"She's is too upset. She changes her mind set every few minutes. I have no idea what she is planning or where she is headed. She was going to stop and sit down. I thought we could perhaps find her then if she was motionless for a time, but she changed her mind. She changed her path. I don't know which way! It was too dark to see and Amanda is not sure where she is either," Alice ranted at top speed.

"She will settle down soon. She must be getting tired," Jasper offered. Alice frowned. She knew Jasper was being rational and that they would find Amanda soon. With five vampires out looking for her, the odds were in that favor. However, she was not used to this level of uncertainty in her visions.

"Amanda must be so upset. She is not thinking clearly. I hope she is all right," Alice admitted gently as the pair of them came to a stop at the Northeast part of Babine Lake. Jasper carefully scanned the nearby area and shook his head to let her know there was no sign of Amanda there as well. Alice knew as much already.

"Alice…Sweetheart?" Jasper was quiet and serious for a moment. "I don't want to pry, but if you could spare some details to what this search is all about, why Esme is not in on the search, perhaps we could all be better suited to find the child,"

Alice sighed and longed to tell him the whole story. Keeping anything from her Jasper was unimaginably difficult for her to do. They had no secrets from one another.

In an instant, Alice sank into a blurry, vision. Amanda, sketchy in the dark of night, was at the lake house, placing the Marc Jacob's coat on the front steps of the house, returning it. And as she turned to run away again the door opened and the light poured out from the inside of the front foyer and streamed down the front driveway, spotlighting Amanda.

She turned to face the light and her eyes widened. There stood Esme, in a white, silk evening dress. Amanda staggered back, uncertain, but not yet afraid.

_"__Amy?"_ Esme's whispered eerily.

"Alice? Is everything okay? Please tell me?" Jasper asked carefully as Alice blinked herself away from the ghostly vision. She was whiter in the moonlight, but it could have been from shock if she were human enough to experience that state. Alice turned her startled face to Jasper's.

"We have a problem…" she began.

*

*

*

Amanda could not feel her legs any more. They were too immersed in a sprint. She feared to stop because she was sure she would fall down. And she didn't want to stand still. The pain and self-loathing would take her over again.

She blamed herself for this mess. Like she blamed herself for her mother's death.

Amanda wished she could have been better behaved, better at school, prettier. Anything more than she was now. Maybe then, her mother would have wanted to live. And then maybe…she would not be in this situation right now.

But the maybes didn't help Amanda as she ran aimlessly through the darkness, tripping on branches and ripping her clothes. The jacket she adored so much was getting dirty. The one item that had significantly made a difference in her life the last few days was beginning to fall apart as well. Amanda came to a slamming halt with this realization.

Luckily for her, there was a glow of light from the distance. A house, it looked like, and as she began to run toward it the house revealed itself to her. It was like it was meant to be. Amanda could not have planned this better herself. She had never been on this trail before, so to find the lake house was fortuitous.

She began to unzip the jacket as she jogged, her legs felt like pegs beneath her. She wanted to give back Alice's coat before she continued on her journey. This seemed like a good idea to Amanda who didn't want to steal anything more by accident; especially from Alice, who she quite liked and had been so kind to her.

The house seemed to emerge quickly before her as she ran. She had the jacket half removed as she scurried as quietly as she could to the front steps of the house. She would just leave the coat on the front steps and hope that they found it before the weather turned too nasty and ruined it worse than she already had.

As Amanda slipped her sore, right arm from the warm sleeve she shuddered. It was bittersweet to leave the lovely borrowed gift when she could have really used it now. She was homeless, she figured. And although she was not apposed to freezing to death as an option, Amanda's instincts told her that she should fight to stay alive and ditching the warm vessel was a mistake.

None-the-less, Amanda dropped the designer coat at the front door and backtracked towards the trees again. She heard a click behind her and suddenly there was a long shadow of herself stretching in front of her. Yellow light lit the path entrapping the black figured shadow and Amanda spun to see where it was coming from.

In the doorway of the magnificent mansion was a woman trapped in the bright light shining outwards into the night. She was wearing a white dress that flowed around her and stopped at her knees. The woman's face was hard to see with the light hitting the back of her, but Amanda recognized the beautiful woman.

It was the woman from her dreams. Amanda gawked and nearly fell backwards as she attempted to stable herself to get a better look. She was a bit scared now, but wasn't sure if she should run from the woman she had always thought was her mother's angel.

"Amy?" a voice echoed softly, like music, from the light.

*

*

*

Carlisle left his car at home and hurried into town on foot. He made his way to Donna Combs' home. He already had the feeling he was too late, with the sun gone behind the mountains already. Sure enough, there was no one at the pitiful shack, called a home, when he arrived.

He went over to the house to pick up Amanda's scent, hoping he would be able to follow it to where she was currently. As he round the house, looking inside to make sure Amanda had not snuck back inside, he tried to get a good idea of which direction Amanda had taken.

A familiar smell mingled with the surroundings and with the fading scent that Amanda had left at the house. Carlisle knew its origin right way. He knew that Elizabeth must have been at the house not too long ago and was probably trying to find Amanda as well.

Just then, bright headlights flashed on the side of the house. A red Firefly pulled up fast and screeched to a stop. Carlisle jogged at a human's pace to the vehicle as his red-haired assistant stepped out.

"She's gone!" Elizabeth yelled out frantically as Carlisle reached her.

"I know. My family is out searching for her right now," he explained and she gripped Elizabeth's arms to steady her. She looked about ready to fall apart.

"I tried to call the office to ask you if she came back there. You had already left. I tried your cell too, but you didn't pick up!" she hurried over her words, not taking a breath. He looked at his phone and sure enough there was a missed call. He must have left it on silent from his workday. It was set to ring now.

"I'm sorry I did not answer my cell. We were preoccupied with the news when she had gone missing. We having been searching for her. I am sorry you have been so worried," Carlisle tried to console Elizabeth. She nodded frantically.

"I checked Tyler Davis' house, he hasn't seen or heard from her. His parents are out searching the neighborhood as well. She is not at the school. She is not at the office. I went back to my place, hoping she would come to me…but she didn't and I thought maybe she would come back here and ..and…" Elizabeth spoke quickly, heaving in the night air in between each sentence.

"We'll find her, Liz. Don't worry,"

"She is just a little girl. And it is cold and she is out there…all alone,"

"I know…I know," Carlisle soothed Elizabeth softly, his words like gentle puffs of air, "We will find her. She won't have gone far. I am certain we will find her,"

Elizabeth began to calm down with his words, hoping that the brilliant doctor was correct. He was so sure that Amanda would be found safe she wanted to believe him.

Then his phone rang from inside his hand and he let go of her arms to answer it. Elizabeth waited impatiently to hear what was being said on the other end. It took whoever was on the other end only seconds to get their message to Carlisle. His face could not hide his concern and it made Elizabeth fear the worst.

"Oh, God, no!" she exhaled. Carlisle put his hand on her shoulder as he shut his phone. He was not so sure how it would turn out, but Alice's instructions on over the phone to him were as follows:

"Amanda is heading to the house…Esme will see her. Bring Elizabeth with you!" she had demanded of him. Alice knew what she was doing. Carlisle believed that.

"My wife has spotted Amanda. She was at my house," Carlisle explained.

"Oh, thank God!" Elizabeth let out a sigh of relief. She had no idea how much worse this scenario was than it seemed. For Carlisle and his family, anyhow.

"Would you please give me a ride home?" Carlisle asked already ushering Elizabeth towards her driver's door and opening it for her. It would be faster than going on foot. He couldn't risk running through town at his natural pace in case a resident saw him.

"Of course, let's go!" she answered without hesitation and slid into her seat as he shut the door behind her.

*

*

*

'_Mom?' _Amanda questioned herself, confused. She felt like she might have lost her mind. There was no way her mother could be standing there, alive.

She thought she might be dreaming. The forest in her dreams was always in the day light, but the figure standing before her now was the very same. The white dress, angelic face, and soft graceful features of the woman in the doorway were just the same.

She had always thought it was her mom in her dreams, but now Amanda was not so sure. As the woman very carefully drew nearer, Amanda felt frightened. She couldn't seem to get her legs to move. They were stiff underneath her. She was only able to watch the woman in white come towards her with the same curiousness she felt.

'_Perhaps she is a ghost. She sure is pale enough. Or she really is an angel,'_ Amanda thought to herself as Esme approached her. The light behind her now was not so blatant and Amanda could see her Esme's face more clearly.

It was not her mother. Amanda could see that now. There was no mistaking the two. This woman had fuller lips than her mother had, and was a bit shorter. Also, her eyes were an odd golden color. But the face shape was just as her own was... heart-shaped and symmetrical. Her eyes were perfectly set apart and her nose was dainty between them and her luscious, full lips.

Esme was determining the same explanation as Amanda. She could see now that this was not her daughter Amy, but she still felt that the child before her was her kin. Amanda looked like Amy had when she was a kid. Only Amanda was a lot thinner with grey circles under her large, tired eyes.

'_She is around the same age as Amy was when she went missing,'_ Esme decided. She was partly relieved it was not her daughter, although she had always dreamt of seeing her again. Esme was glad this child in front of her was a human. And not Amy's ghost or worse…some immortal version of her beloved daughter.

"You must be Amanda," she finally spoke. She knew from Amanda's frail appearance and worn clothing that this was the child her Alice had been watching over since they had arrived in Kipta. This was the same girl that Carlisle had taken in at his medical practice. The child who had crashed a car though his lobby window.

It dawned on Esme how she knew nothing more than the child's name and her neglectful passed. None of her family who had met Amanda had ever mentioned the resemblance she had to her own daughter and herself. But Esme didn't focus on this thought. After all, she had not liked to talk about Amy and only kept a few photos of her little girl in her jewelry box.

"I…I…" Amanda stuttered as she began to get very afraid. Esme was only a few feet away from her now and looking more and more ethereal than Amanda had ever dreamed. The moonlight glistened off of Esme's skin and made her appear snow white in its reflection.

"Don't be frightened, Darling. My name is Esme. I am Dr Cullen's wife," she spoke at a whisper. She couldn't stop herself from staring at Amanda's tired eyes and notice how lovely she was in spite of the abuse her body had been through.

'_Impossible!'_ Esme thought, shaking a number of reasons for Amanda and Amy's strong resemblance. As she grew closer to Amanda, she caught her scent and she gasped and dropped to her knees and reached out. _'No…my Amy is dead. This can't be happening!' _It was like she could feel Amy in her arms again. The nostalgia was overbearing.

Amanda stepped back from Esme's hand in fear, it had been inches away from her cheek. As she placed her foot behind her, it caught on the curb of the driveway and Amanda tripped. She fell down hard, her arms stretched out behind her to catch her fall. Her right arm took the brunt of the slam into the pavement and she yelped. Shooting pain shot from her elbow towards her shoulder and her wrist. It stopped as she hugged her arm to her body tightly.

"No no…stay back! Stay away from me!" Amanda pleaded as Esme moved forward to help her up. She kicked at the cement as she tried to push herself away from the woman in white that she was now sure was real. Amanda realized she was not dreaming this time.

"I am so sorry, Amanda. Please. Let me help you. Carlisle and the kids are all out looking for you, but I will call them and tell them you are safe. And I can make you some warm tea," Esme offered, "How about we go inside?"

"No. I can't. I have to go," Amanda spoke, her voice cracking on the crisp air. She got herself standing again, her arm was only aching mildly now. The pain had subsided and she didn't waste any time. Amanda's legs were still tingling and numb from excursion, but her mind told her to run again and so she did.

"Amanda! Please! Come back!" Esme called out, starting to go after her. However, Esme stopped herself. She was supposed to stay at the house for a reason. And she was now very aware that her family had been keeping Amanda away from her. That much was clear…

'_But why?' _Esme wondered as she watched Amanda run toward the lake. She didn't go after her. She had to find out why Alice had lied to her. There was nothing about Amanda that made Esme feel out of control._ 'So, why did Alice lie to me that day when Amanda was coming to the house? Why did I have to be taken away that day if there was no danger to Amanda? What is my family hiding from me?'_

_*_

_*_

_*_

"I still can't believe this!" Jasper exclaimed as he and Alice made their way back home. Alice had seen Amanda leaving her jacket at the lake house and then had proceeded to tell Jasper the whole truth.

"I know, but every word of it is true. Dad and I did the research," Alice confirmed as they ran in sync through the woods, dodging trees elegantly and effortlessly.

"Amanda is Mom's granddaughter?" Jasper said, not as a questioned, but to hear himself say it. He was trying to make sense of the story Alice had just told him.

"Mom does not know yet. We were not sure how to tell her,"

"She will find out soon…I don't think we will make it back to the house in time to stop their meeting," he said as they hurried along at top speed. They were only moments away from home at this point. Alice knew they were too late when she saw Amanda on the run again in her mind.

"Yes, we are too late," she explained, "Amanda took off again,"

Only this time Amanda was not so uncertain of where she was going. Alice saw it clearly as Amanda chose her resting place for the night. Jasper could tell how Alice was feeling and she was not as worried about the child now so he didn't badger Alice for details.

Alice and Jasper, Rosalie and Emmet all met up back at the house at the same time.

"We didn't find her. Did you two have any luck? Alice?" Rosalie asked as they all flew in to the front driveway and stopped in front of the huge garage.

"No, but Alice saw her. She was here," Jasper explained to Rosalie and Emmet.

"She WAS?" Rosalie asked, emphasizing the passed tense.

"She saw Mom and was scared off. She took off down the trail. She will be fine. I know where she is," Alice shared her visions with her siblings. Rosalie's eyes grew hard with annoyance.

"Scared? Of Mom?" Rosalie inquired, not seeing how Esme could look threatening in any light. Esme was the warmest, gentlest vampire she had ever met. Rosalie had never known a more loving, maternal person, even in her human life. It seemed silly to picture Amanda, the tough kid with an attitude, being scared of their sweet mother.

"Did Mom try to bite her?" Emmet asked in a dopey loud voice. Rosalie smacked the back of his head in reflex.

"Don't be an idiot! Of course not!" she scolded him as he rubbed the back of his head and messed his thick, dark curls.

"Alice Cullen, I need to speak with you right away!" Esme's voice rang out with authority above them all. There was silence. It was like being called down to the principal's office. None of the Cullen kids ever wanted to disappoint Esme or Carlisle. Alice stepped forward.

Esme was standing by the house, arms folded across her chest, a disciplinary edge to her beautiful voice spoke out again.

"I think you have some explaining to do, young lady," she announced. Esme knew that Alice had lied to her about Amanda being a temptation and she wanted to know the reason behind it.

"Yes, Mom," Alice complied, scooting over to her mother with her head hung in shame. She felt so much guilt for keeping a secret from her mother, that Jasper felt like he was in the wrong too even though he had only just found out about Amanda being Esme's granddaughter.

"What is going on?" Emmet blurted out impatiently. Rosalie grabbed his hand and squeezed it in a gesture of warning. He took the hint and shut his mouth. The three older kids huddled together as they waited to hear Alice's explanation.

The sound of chugging broke up the quiet and everyone turned to look for the vehicle that was making its was to up the drive. Esme relaxed her arms and let go of some of the tension she was carrying as she saw her husband in the passenger seat next to his assistant.

Alice was relieved. They were right on time. She could now point them in the right direction to finding Amanda and everything would work out. The car jerked to a stop and the doors flew open. Both Carlisle and Elizabeth got out and ran over to the waiting Cullen family.

"Where is she?" Carlisle asked first.

"Is she hurt? Can I see her?" Elizabeth questioned before anyone could answer Carlisle's. Her compassion for Amanda was clear in how she cared for the little girl. Esme liked this about Elizabeth and would have smiled if the mood was not so harried.

"She is okay. She is down by the first beach. Adjacent to the dock is a large, weeping willow. She is up in there. I thought it was best for you to get her down," Alice shared, looking to Elizabeth at her last sentence. She foresaw Elizabeth being able to talk Amanda out of the tree with very little trouble.

There were more than a few sighs heard around the crowd. Elizabeth didn't seem to find herself the odd one out in a group of stunningly gorgeous vampires. In fact, she didn't seem to notice anything out of the ordinary at all. She immediately looked to Carlisle to see if he was going to follow her as she started down the hill towards the lake.

"I will be home soon," Carlisle whispered to his family. He could read the tension on all their faces; and the concern they all had for both Amanda and also for his wife. He knew right away by Alice's large, worried eyes, that Esme must have met Amanda tonight.

"Mom, I will tell you everything. I promise," Alice said, so Carlisle could hear and know that the secret was out. Elizabeth was ahead of him, already half way down the slop to the shore when he heard this. Carlisle turned to face his wife for a moment.

"I am so sorry, my love. Just know that I only kept this from you to save you from the pain. I love you," Carlisle whispered into the wind. Esme tilted her head and smiled faintly. She was not angry with him at all. She only wanted to know the truth.

*

*

*

Amanda had successfully managed to climb the thick trunk of the willow tree with only one good arm. The base of the tree was slanted slightly and has a few nubs where she could place her feet and use as a stepping ladder. She then crawled up a few branched and sat into the hallowed curve of the large tree, hugging her knees to her chest.

This was the same tree that she and Tyler had always wanted to build a tree house in, but they never were able to find the time to make that happen. Amanda had always had the thought of sleeping in it if times ever got too tough at Donna's. So, even without the tree house built, she felt slightly comforted to be nestled in the tree, high up off the ground.

She felt hidden in a sense. And oddly safe, even though it would not be hard for anyone else to climb the tree behind her and come after her. She was only about five and a half feet off the ground. Not that Amanda expected anyone to be looking for her. She pretty much figured she would have to go it alone from now on.

Then, Amanda thought about the woman in white that she had recently ran away from. Amanda's stomach flipped inside her. She began to wonder if she had done the right thing. So many times in her dreams she had chased this woman and tried to catch up to her. She had begged that woman to not leave her.

So, now she was not sure if running away and giving up on the woman in white was such a good idea. She had finally caught up to her. She had finally found her. Even though the woman in white was clearly not her mother, Amanda felt the strangest lure toward her still.

'_Why did you have to run away?!'_ she demanded of herself, _'You finally got what you had been searching for and you ran away!'_

Amanda was furious with herself. She was used to blaming herself for all the things that happened in her life. She was the one who always made the bad choices. She was the one who let her mother die. She could have been a better girl. Then her mother would have wanted to live. These thoughts and other were planted firmly in Amanda's mind.

'_Stupid! I am so stupid! Why do I always mess everything up?!'_

The tree was icy cold and it made her bum and back numb where she touched it. She tried to lean forward so her back was no longer resting against the tree branch. Amanda was not unbearably cold for the temperature it was outside. Her heart was beating fast from all the excitement still. Amanda wasn't sure if it would ever slow down again. She could not erase the image of Esme from her mind.

Amanda thought she heard her voice being called. Someone was looking for her.

_'Oh no...'_

Amanda wasn't sure if she wanted to be found or not. She pressed her face into her knees and hid.

*

*

*

"Amanda!" Elizabeth called out as she ran down the dirty trail toward the willow tree. She could see the tiny figure of the little girl curled up into a tight, a barely visible lump in the center of the tree. Carlisle rushed along beside his assistant, careful not to be too gallant and blow his human charade. He saw Amanda too and was pleased she was in their sights now.

"Amanda," Elizabeth said her name again, this time more softly as she reached the base of the old, willow. She placed her hand on the trunk and cocked her head back to look up at the Amanda, who was silent and hiding her face in her lap.

"Amanda, are you hurt?" Carlisle asked, troubled by the way she was favoring her right arm carefully by holding it to her chest. The joint around Amanda's elbow was swollen, and her wrist as well. This was not visible to a human's eyes at this dark of night, but he could tell that she had injured her arm again and most likely broken a bone.

"Go away!" Amanda said. Her head planted firmly into her jeans muffled the sound of her voice.

"No," Carlisle whispered kindly. "We are not going anywhere without you,"

"Please. Please, come down from there," Elizabeth reasoned with Amanda. She reached out her hand and was just tall enough to touch Amanda's shin with it.

"No!" Amanda strongly rebuffed, not budging.

"It is late. It is time to go home now. Please come down from there," Elizabeth tried again. Carlisle waited patiently, knowing that Amanda was more likely to listen to Elizabeth then himself.

"I have no home!" Amanda's voice cracked. Warm tears soaked into her jeans and she shivered as she realized how cold her skin really was.

"Of course you do....You are coming home with me," Elizabeth told Amanda, her voice steadily assertive. There was no doubt in her tone or in her mind that Amanda was to go anywhere else. Amanda could hear this in Elizabeth's words too and she began to sob, releasing her tense body position.

Elizabeth reached into the tree for the fragile girl to come to, catching Amanda as she slid down the tree branch and into her open arms.

"That's it. Good girl. You are going to be just fine. Everything is going to be okay," Elizabeth cooed soothingly to Amanda, rubbing her back as she cried silently, resting her head on Elizabeth's shoulder. These were the lies Amanda had always wanted someone to tell her. The words made Amanda cry even harder.

"You will need to ice her arm to bring the swelling down," Carlisle told Elizabeth very quietly as they headed back towards the house. Amanda clung tightly with her left arm holding around the back of Elizabeth's neck and her legs around Elizabeth's waist. She had her sore arm bent at a ninety-degree angle and tucked in between herself and Elizabeth.

"Yes, I will. It is late now. I want to take her home. I will bring her to the clinic tomorrow with me if you don't mind,"

"Oh course not," Carlisle agreed, "You take good care or yourself Amanda,"

They were back at the house in no time at all and he helped buckle Amanda into the passenger seat and Elizabeth went around to her door.

"See you tomorrow," Elizabeth said. Carlisle nodded.

"Thank you, Liz," he replied gratefully. He could not have wished for a better home for Amanda to go to. Elizabeth was an amazingly kind, generous, woman. He would have gladly taken Amanda in, but it was safer, and better for everyone that she go home with Elizabeth.

Once the red Firefly had disappeared around the bend, Carlisle made his way towards his home. He could hear his family inside talking as he walked up the driveway. The chandelier was lit in the grand dining room. A family meeting was in session.

*

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*

Rosalie was upset. The news of Amanda and Esme's relationship was not taken well by her at all. She was scared that the Volturi would find out. "We should move! We have only been here for less than a month. It is not a big deal to pack up and take off!" she suggested. Emmet didn't seem to care about the news.

"Aw, come on! I like it here. There is good game to snack on! And this house is one of the best we have ever lived in! Besides, that kid hates Pops anyway. Once she has finished paying her debt to him, we won't see her anymore. Problem solved," Emmet said as if there was no problem at all.

"It had already gone too far. Amanda is a part of our lives if we want her to be or not. She has seen Mom and she is not a fool. Once the shock of tonight wears off and she begins to explore who Mom is, it will not take Amanda long to figure it out on her own," Jasper rationalized.

"I think we should stay," Alice perked up and added her take. "Amanda needs us and I can't predict a happy ending for her yet. There are too many obstacles in the way keeping that child from happiness,"

"We can't stay. If she finds out what we are word gets out…the Volturi will have us all destroyed!" Rosalie raised her voice, interrupting Alice.

"I will look out for any dangers, Rose," Alice suggested. Rosalie heaved a heavy sigh and then Alice continued, "I know you guys don't want to hear this…but she deserves to have Mom in her life. And Mom deserves to get to know Amanda as well!" Alice voiced her opinion.

Carlisle walked in to his home and hoped to hear his wife speak. She had been so silent. As he made his way to the dining room where they were all gathered, he could see her wistful stare as she was thinking about her own little girl.

"I am so sorry, my love," Carlisle whispered into his wife's ear as he wrapped his arms around her and held her in front of him. She reached and held onto his arms and sighed.

"Don't be. There is nothing we can do about the past," she somberly said, "but the future we do have a say in. And I say they we stay in Kipta. At least until I am sure that Amanda is taken care of,"

And with her words, the family meeting was adjourned and the decision was made. The Cullen family would remain in Kitpa for the unforeseeable future.

Esme had accepted Amanda as her granddaughter.

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**Review Please! **


	11. Alice in Wonderland

**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Eleven**

|Alice in Wonderland|

Amanda opened her eyes and looked around. It had been her arm aching that had stirred her from her sleep. She was so tired, but now that she was awake she could not focus on anything but her arm and the wet, sticky feeling of the blankets around her. The bed was damp beneath her where the bag of ice had melted and leaked over all the sheets.

She sat up carefully, pulling her right arm into her and hugging it firmly to make the pain lessen. Amanda looked around the room and recognized the soft blue and white décor and fluffy bedding as Elizabeth's bedroom. It was nice to be back there, she had to admit. When she left the house yesterday morning she thought it would have been her last time in that room.

Seeing as it was light out and she was already awake, Amanda decided to get up. She was warm and clammy from the spilled water anyway so she couldn't go back to bed even if she wanted to. The bag that held the ice last night when Elizabeth had put her to sleep was empty now on the bed beside her.

She kicked off the feather duvet and scooted to the edge of the bed and dropped her feet to the plush carpet. It felt nice and she let the balls of her feet absorb the soft cushioned rug for a moment before standing.

Then she moved to the door and opened it slowly with her left hand. She peeked out in to the hallway and didn't see Elizabeth so Amanda quietly made her way to the kitchen and family room area, hoping to find something to do to take her mind off the pain in her arm. She figured she must have really hurt it this time when she fell.

Amanda sighed and grimaced at her swollen wrist and elbow. _'I bet it is broken this time. It feels broken,'_ she thought to her self. It was a lot worse then it had been the night Bobby had pulled on it so hard. Now it was aching even when she did not move it and little shooting bolts of pain went through her wrist and elbow when she bent it at all. It was the same as the time she had fallen off a skateboard that Tyler had given her.

In the family room, Amanda found Elizabeth curled up on the couch wrapped in a patchwork quilt and sleeping awkwardly because she was too tall for the short piece of furniture. Amanda felt a pang of guilt when she saw this. She had taken Elizabeth's bed for the 3rd night in a row.

Amanda tried to do the math. It was Thursday. She had school today, but had a feeling that Elizabeth would not make her go.

Elizabeth stirred in her sleep and shifted her body to face Amanda who just stood there like a statue, trying not to make a sound. But Elizabeth was already awake, just dozing, so she blinked her eyes open when she thought she noticed Amanda's small figure blocking the light.

"Oh, Amanda!" she exclaimed, opening her eyes wider and sitting up. "You are awake,"

"I couldn't sleep anymore," Amanda mumbled. Elizabeth let the colorful quilt slide off her shoulders as she leaned forward, looking at her wristwatch.

"Well, it is only a little bit after six. We don't have to be at the office until eight," she announced, turning to Amanda and holding out her hand to her. Amanda took this as a signal to step closer to Elizabeth. "How is your arm feeling, Hon?"

"It's kinda sore," Amanda divulged honestly. Elizabeth's brow line frowned with sympathy and nodded, taking a peek at the limb. She didn't like the look of Amanda's puffy forearm. Although, it was a lot less swollen this morning than it had been last night. She knew that Dr Cullen would not be able to put a cast on if it the swelling was still too great. And Elizabeth was fairly sure there was a break this time.

"I'm sure it is. Let's put some more ice on it for now. When we get to the clinic Dr Cullen will give you something to take care of the pain if it is still hurting you,"

"Okay," Amanda whispered somberly. She wasn't going to argue with Elizabeth, even though she knew she absolutely did not want any medicine. She didn't like the idea of any sort of drugs. They frightened her. Elizabeth smiled kindly and got up, taking Amanda by the shoulders and directing her to the kitchen table to take a seat.

*

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*

The Cullen family sat together around the TV as the sun was coming up behind the mountains. The clouds were enough to shield the sunlight from making their skin too translucent. They had to be careful not to go out in the direct sunlight in front of humans because of how their marble, stone skin reacted to the light. It lit up like millions of tiny diamonds when the sunshine hit their smooth, white skin.

Carlisle was getting ready to leave for work. He knew he would have to take care of Amanda's arm this morning before the doors opened and wanted to be there before Elizabeth arrived with Amanda.

"Amanda's arm is fractured...a few inches below her wrist...her radius," Alice revealed as her father put on his jacket and grabbed his car keys from the key rack on the wall. "I meant to tell you earlier. I'm sorry,"

She had known since Amanda fell last night, but had forgotten to mention it. Jasper felt her guilt for not mentioning earlier and rubbed her arms with his hand.

Carlisle nodded, figuring Amanda had done more damage to her arm this time. Esme had filled him in on the hard fall she had taken last night when she tripped over the curbing to get away. Esme was still feeling on edge about her first meeting with Amanda and hoped that she could see her granddaughter again under less dramatic circumstances.

"I am not surprised, Alice. Thank you," Carlisle told his youngest daughter with a smile of gratitude. Alice relaxed and leaned in to Jasper who kissed her neck lovingly.

"Oh, and I was hoping I could have the day off school today…a sick day perhaps?" Alice questioned hopefully, perking her head back up from Jasper's chest. She knew that she needed either Esme or Carlisle to call in for her if she was to take the day off.

"For a good reason, I hope," Carlisle eyed Alice carefully.

"Pfft!" Rosalie huffed.

"If you can call shopping a good reason!" Emmet teased, already informed of Alice's wishes for the day. She had come up with the idea earlier that morning and told her siblings her plan.

"Not for me! For Amanda!" Alice began. She was sincere in her willingness to help the little girl.

"You can go on the weekend. Or after school, Alice," Esme instructed. She wanted her children to fit in at their new school and not miss too many classes. It wasn't that Alice needed the instruction. This was her twelfth time repeating her freshman year. She was polished when it came to her schoolwork.

"I know I could, but Liz will have a lot to deal with today. Phone calls to child services, paperwork, re-organizing her schedule," Alice added. Carlisle was listening intently, considering Alice's request if it would help his assistant who kindly took Amanda into her care.

"Go on," Carlisle urged Alice, who brightened into a smile, knowing he would say yes now!

"Liz will allow it! I will come with you to work today and when you have finished casting Amanda's arm I will take care of her for the day while Liz makes all the arrangements for Amanda to live with her…which…by the way…will go as planned. Social services are going to grant Liz guardianship of Amanda for a trial basis," Alice spoke at top speed in her high, dainty voice. She was excited to be able to help out with Amanda.

"You seem to know what you are doing, Alice, but Amanda has been through an awful ordeal these past few weeks. She will probably not be in the best of spirits. Please don't get yourself carried away," Carlisle spoke with a mild warning. He knew how hyper Alice got when it came to fashion and shopping. However, he was in agreement that Alice could take the day off from her high school studies.

"I won't! I am just going to take Amanda off Liz's hands for a while so she can have some time to herself. Liz still needs to contact her husband and inform him of the news. He will take a bit of encouragement to make him agree to take Amanda. After all, he has yet to meet the girl," Alice included.

"And they are good people, we know that, correct?" Esme asked to make sure. She liked Elizabeth from what she had seen of her, but still wanted reassurance that her newly found granddaughter was going to be in good hands.

"The best. Liz is a gem!" Alice chirped before Carlisle could open his mouth to say pretty much the same thing. He closed his mouth and smiled at his wife.

"I will need a chaperon and driver as well. Please?" Alice clasped her hands together and pleaded for Jasper to be allowed a day off from his classes as well. She was nearly ninety in age, but stuck in her fourteen year old body and mind. She would never be allowed to drive on public roads even though she knew how to run a motorized vehicle better than most adults.

The plea worked. Alice could see that her mother was on her side. Esme probably wanted Jasper to go along as a precaution and as a driver. He was the best of her children when it came to self-control. Esme wanted Amanda to be safe from harm's way at all costs, not that Alice would have ever hurt the child.

Alice smiled and took Jasper's hand excitedly.

"I will call the school for you two, my dear," Esme told Alice. Carlisle kissed Esme on the lips and then bowed his head to the kids and took off to go to work.

"I supposed we still have to go to school, am I correct?" Rosalie questioned her mother with a snotty attitude. Emmet pouted and gave sad eyes to Esme, hoping she would cave and let them all skip a day. School wasn't much fun for any of them.

"Of course," Esme told Rosalie and then glanced to Emmet as well.

"That's really fair!" Rosalie grumbled sarcastically under her breath.

Alice couldn't help but stick her tongue out at her stuck up sister.

"Alice! You put your tongue back in your mouth now or I will change my mind. I don't want any sass from you," Esme added authoritatively. Alice obeyed and sunk down a bit in Jasper's arms.

"Yes, Mom," Alice said and dropped her head. Just a moment later, Alice was smiling again. She was going to get to do what she was best at…shopping!

*

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*

Elizabeth helped strap Amanda's seat belt in place as they got ready to head off to the medical building. Some of the swelling had come down in Amanda's arm now after icing it for a while. Amanda liked the ice on her warm, aching skin. It soothed the pain and took her mind off her injury. She didn't want to go see Dr Cullen, but she knew she had no other option.

Elizabeth had told her so much over breakfast that morning. She had told Amanda that she would have to let Dr Cullen fix her arm, along with a warning that Amanda needed to be polite to the good doctor as he did so. Amanda cringed and agreed to behave herself. She was still unsure of Dr Cullen's kind motives and something about him made her uneasy.

And even more upsetting, and strange, was meeting his wife. Amanda was not sure if she had made up the relation between Mrs Cullen and the woman in her dreams. She had always considered that lady in white to be her mother's angel, but Mrs Cullen was the exact replica of that angel. The two of them looked so much alike and it was as if she had dreamt their meeting last night.

Amanda continued to recall the events at the lake house last night as Elizabeth drove them through town towards Main Street. She thought that there was something odd about Dr Cullen's wife and was curious to learn more about her. After all, it was not every day you get to meet the very vision from your common nightmare.

"Alright!" Elizabeth's voice made Amanda snap out of her deep thoughts. She had just finished parking her Firefly in the parking lot outside of the medical building and reached over to unhook Amanda's seat buckle. Amanda's face was very tense and Elizabeth asked, "Hey….are you okay, Honey?"

"Ya," Amanda answered softly, leaning her head back against the grey fabric of the passenger car seat. She gazed off again and sighed. Elizabeth organized her purse and then got out of the vehicle, moving around to the passenger side door to open it for Amanda.

"Cheer up, Sweetie. It won't be all that bad. I am sure Dr Cullen will be very gentle not to hurt you," she told Amanda, thinking that the reason for Amanda's sulk was because of her arm. Amanda sighed again and got out of the car slowly. Elizabeth put on a smile and walked beside Amanda all the way inside into the lobby.

The clinic would not open for more than an hour, but Elizabeth and Carlisle had agreed to meet early to slip Amanda in before they started the workday. Elizabeth helped Amanda unzip the sweater she was wearing. It was one of Elizabeth's retro hoodies from when she was in high school that she had never gotten rid of. It was tie-dyed and had studs on the pockets and was hanging off of Amanda awkwardly with the sleeved rolled up.

"You remember what we talked about, don't you?" Elizabeth reminded Amanda, bending down on one knee to be eye level with the small girl, "About being polite and cooperating with Dr Cullen?"

"Yes!" Amanda heaved impatiently without looking directly into Elizabeth's loving face. She instead caught Dr Cullen's warm and caring face grinning down at her as he entered the lobby.

"Good girl," Elizabeth said positively and turned her head to grin at Carlisle as he walked up in a gallant stride.

"Good morning ladies," he greeted, "Amanda, how are you feeling?"

"My arm is broken," she answered back stiffly. _'How do you think I feel?'_ she thought to say rudely, but bit her tongue because Elizabeth was giving her a somewhat stern look of warning.

"You are most likely correct about that, Amanda. We need to get an x-ray to be certain, though," Carlisle chuckled, knowing Amanda was right about the break. Alice was never wrong about these sorts of things.

"Hey Mandi!" Alice sang as she skipped up from behind Dr Cullen. Amanda was surprised to see the pretty, dark haired teen.

"Hi," Amanda replied meekly. Alice was dressed in a soft beige Burberry cardigan with black leggings and patented leather shoes with bows on the heels. Amanda was mesmerized. Elizabeth couldn't help but notice the stunning ensemble and the Chanel clutch to match as well and take a step back.**  
**

Alice noticed Amanda's retro sweater and would have vomited if she were human. It was not in style now and never should have been a fad back in the 1990's. The tie-dyed look and studs was too much for Alice to bear. She was so happy she would be taking care of Amanda's wardrobe needs today.

"Alice is ahead in her studies. I thought she could spend some time with Amanda this afternoon. You must have a lot of things to do today," Carlisle explained his daughter's presence to his assistant. Elizabeth shut her gaping mouth and stopped staring at Alice's attire with envy and smiled at him.

"That is very thoughtful of you. Are you sure you can stand to miss school, Alice?" Elizabeth asked.

"Oh, yes. I can catch up in no time at all!" Alice reassured.

"I don't need a babysitter," Amanda grumbled softly. Alice simply beamed a huge smile and skipped over to her happily.

"As soon as your arm is fixed up I want to take you shopping! Won't that be fun?" the petite elfin vampire exclaimed with bright enthusiasm. Amanda wasn't sure and looked to Elizabeth in confusion.

"I think that would be very nice of you Alice. Amanda does need some new things. I will give you my credit card to take along," Elizabeth offered. She trusted Dr Cullen completely and knew she could trust Alice.

"Oh, alright!" Alice chirped. She flashed a cheeky grin to her father and Elizabeth. Carlisle subtly raised his eyebrow at his daughter, warning her not to go overboard. Alice already knew that she couldn't spend exorbitant amounts on Elizabeth's credit card. She would use her own if she needed, but she didn't tell Elizabeth that.

"First thing's first," Carlisle interceded, "Come along, Amanda. Let's get your arm taken care of and then you can go have some fun with Alice,"

"Yes, let's!" Alice agreed and bounced up and down and took Amanda's left hand and carefully pulled her towards the hallway. Elizabeth smoothed out Amanda's long hair affectionately as she went by.

"Thank you," Elizabeth mouthed to Carlisle as he trailed on after Alice and Amanda. He smiled and went to the small room that held the radiology equipment. Elizabeth went to work right away on making her arrangements for Amanda to stay with her.

*

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*

It took almost an hour to get through with calling Social Services and informing them about Amanda. They were not local so they said they would send a representative out in a few days to meet with her and Amanda and to help fill out the required documents to apply for legal guardianship.

It sounded like it would not be too hard to gain custody of Amanda. If she had no living relatives or guardians willing to take her in, then Elizabeth would have no trouble being granted her wish to keep the girl. It would take months to complete the process and a few visits from Child Protective Services, though.

The only hurdle to go over by the end of a long hour was to call her husband, who was not answering her calls. She tried again and by some miracle Cole picked up on the other line.

"Baby!" he shouted, happy to talk to his wife. They usually talked once or twice a day, but he had been traveling between Provinces non-stop for the last several days and was not able to get reception in a few areas.

"Cole! Oh, I am so glad I got you!" Elizabeth said with relief, "I have something very urgent and important to discuss with you,"

"Sure, Babe. What is it?" he asked pleasantly. Elizabeth decided not to beat around the bush. She had told him about Amanda weeks ago and they had briefly chatted about Donna Combs and how she was not a suitable caregiver. Cole knew Amy Peppel from high school as well, so he was up to date with Amanda's situation as well as any other resident in Kipta who listened to town gossip.

"I hope you will not be upset with me," she began.

"Uh…okay," Cole said, a bit hesitant now and losing his cheer.

"Well, you remember me telling you about Amanda Peppel, right?"

"Ya…the kid who drove our car through a building. How could I forget?" He half teased. Elizabeth didn't laugh.

"Well, this is abrupt and impulsive perhaps, but she needs a home and I have offered to take her into custody,"

There was silence on the other end of the line. Cole was taking a morning break from a business meeting and this was not the sort of news he had been expecting as he sipped on his coffee and ate his chocolate donut.

"Um…so…what are you saying exactly?" he finally asked.

"I know you are being blind sided by this. I am so sorry, Darling. This is the kind of thing that we should be discussing together and deciding on, but there is no time. Amanda needed a place to stay and I acted quickly. She needed me," Elizabeth rambled, "She has no one. I did what I thought was best for her,"

"Where is she now?" he questioned, not fully comprehending the situation. He put his coffee down and listened intently to his wife.

"Oh!" Elizabeth heaved a loud sigh, "She broke her arm. Dr Cullen is just putting a cast on now,"

"What happened?" Cole inquired. He was still not sure how this had all come about. Last he heard Amanda was under Donna Comb's care.

"It is a long story, but I told you about Donna Comb's being beaten the night of the storm…"

"Yes…" Cole muttered when Elizabeth stopped to take a breath.

"Well, when she was released from the clinic she packed up her things and left town leaving Amanda behind,"

"My God," Cole gasped. Elizabeth nodded exasperatingly, though he could not see her expression.

"Amanda came home to an empty house and then ran away. She fell and hurt her arm somehow. When we found her I took her home with me. She has nowhere else to go, Cole. No one else to look after her," Elizabeth begged for her husband's understanding.

Cole could not imagine how someone could do that to a child. He sighed and pushed his donut away, not able to think about eating at the moment. His stomach was in knots. He loved his wife and knew she would not do anything to intentionally go against his wishes. Cole decided that Elizabeth must have a good reason to be willing to take Amanda.

"You did what you thought was best for her. I can appreciate that," he said somberly.

"I am so sorry I didn't ask permission. I tried calling you, but your cell phone was out of range," Elizabeth apologized.

"Don't be sorry, Babe. We will figure this out. I trust you to know what you are doing. If your mind is made up and you are sure about doing this then I will support your decision," Cole told her.

"Oh, Cole. Thank you. I love you so much, Baby!" Elizabeth cried out, a tear fell from her eye. She was so relieved he was not upset with her for not consulting him about this first.

"I love you too, Liz. You know I would do anything for you," he proclaimed, "And if this is what you want. Than I am behind you one hundred percent of the way!"

"You are wonderful. I don't deserve you," she sighed and wiped away the tears from beneath her eyes with her phone-free hand.

"I think you have that backwards. I don't know how I ever got so lucky to marry you, Liz. You are the most loving, generous woman,"

"I love you," Elizabeth repeated. She missed Cole so much. Even more so now that he was being such a good sport about her bring Amanda into their lives without consulting him first.

"I love you. I do have to go, however. The meeting is about to commence again," Cole announced, feeling a bit shaken.

"Okay. I will call you later tonight then," Elizabeth told him.

"I will be waiting. Have a good day, Babe," he said goodbye.

"You too," she whispered and then there was a click on the other end of the line as Cole hung up. Elizabeth put the phone back on its cradle and then noticed that it was time to open the blinds and start the workday.

As soon as she unlocked the doors a few people hurried in to be the first patients of the day. Elizabeth signed them in and had them take a seat. She could hear Dr Cullen finishing up with Amanda and so she told the woman that the wait would not be too much longer.

*

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*

Amanda had been mostly silent for the whole ordeal. She turned down the medication Dr Cullen offered to her if she felt like her arm was hurting too much. Amanda did not like taking pills. They frightened her terribly since the night her mother had killed herself with an overdose.

Her arm was not feeling too badly anymore since Elizabeth had iced it to bring down the swelling that morning. The little bit of aching was tolerable and Dr Cullen was very gentle with her, like Elizabeth has said. Dr Cullen told Amanda that it was a good thing her arm was less swollen now because otherwise he could not cast it. He also told her how lucky she was to have only fractured her radius and not both the bones in her forearm. The bone set itself and only needed time to heal. Amanda was not too impressed with having a cast, so the news was not something she neither needed nor wanted to know.

Alice was perky the whole time her father was looking after Amanda's injury. She rattled on to Amanda about different things. Mostly, about the fun they were going to have together and about how they were going to be such great friends.

Alice's optimism was slightly starling to Amanda, but it was working to take her mind of her problems and for that she was grateful. Alice also made her feel a little bit better about the cast Dr Cullen was applying. The pixie girl was so enthralled with the idea of decorating the cast. Amanda even let Alice pick the fiberglass colored material used to wrap the arm.

When she was all done, Amanda walked out of the exam room with a hot pink and purple striped cast. Alice had insisted that her father make it 'pretty' and he tried his best. Amanda was not so sure about it, but she liked Alice enough to go along with what she said.

Amanda looked down at her arm thoughtfully. It was so bright in neon pink and purple. She thought it looked like the Cheshire cat from 'Alice in Wonderland'. She tried to decide if maybe this Alice had known that and had chosen those colors on purpose. Alice was just kooky enough to do something like that, Amanda thought. She shook away the idea as Dr Cullen finished strapping her arm into a sling. This time a smaller, black one.

"You are lucky, my dear. You should be able to take off the sling in a week if the ligaments in your elbow are allowed to rest. I put you in a short cast for that reason. I want you to promise me that you will not remove this without Elizabeth's or my permission," Carlisle said when they had reached the front desk and Elizabeth was in earshot.

"I guess," Amanda muttered, unwillingly. Elizabeth stopped her work to look over at the three of them.

"I need your word," Dr Cullen pressed, he waited patiently. Alice nudged Amanda to give her a push of motivation. Alice was in a hurry to get going.

"Fine! I promise!" Amanda gave in. Just then, Jasper walked in the doors and in a very gentlemanly demeanor, bowed his head to the patients in the waiting area and then to Elizabeth.

"This is my son, Jasper," Carlisle introduced the handsome, teenage looking boy to his assistant. He was the only Cullen that Elizabeth had not met yet. She was taken back again by his stunning appearance. "Jasper, I'd like you to meet, Elizabeth Roth,"

"It is a pleasure to meet your acquaintance, Mrs Roth," Jasper charmingly spoke and her reached out for Elizabeth's hand. She took it and felt herself suddenly at ease in spite of his out-of-this-world charisma and good looks. He kissed the top of her hand lightly. She thought for a moment how much Jasper reminded her of Carlisle. He had the same golden blonde hair, only with more movement set into it. She blushed, not used to the gesture.

"It is lovely to meet you, as well," she replied, composing herself. Jasper smirked and let go of her hand. Alice beamed proudly at him.

"I will be Alice and Amanda's driver. I wanted to come and offer you my assurance that I will take good care of them today. Alice would like to go into Prince George for some shopping, I understand," Jasper told Elizabeth eloquently. She found it hard to say no to his request. She nodded.

"That is fine with me. Your father has told me nothing but wonderful things about you," she said. Jasper looked to Carlisle and they exchanged a quick nod. Elizabeth reached out for Amanda to come closer to her. Amanda obliged.

"Have a good day, Amanda. I want you to stay close to Jasper and Alice at all times and be on your best behavior. Do you understand?" Elizabeth demanded of Amanda lovingly, but with a serious tone that Amanda knew she should obey.

"Okay," Amanda agreed.

"Great! Now, let's go shopping!" Alice cheered, taking Amanda by the hand again and leading her to the door. Jasper bowed his head at Elizabeth politely and then again at the ladies in the lobby as he followed Alice out the door and to the car.

*

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*

Amanda was lost in this weird new world with Alice. She felt like she had left Earth because she had never been around someone so happy and so ecstatic about everything. Especially shopping!

Alice was the most interesting person Amanda had ever met. She was bright and energetic and was being so nice to her. Amanda could not understand why Alice was being so friendly. It went against the grain since Amanda had not shown her any kindness in return.

The drive down to Prince George was a good one hundred and fifty kilometers away. It should have taken about two hours to get there, give or take a few minutes depending on traffic. However, Amanda noticed how quickly and efficiently Jasper drove his green Chevrolet Camero. She never felt unsafe with him, though. It was a peculiar thing, Amanda noticed.

They made it to the big mall in Prince George in just one hour and began their shopping. Alice needed no help finding all the right stores. Amanda knew nothing about how to pick out clothing. She let Alice guide her and helplessly wandered along beside. Sometimes Alice would latch onto her and pull her by her left hand when she walked too slowly.

Every once and a while Amanda would start to feel overwhelmed by the attention that Alice was giving her, but it melted away so easily whenever Jasper was there with them. He wanted Amanda to have a pleasant experience and so he stayed close by her and Alice in case her anxiety was too much. Amanda didn't understand the he was manipulating her feelings, but she eyed him curiously whenever he would come near her.

After a few hours of shopping, Alice remembered that humans needed to eat so she dragged Amanda to the food court in the mall and let her choose what she wanted. Amanda was not accustomed to having options so she simply shrugged and let Alice choose for her. So Alice dragged Amanda to a familiar looking restaurant food chain.

"One happy meal, please!" Alice announced to the cashier at the McDonald's counter. She was having a great time playing human today. It was more fun to do when she had an actual human there with her. Alice found Amanda fascinating and longed to get to be close with the human child. Alice could not remember her own childhood, so she liked the idea of living vicariously through Amanda.

"What do you want in your happy meal?" the pimple faced boy behind the counter inquired, bored by the repetitiveness of his job. Alice scrunched up her face in thought and then turned to Amanda for an answer.

"I don't know," Amanda mumbled, feeling shy. She had only had McDonald's food once before when she was younger and it was some other kids' birthday party. Alice turned back to the cashier.

"What are the options?" Alice asked. The boy looked disgruntled to have to go through them, but when he looked at Alice, and really looked at her for the first time, he was blown away with her pretty, pixie face and big hazel eyes. She batted her eyelashes at him.

"Shameless," Jasper uttered under his breathe so low no human could have picked it up. Alice's mouth went up in a playful grin. After all, if he could make Elizabeth swoon in his presence, she could surely play with this young boys affections. She giggles lightly.

"Uh…hamburger, cheeseburger, or chicken nuggets?" the boy asked Amanda with a phony smile, trying to impress Alice now by being kind to the little girl with a cast.

"Cheeseburger," Amanda decided. It sounded better than whatever a 'nugget' was.

"French fries or apple slices?" he asked her this time. Amanda made a face. _'What kind of question is that? What kid would ever pick apple slices?_' she wondered.

"French fries!" she answered like it was obvious. He smirked. Jasper chuckled and shifted his weight around and moved the bags in his hands to seem more human. In truth, the heavy packages were a light as feather to him.

"And to drink you have the option of apple juice, orange juice, chocolate milk, two percent milk, or pop,"

"Mmmm…" Amanda hummed as she thought about what she'd like to drink. She was not used to having an option. "Chocolate milk," she decided.

Alice nudged her lightly.

"Please," Amanda added, "...and thank you,"

"Will that be all for you?" the young guy asked, he pulled his yellow and red visor down a bit. Alice held back the urge to cringe. It went against the laws of fashion to wear anything that hideous, she felt.

"Yes, that's all. Thank you," she answered and paid for the meal. Amanda's stomach gurgled in anticipation. And she didn't have to wait long. They don't call it 'Fast Food' without reason. It was ready in minutes and Alice took her to a table and sat her down.

Amanda was too hungry and too excited to eat her fries she dug in and began eating. It wasn't until she was half way down she noticed that she was the only one with food. She took a gulp of her chocolate milk to wash down a bite of cheeseburger.

"Aren't you guys gonna eat?" she asked, looking from Alice to Jasper.

"We had a huge breakfast this morning," Alice lied. She smiled brilliantly at Amanda. It usually worked on humans to flash them a smile and they would instinctively succumb to their desire. Amanda still found Alice's answer odd. Jasper sensed this feeling of apprehension and suddenly Amanda had the sudden surge of joy go through her. She giggled.

"What is so funny?" Alice asked, playfully.

"I don't…know," Amanda responded. She forgot what she had been thinking about and went back to eating her meal again. She pulled a the small toy from her happy meal carton and frown. _'What is this?' _she wondered and she set it down. Alice picked up the brightly colored toy and had the same thought. She shrugged and tossed it into one of Amanda's shopping bags.

After lunch, and convincing Alice she was too tired to go into another store, Amanda stopped the shopping spree. It was overload, anyway. Alice had bought her several pairs of new shoes and winter coats, as well as, jeans, skirts, shirts, sweaters, pajamas and a whole bunch of under garments. Also, much to Amanda's chagrin, Alice bought her some leggings and dresses. She swore she would never wear them, but Alice insisted.

Amanda was worn out and not sure how to thank Alice for everything. It all seemed like a dream to her. Too good to be true! A part of Amanda was excited and thrilled with her new clothing. She found it hard to express this to Jasper and Alice when they asked her is she was pleased, but Jasper knew. And therefore, so did Alice.

*

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*

Amanda was settled and comfortable in the back leather seat of the green Camero again as they drove back home to Kitpa. She was thinking about the woman in white again and decided to bring it up. Alice saw the question coming and braced herself.

"Hey, Alice?" Amanda started. She traced her finger along the purple lines of her cast. She liked the purple color much better then the pink. Alice turned her head around from the front passenger seat and gazed at Amanda.

"Mmmhmm?"

"I heard your dad and Elizabeth talking once and they said you were adopted," Amanda continued. She didn't raise her head to meet Alice's gaze.

"That's right," Alice answered, "We all were. Me, Jasper, Rosalie and Emmet,"

"How come your mom didn't just have her own kids?" Amanda asked. She was fishing for information on the woman in white. She had to know more about her. It had been on her mind all day and this was the time to look into it, even if she was being rude and intrusive by asking these sorts of questions.

"She can't have children of her own, Amanda," Jasper explained with a sad tone. He knew how Esme and even Rosalie felt about the fact that they were unable to bear child in their vampire bodies. Alice could never remember being human and wanting children so she was not so devastated but this fact.

"Oh," Amanda said sheepishly in a low voice, her mouth making a perfectly round 'O' shape.

"She is a wonderful mother. I could not imagine a better one," Alice chirped. She was onside with the plan to stay in Kipta and have Esme look over Amanda's well being. Alice knew that Amanda deserved to get to know her grandmother who would one day love her so much.

"Is she from here?" Amanda inquired.

"She was born and raised in Idaho," Alice offered. It did the trick. Amanda was not stupid. She perked up, knowing that her mother had been born in Idaho too.

"That is where my mom was born too!" she blurted out. She regretted her outburst almost immediately. She shut her mouth and sank into the seat more.

"Why do you want to know about our mother, Amanda?" Alice asked. Jasper shot her a warning glance, his eyes large with intent to stop Alice from taking this too far.

"No good reason," Amanda mumbled, "She just looks like someone I thought I knew,"

"I don't think you could have met her before. She has never been to Kipta prior to our move," Jasper said. He wanted this discussion to end. He could sense Amanda's curiosity and it made him uneasy.

"I know!" Alice suddenly cheered, clapping her hands together, "How about you come over to our house on Saturday? We have tons of video games and board games and a huge TV. Won't that be fun?"

"I don't know. I usually hang out with my friend, Tyler, on the weekends," Amanda said; glad to have come up with an excuse to turn Alice down with so quickly. However, Alice was one step ahead of her, determined to get Amanda over to their house to spend more time around Esme.

"You should bring Tyler. I bet he likes cars! My older brother has a monster of a Jeep!" Alice enthused. It was already a done deal now. Alice could see it! She knew for a fact that Tyler would be coming over with Amanda this Saturday now that Emmet's jeep was involved. Jasper shook his head a bit disapprovingly, but didn't stop her. Once Alice was on a roll, she could not be slowed down.

"He likes cars, ya," Amanda admitted cautiously.

"Well then! Bring Tyler with you. You've met Rosalie and Emmet…they have a bunch of cars…and one really big Jeep I KNOW Tyler will just love," Alice sang. Amanda squinted her eyes a bit. She was beginning to notice how Alice seemed to always get her way.

She hadn't even agreed, but Amanda was going to the Cullen's lake house this weekend for a play date with Dr Cullen's strangely unique kids.

* * *

**Review please.... **_(have you yet? Even if there is more to read, I like to hear from you along the way!)_**  
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	12. Amanda in Cullenland

**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Twelve**

|Amanda in Cullenland|

"Does it hurt?" Tyler asked Amanda, as he drew a small truck with big tires on the hardened fiberglass casing that covered her wrist and forearm. He pursed his lips and thought about how ridiculous the neon pink and purple stripes looked. Amanda shook her head, no.

"My elbow does a bit. It is just a sprain, so it should be better soon though," she explained, eyeing the sling with contempt. She had been ordered to keep it on at all times, but she had slipped her arm out carefully now to show Tyler her cast and let him draw on it. She didn't care for cars, but they were all that Tyler knew how to draw.

"It is kinda…bright…looking. Don't you think?" he asked, trying not to cringe as he said the words.

"Yee-ah…Alice picked it out," Amanda admitted sheepishly, "She is so weird," Then she felt a touch guilty for saying that. Alice had been so nice to her. It didn't change the fact that Alice was not like other teen girls. Amanda let her guilt slip away and watched her best friend as he carefully etched in the black wheels of the monster truck.

"Do we really have to go over there?" he asked as he signed his name in block letters under his drawing. Then he shoved the black permanent marker back into his pant pocket. They were both sitting on the front steps of Elizabeth's home. Tyler made sure not to mention Donna Combs because it was still a sore spot for Amanda to think about being left behind…even if it was by that wretched woman.

"Ya. I told Alice and Jasper we would. Alice really wants us to," Amanda said. She pretended to be disappointed about going to the Cullen's lake house as well, but inside she was intensely curious to get another peek at Mrs Cullen if she could.

"I thought we were going to get back to work on the tree fort. It is not raining today," Tyler pointed out. Amanda held up her heavy arm with the cast sarcastically and then winced as her elbow protested. "Oh, ya," Tyler mumbled. Amanda hugged her arm into her and thought.

"Alice said you'd like it there, Ty! Her brother has a big truck!" she told him, trying to convince him to go with her. She didn't want to have to go alone. Just then the door opened and Elizabeth poked her head out.

"Hello Tyler," she greeted the small, blonde boy. He smiled and pushed his glasses back up his nose.

"Hi," he replied.

"Amanda!" Elizabeth gasped, her friendly smile fading. Amanda sat up straight and looked around. '_What did I do?'_ she wondered. "You get your arm back in that sling right away. You know the rules," Elizabeth shook her head with disappointment.

"But Tyler was drawing on it!" Amanda explained shrilly as she struggled to get her arm back into the sling that hung around her neck.

"I don't want to hear any excuses, young lady. You need to follow Dr Cullen's orders if you want your arm to heal properly," Elizabeth explained in a softer tone. She paused for a moment, smiled, and then continued. "Now…did you want me to drive you two over to Alice's or have you decided to walk?"

Amanda looked to Tyler for his say. She would prefer to walk, but she knew that Tyler didn't like trying to keep up with her fast pace. He didn't have his inhaler with him today it seemed like. He usually had it in his pocket, but he had emptied his pockets earlier to get the marker out and Amanda didn't see it.

"I don't want to walk all that way….in case it rains," he said. The sky was clouded over, but it didn't look like it was about to rain. He didn't want to seem like a wimp. Amanda nodded and turned to look at Elizabeth.

"I would be happy to give you two a ride," she told them, "First, go wash up and have something to eat. I made ham and cheese sandwiches for lunch,"

"Yum!" Tyler cheered and stood up. Amanda's lips curled mildly into a brief grin. Elizabeth was like a real mom, although she didn't think of Elizabeth as her mother in any way. Amanda just liked that she could have Tyler over to Elizabeth's house and she'd make them food like his mom always did. Donna had never once done that and Tyler rarely came over to that house.

"Hurry up, Sweetheart. You told Alice you'd be at her place by Noon. You don't want to keep her waiting, do you?"

Amanda shrugged after she got herself standing again. Elizabeth closed her eyes and sighed, ushering Amanda inside after Tyler. Amanda was quite the stubborn child. She knew she was going to be a handful. Elizabeth didn't mind. She believed that every child should know unconditional love. And she intended to show this to Amanda.

*

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Alice bounced around the house, getting it ready for Tyler and Amanda's visit. Rosalie was livid that Alice would invite the 'human kiddies', as Emmet liked to call them, over without asking the rest of them permission first. Alice expected no trouble to occur this afternoon. In fact, she thought it would be good for Amanda to come over. Alice knew that today was the day Amanda would get to really meet Esme.

"Do you think you bought enough candy?" Rosalie snidely asked viewing the display of cookies and candy that Alice had laid out on the coffee table.

"Oh my goodness! You think I should go get more?" Alice questioned, worried that she didn't have enough…or the right kinds, "How much do human children eat?"

"She's just joking, Love. This is more than enough," Jasper soothed Alice. Rosalie smirked and poked at a chocolate chip cookie on a plate with disgust. She pushed the plate away from her and she sat down on the sofa.

"I can't believe I used to love this stuff. It smells foul," she stated clearly.

"I wish I could remember what this all tasted like," Alice contemplated for a second or two.

"I am pretty sure they don't serve jelly beans and licorice in insane asylums, Alice!" Emmet joked. Rosalie shot him a menacing glare and soft warning growl rumbled in Jasper's chest. "What?" Emmet gave an innocent shrug.

"It's fine. I don't even remember that, guys," Alice shrugged off the comment. She only knew about her mental health days from doing research into her past. She didn't actually remember a single moment of her time in the asylum or the year prior. She clapped her hands and continued to set up the food table for their guests, soon to be arriving. "So what do you think?"

"I dunno, Alice. It feels a little bit like 'Hansel and Gretel,' to me. Don't you think?" Emmet asked jokingly, "They are sure to make for better eatin' if we fatten them up first…is that your theory?!"

"Emmet!" Alice scolded him, not able to drop the smile from her impish face. She placed a bag of red licorice down on the glass coffee table in front of the fireplace. The TV was behind a white screen and covered up to look like part of the mantel. Alice had put out a pile of Disney DVDs that she thought Amanda and Tyler might like if they wanted to watch a movie.

"Just sayin'," he mumbled and Jasper bumped into him playful. Emmet wrapped his arm around Jasper's neck in a lock and the two of them began to fight it out in fun. Alice saw this ending badly and warned them.

"You'd better quit that now. Mom will be furious if you break her artisan vase and it will happen if you continue, so stop now!" Alice spoke urgently as the boys rough-housed. They obeyed and released each other reluctantly. Alice was very rarely wrong about these sorts of things.

"Outside?" Emmet inquired, giving a sideways glance to Jasper who grinned mischievously at the suggestion. In a flash they were both gone. Rosalie rolled her eyes and took a deep, unnecessary breath in.

"Give me strength," she murmured.

"Boys will be boys," Alice sang.

*

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*

The drive to the Cullen's house took about fifteen minutes because the road was a bit out of the way compared to the trails that cut by the lake a lot more tightly. Amanda and Tyler sat in the back seat of Elizabeth's old Firefly and stared out the window. Tyler nudged Amanda with his foot lightly.

Amanda tore herself away from the view and nudged him back a bit harder. He grinned and then kicked her again. Amanda opened her mouth in mild pain and shock, but it turned to a grin quickly and she then shifted herself to better kick him. He moved his legs. They giggled as the continued their kicking war in the backseat.

"Alight, you two. Smarten up. We're here," Elizabeth informed them. Alice was waiting anxiously on the front porch, bouncing up and down with excitement. Elizabeth parked out front on the driveway and turned around to the kids in the back seat. Amanda and Tyler were trying to keep a straight face as their feet kept kicking out toward one another.

"Behave yourselves today. You are guests so be on your best behavior," Elizabeth cautioned them.

"Yep!" Tyler agreed. He was used to this sort of speech from his own mother. Amanda didn't say a word. She just opened her side door and kicked Tyler one more time before quickly jumping out.

"Gotcha last!" she called out. Tyler's mouth gaped in frustration and then scurried to get out of the vehicle on his own side. He ran out to Amanda and she stopped him, one hand in the air. "Nuh-uh…we are guests. Behave yourself," she teased him. He squinted his eyes at her and folded his arms against his chest. Amanda usually won their 'gotcha last' wars.

"Hi Mandi! Hi Ty!" Alice greeted them as she ran up to them at human pace, maybe a bit faster. Amanda noticed, but didn't think too much into it. Tyler was a bit surprised by Alice's perkiness and harsh, but beautiful appearance. This was the first time he had met one of the Cullens. Amanda's description of her had not done her justice.

Elizabeth rolled down her window and Alice perked her head up and said, "Hey Liz! Don't worry about picking them up. One of us will bring them home before supper hour,"

Elizabeth closed her mouth_. 'How'd she know I was going to offer to come back to pick them up before dinnertime?'_ she thought. She smiled at Alice. "Thank you, Alice. Be sure to tell your father, 'thanks again,' for me. I really appreciate him letting me have Saturdays off,"

"I will do that!" Alice chirped. Elizabeth smiled and with a quick nod she started the car again and turned around to leave. She was thrilled to have the whole afternoon to herself to get her household chores completed. The guest room was almost completely renovated into a room for Amanda, but she still needed to put together the bed today. Carlisle worked on Saturdays but now that Elizabeth had Amanda full time he told her he could manage for one day without her help.

As Elizabeth drove away Alice took Amanda's left hand in her right and Tyler's right hand in her left. Tyler gasped at the coldness, but Amanda already knew Alice's hand would be cold. She was used to the feeling of cold hands and come to accept it from the Cullen family.

"Come on! Let's go inside. We can play a game!" Alice announced. Tyler thought Amanda's pace was fast…Alice's was even faster. He jogged along beside her too stunned to say anything. Amanda was more attune to Alice's strange personality from spending a day with her at the mall the other day. This excitement was nothing compared to Alice hyped up on a shopping trip!

Once inside, Tyler took off his shoes to be polite and Amanda followed his lead. Alice waited patiently for the human children, but she bounced up and down on the balls of her feet as she did so.

"I hope you are hungry. I went to the store and bought some food I thought you two might like," Alice explained as they followed her down a hallway and took a left into the living room. Amanda recognized it as the one she had been in the day she nearly drowned. She shivered at the memory.

"Whoa!" Tyler proclaimed as he set his sights on the table covered in junk food. Amanda's eyes grew wide and she stopped in her tracks at the sight. Never before had she seen such a display. There were cookie on a plate, a bag of red vines, a dish of chocolate covered raisins, a dish of jellybeans, a dish of candy corn, and bag of cotton candy, a heaping bowl of potato chips, and a cup with dozens of pixie sticks and tootsie pops in it.

"You like?" Alice asked, her hands clasped together and an intense grin on her face. Amanda flinched away from her and nodded. Tyler didn't notice anything but the candy.

"So cool!" he excited. Amanda bumped him. "What?" he asked her innocently, not seeing what was wrong with his good cheer.

"Your not supposed to have sugar," Amanda reminded him. She had never seen even a morsel of junk food at Tyler's house. His parents were strict about healthy eating. Maybe too strict, but still…they would surly disapprove of this.

Alice's face looked so sad suddenly that Amanda felt bad. She walked over to the table and picked up a pixie stick. She had always wanted to try one but had never gotten around to it. Alice perked up as she did this. Tyler beamed and picked up a few chocolate covered raisins. In his mind they were healthy even if they were covered in chocolate.

"What game are we going to play?" Emmet inquired loudly as he came bounding into the room. Tyler dropped a raisin and stumbled back. Emmet took this as a warning to tone himself down. Amanda didn't flinch. She remembered the big one! She was enjoying sucking on the open end of her pixie stick too much. It was sweet and sour at the same time and she liked it!

"Tyler…this is my big brother, Emmet," Alice introduced, "He is not a scary as his seems, I promise,"

"Just as dumb as I look, though," Emmet joked back, insulting himself. Amanda cracked a sincere grin. Tyler raised his hand slowly and mechanically waved from side to side with an awkward, half smile.

"It's true, Tyler. You should have no trouble beating him at 'Monster Jam'," Alice announced with inside knowledge. Tyler's fear was instantly covered up by intrigue. He knew this game well. He had it on his Play Station. Jasper strode into the room and bowed his head, his hands behind him.

"Did I hear you say, 'Monster Jam'?" Jasper asked, in on the ruse. Alice nodded expressively.

"Tyler this is Jasper," she introduced. She left out the part about him being her husband. The town was under the impression that they were all adopted, but that made them brother and sister in the eyes of others. It was too hard to explain, let alone to two young kids who didn't even know what incest was.

"Hi," Tyler answered. He was suddenly not so shy anymore. Jasper winked at Alice. She giggled.

"Do you want to play 'Monster Jam', Tyler?" Jasper offered. Tyler nodded eagerly. His mother only let him play a few hours of his game system per week. He had already used up his time at home.

"I'm the blue controller!" Emmet chanted and made his way to the console that was neatly tucked in on a shelf beside the fireplace. Jasper hit the switch and the screen slid down, revealing the massive, sixty-inch plasma flat screen that hung over the mantel.

"Cool!" Tyler said and walked up behind Emmet and took the red controller from him. The all three boys took a seat on the sofa facing the TV, Tyler in the middle, and they started their game. Amanda tried watching, but it bored her.

"Girls will be girls," Alice sang in her ear. Amanda pulled the empty pixie stick out of her mouth and stared back at Alice in disbelief.

_'Who talks like that?'_ she wondered, _'Old people. Old please say weird things like that,'_

Then Alice took Amanda by the hand again and tugged on her arm gently. Amanda gave in and went with Alice. The tiny, black haired vampire had a plan. She knew that Amanda would run in to Esme today if she was given the chance to stray. So she decided to get the girl away from her friend and on a tour of the house.

*

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*

"And this….is my wardrobe!" Alice proudly sang as she swung the doors out of her huge walk in closet.

Amanda had been on a tour of the whole house practically. None of the tour particularly interested her. Carlisle's office was like a cross between a museum and a library so she had found it the most amusing. Alice's huge closet held no special interest to her, though. Alice saw her wide-eyed, expression and pouted lightly.

"It's cool…" Amanda said in a low, unenthusiastic tone. Alice huffed a bit and shook her head. She noticed that Amanda was wearing one of the new shirts that they had picked up a few days ago, but was still wearing her old pair of ripped up jeans.

"You know, Amanda. The hole-in-the-knee fad is not really in style anymore," Alice explained. "It may seem that way because you can actually buy brand new jeans with holes already cut into them, but that is just ridiculous. Why would anyone with a sane mind buy holey pants? It is disgraceful!"

Amanda's lips stuck out and her brow furrowed. She liked to pretend she didn't care about fashions or how she looked, but the truth was she longed to dress like Stacy or her minion friends, Emily and Ashley. They always had the nicest outfits.

"What's your point?" Amanda questioned harshly, taking offense.

"So…you have a new wardrobe now. Use it!" Alice didn't harp on Amanda's attitude. "If you want I can come over and help you get dressed in the mornings. If you are not sure what clothing items go together,"

"I don't need you to dress me!" Amanda sulked.

"Very well, but you are such a pretty little thing, you should try to dress up to enhance yourself,"

"Whatever," Amanda said dully. She knew Alice was right, but was too stubborn to admit that she had tried to dress in one of the skirts Alice had bought her at the mall the other day, but when she saw herself in it she took it off. She was not used to having such nice things. They overwhelmed her and she feared being laughed at.

Alice knew that Esme was home; in the only room she had not shown to Amanda. Alice could see very clearly that if left alone, Amanda's curiosity would lead her right to Esme. So, without wasting time, Alice hopped back from her closet doors and headed to the door.

"Please excuse me, Amanda. Nature calls!" Alice sang, almost too happy about being able to play the human card as an excuse to leave. Amanda scoffed mildly in Alice's absence.

_'She is so weird!'_ Amanda thought, not for the first time. She was always bemused by Alice's behavior. Amanda pursed her lips and filled her mouth with air, giving herself blowfish face and then released it in a puff. She scoped the room and then decided to go find the boys again in the living room. Amanda peeked in to the hallway and saw it was empty. She could not remember which was she had come from so she turned right. '_Nope…this was Dr Cullen's office room. Wrong way,' Amanda_ decided to herself and she recognized the closed door that she had just been to previously. She was about to turn back when she saw another room at the end of the hallway with the door cracked slightly open. It was one that Alice had not shown her.

Amanda turned and shook her head, not wanting to be snoopy. But, after a few steps in the other direction her curiosity got the better of her. She pivoted swiftly and hugged her arm tightly to her chest and bit her lip. She took a few steps toward the open door, then a few more. Before she knew it she had her fingers wrapped around it and she carefully pushed the door open.

The room was still and quiet. It looked empty. So Amanda gently stepped inside to get a better look. It was just a bedroom. A very fancy, well appointed bedroom with a four-poster bed, but a bedroom none-the-less. Amanda was mildly disappointed. She had pictured a more interesting discovery since the room had been so strategically left out of the tour.

She was motioning to leave, when a figure caught her eye. By the window was the woman in white, now dressing in a lavender dress that ruffled elegantly round her thin, white shoulders and then again at her legs, just above her knees. The woman was so statuesque, not moving as she gazed out the window, sitting on the benched seat.

Amanda's eyes were again wide and none blinking. She was frozen in fear and not able to move. The woman looked so much like her own mother the morning she had found her dead in her own bed. So still, so pale…

Then Esme snapped out of her daydreams. She had been caught up in them and she hadn't heard Amanda's approach. Esme had been recalling memories of her little girl, Amy, and it wasn't until she smelt the familiar scent of Amanda did she turn her head towards the frightened little girl.

Amanda would have gasped if she were able to. That is how startled she was when Esme moved. It was like watching the dead come to life. Esme stood gracefully, and smiled, reaching out to Amanda slowly, but not coming any closer. Amanda stepped back again and hit the doorframe, stopping her from going any further.

"I didn't mean to frighten you, Darling," Esme cooed. Amanda took a breath and relaxed slightly because at least now the woman in white seemed alive again…less scary. "Are you alright?"

Amanda nodded, but didn't take her gaze off of Esme. "You look like someone I used to know," she mumbled in her soft, childlike tone. Esme smiled, but there was sadness in her eyes. She wasn't sure if she could ever forgive herself for starting this whole mess. If she had not killed herself and waited a few days longer, Amy would have been found alive in the woods of Challis, Idaho and the cycle of motherless daughters would have never began.

"You remind me of someone too, my dear," Esme admitted. It was hard to be frightened of someone so lovely and kind looking. Amanda found herself not so scared anymore, but more intrigued.

"I'm sorry," Amanda apologized, not sure what else to say, but feeling guilty for barging in on Dr Cullen's wife. _'This must be their bedroom,' _she deciphered.

"Don't be. I am glad to finally meet you, Amanda. I have heard such wonderful things about you," Esme told her frail, whippet of a granddaughter. She took a few steps towards Amanda to test if the girl would allow it. Amanda didn't move, so she continued to approach her. Amanda scrunched her face in thought.

"Really?" she asked, not seeing how anything nice could have been said about her. She had been so rude to Dr Cullen since she had first met him. _'Maybe Alice lied and made something up,' _Amanda rationalized. Esme chuckled and nodded, her loving smile comforted Amanda. This woman in front of her was like her mother, only kinder and lovelier.

"Yes, dear. My husband tells me you are very brave and strong-willed," Esme told Amanda. It was true, but Amanda had never thought of these attributes as being a good thing to have. She needed them to survive.

"I guess," Amanda uttered. She was stunned that the doctor would have said anything nice about her. It was more than she deserved.

"You've been through a lot lately," Esme spoke clearly. Amanda cringed. "Life is not supposed to be that hard," Esme added. Amanda was starting to feel a bit sick to her stomach as her repressed memories seeped back into her consciousness.

"I don't want to talk about it!" she announced with a greater volume and urgency. Esme nodded quickly, her soft features remorseful, but she brought out a smile.

"Okay. We don't have to talk about it if you don't want to, Darling,"

And Amanda grew silent, but watched Esme intently for a few seconds. She was trying to figure out the puzzle that in her mind that made no sense. It was too much of coincidence for Dr Cullen's wife to look so much like her own mother and there not be a reason for it. Amanda struggled to find reason, but it was too complex a problem for her mind to comprehend.

Esme sighed, knowing this, and reached out a hand to Amanda. It took a few more seconds for Amanda to react and take the icy, white hand extended to her. She felt a shiver tingle down her as she grasped onto Esme's hand. It was oddly comforting, though, and not as frightening as she would have imagined to take hold of the woman in white.

*

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A few hours had passed since Amanda had arrived at the Cullen residence. Her impromptu meeting with Mrs Cullen, who insisted she call, Esme, went quite well. Alice met up with them shortly after their run in together with smugness all over her face that had Amanda suspicious and Esme thankful to her for her psychic tendencies.

After Alice stole Amanda away from Esme, Tyler had whipped out the black marker from his pocket to satisfy Alice's wish to sign Amanda's cast. Emmet also was amused by the ritual and drew a big happy face on palm side of the cast. Jasper signed too since everyone seemed to be taking part.

Now, Amanda and Tyler sat together on the floor, bumping into each other as they moved their bodies unnecessarily while playing 'Monster Jam' on Emmet's Xbox 360. They had taken a break before and played the board game 'Risk', but Amanda had found it so painfully dull that Jasper suggested they put it away and do something else.

"Hah ha!" Tyler explained as he bashed his truck into Amanda's and it lost control and went flying off the track and burst into flames. Amanda dropped the controller in her lap and pouted.

"Not fair…I have only one good arm to play with. You have two!" she made an excuse.

"I still beat you!" Tyler thrilled, not brought down by Amanda's words. Emmet nodded and held up his hand for Tyler to high-five. Tyler obliged, feeling less daunted by Emmet's large size as he had been before.

"I don't want to play anymore," Amanda hissed and shoved the controller back to Emmet. She stood up and sighed. She was never much into video games anyway, but losing to Tyler was hard for her anyway since she was used to beating him more often than not when it came to anything they competed in.

"It is getting close to five, Alice. We should probably get them home," Jasper spoke responsibly. Alice nodded and Emmet frowned. He had been enjoying playing video games with the kids. They were easy to win against, he found and he rather liked watching their slow, human reactions to things.

"To the garage!" Alice beamed excitedly. She was looking forward to seeing Tyler's face light up when he saw Emmet's jeep! It was a life-like replica of the monster trucks in the video game. Tyler frowned. He was having too much fun playing video games with the older boys. He didn't have any other friends, besides Amanda. He was the nerd who skipped a grade. Playing with Emmet and Jasper was beyond 'cool' in his mind.

Amanda was neutral in her feeling of going back to Elizabeth's house. She didn't feel the pang in her stomach anymore when the idea of going 'home' was brought up. She was not quite ready to call Elizabeth's place her home yet, but it was a hell of a lot better than Donna's place.

"Come on, you two! Don't doddle. I promised Elizabeth to get you back before you needed to eat!" Alice sang. She skipped along, twirling a bit as she encouraged them to follow her outside and to the garage. In truth, Amanda and Tyler were full of junk food now and would not be hungry for a while anyway, but Alice didn't understand this concept.

Once outside and in front of the garage, Alice beamed a toothy smile, anticipating the reveal. She pushed the remote control on the side of the building and the large, industrial sized door began to slide up towards the roof. Jasper and Emmet stood back and watched in amusement.

"WHOA!!!" Tyler blurted out in true blissfulness as he saw the shiny, display of high-end vehicles lined up before him. He ran forward to get a better look, not sure if he wanted to start at the right or the left. As soon as he saw the gigantic, blue jeep on the end, his mind was made up. "So cool!"

"Oooo…cars," Amanda quipped sarcastically, walking up slowing behind him. Alice giggled and put her arm around Amanda.

"You like that, do you?!" Emmet's voice boomed as he hurried over to Tyler.

"YEE-AH!" Tyler answered without having to think about it. She reached out to touch the wheel but retreated his hand as two legs that were sticking out from underneath the red convertible beside slid to the side a bit.

"You can touch it, Kid! It won't bite ya!" Emmet laughed. Tyler turned his attention back from the pair of shapely legs in dark denim blue jeans to the monster-sized truck.

"These cars are all yours?" Amanda asked, stunned by the collection. There were five vehicles in the garage. Emmet's blue jeep at one end, followed by a red convertible, a green Camero, a silver Audi, a yellow Porsche, and a empty space where Carlisle's black Mercedes usually parked.

"Well, Rose is a bit of a car nut!" Alice explained. "She'd have more if she could. But who needs a dozen cars, right?"

"The jeep is Emmet's and Carlisle has the Mercedes, but all the rest are Rosalie's and she lends them out to us when she is feeling generous," Jasper told Amanda and he poked his foot out at the denim covered leg under the convertible. "My preference is for the Camero,"

"I like the Porsche," Alice announced, followed by, "Hint hint, Rose!"

Then, swiftly and in one fluid motion, Rosalie came gliding out from under her car and hopped up from the scooter board she had been lying on. She brushed herself off and wiped her hands on a white rag. She was flawless even with black grease smudging on her porcelain, white skin.

Amanda was thrown again by Rosalie's beauty even though she had expected it. Rosalie noticed and smiled politely.

"Amanda," she greeted in a chime-like voice. Amanda waved back.

"Hi, Rosalie," she answered shyly. Rosalie noticed Amanda's bright cast and frowned. It was so hideous and clumsy looking, even partly hidden by the sling. Alice still had Tyler's black marker in hand and she skipped to Rosalie and gave it to her. Amanda lifted her arm a bit in offering. Rosalie raised her eyebrows, but didn't refuse. She took the lid off and drew a perfect rose on the top of the cast, right on the part covering the hand. Amanda was impressed.

She loved the drawing the best of all. It was so beautiful, just as Rose was. Amanda wished she could one day look half as pretty as Rosalie did. Tyler was finished with inspecting the Jeep now and came around the side of the convertible to take a close look at it. He had his hand out to lightly poke at the chrome door handle, but before he could make contact he stopped.

"Wow…" he whispered as he finally caught a glance at Rosalie. His face went all dopey-like and he smiled nervously. Emmet chuckled and Alice and Jasper shared a quick moment of amusement. It was silent for too long. Tyler was still gawking at Rosalie with infatuation.

"Nice to meet you, Tyler," Rosalie said out of courtesy only. She was flaming inside at the thought of the boy touching her prized vehicles. Tyler mumbled something incoherent. Amanda rolled her eyes.

"Okay! She's perfect! We get it! You don't need to stare!" Amanda burst out, waving her left hand in front of Tyler's face. He barely blinked. His smile never left his face. In his mind, Rosalie was the perfect girl. He foolishly decided he liked her in 'that way' and tried to snap himself out of looking like a moron.

"We'd better get you two home," Alice interrupted Amanda's attempts to get Tyler's attention away from Rosalie. Amanda huffed at Tyler and agreed. She was annoyed now and was not sure why. She was ready to leave. Tyler didn't react. He waved goodbye to Rosalie with a dopey grin permanently stamped on his face. He was a touch out of breath and wheezing gently.

Emmet's jeep roared to life and Tyler was able to draw himself away from the stunning beauty that was Rosalie Cullen. Rosalie went back under her red M3 and continued to fiddle with the inner workings of the great machine.

*

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*

"Bet you wish you had your inhaler with you now! You sure made a jackass of yourself back there!" Amanda sniped at Tyler as the blue Jeep tore out of sight, leaving them in front of Elizabeth's house. She has been silent the whole drive back from the lake house. Tyler was still panting lightly from meeting Rosalie Cullen.

"What is that supposed to mean?" he asked, hurt by Amanda's sudden nasty strike. He saw his mother driving up, right on time as he spoke.

"She took your breath away! That is really pathetic, Ty!" Amanda snapped at him and she turned and hurried inside, leaving him standing out there as Mrs Davis drove up into Elizabeth's driveway. Elizabeth was right at the door when Amanda stormed in and caught the door before it slammed.

"Amanda?" she inquired out of concern. She poked her head out the front door and saw Tyler getting into his mother's station wagon. She waved and Mrs Davis waved back accordingly and then backed out of the driveway. Elizabeth shut the door and locked it. Then she headed to the small guest room she had makeshift turned into a little girl's room for Amanda.

"Amanda? Is everything alright?" she asked, seeing Amanda on the floor, cross-legged, leaning against the small, white framed bed she had just set up this afternoon. She had really made good use of her day off. The bedroom was almost complete. Amanda could sleep on it tonight.

"Yes! I'm fine!" Amanda stated impatiently, annoyed by Elizabeth's interference.

"Well, that is good. Get yourself washed up for dinner. It is nearly ready," she told the sulking child and left her in the room. Amanda was a bit surprised by Elizabeth's words. She had not expected her to give up the press so easily. And the idea of another homemade meal was unthinkable to Amanda. She wondered if this was going to be ritual.

"I don't hear you washing your hands and face, Amanda," Elizabeth's voice called out pleasantly from the kitchen, but Amanda heard it loud and clear. She sighed and did as she was told to do. She wasn't very hungry, but in self-preservation she thought it was a good idea to eat as much as she could now in case things changed later on.

As Amanda cleaned up, she stopped and looking in the bathroom mirror. Her face was a bit livelier now after a few nights of proper sleep and proper meals. The sugar in her bloodstream was wearing off now, making her a bit sleepy, but she noticed how alert her large eyes were.

'_They look like mom's eyes,'_ she recognized. _'And kinda like Mrs Cullen's too..only hers are yellow looking,'_

In her young mind, she had made the distinction, but didn't understand what it meant. She knew that there was something strange about the Cullens, in more ways than one, but she couldn't pin point it. She hung the towel back on the wall and turned off the light and went to the kitchen. She made a conscious decision as she headed to the table.

She was going to get to the bottom of this mystery somehow....no matter what!

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**Review! Pretty Please! **


	13. Stepped On A Crack

**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Thirteen **

|Stepped On A Crack|

One month later….

Amanda woke up and realized what day it was. She normally tried to stay in bed as long as Elizabeth would allow her. However, this morning she had something else on her schedule. Today was Saturday, October twenty-fourth, the day she was getting her cast removed. With this as motivation she scampered out of bed and to the bathroom across the hall to ready herself for the day.

The last few weeks had gone fairly well. Amanda had gotten into a bit of trouble at school for swearing at Stacy Peterson. Elizabeth had to go down to the school and meet with the principal about it. Amanda didn't seem to think it was such a big deal. After all, Stacy had provoked her by knocking over her art project.

Elizabeth gave her a whole speech on 'taking the high road' and 'being the bigger person', but Amanda thought that was a load of rubbish and just agreed with Elizabeth to appease her. Amanda's punishment was a ban on her use of the television for a week. Amanda didn't tell Elizabeth, but she had never been allowed to watch TV at Donna's so it was hardly a punishment at all.

Other than being a complete disappointment to Elizabeth, Amanda thought, for she was always being reprimanded about her attitude, she was rather enjoying her life living at her new home. She was able to get a full nights rest, three full meals a day were always prepared for her, and her best friend was allowed to come over as long as her school work was done.

That was another problem. Although Amanda was doing a lot better at staying on task at school…she struggled with putting her thoughts down on paper. She had no patience and when she got stuck on something she had the tendency to give up. Elizabeth was quite insistent that Amanda did her homework as soon as she got to the office after school. And then she would preform her chores for Dr Cullen. There had been some strife with that issue as well.

Amanda was getting pretty good with using her left hand now. She brushed her teeth and combed her hair and then hurried to her room to get changed. Alice had been over a few times and loaded her closet with more clothing she knew what to do with. Amanda was more comfortable now coordinating outfits. Alice only sneered at her half the time she saw her now-a-days.

"Amanda, breakfast is on the table! It is hot now so drop what you are doing and come eat," Elizabeth called from the kitchen. Amanda was nearly done dressing anyway.

She put on a pair of blue jeans and a long sleeved t-shirt and grabbed her new favorite sweater. It was a black zipper hoodie with hot pink and white writing on the sleeves. She put on pink socks and a pair or black skater shoes that Alice didn't approve of. She wished for Amanda to wear dresses or skirts with a pair of Mary Jane's. Amanda was not brave enough for that yet. It was too girly looking.

"Amanda!" Elizabeth called out patiently as Amanda was coming out of the guest room she used as her own.

"I'm coming!" Amanda yelled. She didn't like to be told what to do and since Elizabeth wasn't going to strike her, like Amy had on occasion, or make her go without food as Donna would do, Amanda had a bad habit of losing her temper with Elizabeth. It was a good thing that the nurturing red head was patient and understanding with the girl.

"You put that attitude away, Amanda," Elizabeth said gently.

"Whatever," Amanda mumbled under her breath, but Elizabeth overheard. She had her glasses on that morning since she was not working and didn't feel like wearing contacts. She slipped them off her face and onto the top of her head so Amanda could see her eyes when she spoke.

"This is my day off, Dear. I have plenty of things on my to do list and if you can't behave yourself we can stay home and you can keep the cast on for a few more days. It is of no hardship to me," Elizabeth said strictly, but not intending to be cruel.

"What? No!" Amanda whined. Elizabeth turned from the stove and added an egg to her plate and then turned off the oven. She walked up to the table and took her place, pointing to the seat across from her. Amanda flopped down with a harsh glare sent Elizabeth's way.

"Put it away," Elizabeth said softly, looking around for her glasses for a few seconds before remembering they were on her head. Amanda noticed her fluster and scoffed a laugh, but stopped when Elizabeth's eyes told her not to push her luck. Elizabeth slid her glasses onto her nose and she picked up the morning paper to read while she sipped her coffee. Amanda heaved a sigh and stared at her plate of eggs and toast. The eggs were a little bit runny in the middle, but cooked to perfection. The toast was sliced in strips for her to dip in the egg. It wasn't long before Amanda forgot that she was annoyed with Elizabeth and she ate her meal without making a fuss.

It wasn't that Amanda disliked Elizabeth. On the contrary, she liked Elizabeth quite a great deal. The only problem was that Amanda did not know how to properly show affection and she lashed out in inappropriate ways. Elizabeth was aware of this and held no grudge on Amanda for her outbursts. She knew it would take time and love to gain Amanda's trust. She wanted Amanda to know how much she truly cared for her.

Amanda was mostly lashing out at herself. She was frustrated because she didn't understand how to be loved. She had never felt love before. Even though she did love her mother, she said the words out loud. Amy had never taught Amanda how to express those feelings. And for this fact, Amanda was distraught to have lost her mother and bitterly angry with Amy for taking her own life.

In Amanda's mind, her mother had sent her a message by killing herself. It was: I don't love you enough to live for you. This message read loud and clear as apposed to the lack of affection.

*

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"Morning!" Alice sang in her high voice as she skipped down the stairs and joined the family in the living room.

Emmet was playing 'Halo' with Jasper on the XBox and Rosalie was perched on the sofa with her feet up, looking very human as she flipped through a magazine. Esme was painting at an easel by the window. Carlisle was getting ready upstairs for his workday.

"Good morning, Alice Dear," Esme told her tiny daughter who was bright with enthusiasm.

"Hey Mom!" Alice replied and gave Esme a quick hug and a peck on her cheek. Esme smiled appreciatively. Rosalie gave Alice the 'stink eye' and in return Alice stuck her tongue out at her blonde sister.

"What do you have planned for the day?" Esme asked as she flicked at the canvas lightly with her paintbrush.

"Oh, I don't know. I thought if Dad doesn't mind I would go with him to work. Amanda is getting her cast off today!" Alice exclaimed excitedly as if it were her big day. She liked to live vicariously through Amanda. It was thrilling for Alice to spend time with a real, human child, even if Amanda was not the typical little girl. Alice didn't know any different. Amanda was the first human Alice had ever been close to.

"I don't see any problem with you coming to work with me today, Alice," Dad said from upstairs in his study. She beamed and clapped her hands together in her joy. Rosalie rolled her eyes. She thought Alice was a suck up, but Alice was just being herself.

"Why do you even bother?" Rosalie inquired with a pained tone. She was still under the opinion that getting too close to Amanda was going to be a problem. Alice ignored Rosalie's question and knelt on the armrest of the sofa facing Esme.

"You want to know something really interesting, Mom?" Alice looked up to Esme and asked. Esme smiled and stopped painting to give Alice her full attention.

"Of course, Darling," she cooed peacefully.

"Well, Amanda told me that when she first saw you she thought you were an angel," Alice shared. Esme's smile remained, but her brow furrowed slightly. She waited for Alice to continue. "She told me that she dreamt of you and in her dreams you were shining in the sunlight,"

"Really?" Esme gasped, intrigued. Alice nodded vigorously.

"Yep yep! And that is why she was frightened of you at first. Not because of what you are,"

"What we all are," Rosalie piped up, not raised her eyes from her magazine. Alice ignored that comment as well.

"I am glad she is no longer afraid of me," Esme admitted. She wanted so much to be able to see Amanda more often, but the whole family, besides Alice, thought it was best to keep a distance for the most part. Amanda had seen Esme only twice after the day she had spent at the Cullen house with Tyler.

"She is very interested in you. She asks me about you quite often," Alice admitted. Esme smiled. She liked the thought of having a granddaughter. She had always hoped to have that life when she was human. Rosalie had this in common with Esme. She had also dreamt of having children of her own. A wish that could never be fulfilled now in her stagnant state.

"You should tell that little brat to stop being so snoopy!" Rosalie let her misplaced anger out by snapping at Alice. Esme gave Rosalie a stern warning look.

Amanda had convinced Alice twice to have her over to play video games with Emmet on the weekends. Amanda pretended she liked 'Monster Jam', but she in truth she was more curious about Esme and just wanted an excuse to get close to her. Alice knew why Amanda was inviting herself over and encouraged it in spite of her families' wishes. It was obvious when Amanda came over it was not to play with Emmet.

"She is just curious, Rose," Alice offered her opinion kindly. "You would be too,"

"Whatever. She is getting too noisy for her own good. It is not safe for any of us to have her here!" Rosalie huffed.

"We won't hurt her," Alice stated surly. She smiled and ignored her sister once more.

On both of these prior meetings, Amanda was still hesitant around Esme because of how much she reminded her of her own mother. She hardly spoke. Alice thought it was adorable, and Esme was just so happy to see her daughter's little girl alive and looking so much healthier than the first time she had seen her. Even if the encounters did not amount to much, they were still worthwhile.

"She is sure doing a lot better now in Elizabeth's care," Esme stated. She remembered the first time she had seen Amanda. It was the night that Amanda had come to return Alice' coat before she planned to runaway. Esme recalled how gaunt and frail the child had been. Amanda had more color to her cheeks now and had possibly gained a few pounds since that time.

"Mhmm…Liz is great with her! She doesn't let her get away with stuff. She's the only one Amanda listens to," Alice shared with her mother, like it was gossip.

"She seems to follow your lead as well, my dear," Esme informed Alice, "You have quite the influence on her,"

"Well…you know!" Alice chirped and shrugged her shoulders modestly. Esme was right. Amanda looked up to Alice because she was 'cool' in her mind. And the first female friend Amanda had ever encountered. She was a role model in some ways. Amanda often wondered what it would be like to always be happy like Alice was.

"It is a big responsibility, Alice," Carlisle said as he entered the room, dressed neatly for work with his coat draped over his arm and his black, leather briefcase in his hand. "She needs guidance. Remember that when you are around her. It can't all be fun and games, my dear,"

"Sure, Dad. I will keep that in mind. Thank you," Alice responded pleasantly. It was too much positive for Rosalie to handle. She stood up abruptly.

"I am going hunting. Emmet!" she said bluntly, ordering Emmet to go with her.

"Rose…" Esme whispered softly and tried to sooth.

"I just need to get away from this Brady Family Moment. It is too much!" she said and Emmet moped away from his game and joined her as they headed out of the house and into the woods. Carlisle smiled sympathetically to the others and then kissed Esme goodbye for the day.

*

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A half an hour later, Amanda had finished eating breakfast, washed her face, and was ready to get going. She put a headband on to keep her long hair from falling in her face and she zipped up her hoodie. Elizabeth knew how anxious Amanda was to have the bulky, neon cast taken off. It was in the way and a real thorn in the girl's side.

They drove the short drive through town and followed all the speed limits and road signs. Amanda was fidgeting eagerly. This day had taken forever to come. She had not been able to have a proper bath, or climb trees, or write anything neatly in four whole weeks.

"Amanda, hold your horses!" Elizabeth said as they pulled up in the parking lot next to the medical building. She had not even parked the car yet and Amanda was attempting to open the door. "Dr Cullen has an early appointment before he can see you so there is no point in throwing yourself out of a moving vehicle to get there faster,"

Elizabeth was nearly laughing at Amanda's enthusiasm. It was so rare to see the girl excited for something. The only things Amanda was usually pleased about was seeing her best friend Tyler or going over to the Cullen house to spend time with Alice and Emmet. Elizabeth thought that was the reason Amanda wanted to go over to the lake house, anyhow. She didn't notice the connection between Amanda and Dr Cullen's wife, Esme.

"You drive too slow!" Amanda complained, not meaning to be rude. Elizabeth chuckled and put the car into park and turned off the engine.

"The speed limit on Main Street is thirty kilometers per hour. It is not my choosing to drive at that dull pace, Amanda. The limit is set to keep pedestrians safe," she explained to the child the reason for the lulling speed they had to take through town. Amanda was already out the door and slammed it shut. Elizabeth smiled and got out of her driver's side and before she could close her door, Amanda was already around the corner of the building.

Elizabeth hurried to catch up with the child at the door and they entered the lobby together. The bell chimed, but no one was around. Faintly, Dr Cullen's voice could be heard through the walls as he spoke with a patient. Then the door of exam room one opened and Mrs Fromms exited followed by Carlisle.

Elizabeth saw no sign of impatience on the doctor's face. The hypochondriac woman was a regular. She was a bit flushed and was wearing about six layers of clothing and held another winter jacket in her hand.

"Good morning, Mrs Fromms," Elizabeth greeted as the middle aged woman stepped up to the reception desk. "Lovely day, isn't it?"

"You don't work Saturdays," Mrs Fromms responded. Carlisle smiled at Elizabeth who was stunned just a bit by the sharp tone the woman took with her. She had always got the impression that Mrs Fromms didn't like her.

"Amanda is getting her cast removed today," Elizabeth explained pleasantly, taking a note from Carlisle's page on dealing with clients. Mrs Fromms looked to Amanda and nodded and then faced Dr Cullen again.

"You are certain this is not the Measles? I have not been vaccinated in a long time," she asked him with real concern. He shook his head reassuringly and repeated himself for the third time this morning.

"It is only a heat rash. Take off some layers and cool down. It will clear up without medication,"

"But I could catch pneumonia out there!" she argued, pointing to the mildly cool, cloudy day that it was outside. Elizabeth resisted the urge to laugh. It would not have been professional. Amanda didn't have the same restraint and scoffed. She had been out in colder weather than it was today with nothing but a t-shirt on and had survived. Mrs Fromms glared at Amanda.

"Amanda, why don't you go take a seat on the table in exam room two. I will be with you shortly," Carlisle instructed. Amanda nodded and walked around Mrs Fromms and down the hallway. Alice came out of her father's office and met Amanda in the hall and skipped up beside her.

Amanda heard Dr Cullen showing Mrs Fromms to the door and reassuring her again that she was perfectly healthy. Alice opened the door for Amanda. She entered and climbed herself up on the exam table and waited for Alice to say something odd. That was the ritual, Amanda had figured out. It kept her entertained when she was with the impish teenager. Alice was like no one else she had ever met.

"This is so exciting, isn't it?" Alice stated. "I mean….Dad is going to use an actual saw to cut off that cast! Oh, but don't worry…he won't get close enough to saw through your arm. Although, I am sure that has happened to people before. Can you imagine? You go to the doctor to get your cast sawed off and you end up losing an arm?"

Alice giggled and jumped up to sit next to Amanda on the exam table. She crossed one leg over the other and kicked it merrily. Amanda watched her incredulously. She had had two other casts removed in the past and each time had been a simple process, neither of which had scarred her permanently.

Alice didn't realize how strange her comments were. She was just making conversation and rambling. Before she could continue putting irrational fears into Amanda's mind, Carlisle entered.

"Alright, Amanda. I bet you are anxious to get this cast removed," he said, closing the door behind him and smiling at the two girls watching him. Alice beamed and nodded for Amanda, who was still eyeing the tiny, black-haired teen. Alice had never seen a cast up close before or seen one being removed. Everything human was so new to her she was like a kid in a candy shop.

"Ya," Amanda answered. Carlisle had prepared the room for this already when he had arrived in the morning. Alice had helped him fill a basin of water to rinse off the arm when it was free from the plaster molding. After grabbing the small, yet extremely sharp, saw he stepped up and took Amanda's cast in his hand.

"Are you ready? This will be a bit noisy, but it won't hurt at all," he told her. Amanda nodded and Alice perked up to watch. The saw turned on and motored away as Dr Cullen aimed for the cast.

"WAIT!" Amanda yelled out urgently just as the saw hit the hard cast. Good thing nothing could startle Carlisle. He calmly turned the machine off.

"Amanda?" he questioned.

"You've never cut anyone's arm off with one of those things, right?" Amanda asked innocently. The seed had been planted and even though Amanda was smart enough to know that nothing bad would happen, she felt the need to ask. Carlisle smiled and then raised his eyebrows at his daughter. Alice pursed her lips and shrugged.

"No, of course not, Honey. I won't get close enough to your skin for the blade to touch you. Trust me," he reassured Amanda.

"Okay…go ahead then," Amanda said, relaxing a bit. That was all she needed to hear.

Carlisle agreed with a kind smile and went to work. It went as smoothly as he had promised and as Amanda remembered. The cast came off without a hitch and they cleaned her arm and dried it off. It was a bit stiff from lack of use, but it looked about the same as her other, thin wrist and forearm.

"It appears to have healed beautifully, Amanda," Carlisle told her, examining her wrist. He rotated her hand a few times and felt around the bones with his cool fingers. "How does your arm feel?"

"Good," Amanda replied.

"Any pain when I do this?" He asked Amanda as he bent her hand forward and back gently with very light pressure. She shook her head, no.

"No," she answered softly. When Carlisle moved her hand it almost felt like he was poking at a bruise, but it wasn't painful. Just a bit stiff.

"Well then…looks like you are free to go!" He told her and smiled kindly at her. She gave a quick smile of gratitude to him and then slide to the edge of the exam table to jump down. "Oh, and Amanda…" he added as her feet hit the floor. She looked up at him and bit her lip. "Your debt is repaid. I no longer require your services after school,"

"Really?" Amanda asked, perking up, her eyes smiling. She had not seen that one coming. She had forgotten about the debt. Helping out everyday after school had become a routine.

"I discussed this with Elizabeth yesterday and we calculated the time you have put in and the cost of the car has been covered. You are free to do as you wish with your afternoons from here on out," Carlisle told her with great pleasure, knowing she would be pleased with this news.

"Okay!" Amanda agreed, happy about her freedom. She had missed seeing Tyler after school each day. He sometimes came and helped her with her chores, but that was not the same. She headed for the door, ready to get going. Alice followed and hugged Carlisle on the way out.

Amanda caught the father/daughter moment and watched curiously. She wondered what it would be like to have a father and mother. Amanda noticed how much Alice appeared to love Dr Cullen and it made her chest feel tight with envy.

"See you at home, Dad," Alice sang as Amanda turned hastily from the scene to leave. She hated to feel envious. She wanted to like Alice.

"So, What do you want to do today, Mandi?" Alice asked as she danced down the hallway ahead of Amanda. She twirled around a few times and then hopped into the lobby and waited.

"I dunno," Amanda admitted. She had not thought past the point of getting her cast taken off. Elizabeth was waiting on a chair and stood up when the two girls appeared.

"Looks good," she told Amanda, pointing to the little girl's arm.

"Ya," Amanda responded.

"Did you remember to thank Dr Cullen?" Elizabeth asked. Amanda had no time to lie, and her sideways glance gave her away immediately. "You'd better go back and tell him,"

"THANK YOU!" Amanda yelled out loud. Elizabeth sighed. Alice giggled and covered her mouth. Carlisle heard Amanda as he was tidying up the exam room. He chuckled to himself. The stern face Elizabeth gave Amanda made the little girl shrug sheepishly.

"Shame," was all Elizabeth said softly, but only for Amanda's ears. Amanda was surprised she was not getting a harsher talking to, but the single word left her feeling guilty for not thanking Dr Cullen properly. The disappointing look in Elizabeth's eyes made Amanda repent and it was the best lesson in manners she had received in a long time.

"I have some things to get done at home. Are you coming with me?" Elizabeth asked Amanda, not dwelling on Amanda's rude behavior, "You are welcome to join us too, Alice, if you'd like,"

"I don't want hang around the house," Amanda spoke up, "Tyler got a new bike for his birthday. He was going to teach me how to ride it!"

"That sounds nice. Does Mrs Davis know you are going over there?" Elizabeth asked to make sure. She kept a tight watch on Amanda now that she was in her care. Amanda was so used to doing whatever she wanted when she lived with Donna and it had taken her a while to adjust to Elizabeth's concern for her whereabouts.

"I don't know. Probably," Amanda answered impatiently, "Alice is coming with me so it doesn't matter!"

It was true that whenever Alice was with Amanda, Elizabeth didn't worry about her. And Alice was a 'big kid' in Amanda's train of thought so she liked having the pixie girl with her for more than just her odd company. She was like a cool babysitter who hung out with her. Tyler had really begun to like Alice too.

"I will make sure Amanda is home by five, Liz!" Alice piped up to smooth things over and to assure Elizabeth that Amanda was taken care of.

"Thank you, Alice. You two have fun today then," Elizabeth told the girls as she left. She found it a bit peculiar that Alice, a freshman in high school, would want to hang around a fourth grader. However, Alice was not the typical teenager and all of Esme and Carlisle's children were not like other kids so Elizabeth chalked it up to good parenting on the Cullen's part again.

*

*

*

Alice and Amanda had made it a few blocks towards Tyler's house when Alice suddenly jolted to a halt. She grimaced and grabbed her head in pain and hunched over. Amanda was not sure what was going on.

"Alice?" she asked. The pixie vampire flopped to the sidewalk and sat on the curb and held her head. "Alice? Are you okay?" Amanda repeated, getting worried now. She crouched down to face Alice. She pulled at her hands to remove them from her face, but they were like iron bars that would not budge.

"Alice?! Alice!!" Amanda screamed, trying to get a response from the teen, who was rocking back bit. Alice finally moved her hands from her face and Amanda shrieked and stumbled back. Alice's eyes were large and where her huge hazel irises had been, there was mostly white. Alice's eyes were rolled back.

There was no one around to help. It was a side street they had chosen to take. Amanda didn't know what to do so she ran for help. She felt like crying, but in her panic, she could only run. She sprinted all the way back to the medical building and burst in.

Meanwhile…Alice was stuck in a terrifying vision. She was on a plane and the oxygen was depleting and the cabin shook violently as the whole thing was losing altitude fast. The overhead lights of the cabin began to flicker and there was a loud sound of one of the engines blowing out. A flash of orange was seen outside the right windows of the aircraft.

Alice wanted so badly to exit this vision, but she was unable to set her mind straight. She was still seeing the frightening images of the passengers screaming and being tossed around the plane as it rumbled towards the Earth.

Finally with one solid blow, the vision evaporated, as did the images of the plane hitting the ground at top speed. Alice lurched forward and held herself in comfort. She realized right away that Amanda was no longer with her. She trembled, not being able to rid the images of the scared people on the crashing plane from her memory.

Alice wanted to save them all, but there was no one to tell. She didn't know when or where this was going to happen…she only knew that it would happen and that it was out of her hands. It was the worst kind of vision. One she had no control over. The guilt was unbearable.

Just as Alice was getting herself up to go find Amanda, the worried little girl was bursting into the lobby of the medical building.

"Dr Cullen!" she cried, her voice high and urgent. Carlisle had heard footsteps running by on the pavement, but he had not expected them to be Amanda's. He immediately got up from his office desk and went to see what the problem was.

"Dr Cullen!" Amanda cried out again as she ran down the hallway to find him. He came out of his office and she nearly ran into him. He caught her.

"Amanda? What is it? What's wrong?" he asked calmly. She was panting heavily. Tears fell from her eyes.

"Alice!" she gasped and took his hand and tried to pull him to follow her. He was a hard and stiff as a rock statue and the momentum from the tug only sent her back into him where he stood. "Something is wrong with her!" she shouted.

"Alice is hurt?" Carlisle asked, confused. He knew there was no way Alice could be injured.

"I don't know. She was holding her head and shaking. It was like a seizure or something!" Amanda cried remembering the time when a boy in her class had a seizure. He had epilepsy and had to be taken to Prince George by ambulance. Amanda pulled on Dr Cullen's arm again. This time Carlisle let her tug him along. He realized what Amanda was scared over. Alice had had a vision and it had startled the child. There was no way to explain Alice's sight to Amanda so he was forced to play along.

They got outside just as a trembling Alice was stepping up the sidewalk towards them.

"Alice!" Amanda called out and ran to the small, thin girl and wrapped her arms around her in a hug. Amanda had never hugged another person on her own will before. She didn't even notice she had done it at this time. The moment was still too tense.

"I'm sorry. So sorry," Alice spoke. Her voice was broken and her tone was grave compared to how it usual was. Carlisle nodded and scooped her up in his arms, cradling her like he would if she was human and was not able to walk. Amanda followed him into the building and he told her to take a seat while he took care of Alice. She obeyed and sat down on one of the chairs in the lobby.

Carlisle whisked Alice into the first exam room and sat her down.

"I am sorry, Dad," Alice apologized. She was worried she had given something away to Amanda by not being able to stop her vision from taking her over. Carlisle shook his head.

"No, don't be. Amanda thinks you were having a seizure. I will come up with something. Are you alright?" he spoke in a low whisper so there was no way Amanda could hear from the lobby. Alice nodded, but her eyes were wide like saucers. He knew she had witnessed something tragic. He pulled her into him and held her.

"Oh, all those poor people," Alice sobbed, but no tears fell. Carlisle sighed slowly and rubbed Alice's back until she was calm. Then he told her to stay put while he talked to Amanda. Alice agreed and curled up into a ball, rocking on her heels rhythmically.

"Is she okay?" Amanda blurted out as she jumped from her seat and ran to Dr Cullen. He nodded and motioned for her to sit back down. She did so quickly and he took a seat next to her.

"Alice is feeling much better," he told Amanda who was still concerned for her friend. "She didn't eat breakfast this morning and her blood sugar was very low. The reason she collapsed was she became lightheaded and dizzy,"

"She looked like she was in pain," Amanda added softly. Carlisle took this into consideration.

"She may have felt a slight bit of discomfort at the time, Dear, but she is not in any pain," he reassured Amanda. She believed what the blonde doctor was telling her. After all, he would know about this sort of thing and Amanda knew he would have taken good care of his own daughter.

"So, she is better then?" Amanda inquired, wanting to make sure.

"Yes. I gave her something to sip on and she is resting now, but she won't be able to go with you to Tyler's house today I am afraid," Carlisle explained. Amanda understood. She nodded and he smiled at her and gently touched her shoulder. "Would you like me to drive you to Tyler's house, Amanda?"

"No. I will walk. I think I will go home, though. I don't feel like riding bikes right now," Amanda said sadly. Carlisle felt badly for Amanda having to see Alice go through one of those sorts of visions. It was not pleasant for Alice, but to a child, seeing a friend in pain was frightening.

"Don't worry about Alice, Sweetheart. She will be on her feet in a few hours. You can see her tomorrow if you'd like,"

"Okay," Amanda agreed. Dr Cullen's words of comfort had helped a bit. She headed to the door sluggishly. Then she remembered something she needed to do. She turned back around to face him.

"Amanda?" he asked, since she didn't speak right away. She found it hard to do, but she knew it was the right thing.

"Thank you, Dr Cullen," She told him sincerely. It was meant for helping with Alice and for removing her cast earlier that day, but she didn't need to specify. He appreciated the gesture and smiled his usual, kind smile at Amanda.

"You're welcome, Sweetheart,"

*

*

*

A quarter of an hour later, Amanda got home to Elizabeth's house and made her way in through the front door. The TV was on in the family room. There was a low, mumbling of voices in the background and as she walked up closer Amanda could tell it was a news program.

She didn't know where Elizabeth was. It was strange for her to come in the door without Elizabeth asking her how her day was. And surly, Elizabeth would want to know what happened to her plan of riding bikes with Alice and Tyler. Amanda didn't think too much of it until she actually read the headline on the TV.

'Boeing 737 goes down in the Rockies'

Amanda didn't understand what that sentence meant. She reread it to make sure she had the words right in her head. She did. Then she noticed a piece of paper on the coffee table, all crumpled and wet. She picked it up to read it.

It was a bunch of words that overwhelmed her. But it looked like a schedule of some sort. And just as Amanda was about to give up on reading the mangled white and black transcript she saw the name, 'Cole Roth' on the top. And to the right it had minuscule picture of an airplane with the logo, 'West Jet' underneath it.

There was a soft swishing sound, like someone gasping for air, behind her. Amanda jumped and pivoted to see what it was. Elizabeth had been there the whole time, in the kitchen. She was on the floor, leaning against the counter, holding herself and staring out at Amanda blankly.

Her face was red and sticky with tears although she no longer was crying. Her face was almost apologetic towards Amanda. Elizabeth did not want the child to see her like this now. Amanda, for the second time today, knew she had to get help.

As she reached for the phone to call, she read something on the television that was easy for her to understand.

'No Survivors!'

* * *

**Please Review!**


	14. Arrangements

**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Fourteen  
**

|Arrangements|

"Hello, Dr Cullen speaking," Carlisle answered his office phone. Amanda was on the other line anxious to reach him. His number was the first one on a list of emergency numbers Elizabeth kept taped by the phone.

"Can you come over please?" Amanda asked nearly in tears. Elizabeth was still on the floor, crying without any sound, looking straight ahead into open space.

"Amanda? What's the matter? Is everything okay?" Carlisle asked, recognizing the distress in the little girl's voice.

"I don't know what to do," Amanda told him, her voice cracking as the worry turned to tears that streamlined down her cheeks. She didn't even know Cole, Elizabeth's husband, but she had seen the pictures of him on the walls and knew how much Elizabeth loved him. She was only eight, but she knew that his death was devastating and sad and that she should be upset. This was her first time someone close to her was going through the same thing she had gone through and empathy was a new emotion for Amanda.

"Is Liz hurt?" Carlisle asked. He was beginning to feel fear and Alice appeared beside him and took his hand. "Amanda?" he asked because there was a long pause on the line.

"There was a …a…crash," Amanda stuttered, whispering the last word because she didn't want to say it in front of Elizabeth. Alice could hear Amanda's voice over the phone and both she and Carlisle locked eyes in horror. This was the vision that she had of the plane crashing.

Alice fell to her knees, with her face in her hands in grief. _'Oh no. Cole! Liz's Cole!' _She gasped internally as the reality hit her of who was on that plane. Alice shook with upset and Carlisle tried to compose himself. He took a breath and talked to Amanda again as calmly as he was able.

"It's going to be alright, Amanda. I am coming right now. You stay there with Elizabeth. Help her to stay calm. Can you do that?"

"Y-yes," Amanda replied. She had tears rolling down her face.

"Good girl. I will be there soon, Sweetheart," Carlisle comforted Amanda and then hung up the phone. Amanda did so on the other end as well and wiped her face the best she could with her sleeve and made herself stop crying. For Elizabeth's sake.

Meanwhile, Carlisle hurried to get his briefcase and Alice picked herself off the floor and followed him. It didn't take them long to get in the car and drive to Elizabeth's home. It would have been faster to run, of course, but they could not risk being seen in the daylight on a Saturday afternoon.

"She will need an escort to Alberta," Alice whispered somberly, already seeing that Elizabeth would have to go to Edmonton to meet up with Cole's family to make arrangements concerning his passing.

"I will take her, of course," Carlisle answered dutifully. Alice nodded, already seeing this future in her mind. Her father was the most generous, compassionate man.

"And Amanda will need someone to care for her for a few days until Liz returns home," Alice added already knowing the outcome to this as well, "She will stay with us. It will work out, Dad. I promise,"

"If that is…" Carlisle said and then paused to sigh. "What we need to do to help Liz through this. We will make it work," He was a bit concerned having a human child living with his family of vampires. Even as controlled as the family was, there was still a risk.

At the same time as Carlisle and Alice were driving over to Elizabeth's home, breaking the town's speed limits with caution, Amanda was watching Elizabeth's near catatonic state of shock in absolute terror. She remembered her own mother's death so vividly. Upon finding her mother's dead body, Amanda had been like Elizabeth too. Complete shock. Only, Amanda hadn't been able to cry. Not that first few days anyway.

"Dr Cullen is coming over," she told Liz and she took a few steps closer to the woman who was the closest person Amanda had ever known as a mother. She wanted to make Elizabeth's pain stop. The way she had wanted someone to make her pain go away when she was so sad. Now Amanda was realizing there was no way around it. This pain was too strong.

"He'll be here soon," Amanda whispered softly, not wanting to bother Elizabeth, who finally moved her head to stare at the frightened little girl. Elizabeth reached her arms out to the child and Amanda gulped back a lump in her throat and walked to her. Amanda was scared to get too close, but something inside her told her that she should help Elizabeth. Amanda slowly walked up and then got down on the hard kitchen floor too.

"Come here, my darling," Elizabeth croaked, each word was barely audible. Amanda let Elizabeth hold her and sooth her.

"Everything is going to be okay," Elizabeth hushed gently, as she held the little girl tightly. Amanda was not sure why Elizabeth was rocking her and rubbing her back in console when she was not the one who had lost a loved one. It was Cole that died, not anyone Amanda knew. But the soothing words and rocking were for Elizabeth's comfort more than Amanda's.

There was a light knock at the door and not a second later Carlisle let himself in the house. Alice waited back a bit, not wanting to intrude. The blonde doctor made his way to the kitchen and approached Elizabeth very carefully, getting down to her level.

"Liz. I am so very sorry. I am here to help you through this," he told her in earnest. Elizabeth had Amanda hugged snugly in her arms with her face resting gently on the top of the young girl's head. She closed her eyes tightly and tears fell, but she nodded at Carlisle's words.

"Can I please help you up and over to a more comfortable place? The chesterfield or your bedroom perhaps?" he offered, holding out a hand to her and talking as soothingly as he knew how. Elizabeth nodded and tried to speak. She did not want to be in her bedroom. There were too many photographs of Cole in that room.

"T-the s-so-fa," her dried hoarse voice choked out. Carlisle nodded and took her hand as she let Amanda go and let him help her to standing. She was not steady on her feet and her head was heavy from crying. Her body shook. Carlisle had no trouble at all transporting her to the living room sofa and sitting her down, releasing her, but keeping her wrist in his hand to count her pulse.

She was most definitely in shock, which was understandable. Her pulse was rapid and weaker than it should be. Her breath was shallow. She was very alert and reasonable yet. Carlisle had seen people far more distraught with the resent lose of a loved one. Elizabeth was a very strong, rational woman. She was handling this remarkably well under all circumstances.

Amanda had followed them into the living room, but stayed back in fear. Carlisle turned to her.

"Amanda, would you please get a blanket or a quilt for Liz?" he asked of her softly. She nodded and did as he asked right away. It helped to calm her down to have something to do. A way to be useful. "And Liz, I'd like for you to lie back and rest for a few minutes," Carlisle said, facing Elizabeth once more.

"But, what about the phone calls and the--?" Elizabeth asked in a shaky voice, knowing there was going to be a lot to deal with. "There is so much to do,"

She was so used to being the planner, the organizer. She always took care of things when there was something needing to be done. Carlisle shook his head gently and helped her to ease her body down on the sofa.

"I will take care of everything, Liz. You just rest," he told her and swung her feet up with ease and placed them on a pillow. He made sure she was comfortable and Amanda came back with a baby blue, velour blanket and handed it to him. Elizabeth was worn out from crying and was starting to warm up and come out of her shock.

"Thank you, Amanda," Carlisle said, taking the blanket from the child and draping over Elizabeth to keep her warm while she rest. He was hoping she would sleep now that her pulse was becoming steadier. He would make all the traveling plans for them to go to Edmonton as soon as he was able to leave Elizabeth's side for a moment.

Carlisle continued to give Amanda instructions. He didn't think Amanda needed to stick around while Elizabeth was in such a grave state. "Jasper is on his way to pick up Alice. Why don't you go with them and I will make sure Elizabeth is alright, okay Sweetheart?" Amanda could only agree. She didn't know what else she could do and this seemed like as good a plan as any. She nodded. Carlisle smiled weakly, for he was deeply morose with the stress and sadness of this situation. Alice poked her head in the door to make herself useful. "Good girl," Carlisle told Amanda when she agreed to his suggestion, "Alice will help you get ready to go,"

Alice reached a hand out to Amanda and Amanda gulped and did as she was instructed again. She followed Alice to the room she slept in and watched as Alice skillfully opened each drawer and the closet and began filling a duffel bag with clothing. It was not long before Alice was finished gathering her things and she silently took Amanda outside to wait for Jasper. They didn't speak. There were no words for the tense moment.

*

*

*

"She is coming here?" Rosalie asked shrilly, as Jasper was hurrying out of the house to pick up Alice and Amanda at Elizabeth's home. He nodded as he took the keys to the green Camero off the key rack hanging on the wall beside the phone in the kitchen. Rosalie had not heard the news yet, but when Alice called Jasper to come pick her and the child up to stay over for a few nights she was not pleased.

"Yes. Alice said there was a horrible plane crash and Elizabeth's husband was involved," Jasper explained in a hurry. "Dad is going to take Elizabeth to Alberta to meet up with the family and he thinks it is best if Amanda stays with us for a short while,"

Emmet had the TV on and Esme took the remote from him and turned it to CNN. She covered her mouth and a gasp with her delicate, white hand. This was the first that the Cullen family had heard the news of the deadly plane crash in the Rockies.

"Oh, dear Heavens," she sighed and gawked at the blinking television screen. Emmet frowned and looked down to his lap and shoved his remote control aside. He had planned on playing some video games, but he was no longer in the mood. Even Rosalie grimaced at the news. She liked Elizabeth as far as human's went. She was sorry to hear that she had lost her husband.

"I don't understand. Why do we need to take care of the child?" Rosalie questioned somberly. "Shouldn't she stay with Elizabeth?" Rosalie was concerned more than upset. She didn't want to have a human living with them. She was afraid that Amanda would get too close to them and learn their secret. Then they would be forced to move from Kipta after just nicely getting settled and accepted by the town folk.

"Rose, we have to help Elizabeth in her time of need. She can't possible take care of Amanda if she grieving and dealing with funeral planning. Carlisle is right," Emse told her daughter gently. Rosalie didn't argue with her mother. There didn't seem to be a way around this. Amanda had nowhere else to go.

Jasper was long gone now on his way to pick up the girls from Elizabeth's house. The family would have to do their best to act human for a few days when they babysat the child. It wouldn't be easy, but they could manage. Amanda was quite self sufficient on her own. They would make due, like Carlisle had said.

"It is the least we can do," Esme whispered to herself. Amanda was her granddaughter after all. She closed her eyes away from the flashing screen with wreckage photos now being displayed by helicopter. She knew the pain of loss very well. She wished there was more she could do for Elizabeth right now.

"Mom?" Rosalie asked lightly, touching her mother's smooth shoulder. Esme turned to face her blonde daughter. "Amanda can have my room. I will go set it up for her," Rosalie said. The generous offer was out of character for Rosalie, who most often thought of herself first, but Esme smiled and hugged her in gratitude.

"I will help, Rose," Emmet agreed and got up off the floor and they both took off to quickly reorganize the room upstairs for the little girl. It was the most girly room of the bunch and was fit for a princess. All they needed to do was remove any objects that could hurt Amanda or the items that Rosalie did not want to chance being broken.

They made sure everything was in order in the room and the bed was neatly made and pushed the backboard against the wall. Emmet put some books and games on the stool of Rosalie's vanity for Amanda in case she needed them. And Rosalie found some towels that were stored away in case they had human guests over at any time and put them in the on suite bathroom that never was used.

"Looks human enough, right?" Emmet asked Rosalie, making sure they had gotten it right. She scoped the room and nodded. She was not sure what else she could to do to change the room.

"I think it will do. I guess I will be 'sleeping' in your room for a few nights," she told Emmet. They were going to have to pretend to go to bed in the evenings now that Amanda would be in the house. Emmet smirked and pulled her tight to him. She shook her head. "We can't misbehave. Not with her in the next room. We will literally have to pretend to be asleep at night. No noise,"

"Right. I wonder if I used to snore?" Emmet took into consideration. Rosalie rolled her eyes and let him go. He sometimes was a bit dense when it came to serious situations. That was one of the things that she adored about him most times, though. He had childish quality to him. He was going to be innocent and naive forever.

They could hear the Camero pulling up into the drive at that moment. Rosalie stepped to the window and looked out over the front yard as Jasper pulled the car up in front of the house. Alice got out first, followed by Jasper. Amanda exited the car carefully and took a glace around the huge property. Jasper took her bags and a pillow out of the trunk of the car. Amanda's arm was quite stiff from being in a cast for a month, so she was grateful to not have to carry her own things inside.

"I guess this is it," Emmet commented and Rosalie took his hand as they started out the window down at Amanda.

It was going to be a strange few days in the Cullen home...

*

*

*

Elizabeth had warmed up and calmed down. She fell asleep from exhaustion and Carlisle took this time to make some phone calls.

First, he called the airport and booked a flight to Edmonton for that evening. He was lucky to get the last two tickets aboard that plane. It left from Prince George at eight that evening. They wouldn't have to leave the house for another few hours. Carlisle was glad to let Elizabeth rest.

He also made plans to catch a return flight home for himself the next morning. He would be able to leave Elizabeth with family once they arrived in Edmonton. He left Elizabeth's return flight itinerary open since he was not sure how long she would need to be in Alberta.

The next few calls were to Cole's family to inform them of Elizabeth's travel plans. Those calls were the most difficult since he did not know the family and it was hard to speak over the phone to strangers after a tragedy like this. It was Cole's sister, who was able to take the call without falling to pieces. Cole's parents were not available.

"Yes, that is correct. We will arrive at twenty after ten at the Edmonton Airport," Carlisle confirmed after Sarah, Cole's sister, reread the information he had just given her back to him.

"Thank you so much for doing this. We are having a hard time organizing at this time and Elizabeth should be with her family. You are kind to escort her," Sarah said in a teary voice from the other end of the phone line.

"It is my pleasure to do anything I can for your family," he replied, "Elizabeth is a dear friend of mine,"

"Elizabeth told me you were a good man. She is lucky to have you as a friend. We can't thank you enough for doing this," Sarah told Carlisle. He felt guilty that he was getting praise for something that seemed only the correct thing to do. "We will have a room set up for you when you get her, Mr Cullen,"

"Please, call me Carlisle. And thank you, but that will not be necessary. I have an early morning flight to catch and will be fine in a hotel closer to the airport for the night,"

"If that is what you wish, but you are more than welcome in our home if you should change your mind," Sarah said, not wanting to push the strange man she had just come to know over a stressful phone call into staying the night. She didn't know why she trusted Carlisle so implicitly after only this meeting, but she did. It was his soothing, compassionate nature that lured Sarah to like Carlisle.

"Thank you, Sarah. We will see you shortly," Carlisle closed the invitation.

"Yes. I will be there to pick you both up at the gate," Sarah agreed, "See you then,"

"Take care, Sarah,"

Then Carlisle hung up the phone and put his hand on his face in remorse. As a doctor he was used to seeing death on occasion and dealing with grieving patients. However, his patients, no matter how close he had come to know them in the time of their treatment, had never been someone he knew on friendly basis. Elizabeth was a great friend to him and he was hurting inside for her loss.

He thought of Esme and how his existence would be pointless if he should ever lose her. He was fortunate that was not likely to be the case. Carlisle removed his hands from his face and turned to watch Elizabeth at peace in her sleep. He wanted to make this whole ordeal go away and make her happy again.

Carlisle sighed and shook his head at the fragility of life. He composed himself and without making a sound he began to pack a carry on bag for Elizabeth, leaving out her more personal items to give her privacy. He would allow her to do that when he woke her. For now he planned to let her sleep until it was nearly time to head to the Prince George Airport.

*

*

*

"Hello, Darling," Esme cooed as Amanda and Alice came through the door. Alice smiled and guided the little girl into the foyer with one hand. Amanda was a bit unsure of the events happening. She had no say in the matter. She was a bit confused why she could not stay with Elizabeth, but was not feeling brave enough to press the matter.

"Are you hungry, Mandi?" Alice asked. It was only mid afternoon. Amanda shook her head, no. She was feeling a bit sick to her stomach. There was too much going on and she was worried about Elizabeth. Rosalie and Emmet came down the hallway to the large foyer to greet Amanda.

"She looks a little green," Emmet mumbled so low and quiet Amanda didn't hear him. Alice blinked as to agree with him. Esme and Rosalie shared a sad glance at one another. Jasper sighed and held up Amanda's bag. He did his best to send out a feeling of hope in the room to calm everyone.

"Do you want to see the room where you will be sleeping, Amanda?" Esme offered, holding out her hand. Amanda nodded, feeling utterly worn out and desperate. She took Esme's hand and let herself be led down the hall and then up two flights of stairs to the third floor.

"You'll love Rose's room. It is fit for a princess," Alice chirped. "You will be right next door to my room in case you want to visit!"

"Where will you sleep?" Amanda asked Rosalie in a soft voice, turning her head back as they walked to the room. Rosalie was trailing behind them.

"She can bunk up with me!" Alice announced, almost too cheerfully. Rosalie's eye grew wide in horror, but she repressed the urge to appose.

"Do not worry about it, Darling. While you are here with us you are our guest," Esme explained to Amanda, wanting to make the child feel welcome.

"Guest of honor!" Alice tacked on.

"Yes, what ever you need, Darling.. you just ask any one of us. Okay?" Esme told Amanda as they stopped in front of Rosalie's bedroom. Amanda agreed, but didn't say a word. She walked into the lace filled bedroom and stared in awe at the four-poster bed with a canopy and white lace drapes hanging from the top.

The room was everything she had ever dreamed of. It was like the bedrooms that the girl's in fairytales slept in. There was a vanity of carved dark wood that matched the bed frame and a dresser with a large mirror attached. There was a bookshelf and a French writing desk pushed against one wall and the windows were large and wide, with bench seats lining them.

"Do you like it?" Alice asked, knowing that the well-appointed room took Amanda by surprise.

"I've put out some towels for you in the bathroom. It is right through this door," Rosalie explained, not waiting for Amanda to answer Alice's question. "I was not sure what you liked for reading, but you may help yourself to anything on the bookcase,"

"I found some games to play!" Emmet butted in, sticking his head in the room.

"That does sound like fun!" Alice chirped, trying to lighten the gloom that everyone was feeling.

Amanda took a deep breath. She was certainly overwhelmed and not used to being such the center of attention. The gloriousness of Rosalie's fine bedroom had literally taken her breath away. She knew this was not the time to be happy, but she was rather intrigued with the beautiful surrounding. Under any other circumstance she would have been secretly thrilled to stay there.

"How about it, Runt?!" Emmet asked, playfully. He was the first to lose sight of the sadness that was lurking the room. Rosalie shot him a glare and Esme frowned momentarily. Alice thought about it and could see that Amanda would feel better if she was kept occupied.

"I think a game would be nice. Something not too strenuous," Alice suggested. Jasper entered the room and felt everyone's anxiety and especially Amanda's nerves. Tranquility slowly crept through the atmosphere oblivious to Amanda only. Esme touched her son's shoulder and under her breath thanked him.

"How about it, Mandi? What do you fancy? Monopoly, Clue, Cranium, Life, Risk…?" Alice coerced her to pick one of the games that were sitting on the stool of Rosalie's vanity.

"I do love a good game of Risk," Jasper shared his personally preference, hoping to sway Amanda and try to get her onto the game. The last time they played she thought it was boring, but he was not going to give up. He thought he could teach her to love the game of world domination if he let her be on his winning team!

"Cranium is the best!" Emmet voiced his opinion. Rosalie shook her head.

"Not that one…it is too busy!" she huffed at Emmet

"Kids…" Esme warned softly, "Let Amanda decide what she would like to play. She is our guest,"

"Sorry, Mom," Alice and Emmet mumbled together. Then all eyes went back to Amanda. All of them were eager to hear her pick. Amanda had not played most of the games she saw on the chair so she blurted out the only one she had played before with Tyler.

"I guess 'Life' would be alright," she said, almost shrugging in concede. They all stared at her for a moment. No one blinked. They did not need to, but they usually did it as part of the human charade. They were all thinking of how ironic Amanda's choice was. None of them were living and none of the actions in the game of Life was ever the norm for them.

"Life it is!" Alice sang, swiftly picking up the game from the middle of stack and pulling so fast that none of the others toppled. Amanda noticed and blinked and watched the pile curiously. Esme left the room and shut the door behind her.

"Have fun, kids," she told them. Then she whispered so softly, only for her own children's ears, "Be careful. She has been through enough for one day. No slip-ups. Be on your best behavior,"

*

*

*

It was a long hour drive to Prince George Airport. Carlisle had woken Elizabeth only when it was time to leave. He helped her pack and then got her comfortable in his black Mercedes. Elizabeth was too emotionally stunned to speak so she just stared out the window, trying to make sense of the day.

Every now and then, as she reminded herself that her husband was dead and that she needed to accept that, she would cry. Carlisle gave her his free hand and silently kept his eyes on the road as he drove. Elizabeth didn't mind his cool touch. She was used to it and it was the familiar hand of a good friend. She knew what he was doing for her was beyond the call of duty. She was so grateful, but had not the words to tell him at this time.

At the airport, they boarded without any problems and Carlisle let Elizabeth fall asleep again on his shoulder as they took off from the runway. He watched her eyes flutter and she moaned a few times. He stroked her arm and hummed words of reassurance into her ear to calm her.

Once they landed, she was too sleep ridden to walk, so he gallant lifted her into his arms and unboarded the plane with her cradled to his chest. She came to as they came through the gate and the cool Edmonton air hit her face. It practically bit her nose with chill. Her eyes cracked open and she blushed, feeling silly to be carried like a child.

"I can walk," she mumbled and wiggled to be set down. Carlisle obliged and helped her get her footing. Elizabeth insisted on taking her own carry on. She thought she had put enough burdens on Carlisle already.

"Your sister-in-law, Sarah, should be here. Do you want me to come with you or will you be alright to travel onward with her?" Carlisle gave Elizabeth the choice to have him accompany her to the family's home in the city.

"No, no. I will be fine. I will have my family. You should go home to your family. And…and…tell Amanda I am all right. I don't want her to be upset. Tell her I will be home soon," Elizabeth spoke so clearly now it was hard to tell she had been through a traumatic event. Carlisle nodded and held onto her carefully so she would not fall over in her frailty.

"Liz," Sarah said, already by there side. She was a younger girl of about twenty-one, and was fair skinned with a few light brown freckled on her nose and cheeks. She had brown hair and blue eyes that were red in the corners from crying.

"Sarah," Elizabeth sighed in return and Carlisle let his grip on her arms go so they could embrace. He was pleased that the young Sarah was so steady and able to take Elizabeth home safely.

"Thank you," Sarah whispered to Carlisle, not noticing his outer beauty for she was too impressed with his kind heart to judge what she was seeing with her eyes.

"It was the least I could do," he admitted somberly.

"It meant so much, Carlisle," Elizabeth told him, touching his gloved hand and squeezing it. She tried to smile to thank him, but it came out more of a twitch and then she let his hand go.

"You take good care of yourself," Carlisle said, "Both of you,"

"Thank you," Elizabeth said, "For everything. Knowing Amanda is in good hands is more than I could have asked for,"

"Don't worry about Amanda. We will make sure she is safe until you return home. You'll call when you know your return flight, won't you? I will come to get you," Carlisle insisted. Elizabeth agreed and took Sarah's hand as they left the airport into the crisp night. Carlisle watched them leave with his brow furrowed, wishing there was more he could do.

Then, once they woman had left his sight; Carlisle took a seat on a bench and waited until morning to catch his plane back to Prince George. Only mentally, was this a grueling task for him to wait. He thought of how many lives were going to change after this accident.

*

*

*

Back in Kipta, the mood had shifted to a more peaceful setting.

After the game of Life commenced, Amanda soon was at ease with Jasper by her side. Alice was so proud of him. She tried her best to resist the urge to gaze fondly into his eyes. She was taking what Esme said to heart. Amanda did not need to know the intricacies of the relationships in their household. Rosalie had to push Emmet away from her a few times during the game to in warning when he got to close to her.

It got late and Amanda's stomach, now accustomed to eating regular meals from her time spent with Elizabeth, let it be known that she was hungry. They all took her down to the large kitchen, that was so spotlessly clean and empty, Amanda wondered if they ever used it for cooking.

Amanda ate the soup and sandwich that Esme prepared for her, but was confused when everyone else disappeared to do chores at that time. They all had some excuse as to why they were not joining her for dinner. Amanda didn't know what to make of it, but she felt awkward eating alone with Esme watching her.

After dinner, She gave into Emmet's begging to play video games on the flat screen and tried her best to not think of Elizabeth and the last time she had seen her. The memory of Elizabeth so distraught had Amanda nearly in tears when she remembered finding her that way.

Amanda's chest would tighten and she would fight to get enough air in when she inhaled, but this feeling never amounted to much more than that. She somehow was able to relax very quickly in the presence of the Cullen kids. Amanda had no idea that Jasper was the reason she was not falling to pieces.

However, it grew late and she was hardly able to hold her head up straight so Esme shooed the others away to their rooms for the night and took Amanda up to bed.

It was not long before she had brushed her teeth and washed her face and put on her pajamas. She crawled into bed reluctantly, feeling strange in her new surroundings. It was a very large room and there was something that was so perfect and still about everything in it. The pictures of Rosalie and Emmet and the others that were sitting on the shelf were strikingly odd to Amanda's eye. The Cullens were all so beautiful and looked the same in every photograph.

Amanda tried not to think any bad thoughts. She turned off the lamp on the nightstand and quickly tucked herself into the fluffy quilt, so that it covered all of her, but her eyes. She could hear no sounds coming from the silent house. It made the hallow whooshing of her own breathing sound so much louder and she tried to stop the noise from escaping her mouth.

No one was around. She was alone in a strange place. Worst of all, it was the home of the man she had chosen to despise, and she was stuck with his odd family for a while. Amanda's face got warm and the prickle of heat burned her eyes until tears slid out. She was frightened…worried that Elizabeth might not come back for her now.

She didn't want anyone to hear her crying. She didn't like to be coddled. Amanda was used to being alone when she cried.

Esme could hear Amanda's soft sobs through the door and had to hold herself back from going into Rosalie's room to comfort the child. She so very badly wanted to pick Amanda up in her arms and hold her close and tell her how much she loved her and how sorry she was to have left Amy so many years ago.

Esme dry sobbed at the sounds of the little girl crying. She blamed herself for all the pain Amanda had to endure. If she had not killed herself all those years ago, Amy would have had a mother to love her and teach her to love others. And subsequently, Amanda would have had a mother to teach her that she was worthy of love as well.

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**Please Review!  
**


	15. Making Waves

**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Fifteen  
**

|Making Waves|

The morning was grim with rain spattering against the large windows of Rosalie's bedroom. Amanda had barely slept at all that night. It was a combination of the wind and rain, thoughts Elizabeth's loss, and thoughts of her own loss, that had kept Amanda from sleeping.

She was balled up tightly, holding herself so firm when she finally conceded to morning and let body stretch out a bit she felt stiff. She flipped onto her back and held the covers up to her nose and peered out at the room, trying to familiarize herself with it before she would have to get up to use the washroom.

The large, lavishly decorated bedroom was less daunting in the light of day. Even if the light was shades of grey because of the gloom that lured outside. Amanda was not nearly as frightened in it at daybreak.

The perfection of the bedroom was just as strange to her as the perfection of the Cullen family. They were beautiful, rich, and pleasant. Three things that Amanda was not used to and did not trust. _'They can't be all good. They are hiding something,'_ Amanda stewed in her thoughts as she glanced to a framed photograph of the family on the nightstand. They didn't look a day younger than they did in the present.

Amanda stayed in bed as long as she could to avoid drawing attention to herself, but her bladder got the best of her before long and she got up to use the washroom off the bedroom.

She walked into the bathroom and turned on the light switch. The size of the room shocked her even though she had brushed her teeth in it last night. It was bigger than any bedroom she had ever slept in before last night. There were two sinks and the huge walk in shower was separate from the sunken, jacuzzi. The counter tops were hard stone of some sort that seemed to have flecks of gold in them. Amanda wondered if it really was gold since the Cullens appeared to have a lot of money. She touched the hard counter with her fingertip and studied the rock as she brushed her teeth.

Then she pulled her hair back and tied it in a sloppy ponytail. She didn't care what she looked like. Amanda then washed herself with one of the ivory face cloths that was left in there for her to use. She noticed when she finished washing how the dark circles were back under her eyes again. She heaved a sigh and threw the towel down on the edge of the tub and turned off the light.

Amanda found her duffle bag in the closet, but she was perturbed to find it empty. Someone had unpacked her things for her and neatly folded and hung them up on the left hand side of the large closet. Amanda frowned and shook her head. _'Alice is so weird!' _

After slipping off her unnecessarily frilly pajamas that Alice had chosen for last month on their shopping trip, Amanda put on a pair of new jeans and a long sleeved, hooded shirt that buttoned in the front. She was annoyed that her favorite jeans with the hole in the knee were nowhere to be found. They felt the most comfortable and less stiff than the newer, tighter pants that Alice insisted were more in fashion.

Amanda grabbed her raincoat out of the closet and stuffed her arms in the sleeves and zipped it up. She wasn't planning on staying inside all day, so she knew she would need it. Then she took a deep breath and eyed the door. She couldn't hide from the beautiful people much longer. She could hear some clinking of pots and pans coming from downstairs as she ventured out into the hallway.

Meanwhile, in the kitchen, Esme was doing her best to prepare some food for Amanda. She had not cooked for a child since 1971. Although she was once a great cook, she was a bit rusty now and the smell of the food was not appealing so she was having a difficult time judging whether her food was turning out correctly.

"Cookies! All kids like cookies!" Esme told herself as she pushed some fresh baked, blueberry muffins to the side of the counter. Then she began to make the oatmeal, coconut, chocolate chip cookies that she used to prepare for Amy when she was a little girl. They had been her daughter's favorite.

The Cullen kids had all taken off early that morning to hunt. They wanted to be topped up so that there would be as little temptation as possible when it came to being around Amanda. Jasper was sure that she would be safe. He felt that everyone was controlled enough around the child that no harm would come to her. However, it was better to be safe then to have a dead little girl on their hands.

Esme had gone hunting last night. Her eyes were a rich, yellow-gold that sparkled with joy because there was a child in her home again. She never thought she would have this experience again. As she baked she hummed. She was just finishing up putting the last spoonful of cookie dough on a sheet when she heard Amanda's footsteps coming from the hallway above her. Esme smiled upward.

She waited patiently for Amanda to come down the stairs and into the kitchen. When Amanda appeared Esme smiled warmly and greeted her.

"Good morning, Darling. Did you slept well?" Esme questioned Amanda, knowing full well that the little girl had cried for hours last night and then was awake most of the night sniffling. She hoped that Amanda would be feeling less sad today and was eager to get some nourishment into the child. Amanda nodded, but it was a lie. She had barely slept and was tired from the dreadful night. Esme's smile softened in sympathy, but she carried on with placing the cookies in the oven. She slid the cookie sheet in on the top rack and shut the oven door.

"I am making cookies, my dear. I sure hope you like chocolate chips!" Esme exclaimed in an attempt to cheer up Amanda who was looking a bit sour. All she could manage was another short nod and Esme reached out her hand to her and guided her to the table "Have a seat, Amanda. Would you like something to drink? Some milk? Juice?" she offered. Amanda wanted to get out of the house and go see Tyler, but she didn't want to upset Esme. She was so nice to her Amanda felt that she owed it to her to be civil. Just because she was married to Dr Cullen it was not reason enough to not like her, Amanda decided.

"Can I have some juice?" Amanda inquired. Elizabeth usually insisted she have milk in the mornings so juice sounded more appetizing. Esme beamed and agreed, hurrying to pour a glass of orange/mango juice in a short glass for Amanda. She set it down on the table. "Thank you," Amanda remembered to say.

"You are most welcome, Darling. What would you like to eat? The cookies won't be ready for another ten minutes and they will need to cool for a while after that. I can make you eggs and toast, pancakes, a sandwich…" Esme trailed off some options for Amanda. It was too many choices. Amanda was overwhelmed.

"I don't care," she replied, not rudely. Amanda was just not sure how to decide. She found herself the most shy around Mrs Cullen. She was so lovely and graceful. And every time Amanda got a good look at the stunning vampire, she was reminded of her familiar nightmares of the woman in white and her own mother.

"How about some bacon and eggs then?" Esme helped coaxed Amanda into a decision. The tactic worked beautifully and Amanda agreed. And it turned out to be a good selection because the meal was one of the best tasting meals Amanda had in a long time. She was hungry too and ate the whole plate full of food in a hurry.

Esme was pleased and cleared the table when Amanda was finished and had assured her that she did not want seconds. Amanda waited, awkwardly at the dining table for while, lingering. The last batch of cookies was in the oven now and the timer beeped on the stove for their removal.

Amanda almost missed it. Esme was so casual in how she reached in and took the hot cookie sheet from the oven. However, as she placed the tray down on the marble counter top, Amanda noticed the oven mitt on the adjacent counter, unused. She blinked twice and whipped her head to Esme, who had her back to Amanda now and was preoccupied with tidying the kitchen.

Amanda stood up and inched toward the counter and held out her hand to the tray. She was inches from touching the edge of the scalding, steel pan, when an icy grip wrapped around her wrist to stop her from proceeding. "Hello, Amanda," Dr Cullen said when Amanda gazed up to see him standing over her. He let go of her hand. "Careful," he told her gently and he smiled kindly. She nodded and gulped back her surprise. She didn't hear him come in. It must have been late morning if he was already home from the airport, she figured. Esme didn't seem surprised at his entrance at all. She didn't even greet him.

"How is Elizabeth?" she asked. She realized she had made a mistake when she saw Amanda staring curiously at the oven mitt on the side counter. Esme did her best to hide her slip up by not acknowledging the incident at all. Amanda sensed that she should not question it.

"She is with her family now. Her sister-in-law was a very lovely, young girl. She is in good hands," Carlisle explained somberly.

"Can I go now?" Amanda interrupted, a bit rudely. She didn't want to talk about the plane crash or Elizabeth now. She wanted to forget the whole thing had ever happened. And she had plans to see Tyler. They always hung out on the weekends.

"Where are you off to?" Carlisle asked Amanda. Esme was still smiling lovingly at the child. All she wanted was for Amanda to be happy.

"Tyler's house," Amanda contributed some of her plans to them, although she said it through grit teeth. She didn't like that the doctor was always so protective and concerning over her. _'Why do you care? You're not my father!'_ she angered internally.

Amanda had never had a father. That was perhaps where her anger for him stemmed. He was the first male character in her life that showed caring for her and compassion. His actions were always followed through with kindness and seemed to be non-conditional. This made Amanda irrationally scared of him. She kept pushing him away not realizing that it was because deep down inside she so badly wanted his acceptance.

She didn't know that she already had it. No matter how she acted towards him. Both he and Esme loved her. Amanda was their granddaughter and they felt strongly for the child that had come into their lives. They would not turn their back on Amanda.

*

*

*

"Hurry up, Emmet. We haven't got all day!" Alice pouted.

"Don't we?" Rosalie sniped. Alice stuck out her tongue at her sister and continued to bounce around. She wanted to go back home and be near Amanda. She could not see a clear future of the child. Amanda was going to see Tyler, Alice knew this much, but since they had no set plans Alice could not tell what the rest of the day held in store. It made her nervous to be blind in case Amanda got into trouble.

She was antsy to head back to Kipta. Their hunting trips always took a lot longer when they went as a group. The four of them all had different tastes when it came to mealtime. And Emmet was particular in is brand of bear.

They would have split up, but it was safer to travel as a pack in case one of them ran into a human when on the hunt. That way they had back up if one of them lost control and went for the kill. None of them wanted to harm a human being. It was a lot of stress for everyone and the guilt was immeasurable.

"Just pick a bear…any bear!" Rosalie instructed Emmet. She was finished hunting too. There was not a drop of blood spilled on her pure white, wrap around dress. She had gracefully tracked down a couple of mountain lions and fed. Jasper had conceded and let her have the pair of wild cats. They were his favorite, but Rosalie was a lady, so he stepped aside in a gentlemanly manner to let her take them. It was easier for him to resist his instincts anyway. Rosalie would have fought for them, surly.

"They are too scrawny. And that one is a baby. They don't taste the same!" Emmet explained as he ran deeper into the dense forest.

"Ooo! Oooh! Go that way, yes!" Alice cheered, pointing in the direction Emmet was already planning on heading. "I see a grizzly!" And by see, she didn't mean literally.

Emmet got excited knowing his meal was ahead of him. He caught the scent of something he liked and sprang into action and went off running to find it. Alice clapped her hands together quickly, but quietly.

"Carlisle should be home by now, Love," Jasper whispered to Alice. "He and Esme will take good care of her. There is no reason for worry,"

It would not be too much longer and Emmet would be finished and they could go home. Alice calmed down with Jasper's aid and took his words to heart. She tried not to worry about Amanda for the rest of the trip back home.

Alice was often called 'nosy' or 'snoopy' for how she meddled in people's lives. It was a part of who she was to act on her ability. She had more responsibility she felt because she had the power to change the future. If she could see it in time and rearrange present events, Alice could be helpful. The rest of her family urged her not to take on the world. She could not fix everything. The plane crash was proof of that.

*

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*

Amanda practically had to turn her back on Carlisle and Esme to get out of the house this morning. They seemed to want to know every detail about her day and she had nothing to tell them except that she was hanging out with Tyler. She was finally allowed out when she promised to stick to the path and call when she arrived at Tyler's house to let them know she had arrived safely.

Amanda was annoyed to do so, but she agreed to appease them so she could leave. Carlisle inquired if she had any homework to do in preparation for school the next day and Amanda lied and told him she had none. She didn't like math. She didn't have the patience for it. Besides, without Elizabeth to check her notebook, she could get away with not doing her math this weekend. _'Who needs math anyway?!'_ Amanda decided defiantly.

Carlisle showed her out the door and told her to have good time and to be home at 5 o'clock for dinner. She didn't answer him as she headed out the door and past the driveway. She only raised her hand in a slight effort to let him know she had heard him as she walked down the hillside to the trail around the lake.

It took her only fifteen minutes if she hurried to get past the lake and back into town. Tyler's house was fairly close to Main Street in a pretty little cul-de-sac. His house was a white, two-story home, with brown shutters on every window and a big brown door. The door had a stained glass window in the middle that made him warp in shape and color when he came to answer the door.

"Hey!" he stated with a genuine grin on his face and he held the door open wider for Amanda to step inside. Amanda did so and kicked of her checkers runners and stripped off her jacket. She hung it on the coat rack by the door.

"Didn't you hear?" Amanda asked him, confused that he was not frowning at her like everyone else was doing. Tyler's parents were in the next room eyeing her as subtly as they could. She had noticed their sadness, though.

"Ya," he said, his smile gone and his face fell. "It's really sad,"

Amanda nodded and looked at her feet. She didn't want to think about it. She was sorry she brought it up.

"Let's not talk about it today, okay!" Amanda said how she was feeling. Tyler agreed and Amanda perked up, glad to have him as a best friend. He always understood how to make her feel better and never once pushed her to do anything she didn't want to do.

"What do you want to do?" Tyler asked. Then he got excited and grew taller. "I have a new game for my Playstation!"

"Do you have any time left for gaming this week?" Amanda asked, noticing his mother walking towards them as if she had been eavesdropping. Tyler pursed his lips and squinted his eyes in thought.

"Mom?!" He called out not realizing she was already behind him. He whipped around to her. "Can we please play my new game? Amanda hasn't seen it yet and she really wants to play,"

Amanda tried not to laugh. He was using her as an excuse to gain more Playstation time. She didn't mind, though. It would be something to occupy her mind and she wanted to help him out if she could.

"Please, Mrs Davis?" Amanda added in her most appealing tone of voice. She actually sounded like a normal little girl when she did this. Mrs Davis eyed the pair of them and then conceded. She was like Esme in that she would do anything to make her child happy. And on this day she wanted to make Amanda comfortable seeing as she had bounced around from home to home this past year. The Davis house was the one constant in her life. It never changed.

"Alright, just for a little while," Mrs Davis allowed.

Tyler jumped for joy and it made Amanda grin. He ran to the family room that was off to the left and Amanda followed his lead. She forgot she had to call Dr Cullen. When the phone rang twenty minutes later she realized her mistake.

"Oh shit!" she swore. Tyler was used Amanda dropping the odd bad word, but never in his home. He looked around to make sure his mom was not around, thinking he would be in trouble for her saying it.

"Amanda!" Mrs Davis called from the other room. Amanda sighed and got up quickly. Tyler shrugged and hoped that his chances of playing video games would still live on. Amanda left the room and went in the hall where a phone was left off the hook on the table near the wall. She picked it up and didn't speak.

Carlisle could hear her breathing on the other end of the line and spoke first.

"Are you ready to come home, Amanda?" he asked her simply. He and Esme had given her the benefit of doubt when she hadn't called in case she and Tyler had chatted a bit when she first arrived at his house. But when she had not called after three quarters of an hour after her leaving the lake house they grew worried and looked up the Davis residence in the phone book.

"No," she answered.

"You were supposed to call us. It was part of the agreement for you to be allowed to walk to Tyler's house without supervision," he reprimanded her gently. It didn't sound like scolding by the tone of his peaceful voice.

"I forgot!" Amanda exclaimed, that being the truth and then her mouth got away from her and she sassed back. "I am not a baby, you know!"

"We know you are not a baby, Amanda. That is why Esme and I placed our trust in you today," he told her, "Perhaps we were wrong to assume you could handle such responsibility,"

"I forgot!" Amanda raised her voice, feeling threatened, "It is not a big deal. Now you know I am here!"

"Amanda please calm down and speak to me in a respectable manner. We are not being unreasonable. When you are under our roof and in our care you need to follow our rules. Elizabeth trusts me to keep you safe. We need to know where you are at all times,"

"Fine!" Amanda grunted impatiently, fighting the urge to slam the phone down on the receiver.

"I am willing to let this incident slide, but if you cannot keep your promises about your whereabouts you will force me to keep you under surveillance," he told her patiently. Amanda made a face at the gentle sound of his voice. She stubbornly did not answer him. "You have fun today, Amanda, and if you change your mind about being picked up from Tyler's house you may give us a call. You still have piece of paper I gave you this morning with our phone number on it?"

"Yes," Amanda said in a low, deep voice.

"Alright then. If we do not hear from you we will expect you home at five o'clock sharp," he explained one more time. Amanda gritted her teeth and forced her self to speak.

"Bye!" she said sharply and hung up the phone. She felt nervous inside. She was not sure why. It was because she knew subconsciously that she was in the wrong and that she had just been terrible rude to Dr Cullen, but she was too stubborn to see reason. She was annoyed with him right now.

"Can you stay?" Tyler asked as Amanda rejoined him again in front of the television set. She nodded and flopped down on the carpet beside and hugged her stomach and pouted for a moment or two, fuming over the scolding Carlisle had given her over the phone. She sighed and watched Tyler play the game for a while until she relaxed and began to enjoy herself again.

*

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*

"Do you think I was too hard on her?" Carlisle asked his wife after he hung up the phone.

"Are you kidding? You should have given her heck for being so rude to you!" Rosalie voiced her opinion. The kids were home now and had overheard the entire conversation that Carlisle and Amanda had on the phone.

"Amanda has been through an ordeal. She needs to be shown love and understanding. Getting angry with her will not help matters," Esme insisted. She stepped into her husband's arms and he held her. Esme put her head on his chest and closed her eyes.

"Your mother is right. I don't think Amanda would respond well if I were to be too hard on her. Patience is the key," Carlisle answered Rosalie as well. "And like your mother said; love and kindness are the only ways to reach a child,"

"Whatever! If I speak to you like that or hung up the phone on you I would be punished and you know it!" Rosalie argued. Carlisle raised his eyebrow at his blonde daughter. Her tone and her attitude now were getting her close to reprimand.

"Calm down, Rose," Alice piped up. Jasper was feeling the tension and looking frazzled already. He tried his best to smooth things over with a gentle push of tranquility. The emotion soon wafted the room and had the Cullen family in a better mood.

They discussed what their plans were for the rest of the evening and for tomorrow. Alice tried to get out of school for the day to be on 'Full Alert Amanda Watch' but that didn't fly. Emmet laughed at his tiny sister's attempt to ditch. Rosalie found it amusing too and was glad that Alice didn't get her wish. "No, she will go to school and you will all go to school as well. One of you, Alice perhaps since you are so eager, can pick Amanda up after class and make sure she gets home safely," Carlisle decided.

"Be very cautious. Amanda is quite observant and it is easy to make mistakes when she is in the house," Esme told the kids. "I forgot, this morning, to wear an oven mitt when I took out the last batch of cookies from the oven, and I have a feeling Amanda noticed my slip,"

"It was an accident. Do not blame yourself," Carlisle said softly, still holding his wife in his arms. He kissed the top of her head. There was nothing they could do to take it back. They had to hope that Amanda would not focus on that occurrence.

"I am sorry I was not paying closer attention to my actions," Esme whispered. Carlisle rubbed her arm and sighed. Alice sympathized with her mother and then caught a glimpse of the future. It was easy for them to know when she was having a vision. They waited for her to explain.

"Nothing major to be concerned about. Amanda will need a bath when she gets home, though," was her explanation. Carlisle opened his mouth to speak, but he decided against it. Amanda was a handful and there was no reason around it.

*

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*

Tyler and Amanda played video game for nearly two hours! Tyler was on cloud nine. He had never been allowed to play this much in one week. Amanda was happy he was pleased. She was not into the games as much as he was, but it was a good distraction. She was pretty good at 'Monster Jam' by now too. She beat all of Tyler's records by the time Mrs Davis came to tell them it was lunchtime.

Amanda ate a little bit of soup and a half of a grilled cheese sandwich. She wasn't very hungry since she had eaten a later breakfast that morning. Amanda was beginning to forget what it felt like to run on an empty stomach. Between the Davis', Elizabeth, and the Cullen's she was well fed this past few months.

"Why don't you two go play outside in the fresh air. It will do you good," Tyler's mom suggested as she cleared the plates from in front of them. Tyler was trilled to get out of doing the dishes. He was getting away with a lot of chores today because his mother was being overly considerate to Amanda's needs.

"Okay, Mom," he agreed happily. Amanda smiled briefly and nodded at his mom who had noticed the grey circles under her eyes. Amanda was looking worn out again from the stress of yesterday. It was not easy for Mrs Davis to see. She didn't always approved of Amanda's behavior, knowing from last year when she and Tyler were in the same class and the difficulty Amanda had staying out of trouble. However, Mrs Davis liked Amanda's loyalty to her son. He didn't have other friends.

"Thanks for lunch," Amanda squeaked quietly as she got up from her chair and pushed it into the table. Mrs Davis smiled and told them to have fun and to stay close to home. Tyler didn't need a run down of the rules. He knew where he was allowed to go and where he wasn't.

They headed out the door in their raincoats and walked towards the school playground.

After a few hours, it began to pour heavily and Tyler complained he wanted to go home. Amanda thought about it and decided that it was probably close to five anyway and she should head to the lake house so she would make it on time. They walked back to Tyler's house since it was on the way and she waved to him as he turned around at the driveway of his home.

"Bye!" he called out nicely.

"Bye!" Amanda answered to match his enthusiasm, even though she was sad that this were their goodbye for a while. She missed not having him in the same classroom with her anymore. And he didn't even go to the same school so she didn't get to see him at recess or lunch. Not to mention that he had piano lessons after school on Monday's and chores and homework to do on school nights. The weekends were the only playtime they really had together anymore.

It was pouring so hard there was no point running back to the Cullen's place. Amanda was drenched as it was. So she took her time and made a point of walking through all the big, muddy puddles along the dirt path on the way around the lake. She had mud up to her knees by the time the large, white house came into view.

Carlisle and Esme were watching from the second floor living room. Amanda jumped and splashed down in a puddle so large it made waves and the water that splashed reached as high as her head. She was spotted in mud, but having a good time.

"Well, at least she is going to be on time," Carlisle said with a smirk as he and Esme exchanged a look.

*

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*

Amanda was not in trouble for showing up soaking wet and covered in dirt. Alice was the most annoyed because of the state of her new cloths. She carried on and on about how they would have to go shopping again to replace these one. Amanda didn't see what the big deal was. They could be washed.

After Amanda had a bath and dried herself, Alice pulled out a new set of pajamas for Amanda to wear. This little nightgown was just as girly as the other one she had, but had long sleeves and a ruffled drop collar. Amanda cringed when she saw herself in the hallway mirror and the way to the kitchen. Once she was dressed and warm Amanda obeyed Esme and ate some dinner. She noticed again how everyone disappeared.

"I don't like carrots," Amanda mentioned as Esme eyed her plate that was clear expect for the small pile of untouched steamed carrots.

"They are good for you, Amanda. Try a few, please," Carlisle spoke up from behind a newspaper.

"If they are so good why aren't your kids sitting here eating them?" Amanda asked slyly. Carlisle smiled and put down his paper on the table. He had just forced down several mouthfuls of potato, salad, ham, and carrots for show. His outward demeanor did not display is inward turmoil. He was able to keep up the human charade very well.

"They have already eaten their supper before you came home," he explained.

"Why don't you all eat together? That is what normal families do, I thought," Amanda interjected quickly before this topic could be dropped. Esme was not able to conceal her emotions as well as Carlisle. Amanda noticed she seemed a bit nervous in waiting for Carlisle to speak.

"We do most times, Amanda. But the kids spent the day hiking. They were too hungry to wait for you this evening," he told a white lie to keep Amanda from learning the truth about their lifestyle. Carlisle did not like to lie, but in this case he had no other option. He was still able to hold a smile even though he was on trial by Amanda. She had no choice but to believe this was the truth and that she was just being silly to think that something was weird about their eating habits. Amanda dropped the topic.

However, she put a mental note in the back of her mind. This had been the first time she had ever seen any of the Cullen's eat something in all the time she had been around them. She finished eating her dinner, but deliberately left the pile of carrots on the plate.

"Would you like a cookie, Darling. I made them this morning. Coconut, chocolate chip!" Esme offered Amanda and held out a plate of neatly piled cookies in front of the little girl. She smiled proudly at Amanda.

"I hate coconut," Amanda said bluntly without moving. Esme straightened up and pulled the plate back, discouraged. Carlisle didn't like Amanda's answer.

"No, thank you, would have sufficed, Dear," he corrected Amanda. She shrunk in her chair a bit and crossed her arms, feeling sheepish. He didn't harp on it. Esme put the cookies away and took off her apron in the kitchen. Carlisle excused himself to regurgitate the upset of food in his stomach behind a bush in the yard. It was not pleasant, but he took the heat for his family that night.

On his way back inside, Alice stopped him and informed him that Amanda had not been honest with him today. She had seen that Amanda was going to have detention the next day to finish the homework she said she didn't have. Alice had not meant to rat Amanda how, but she was trying to detour the detention Amanda was going to be given. Carlisle thanked Alice for the inside information and composed himself to confront Amanda.

Amanda finished poking around at the carrots on her plate. Esme excused her after a while when it became apparent Amanda was not going to eat her vegetables.

"Amanda?" Carlisle questioned, coming back to the kitchen from his trip outside. She spun around in her chair, grabbing the top spindle of the wood back and faced him. "I know you told me you don't have any homework to finish up for tomorrow, but I am going to ask you again in case something slipped your mind,"

Amanda didn't answer. She kept a straight face and waited.

"Do you have anything that needs work on before you go to class tomorrow?" Carlisle phrased his words into a question to make her denial a lot harder. Amanda surprised him by shaking her head without any sign of guilt that she was lying. "Amanda, I am going to give you one more chance to think about this to make sure you are not forgetting anything. Are you sure you have no homework to work on this evening?"

"I'm sure," Amanda lied. Carlisle sighed, but Amanda didn't budge. She didn't see how there was any way for him to know if she had homework or not. He didn't know her teacher and he didn't know she had a notebook that needed to be signed by Elizabeth every night. Carlisle left the room and Amanda assumed the interrogation was over. A few minutes later, with Alice's help of course, he was back with her notebook in hand. He put it down on the table in front of Amanda gently. She looked at it for a moment without blinking. Carlisle waited for as long as it took for Amanda to respond in some way.

"I'll help you with your math homework, Mandi," Alice offered kindly, trying to ease the tension and offer the child an out. Amanda scowled at her notebook, not moving. Carlisle bent down to her level, which made her burn with anger inside. She did not want to talk to the doctor now.

"Alice has been kind enough to offer you her assistance," he repeated. Amanda didn't answer. She exhaled noisily in frustration. "I do not like to be lied to. I suggest you finish your homework and then get yourself to bed. It is getting late," Carlisle stood up again and calmly walked away from her, leaving Alice to step in. Esme watched the whole confrontation take place, but she stood back to let her husband deal with the upset child. He knew Amanda better and Esme didn't want to step on anyone's toes.

Alice babbled away to try to cheer up Amanda as if the whole thing had not happened. She opened the notebook to the half completed page of math problems and chirped encouraging words to motivate Amanda. It didn't work. Amanda let her rage get the better of her and she acted out by unexpectedly brushing her booklet off the table in a quick sweep. It flew off and flapped on the floor.

There was silence. Alice went to pick it up. Amanda could feel all eyes on her and she dropped her head into her folded arms on the table and began to cry. She was so overwhelmed and all the pent up emotions from the last few days suddenly released themselves from her outburst. Alice touched Amanda's shoulder to comfort, but Amanda violently pulled away, keeping her head down buried in her arms.

"She is ashamed..." Jasper whispered under his breath to explain to his family. Amanda could not hear this private conversation. He continued, " ...frustrated, scared, hurt, sad, exhausted, and very angry!"

Carlisle nodded at his son's assessment. He let Amanda cry until she was silent and then Jasper put her to sleep with ease and took her up to bed. There was no point in pushing the child any further that night. She did not know how to control her temper and now was not the time to teach her a lesson. She had school in the morning.

* * *

**Please leave a Review. **


	16. Sick

**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Sixteen  
**

|Sick|

The morning started out just as horribly as the night had ended for Amanda. She had fallen to sleep crying and she woke up in tears just the same. She had been dreaming of the last night she saw her mother and the morning after when she had found her dead. It was not a very good way to start her day. Since the plane crash and seeing Elizabeth's grief stricken face, Amanda had been resurrecting some of her own memories of death.

Amanda sat up and wiped the wet, sticky tears from her face. She had not been making any noise at all, but the salt tears drying on her face had tickled her and woken her up. She felt awful. Her head felt heavy and her body was sore from sleeping in a tight, curled up ball.

"Amanda!" Esme called, followed by three light knocks on the bedroom door. Amanda had not heard anyone approach so the sound startled her. She kept quiet as Esme opened the door and poked her head inside. "Good morning, Dear. It is time to get up. The kids are almost ready to leave for school. They will drop you off on the way,"

"Okay," Amanda said in her dainty, childlike voice. Esme smiled and left Amanda to get ready. She, nor the others, held any grudge with the child for her outburst the previous night. It had long been forgotten. Amanda sighed and crawled out of bed. She did not want to go to school. Mondays were the back into that long schedule of grueling focus was particularly difficult after a weekend.

She moped along and washed her face, brushed her teeth, and got herself dressed. She let her hair hang down, still tangled from sleeping on it. Amanda tucked some behind her ears and grabbed her backpack with her notebook already inside, courteously of Alice.

Amanda made her way to the kitchen where Esme had prepared some toast for her and poured her a glass of milk. Amanda was in no mood to make requests or to be fussy. She just wanted to get on with the day with as little talking as possible. Esme sensed her mood and we very gentle with her and allowed her some space.

Amanda was wondering if the family was mad at her for lying to them yesterday about her homework. She vaguely recalled throwing her notebook on the floor and refusing to do it once she had been caught lying to Dr Cullen. Amanda was confused about how he even caught her at the lie. She also thought it was strange how Alice seemed to know it was math homework before the notebook had even been opened. All these thoughts and others began to clump in Amanda's mind about the mysterious Cullen family. She didn't know it yet, but she was right to suspect them of something supernatural.

"Come on, Mandi…we are leaving now. Rosalie is having a fit out in the car. She thinks we will be late!" Alice announced in her high, pleasant sounding voice. Amanda whipped her head around to find the pixie vampire right behind her. Amanda sighed and dropped her toast, only one bite taken out of it. She had been dragging all morning.

"Oh dear, you didn't get to finish your breakfast," Esme cooed. Amanda shrugged.

"I'm not that hungry anyways," she replied. Esme hummed and hurried to the counter and grabbed a brown paper bag filled with food she had prepared for Amanda to take to school. She came back and zipped it into Amanda's knapsack.

"You have plenty of food in your bag if you get hungry later," she told the little girl and then without thinking, she took Amanda's head in her hands and planted a soft kiss on the top. Amanda's eyes widened in shock and she froze. She hardly knew Esme and she was surprised by her affection. Alice took Amanda by the hand before anyone had time to react. Esme watched after them as they left.

Emmet drove like a maniac towards the school. Amanda felt queasy as the Jeep parked outside the elementary with a jerk. She went flying forward in her seat, the belt caught her and then she slammed back again. Alice smiled at her, undid her buckle, opened the car door and hopped down.

The Jeep was so huge that Amanda needed to be lifted to the ground by Jasper passing her to Alice. Then, to Amanda's surprise, Alice leaped back in without showing an ounce of strain doing so.

"Have a good day, Mandi!" Alice chirped before closing the door of the Jeep. "We will be here after school to pick you up again!"

Amanda waved unenthusiastically back at Alice, who appeared to be happy on any day of the week, no matter what time it was. Amanda stumbled her way towards the front doors of the school. The bell rang as she entered and she moaned inside. _'Late again. This is going to be a bad day,'_ she decided.

*

*

*

Carlisle had a full day ahead of him. Mondays always seemed to be busy at the clinic. And without Elizabeth's help, he was taking calls and organizing the patient files on his own. He had a greater appreciation for his assistant now. Elizabeth was one of the best he had ever had.

The phone rang at the front desk and he picked it up, putting down a stack of folders he had just organized. The call display read 'Roth' on it.

"Hello, this is Dr Cullen speaking," he answered.

"Carlisle!" Elizabeth said with a touch of life in her voice. She had not realized how much she missed her friend until she heard his voice.

"Elizabeth. How are you?" he asked.

"Oh, well…I am doing better, thank you," she answered as honestly as she could. In truth, she was not doing very well. There was no other way to react when your husband is suddenly, tragically, killed. She was calling to check in.

"I suppose that was not a great question on my part. I am sorry," Carlisle apologized.

"Oh no, don't worry. I …"Elizabeth chocked on her words, "I am calling to check in. How is Amanda? She is not giving you a hard time, I hope?"

"Amanda is doing well. I didn't get the chance to speak with her this morning. She was not up yet when I was leaving for work. She has been having some trouble sleeping," Carlisle admitted. He left out the part about her hissy fit last night.

"Poor dear. I feel so horrible about how she last saw me. I should have composed myself better," Elizabeth blamed herself.

"You are amazing strong, Liz. You are grieving. Amanda knows that," he told her comfortingly.

"I am just so grateful to you, Carlisle. I don't know how I am going to repay you for taking care of me and now Amanda," Elizabeth cried.

"It is the least I could do for you, Liz. We don't mind at all," Carlisle told his friend. He only wanted her to be happy again. One day soon, hopefully, he thought.

"Amanda can be a handful. You pass on my gratitude to Esme as well, won't you?" Elizabeth asked of him.

"Of course, but it really not a hardship. We are enjoying having her. Esme is over the moon to have a child in the house again," he admitted. "She has been baking up a storm, trying to please Amanda. We could open a bakery,"

Elizabeth laughed lightly. "Thank you, Carlisle," she told him again.

"You are welcome, Liz. I don't want you to worry about a thing. We will take care of Amanda until you come home,"

"Oh, right! Yes!" Elizabeth piped up when he reminded her, "I was calling to tell you about that as well. The funeral is taking longer to prepare for than we had planned. It will not be until Thursday. There are two memorials. One right after the funeral for family only and the other is on Saturday for the public. I am going to call the airport after this and book a flight home after wards. I hope that is all right. It is a lot longer than I anticipated this trip to take,"

"You may take a long as you need, Liz. We are here for you," Carlisle repeated. She sighed and relaxed, taking his words to heart.

"I really appreciate it," she sighed again. It was hard for her to put into words how she was feeling. She was in such shock still she really was not acting like herself.

"You take good care of yourself, Liz. Call me anytime if you need to," Carlisle told her. He heard someone calling to Elizabeth on her end. She had to go.

"Thank you, Carlisle. Please tell Amanda that I am thinking of her and that I will be home on the weekend,"

"I will tell her," Carlisle agreed.

"Goodbye," Elizabeth whispered, sorry to lose touch with her best friend. Carlisle had a way of making her feel at ease. He was so stable and so kind. Without him she would not have been able to make it to Alberta. She would probably still be on the kitchen floor, curled up in a ball.

"Goodbye for now, Liz," Carlisle replied and he hung up the phone. There was a waiting room full of patients waiting for him. Once of which was Mrs Fromms. Carlisle took a calming breath and picked up the first patient's file. It was going to be a long day.

*

*

*

It was midday at the high school. Alice and Jasper met up with Rosalie and Emmet in the hallway between classes. Alice had some news on Amanda she wanted to share with the others.

"Amanda is sick," Alice announced as they all came together in front of Rosalie's locker. Jasper already knew. Emmet thought about the words and didn't speak. Rosalie frowned and looked down at her little, elfin sister as she put her books away from her last class.

"Sick?" she questioned. Alice nodded and bit her lip. She had seen Amanda's future and it was a high fever and a lot of bed rest.

"She is going to need us. Her teacher is going to be rather harsh with her this afternoon. Amanda won't have the strength to speak up for herself," Alice shared. She could see that Amanda's teacher, Mrs Brightman, was an impatient lady and was not going to realize that Amanda's lack of focus in class today was because she was not feeling well.

"Oh, well…do we need to go get her now?" Rosalie asked, hoping to get out of school early. She would love any excuse. Emmet grinned, eager to ditch class as well. Alice bit her lip again and thought. She flashed in and out of a vision and then nodded.

"She has a fever now. If we go, we will have a reason to pull her out," Alice said with certainty.

"We don't all need to go get her," Jasper spoke up. "It is not going to fly. Only one or two of us should go,"

"Well, me and you, then," Alice said quickly, tugging on Jasper's arm. Rosalie put her hand down on her little sister's shoulder to stop her.

"Why you?" she asked loudly.

"I thought of it! Without me we would not know she is sick!" Alice exclaimed. She folded her arms across her chest and puffed it out a bit trying to look bigger next to her other siblings.

"Well, we all know now and I am the one who has studied medicine more in depth. I am better apt to care for Amanda if she is ill," Rosalie countered. Emmet nodded once.

"Word!" he blurted out. No one acknowledged him.

"You know....she is right," Jasper sided with Rosalie. Alice's mouth fell open. She was going to protest, but Jasper continued. "She will take the best care of Amanda until Carlisle is home from work. And you know that Mom will be horribly upset with us if we all leave school midday. I say that only Rosalie goes to pick up Amanda,"

"Hey! If she goes, I wanna go with her," Emmet whined in a deep voice. Rosalie shook her head, no.

"I think Jasper is right. It will work best if it is just me that leaves to pick her up. Mom and Dad will allow that and it is my turn to ditch," Rosalie said sharply, "Besides, Alice. You have a French Midterm to get to. In one minute!"

"Oh, fine!" Alice finally agreed. She realized that getting an F on her French midterm would upset both her parents. Jasper also had this exam today so he thought their plan of letting Rosalie take care of Amanda was the best. Emmet wanted to go too, but Rosalie insisted he stick it out at school. It would be hard enough to be alone with the little girl, let alone have Emmet by her side making silly comments.

"I will call Dad and let him know what is going on," Jasper said responsibly. Rosalie nodded and smiled. Alice was still pouting that she didn't get to execute on her vision. She was the one who saw Amanda was sick. She wanted to be the one to help her. Alice bit her tongue and didn't argue anymore because Jasper thought this was the best plan.

"Well, then…let's get a move on!" Rosalie huffed, thrilled by the idea of having a good reason to miss class for once. "I'm taking the Jeep!"

"But-" Alice began to protest.

"You'll have to walk. It is not raining!" Rosalie said as she hurried out of sight. The crowd in the hallway began to dissipate as students headed to class. The bell was about to ring. Alice scowled and took Jasper's hand to go to French class. Emmet hurried off to his History class.

*

*

*

"Good Heavens, Amanda! You still have not completed this mornings reading assignment?" Mrs Brightman asked shrilly in front of the entire fourth grade class. It was after lunch and the day was dragging on for Amanda. She had not been able to concentrate on anything her teacher had to say today.

This morning she had gotten in trouble for being late for class and then nearly falling asleep on her desk when Mrs Brightman went over the schedule for the day. Amanda had failed the morning math quiz, gotten a detention for her unfinished homework assignment, and had to stay in for recess to finish it. Even then, she did not get it completed.

Before lunch period she had tried to read the short story that had been handed out so she could answer the questions at the end, but she could hardly see the page. Her head was fuzzy and full feeling and her eyes were tired. Amanda tried to tell Mrs Brightman she wasn't feeling well, but the impatient teacher didn't give her a chance to speak.

"Well, you will just have to do it after school then! No matter how long it takes you," Mrs Brightman scolded harshly.

Amanda's head ached and she felt like crying, but she didn't want her classmates to stare at her anymore than they already were for getting in trouble. She looked down at her paper again and tried her best to read the story. This would be her 6th time going through it. The words still didn't make meaning in her fevered mind.

Amanda soon gave up and rested her head down on the cool desk. It soothed the dull pain in her head. All of a sudden there was a loud smack on her desk that sent Amanda lurching up. Mrs Brightman had slapped part of the desk with her meter stick. Amanda cringed away from it, not certain if she was meant as the target.

Rosalie burst into the room; having heard this and watched the scene unfold through the window in the classroom door. The whole class turned to watch the modelesque blonde that had just interrupted their study. Mrs Brightman was stunned as well. She still held the stick over Amanda's head!

"How dare you berate a child in front of her peers in that violent manner?" Rosalie's inquired rhetorically, her temper flaring. The teacher was at a loss for words. She had seen Rosalie Cullen before from a distance, but up close she was intimidated by her beauty and by her accusations.

"I…she needs to be disciplined," Mrs Brightman stuttered, "She has been slacking in her assignments all day,"

"And you think by frightening her, she will suddenly perk up and do what you want?" Rosalie inquired hastily, but didn't leave time for the teacher to respond. "Look at her! She is clearly not well,"

Amanda was flushed as it was, but she felt her cheeks grow warmer from the attention she was getting. All eyes were on her, Rosalie, and the teacher.

"Well…I…I…" Mrs Brightman continued to stutter, putting the meter stick down on another student's desk. Rosalie stepped up beside Amanda and crouched down to her level.

"She is flushed, no doubt running a fever, and utterly exhausted. You haven't even thought to ask her how she is feeling?" Rosalie spoke out loud in rant, but not directly at the teacher. Amanda was silent and still. She was surprised to have Rosalie in her classroom coming to her rescue. She was not sure what that was about.

"I didn't…I didn't realize…she never said anything," Mrs Brightman excused. Rosalie placed her hand on Amanda's forehead and sighed. Amanda noticed how Rosalie's hand was so much colder feeling than she had expected, in contrast to her hot skin.

"She is a child. You are the adult!" Rosalie scolded, standing and taking Amanda by the hand. She stood up beside Rosalie and watched, wide eyed, as her teacher blushed with embarrassment. Amanda was not feeling well enough to enjoy this moment. She could hardly stand up straight from the shock of it all.

"Go get your things, Amanda. I am taking you home," Rosalie told her. Amanda obeyed and went to her cubby and took her backpack off the hook. Someone in the class snickered. It was Stacy Peterson. Amanda had told Alice all about her and, in turn, Alice had relayed the gossip to Rosalie.

"I don't know what you are laughing about, Miss Stacey Peterson, but I don't like mean girls!" Amanda heard Rosalie say. She swiveled around to see the Rosalie talking down to Stacy. "Amanda is a good friend of mine and if I hear of you giving her a hard time I will make it my business to alert your parents of your cruel, sociopathic behavior,"

Roaslie paused for a short moment and then added, "Seeing as so much is missed under the unwatchful eyes of this establishment,"

Amanda could not believe the words she was hearing. Rosalie was not only standing up for her, she was reprimanding Mrs Brightman and Stacy in one sentence. Amanda whipped around to see Stacy slouching in her desk, frowning. Amanda was amazed. Stacey looked horrified. And her teacher looked appalled, but too aghast to argue are speak back.

"Come along, Amanda. Let's get the Hell out of here," Rosalie snapped and turned her back on the classroom of shocked students and teacher. Amanda felt her hand being taken and then she followed the pull and kept up with Rosalie, who hurried her down the school hallway and out the front doors.

Amanda wondered how Rosalie knew to come and get her from school. _'How did she know I was sick?'_ Amanda questioned. She had already noticed how perceptive Alice was and how that every time she was in trouble or needed help, one of the Cullen's magically appeared. She was feeling too sick to harp on today's miracle. She was just happy that Rosalie had come to save her day.

They got to the humongous vehicle and Rosalie lifted Amanda into the Jeep and strapped the little girl in snugly. Then she went around to the driver's side and got in. Before she started the engine she turned to Amanda.

"I think it is best if we do not tell my parents about my outburst in there," Rosalie told Amanda, "Can you keep a secret?"

"Uh huh," Amanda agreed and nodded in sync with her words, happy to play along. Rosalie sighed and smiled kindly at Amanda. The little girl returned the gesture with a weak, but genuine smile.

"Thank you," Rosalie said softly, "Now, let's get you home and into bed,"

*

*

*

Hours later, Amanda woke from a short nap. She was twisted in her frilly, lavender colored nightgown and it had woken her up. Rosalie had gotten her undressed and into pajamas the moment they had arrived home. Esme had brought up three different drinks for Amanda because Rosalie had told her that she needed to drink a lot of fluids to keep her body hydrated.

Amanda sat up and rubbed her eyes. They were still sore and her head pounded. She could hear more voices in the house now. It was after school and the Cullen kids were home. Amanda felt a bit thirsty. She reached out to the nightstand and took the water glass in her hand to take a sip. It tasted awful, so she put it back down.

"It was my turn, Alice! Let it go!" Rosalie's voice trailed from the hallway, under the door, and into the bedroom Amanda was in.

"Whatever. She's awake. I want to check on her!" Alice's high voice demanded. Amanda found it odd that they knew she was awake. She had not made a sound. The door opened.

"Hey!" Rosalie whispered softly, and turned on the light. Amanda flinched. It was too bright. The two vampire sister's came in and sat on the end of her bed.

"Are you in trouble?" Amanda asked Rosalie, curious to why she had heard arguments when she woke up.

"No, not at all. It is our secret, remember?" Rosalie reminded her. Alice perked up. She was unaware of Rosalie's rant in Amanda's classroom because Rosalie had not planned on it.

"What secret?" Alice asked curiously. Rosalie put her index finger to her luscious, full lips. Amanda smiled faintly and a brief giggle escaped from her mouth. Alice glared at Rosalie.

"Fine. Be that way! I don't want to know anyway!"

"Good! Amanda and I will never tell!" Rosalie announced, enjoying herself very much. Amanda smiled again. She found Alice and Rosalie's bickering to be amusing. She had always wanted a sister of her own. It looked like fun.

"Esme wants to know what you would like to eat, Mandi," Alice changed the topic.

"I'm not hungry," Amanda replied. Alice frowned, knowing that Esme was bustling away in the kitchen trying to find something for Amanda to eat since she had not had breakfast and the bag lunch she had packed had gone untouched.

"It is fine if she doesn't want to eat, Alice," Rosalie said, giving the little girl an approving smile. Amanda was still amazed by Rosalie's actions today. Not only did she come to save her from a hellish day at school, she gave her teacher and Stacy a talking to! Amanda felt closer to Rosalie now and was beginning to like her more.

Amanda sighed and leaned back on her pillow, sore and tired. Rosalie came and sat next to her and felt her forehead again. She looked to Alice and without words Alice skipped out of the room.

"Dad should be home any minute, Amanda, but would it be okay if I took your temperature while we wait for him?"

Amanda nodded. Alice appeared again by her side and handed a thermometer to her sister. Rosalie then held it out in front of the child's mouth and Amanda opened and let it fit under her tongue and then closed her lips tightly to hold it in place. Rosalie smiled and sat patiently.

"Mom went to the store and bought the medicine Dad told her to get," Alice announced. Rosalie nodded and then faced Amanda.

"Is your head still hurting?" she asked, brushing Amanda's hair behind her ears to get it off her face. Amanda nodded, but kept her mouth taught so she would not lose the thermometer. Rosalie was sympathetic even though she had no recollection of what a headache would feel like. "The medicine will help," she reassured. Amanda made a face, not liking what she was hearing.

"I'll go get it!" Alice chirped and ran out of the room gracefully, but so fast Amanda did a double take.

Rosalie reached and took the thermometer from Amanda's mouth and held it up to read the mercury. It was an older version, one of Carlisle's spares he kept in his study. Amanda didn't notice it was from the late 1800's. She would not think to ask questions about that sort of thing.

"Here you go!" Alice sang, racing back into the bedroom with a bottle of red liquid Tylenol in her hand and a spoon in the other. Amanda recognized the label and shook her head.

"I don't want any," she rebuffed quietly, but with no lenience in her tone. Alice slumped her shoulders as Rosalie took the medicine from her hands.

"It will help," Rosalie insisted, unscrewing the lid. Amanda shook her head and leaned away defiantly. Alice shrugged.

"She's not going to take it, Rose," Alice said. Rosalie sighed and put the lid back on to bottle. She had no idea why Amanda was being difficult, but she knew better then to argue with Alice. She wasn't going to fight with Amanda. She would let Carlisle handle it when he got home. Amanda's fever was moderate, but she didn't need the medicine unless it was too high or she was feeling too much discomfort.

"That's fine, Amanda, but you do have to drink some more water or juice," she stated strongly, picking up both glasses from the night stand to give Amanda some choice. Amanda pouted, but took the warm apple juice and took a few sips. It appeased Rosalie.

Alice left the room.

"Would you like me to read to you?" Rosalie asked Amanda. The girl nodded her head. Rosalie pulled 'Little Women' off the bookshelf and then sat close to Amanda to read to her. It only took a few pages, for Amanda to get comfortable with Rosalie sitting so close. She liked the feeling of being read to. She got closer and closer to the blonde vampire, until she was leaning her head on Rosalie's arm.

"Oh, I think Dad's home!" Rosalie suddenly deviated from the lines in the book. Amanda thought she was reading for a second, until Rosalie shifted and got up, leaving her to slouch back on her big white pillow. Rosalie took a soft aqua colored throw blanket and covered Amanda up to her waist and tucked in the edges around her legs. Rosalie grinned pleasantly and said, "I will read more to you later if you are feeling up to it, okay?"

"Okay," Amanda agreed, sorry to see her new friend go. Rosalie floated out of the room, leaving the door slightly ajar. Amanda tried to make out the words spoken in the hallway, but her human ears were not advanced enough. Her head ached so she slouched back deeper into the pillow and wiggled her legs free from the tight tuck in Rosalie had given her.

*

*

*

Outside in the hallway, Rosalie ran into her father on his way up to check on Amanda.

"How is she?" he asked, "Alice says she has a fever,"

"Yes. It looks like it is the start of a cold virus. She doesn't sound congested at all, though," Rosalie told her father. He nodded thoughtfully as he listened. She then gave him a run down of Amanda's afternoon, excluding the part when she gave Amanda's class quite the show.

"She was exhausted when I got her home so she had a little sleep. She just woke up about twenty minutes ago and I took her temperature. It was one hundred and two degrees. She is not wanting anything to eat, but has been drinking some water and some juice. Her only complaint is that her head hurts, but she refuses to take the Tylenol you suggested," Rosalie explained.

"Alright," Carlisle accepted this run through and then he smile, "Thank you, Honey," He gave Rosalie a kiss on the forehead and she beamed with pride to have gained his approval. She turned and left without a word, practically skipping like Alice would have. Carlisle continued on down the hallway to see Amanda.

He entered quietly, in case she was sleeping, but Amanda turned to see who was there. Her frown deepened when she saw it was the doctor. Even though he gave her a friendly grin as he approached her, she continued to sulk. Amanda was not happy to see him. He leaned over her and cupped her forehead with is hand. She was quite warm. Warmer than usual to his icy touch.

Amanda twitched and moved away from his hand. He retracted it away and then sat down beside her.

"Your hands are always so cold!" Amanda complained. It was unreasonable to say this to Dr Cullen when she knew that Alice and Rosalie's hands were always just as cool to the touch. This morning as well, when Esme kissed her, Amanda had noticed how unnaturally cool Mrs Cullen was.

Carlisle chuckled. "I am sorry. I don't have very good blood circulation," he said honestly. The joke went over Amanda's head. She frowned. Carlisle looked to the nightstand and saw the medicine sitting there and asked, "How are you feeling, Sweetheart?"

Amanda shrugged and didn't answer. Carlisle lifted his black bag up and placed it open on the bed beside her. Her eyes peeked inside, curiously. "Rosalie tells me that you are not hurting anywhere except your head, is that correct?" he asked her. Amanda nodded a very tiny bit. He held his hand up to her neck and paused to make she sure was excepting of him to touch her. When she didn't move away he continued. He proceeded to feel the lymph nodes in her neck, under her jaw. She shivered at his touch. Her glands were swollen, but only slightly.

"How about your throat? Does it feel sore at all?" he asked, pulling an otoscope from his bag and flicked on its light. Amanda shook her head to his questions. He held a tongue depressor in the opposite hand and had Amanda open wide for him to take a look inside her mouth. Her throat looked fine. Carlisle smiled reassuringly and then put a clean earpiece on the end of the tool. He flicked the light to a higher setting and gently turned Amanda's head so he could take a look inside her ear. She let him without complaint.

"Good, now the other one," he said and Amanda turned her head so he could check her other ear. When he was done he pulled back and smiled. He turned off the otoscope and placed it back in his bag. Amanda watched him to see what he was going to do next. Carlisle noticed her eyeing his stethoscope and although he could hear her clear breaths and steady heartbeat, albeit a little fast, fairly well, he decided he'd better follow through with her expectations of him.

"Take a couple of deep breathes for me, Amanda," he instructed and he put the earpieces in his ears and the bell to her chest. The sound of her fast beating heart and the air whooshing in and then out of her lungs was so vividly enhanced Carlisle could not have missed an ailment in her chest if there was one to find. Satisfied, he took off his stethoscope and put it away and then closed his bag.

"One more quick check, Sweetie, and then I will leave you alone," he told Amanda, who was looking absolutely tormented to have him so near. She had not stopped scowling for one minute of the exam. Carlisle gently palpitated her abdomen to make sure that there was no source of infection in there that was causing her fever. He wanted to rule out everything to be certain it was just a common cold causing her elevated temperature. When he asked her if anything hurt when he pressed down Amanda shook her head, no.

"All done," Carlisle concluded. He felt her forehead one last time. She was warmer than he liked, but he knew that the fever was her body's way to fight off the illness. He picked up the red bottle of liquid acetaminophen. Amanda tensed up at the sight. Carlisle wondered why she was responding this way.

"I think you would feel a lot better if you had a bit of this, Amanda," he told her sincerely, in his soothing voice that always worked on his adult patients when he needed to persuade them to see reason about a diagnosis. Amanda was stubborn. She shook her head.

"I don't want any!" She voiced her wishes loudly. Carlisle was not going to force her. The medicine would not make her any better, only help to control her temperature and ease her headache momentarily.

"Alright, Amanda. It is up to you, then. Why don't you lay your head back and take another nap?" he suggested, conceding to Amanda's protest. He placed the bottle on the nightstand again and stood up with his bag to leave her to get some rest. Amanda didn't argue. After Carlisle left the room she shut her eyes and fell back to sleep.

It was not an easy slumber. Amanda's temperature grew as night fell and she tossed and turned in her bed. Nightmares filled her subconscious and she woke with a piercing scream that sent shivers down the spine of every member of the Cullen family.

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**Review Please!**


	17. Nightmares Really Do Come True

**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Seventeen  
**

|Nightmares Really Do Come True|

"Mom?" Amanda asked. She peeked into her mother's bedroom late one evening. Amy Peppel had come home late from a boyfriend's house and had stormed to her bedroom and not said a word to her seven-year-old daughter.

Amy's boyfriend had just broken up with her and left her feeling like a piece of shit! She was not thinking about anyone but herself as she drank down slug after slug of rye whiskey. She was too intoxicated to feel the burn anymore. She was angry, lonely, and hurt that yet another person had turned their back on her.

This was the eighth boyfriend Amy had gone through in six years. Just like everyone else in Amy's life, he up and took off without so much as a motive behind his actions. This, most recent, fellow was moving to Toronto to give his Ex-girlfriend another shot. Amy blamed herself. She was the common denominator in all her failed relationships after all.

Amy's mother had left her, her father went to prison, her grandparents was long gone and under tombstones. Amanda was the only thing that kept her living this long, but now, she forgot to think about how Amanda was feeling. Amy felt lost and alone in her self-pity.

Tonight, Amy was too far-gone to think about her actions and how by escaping her pain, she would be inflicted years of pain on Amanda. It was becoming a cycle of depression, remorse, anger and eventually…suicide. The most selfish act one could commit, so Amy had always thought. She had never been the same since the day she was found alive in the forest to find out her own mother, in grief, had taken her life before she was returned home.

That is why now, in the pit of despair Amy could not seem to climb her way out of, she decided to end her life. She took a sloppy sit on the side of her bed and picked up a bottle of Extra Strength Tylenol and shook it drunkenly. The bottle of whiskey in her other hand shook too and a bit spilled out over her lap. Amy didn't notice.

"Mom?" Amanda asked again, too scared to come inside, but wondering what her mother was up to. She watched her mother pick up the pills and noted the red label and the big 'T' in the name. Her mom always had this medicine on her night stand for when she had a headache. Amanda knew better than to touch anything that was medicine.

"Jesus Christ, Amanda! Leave me alone and get your ass to bed!" Amy cursed, without looking at the door. If she had, she would have seen a very frightened little girl and perhaps not gone through with her next action. Amy popped the lid of the pill bottle and it fell to the floor. Amanda shuffled and gasped when he mom spilled a few, white pills on the carpet next to the bed.

"NOW!" Amy screamed, without looking at the door. Amanda fell back and then scurried to her feet and ran to her room. She crawled under her blankets and hid, holding her hands over her ears tightly, not wanting to hear her mother's drunken stupor anymore. It scared her when her mom was drinking.

Amanda shut her eyes and when she opened them it was morning. She waited in bed for a while. She heard silence from the rest of the house.

Eventually, her stomach was aching from hunger so much she needed to get up to fill it with something. Amanda crept to the fridge in the kitchen and found there was nothing to eat. There was one raw egg on a shelf and some moldy lettuce in a bag and a bottle of ketchup. She shut the door and got a glass from the sink and rinsed it out the best she could and filled it with water.

The liquid was not nourishment, by any means, but it temporarily tricked her body into thinking she had eaten. She gulped down two full glasses and put the glass back on top the heaping pile of dirty dishes in the sink. There were fruit flies buzzing around over the counters covered in food, plates, garbage and other substances that Amanda didn't want to go near.

She rounded the counter and slowly, carefully walked back towards her room. On the way, she saw her mother's bedroom door was still ajar, just how she had left it last night. Amanda didn't want to speak, fearful of upsetting her mother. Amy was just as cranky the morning after a drinking binge as she was when she was drunk.

Amanda's curiosity was too great for her to ignore. She slinked up to the door and tried, without touching it, to peer inside. She could not see her mother anywhere. Amanda wondered if her mother had gotten up early and left the house. It would not have been unusual for Amy to leave Amanda unattended. Her parenting skills were dismal. Amy hardly remembered how her own mother had loved her.

The little girl decided to push the door open slowly with one finger rather than to speak out loud. Amanda knew from experience that it was never a good idea to wake her mother if she was hung-over.

The door inched open and Amanda stuck her head in and scoped the room, keeping her lips pressed tightly together. Her mother was nowhere in sight. The bed was unmade, looking slept in, but it was hard to tell because Amy never made her bed in the morning. Amanda stepped inside the room. It reeked of whiskey.

"Mom?" she peeped, trying not to be too loud. She stepped toward the bed, feeling her stomach twist in a knot. It was not hunger pangs this time.

"AAAAAaaaaaa!" Amanda screamed involuntarily as she spotted her mother's body lying on the floor on the right side of the bed. She fell back and then crawled to the corner of the room and backed herself in like a scared animal would. She tried not to look, but she stared ahead in shock at her mother's lifeless body.

Amy's mouth hung open and her eyes were fixed straight ahead, glossed over in stillness. There was white foamed vomit on the carpet beside her and she was as white as a ghost.

Amanda could not move. She was scared that her mother was going to jump out at her like the dead bodies on horror movies often did. She began to cry. Not a soft cry, Amanda began to wail! The terror built and she began to scream again. She closed her eyes, covered her ears and screamed over and over again until the neighbors overheard and came to see what the matter was.

It was too late. Amy was dead.

*

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"Oh dear Heavens!" Esme exclaimed, standing from her seat in front of her easel in the living room downstairs. She held her hand over her heart as if it had began beating again. She was not the only one who jerked alert to the sound she had just heard.

Alice, Carlisle, and Rosalie all froze and looked up towards the ceiling. Amanda had just let out a piercing scream that chilled each one to the bone. They didn't react right away. They waited a second or so and when another ear splitting screech came echoing through the house, they all ran to the little girl's aid.

The two boys were out hunting so the were missing all the action. When the four vampires entered Amanda's room, she was screaming again and thrashing around under her blankets. Carlisle stopped his wife from touching the sleeping child.

"She is not awake. This is some sort of night terror. We need to wake her gently," he warned. The sheen from the moonlight was glistening of Amanda's fevered brow. Her face was pink and she struggled within her nightmare to get back to reality. Carlisle sat on one side of her and Esme on the other. Alice and Rosalie huddled back nervously, horrified at the scene.

"Amanda, Darling? Please wake up. Everything is okay," Esme hushed lightly, trying to place her hand on Amanda's shoulder, but the child was moaning and tossing from one side and then to the other. Carlisle gave an approving nod to his wife for her to continue waking Amanda softly. Amanda screamed again and Esme looked tearful, but she tried to wake the girl again.

"Baby, please…wake up. Wake up," Esme cooed. Amanda twitched violent at Esme's cold hand touching her cheek. Her eyes flew open and she stopped breathing for a second.

Then she screamed again. This time it was directed at Esme.

Amanda was not sure where she was or what was going on, but Esme looked like her dead mother. Cold, white, and flawlessly still, staring back at her with horror written on her pretty face. Amanda was terrified.

"Get away! GET AWAY! Get AWAY!" Amanda cried at the top of her lungs. Esme was stunned at Amanda's reaction her and she stepped back to try to remedy the problem.

Amanda squirmed back on the bed to get as far from Esme as she could. Carlisle caught her before she fell off the edge. Amanda screamed again and lifted her hand back to hit him, but he grabbed hold of it before she could do any harm to herself.

"Amanda. Amanda, calm down, Sweetheart. It was not real. It was a dream," he told her in a firm, calm voice. He held onto her with a solid grip to control her rage. She tried to break free, but she was too weak and after only seconds she gave up trying to pry away from his steel grasp. She sank into him let him hold her. He put his hand to her forehead.

Amanda cringed away from the doctor and whimpered. She caught sight of Esme standing on the side of the room and she panicked again seeing some of her mother's traits in Esme's facial features. Amanda's heart was already speedy, but this new fear was making it dangerously tachycardic.

Alice frowned and whispered lowly that she wished Jasper were there to help put Amanda at ease. Carlisle shook his head as he watched the sick child.

"She's burning up. Her heart rate is too high. We need to get her temperature down," Carlisle announced rationally. He picked Amanda up and carried her swiftly into the bathroom and sat down on the edge of the deep bathtub with her on his lap. Her head was too heavy to hold up so she rested it on his cold, hard chest. Carlisle turned on both the hot and cold taps to a cool, but not too cold temperature. Esme came in dutifully to help him with her, but Amanda winced away in fear.

"Rosalie," Carlisle summoned his daughter into the room, beginning to understand it was his wife that Amanda was scared of. He didn't know the reason behind it, but he wanted to calm Amanda down.

He was a fairly good judge of touch temperature readings and she was hotter than she had been several hours ago. He guessed her fever was reaching one hundred and four degrees now. It was not uncommon in children to have higher temperatures than adult when they were ill, but one hundred and four was getting to be out of control.

Rosalie came right away, wanting to be helpful. Alice followed too and took her mother by the hand.

"Come on, Mom. Dad wants us to make up a fresh bed for Amanda and get some new water and some dry pajamas for her to wear?" Alice told Esme. Carlisle nodded, happy for his daughter's premonition. Esme and Alice left to do what was needed of them.

"That's it, Amanda. Take some deep breaths and try to calm down. You're okay," Carlisle soothed the child. Her heart was beating fast, but not erratically like it had been when she had first woke. He felt it was safe to place her in the cool water with out causing her too much shock.

Amanda noticed the tub filling up and began to protest as Carlisle sat her up to slip off her nightgown. He was fast and efficient. She was now only in her underwear and thin white undershirt. Carlisle saw her hesitation to the water.

"Rosalie, would you take Amanda?" he asked as he handed the child to his daughter's already outreached arms. "You are going to take a short bath Amanda. To cool your body down," Carlisle explained as Rosalie stepped into the tub with Amanda in her arms.

She knew what her father wanted her to do. She didn't even bother to take off any of her expensive clothes. She just sat down, cradling Amanda on her lap.

"No no!!" Amanda cried as some of the water hit her feet that hung over Rosalie's legs. She tried to get up and out of the way of the cool, lukewarm water that felt like ice on her hot skin, but she couldn't escape. Amanda clawed at Rosalie to let her go and gave the pretty blonde teen a pleading look.

"It is just for a few minutes, Amanda. You are very warm right now, we are going to rinse you down with some water and then you can come out of the tub. Just relax," Rosalie explained. Amanda frowned and looked like she was about to cry. She didn't fight anymore. She knew she could not win.

Carlisle and Rosalie both took face cloths in hand and took turns soaking them with bath water and wringing them over Amanda's fevered skin. She whimpered softly and clung tighter to Rosalie, trying not to make a fuss. A few tears fell, making both Carlisle and Rosalie feel awful to see her in discomfort, but this had to be done.

"That's a girl. You are doing so well. Not too much longer," Rosalie cooed lovingly into Amanda's ear and she dabbed the cool cloth around Amanda's neck and then face to wipe away the tears. Carlisle saw how willingly Amanda obeyed his daughter so he let Rosalie lead.

They continued to bath her in the cool water for several more minutes and then took her out and wrapped her in a towel. Amanda sniffled and wiped her face on the fluffy, white bath sheet and snuggled tighter to Rosalie as Carlisle came and slipped a thermometer under her arm to get a more accurate reading of her present temperature.

It was back down to one hundred and two degrees and he was satisfied with that for now, but he wanted to give her some fever reducing medicine to lower her temperature even more so she would be able to get a better rest. He left to talk to Esme for a moment, to ease her worry and to let Alice dress Amanda so Rosalie could change into dry clothes as well. Amanda was a lot calmer now after the cold bath. She was actually quite docile in the moment.

*

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*

After Amanda was dried off and in some fresh pajamas and Rosalie was in a dry set of clothing as well, she and Carlisle met up in the bedroom to put the little girl back to bed.

"Amanda, I want you too take a sip of this for me. Open up, please," Carlisle insisted, holding a spoonful of red, liquid Tylenol on a spoon out for Amanda to take. She burrowed her head into Rosalie's side. It hurt her head when she slammed it against Rosalie upper arm. She grimaced and looked up at Rosalie in wonder.

"It is not a request, Honey. You need to take this now," Carlisle said patiently, lifting Amanda's chin and face towards him gently. He put the spoon out for her to take, but she scowled and her arm came up and hit the spoon away, spilling red syrup on Carlisle's blue, silk sweater.

"Amanda!" Rosalie scolded. The disappointed expression on Dr Cullen's face made Amanda cry. She hated to feel weak and to show vulnerabilities, but she was too sick to control her emotions. Her true feelings finally came out.

"I don't want to die!" she wailed and then proceeded to sob quietly, sinking into herself and hanging her head in shame.

"What?" Rosalie blurted out.

"Amanda, Sweetheart. You are not going to die. Why would you think that?" Carlisle asked in a soothing, calm voice. He had already forgiven her for spilling the syrup on him. Amanda continued to cry, but she pointed to the nightstand where the bottle of Tylenol sat. Carlisle looked over and picked it up. "This?" he asked, making Amanda nod and wipe her face with her arm. "Oh, honey…this won't harm you at all. Not one bit. It is medicine to help take away your fever and your headache. It can't hurt you," he told her. Amanda shook her head indignantly.

"Yes it will!" she argued. She was certain of it. Carlisle was not understanding were Amanda's fear of medication was coming from, but he wanted to handle this situation gently to perhaps change her mind. He couldn't justify forcing it down her throat, so he continued to talk reason with the child.

"Amanda, I can promise you that I will not let you die. I would never give you anything that would hurt you that way. Please trust me?"

"No!" she squeaked stubbornly. Carlisle sighed and exchanged a glance with Rosalie. Amanda's cheeks were pink and when he felt her forehead he knew the affects of the cool bath was wearing off and the only other way to lower her temperature was to take the acetaminophen.

"Amanda, please take one sip of the medicine. For me?" Rosalie tried her best to convince the little girl. Amanda's chin quivered, wanting to please Rosalie. "I can assure you that you can not die from taking a few sips,"

"But…that is how my mom died!" Amanda told her honestly.

The truth was out. Carlisle sat up a bit and closed his mouth tight. He understood Amanda's fear now. Amy had died from an overdose. Elizabeth had told him that the day he first met Amanda.

"Oh, Sweetheart," he said soothingly, touching her arm with care. "This is not the same situation as when your mother took this kind of medicine,"

"They were pills, but they were in the same kinda bottle!" Amanda exclaimed tearfully, wanting to say her piece. Carlisle nodded sympathetically and then continued to tactfully ease Amanda's concerns.

"Your mom passed away because she took a lot of medicine, Amanda. Too much. Your body it not designed to take more than eight pills a day, only two every couple of hours," he explained, hoping the child would understand. This was the first time Amanda had ever talked about Amy's death with anyone. She was surprised at how releasing it felt to have this stuff explained to her, even if it was painful to hear.

"She took all the pills!" Amanda shared, "She was drunk. She didn't know the rules!"

Carlisle solemnly nodded and took Amanda's hand. She didn't fight to get away. In fact, Amanda was grateful for him because he was telling her the truth. No one had ever done that before concerning her mother's death.

"Perhaps she didn't know," he agreed mildly, not wanting to upset Amanda any further tonight. She was worn out and needed rest. "Too much medicine mixed with alcohol is a bad thing,"

Rosalie felt choked up inside for the first time in decades. She was not able to shed tears, but the emotion provoked within her was intense and she wished her brother Jasper was in the room to make the feeling go away. It hurt inside her empty chest. It didn't make sense to Rosalie how she could feel this way for the human child.

Amanda listened to Carlisle's honest, oddly comforting words and tried to calm down. Tears continued threatening to fall when she remembered her nightmare.

"I am very sorry about your Mom, Amanda," Rosalie spoke quietly. "But my dad would never give you anything that would hurt you in any way. You can trust him,"

"How about trying just one spoonful? Trust me, please? The medicine will help you fell a whole lot better, Sweetheart," he insisted. Carlisle poured another spoonful of the medicine and held it in front of Amanda. This time Amanda watched it, and then sniffled.

"O-kay," she conceded, letting the doctor come closer to her now with the spoon in hand. She reluctantly opened her mouth and gulped the dosage down. Amanda crunched up her face in disgust at the taste, but Carlisle had already passed her a glass of cool water to wash the medicine down with. Amanda drank nearly the whole glass.

"Good girl," he praised her and smiled lovingly down at her, patting her head with affection. Amanda didn't mind this time. She was tired and her head throbbed. She finished with the water and handed it back to him. Then he got up to leave and told her to get some rest. He left Rosalie to tuck her into bed.

"Goodnight," he told Amanda, feeling that perhaps he had broken through a wall. Or maybe just made a dent in it, but the progress was encouraging. Amanda couldn't rationally dislike him forever.

*

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*

"She was so scared. The poor, little thing," Rosalie said to Emmet who had just returned home from a hunting trip with Jasper. They were being filled in on the night's events. Jasper apologized insistently for leaving when Amanda was so ill.

"I should have been more thoughtful. Obviously, she was sick and could use soothing. I am sorry I took off like that," he told the family. This was not the first time he tried to apologize. Alice squeezed his hand in support.

"You had no way of knowing. Please don't be upset with yourself," Alice begged of him. She didn't like to see him sad. It often made her sad and she was never sure if it was her own feelings or his she was picking up on.

"Amanda is tired and upset. There is little to be done to soothe her. It is probably best she got some of her fears addressed tonight," Carlisle took the stand at the table where they held all their family meetings. Amanda was upstairs, sleeping peacefully now. "It is not healthy for her to repress them,"

"I can't believe she saw her mother do that!" Rosalie exclaimed, stunned at how much Amanda remembered from her mother's suicide. "No child should have to watch someone kill themselves!"

"Her mom killed herself?" Emmet asked bluntly. He realized he was interrupting and sat back down beside Rosalie.

Esme closed her eyes and sank into Carlisle's loving arms. He rubbed her shoulders in comfort, knowing the guilt she felt as well. The circumstances were different in her suicide, of course, but the topic was excruciatingly painful since she had once made the decision to end her own life.

"Yes. That was, with no doubt, a horribly traumatizing event to witness. No one should have to go through that sort of pain. Amanda has been repressing those memories for too long. It was only a matter of time for her to let them come to surface," Carlisle said.

"She was more scared when Mom was there," Alice whispered, embarrassed to speak about Esme this way, but she felt it was important.

"I didn't mean to frighten her…I …"Esme tried to speak, but she had no words to describe how sad she felt for Amanda's reaction to her this evening. Seeing Esme had set Amanda off in a violent, fearful manner.

"Of course not, Love. Amanda was running a high-grade fever and woke up startled. It had nothing to do with you," Carlisle suggested. Alice raised her hand like she did in class when she was to speak.

"Actually, it had everything to do with Mom," Alice said meekly, not wanting to upset her mother. All eyes were on her, waiting patiently for her to explain herself.

"Who'd be afraid of Mom?" Emmet's voice boomed in inquiry. He realized he was interrupting with an irrelevant question and he closed his lips and leaned back to be quiet.

"Amanda can see the resemblance of Amy in you, Mom," Alice continued. "That is why you frightened her this evening. Her nightmare was reliving her mother's…death…and when she woke, you were right there. Cold. White....and still,"

"Oh no," Esme gasped and hid her face in her palms. Carlisle pulled her closer to him and held her. Alice hung her head feeling badly for making her mother so upset. She had not meant to drag up the past, but she wanted to explain Amanda's fears of Esme. No one spoke, which was a good thing because Alice was not finished with her inside information.

"I think…" Alice began, "I think that Amanda is smarter than we have given her credit for. She may not know what we are, but she certainly is not oblivious to the fact we are different,"

"What do you mean?" Rosalie asked softly, intensely interesting in what her sister was trying to say.

"I mean that Amanda has been putting together the pieces every since we met her. She will figure out soon enough what we are. I can see her as clear as day in our future. This is not some whim relationship with the child. We are permanently ingrained in her life now. It is only a matter of time before she figures us out. She is going to begin making accusations. Starting this morning," Alice spoke gently, surly, and everyone gave her his or her full attention.

"What do we do?" Jasper asked, looking to his father for the answer. Carlisle was not sure. Esme put her head to his shoulder.

"I say we let her ask questions and we tell her the truth!" Emmet suggested. He prepared to be smacked in the head by someone, but nothing happened. Rosalie had not hit him like she sometimes did when he made a silly suggestion.

"We can't expose ourselves. It will endanger her too greatly," Carlisle said rationally.

"No. I think Emmet is right," Rosalie said. Suddenly, she was the center of attention. Alice smiled very faintly. She was glad to have her sister on her side for a change. "If we are not planning on leaving Amanda, then we can't lie to her forever,"

"She is only a little girl. What will she think of us?" Esme whispered, horrified for her granddaughter to find out the truth about their condition. Most children were scared of monsters and that is what the Cullen family, in spite of their efforts, were.

No one could answer Esme question. Yet, silently, they were all committing to no longer lie to Amanda about themselves. They would not reveal anything to her or give her too much ammunition against them, but they were no longer going to hide the truth when confronted.

*

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Amanda slept until early morning. When she woke it was Esme who was in her room, watching her.

The surprise on Amanda's face made Esme wonder if her decision to have a moment alone with her granddaughter was a good idea. Amanda didn't scream. She didn't try to run or hide. So, Esme smiled carefully and moved in her seat by the window to appear more human.

"Good morning, Darling. Please don't be startled. I only came to see if you were feeling up to eating some breakfast," Esme explained.

"No, thank you," Amanda squeaked, feeling shy. Esme looked too much like her dead mother to make Amanda comfortable. She had not fully understood Mrs Cullen's lure before. Now when she studied Esme's perfect, stone face, Amanda could see the woman in white from her nightmares. She could also see Amy.

"I know you were upset earlier. I hope you don't mind me being here," Esme told Amanda, "I only want to make sure you are all right,"

"You look like someone I used to know," Amanda peeped in her childlike voice unable to contain the words. Esme took an unnecessary breath and nodded. She could smell Amanda's essence. It reminded her of Amy. A small smiled formed on Esme's lips.

"You remind me of my first born daughter," Esme told Amanda the truth. Amanda thought, wondering which one she was talking about. Alice or Rosalie?

"My own baby girl," Esme explained. Amanda nodded, remembering the Cullen kids were all adopted. That was the story anyway. Esme continued, "She went missing when she was about your age and I never saw her again,"

"Oh," Amanda gasped weakly, surprised. She looked down, not sure how to respond.

"Yes, well…it was a very long time ago," Esme said airily, "I miss her very much,"

"I miss my mom too," Amanda divulged, looking at her hands in her lap as a distraction from the chocking pain she felt in her chest from saying those words out loud.

"I know you do, Baby," Esme cooed, standing up. She was unable to stay away from Amanda. "You know that she loved you, don't you?"

Amanda shrugged and tensed up, keeping her head hung. She breathed heavily, starting to get uncomfortable with the direction the conversation had headed. Esme lovingly stroked Amanda's hair behind her shoulder. Amanda didn't budge.

"She did, Amanda," Esme said with absolute certainty, "Every mother loves their baby. Even if they cannot show their love how they would like to. Your mother loved you,"

There was silence.

"Can Rosalie read to me now?" Amanda asked, still not wanting to acknowledge Esme's words of love. Esme sighed.

"I am sure she would be happy to read to you, Darling," she warmly agreed. Esme's hand brushed Amanda's hair off her forehead and she kissed the top of Amanda's head. "I will go get her for you,"

And on that note, Esme left Amanda alone to think for a few moments before sending Rosalie up to see her. Amanda was genuinely confused by the conversation she had just had with Dr Cullen's wife. She had always been so curious to find out more about her. Now that she knew a part of Esme's history, Amanda was even surer the Cullens held a deeper secret.

Before Amanda could deliberate on this idea, Rosalie knocked on the bedroom door and slipped inside. She smiled at Amanda and came to sit beside her. She waited a few seconds for the girl to speak, meanwhile touching Amanda's forehead with the back of her hand.

"How are you feeling?" Rosalie asked. Amanda shrugged. In truth, her head was still her main source of discomfort. "Is your head aching?"

"A little," Amanda admitted, she hoped this would not deter Rosalie from reading to her. She was enjoying 'Little Women' tremendously so far and it was only a couple of chapters in.

Carlisle stepped into the room with a clean spoon in his hand. Rosalie reached up to take it from him as he stepped over to the bed.

"Will you read to me, Rosie?!" Amanda immediately turned to Rosalie and used her illness as a weapon to get what she wanted. Rosalie looked from Amanda's pleading eyes to her father's face for approval. He smiled kindly and bowed his head in agreement and then left the room, shutting the door behind him.

"Only if you take another spoonful of medicine," Rosalie blackmailed mildly, holding up the book in one hand as leverage and the silver spoon in the other. She gave half smile and raised eyebrow to Amanda and waited.

"Ok, ok!" Amanda agreed, impatiently. She was not scared to take the medication in the red bottle anymore. Rosalie beamed with pride as she poured the syrup on a spoon and Amanda swallowed it with no complaint. She let Amanda wash it down with some juice and then she got settled to read.

Then something dawned on her…

"Rosie?" Rosalie inquired, before she opened the book. "No one has ever called me Rosie before,"

"I'm sorry," Amanda said quickly, worried she had offended her new friend. Rosalie was still intimidating to her. She was gorgeous and perfect in every way possible, Amanda was not so sure she was real. Rosalie was the princess doll she had always wanted. Only better because she was life-size and she read to her.

"I don't mind if you want to call me Rosie," the blonde teen offered, liking the affectionate nickname. Amanda's face lit up a bit. She put her head down on Rosalie's shoulder and then said something Rosalie didn't see coming.

"I like you," she said as Rosalie opened the book to the bookmarked page. "Even though you are so cold and pale,"

Rosalie was not sure what to say. The fact that Amanda was saying this out loud, and without any indication of knowing the reason behind these traits, made Rosalie stop and think. Amanda impatiently tapped on the book with one finger. Rosalie let a smile break through on her face.

"You know what?. I like you too, Amanda," she answered, "Even though you can be a little brat at times!"

Amanda looked up at Rosalie and saw she was smiling. She giggled and tapped on the book again. Rosalie removed her finger from the page playfully and then took a sighing breath before she began to read….

_"Once upon a time, there were four girls, who had enough to eat and drink and wear, a good many comforts and pleasures, kind friends and parents who loved them dearly, and yet they were not contented."_

_"These girls were anxious to be good and made many excellent resolutions, but they did not keep them very well, and were constantly saying, 'If only we had this,' or 'If we could only do that,' quite forgetting how much they already had, and how many things they actually could do. So they asked an old woman what spell they could use to make them happy, and she said, 'When you feel discontented, think over your blessings, and be grateful.'" _

_"Being sensible girls, they decided to try her advice, and soon were surprised to see how well off they were. One discovered that money couldn't keep shame and sorrow out of rich people's houses, another that, though she was poor, she was a great deal happier, with her youth, health, and good spirits, than a certain fretful, feeble old lady who couldn't enjoy her comforts, a third that, disagreeable as it was to help get dinner, it was harder still to go begging for it and the fourth, that even carnelian rings were not so valuable as good behavior. So they agreed to stop complaining, to enjoy the blessings already possessed, and try to deserve them, lest they should be taken away entirely, instead of increased, and I believe they were never disappointed or sorry that they took the old woman's advice."_

Rosalie took a break to steal a look at Amanda. She has been so selfish in her life as a human and ever since in her new life as a vampire. She had had all the nicest things and the Cullens as her loyal family who loved her unconditionally. Rosalie frowned as she gazed upon Amanda. The tired, little girl had already fallen asleep, holding tightly to her arm. Amanda was not unlike herself; left bitter and angry from events out of their control. Rosalie could identify with how hard it was to trust new people.

Rosalie closed the book, put it on the nightstand, and turned off the light. She stayed with Amanda, though, not wanting to ruin this precious moment.

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_*Note: Italic quoted from 'Little Woman', chapter 4.  
_

**Review! It makes me happy! :D**


	18. Ripped Out Pages

**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Eighteen  
**

|Ripped Out Pages|

It was Thursday afternoon, almost three days after Amanda's horrible night terror that left her in shambles. Amanda had been forced to expose deep wounds and she did so with force and misplaced anger. Dr Cullen and his wife took the brunt of the hits.

It was not a total loss. The experience had opened up a part of Amanda's past that she had kept hidden within her for almost a year. She was forced to face her fears, Esme Cullen being one of them. Eventually, Amanda cooled down and began to feel more comfortable letting them inside her personal space.

For two days, Amanda was left in Esme's care. Esme made Amanda stay in bed or on the sofa like Carlisle instructed. She brought her every meal in bed and took the time to read to the little girl when Rosalie was not around to do so. Amanda had no choice except to get to know the mysterious, pale woman that reminded her so much of her late mother. And with day two coming to an end, Amanda's illness was practically gone and she was feeling bold enough to assert herself again.

Now, being that it was the afternoon with the Cullen kids back from school, Amanda had come to life again. She didn't want to stay lying down. The liquid medicine she was taking for her stuffy head worked wonders. The cold had simmered down and she was feeling much better and only had a bit of a sore throat and sniffles.

"Quick, Mandi! Get back on the couch! Dad is coming home, like, right now!" Alice told Amanda, hopping up from the game floor beside Emmet and Jasper.

They were playing a four-way tournament of Mario Kart on Jasper's Wii and it was getting heated. Amanda scrunched up her face at Alice's warning and leaned into Emmet with her steering wheel still in hand. Emmet's vehicle on the television was knocked off the road.

"YEAAAAH!" Amanda yelled out and jumped up in joy as she won that round. She was getting pretty good at that game. Emmet pouted as Amanda beamed in his direction. "I totally destroyed you!" she exclaimed pointing her controller at him gleefully. There was the sound of the front door being opened, everyone looked, and then it was closed.

"Don't say I didn't warn you!" Alice sang and she pranced up to Carlisle as he came into the living room where the kids were all located besides Rosalie. She had gone hunting with Esme while the other three kids watched Amanda. "Hi Daddy!" Alice chirped and jumped up into his arms for a hug. She giggled as he squeezed her and then set her down again. Amanda hoped this would distract him for a moment while she dropped the control to the ground by Emmet.

Amanda shoved the controller behind Emmet's body by nudging it with her foot. She held her hands behind her back innocently.

"Amanda, I do recall your instructions were to be resting today," Carlisle said with a soft smile. He was not upset with her. She shrugged.

"I was bored!" she said with emphasis. Carlisle nodded and suppressed a chuckle.

"Well, if you feeling better then I suppose you can play video games until it is time to eat," he conceded.

"Will I be eating alone again?" Amanda asked, sharply, hinting for information. She watched Alice's expression this time instead of Carlisle's, beginning to realize that not much could shake the handsome doctor's calm streak. Alice pursed her lips and looked away.

"That depends on the kids," Carlisle spoke calmly.

"I've eaten!" Emmet and Jasper said at the same time. It was very suspicious sounding.

"When? You've been playing Mario Kart with me for hours!" Amanda pressed the boys. They sat frozen, not sure what to say.

"We don't have to eat as often as you, Mandi," Alice offered the honest truth to the prying child without saying too much. Emmet grinned and gave one, big nod in support of his sister's answer.

"You are a growing girl, on the other hand, and you have to eat supper whether we eat with you or not," Carlisle said. Amanda let her head tilt to one side and she glared at him curiously. "Now, do you want to keep playing or would you rather eat and go to bed?" he added to change the topic. It worked. Amanda straightened out and stopped asking questions.

"I am not tired!" she stated. Carlisle chuckled and bowed out of the room leaving the children to play their games.

"Geez, Amanda! Always have to push the boundaries!" Emmet teased, pulling Amanda down into his lap and he began to tickle her as gently as he knew how. Amanda shrieked with laughter. Emmet was the big brother she had always wanted. He didn't seem as scary to Amanda as he had been when she first met him. Alice giggled and joined in, poking at Amanda's soft skin very lightly. Amanda screamed with laughter, begging them to stop. Jasper watched on, enjoying the happy moment that was traipsing through the air.

Amanda was a lot more comfortable with the Cullen family now that she had opened up to them about her mom's death. So comfortable, in fact, that she was now outwardly fishing for information on their strange ways.

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"I already told you…I don't like carrots!" Amanda said forcefully to Dr Cullen who had been left to watch her have her supper. The Cullen kids went into hiding around the human's mealtime everyday to avoid questioning. He sighed and gave her a sterner look than he normally gave. She crossed her arms in protest, not backing down. She could tell he was softening and that he would not force her to eat them like Elizabeth would have. "I refuse!" she told him indignantly. The phone rang. She waited for Dr Cullen to pick it up, but he ignored it.

"Amanda, I am not going to ask you again. You only have two tiny carrots to finish and then you may leave the table," he explained to the child. The phone rang again.

"But I really hate carrots. They taste like crap! I will puke if I eat them!" Amanda argued dramatically. Carlisle took a breath at her outrageous accusations and language choice. He was too preoccupied trying to hear who had called to discipline her properly. Esme had picked up the phone in the other room. It was Elizabeth calling to check on Amanda. He sighed and gave up on the carrots.

"I am sure that is an exaggeration, but I will give you the benefit of the doubt on that point since you have been ill," he told her, finally giving up. Amanda smiled and relaxed her arms as he took her plate from her. "It is just such a waste of good food," he added, thinking about how many humans in the world were going without food at that very moment.

"Well, then…why don't you eat them?" Amanda suggested with intent to get a rise out of Dr Cullen. He turned to see if she was serious. She smiled mischievously at him. He was about to send her straight to bed for being rude, but his wife's lovely voice echoed gracefully through the hallway and into the kitchen.

"Amanda!" Esme called from the living room. Amanda perked up and turned away from Carlisle. "Elizabeth is on the phone for you, Honey,"

Amanda jumped from her seat and ran to the phone, happy to have gotten away with not eating her vegetables. Esme smiled warmly at the little girl. She was so pleased that Amanda was feeling well again. She handed Amanda the phone and then left the room to give her some privacy, even though she and Carlisle could still faintly hear Elizabeth's voice through the phone all the way from the kitchen.

"Hello?" Amanda said quietly, not sure what to say to Elizabeth. This was the first time they were speaking with one another since the day Cole had been killed. Elizabeth was able to keep herself pulled together for the sake of Amanda. She had cried another in the last several days to dehydrate her for life, she figured.

"Hello, Sweetie. How are you? Esme tells me you are just getting over a cold," she inquired about Amanda's well being, gently.

"Ya," Amanda replied dully. It sounded to her like Elizabeth was already informed about her illness so she had no more to say about it.

"Well, I sure hope you are listening to Dr Cullen and his wife. Have you been good?" Elizabeth asked, sensing Amanda's attitude by the tone of her voice.

"Yes," Amanda said after a slight hesitation. She bit her lip and waited for Elizabeth to say more. In the kitchen, Esme and Carlisle shared a glance. Esme smirked and Carlisle ran his hand though his hair. Amanda was a lot more trouble then their four adopted vampire kids ever were. And that was saying something.

"All right then. Keep it up. I will be home on Sunday before Noon. Don't get yourself into any mischief in the meantime," she warned Amanda.

"I don't do it on purpose, you know!" Amanda answered back, getting defensive, yet not angry at the insinuation that she was a troublemaker. "I can't help it sometimes," Amanda made excuses. She was just impulsive and made poor choices based on her wants alone and didn't think of consequences.

"Who are you responsible for, Amanda?" Elizabeth asked in a lectured tone. This was the same question she asked Amanda every time the little girl made excuses for why she did they things she did that got her into trouble. Amanda didn't answer right away, sighing at this repetitive question. "Amanda? Who are--"

"Me!" Amanda huffed exasperatingly before Elizabeth could fully repeat the question.

"Precisely. Now, be on your best behavior. Do as Carlisle and Esme ask of you," Elizabeth said sweetly and lovingly. Amanda hated the nice voice she used when she was being told to be good. It was annoying. "I will see you soon, Darling. I miss you very much,"

The last few sentences made Amanda calm down. The kind, honest words Elizabeth spoke were clearly genuine and said with loving intent. Amanda missed Elizabeth too. Even though Amanda was not sure how to relay that message without sounding weak, she tried to respond.

"Okay," Amanda said in a shy voice. She shrunk in her own disappointment. She wanted to tell Elizabeth how much she missed her too, but it was hard for her to say the words, to show she cared.

"Have a good evening, Sweetie," Elizabeth whispered lovingly as they ended the call. Amanda tried to think of something to say back that was better then 'okay', but the time was ticking and she panicked and quickly replied.

"Yep,"

Amanda heard the phone go dead on the other end and she didn't move for a few second as she contemplated the phone conversation she had just had. She reluctantly hung up the telephone on its cradle and stood there for a moment feeling a horrible unease in her chest. She was homesick.

"Amanda? Are you feeling all right, Honey?" Esme asked, watching the child where she had entered the room. Amanda gasped and flung around to see that they voice was just Mrs Cullen's. She nodded, squinting, not being very convincing. It took all her strength not to cry. Esme could tell she was upset. She smiled gently and reached out her hand to the child.

"Would you like to watch a movie before bed?" Esme asked, thinking that a distraction might help Amanda.

The distraction worked. Esme soon had Amanda wrapped in a quilt so she would be warm enough and sitting on the sofa in front of the huge 60-inch television. After fifteen minutes into the movie, 'Casper', Amanda was at ease and had forgotten about missing Elizabeth.

The movie was one she had never seen before and she had picked it from a pile that Alice and Emmet had compiled for her of popular children movies. Esme stayed and watched with Amanda to keep her company and soon, Amanda found herself cuddled up to Esme with her head on her lap, facing the TV screen. Esme's cold hand stroked her hair every once and a while, but Amanda was getting used to it. All of the Cullen's were cold to the touch.

There was a part of the movie when the girl heroine touched Casper, the ghost, and she commented on how cold he was. Amanda's body flexed as she made a connection and then she relaxed. Esme noticed, but didn't stop stroking the child's hair.

Nearing the end of the movie, something caught Amanda's attention, though she did not move to show this recognition. The kids on screen were having a Halloween party at the house where Casper lived and some of the student's costumes made Amanda stop and think. Some of the costumes were ghosts, goblins, zombies, witches, and then there were a few vampires.

She didn't know how very close she was to knowing the truth about the Cullens.

*

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*

Amanda didn't know what to think when she made the correlation between the characters dressed up in Halloween attire in the fictional movie she had just finished watching. As soon as it had ended, Esme told her to go up to bed. Amanda did as she was told, not sure what to make of her ideas about monsters, ghosts and the Cullens. She wasn't scared.

Amanda continued to stew over the make-believe monsters she had just viewed from the movie as she brushed her teeth and combed her hair in the bathroom. She stopped when she was finished and looked at her face in the mirror. She touched her skin and felt its texture and temperature. It felt normal. What she expected from herself.

She gave up and turned out the light in the bathroom and went back into the bedroom where she found Alice and Rosalie sitting on her bed with the covers pulled down. Dr Cullen's black medical bag was also on the bed. Alice smiled cheerfully and slapped her hand on the place where she wanted Amanda to come. Rosalie was smiling as well, but not with such avid excitement.

Amanda gave Alice a sarcastic eyebrow raise and came over to the bed dragging her feet on the carpet and then poking Alice's shoulder with her finger. She felt a snap of static, but Alice now raised her eyebrows at Amanda in fake horror.

"Oooo...static electricity," Alice responded sarcastically in a dull voice. Amanda laughed a bit and climbed the bed. She still thought Alice was an oddball, but she liked that about the elfin girl.

Amanda crawled up over the thick duvet and back into the pillows to face the teen girls who she thought of as her friends. Rosalie held out a thermometer and Amanda frowned and opened her mouth to complain.

"Uh uh ah…just do as you are told, Amanda," Rosalie stopped her with a kind, but firm authority. Alice giggled, making Amanda glare at her. "Come on now, open up," Rosalie demanded. Amanda did so and held the thermometer under her tongue for the three minutes that was required of her. She knew the routine.

Alice got bored waiting, seeing as she was always bouncing around and doing something with every second of her time. She started to rummage through her dad's bag. Rosalie slapped her hand once in playful scolding. The girls chuckled at each other and Amanda found it amusing.

Alice pulled out Carlisle's stethoscope and studied it curiously for a few seconds and then she grinned and put the pieces in her ears and held the bell to Amanda's chest where her heart sat inches away under her ribcage. Alice's eyes nearly bulged out of her head at the intense sounds she could make out with that tool amplifying every detail it picked up.

"Whoa!" Alice exclaimed in thrill. Amanda's nearly let the thermometer fall out from her mouth.

"Whaaa?" she mumbled with her mouth barely opening. Rosalie straightened the thermometer and tisked Amanda for moving.

"Alice! Put it away!" Rosalie scolded her little sister. Alice took off the stethoscope and instead of putting it back in the bag she reached across Amanda and put the ear pieces in Rosalie's ears. It made Rosalie perk up instantly to hear sounds already heightened become amplified and more clear. She was going to put the tool away, but her curiosity was too high now. She looked at Amanda carefully, wondering, wanting so badly to listen more closely to the beating of the child's heart.

"May I?" Rosalie asked, unsure if she should or not, but deeply interested on what Amanda's heart would sound like at an even more heightened frequency. She held the bell out to Amanda who shrugged, not caring at all, letting the teen place it on her chest. Rosalie's mouth fell open in amazement. Alice smiled widely and nodded.

"See?! So cool, right?"

Rosalie agreed with Alice, taking a few more seconds to listen. It was new to them and a novelty to hear the sound of a beating heart. The house was usually so quiet. Amanda, now getting impatient and wanting to know what the fuss was about, took the thermometer out of her mouth and handed it to Rosalie.

"I want a turn, Rosie!" Amanda said reached out for the stethoscope. Rosalie's face fell and she took it out of her ears and shook her head, reading the mercury scale with one hand as she folded it up to be put back into the bag. Amanda grabbed onto one end before Rosalie could finish.

"Not right now, Mandi. It is your bedtime," Alice said softly, trying to help the situation since it had been her fault for starting it in the first place.

"Hey! That's not fair!" Amanda stated shrilly. Rosalie gently tried to pry the stethoscope from the little girl's grip.

"Not right now! Dad won't like us playing with his things," Rosalie reasoned. Amanda frowned and didn't let go of her latch on the stethoscope tubing. It was a mini tug-o-war of sorts. One that Rosalie had to win, because there was no way she or Alice could let Amanda listen to their non-beating hearts.

"Heh hem," Carlisle cleared his throat from the doorway, where he leaned to announce his presence. Alice made an 'O' with her mouth before pursing her lips slightly. Rosalie glared at Alice for getting them into trouble. "That is not a toy," he said calmly as Amanda finally released and Rosalie quickly tucked his stethoscope inside his bag.

"Sorry, Daddy. We were just curious," Alice was the first to apologize, being honest about her mistake. Rosalie was too proud to say she was sorry. She wasn't actually sorry for anything.

"Her temperature is back to normal and her last dose of the Acetaminophen was early this morning," Rosalie informed her father like she had been sent up here to do. Alice had followed her despite her wishes and things had gotten out of control. Carlisle nodded at Rosalie with appreciation and then got back to the task at hand.

"I think it is time for Amanda to get some sleep, girls," Carlisle told his daughters strictly to let them know it was none negotiable. Alice stood up fast and pranced to the doorway. Rosalie slowly got up as her dad came toward the bed to stand next to where she had been sitting.

"Aw," Amanda complained, not wanting to go to bed yet.

"Night, Mandi! Sleep tight. Don't let the bed bugs bite!" Alice sang as she danced out of the room. Emmet was passing in the hallway at the time.

"Or anything else for that matter!" Emmet added in a deep, joking voice that had every vampire in the house holding his or her breath in shock. Except for Carlisle who kept his cool as he closed his black bag and latched it shut. Amanda just thought it was weird and ignored Emmet's strange comment.

"Uh…goodnight, Amanda," Rosalie stuttered, slipping herself out of the room. Emmet opened his arms for a hug, but she swatted his head with her hand and walked on by him shaking her head in disgust. Emmet shrugged and followed her downstairs.

Amanda sighed and looked up at Dr Cullen with disdain.

"Goodnight, Amanda," he told her kindly.

"Can Rosie read to me for a little bit?" she asked as sweetly as she could, changing her attitude. "Pleeeese?" she begged. She even smiled coyly, and blinked her eyelashes a few times. Carlisle knew she was trying to manipulate him. He smiled, regardless and shook his head.

"Not tonight, Dear. It is getting late and you need to get a good night's rest. You have school in the morning," he told her. Amanda flopped back, her fake smile gone. She didn't like the sound of that. As horrible as it was to be sick and to have a fever, stuffy head, and headache; Amanda liked staying home to watch movies and be read to.

"Boo," she said deeply and she pulled the blankets up over her head.

"Pleasant dreams," Carlisle sighed as if he was willing it to be so. He picked up his bag, and left the room, closing the door behind him.

*

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In the early morning, before the sun was out, Amanda woke up having to use the washroom. Once she was finished in there, she saw a glow of light under her doorway and decided to sneak out to see where it was coming from. The hallway was dark, the light coming from a room a few doors down. Amanda crept slowly towards the room and looked inside.

It was Carlisle's study. Amanda remembered it from the brief tour she had taken of the house when Alice had invited her and Tyler over for the afternoon a month ago. Amanda scoped the room and saw it was empty of people. The only light on was the desk lamp on a tall, wooden desk. She noticed that there were less photographs on the walls than there had been the last time she had taken a quick peek at the room.

Amanda decided to take a look around. In her mind, as long as she was quiet she wouldn't be caught. The Cullens were all supposedly in bed. Unbeknown to her, they were all downstairs listening to her footsteps on the hardwood floor above them.

"What do we do? She thinks we are in bed?" Rosalie whispered so softly only her family could hear her.

"Just wait. She'll go back to bed soon," Alice replied just as softly, for that is what Alice saw in Amanda's future when she took a look ahead. And that was what Amanda was planning to do, after she snooped around Dr Cullen's office a bit.

"She sure is a handful!" Jasper gave his opinion lightly. He smiled at Alice who seemed to like Amanda's impulsive, childlike ways. Rosalie sighed and nodded along with Jasper's assessment.

"She's funny! I can't believe she hasn't figured us out, though," Emmet whispered too, but he was louder than the rest. Alice shushed him and he tried to be quieter when he asked, "Not the brightest monkey of the bunch, is she?"

"She's only eight years old!" Alice said in Amanda's defense, "Nine soon! We are all going to be invited to her birthday party, by the way,"

Emmet gave Alice a teasing glare and made a disgusting face at her and she reciprocated by sticking her tongue out at him.

"Children!" Esme said sternly, but in a hushed voice, "That's enough,"

Meanwhile, upstairs, Amanda had spotted something on the very top shelf of one of the high bookshelves that lined the room. It was a tiny box with a lock on it, but it looked like it was open with a few things poking out. Amanda knew she should let it go, but it was calling out to her. And she had a feeling that whatever was in that box, up so high out of her reach, was part of the secret she knew the Cullen's were keeping.

So, without thinking it through, Amanda began to climb the shelves like a ladder. It was not too difficult to do. She was good at climbing trees and this had all the shelves to hold on to and step on as she climbed upward. It only took her a few seconds to scale the bookcase to the top, about ten feet off the ground. She steadied her self with one hand holding on tightly to the wooden board and with the other she reached for the box.

She flipped the lid open and pulled out the contents. It was a stack of unframed, old photographs. She brought them close to her face to see. The light from the desk lamp was so far away it was harder for Amanda to make out who was in the photos.

Once her eyes adjusted she was able to see that the first picture was of Rosalie. It was hard to tell in the darkness, but the photograph was black and white. Rosalie was dressed up in a long, full-length dress and wore long gloves and sat posed with a frilly umbrella on a chair. Amanda was a bit confused by the get up but she didn't think too much of it. If she had of been paying attention, the back of the photo read, 'May 1920,' on it.

Amanda carefully dropped that photo into the box to look at the next. She shifted her weight on the shelves so she had a better grip. The large piece of tall furniture hit the wall. The Cullen's heard it and wondered what was going on, but didn't investigate. Alice was too busy cheating her way through a game of chess with Emmet to see what was coming.

Amanda looked again at the photos in her hand. This was an odd one. She thought it looked like her for a moment. She had to pull it up so close to her face it practically touched her nose to see that it was another little girl about her age, who happened to look a lot like herself. Esme stood beside the little girl, holding her hand, looking slightly less magnificent in beauty than she looked in present time. The photo was in color and even in the dim light, Amanda noticed Esme's eyes were blue and not the soft, honey brown they were today.

Amanda remembered Esme telling her about having a daughter that she lost a long time ago. She saw writing on the corner of the picture and read it carefully. 'My Darling Amy' it read, '1971'. Amanda's mouth dropped. That was her mother's name. She wondered why Esme had not told her that her daughter had the same name as her mother. They had talked about her enough the past few days.

Amanda was only eight, but she knew that the seventies were over thirty years earlier then the present date. And Mrs Cullen looked identical to the woman in the old, roughed up, photograph. As if she had not aged one bit.

Amanda gulped and took a breath, leaning to put that photo back in the box and move on to the next one. Her hands were getting sweaty from holding on so tightly to the shelves. She shifted her body to get a better hold, but she felt her hand slipping and instinctively let go of the photos in her other hand to grab the shelf. The bookcase banged against the wall again, wavering just slightly.

Alice saw it happen all too fast. She sprang up from Jasper's embrace and knocked the chess board over in the process. Without explanation, for there was no time, she ran at top speed up to Carlisle's study.

It was nearly too late, Amanda's hands slipped right off the wood grained board and she fell back. Books, frames, the box all slid from the shelves and crashed onto the floor. The photographs went flying in the air, fluttering around her as she fell. The bookcase was falling down after her. Amanda hit something hard, but it was not the floor, then something smacked into her head with force.

She gazed up, startled, to see Alice holding her tightly with one hand and the other hand holding the bookcase from crushing them both. In one swift movement Alice let Amanda slide to the floor and she straightened the bookcase back up against the wall. The rest of the Cullen family were in the room as well.

Amanda sat on the floor where Alice had placed her and gawked in astonishment.

"You just—I mean…you caught that whole thing!" Amanda marveled at Alice's unlikely strength. The little pixie girl was not very much bigger than Amanda and was thin as a rail. The bookcase was ten feet tall and made of hard, heavy wood that would have crushed a grown man of Emmet's stature.

Before Alice or anyone else could speak, something trickled down Amanda's face and she reached up to wipe it away. She looked at her hand and saw red. There was a snarl and she turned to see Emmet glaring, growling, teeth bared as if to attack, trying to get at her, but Jasper held him off. She gasped and kicked herself backwards. It was the most ferocious face Amanda had ever seen.

"Get him out!" Carlisle said in the loudest, most urgent tone Amanda had ever heard from the patient doctor. He was by her side in a split second with his bag out. Jasper, Rosalie, Esme and Alice all pulled Emmet from the room. Jasper had him calmed down in moments, but they all headed outside to be as far away from Amanda's open head wound to avoid catastrophe.

"What's wrong? Is Emmet mad at me?" Amanda inquired, quivering in fear.

"Nothing is wrong. He is not mad, he was just scared about you being hurt," Carlisle lied to calm Amanda down. He pulled a sterile gauze from his bag, ripped open the packet, and pressed it firmly to Amanda's cut forehead.

"Are you mad?" Amanda begged to hear that she was not in trouble. She was nearly in tears, but her shock kept her from crying. Carlisle held her head in his hands, not letting go of the red gauze he held over her right eye.

"Shh, Honey," he told her and he smiled calmly. "Of course I am not mad," Her heart rate was high. She was frightened and he wanted her to relax. "Are you hurting anywhere else, Sweetheart?" he asked her gently. She shook her head in his hands.

She didn't feel any pain, but she was scared of all the blood that had dripped down her face and onto her pajama top and the floor. Emmet's snarled face was still etched into her mind. Carlisle had no time to explain Emmet's reaction to Amanda; he got her off the floor and on his desk, with her head on his sweater and examined her for further injuries. Alice's voice called out from outside, but only Carlisle heard his daughter's voice. Amanda heard silence.

"She's going to be all right. It is just a cut on her head that needs stitching up," Alice said somberly, feeling guilty for not stopping this sooner. Amanda had nearly been killed. Carlisle's fears were dampened when he heard Alice's words. He sighed and smiled at Amanda, who was not speaking anymore.

"You're going to be just fine, Amanda," he told her. He took a fresh piece of white padding and placed it over the red, soaked gauze and pulled up one of Amanda's hands to replace his. "I need to you hold this very tight for a few minutes. Can you do that for me?"

Amanda nodded, her breath shaking as she inhaled and exhaled. Carlisle smiled at her and told her to lie very still while he got a few things to clean her up with. Amanda obeyed and for the moment or so he was out of the room she began to calm down and remember what she had just witnessed. She planned to ask him about it later.

*

*

*

Once Amanda had calmed down and the wound had time to clot, Carlisle had her remove her hand from her head. He wiped her hands and face with a damp towel and cleaned out the one inch cut above her right eyebrow with a swab soaked in Betadine. She winced a little, but balled her fists to keep herself from crying.

"You are doing great, Amanda," Carlisle encouraged. He began to make conversation with her to take her mind of what he was doing. "Have you ever had sutures before?"

Amanda watched him, her eyes worried, but she didn't answer.

"Stitches," Carlisle corrected, using the other term. Amanda shook her head just a bit. He smiled. "Well. Lucky for you, I have done this thousands of times,"

"Thousands?" Amanda squeaked, skeptical of that large number. Little did she know that Carlisle had been around long enough to be true to his word. He nodded, not having to lie in this case.

"Yes, and I happen to be very good at them," he told her to keep her interest while he pulled a syringe from his bag and a bottle of Lidocaine. He kept them held low as he filled the hypodermic needle with the numbing liquid.

"Will it hurt?" Amanda asked, trying not to sound scared, but her voice shook, giving her away. Carlisle leaned over her and smiled soothingly.

"I have to put something on the cut to numb the area. That will sting a little bit, but only for a few seconds. The stitches won't hurt at all. I promise," he told her honestly. Amanda nodded, trusting him. She had come to learn that Dr Cullen was not a lying man and that he was a very good, caring doctor.

"Now, close your eyes, Sweetheart. That's good. Keep them closed until I tell you to open them and lie very still for me,"

Amanda kept her eyes shut tight, and felt a tiny pinch as he injected the Lidocaine around the small cut in a few spots. She felt a sharp sting and tensed up, but held still. Carlisle stroked the side of her face with his finger as he continued to injected the Lidocaine around the open wound. A very quiet whimper escaped her lips and her chin quivered in fright, but Carlisle was quick. When he was done he put the needle away in a case to dispose of later.

"The worst is over, Honey. You can open your eyes now," he told Amanda. When she did, a few wet tears appeared under her eyelashes. He wiped them away with a tissue. Amanda relaxed when Dr Cullen began to suture the cut closed. He had not lied to her. She felt a tiny tug of the knots being tied and cut, but there was no more pain.

"Dr Cullen?" Amanda asked cautiously as he finished trimming the last stitch. He smiled at her and put his tools down on a towel. He encouraged her to go on with a short nod. "Are the people in those picture really you guys?" she asked, pointing her finger to the scattered photos on the floor.

"Yes, Honey. Those are photographs of us," he whispered solemnly, reluctant to be honest, but knowing he had no other choice. It went against his better judgment to tell Amanda these things, but Alice was almost never wrong about these sorts of futures. Amanda was slowly putting together the pieces of their family secret and if she was going to eventually find out, Carlisle thought it was better if she heard the truth.

"How come you all don't look older than your photo?" she asked again. Carlisle continued bandaging her head as he answered. Amanda watched his eyes closely, seeing them wince as he answered.

"We don't age, Sweetie," Carlisle said truthfully as he finished and tidied up his desk around her. He was concerned about cleaning the blood spots on the floor and getting Amanda changed and into clean clothing before the others came back inside. He was also stalling, hoping she would stop asking questions. "Let's get you cleaned up, Amanda," he told her, helping her sit up, but holding her steady in case she was light headed. She seemed to be fine so Carlisle picked her up and carried her over the mess of spilled books, photographs, and blood and back to Rosalie's bedroom.

Amanda put on a casual, pink track outfit Alice had bought her for gym class that she never liked. It was clean and dry so Amanda slipped it on regardless of her fashion preferences. Carlisle saw that she was fine to be left alone, not showing signs of concussion, which pleased him. He left her for a short moment to bleach the bloodstains from his study and burn all the dirtied gauze he had used.

He reappeared in Amanda's bedroom to find her sitting on her bed, looking ashamed. She looked up at him and apologized.

"I'm sorry," she said meekly. He sighed and forgave her.

"It's over now. You are fixed up and I got everything put back into its place. No harm done," he said for Amanda's ears and to announce to the family it was safe from them to come back into the house as well. Amanda looked up at him and squinted as she spoke.

"Is Emmet okay?" she asked. Emmet was always a bit daunting in person because of his size, but Amanda had gotten over her fear of him early on because of his childlike demeanor. She couldn't help but wonder if she had made him angry with her. He had the looks to kill this evening. Amanda was glad that Jasper and the others took him away when they had.

"I am fine," Emmet said sadly, his head hanging in shame as he appeared in the doorway. Carlisle stood by him and placed his hand on his son's tall shoulder. He could see that Emmet repented and he smiled warmly in forgiveness. Jasper stood behind him as a precaution now. "Are you okay?" Emmet asked. Amanda nodded, wide eyed. Emmet stayed by the door. "I am sorry I frightened you. I was just…out of my mind," he tried to explain without scaring the little girl.

"That's all right," said Amanda as her way of forgiving him. Alice's spiky black head was poking out behind Emmet, trying to get a peek of Amanda. He stepped out of the room to make space for the others. Jasper took him downstairs to keep an eye on him. Rosalie looked like she might cry she was so upset with the events that took place.

"You are really strong, Alice," Amanda said bluntly, "And fast,"

"I am sorry I was not fast enough," Alice offered, not commenting of Amanda's accusation that something was strange about her speed and strength.

"You were still pretty fast!" Amanda argued with the tiny vampire, not understanding how Alice could have gotten to her so quickly when she had not even been in the same room when she started to fall. "And freakishly strong too!" Amanda added with awe. Alice giggled.

"That was a pretty stupid thing to do, though," Rosalie finally spoke up to say what was on her mind. She had been a wreck outside waiting to see Amanda was okay. It had really worried her. She was starting to get attached to the child. As were the rest of them.

"I'm sorry," Amanda mumbled sincerely, "I was just…"

"You were being sneaky. You could have just asked one of us what was in the box and we could have gotten it down for you!" Rosalie cut her off sharply. Amanda hunched in shame. Rosalie softened her tone and continued, "No more sneaking around,"

Amanda agreed.

It was Esme, who stepped into the room next that changed the course of what was to come. Amanda straightened up and focused on the graceful vampire, who she was the most curious about. Amanda took notice of Esme's golden eye color and remembered the photograph with her blue eyes and the little girl by her side. Amanda braved the watched stares upon her and confronted Esme.

"Who was that little girl in the photo with you?" she asked softly. It was quiet. Amanda carried on, "Was that your little girl?"

It was at a crossroads until now, the road ahead was either to tell Amanda or continue to conceal the truth from her about her relation to the Cullen family. However, this was what Alice had seen and she knew what the answer would be already. She had been waiting for this moment. Alice knew that this was going to bond Amanda and her family together forever. No matter how the little girl took the news of their secret.

"Yes, that was my little girl…Amy," Esme admitted lightly, finding the words hard to say out loud. Her face wad sad in remembrance. Esme pulled herself together to utter the next few words Amanda needed to hear.

"She was your mother,"

* * *

**Please Review!**


	19. Trick Or Treat?

**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Nineteen  
**

|Trick Or Treat?|

"Mandi?" Alice asked after what was only ten seconds of silence. Rosalie nudged her little sister and gave her a disapproving glare to tell her to be patient. Amanda narrowed her eyes and tried to speak through her confusion.

"I…don't…," Amanda said slowly, not understanding the how the words, _"She was your mother,"_ Esme had just spoken, made sense.

"Amy, my little girl...was your mother," Esme repeated gently, sitting next to Amanda on Rosalie's bed. Amanda didn't move. "Do you know what that means, Honey?"

"It means you are Esme's granddaughter!" Emmet announced with a grin. Amanda's eyes widened and she tightened her lips together. Amanda knew these words. She knew that if her mother was Mrs Cullen's daughter that made Esme her grandmother. But it didn't add up. Esme looked the same age as her mother and not a day over thirty for sure. All the grandmothers Amanda had seen had at least a few grey hairs and wrinkles. Esme was stunning and youthful.

"Amanda, how are you feeling?" Carlisle asked out of concern. Amanda gulped back the build up of saliva in her mouth from not swallowing since hearing the news. "Do you want to rest for a little while? Perhaps Rosalie will read to you," he offered seeing her shock.

"No," Amanda blurted out. She turned sideways to Esme, who was sitting beside her, and studied her face. It was smooth and hard, but her expression was soft and warm. Amanda was not afraid, but she was curious about something. She lifted her hand to Esme's cheek to run her fingertip along its surface. Esme let her."You're so smooth," Amanda whispered, amazed, "and cold,"

Amanda looked to Alice first, thinking about all the times Alice had taken her hand in walking and how cold Alice had been as well. Then Amanda glanced to Rosalie and remembered how it had hurt her head when she had laid it down too hard on Rosalie's shoulder. And lastly, Amanda faced Dr Cullen, who always had cold hands.

"You're absolutely right, Amanda. We are all the same in that perspective," Carlisle told the little girl.

"How can you be so young looking?" Amanda thought to ask, facing Esme again. Grandmas were older woman, usually with a few wrinkles, walking with a cane, and with curly grey hair. That is what Amanda had always imagined when she thought of the term. It was stereotypical, but for an eight-year-old that was all she knew to envision. Then she remembered Dr Cullen's words. _"We don't age, Sweetie,"_ he had admitted to her when she had confronted him about the photographs.

Esme just sighed, not sure of what to tell Amanda. She didn't want to tell her the whole truth. The word, 'Vampire' was too scary for a child to hear. And the negative connotations that went along with it were probably already ingrained in Amanda's head from scary stories.

"We are different than you, Amanda," Jasper said, stepping forward. He had Amanda at ease and willing to hear him out with a gentle shift in the atmosphere. She looked at him to explain.

"We don't age. We stay this way forever," he told her. "We are very strong and very fast. We have heightened senses. Sight, sound, touch, smell, and taste. We don't eat food. We don't need to eat at all,"

"Ever?" Amanda asked, feeling comfortable enough in Jasper's presence to do so. He shook his head.

"Never, no," he told her honestly. He decided to leave out the rest. He would not tell her what they really were. Amanda didn't need to know the specifics. She was only a child and even if she could grow accustom to the truth, there was no time to prepare her for it.

"Amanda. This is all very secret," Carlisle stepped up closer and knelt down to her level. "Can you keep all this information about our family to yourself?"

Amanda nodded slowly, unsure. She didn't know what to tell people if she was to say anything. She wasn't even sure herself of what to think about the Cullens.

"That means you can't tell Elizabeth," Rosalie added, wanting to make sure Amanda understood, "Not even Tyler. They would not understand. They might be afraid. If people got afraid of us we would have to move and leave Kipta,"

"You can't leave!" Amanda blurted out. "I won't tell. I promise!"

"Thank you, Amanda," Rosalie appreciated. The family around her smiled gratefully as well. There was a long stretch of silence before Amanda gained up some courage to ask more questions.

"Are you dead?" Amanda asked all of a sudden, trying to figure out why they were all so cold and unchanging. "Like a ghost?"

The kids, standing in the doorway looked to their Dad and Coven leader to answer that. Amanda gulped again, knowing she was on the right track. Esme rubbed her back gently to comfort her and it made her jump a little bit. Esme pulled her hand back as Amanda looked at her.

"We are dead, Sweetheart, but please don't be frightened," Carlisle admitted to Amanda. She looked at him sadly, her eyes small and her brow furrowed in uncertainty. "Our hearts no longer beat, but we are living in the sense that our soul is still alive," That is what Carlisle believed, anyhow, and no one could tell him differently. His family, though uncertain at first, had come to follow his beliefs as well.

Amanda thought about this for a moment. She now understood what why Rosalie wouldn't let her have a turn with Dr Cullen's stethoscope last night. None of them had a heart beat to listen to.

"Please don't be afraid," Alice piped up, stepping forward, paying no head to the warning gazes that her siblings and father gave her. She took Amanda's hand and sat next to her on the opposite side. Esme remained within an arm's distance from the little girl on the other side. "We are still the same family that you have gotten to know. We all really care about you, Mandi. We just want you to be happy and safe!"

"Alice is right," Carlisle continued, "We have all grown very fond of you over the last few months and especially this past week. We hope that you won't shy from us now that you know more about our condition,"

Amanda didn't now how to respond to this. She rubbed her head, brushing the white bandage that covered the right side of her forehead and winced, and Jasper shifted his body, feeling her tension. The freezing was starting to come out now and there was some pain where the stitched had been placed. It was warm and burning. Jasper felt her discomfort, though he could not feel her pyhsical pain, and knew she was suffering a bit.

"Can we give her something for the pain, Dad?" asked Rosalie, suddenly worried about Amanda and not thinking about how they had just exposed their darkest secret to an eight year old. Carlisle was already on top of it, with a tiny white pill and a glass of water held out to Amanda.

"Take this, Amanda. It will help," he instructed her to do. Amanda held out her hand for the pill and stared at it for a second and then put it in her mouth. She had begun to trust Dr Cullen now without questioning. Even though, she didn't partically like him, she knew he was a good person. She swallowed a few mouthfuls of water to make sure the pill was gone and then handed him the glass back to Rosalie who reached for it. She smiled lovingly to the little girl.

"Is this going to leave a big scar?" Amanda asked pointing to her bandaged cut. She was suddenly self-conscious when she saw Rosalie's flawless, smiling face.

"Don't worry, Amanda. We'll put Vitamin E on it to help it heal. Besides, Dad is the best plastic surgeon there is. I doubt you will be able to see the scar once it has fully healed," Rosalie said kindly.

"I'm sorry, Mandi," Alice apologized again. Amanda shrugged. "I didn't mean to bump into you so hard. I was only trying to catch the bookcase before it fell. I wasn't watching where I was going. Before I knew it my head collided with yours,"

"That was your head?" Amanda asked, surprised. She had thought a book or a frame had hit her head. Even the bookcase itself made more sense. Alice cringed slightly. Any harder and she could have really hurt Amanda. It was a miracle she hadn't broken any of Amanda's bones when she caught her.

It was not every day Alice was in full contact with a human child. Alice felt badly, but Jasper tried to make her see reason. If it were not for her, Amanda would have been killed. There was no doubt about that. The heavy bookcase would have crushed her and the damage to her tiny frame would have been irreparable.

"You have a hard head!" Amanda announced, still amazed by Alice's feat. Alice giggled. The scene had gone a lot more smoothly than the Cullen's could have hoped for. Amanda had taken the news of their death well. Too well, probably, but they were not about to dwell on the topic. They hurried to switch shifts for the day. Dr Cullen went to work, leaving the family home with Amanda.

*

*

*

The rest of the morning and afternoon went by swiftly. They kept an eye on Amanda to make sure she was not going to run off and tell their secret to everyone she met. Amanda, shocked as she was to find out the Cullens were all dead, was suprisingly okay with the news. Rosalie feared she had a concussion and wasn't lucid yet. Carlisle disagreed with her assesment and cleared Amanda for the day. However, Esme insisted that Amanda not be made to go to school because of her head injury. Carlisle called the school and excused Amanda from classes. He did whatever Esme asked of him. She rarely asked for anything at all. When she suggested their kids be allowed home from school to entertain Amanda he agreed to that too.

The only stipulation was that Alice and Rosalie get Amanda caught up on the schoolwork she was missing that week. Which they agreed to happily, and Amanda begrudgingly succumbed to. It wasn't so bad with Rosalie and Alice's help. She whined and complained a bit, but eventually she got caught up enough to eat lunch, by herself, and then play games with the Cullen kids.

Somewhere in the middle of playing Mario Kart on Jasper's Wii, which was Amanda's favorite game, Emmet pointed out it was October 31st. "You know what that means?" he asked playfully, grinning with menace. Amanda still pictured Emmet's snarled face how it had been that morning when she had hurt herself. She cringed away from the large vampire a bit. Rosalie swatted him to stop before he scared Amanda too much. She had taken the news of their death surprisingly well and none of them wanted to jinx that.

"It is such a ridiculous holiday. I dread it every year," Jasper moaned, repressing the happy feelings coming from Emmet, and now Alice, as they realized what day it was. He despised human holidays even though Alice loved them. Halloween was his least favorite.

"Halloween is fun!" Alice piped up. "Right, Mandi?"

"I guess so," Amanda said dully, feeling Jasper's mood seeing as she was sitting right next to him. Alice shot him a warning look.

"Oh, stop being a grump or you will go as one for trick or treating tonight!" Alice threatened Jasper with a smirk. An idea was coming to her and she zoned out for a split second.

"Ooo!" she thrilled and then her eyes brightened with excitement and she took Amanda's hand. Amanda was confused, as were the other kids. "Come on. We have to figure out what you are going to wear to the carnival today!"

"Carnival?" More then one vampire said at the same time. None of them understood what Alice was so excited about suddenly. She had seen it though, so they knew they would have to play along. Or not and have an alternate future. But this way would be fun so Alice was rooting for it!

"Yes! There is a Halloween Carnival in town tonight! And we are all going!" Alice cheered. Emmet literally jumped up in the air a bit with enthusiasm. Jasper smiled ruefully and Rosalie looked to her mother for her say. Amanda wriggled her hand out of Alice's and stepped back from the overly excited pixie girl.

"I don't see why we can't all go. Make it a family night out," Esme agreed.

"Yes. A family event!" Alice thrilled. Rosalie beamed too. She was too happy to go to a human carnival and having Amanda with them gave them the perfect excuse to go. Any event that made them appear more human was fine by her.

Rosalie reached for Amanda's hand before Alice could take it again. "Come on! Let's go make costumes!" she told the child as she practically dragged her out of the room and towards the staircase. Alice followed closely behind, skipping and demanding to have her say.

"I already know what we are going as, Rose! Let me help! It will go faster!"

*

*

*

"Oh my God, no way!" Amanda protested as she saw herself in the full-length mirror of Alice's walk in closet. She grimaced the costume Alice and Rosalie had picked out for her and then in less than fifteen minutes sewn together on Alice's fancy sewing machine.

"Shhh…don't use the Lord's name in vain," Rosalie quietly hushed Amanda knowing her father was a religion man. Alice and Amanda made a face at the pretty blonde at the same time. "What?" Rosalie asked innocently.

"Suck up!" Alice shot at her. "He's not even here!" Rosalie made a face at her little sister and went back to straightening out Amanda's costume.

"I'm not going out like this. I look stupid! " Amanda proclaimed, tugging at the hood with ears that was stuck on her head. The light brown, fur covered material covered her entire body and even had build in shoe covers. She pulled at the costume, but couldn't get it to come off. Alice removed her hand from the hood to stop her from trying to escape from it.

"You look...darling!" she cooed. Rosalie agreed. "Besides, we don't have all day to make you another costume. We need to finish everyone else's,"

"It took you, like, ten minutes to sew!" Amanda complained, "Can't I be something scarier? Like a witch or something dead?"

"I think we have enough of that. Now go brush your teeth and grab a pillowcase for trick or treating," Rosalie instructed, not playing on the word, 'dead'.

"But…I…" Amanda began to rebuff.

"It will be fun, Mandi. Lighten up!" Alice chirped, patting Amanda on the back in the direction of the door.

"We are nearly finished. Now, go get yourself ready and don't mess up your costume!" Rosalie said taking a place at the sewing machine and beginning to speedily put together the other costumes. Alice stood over her shoulder giving instructions and the pair of them bickered away at each other.

Amanda went to the bathroom and slowly brushed her teeth. She frowned at the sight of her wimpy costume when she saw her reflection in the mirror. On her face Alice had painted on a black nose and a few thin whiskers. Amanda pulled at the hood again to remove it, but it was on snugly and buttoned in the back. The zipper of the costume was also in the back and no matter how Amanda turned to undo it, but she couldn't reach.

She gave up and made a snarled face in the mirror and clawed her hands to try to make it look a bit more frightening, but it didn't help. She frowned again at the face in the mirror that had a white, square band-aid on the forehead above its right eyebrow. Amanda sighed in despair.

"You look cute, Mandi. Leave your costume alone!" Alice called out from the other room and then she want back to arguing with Rosalie over Emmet's costume. Amanda stuck her tongue out at Alice and Rosalie's voices still bickering in the next room.

"I totally saw that, Mandi!" Alice said loudly.

Amanda retracted her tongue and her mouth fell open. '_How?'_ she wondered, looking for a video camera or something. _'Alice is so weird!'_ Amanda straightened up and turned out the light, disgruntled. She grabbed the pink pillowcase from one of the pillows on the bed and then left the room. She ran down the hallway, nearly bumping into Carlisle dressed in his work clothes with his briefcase in his hand and a thin coat draped over his arm. It was half passed five and he was done with work for the day.

"Ah!" she yelped, as she stopped and braced for impact. Nothing happened.

"Ooop," Carlisle said, swiftly moving out of her way. He smiled at her costume. "Well, don't you look adorable?"

"I look like a fruitcake!" Amanda said dramatically. Carlisle crinkled his brow, but kept his smile. He assumed 'fruitcake' was some new term kids were using today so he didn't question it. A lot had changed since he was a young lad in the seventeenth century.

"What exactly are you, my dear?" he asked her, noting the long thick tail and the triangular ears.

"I'm a…kangaroo," Amanda said, hardly saying the last word. She looked down as she admitted it, embarrassed. Carlisle chuckled.

"You make a very good looking kangaroo, Dear," he told her to try to cheer her up. Amanda grumbled.

"Dad! Your costume is on your bed. Go change so we can leave. The carnival has already started!" Alice sang from the other room where she and Rosalie were ready and forcing Jasper and Emmet into their costumes with bribes of a more mature nature than they could say out loud.

Carlisle bowed his head to Amanda and said, "I'd better go get dressed. Alice is far too excited to argue with her,"

"No kidding!" Amanda agreed, waving her hand down her body to show off her costume that was not of her choosing. Carlisle grinned and turned to go down to the last bedroom at the end of the hall. It was Esme's and his room. Amanda sighed and wondered what to do next.

She made her way downstairs and was surprised to find the others all mulling around the foyer. They had moved fast! Alice wore light pink tights with a mini dress striped in two shades of pink that had a squiggly tail in the back. She wore pink, pointed ears on her head. Rosalie was beside her in a orange and black striped spandex costume with a longer spiral tail and pointed orange ears. Her face was painted with pink nose and black whiskers.

Jasper looked like he was in pain. He was leaning against the wall next to the door in a soft blue, full-bodied costume. He had floppy ears on a hood that covered up all his wavy, blonde hair. There was black yawn for a mane and in the back Amanda could see a tail with a pink bow on it. The costume was padded; taking away from his normally, lean shape.

Emmet seemed happy enough in his extremely dorky looking costume. He grinned at Rosalie who kept cooing at how adorable he looked. His costume was padded the most with a round beige tummy and over top was a short red t-shit. His hood had tiny, round ears and his nose was painted black too.

"Ah Hah! You're Pooh!" Amanda shrieked and pointed at him and hunched over laughing at him. No one else laughed. The girls all smiled to see Amanda enjoying the moment. Jasper was less depressed when he saw Emmet had it worse than him.

"Who you callin' Poo?!" Emmet boomed, and he scooped Amanda up and tossed her in the air and caught her.

"You!" She screamed and laughed even harder, despite the horror on Esme's face as Emmet played so roughly with the human child. Emmet ticked Amanda and set her on the ground again, she stumbled drunkenly into Esme, who held her up by the elbows and tisked her playful son with a stern frown.

Amanda stifled her giggles and looked around at Esme to get a better view at her costume for the first time. It was identical to her own, but bigger and had a pouch in the front. Amanda came back to reality and found her disgust again. She moaned.

"I can't believe you are doing this to us, Alice!" Jasper picked up on some of Amanda's mood. Alice flicked at his bottom lip with her finger to remove its pout.

"Uh, Alice?" Carlisle inquired, his voice getting nearer from the end of the hallway. He appears and spread his arms to display all the feathers on his costume. "Why am I dressed as a giant bird?" he asked shyly. Everyone, even Jasper chuckled into their hands at the sight of their father. Alice skipped up to him and kissed his cheek.

"You're the wise ol' owl, Daddy," she told him with no further explanation. He didn't argue, but looked helplessly as his wife for some consoling. Amanda smacked her head with the base of her palm, missing the wound on her forehead by an inch. It was a 'Doh!' moment only Emmet understood from watching 'The Simpsons' on TV.

"Amanda?" Carlisle shifted himself to the child with concern. She removed her hand and looked him in the eye.

"This is so embarrassing," she groaned. It sounded a bit comedic and everyone laughed, except her. She was serious.

They were all dressed up at the characters from '100 Acre Woods' and Emmet was their leader, Winnie the Pooh! Alice was little Piglet, Rosalie was a very sexy version of Tigger, Jasper was a depressed Eeyore, Carlisle was the wise Owl, Esme was Momma Kanga and Amanda was baby Roo!

*

*

*

"This is mortifying!" Amanda said, using a big word she heard adults say on the television from time to time as they parked beside the fair grounds.

"Trust me, Kid. This is not mortifying! You aren't going to die from embarrassment!" Emmet winked at her, hinting.

"I might!" Amanda said thickly, frowning at him. She did want to go to the Carnival. She hadn't been the last few times it came to town and Tyler always made it sound like so much fun. However, she was very aware of how silly she looked dressed up in theme with the mysterious Cullen family.

"Oh, shush and stop grumping," Alice demanded, reaching into the back seat of the Mercedes and pulling Amanda out with her arms still crossed defiantly across her chest. "Jasper you smarten up too!" Alice pulled on the donkey's sleeve and she poked her head in Amanda's direction. He sighed and worked himself up to be more positive and to share a bit of that with the group. Amanda suddenly found the confident to take his hand and follow the group towards the fair grounds.

"Yippee!" Emmet cheered boisterously, jumping in the air, kicking his heels together. A group of kids a bit older than Amanda gave him an odd look. Amanda sighed and Jasper took her hand. He gave her an apologetic half smile and then tried to cheer her up. It seemed to work.

Once they reached the fair grounds they walked through the food area.

"Oh look! Cotton Candy! Can I have some? Please?" Amanda begged, bobbing up and down on the balls of her feet, hands clasped together pleadingly, as she gazed up at Esme. She smiled at Amanda and wanted to say yes.

"How about you eat something that is not pure sugar first and then you can have a treat?" she suggested. Esme was the youngest vampire in the family, although the oldest in appearance, so she knew more about food that had came about in the last few decades. Although, Dr Cullen knew about human nutrition, he had not eaten much in the last three centuries. He left it up to his wife to decide what Amanda could, or could not, have.

Amanda pursed her lips out like a fish and studied the carts of food to see what she could eat. "Oooo…chili cheese fries!" she exclaimed pointing to a nearby cart with a huge poster of greasy, gooey french fries covered in a meat and cheese. Amanda had always wanted to try it. They were Tyler's favorite.

"I suppose that will have to do," Esme sighed, noticing that all the other food options were just as unhealthy. Carlisle stepped up to the man at the food cart and ordered one order of the fries for Amanda and paid the man. Amanda waited patiently, but eagerly for her food.

"Grab yourself some napkins and take a seat at the picnic table, please. I will bring your food to you when it is ready," Carlisle offered. Amanda nodded and quickly did as she was told, taking a handful of white napkins from the dispenser and hurrying over the paint chipped bench. She crawled up on to her knees and sat on her bum to have a better view of the table. Alice, Esme, and Jasper sat on the opposite side and Emmet sat next to her with Rosalie on the far end.

"Here you are, Sweetheart," Carlisle announced, placing a square dish of chili covered fries in front of Amanda and taking a seat beside her on her left. Amanda was too hungry to wait. She dug in and began to munch away on the gooey, messy finger-food. She could see why Tyler liked it. It was warm, savory and covered in cheese!

"Want some?" she asked with her mouth full, trying to keep it shut as she spoke. She held up a fry dripping with chili sauce. Her fingers were all slimy, but she didn't see what the big deal was. Everyone, except for the parents made a stink face and leaned away. Esme's face even grimaced slightly through her loving smile.

"Gross!" Emmet blurted out.

"No way! It tastes very yummy!" Amanda mumbled to Emmet, still chewing a mouth load and turning to her right to face him. "Could you eat it? I mean…even if you don't need to or don't wanna?" she asked after swallowing. She remembered Carlisle eating several meals with her before they disclosed to her that they don't eat.

"I would rather die again!" Emmet said without sensor. Rosalie kicked him under the table. "Hey…what was that for?"

"Subtle," Rosalie mumbled and hid her face in her hands. The teenagers from the next table were staring at her and commenting on her good-looking figure in her tight, spandex Tigger costume.

"I'd bounce with that!" one boy said jokingly to his friends in a low voice not realizing that the Cullen's all overheard. Rosalie cringed and hid her face in Emmet's arm. She hated when even young men gawked at her and treated her as only an object of their desires. It hit too close to home for Rosalie. Her past was not a happy one. Emmet hugged her tight to him, kissed her head and then gave a fierce glare at the boys across the way. They scuffled about and all hurried away. Emmet turned back to the table. Amanda had missed the whole ordeal and was still intent on bugging him about her food.

"Ok, so, like…it bothers you when I….do…," Amanda slowed down her words in a build. "THIS?!" Amanda said sharply, poking a fry in Emmet's face, nearly touching his nose. She had an impish grin on her face as Emmet twitched away from the human food. She laughed a heartfelt laugh and then munched on the fry pleased with his response.

"Amanda, don't play with your food," Esme scolded softly with a smile so it didn't hold much weight. Amanda shrugged and continued to eat nearly the whole container of fries. When she was finished with them she licked each one of her fingers to get all the chili sauce off of them. Amanda caught Alice's horror ridden face and she beamed proudly.

"You eat like a little piglet. I think we gave you the wrong costume," she said, dabbing a napkin to a tilted bottle of water that Carlisle had also paid for and handing it to her mother as they all stood up.

"Well…I wanted to take this stupid one off, but you sewed me into it!" Amanda complained, fidgeting as Esme came up to her with the wet napkin and wiped her face. She heard snickering and saw Stacy Peterson, Ashley Talbot, and Emily Schultz standing in the middle of the courtyard. Amanda tensed and swatted Esme away, embarrassed.

The three girls were dressed as Princesses, which was popular among the young kids. Amanda looked down at her fuzzy 'Roo' costume and then to the six other 'Winnie the Pooh' characters she stood beside and felt her face heat up.

"What are you looking at Stacy?!" Rosalie sneered, stepping out from our circle and closer to the mean girls. Stacy's face fell, as did Ashley's and Emily's and they all stepped back. "That is what I thought. Now run along before I see your parents and I have that little chat with them that I warned you about," she told them ferociously. The three girls ran off in a hurry, frightened of Rosalie.

"What chat?" Alice asked curiously, hating to be out of the loops since she was usually all knowing. Rosalie smiled and winked at Amanda. Esme and Carlisle shared a suspicious glance at each other, but didn't ask. Sometimes they found it was best to stay in the dark on matters concerning their children and the mischief they got into. Usually it was Emmet, but Rosalie had a real attitude that got her in trouble from time to time.

"Oh, nothing…" she answered. Alice pouted, but not for long. She perked up when she heard the loud music and voices coming from the park.

The Cullens took Amanda to the carnival games next. Carlisle warned the boys to throw some games, and pretend to be human with imperfections, and they reluctantly agreed. Amanda tried her best to hit the pins, but even when she did hit them with the ball, her weak throw would barely make them teeter, let alone fall over. Emmet came along after her attempts and knocked all the pins down, three times in a row to win Amanda a huge, pink teddy bear.

Amanda won a rubber chicken at the ring toss and made Carlisle carry it for her as well as her pink teddy bear. She giggled at the sight of the handsome, well respected doctor dressed up as an owl, holding a rubber chicken and a huge pink bear. He smiled at her willingly and enjoyed every minute of it, trying not to be embarrassed by the looks all of his patients were giving him as they recognized him. A few waved at him and he waved back hoping to keep a shred of his dignity intact.

After the games, Amanda refused to go on any of scarier rides, not trusting that they were safe in spite of Alice's assurance she would survive them. Alice seemed to know the truth about stuff in an eerie way, but Amanda was not that trusting of the pixie girl's talents yet. Esme talked everyone into going on the Ferris wheel, and Amanda couldn't argue since it was such a slow moving ride.

Alice paired up with Jasper, who was getting a lot of 'Ooo's and Aw's' from the teenage girls in the area. Alice smiled and patted his tailed behind as he got on the ride. Rosalie and Emmet got on the next seat, Emmet so big that Rosalie practically had to sit on top of him. The conductor almost refused to let them go up like that, but he was too intimidated by Emmet, even in his Pooh Bear costume, to turn the couple away.

Carlisle held everyone's bags and Amanda's prizes and left Esme to take her granddaughter on the ride.

"Aw…Momma Kanga and baby Roo!" the ride conductor cooed, eyeing the pair as the handed him their tickets. "My little girls watch that show all the time. Cute costumes!" he continued. Amanda blushed and hurried to get on the seat, ignoring the man. Esme smiled kindly at him and thanked him and got on after Amanda.

The ride went up and Amanda pushed herself tightly into the seat and away from the edges of the car. Esme put her arm around Amanda and pulled her into her. Amanda allowed if only for safety sake.

"Are you having a good time, Honey?" Esme asked, loving every minute she spent with Amanda. It was like having Amy in her arms again. The warm, unstoppable love feeling was intense and Esme glowed with pride to be a part of Amanda's life. She was pleased with how well Amanda was handling the knowledge of their condition. Amanda knew the Cullen's were not living, technically, although she didn't truly understand the significance of that fact.

"Uh huh," Amanda said, nodding. Esme sighed and stroked Amanda's forehead lovingly, tucking a loose strand of hair back into the Kangaroo hood. Amanda decided it was a good time to ask more questions.

"So…you can't die, can you?" she asked. Esme looked down into Amanda's eyes and saw that Amanda was just curious, not afraid.

"That is correct," she responded. Amanda thought about it as the ride continued to make its way to the top as it was being loaded with other passengers.

"So…what happened to you then?"

"Well…I did die. In a sense," Esme said carefully, and quietly to Amanda so no human ears could over hear. "I thought my baby girl was gone. I feared life without her and I…I decided that I didn't want to live anymore,"

"You tried to kill yourself?" Amanda exclaimed in a whispered, shocked and extremely curious. Her stomach clenched and she felt sick for a moment at the topic they were discussing, but she wanted to know more. Esme gave a hesitant nod, her eyes off in the distance, sad.

"I tried, but I didn't die…not completely," she said softly, wistfully. Amanda didn't speak, waiting to hear more. "Carlisle found me. I was declared dead and put in the hospital morgue…that is where you go when you die…and well, he heard my heart beating when he came across my body,"

"You were still alive?" Amanda couldn't help interject. Esme didn't mind. She nodded, glad that Amanda was understanding and still not scaring from the gruesome story.

"He saved me. He gave me a second chance at happiness by bringing me into this new life," Esme cried gently. It sounded like she was crying, but Amanda saw no tears. She reached up and touched Esme's face to check. Esme smiled faintly and stroked the back of Amanda's hand. "I can't cry tears, Darling,"

"But you are sad?" Amanda asked gently, knowing the answer. The ride was full with people now and it began to spin slowly around.

"Yes," Esme whispered. "I thought your mother was dead. All these years I thought my death was justified because she was gone. Finding you alive, knowing that she had lived on and had you…well, now I know that I should never have jumped,"

Amanda gasped silently, then caught her breath.

"I am sorry, Darling. I don't mean to frighten you. You never need be afraid of me. Or my family. We all love you so very much," Amanda didn't know what to say. The word 'love' was not one she heard often and never specifically directed at her. Esme took her hand. "Will you forgive me, please? For leaving Amy without a mother? For leaving you without a Grandmother?" she asked forgiveness from Amanda. The little girl nodded quickly, reassuringly, wanting Esme to stop crying.

"You're still here, though," Amanda replied. Esme wept in silence for a short moment and then resumed composure.

"Yes, Darling. I am. I will never leave you so long as you want me in your life," she told her little granddaughter sincerely, hoping Amanda would accept.

"I do," Amanda peeped, making Esme's unbeating heart sing with joy.

*

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*

It was a long, quiet walk back to the car. The Cullen Family was all mellowed up from overhearing Esme and Amanda's little talk on the Ferris wheel. Amanda wasn't sure, but she thought they all knew about it because their behavior matched Esme's.

They piled in to the two vehicles they rode in. Amanda was squished in between Piglet and Eeyore in the back seat of the Mercedes with Owl driving and Kanga in the passenger seat. Tigger and Pooh took the Jeep home.

"Oh, wait!" Alice piped up all of a sudden on the drive home as they passed some houses with the lights on and colorful streamers decorating the front porch. "Mandi hasn't been trick or treating yet!"

"That's okay," Amanda said apathetically, tired from the chili cheese fries and cotton candy she had already consumed.

"No, you have to go to a few houses at least," Alice insisted, tapping her dad on the shoulder so he slowed the car down and pulled over. "It is tradition!"

"But..." Amanda complained, not wanting to get out of the car in her Roo costume to be humiliated further. Alice didn't take no for an answer. She got out, taking Amanda with her. Esme and Carlisle got out too, to chaperon the girls.

"I have been a good sport up to this point. However, I have my pride!" Jasper stated, leaving no room for negotiation. He looked down at the Eeyore costume he had on and frowned. "Only a little bit of pride, but none-the-less, I am drawing a firm line on this matter," he continued. Alice didn't press him. She leaned in and pecked his cheek with a kiss and then got out of the vehicle, leaving him to sit in the car. She shoved the pink pillowcase to Amanda and held one up her self.

"If you aren't going to do if for yourself, Mandi. Do it for me?" Alice begged.

"You don't eat candy, remember?" Amanda challenged. Alice grinned.

"No, but I have never been trick or treating and I have always wanted to try it! Please go with me?! You can have all my candy!" That perked Amanda up from her sulk.

"Sounds like a good deal to me!" Amanda decided with an understanding smile. Her childish love for anything chocolate taking over her pride, making Esme and Carlisle chuckle as they walked behind Alice and Amanda arms around each other's waist.

At the first house Alice rang the doorbell and then stepped back to let Amanda be front and center. The door opened and Amanda froze and then looked back to Carlisle and Esme. Carlisle whispered, "Trick or Treat?" to her as a reminder and motioned his head to the older lady waiting at the door with a bowl of candy in her hand.

"Uh…trick or…treat?" Amanda mumbled, unsure. Her mother had never taken her trick or treating, saying it had become a silly consumer holiday, as was Christmas and Easter.

"Trick or treat?" Alice sang, in a voice so beautiful the older woman's eyes got larger as she took in Alice's beauty close up. Carlisle and Esme were safely in the driveway in the dim light. The woman quickly put two tiny chocolate bars in each Alice and Amanda's pillowcases. "Thank yoooooou!" Alice sang again, turning and skipped to Esme to show her the loot. Amanda mumbled thank you and hurried to the group.

"See! Fun!" Alice said in an almost diabolical way. Amanda nodded slowly and continued on down the row of houses with Alice by her side. She got more comfortable asking for free candy after a few houses and began to enjoy it a little bit.

It got late and they had to head home after only filling a quarter of their sacks, which was plenty of candy to last Amanda for a long time if Elizabeth let her have it. She wanted to eat a chocolate bar when they all arrived back at the Lake House, but Carlisle told her that it would be up to Liz to dole it out when she saw fit and took Amanda's stash from her and locked it in his study.

Amanda tried to argue and begged for one piece of candy before bed, but since she had already eaten a whole cone of cotton candy Carlisle would not budge. He and Elizabeth seemed to always be on the same page when it came to her well being. Amanda gave up on the issue and decided not to argue with Dr Cullen anymore.

Esme undid Amanda's costume and she wiggled her self-out, happy to be free again. Then she was sent upstairs to get ready for bed. On the way to Rosalie's room a pair of arms reached out and pulled her into an adjacent bedroom on the other side of the hallway. A hand covered her mouth, before she could gasp or scream in surprise.

Emmet turned her around so she could see his face and he used his other hand to put a finger to his lips to tell her to be quiet. He let her go and quietly pulled a sack filled to the top of candy out from under Alice's bed. Amanda began to understand what was going on.

All the Cullen Kids were in the room. All of them were silent and excited to be in on the secret. Emmet and Rosalie had made a few stops on their way home as well. Emmet, in his best scare tactic, gained copious amounts of candy from homeowners not wanting to get their house egged by the gigantic teenage vampire. He winked at Amanda and handed her a Kit Kat. She smiled widely, mischievously and unwrapped it.

It tasted amazing and, oh, so sweet.

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**Trick or Treat? ^_^ Please Review! **


	20. Eating It Too

**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Twenty  
**

|Eating It Too|

One month later…

Dec 1st, 2005

"Amanda, you need to brush your teeth. I will not ask you again," Elizabeth called out to Amanda who was bouncing around on her bed listening to a Kelly Clarkson CD that Elizabeth gave her as an early birthday surprise in the morning when she had woken up. Elizabeth had let Amanda open all the presents from her that morning because she would be getting quite a few at her party. Elizabeth gave Amanda an alarm clock/CD player, a couple of brand new CD's, a new pair of winter boots, and a goose down jacket. Amanda was most thrilled about her new music player in her room. She had not turned it off since she opened the package that morning.

"I will," Amanda said and continued to jump on her bed singing along to the music playing softly from the small, black CD player on the nightstand. Amanda had been replaying the Kelly Clarkson CD all day long. It was driving Elizabeth a bit insane, but she was pleased that Amanda was happy with her gifts.

Amanda was wearing the outfit Alice had bought for her. It was a black skirt with short shorts underneath and a black, long sleeved hoodie with hot pink lining and draw strings. Elizabeth came into the room and put her hands on her hips and scolded, "Amanda! I have told you a dozen times…do not jump on your bed. Not only do you risk breaking the bed, you could break your neck! It is dangerous!"

"No it isn't. I am being careful!" Amanda argued, still bouncing mildly.

"Off the bed!….Now!" Elizabeth demanded. Her tone meant business. "And put your socks on. It is too cold for you to wear that outfit without them," Elizabeth added, pointing to the black and hot pink striped knee socks lying on the floor. She pressed the off switch on the CD player.

"Awww," Amanda whined, stopping her movement. She did a bum drop down on her bed and then bounced off to the rug and crawled to her socks to slip them on.

"The guests are going to be arriving soon and you have to be ready to greet them when they come,"

"Why can't you greet them?" Amanda asked being difficult. Elizabeth gave her a strong, stern look.

"They are your guests, Amanda. This is your special day and it is up to you to greet all the guests when they arrive and then thank them kindly for coming when it is time for them to leave,"

"Fine," Amanda agreed as she pulled her socks up to her knees, one after the other.

"I know you are excited, Darling. Please try to behave like a young lady, regardless. Your manners are not allowed to go out the window just because it is your birthday," Elizabeth reminded Amanda.

"I know that!"

"Good. Well then…you finish up in here. I want you to make your bed up so it looks nice and neat and then go brush your teeth,"

"Okay," Amanda agreed with a sigh. She hopped up from the floor with her socks pulled up to her knees. Elizabeth left her alone to complete the tasks she'd laid out. Amanda put her music back on and danced and sang along with Kelly's voice as she made her bed. Then she ran to the bathroom and quickly brushed her teeth and combed her hair. She put a few simple braids in her hair and tied each one with a pink elastic at the end. Afterward, Amanda hurried back into her room to turn off her music player before joining Elizabeth in the kitchen who was happy to see Amanda had obeyed.

Elizabeth was adding the final touches to the birthday cake she had made for Amanda. A triple layered, chocolate fudge cake with pink icing. She wrote 'Happy ninth Birthday, Amanda' on the surface with melted dark chocolate and set it inside the fridge to harden the lettering.

"Oh, wonderful. You're ready. I need you to help set the table, please. Put one of these plates on each place setting at the table and one cup to go with them. I will set the cutlery and napkins," Elizabeth requested, handing a pile of hot pink, paper plates to Amanda who took them carefully in one hand with a stack of hot pink paper cups in her other hand. Amanda did as she was told, standing on her tiptoes to reach and slide the plate into their designated setting. Then she rounded the table and put one cup by each plate.

There was a knock at the door. Amanda smiled and ran to the door recognizing the knock. It was Tyler's signature knock of three quick knocks, a pause and then two more knocks. She unlocked the door and pulled it open excitedly. There stood Tyler and his mother.

"Come in, Ty!" Amanda said bluntly and pulled on Tyler's wrist to haul him into the room. Elizabeth walked up and greeted Mrs Davis properly. Both women laughed at Amanda's greeting as the kids ran off to her bedroom so Amanda could show Tyler her new CD regardless of whether he wanted to hear Kelly Clarkson or not.

*

*

*

"So…what do you think? Isn't she great?" Amanda asked, passing the CD case of Kelly Clarkson's album, 'Breakaway' to Tyler as they jumped up and down on her bed. Elizabeth and Mrs Davis were chatting lightly at the front door. Tyler looked at the cover and shrugged. The music was loudly playing on Amanda's CD player and Tyler didn't care for it. Amanda grabbed the case back, insulted by his lack of enthusiasm.

"She's alright, I guess," Tyler stated, hoping to rectify the situation. Amanda stopped jumping; her twin braids came to rest behind her back. She didn't know how to respond. "You're just as good as she is," Tyler added quickly, his cheeks turning pink. Amanda crinkled her nose and shoved Tyler a bit.

"I am not! You're just saying that to try and make me feel good!"

"No I'm not. That is what I really think!" Tyler argued, shoving Amanda back. Then Amanda and Tyler both laughed at the same time, breaking the tension. Amanda tossed the CD gently to the carpet so she could start bouncing on the bed again. Amanda thought Tyler was only being a suck up, but she decided to take his compliment whether or not it was his true opinion.

"Here. Hold my hands and on the count of three we will turn and switch sides!" Amanda declared, taking Tyler's hands in hers. "One…" Amanda said as the jumped up and down. "Two…three!"

Amanda and Tyler jumped at the same time and in the air rotated one hundred and eighty degrees. They giggled and did it again. And again! Then the last time, on the count of three Tyler slipped and fell to the bed pulling Amanda down as well. There was no time to reach out and stop herself, Amanda fell head first off the bed. She smacked her forehead on her night table with so much force the CD skipped in the player. The music resumed right away. Then she rolled to the floor and clutched her head in her hands and grimaced in silence.

"Amanda! Are you okay?" Tyler gasped, sliding off the bed and to the floor by her side. She rubbed her head and gulped back tears. She didn't like to show weakness if she could help it. Plus, she didn't want to get in trouble for disobeying Elizabeth. She nodded and rubbed away the throb.

"Hold on. I will get Elizabeth!" Tyler suggested, wanting to get help.

"No!" Amanda said, grabbing Tyler's wrist and stopping him as he got up to leave. "You can't. She would kill me!" It was a large exaggeration, but Amanda had already been warned not to jump on her bed. If Elizabeth found out she got hurt doing so she would be in more trouble.

"You sure?" Tyler asked, not feeling very good about what happened. It was partly his fault for pulling her down when he fell instead of letting go of Amanda's hands.

"Yeah, it is not a big deal. It doesn't hurt that bad," Amanda justified as she released the pressure of her palm on her hairline on the right side of her forehead. It was almost the same place she had a thin, almost healed, scar from when she had climbed the bookcase at the Cullen's house a month earlier. When Elizabeth had returned home to find Amanda with stitches in her head she was not pleased with Amanda for snooping around in Dr Cullen's study. Amanda was grounded from television for a couple of days until the sutures had been removed.

"Is it noticeable?" Amanda asked Tyler leaning her head to him. She was hopeful she had no mark to show for this accident or Elizabeth would be upset with her. Amanda didn't think Elizabeth would cancel her party, but she didn't want to give her the incentive.

"Um…" Tyler thought, zeroing in on Amanda's head and leaning closer. He squinted through his glasses and then shook his head. "Not really. It is a little bit pink. Maybe we should just tell Eliz-,"

"No. It is fine," Amanda cut him off and stood up.

"Okay, but it is going to show!" Tyler said clearly.

"Ah, crap!" Amanda said and she got up and bent over her dresser to look in the mirror. It was not really that easy to see since it was right on the hairline, but there was a bit of a pink patch starting to form. Amanda heard the doorbell ring just vaguely through the continuous music that was playing in her room. Amanda had to act fast. She pulled at the front strands of her hair that was neatly braided into her pigtail braids until they came loose and hung in her face a bit. It helped to cover her forehead.

"Don't say a word!" She demanded of her best friend. Tyler agreed by not saying anything.

Amanda ran to her nightstand, pushed the off button on her CD Player and then ran to the door and into the hallway. Elizabeth was already on her way to her room to tell her about the door, but when she saw Amanda she retreated back to party preparation. Amanda hurried to the door and stopped for a second to straighten her outfit, for Alice's sake, and stroke the stands of hair in her face to make sure they were covering. Then she took a breath and opened the door.

The Cullen Family stood on the front steps. Esme and Carlisle were in front and all four teenagers behind them. Alice poked her head out from behind Carlisle and smiled excitedly. She was holding onto a rolled up sleeping bag in one hand and a pillow in the other, loving her 'props' too much. The Cullen girls were sleeping over after the party. Rosalie had the same props, but she was not bouncing around like Alice. Rosalie had brought her entire beauty collection to make over Amanda with when the other guest had gone home.

"Come in….uh…please," Amanda said in her best effort to be polite. She was not sure how to play hostess having never seeing it done by her own mother or Donna Combs. Elizabeth had not had company over since Cole's death either, so Amanda had very little experience with this sort of thing.

"Thank you, Amanda. Happy Birthday," Carlisle told her, allowing Esme to walk in before he did.

"Happy Birthday, Darling," Esme cooed lovingly, bending down to Amanda as she entered. She stroked Amanda's hair and went to kiss her on the head. Esme stopped right before she did so and retreated, doing a double take on Amanda. She brushed some of the hair away from Amanda's forehead and then her face fell in concern. "Oh dear Heavens! What has happened to your head?" she softly asked studying Amanda's pink mark, that was rising in a round welt on her forehead.

"Nothing!" Amanda quickly answered, squirming out of Esme's hold and pulling the hair back on her face. Tyler came up next to her and stood meekly. Alice tisked Amanda playfully with a wag of her dainty finger.

"You should have listened to Liz!" Alice sang out with a smile. She gave Amanda a hug and added with a whisper, "I would have called to warn you, but I since you were not going to seriously injure yourself I thought it would be better to teach you a lesson about jumping on beds!"

"Oh, gee thanks, Alice!" Amanda replied sarcastically. Amanda had sort of guessed that Alice was a psychic by this time, but they never openly discussed the fact with anyone, not sure if it was a secret or not. Alice giggled, as did Jasper and Emmet. Tyler was uncomfortable standing alone so he backed away and went into the living room to sit and wait.

"Haven't you heard that song about the monkeys?" Emmet asked boisterously. "You're not supposed to jump on the bed!" he added, stroking his index fingers 'for shame' at her.

"Yes, I have heard it, and I know!" Amanda said impatiently, not wanting a lecture from the Cullen's now too. "Anyway…" Amanda carried on in practically a whisper; "I put a small bag under each one of the chair cushions at the table for you to put your food into. Tyler stares at his food when he eats so he won't notice if you decide to dump your food into the bags, but you have to watch out for Liz,"

"Nice!" Emmet cheered and grinned at Amanda appreciatively. The others smiled in gratitude as well.

"Just do me a favor in return and don't mention this to Liz," Amanda bargained, pointing to her forehead. Esme and Carlisle shared a thoughtful glance of uncertainty. "Please? It is my birthday!" she begged, clasping her hands together.

"No more jumping on the bed," Carlisle agreed with a stern, but kind warning. Amanda complied with a couple of quick nods.

"Good monkey!" Emmet said and patted the crown of Amanda's head for fun. Amanda was about to tackle him back, as she often did. She knew he could not be hurt. She liked to rough house with Emmet despite Esme's wishes.

"Hello, Carlisle. Esme," Elizabeth showed up all of a sudden in the small foyer. Amanda's eyes widened and she stopped herself from pouncing on Emmet.

Carlisle's outreached his arms and he embraced Elizabeth for a supportive hug. He and Esme were her closest friends and confidants now that she was left widowed. Esme stepped up and she did the same when Carlisle let go of Elizabeth. The two women were starting to be good friends. They got along very well and they both had Amanda's best interest at heart so they had a lot in common.

"Thank you for coming. May I take your coats and hang them up?" Elizabeth asked and they agreed, peeling off their unnecessary layers of outwear designed for shielding the cold they could not feel.

"You can put your stuff in my room!" Amanda announced proudly, pointing Alice and Rosalie down the hall. She had never had a sleepover before. No one had ever invited her to his or her home and she had never had a safe place to invite friends over to in return. Tyler's mom didn't allow him to have sleepovers so this was a first for Amanda.

After a few minutes the greetings were done, people's jackets were hung up, and everyone had gathered in the living room to chat. It was not too much longer when the pizza arrived. The Cullen's all stifled their disgust when the announcement was made that it was time to eat!

*

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*

An hour later, after a very successful meal...meaning the humans ate and the Cullens pretended to eat, everyone got together to play party games. Amanda wasn't surprised that when they played 'Pin the Tail on the Donkey', most of the Cullen's were right on target. However, Carlisle and Esme did a more convincing job of playing up human imperfections and got their tails on the wall next the poster on purpose. Tyler pinned his tail on the donkey's eye and Amanda was closer, but not as close as Emmet's perfectly pinned tail in the center of the Donkey's bum.

Next they played 'Hot Potato'. Elizabeth played Amanda's new Kelly Clarkson CD, cringing a few times because she was starting to know the lyrics by this time. As the potato went around in a circle, people got kicked out. Alice won all three rounds of the game, not being able to help knowing when the music would stop and averting the potato at those times. Tyler commented on how quick she was, but no one acknowledged his observation seriously.

After a few more games and all the prizes were handed out, it was time to open presents. Amanda hadn't expected to feel so shy about that part of her birthday party. She had been so excited to be getting presents when she had thought about it the night before, but now she was uncomfortable with all the attention. She opened the first one slowly, her hands shaking. She didn't know why it was so hard for her to accept the gifts. They were from friends, after all. She didn't feel worthy of all the kindness. She didn't like the feeling of vulnerability she had when she was given something and had nothing to give in return.

Rosalie had given her a large box with four outfits inside. Alice rambled on about how each would compliment Amanda's eye color, or skin tone until Esme gently pulled her aside and suggested she take a breather. Then Alice rebounded and gave Amanda tickets to a Kelly Clarkson concert coming to Vancouver in the spring and explained that she knew Amanda would love to go! She was correct, of course. Amanda was thrilled, letting her apprehensions slide as she jumped up to hug Alice for her gift.

Tyler's mom made him get Amanda an educational gift. Some classic books; 'Anne of Green Gables', 'The Story of Dr Dolittle', 'The Chronicles of Narnia,' 'The Little House' box set, and 'Little Woman' and 'Little Men'. Amanda thanked him sincerely. She liked to read and didn't have a very big collection of books of her own. She gave him a hug to thank him as well. Tyler blushed and Rosalie nudged Emmet thinking it was adorable how shy he was. Amanda noticed the nudge and glared at Rosalie to stop. She did, but continued to smile at Tyler who was staring at the ground awkwardly now.

Emmet and Jasper also gave Amanda a bit of, what they thought of as, a lame gift. A skater's helmet, elbow pads, knee pads and wrist guards. It was the gift that they had been assigned to get Amanda to go along with what Amanda really wanted, but never told anyone what she wished for. Alice knew…as usual.

The best gift of all was not inside the house. Dr Cullen took Amanda outside to show her the gift he and Esme had brought for her. It was resting on its kickstand on the driveway with a big, hot pink bow on the handlebars. Amanda's mouth fell open and she flew down the front steps and to the bike to take a better look.

"It's perfect!" she exclaimed, touching the black, leather seat and then the handlebars. The bike frame was black with hot pink and silver metallic designs swirled into the paint job. Amanda forgot for a moment that she had people watching her and she got on the bike to see how it felt. It was a bit big for her, but she would still be able to ride it now and for years to come as she grew. Amanda had always wanted a bike of her own.

"Uh uh ah…" Elizabeth reprimanded kindly, stepping forward with a black helmet in her hand. She passed it to Amanda who was already sitting on the bike with the kickstand down. "This goes with it and I am not joking around, Amanda. If I ever catch you riding without a helmet on I will take away the bike. Do you understand me?"

"Yes! Yes! Okay!" Amanda answered quickly, plopping the trendy, skateboarding helmet on her head to try it on for size.

"And no riding on the road. The traffic is painfully slow in Kipta, but I still don't want you to be in the line of cars," Elizabeth added. Amanda agreed fully, beaming with excitement to start riding her bike. Elizabeth turned back to Carlisle and Esme and smiled. They were so happy that Amanda liked their gift. "Alright, come inside now. You don't even have shoes on. You can ride your bike some other time," Elizabeth added.

Amanda reluctantly did as she was told, and got off the bike and ran over to Esme and smacked into her to give her a hug. The helmet gave a little cracking sound that made the Cullens chuckle a bit. When Esme let her go, Amanda spun around to Carlisle and stepped toward him awkwardly and less exuberantly wrapped her arms around his waist. She looked up at him and smiled.

"Thank you," she told him.

*

*

*

After the gifts, it was getting to be evening and time for cake. Amanda loved chocolate so when Elizabeth asked her what kind of special cake she wanted for her birthday Amanda told her everything chocolate, but with strawberry frosting. Elizabeth had done what Amanda asked and once again everyone was seated at the table again for dessert. Elizabeth walked into the dining room with the round cake lit with nine candles glowing on top of it.

"Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday, dear Amanda…Happy birthday to you!" Everyone sang. Tyler gawked at Rosalie the whole time, his eyes nearly popping out of his head at the sound of her lovely voice. Amanda was noticing the same thing from her left side where Alice sat next to her. Emmet was on her right side chanting at Amanda to "Make a wish"!

Amanda struggled to think of a good wish and finally closed her eyes and decided on one. _'I wish that this will last forever!'_ she thought, picturing her new, slightly odd family made up of Elizabeth, Tyler and the Cullens. She opened her eyes, sucked in a deep breath and blew at the candles. Most went out, but one flickered and continued to flame when as she ran out of wind.

"That was weak!" Emmet bellowed, ribbing Amanda for her pathetic attempt. "So…who's your boyfriend?" he added, craning his neck to look at Tyler.

"I don't have a boyfriend!" Amanda replied, horrified and embarrassed. The adults at the table chuckled thinking it was adorable to see her blush. Tyler stared at his lap, blushing a bit as well. It didn't take Amanda long to retaliate. She ducked her head under the table briefly and pulled the fresh bag she had put under Emmet's seat for round two. She had replaced everyone's bag when Elizabeth was in the kitchen after the last meal. Now, Amanda tucked Emmet's bag under her seat and sat up again. Elizabeth had been too busy cutting the cake to notice her disappear under the table for a few seconds. Emmet clued in to what Amanda was up to, but not before it was too late.

"Liz, Emmet says he wants a BIG piece!" Amanda announced with a cheeky grin on her face. "He loves chocolate cake!"

Emmet looked like someone had punched him in the gut and it hurt. It was the closest to a 'deer in the headlights' look that Amanda had ever seen as Elizabeth took this request and placed a humongous chunk of chocolate cake in front of Emmet's setting.

"Of course. Growing boys need more to eat. Enjoy, Emmet!" Elizabeth responded kindly. "Jasper, would you like a big piece too?" she asked, not wanting to exclude him.

"Jasper is allergic to chocolate!" Amanda said sweetly, giving Jasper an out because he was always good to her and made her laugh. Jasper bowed his head gratefully to Amanda and then beamed a huge, satisfied grin at Emmet who looked like he was going to be sick.

"Really?" Elizabeth questioned, standing a bit straighter. She looked to Carlisle for confirmation of this information.

"Uh…yes. He has a very mild aversion to cocoa. However, it is probably best he doesn't have any cake just to be on the safe side," Dr Cullen forced himself to lie, not liking it one bit, but he had no choice.

"I wish I had known. I would have made something especially for you, Jasper," Elizabeth offered her sympathy. Jasper smiled. "Would you like me to check and see what else I have in the form of dessert?"

"That is thoughtful of you, Elizabeth, Thank you. I am perfectly content right now. I don't need anything else," he responded. Jasper was elated and couldn't help spread the feeling. Amanda and Alice giggled and the room lit up with happiness again. Except for Emmet, who was forced to take a few bites of cake for show when Elizabeth asked him how he liked the cake.

"Mmmmm….Best. Cake. Ever!" he said with as much sincerity as he could muster, rubbing his hand over his stomach in a circular movement as he spoke with a mouthful. He gave a big, fake grin and a thumb up as he forced himself to chew and swallow a bite of the cake. Amanda laughed and Emmet glared at her when Elizabeth started up a conversation with Carlisle and Esme.

*

*

*

After eating cake, and Emmet being excused to use the restroom, Amanda helped tidy the table while Elizabeth spoke to Esme in the living room. Carlisle watched on from the dining room, enjoying seeing his wife and good friend and co-worker getting alone so well. He was also glad to see Elizabeth smile again. It had been a rough four weeks for her since she got home from Alberta.

"Did you already throw away your…cake?" Amanda asked, tapping Dr Cullen on the arm to get his attention. She was going around and collecting the bags filled with cake the Cullens had used. He broke from his thoughts and faced Amanda and nodded.

"Yes, Sweetheart. Thank you," he responded. "That was quite the trick you played on Emmet. I won't say he didn't have it coming, but I don't like to hear you lie for our benefit. Jasper is quite thrilled to have this new excuse to get out of anything cocoa related in the future, but please don't think you have to cover for us. That is not your job,"

"Ya…okay," Amanda agreed, but she smiled thinking of Emmet forced to eat cake. Carlisle couldn't help himself. He brushed the hair out of Amanda's face and with the other hand he tilted her chin up to take a better look at her bruised forehead. Amanda rolled her eyes away from the doctor's eyeline. He gave a short, quiet laugh at her sarcasm, but continued his exam of her head.

"You really should be icing this. It would help to reduce the swelling and keep it from bruising as noticeably," he offered his medical opinion and then let her chin go. Amanda shrugged apathetically.

"Too late! It will be a purple bruise by tonight regardless of what she does with it now!" Alice chirped joining them in the dining room with absolute certainty. Amanda hushed her and peeked out toward the living room where Elizabeth was to make sure she had not overheard. She and Esme were still chatting and laughing about something or other.

Carlisle sighed and let the topic go. He didn't want to make waves for Amanda on her birthday. He wished she would get out of the habit of lying, but he knew that this was not the time to lecture her. It was nearly time for them to head out anyway.

Tyler's mom came and had to practically drag him away from playing a game of Risk with Jasper. It was looking like Tyler was winning, which was a new thing for Jasper, who normally excelled over the rest in that particular game. Rosalie and Emmet had played as well, but both were kicked off the board by Tyler and Jasper's thoughtful strategies.

"Goodnight, Amanda. Happy birthday," Esme said as she and Carlisle were at the door dressed to go out in the cold, December air again.

"Thank you for coming," Amanda replied politely, letting Esme give her a warm hug. Alice and Rosalie sat on the sofa and waved goodbye to their parents.

"Have fun, girls. Don't keep Amanda up too late," Esme reminded them.

"Bye, Mom. Love you," Alice and Rosalie replied in unison. Esme blow them each a kiss and then walked out the door. Jasper had already said his goodbyes and was in the car, pretending to warm it up for his family. Emmet waited for a moment, rocking on his heals mischievously as he put his coat on.

"Happy birthday, Monkey!" he joked picking Amanda up for a hug. He placed her down again and pointed to her forehead. "Hey…what is that? It looks like you bumped your head!"

Amanda's froze not knowing what to say. Elizabeth was standing behind her and turned her around by the shoulder and gasped, taking a closer look. Emmet snickered. "Oops!" He said with a smile. It was his way of getting her back for the cake. Amanda threw a glare at him as he waved and bounded out in to the dark night. Elizabeth ran her hands up Amanda's face to hold her still so she could take a closer look.

"Oh my goodness! You have a goose egg on your head. How…? When?" she asked, stunned that she was out of the loop. The bump was a soft purple color now and could be seen at only certain angles. Elizabeth knew it would of have to hurt to get such a lump. She was concerned at first, but then her eyes narrowed and she studied Amanda carefully wanting the truth.

"I…fell," Amanda admitted with a shrug. Elizabeth looked to Carlisle, who was holding the door; he was the last to leave.

"You fell?" Elizabeth pressed for more information sensing Amanda was leaving out something.

"I fell off the bed," Amanda conceded.

"While you were jumping on it?" Elizabeth asked, disappointed.

"Yes…" Amanda mumbled, looking outside to spot Emmet and give him another nasty look if she could.

"It is not serious, Liz. It only looks bad because of how many blood vessels line the forehead. She will be fine," Carlisle did his best to smooth over the situation. "You could ice it to bring the swelling down if it is causing her pain, but there is not much more you can do to reduce bruising now,"

Elizabeth sighed and nodded, letting Amanda go. She didn't want to be rude to the guests by making a scene. "Have a nice evening Carlisle. Thank you again for coming and for your generosity," she told him, seeing him out the door. She nudged Amanda to say goodbye and thank you.

"Goodbye. Thank you, Dr Cullen," Amanda said softly.

"Bye Dad!" Alice sang.

"Good bye, girls. Be good!" he told his daughters. Rosalie and Alice nodded. Then he bowed his head down to Amanda and added teasingly, "No more jumping on the bed!"

"Yes, Sir," Amanda agreed unwillingly. He smiled and Elizabeth closed the door behind him as he left. She turned to Amanda and gave her a silent stare. Amanda shrugged, not knowing what else to do in her position. She couldn't take anything back now. "I won't do it again. I promise," she added. Elizabeth agreed.

"I am glad to see you have learned your lesson. It is too bad it took a bump on the head and Dr Cullen's orders for you to finally see my point!"

"I'm sorry," Amanda whispered. Elizabeth sighed and pulled Amanda into her and hugged her. She then kissed Amanda on the head and let her go join her friends.

*

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*

The evening continued on. Elizabeth set the three girls up in the living room with a movie and popcorn that only Amanda munched on. Elizabeth went to her room to give them their privacy. Alice painted Amanda's toes pink and Rosalie came along afterwards when they had dried and delicately drew on tiny white cherry blossoms. Alice showed Amanda what french tips were when she painted her finger nails. Amanda liked how it looked and happily let the teenage girls make her over.

Then, when it got too late and Amanda could hardly hold her head up, Alice and Rosalie shifted things over to Amanda's room and set up for 'sleep'. They played cards on Amanda's bed for a while. Alice promised not to cheat. When the human child began to drift off, Rosalie tucked her into her bed and turned off the lights. She and Alice could still see in the dark.

It was a whole year after the death of her mother, and the first time Amanda went to bed without thinking about that tragic day. Amanda struggled to stay awake by talking to Alice and Rosalie, but it was almost laughable because she stopped making sense and mumbled about Emmet and the cake for a while before she became silent. At a quarter to midnight she was passed out in a deep sleep of happy, birthday bliss and Alice and Rosalie stayed awake in the dark, playing Gin Rummy and talking about the future.

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**Review Please!**


	21. Unhappy Holidays

**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Twenty-One**

|Unhappy Holidays|

A few weeks later….

This would be the first year that Christmas would come to the Cullen household in full force. The Cullen family had given up on celebrating, because it was a tough time of year for the eldest teen girl. Rosalie's 'accident' had occurred over the holiday season so many years ago. She didn't like to talk about it, but every year around Christmas time she became short tempered and angry.

She had been better the last several decades at hiding her feelings. The Cullen's had come to nearly forget the reasons why they did not celebrate the season. It had just become a part of how they lived. Rosalie thought that she could avoid Christmas festivities forever.

However, this year the difference in their lives was Amanda, and the little girl was starting to become close with the Cullen family. Esme insisted, seeing as Amanda was her granddaughter, that they spend as much time with her as they were able. None of the Cullens could deny her that wish. Rosalie, even though she had grown fond of the little girl, did not like to be reminded of how she herself was not a human. Or, that she would never grow older, have a job, kids, grandkids, or retire to watch her family grow and expand. Being with Amanda so often was a scary thing for her to deal with. And at this time of year Rosalie was finding it harder to be around the child without thinking about her past and the life she had wanted and would never get.

The rest of the family was actually looking forward to being a part of the traditions this year. Esme had a whole meal planned for Christmas Eve and had invited Elizabeth and Amanda over for the evening. It was not ideal, seeing as the Cullens had to hide their true nature from Elizabeth, but they didn't mind. They wanted Esme to be happy. Besides, having Amanda in their lives was important to not only Esme, but the rest of the family as well.

Rosalie didn't have the heart to tell them how she felt. That she didn't want to bring Christmas into the Cullen house. She kept her mouth shut and tried to be a good sport about all the planning for decorations and parties and presents for Amanda from Santa. You name it, the Cullens were doing it full force this year.

It was the last day of classes for students before Christmas break. Alice loved the decorations and the cheer that was going around the school atmosphere. Jasper was in good spirits as well. Emmet was, as usual, distracted by the pretty lights and didn't care what else was going on. Rosalie, on the other hand, was not impressed.

"Won't this day ever end?" Rosalie grunted as the four Cullen teens strolled to their classes for the last day of the 2005 school year. Emmet rubbed her shoulder and then kissed her quickly to comfort her.

"Aw, come on Babe. It is not so bad. One more class and we're done!" Emmet reminded her. She rolled her eyes. "At least you don't have gym. We're doing square dancing today again. And I still can't get the steps right!"

"Aw…it is easy, Em!" Alice piped up. She was twirling a piece of her black hair around her finger and then let it go to flick out the back of her head. Of course, dancing came naturally to Alice. She was the family's tiny dancer. Emmet looked way down at her eager for good news.

"So, I will get it this time?" he asked hopefully. Alice froze and then told him the truth with a wide-eyed expression that said, 'Sorry, Bro' without having to literally say the words out loud. Emmet's face fell. Alice shrugged and patted him on his forearm since should couldn't reach his shoulder very well.

"Hey, Rosalie. I thought it would be fun to have Amanda over for a sleepover tonight. I already told her about it and Esme agreed as well. Won't that be fun?" Alice said in an attempt to cheer her sister up. Normally, Rosalie liked spending time with Amanda.

"Whatever!" Rosalie heaved a sigh and marched away without a goodbye. There was a poster on the wall that read, 'Tis the Season to be Jolly' on it. Rosalie looked from right to left to see who was watching. When the coast was clear she ripped it off the wall with a swift grab and let the crumpled board fall to the hallway floor.

"Well, that wasn't very festive!" Alice stated. Jasper was standing next to Alice and he decided to let the others in on Rose's feelings a bit. He didn't like to betray confidence, but he thought it might help Alice and Emmet to understand.

"She is hurting inside. Just give her some space and tolerance," Jasper explained. Emmet nodded, looking sadly at the hallway where the poster lay on the floor. He knew how Rosalie had come into this life. How she had been beaten and brutally raped and left for dead before Carlisle had found her and 'saved' her. Alice knew just a few details, but it was only the basics and none of them ever talked about it with Rosalie. It was a forbidden topic in the Cullen household. Rosalie never brought it up, either.

The others all parted way to head to their last classes of the day. Emmet soon lost sight of Rosalie's problems. He was too busy trying to square dance in gym class. He was too big and couldn't fit under his partner's arms. He had problems of his own.

Alice and Jasper went to their History class and soon were absorbed in their own blissful, happiness. Jasper loved History class. He was the know-it-all of that particular subject and loved to discuss war tactics with the other students and teacher. Alice always loved to watch Jasper debate and enjoy himself. So they too forgot to worry about how Rosalie was doing in her English class.

Rosalie was not paying attention to the teacher's speech on 'Oedipus Rex', the novel they had just read in the last few weeks. She had read it too many times before and hated repetition. So, to pass the time, Rosalie scratched angrily at her notepad with a pencil, drawing a man with a stake through his heart. She detailed the blood to pour out of his chest, nose and mouth and because of her many years of practice; she was amazing at real life drawings. The doodle had turned into a nearly photographic quality. She almost smiled in wicked pleasure, but she was too absorbed in her rage to notice the teacher standing over her. Suddenly the paper flew out from under her pencil.

"Rosalie, would you like to explain this?" Mr Humphrey demanded in a loud, annoyed tone. He was under the assumption the man in the drawing was him. And it did look somewhat like him. It was a sketch of an average good-looking man in his mid thirties with medium colored hair in a sweater vest and slacks. It was, however, just a random guy who looked an awful lot like one of the men that had hurt Rosalie eighty years ago. Rosalie was not up to being polite to her teacher. She was in a foul mood. She dropped her pencil in her notebook and looked up at him.

"Not really," she responded to his question. His face got red with rage.

"Pack up your things and follow me!" he bellowed and tried to scare Rosalie with his best, 'you're in big trouble' tone. Rosalie didn't show any remorse. She folded her notebook closed and stood up with it under her arm and held her hand out to the door for him to walk ahead of her. This made him even angrier with her for giving him directions.

"This is serious, Miss Cullen. Let's see what the principal has to say about this artwork of yours. I think you will find she will be appalled with the inappropriate, graphic nature of it!" he prattled as they walked towards the office. Rosalie bit her tongue. So many words she would love to say were trying to pry their way out from her lips.

They entered the office and without knocking Mr Humphrey opened Ms Hanik's door and barged in. She was alone, but startled from his entrance. She spilled coffee down her shirt. She was a large, older woman who had not aged gracefully and took out her misplaced jealously for her faded youth on the students of Kipta High. She had a special hate on for Rosalie, but had never had a good reason to discipline the gorgeous teenage girl before. Ms Hanik's eyes lit up a bit when she saw who Mr Humphrey was bringing into her office.

"What is this all about?" she asked, eyeing Rosalie up and down. Mr Humphrey practically threw the graphic, horror sketch at the principal to view. She took it and her slits for eyes opened a crack more when she saw the drawing.

"What is the meaning of this, Miss Cullen?" She asked Rosalie. She shooed Mr Humphrey away with a hand gesture. He huffed and slammed the door behind him mumbling about suspension as he left. "Well? What do you have to say for yourself?" Ms Hanik repeated herself.

"It's art! I think the detail work is rather well done, don't you?" Rosalie replied with a smile. Ms Hanik slammed the paper down on her desk. Rosalie didn't flinch.

"I'm calling your mother!" The principal stated. That got Rosalie's attention. She had not considered that outcome. Esme and Carlisle were always displeased to be called in when one of their children was misbehaving. They stressed the importance of fitting in and not making a scene. Having your mother called into school was most definitely a scene.

"No, please, Ms Hanik. I am sorry. I am truly sorry. I am having a bad day and I was just venting my emotions through artful expression. I did not mean to cause a disturbance. I don't even have a record. It will never happen again. I can assure you," Rosalie begged, standing and leaning into Ms Hanik for emphasis.

It usually was her musical voice, her stunning facial features, her long, golden hair, or her magnificent body that had humans obey her every whim. However, Ms Hanik was the wrong person to flaunt these attributes in front of. She was a bitter woman with very little in her life to make her happy.

"Have a seat, Miss Cullen. And we will discuss this more when your mother arrives. Let's see what she makes of your artistic talent," Mrs Hanik said with glee and she picked up the phone. She waited until Rosalie sat down to dial. Rosalie slouched and crossed her arms across her chest and fumed. She decided to wait and play it out. She knew Esme would be on her side.

*

*

*

"LIZ!" Amanda screamed out loudly as she ran into the glass door of the medical office, pushing it open. She was overly excited. It was Friday, the last day of school for the year. She was on Christmas Holidays now until after New Years. And she had plans to sleepover at the Cullen's with Alice, her now official, best friend. Life was looking up for Amanda.

Elizabeth was at her desk, writing a transcript for one of the patients. As soon as the door flung open and she simultaneously heard her name being screeched, Elizabeth jumped and her hand scratched the pen across the page and her glasses slid down her nose. She had been wearing them more often lately since her contacts irritated her eyes and her prescription was not so high that she couldn't remove her glasses every now and then. She pushed them back into place on her nose and watched Amanda come barreling in.

"Amanda!" Elizabeth gasped, horrified and quite upset with the mark on the document she was filling out. It was ruined and would have to be redone. Amanda stopped at the side of the desk and threw her bag down underneath it. Almost two months had passed since Cole's funeral and Elizabeth was still vulnerable, but she hid a lot of her pain from Amanda.

Besides the obvious pain of loving her beloved husband, Elizabeth was functioning well and able to keep Amanda in her custody. She found it a blessing in a way to have the little girl in her life now. Elizabeth was a very loving, maternal being and she had once focused on taking care of her late husband, Cole. Now that she was widowed, Elizabeth put all her love into being a good parent to Amanda, making sure to love her and discipline her when she needed it.

Things were getting back to a steady rhythm. After school Amanda was to come check in at the office and do homework if she had any. Tyler sometimes came too. If they had no homework or finished it quickly, Elizabeth allowed them to go across the street to the soda shop, the park, or to Tyler's house until dinnertime. Amanda was always eager to go find Tyler after she got to the clinic. Today was no exception.

"What?" the child asked, not understanding Elizabeth's tone of frustration. She was panting from running all the way from school to the clinic. Her cheeks were pink from the cold wind outside.

"How many times do I have to tell you? This is a place of business. You have to keep a low profile. That means no shouting and crashing in here like you own the place," Elizabeth said quietly, but firmly. Amanda was still breathing heavy, working on catching her breath. She had her mouth open and she nodded along with her foster mother's word to appease her.

"Sorry," Amanda apologized briefly in a whisper and she held up a crumpled paper in her hand. Elizabeth saw it and realized it was Friday. The last day of classes for each week, Amanda's class had a spelling test.

"Hey! How did your test go today?" Elizabeth asked, seeing the paper. Her mood lightened and she pushed her work aside for the time being. There was no use dwelling on the large ink line across Mr Johnson's patient transcripts. She would start over once she spent a few minutes with Amanda. Elizabeth put the child first in her life now.

She was planning on adopting Amanda if social services came through with the papers. The process was taking a long time. She had met with a number of members of the state child services and she was not finished jumping through hoops to become Amanda's permanent primary guardian. Elizabeth had not yet told Amanda…in case something didn't pan out and her request was denied.

"Here," Amanda said, closing her mouth and breathing through her nose. She passed that morning's spelling test to Elizabeth. She heard a door open and turned her head to look down the hallway. Carlisle smiled and walked up to where Amanda stood and put his hand on her head. She reached to brush it away, but smiled when he removed it before she could touch his hand.

"Great job!" Elizabeth praised Amanda for her spelling test. She was doing remarkably well in school since Elizabeth's return from Alberta. Amanda's teacher, Mrs Brightman, had noticed her improvement and had called Elizabeth last week to talk about how much better she was doing at concentrating in class and completing her assignments. The positive feedback was new to Amanda. She liked how it felt to make someone proud.

Amanda blushed a bit and shrugged at her accomplishment, saying, "I got one wrong," It was the word 'calendar'. Amanda huffed and added, "I forgot it was an A and not an E at the end. Cause', come on! Who says cal-end-AR anyway? I thought it was cal-end-ER with and E because you are always telling me to 'sound it out'!"

Elizabeth smirked at Amanda's attempt to mock her. "I did say that, didn't I?" she laughed.

"Yes. You did!"

Carlisle chuckled and grabbed a few folders from the filing cabinet. Elizabeth wordlessly handed him a few other things she knew he was looking for, but hadn't asked her to give him. He smiled at her intuition. He looked up at the woman sitting who was waiting on a chair in the lobby as she wrote a few things down on paper. "I will be with you shortly, Ms Berkly," he told her kindly. She practically fell off her chair in swoon as she nodded her head quickly at the handsome doctor's words.

"Well, now you know that the word 'calendar' doesn't follow that particular rule, Amanda. That is how you learn, from making these little errors," Elizabeth said sweetly, handing back the paper to Amanda who shoved it into the front pouch of her backpack apathetically. She felt like rolling her eyes at Elizabeth, but she held off.

"Did you know that English is the most difficult language to learn?" Carlisle interjected what he and Elizabeth thought was an interesting topic. Elizabeth nodded. She loved the accent of his voice. She knew that he and his family had moved to Kipta from England, but she didn't understand how many years of traveling Europe and North America had developed his unique accent.

"I have heard that too," Ms Berkly, sitting across the room piped up to include herself in the conversation. Amanda narrowed her eyes for a moment sarcastically and then perked up remembering the real reason for rushing from school to see Elizabeth.

"Is it okay if I sleepover at Alice and Rosie's tonight?" Amanda asked hopefully, "We're gonna decorate their tree!" She had talked about it with Alice the other day, but had forgotten to ask Elizabeth until now. Alice was thrilled to celebrate Christmas and had made her father and brothers go out and cut down the biggest, nicest tree they could find. It was sitting in the Cullen's living room waiting to be trimmed.

Amanda looked with her big, blue eyes at Elizabeth hoping for confirmation.

"Of course! It is fine with me so long as Alice and Rosalie have ran it by their parents," Elizabeth answered positively, shooting a glance over to Dr Cullen. She loved Alice to pieces and found Rosalie to be a very responsible, good influence on Amanda. Elizabeth was always pleased when Amanda spent time with the Cullen family.

"Sounds like fun. Can I come to the slumber party too?" Carlisle teased, making Amanda scrunch up her face in disgust. She thought of Dr Cullen as an embarrassing, old person now that she had come to know him. Although, she no longer hated his guts she still found his kindness a bit of a turn off.

"Uh. No…" she answered, unsure how to not be rude. Carlisle chuckled again.

"I am just teasing you, Dear. I don't mind at all if you come over to spend the night," he agreed and Amanda's face lit up again. She began to run towards the door. Then she remembered she needed to tell Elizabeth where she was going first and stopped. She always forgot that part. Elizabeth grinned at Amanda's excitement as she spun around swiftly.

"I am going to go tell Alice you said yes!" Amanda shouted, again too loudly for a business-like atmosphere. Ms Berkly, sitting on a chair next to where Amanda was standing, winced at the child's high-pitched voice. Amanda realized her mistake and grimaced at Elizabeth and Dr Cullen apologetically.

"Do you have plans to meet Alice somewhere?" Elizabeth questioned like any concerned parent would. Amanda shook her head.

"But-" she began to explain.

"Well, how do you know where she'll be? Alice may not have gone straight home after school, Amanda. I don't want you wandering around town by yourself looking for her," Elizabeth rationalized. It got dark early now that it was almost wintertime.

"Oh, don't worry. Alice will know where to find me when I am going to find her!" Amanda said knowingly, making Elizabeth confused. And just as she said that, Alice came strolling up on the sidewalk outside and waved for Amanda to join her outside. "You see!" Amanda added and skipped out the door.

Elizabeth made a puff sound from her lips in the place of a laugh. She leaned back and watched the two girls unite and take off together, not caring where they went because she trusted any one of the Cullen kids with Amanda's care. Elizabeth brought her glance to meet Carlisle's and raised her eyebrows to see what he made of what just happened.

"What a weird coincidence, Alice showing up like that right as Amanda predicted it," he said with fake surprise in his smooth, peaceful voice.

"Ya. She sure called that one!" Elizabeth agreed.

"Perhaps she is psychic!" Ms Berkly said out of the blue, making Elizabeth slowing rise from behind her desk to study the woman's face to know what to say in response. The woman looked serious so she smiled without showing her teeth and nodded slowly. Elizabeth was not a believer in anything supernatural.

"I can take you in exam room one, Ms Berkly, if you will kindly follow me," Carlisle spoke up to save Elizabeth from answering. The woman rose and went down the hall with him. He repressed the urge to laugh at Elizabeth's skeptical facial expression as he passed by her. It practically shouted, _"Okay, crazy lady!"_

*

*

*

"Thank you for understanding, Ms Hanik," Esme told the principal gracefully. She could tell that the older woman did not care for her or her daughter. At long last, the hour of debating Rosalie's behavior in class had finally come to an end. It had taken Esme the entire hour to convince Ms Hanik not to suspend Rosalie. Esme had to practically 'kiss her ass', as the expression goes, to get Rosalie out of trouble so the gossip would not begin to spread about the gruesome sketch that she had drawn. She was mentally fatigued from being pleasant to the horrid woman.

The conclusion was that it was winter break so there would be no point in suspending Rosalie at this time. She was receiving a warning this time and a formal apology to Mr Humphrey was mandatory. Since it was the last day of school until January, the principal decided she would let further punishment slide so long as nothing like this ever happened again.

"Like I've agreed, I will let the events of today slide. However, if your daughter has another incident where she displays this type of morbid imagery on school property I will suspend her," Ms Hanik said with great pleasure, seeing how Rosalie stewed in her seat next to her mother.

"Next drawing is dedicated to you, you ol' prune!" Rosalie muttered under her breath. Esme's eyes widened, appalled at her daughter's words. Ms Hanik seemed to notice the exchange of glances between mother and daughter, but had not been able to hear what Rosalie had said. She was angered, none-the-less.

"Also, if anything like this happens again I will see to it that a mental evaluation be conducted prior to her gaining entrance back into the educational program," Ms Hanik spoke venomously. Rosalie was fuming in her seat next to her mother, but knew she better not lash out at the principal again. If she did, she would be expelled and she would cause their family a great upset and public scrutiny. Not to mention, her mother would have a thing or two more to say about it.

"Yes, Ms Hanik, we understand. Thank you for your time," Esme politely finished the conversation that had taken up the best part of the afternoon. She stood and extended a hand to the principal. Ms Hanik stared at it blankly and then looked down and shifted a pile of folders around on her desk. Esme pulled her hand back awkwardly and gave a harsh nod to her daughter. Rosalie stood up at her mom's request. Ms Hanik glanced at her in case she had something to say for herself, but Rosalie stormed out of the room with magnificent grace.

"Rosalie, wait for me, please!" Esme called to her daughter in a loud whisper as she hurried down the school hallway at human pace. Rosalie ignored her mom until she was outside in the parking lot. The fresh air fitting Rosalie's face helped. Being stuck in an office with, ripe, plump Ms Hanik for over an hour had been excruciating. Rosalie, at one point, had had the thought of how easy it would have been to just kill the woman. She knew it was very wrong of her to think that way and punished herself internally for even thinking that way.

"I just want to go home!" Rosalie said as they got to the Silver Audi parked in the lot. Esme decided it was best to give Rosalie a few minutes to calm down before she had a serious chat with her. They both got into the car and headed home to the house on the lake. Neither of them spoke for a solid five minutes.

"I don't understand why you did this, Rosalie. You know better than to act out like that in class," Esme spoke up eventually, breaking up the silence on the drive towards the lake. She was completely shocked to have been called down to the high school on the count of Rosalie's behavior today. It was sometimes Emmet disrupting his classes that had her visiting teachers, but so very rarely Rosalie.

Rosalie was silent, not sure what to say. Surely Esme would understand her upset at this time of the year, she felt. She was not happy for getting caught with that drawing in class, but she was too stubborn to admit she had done wrong. She felt like she was the wronged one. It was hard for Rosalie to think clearly when she was recalling her last few hours as a human.

"I don't know what to do with you," Esme said, seeing as Rosalie was not going to say anything to defend herself. "Are you sorry at all for what you have done?"

"No," Rosalie mumbled defiantly.

"No?" Esme inquired, wanting to make sure that was Rosalie's final answer.

"It was just a doodle! It is not a big frickin' deal!" the teen raised her voice in frustration. Esme turned her eyes from the road for a moment to stare at her daughter in disbelief.

"I just spent more than an hour with that horrible woman, begging for you to be excused from expulsion!"

"I don't see why you bothered. I don't need to be in school!" Rosalie snapped.

"There is always something new to be learn, Darling," Esme reminded Rosalie gently, hoping to soothe her daughter's obvious anger. They were pulling up to the lake house at that moment and Esme parked the silver Audi she had borrowed back in the garage and got out. Rosalie waited to see if she would leave, but Esme was not going anywhere without her.

"This is ridiculous. I didn't do anything wrong!" Rosalie huffed as she got out and slammed the car door shut, something she would never do to a beautiful vehicle on any other occasion except when she was this upset.

"I beg to differ. You have always had a temper, but today you lost sight of your control. Around humans no less! What if you had gone further?"

"Further than what? Artwork and name-calling? Oh no! It's obviously time for an intervention!" Rosalie sarcastically sniped.

"Don't you use that tone with me, young lady," Esme demanded, beginning to lose her gentle tone now that Rosalie was snapping at her. "Come back here. We are not finished!" she said as Rosalie rolled her eyes and took off to the house leaving her inside the garage alone. She shook her head and raced to catch up. Rosalie was inside and putting her coat in the closet on a hanger.

She took her cell phone out of the pocket and looked at the screen to see if Emmet had texted her. He hadn't. She hated that he had not cared enough to message her. She knew Alice would have already told them all about her incident at school. _'Where were all my siblings to support me now?'_ she wondered. Her phone was suddenly snatched away and a very upset mother was holding it with her other hand on her hip.

"I do not appreciate you walking away from me when we're are in the middle of a discussion, Rosalie. You had better watch yourself or there will be consequences," Esme told her daughter in a hard, cold tone. She was growing impatient with Rosalie's rude antics. "Do you understand me?"

"Yee-ess, Ma'am!" Rosalie forced through her teeth.

"You will write a letter to your English teacher apologizing for your behavior today in class. He will be expecting it on his desk the first day back after the holidays. Do you understand me?" Esme sternly set out the guidelines for Rosalie to follow. "It is important to this family to be civil and follow the rules. You know that, Rose,"

"Why bother! I can't use my education for anything anyway. I may as well just quit! I am stuck in this horrible teenage body forever! I'm trapped!" Rosalie yelled loudly. If she had a heart, the blood would have rushed to her face at that moment and turned her red with anger. The raw emotion was not missed on Esme.

"What is wrong with your body?" Amanda peeped, poking in from the other room. She had a red ball on a hook pinched between her thumb and index finger. Alice stepped up behind Amanda and took her by the shoulders, feeling a bit tense about the situation. Rosalie glared at the little girl. Rosalie was not in the mood to explain the dynamics of her condition to Amanda at this time and she was most certainly not in the mood to play 'Christmas Prep' with her and Alice either.

"The chicken is in the oven, Mom," Alice softly said, at a barely audible tone. She knew her mother could probably smell the flesh cooking upstairs, but wanted to let her know that she had foreseen the hold up at school and had carried through with the meal plan Esme had came up with for Amanda that evening. Esme nodded and gave a grateful, small smile to her tiny pixie daughter. Then she returned her attention to Rosalie, who was glaring at the floor.

"I think you're perfect the way you are, Rosie," Amanda complimented Rosalie with a smile when she did not receive an answer to her previous question.

"Oh, what do you know?!" Rosalie snapped at Amanda. Alice's eyes fluttered and she looked shocked.

"Rosalie!" Esme gasped.

"Rose, be careful…" Alice warned quietly. Alice could see the repercussions if Rosalie lost her temper with Amanda and was trying to help avoid the whole scene.

Amanda was not deterred. She was too excited about the tree trimming that she and Alice were getting into. She had never had a tree before. This was the first Christmas that she was actually excited about. She held up the red ball in her hand and smiled, proud of it. She had made it for Rosalie when she and Alice got home after school.

"Hey, are you coming to help us? We have a lot more decorating to do, and look! I made you a special ball with your name on it!" Amanda beamed and ran up to Rosalie and put the tacky, red ball in her hand. "It is still a bit damp so don't touch the part with your name yet!"

Rosalie closed her eyes and took a deep breath and clenched her fist so tightly around the bulb that it shattered and cracked into a many pieces and fell to the floor. Amanda gawked at the glass shreds on the carpeted floor and then back up at Rosalie, her smile lost now. Rosalie looked like she might snap at any moment.

"Rosalie Lillian Cullen, you will not take your attitude out on her. She has done noth-" Esme began to speak.

"Oh of course! I am the EVIL MONSTER! How dare I upset the HUMAN!" Rosalie screamed. Amanda flinched as the blonde teen went running by her and to her room. Less than a second later a door slammed and Amanda flinched again. And then the emotions came. Amanda's chin quivered giving the first sign that she had taken Rosalie's outburst personally.

"Oh, oh…Darling," Esme cooed, getting down on her knee to Amanda's level. "Don't cry,"

"Rose didn't mean it, Amanda," Alice said. Amanda tried to control herself, feelings embarrassed to be crying like a baby, but the tears were unstoppable. Jasper had heard the confrontation from the other room and now that he could feel Amanda's hurt from what Rosalie had said to her he came to help out. Esme waved him over to Amanda and he got down and took her hand, making her feel a bit better in an instant.

"Honey, I'm home!" Carlisle sang out cheerfully as he entered through the front door. His beaming smile went and he stopped short and stared at the scene. His wife and youngest two children were huddled around Amanda whose face was heated from crying and shiny from smeared tears.

"Hey Daddy," Alice was the only one who responded.

"What's going on? What did I miss?" he asked, curiously. He had been looking forward to coming home from work to his family expecting happy children and wife waiting for him.

"I think we are okay now," Esme told her husband, not wanting to draw him into the situation. "Right, Amanda?"

"Ya," Amanda answered with a sniffle. Esme turned to Alice and Jasper and smiled. They would take care of Amanda. She felt much better with Jasper so near pushing happiness into her consciousness and it was all she had needed to get over the shock of Rosalie's nasty words that had momentarily hurt her feelings. Esme wiped Amanda's face one more time and then stood up and walked over to Carlisle.

"Your daughter..." Esme emphasized that Rosalie was Carlisle's in this occasion since she was acting out, "...has picked now as the time to go through her teenage rebellion and I have to go have a serious chat with her about her behavior!"

"Oh?" Carlisle asked, a bit shocked to hear that Rose was the problem and not Emmet this time.

"Would you mind checking on the chicken that is in the oven? It needs to come out in a few minutes I am betting," Esme asked Carlisle lovingly, stroking his arm and leaning in to kiss his cheek. She was making chicken strips for Amanda for dinner.

"Of course, Love," Carlisle replied, as any good husband would have. Then he studied his children once more to make sure they had everything under control. As Esme turned to leave the room her face changed to a much more maternal expression. She was going into the lion's den to deal with Rosalie's attitude. Esme was not pleased with her eldest daughter at the moment. Not one bit. Carlisle sighed.

"Why is Rosie mad at me?" Amanda asked, calmed down enough to talk now. She normally didn't break down over words, but Rosalie was her friend and she looked up to the blonde teenage as a role model. It would have devastated Amanda to have Rosalie not like her.

"No, she is not mad at you. She is having a bad day," Alice told Amanda. Jasper nodded in agreement and Amanda watched him closely. She knew by now that Alice meant what she said and was never wrong. And she also knew that Jasper had the ability to read people's emotions. It was pretty obvious now that she spent more time with him and Alice. Amanda liked Jasper for that reason. He seemed to know what she felt and when she was close to him she felt safe somehow.

"You sure?" she checked.

"Yes, I'm always sure," Alice confirmed what she knew with a reassuring grin.

"She's sorry for yelling at you too," Jasper added looking up at the ceiling, noting the guilt vibes coming from Rosalie's room upstairs.

"I am so confused," Amanda squeaked.

"So am I," Carlisle agreed, standing by his lonesome in the hallway trying to make sense of what was going with his family. "So am I," he repeated softly for dramatic effect. He was serious, though. He was genuinely in the dark about that was happening with his normally, copacetic family.

Alice, Jasper and Amanda watched him standing bewildered in the hallway and they all broke out in laughter. Alice ruffled Jasper's hair lovingly for the pick-me-up!

*

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*

Esme stood outside Rosalie's bedroom door for a few seconds before entering. She needed to calm herself before going in there or she feared she might lose her composure. It was not unlike Rosalie to say or do things that were a touch on the mean side, but yelling at an innocent child was taking things too far.

"Just come in already!" Rosalie belted out from inside her door. Esme gripped the doorknob and twisted roughly, nearly breaking the door off the hinges as she let herself inside.

"Change your attitude right away or you will regret it, Missy! I am in no mood for your snot!" Esme demanded of her daughter in a raised tone of voice that was rarely heard in the Cullen household.

"Oh, relax!" Rosalie told her mother with a hard glare.

The vampires in house were all able to overhear this and they cringed. The kids were all in front of the flat screen playing Wii Fit Hula-hoop. Amanda was laughing at Emmet's butt wiggle, oblivious to Esme and Rosalie's feud on the 3rd floor. None of the Cullen teens liked confrontation with Esme or Carlisle. They had adopted them as their parents just as Esme and Carlisle had adopted them as their children. All of them were brought into the immortal world at too young of an age to ever mentally be adults. The kids normally tried their best to respect and follow their parent's guidelines for the most part.

"Excuse me?" Esme questioned her daughter, growing angrier.

"I said…relax. It is not like I killed anybody. It was just a doodle on a note pad. Big deal! So what?!"

"You drew a human being with a stake through his heart and blood spilling from his open mouth! I would hardly call that 'just a doodle', Rose," Esme said to her daughter. She was enraged. "What has gotten into you?"

"Nothing. I'm fine!" Rosalie belted out, looking away from her mother and out the window of her bedroom to see out at the lake that had frozen over on the top and was frosted with light snowfall.

"No, you're not fine. What you did today, although it didn't hurt anybody or cause us exposure, was wrong. You know better than to publicly lose your temper. You do not get the luxury of behaving like an angry teen, even if you are having a bad day. We have a heightened level of responsibility to follow. If you can't control your temper in public, then you know your father and I will support you taking a day off, but your anger must not draw attention to your true nature. I think you may have frightened your teacher and principal today with your drawing,"

"I didn't get expelled or even suspended!" Rosalie argued. The long speech her mother had just given her had made her livid.

"That is not what this is about, Rose," Esme tried to reason with Rosalie with a calmer tone. She wished she was as good at keeping her demeanor as her husband was, but she was still very angry with her daughter for her misbehavior that day.

"Then what are you doing in my room, freaking out at me for? What is this about?!" Rosalie yelled at her mom, as she grew irritated by the conversation. She was nearly shaking with annoyance and rage. Esme stepped closer to her and tried a more gentle tone. Rosalie practically cringed away at the close proximity of her mother.

"Are you not sorry at all for what happened downstairs?" Esme asked in a soft voice. "Amanda looks up to you. You upset her. Jasper had to step in to calm her down and stop her tears. She thinks you are cross with her and-"

"So you're mad because of what I did to your precious Amanda?" Rosalie barked at her mother.

"What?" Esme questioned, in a soft, surprised voice. She sighed and waited patiently for Rosalie to explain herself. Rosalie looked like she was going to cry, but they both knew that that was not about to happen. Rosalie closed her eyes and let herself sink to the window bench beneath her and hung her head in shame. She didn't want to envy the child.

"It is not that I don't like her, Mom. I know she is important to you," she began to explain. He voice was back to its usual melodic tone, yet a few octaves lower than it naturally was. Esme's furrowed brow relaxed at Rosalie's attempt to explain her feelings. She sat on the cushioned bench across from her daughter and waited to hear more. "I just don't see why we have to change so much to accommodate her,"

"What do you mean, Darling?" Esme inquired. She placed her hand on Rosalie's thigh and rested it there.

"This! This whole Christmas thing, with the tree and decorations and you've invited Elizabeth and Amanda over for Christmas Eve! We are the Cullens! We don't celebrate Christmas, Mom!" Rosalie cried out in desperation.

"Oh, Honey. I didn't realize you were upset about this. Of course," Esme cooed, suddenly realizing where Rosalie's upset was stemming from. Her stomach knotted with guilt for not catching on to this fact sooner. Of course it made sense that Rosalie would be acting out. It was the anniversary of her death and the first time that it was being made light of in their family for decades.

"I'm sorry, Mom. You know how I am about change. I had a hard time letting Amanda into our lives in the first place. I have accepted that she is family now. I get that and even Elizabeth is starting to warm on me, but I don't think I am strong enough for acting human at a time like this. I am not good with Christmas,"

"I am so sorry I didn't think of your feelings, Baby," Esme soothed, pulling Rosalie into her and holding her close. She rubbed circles into her daughter's back, not worried that Rosalie was a nearly one hundred year old vampire and not a young child. At heart, Rosalie would always be sixteen at heart, though. Stuck at a very sensitive age. All of Esme's children would be teenagers for eternity.

"It's okay, Mom. I'm sorry too," Rosalie apologized with real sincerity, a rare occurrence for her to show this vulnerable side of her personality. "For getting in trouble at school and then yelling at you. I didn't mean to be so vile!"

"All if forgiven, Dear," Esme forgave. "If you need to take time away from the activities that are happening downstairs or this weekend when Elizabeth is over, you just tell me or your father and we will understand. We don't want you to be hurting,"

"Thanks, Mom,"

There was a knock at the door and then a shuffling sound from downstairs that Rose and her mother heard and it made them perk their heads up and release the hug they were sharing.

"Amanda…not now…"

"But I want to tell Rosie I am not mad at her,"

"You can tell her later, now come on!"

"But-"

This was the whispered conversation that Alice was trying to keep from her sister and mother on the other side of the door. Rosalie smiled. "It's okay, Alice. She can come in," Rosalie spoke at a normal volume. Esme took her hand and squeezed it lovingly. The door opened and Amanda came stumbling forward and then to a stop. She hesitated for a moment.

"Uh…Do you want to come downstairs and be with us now?" she asked shyly.

"I think Rosalie needs some space, Amanda. We don't normally celebrate Christmas and Rose really needs us to all understand that she is not comfortable celebrating as wholeheartedly as the rest of us," Esme gently told Amanda.

"Why don't you like Christmas?" the child asked bluntly. Esme was about to explain, but Rosalie took over.

"It's okay, Mom," she said to Amanda. "I can tell her. She should know," Rosalie patted the bench seat and Amanda walked over and sat in-between Rosalie and Esme.

"Know what?" Amanda asked carefully. She knew that this was a tense moment. She was doing her best to be a good listener like Elizabeth was trying to instill in her.

"Do you remember how my mom told you the story about how my father saved her when she was close to death?" Rosalie asked carefully, not wanting to frighten Amanda and make her cry for the second time in one day. Amanda nodded; recalling the story Esme had told her while they had been riding the Ferris Wheel.

"Well, a long time ago, at this time of year I was walking home from a Christmas Ball. I was alone and I decided to take a shortcut through the back alleys behind the local taverns…pub…bar," Rosalie said, trying to find the right words so that Amanda would understand. Then she continued after a slight pause, "I was attacked by a few men and they left me for dead,"

"They tried to kill you?!" Amanda gasped, her mouth hanging open. Esme looked nervous. Alice seemed to be okay with Rosalie's decision to share, knowing that Amanda would handle the story as well as she had the other news of their strange abilities.

"Yes, but long story short...I am just not very good at forgetting the past, Amanda. This time of year reminds me of that horrible night," Rosalie admitted. Alice and Esme both touched her to show support. Amanda was thinking so she asked, "Do you understand now why I do not like Christmas?"

Amanda nodded and then bit her lip.

"You know…I never used to like Christmas either," she shared, feeling a bit apprehensive to do so, but since her mentor, Rosalie had been brave enough, Amanda decided she could be honest as well. "My mom was always gone to parties and she would come back drunk and forget the tree and the presents and in the morning she would be in the bathroom throwing up for hours,"

The three vampire women all sat frozen, watching Amanda sadly.

"This is the first year I am celebrating Christmas. Maybe you can start over like I am and this can be your first Christmas too!" Amanda said, with a higher hint of hope in her last few words. Esme smiled and Alice's pixie face went into a huge grin. They all remained silent as Rosalie thought on it for a moment.

"You know what, Amanda?" Rosalie asked rhetorically, "I think you are right. I should try to move on," she said, making the little girl beam with pride as the beautiful modelesque teen took her by the hand and stood up. "Let's go take a look at that tree you have been decorating. I should probably inspect it to make sure Alice hasn't gone overboard on it,"

"Ya!" Amanda exclaimed, clapping her hands together.

"Hey!" Alice just got the little jab her sister sent her way and pretended to pout over it. A half second later she was following the other two girls out the room and down the grand staircase to the main floor living room where a ten-foot tree stood in the center of the room.

Esme slowly trailed behind her girls and stood, leaning against the banister when she got to the bottom. She smiled a peaceful smile and took in the scene. Two arms wrapped around her waist and a kiss was placed on the crown of her head.

"The chicken is on the counter. Should I be calling Amanda to the table?" Carlisle inquired. Esme shook her head lightly.

"Give them a few more minutes," she said watching Jasper and Emmet leave their Nintendo game to help string the lights on the tree. Alice was directing them how to go about it and Amanda was pulling Rosalie to the coffee table to see the hand painted balls that she and Alice had been working on.

"I am sorry I broke the special ball you made for me," Rosalie said to Amanda.

"I know!" Amanda chirped positively, "Jasper told me you didn't mean to hurt my feelings. It's okay though... me and Alice made you another and it is even better then the last one!"

Rosalie chuckled and took the newly decorated ordainment from Amanda and delicately found a place for it to hang on the tree. Amanda smiled proudly. She was the happiest that she had ever been. Esme sighed and leaned into her husband. He snuggled her back in return. This was the happiest their family had ever been as well. It was finally complete.

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**Please Remember to Review!**


	22. Eve

**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Twenty-Two  
**

|Eve|

"I look stupid!" Emmet whined as he studied himself in the full-length mirror of the Cullen's front foyer. He was wearing dark grey dress slacks and a long sleeved shirt with an argyle sweater vest over top. Jasper wore the same, but in Blue. Emmet winced as Alice jumped up beside him and slapped his arm.

"You do not!" she told him harshly, insulted that he would dare complain about the outfit she had chosen for him for the momentous occasion. "You look handsome. Stop fiddling with your collar or I will give you something to really whine about!"

It was Christmas Eve and the Cullen's lakefront home was decorated to the hills, from top to bottom, inside and out. It was all Alice's doing. However, Esme was not about to stop her eccentric, perky child from going all out this year. Amanda and Elizabeth would be arriving shortly and it was of the utmost importance that everything be shipshape, perfect for their arrival.

"Children, you will stop that nonsense right now," Esme warned Alice and Emmet as she waltzed down the staircase, elegant in an ivory silk skirt and blouse ensemble that Alice had helped her pick out from a dozen other options.

"Wow, Mom!" Rosalie complimented her mother, as she took the time to look away from her own reflection in the hallway mirror. She was wearing a tight red dress that reached her knees.

"Mom, you look so-" Jasper began to speak.

"HOT!" Emmet blurted out with a big, honest grin on his face. Esme's eyes bulged a bit, but her soft, warm smiled returned. He was proud of his adopted mother more than anything else.

"Thank you," she responded and she stopped in front of Emmet, licked her fingers, and proceeded to tidy up a few of his messy curls. He shrunk a bit in embarrassment.

"Mo—om," he groaned. She chuckled as he got away from her.

"Alright, so we are all ready for the evening. I wish I did not have to remind you all to be on your best behavior, but I think we know that I do. This is not a request. I do not want any mishaps tonight," Esme instructed her kids. She couldn't help but direct her words to Emmet who was the most likely to forget himself around their guests.

"We know, Mom!" Emmet said impatiently. He had been getting the 'don't act like a vampire around Elizabeth speech' for the last several days leading up to tonight.

"Elizabeth is a good friend of ours and we need to keep up appearances. Does everyone understand?"

"Yes," All the Cullen kids replied at the same time, in the same, dull voice.

"Good. Everyone have a wonderful time this evening. It is the first Christmas for us in a long time and we want to all enjoy it," Esme finished her chat. She put her arm around Rosalie supportively, knowing this was the most challenging on her eldest daughter to take in. Rosalie smiled lightly. She was trying her best to enjoy the party too, for Amanda's sake.

"Ooo...they're almost here!" Alice shared excitedly. She jumped up and down clapping her hands. Jasper smiled and let go of her so she could run to the window and peek out. It was dark out already, being that it was winter and one of the shortest days of the year. There was a covering of fresh, powdered snow covering every surface and the lights from the house and trees lit up the yard magically and glowed off of Alice's face as she peered outside.

"Jasper, you've got a handle on your manic other half, right?" Rosalie asked jokingly about Alice who pretended not to hear her sister's rude comment. Rosalie still gave Jasper a quick glance to see if he was going to be of help toning his mate's excitement down a bit if she got too hyper. Jasper nodded slightly, but he watched Alice with a loving smile on his face. He loved her just as she was.

"Rosalie. You remember what we discussed. If you feel overwhelmed at all or by anything this evening you are free to excuse yourself from the party. Your mother and I will understand," Carlisle spoke kindly as he entered the foyer, buttoning the cuffs of his dress shirt around his wrists.

"Yes, Dad. Thank you," Rosalie answered him. She felt strong and thought she would be able to handle the nights events, but she was glad her parents were being understanding about her feelings towards her lack of Christmas spirit. She pushed her horrible memories of 'that night' away and stood up tall as she heard Elizabeth's Firefly driving up the bend.

"Here they come!" Alice informed everyone.

"Well, duh! We can hear them too, Midget!" Emmet teased his little sister. He was overly huge and she was less than tiny. Beside one another it was hard to decide if he was a giant or she was a midget. Alice backed away from the window and stuck her tongue out at him, but she caught Esme's frown of disapproval and but it back in her mouth and continued to bounce around excitedly.

"You…look so beautiful, my love," Carlisle whispered into Esme's ear. She closed her eyes and sighed. He kissed her ear lobe and then her neck.

"Thank you. You look positively dashing as well, my darling," she replied, still wrapped in his embrace and she turned her face up to kiss his perfectly carved lips. Her full ones fit into his like they were meant to and he kissed her back.

"Heh hem!" Alice coughed lightly. All the kids were mildly gawking at their parents.

"Geez, you two…get a room!" Emmet took Alice's subtle hint to their parents a bit too far. Esme and Carlisle smiled and put a touch more space between them. They could hear the engine of Elizabeth's car turn off and two doors open. It was time to put on the human show.

Alice gripped the door handle as two pair of footsteps walked up towards the house. Amanda's were light and close together. Elizabeth's were spaced out and sharp. The vampires took one more moment to quickly straighten themselves out. Alice opened the door swiftly to reveal Amanda with her fist raised in the air, paused in her effort to knock.

"Merry Christmas!" Alice sang. Emmet came bounding closer and picked Amanda up into a hug. Amanda was stiff as a board, but not because she didn't like Emmet's affection. She was getting used to the exorbitant teen. She was just surprised at how well set up, well prepared, and well dressed the Cullens were. They once again looked like the perfect family.

"Let her breathe, Em," Rosalie told her mate playfully. Amanda smiled at Rosalie in return. Esme did a double take to make sure Emmet really wasn't squeezing Amanda too tightly. He let Amanda slide to the floor and he stabilized her before giving her a bit of space.

"What did you think of the lights outside, Mandi?" Alice asked excitedly. She undressed Amanda swiftly, removing the thick coat, scarf, gloves, and hat from the little girl. She shook the snow from them and hung them up.

"They look nice. I could see them all the way from our house!" Amanda said bluntly, commenting on the bright lights that were enough to cover three houses and not just the one lake house. Alice took this as a compliment while the other Cullens laughed. Elizabeth felt her eyes well up slightly at Amanda's casual mention of her home belonging to the pair of them. Amanda didn't recognize what she had revealed. She was starting to feel self worth again, like she had a home with Elizabeth.

"Liz! Welcome!" Esme cheered in a soft tone. She knew that Elizabeth was having a hard time dealing with Cole's absence this year around the holidays. Elizabeth had divulged that information to her in a conversation a few days earlier over the phone. She told Esme the only thing that made her life worth living these days was Amanda.

"Esme," Elizabeth sighed, welcoming Esme's embrace. It was hard and cool, but the warmth that Esme felt from her still heart was obviously present as they held each other. They were more than acquaintances now. They were friends.

"We are so happy to have you. Thank you for coming," Carlisle greeted her, taking over the embrace from his wife. Elizabeth gladly traded one friend for the other. Esme latched onto Amanda and held her tightly. Amanda allowed it, but wiggled free as soon as she was able.

"Thank you for having us! Amanda has talked of nothing else for days. I have been looking forward to it as well," Elizabeth admitted. Carlisle let her go and they exchanged smiles. He reached out to pat Amanda on the head, knowing they were not on a hugging level of friendship quite yet. She held still and wrinkled her nose.

"When is dinner? I'm hungry!" Amanda announced blatantly with a huge grin on her face. It was already seven o'clock and Elizabeth usually served dinner at half passed five.

"Amanda!" Elizabeth corrected though her teeth. Amanda simply shrugged, which made the doctor and his wife chuckle. Esme didn't mind at all that Amanda had spoken her mind.

"Dinner is almost ready. I know I have mentioned this before, but I am not the most well practiced cook. I hope the meal will be to your liking," Esme said softly, direct to Elizabeth. She was nervous to cook for a human friend, who was more likely to notice her lack of time spent in the kitchen during the last three decades, more than Amanda would have.

"I am sure it will be perfect, Esme. I am just grateful I don't have to cook it!" Elizabeth laughed.

"Well, why don't we go upstairs and eat then!" Esme exclaimed.

"Yes! Let's!" Amanda and Alice agreed wholeheartedly at the same time. They were the first to take steps towards the staircase. Elizabeth sighed and shook her head lightly in apology at Esme for Amanda's lack of manners. It was not a big deal to the Cullens. They were more than pleased that Amanda made herself at home in their house. Soon, Elizabeth would do the same.

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"Mandi?" Alice whispered carefully, leaning from her seat at the dining room table near Amanda's. She had never sat down for a Christmas Eve dinner before. In fact, the only time Alice recalled sitting at a table 'to eat' was at Amanda's ninth birthday party and that had been a casual meal of pizza and then cake. Two human foods she had seen plenty of commercials for on the television.

"What?" Amanda whispered, back when Elizabeth was busy with Emmet preoccupation with her hair being the same color as the yams. He asked her why her hair was so orange and she was trying to give him an answer at the same time as letting Esme know she didn't mind answering Emmet's question.

"What is that stuff called again?" Alice asked quietly, pointing to a plate of greens. Her face was twisted slightly in disgust. Amanda saw what she was pointing at and nodded and made the same face.

"Asparagus…it's nasty!" she explained. She could vaguely hear Emmet ask if Liz's hair was naturally that color orange and Esme reprimanding him for asking such a bold question. Elizabeth laughed and told him ,yes, but that she had found a few grey strands the other day. Amanda caught a quick glance at Rosalie's appalled face at the mention of grey hair.

"Oh, do you want me to take yours for you then?" Alice offered kindly to Amanda who brought her attention back to their conversation about asparagus. She nodded eagerly at Alice who looked to make sure Emmet was still distracting Elizabeth and then turned back to Amanda's plate. She snatched the asparagus so fast Amanda blinked and her plate was veggie free. Alice tucked it stealthily into a sack that was replaced under each one of the dining room chairs. Amanda beamed.

"Thanks!" she whispered to Alice and they giggled. Then Alice sensed an awkward moment about to occur, but didn't know what would cause it. She decided she would try using a human act to distract Elizabeth from Emmet's weird questions and table manners. He was busy balancing a stack of corn on his plate in the shape of the Eiffel Tower. It was impressive except for the fact that he was supposed to be behaving like a refined, young man instead of a childish, boy.

"Pass the sweet niblets, please!" Alice sang without any sense of teasing in her pretty, dainty voice. Elizabeth smiled and paused for a moment. She looked down at the bowl of corn in front of her and realized it was what Alice meant. She picked up the bowl and passed it to Alice. Esme and Carlisle laughed nervously. Rosalie rolled her eyes.

"It's corn, Alice," Amanda explained softly to the tiny vampire, covering her mouth with her chunk of French bread so Elizabeth wouldn't see her mouth moving.

"Oh! So this is corn!" Alice said without whispering. She had only ever seen it on a cob. Her face lit up in recognition. Everyone's head turned in her direction at once. Elizabeth smiled without showing her teeth and raised an eyebrow at the tiny teenager. "I mean…I love it!" Alice said with wide, lying eyes. She giggled and then took it a bit further, "Corn…Yum!" As she spoke she nodded in rhythm.

Amanda burst out laughing and chocked mildly on a bite of French bread she had in her mouth. She coughed a few times and it dislodged from her throat and she then resumed laughing.

"Alright, Darling. Settle down now and eat your-" Elizabeth chuckled, speaking to Amanda from the other end of the table. She stopped halfway through her sentence and leaned up and peered over the contents spread on the grand table and onto Amanda's plate. "What happened to your vegetables?"

"I ate them," Amanda said too innocently. Elizabeth narrowed her eyes and waiting for Amanda to crack, but the child smiled a big, toothy grin. Elizabeth had put a few stocks of asparagus on Amanda's plate when she served her, but they were missing now. She could not prove Amanda had not eaten them, but she was fairly certain something devious was going on behind her back.

"That is unlike you," Elizabeth stated, "So, you expect me to believe you simply ate them? Without any coaxing?"

"It's a Christmas Miracle!" Amanda replied with a smirk and shrug. Everyone laughed. Even Rosalie, who was not enjoying transferring the food from her plate into the sack under her chair, thought Amanda was pretty cute.

"Oh, well, you've gotten away with it tonight, Amanda," Elizabeth spoke up after suppressing her own amusement, "but Alice won't always be there to eat your vegetables for you,"

Amanda looked at Alice with a bratty grin on her face. Elizabeth was not too far off from the truth, but misunderstood why the two girls found this so amusing.

Dinner went on without anymore more miss-naming of the side dishes or constructional buildings out of food from Emmet. Elizabeth tried to help clean up, but Carlisle insisted she was the guest and should go have a seat in the living room with Esme and leave the kitchen clean up to him and the kids.

Much to the kids' dismay, this was not a request. Carlisle left his four vampire teens in charge of clean up as he prepared dessert and a pot of tea. Amanda didn't mind cleaning up. It was fast the way the Cullen's sped through the chore. Amanda watched in awe as they all worked in sync and had the whole dining room and kitchen area spotless and sparkling in under a minute.

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The evening continued to run smoothly for the Cullens. Elizabeth felt at home with the family of vampires. She never once judged them for being slightly odd. In all their glorious perfection, it was somehow easy to gloss over. Elizabeth was enjoying herself much more than she had anticipated.

"I am having such a lovely, time," Elizabeth shared when the moment presented itself in a break in the conversation. "I hope you don't mind, but I brought you a small hostess gift,"

Elizabeth reached down to her large purse by her feet and pulled out a square, wrapped present. She didn't really need her glasses at the moment and they were bothering her. She had a habit of putting them on her head and forgetting them there, so she placed them into her purse for safe keeping.

"Liz, I thought we agreed on not exchanging gifts," Carlisle said kindly. It was Elizabeth who had come up with the agreement, not he. She didn't want him to spoil her anymore more than he already did at work. Her Christmas bonus was three times her monthly mortgage payment and she had tried to turn him down, but he insisted she deserved it.

"This is for Esme," Elizabeth told him slyly. He smiled and didn't say another word.

"You shouldn't have," Esme told Elizabeth as she accepted the gift.

"Oh, yes, I should have!" Elizabeth corrected her friend lovingly, "For all that you do concerning Amanda...I am eternally grateful,"

"Oh, well. It is a pleasure. We adore her," Esme replied warmly. Both women stole a loving glance towards the little girl.

The kids were all gathered in a circle on the floor around a laid out game of Risk. Amanda was sitting in Jasper's lap laughing as he moved their plastic men around the board with cunning strategy. They were winning. Rosalie and Alice made up another team and Emmet had nearly been wiped off the board already.

"Thank you, Liz," Esme said again as she returned her attention to the gift. Elizabeth encouraged her to open it so she did. She carefully ripped the taped edges of the tissue paper and lifted the material inside out onto her lap. She gazed in astonishment at the gift.

"I know it is not much, but I wanted to make you something for your home. It is one of the only talents I have. Crocheting, that is. Will you be able to make use of it?" Elizabeth bantered nervously, worried her gift was not up to par with the rest of the Cullen's fine things.

"It is so beautiful, Liz," Esme gasped, unfolding the large, hand made gift to look at the delicately woven design. The material used for crocheting was fine, ivory lace. The intricacy of it was stunning and the finished product was a large size. It was a tablecloth for a large rectangular table. It would have taken months and many hours to complete such fine, detailed artistry.

"Amanda helped," Elizabeth informed as Esme's hand brushed over a tiny patch of the tablecloth that was not in sync with the rest. It was loose and flawed in one corner about the size of a silver dollar, so it was hardly noticeable, but it was visible to the critical eye. "She wanted to help with your gift so I taught her how to croquet. It may not look like much, but she worked for hours on that one spot. Meticulously, as a matter of fact,"

"I absolutely love it, Liz," Esme said sincerely and she leaned forward to hug her friend. "It is the most thoughtful gift. Thank you,"

"You're welcome. I hope you will find a use for it,"

"Oh, I will. I will only bring it out for special occasions such as tonight," Esme decided, as she hugged her hand made gift to her chest. "I wish I would have known we were not breaking the 'no gift rule'. I have nothing to give you in return,"

"Are you kidding?" Elizabeth laughed lightly, "Tonight was a gift! All the nights since your family moved in town and opened your hearts to Amanda...and myself...have been your gift to us,"

Esme smiled and wished she could cry to show how much that sentiment meant to her. She folded up the gift from Elizabeth and set it beside her on the back of the sofa gently. "I have a small present for Amanda. If that is alright with you, of course," she inquired for permission from Elizabeth before she went to retrieved the parcel.

"I don't mind, Esme," Elizabeth agreed. Esme beamed and got up gracefully and went over to the tree and pulled a tiny package that was resting on the branches.

"I know you think we spoil her…" she began to explain when she returned with the tiny gift box in her hand.

"Children should be spoiled sometimes," Elizabeth agreed pleasantly. Esme smiled and nodded as she sat back down on the sofa. She turned her attention toward the kids.

"Amanda, would you come here, please, for a moment?" She called out. Amanda looked at Esme and then at Jasper. He nodded and lifted her up to her feet.

"Do you think you can manage without me?" She asked him cheekily. He threw his head back and laughed. Alice giggled and then rolled the dice for her turn. Emmet was officially out of the game now and he was sitting behind Rosalie, cheering his mate on. Amanda ran over to Esme impatiently, not wanting to leave the game. "What?" she asked as she halted in front of Esme.

"I have a gift for you, Amanda. Would you like to open it now?" Esme asked, excited to give the tiny present to her granddaughter. Amanda looked at her youthful grandmother and licked her lips as she thought. She knew it was important so she nodded to appease the adults. Esme pulled Amanda closer and wrapped her arms around the child, playing the gift in Amanda's hands.

Amanda sighed and bit her lip as she fiddled with the ribbon to untie it. Then she opened the box and blinked a few times. She reached in a pulled out the silver bracelet from within. It was 'C' shaped and in the very center was an oval stone. The silver laced around the stone and it sparkled in the light.

"Do you like it?" Esme asked. Amanda nodded, her mouth open a bit as she studied the jewelry. "It belonged to my daughter," she hinted. Amanda understood what that meant immediately and she spun her body around so she could see Esme's face. It had been her mother's bracelet as a child. She hugged Esme, which surprised the maternal vampire in a good way. She hugged her granddaughter back blissfully.

"Thank you," Amanda said sincerely and let Esme help put the bracelet on her wrist. It was loose fitting, but stayed in place and dangled off her forearm.

"You're welcome," Esme cooed. Elizabeth and Carlisle watched on with big smiles on their faces. Elizabeth didn't know how very special the gift was, but she enjoyed watching Amanda be happy.

"Amanda! I need you! We have a big decision to make about taking over Germany!" Jasper called out playfully. He didn't really need Amanda's help with the game. He was the champion of 'Risk', but he liked Amanda's enthusiasm so he was letting her believe she was a valid part of their team.

"Go on, Darling, you'd better help him out. World domination takes a woman's perspective," Esme told Amanda with a grin and then sent Amanda off to rejoin the other kids. She proudly shared her gift with the Cullen teenagers. Alice Oooed and Awed over the shiny, new bracelet and informed Amanda it was a mood ring.

"What does gold mean?" Amanda asked, touching the yellow/amber rock. The stone had been dark blue before she had put the bracelet on her wrist. Jasper pulled Amanda back into his lap and she giggled merrily.

"It must mean you're happy!" he told her seriously. He knew that the stone was reacting to body temperature, but he still thought he would inform her of the overwhelming feeling of joy that was radiating through the room at the moment. Amanda smiled and stole the dice from his hand.

"I will be a lot happier if we destroy Alice and Rosie at this game! Let's invade Germany, Jazz!"

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After Alice and Rosalie admitting defeat to Jasper and Amanda at the board game, Amanda had fallen asleep on Emmet's arm as they watched 'A Christmas Carol' on the flat screen. It was getting quite late and passed Amanda's bedtime. Emmet sat motionless, staring at the tiny girl. Rosalie thought it was an adorable sight and took a few photos of Amanda nuzzled up to her mate.

"It is like a kitten nestling up to a Grizzly Bear," Alice whispered gleefully to her blonde sister. Rosalie smiled and took a few more shots of Amanda. Emmet smiled widely in the first few and then he made a funny face and pointed to Amanda in the last.

"I think I had better take her home," Elizabeth said quietly, entering the room behind the vampire girls. Alice danced around to the other side of the sofa to be out of the way. Rosalie smiled and agreed with Elizabeth.

"She fell asleep a few times, but when we tried to turn the television off she woke up and insisted she was not tired," Rosalie explained. Elizabeth chuckled.

"That's Amanda," she whispered as an explanation and she walked over to this sleeping child. Emmet helped Elizabeth get a good hold on her and hoist her up into her arms. Amanda's eyes fluttered open and she tried to lift her head of Elizabeth's shoulder as they made their way to the front foyer. Esme and Carlisle were waiting there and the rest of the kids followed.

"Where we goin'?" Amanda mumbled groggily.

"It's late, Amanda. We have to get home and get you to bed," Elizabeth explained.

"But I'm not tired," Amanda lied; her half open eyelids were a give-a-way. Everyone giggled as Elizabeth set her down to walk for herself now that she had woken up. Amanda stumbled to find her shoes.

"Hey, Runt!" Emmet blurted out loudly, "You have to go to bed or Santa won't bring you any presents!"

"I'm nine! I know Santa is not real!" Amanda informed the huge, teen vampire. Then she yawned to prove how very tired she actually was. Alice knelt down next to Amanda on the floor while the child put her shoes on and whispered into her ear.

"If we are real…don't you think that Santa could be too?" Alice gave Amanda something to think about. Many times over the last few months since trusting Amanda with their part of their secret, Amanda had asked Alice if she was 'magic'. Alice never answered outright, but she let Amanda believe whatever she wanted about her special abilities to see the future. And the same went for Jasper as well. Amanda thought he was 'magical' too.

"So…you're saying…a fat man is going to come down my chimney and leave me presents in the sock that Elizabeth made me hang on the fireplace?" Amanda asked skeptically. Alice grinned widely; showing her perfect set of sparkly, white teeth and nodded. Amanda gave her a sarcastic head tilt and rolled her eyes. Elizabeth was saying her thank yous and goodbyes to Carlisle and Esme so she was missing this whole conversation going on between the Cullen kids and Amanda.

"Well, if he doesn't someone very tiny might do that for you!" Rosalie hinted and looked at Alice with a sly smile. Amanda's eyes grew wide with the possibility and then Alice winked at Amanda.

"But only if you go to bed like a good, little girl!" the tiny, pixie vampire threatened.

"Oh fine!" Amanda said. "Elizabeth is insisting he is real too. I don't know why you all bother. I am not a baby,"

"No, but you're like our wittle, baby sister!" Emmet cooed in a girly voice and as Amanda stood up he grabbed her into a hug that squished the air out of her yet again. Alice giggled and Rosalie snapped another photograph. She too, had been pleasantly surprised with the fun she had this evening. Jasper pried Amanda away from Emmet and felt the gratitude she had for his savior.

Elizabeth finished chatting with Esme at the door and she encouraged Amanda to say thank you. Once they had said goodbye, Elizabeth took her glasses from her purse and put them on, put her large purse in the trunk, and they got into the small, red vehicle and turned up the heat. They had to wait several minutes for the defrost to kick in so Elizabeth could see out the windshield. Once a hole formed in the front window of the car, Elizabeth drove towards the road that lead around the lake. The snow was falling more heavily as they made their way into town.

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"Well, that went well, I thought," Carlisle mentioned peacefully as he and Esme turned off some of the lights in the house.

"Yes, it was quite the success, I agree. I do enjoy having a female friend," Esme agreed. She smiled thoughtfully as she recalled the conversation she and Elizabeth had that evening about Amanda. Both women were entirely devoted to making sure Amanda was well looked after. Elizabeth informed Esme that the grant from social services had come through and Amanda was legally in her custody permanently.

"I am very happy that our families can coincide," Carlisle said.

"Yes. Oh, and I am so thrilled for Amanda. She will be so excited tomorrow when Liz tells her the news about the adoption. I could not think of a better woman than Liz to take care of my little girl," Esme thrilled and gazed lovingly at a photo of Amanda and Elizabeth she had perched in the Christmas tree. She knew that in less than a decade their family would have to leave Kipta behind as Amanda and Elizabeth ages and their family did not.

Esme pulled out the framed photo and stroked the glass over Amanda and Elizabeth's face. Carlisle grinned and hugged Esme from behind. He loved to see her happy and this was the happiest he had ever seen her in the passed thirty-some years they had been together. Their moment was shattered in an instant.

"DAD!!!" A frantic Alice screamed from somewhere in the house. Esme gasped in shock and dropped the picture frame and it crashed to the hardwood floor. Alice was by her parent's side in a flash with horror struck on her pretty face. Esme bent down to pick up the frame, but kept her eyes on her daughter the whole time.

"Alice? What is it?" Carlisle questioned, his eyes frowning in concern when he saw how distraught Alice was. She was shaking as he took her arms in his to calm her. She found his gaze and found the strength to speak.

"Liz…" she breathed airily.

"Oh, no. No no!" Esme cried out. She understood that something very bad was going to happen. Alice was never wrong. She dropped the frame on the sofa and followed her husband to the closet to grab their winter coats for show.

"The visibility was poor. The truck won't see their car. He is going to run right into them!" Alice spit out, holding onto Jasper now for support. Rosalie and Emmet stood in the foyer as well, looking like statues with their mouths gaping open.

"When? How long?" Carlisle asked in a hurry. Alice shook her head and it looked as if tears would fall, but they didn't. It was a bad sign. They were too late already. "Where?"

"I don't know! There was too much snow to read the street signs, but I think it was where Hazel intercepts with the Highway Sixteen!" Alice explained all she knew as fast as she could.

"We can stop it, right?! They will be okay, right?" Emmet asked, panicking slightly. Alice wept into Jasper's chest and he shivered in response to feel what she was going trough as she relived a vision she had just seen.

"I can't see them. I can't see them anymore!" Alice cried. Jasper, though he tried with all his might, could not sooth his mate's fears. "I can't tell what the outcome will be. Liz is hurt badly. It's not good! I can't find Amanda!"

"No," Carlisle told his family as they went to follow him out the open door. "If they are hurt you may not be able to control your bloodlust. You should remain home and I will call you when I know more,"

"I will be able to resist! I am going with you! I can help you!" Rosalie insisted boldly and pushed her way pasted him and towards the Jeep to start it. Rosalie already had her coat on and her boots. She had anticipated being helpful. Staying behind was not an option for her. Carlisle did not argue with his strong-willed daughter. Esme did not want to stay home, but Emmet obeyed his father and took his mother into his arms to comfort her.

"Jasper. I may need your skills as well," Carlisle asked his son for assistance. He knew that Jasper was strong in resisting temptation and would help Rosalie if she needed it. Alice released Jasper from her tight grasp immediately.

"Go. Go help!" she told her mate. Jasper was reluctant to leave Alice, but he dutifully joined his father and went out into the snowy air towards the Jeep. "I will catch up to you," Alice added. She planned to be on the lookout for anything else her visions might bring to her. She watched the Jeep peel out of their driveway, skidding snow in every direction as the huge, monster of a vehicle made its way to the scene of the accident about to happen.

"You're sure, Alice?" Emmet asked with a soft, considerate tone.

"I wish I wasn't. I hope I am wrong," Alice cried weakly as she gazed out into the snowy night. Esme began to weep in Emmet's strong arms.

"Shhh, Mom. It will be okay. You'll see. Dad will find them and he will make everything all right again. Please don't cry," he told his mother, rocking her subtly and rubbing her back with his palm. Alice closed the door and in a mournfully slow pace made her way to the living room were the photograph of Elizabeth and Amanda lay. There was a jagged crack cutting right through Elizabeth's face…and another through Amanda's heart.

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**Please Review**


	23. Of Despair

**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Twenty-Three**

|Of Despair|

Amanda woke up from the rough shaking that riddled her body. She was shivering violently as she opened her eyes. A hazy fog clouded her vision as she tried to figure out where she was. She was not at home in bed like she was supposed to be. There was too much pain, too much cold. There was steam rising from the hood of the car when she leaned forward in her mangled seat enough to see over the dashboard.

It was a blinding flurry of white. The snow was falling heavily around the vehicle. Amanda turned to find Elizabeth, but she was not in her seat. The front, left side of the firefly had been torn away and the white puffs of snow were landing on Amanda as she lay there. There was no sound except for the ticking and creaking of the car and the falling snow was the only movement Amanda could see.

She struggled to free herself from the bent metal around her. She was in too much shock to feel any pain. The cold night air was making her head ache. Amanda managed to lift her self up and out of the car and escape through the side window; slipping on the snow and cutting her hands and knees on glass shards that were invisible in the crystal snowfall. Her skin was too cold to notice the blood.

"Liz?!" Amanda called out. There was no answer. She heard a cracking sound mixed in with the crunch of her foot stepping on the icy ground. She looked down and when she moved her boot there, on the snow packed road, was Elizabeth's broken glasses.

Amanda felt warm tears slide down her cheeks and neck into her scarf; the wind immediately stung her face where any wetness had been. She got up and stumbled around the vehicle. Tears erupted from her eyes and she felt a huge pang of guilt well inside her chest. _'This is all my fault,'_ she thought, recalling the ride home from the Cullens. Elizabeth had been trying to tell Amanda how proud she was of her and that she loved her. Amanda had not responded to the words 'I love you' and when Elizabeth turned to face Amanda… that is when everything had went black.

"Liz!" Amanda shrieked, spotting Elizabeth's body a few feet in front of the car. She was face down on the snow-packed street. Dark red stains inked the ground around her and she remained motionless as Amanda got to her. "Liz!"

Amanda crouched down and touched Elizabeth's shoulder, but knew not to shake or move her in any way. Elizabeth was unresponsive and Amanda was not even sure she was breathing. Amanda shot up and began to look for Elizabeth's cell phone. In all her panic, Amanda didn't realize Elizabeth had put it in the trunk. After a minute of frantic searching Amanda decided she would have to go find help.

"I will be right back, okay?" Amanda cried out, desperate for an answer. She wasn't sure Elizabeth could hear her, but it made her feel better to pretend that everything was going to be okay. Amanda peeled off her jacket and placed it carefully over Elizabeth's mangled body and head. Amanda remembered a first aid video in class about shock. She knew that her coat would act as a buffer to keep the snow off and the heat inside of Elizabeth's body.

Then she took off, her head swiveling from side to side she tried to figure out where she was. The road around the lake was long and the snowfall changed the way the streets and the trees appeared. Amanda never stopped. She followed the road until it came to the very beginning of Main Street and she recognized one of the only two gas stations in town. The lights of the corner building were on, but there was not a single person in sight. It was Christmas Eve, after all.

Amanda ran around to the back. She remembered there was a pay phone by the washrooms. The hard, plastic phone was ice cold, but so were her tiny hands so she barely noticed as she grabbed the receiver and put it to her ear. She dialed 911 and waited. And waited…..

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Meanwhile, back at the Cullen residence, Alice was pacing back and forth in the foyer. She had a few items ready at the door in case she saw a vision that would tell her where she needed to be. Esme sat, motionlessly still on the chair at the French writing desk in the hallway. Emmet stood next to her with his large hands on her shoulders for support.

"Alice?" Esme whimpered hoping for news. She peeked through a veil of her soft, wavy hair at her clairvoyant daughter pleadingly. Alice stopped her pacing and shook her head.

"Nothing has been set in stone yet. Liz is hurt very badly, I …I don't think she will survive," Alice spoke at a whisper to dampen the sad words. "Mandi is going to be all right…I think,"

"You think?" Emmet inquired. His sister's psychic abilities were always too confusing for him to grasp. Alice frowned and shrugged her pointy shoulders.

"I hope. She is not a clear picture. I saw her walking in the snow. She was cold. Then she disappeared. She made it out of the car, but then she went to find help. I don't know what she is doing now," Alice explained. There was no way for her to know the future when so many factors were in play.

"Perhaps we should go looking for Amanda," Emmet suggested. Esme sat up straight and took his hand. She looked to Alice for her approval.

"I don't know. I can keep us away from the crash so there is no temptation there, but I don't know Mandi's condition. She's bound to be injured as well. I worry that you might not be able to resist, Em," Alice told him honestly.

"Then you go," he said sheepishly. He knew she was probably right. He was not as controlled at resisting the smell of blood as the rest of his family members. He always was impulsive and a bit reckless. Even Esme, who was a half a century younger had better control over her senses. Emmet would never hurt Amanda intentionally, and he would do anything in his will to avoid hurting the child, but he was a threat.

"Will you—?" Alice began, looking between her brother and her mother. Emmet nodded quickly.

"I will take care of Mom, yes. Go find her!" he insisted. Alice licked her lips and thought for a second. Esme's pleading eyes hoped for some solution and Alice figured she was blind sitting around home, so she might as well be blind out in the snow looking for Amanda during the waiting process. She nodded quickly and grabbed a cell phone from the desk and shoved it deep into her jacket pocket.

"Please be careful!" Esme cried as Alice grabbed a bag of supplies and ran out the door nodding.

Alice didn't look back. She took Emmet's Jeep and went on the search doing the best she could with what she knew. First, she went to the crash, but not near enough to be tempted by the blood. Even if she got too close, Jasper would help keep her mind clear, she figured. Alice decided she would try to pick up Amanda's scent if she was able to. Following footprints was a lost cause in the heavy snowfall. When she reached Hazel Road, she could see far in the distance lights flashing.

She sighed in relief, knowing that an ambulance had made it to the scene and would be taking Elizabeth to Prince George Hospital to be cared for. Alice perked up. She could see Amanda, her mind set, as she trudged through knee-deep snow banks towards the lakefront road. Alice parked the Jeep and ran in the opposite direction to hopefully meet up with the little girl.

It took her almost a half an hour to find Amanda. She had thought she was on the right path when she picked up the girl's scent, but it only led to the phone outside the gas station. Alice knew Amanda had been there, but had no idea of when and where she had taken off to. For all she knew, Amanda had gotten lost on her way back to the crash scene.

Alice finally caught up to Amanda, on an off road leading the opposite direction of the lake. Amanda had gotten lost in the blizzard and turned directions by mistake.

"Mandi! Oh thank you!" Alice prayed as if she was inclined to do so. She had never given much thought to her existence, but she was grateful to whatever miracle caused her to find Amanda. She got down and scooped the little girl into her arms. Amanda stared blankly ahead, as if in a trance. She was already hypothermic, but had held on long enough for Alice to find her before she passed out.

Alice wasted no time. She wrapped Amanda up in a blanket and her own coat and scarf. Amanda had only a few layers on because she had left her coat with Elizabeth over an hour ago. It was one degree below freezing and thankfully the snow was not accompanied by a hard wind, or Amanda might have frozen to death by this time.

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"Dad!" Jasper blurted out as Carlisle came out of the 'restricted area' of Prince George Hospital. Rosalie got up and rushed to her father's side, hoping for news. Elizabeth had been rusted into the Operation Room for emergency surgery as soon as they had arrived. "Alice is on her way. She has Amanda. She saw she would get Amanda here faster in the Jeep than by ambulance," Jasper explained to his father dutifully, who looked up in concern at the mention of Alice driving without a license. He did not like to hear that his fourteen-year-old was driving, but he assumed Alice would not let herself be caught by any police officers and he knew she was a capable driver in spite of her size.

Carlisle ran his hands through his wavy hair and sighed. He had on a pair of mint green scrubs and his stethoscope hanging around his neck. Rosalie was wearing the same clothing from this evening when they had gotten to Elizabeth's bloodied body laying on the street. She had dried blood on her tight, red dress and the cuffs of her beige, wool overcoat. The smell didn't bother the three vampires anymore. They were too concerned for their friend.

"Rose, go to the nurses lounge and ask for a set of clean scrubs. Tell them I sent you and they will help you to find something clean and dry to wear," Carlisle instructed his daughter. She agreed and left, though she was tremendously worried about Amanda.

"Alice predicts Amanda will be fine. When she found her Amanda's future returned, but she doesn't know the extent of her injuries. Alice said there is some blood, however, her injuries appear minor," Jasper said somberly, not sure if it was the right time to dive into the details of Amanda's condition. Carlisle had just spent the last hour performing surgery on Elizabeth's crushed skull and was clearly overwhelmed. Carlisle simply nodded at his son's words, a deep frown line cracked against his smooth brow, as he found the information hard to take in.

"How is Liz?" Jasper asked, concerned. He could feel Carlisle's doubt.

"She is not doing very well," Carlisle admitted. Jasper was silent. There was not very much more to say. "We will have to wait and see. The bleeding is under control at this time, but there is a lot of bruising and swelling present. Dr Peters has taken her for MRI for a few scans now,"

"I am sorry, Dad," Jasper reached out to his father and subtly soothed his aching heart for a moment. He didn't want to tamper with Carlisle's emotions to much, but he hated to see his father suffering.

"So am I," Carlisle replied, "What about the driver of the truck. Did he make it?"

"No…he was DOA, I heard the orderly say," Jasper said solemnly, wishing he could give better news. The silver phone in Jasper's pocket went off on vibrate. He grabbed it quickly and opened it. There was a fast blurb of words on the other end and then he closed his phone again. "That was Alice. She is here and she says you need to come down to the Emergency Room right way!" Jasper spoke fast to relay his mate's message. Alice was in the parking lot, just making her way inside when she made the call. Amanda was no longer coherent, but she foresaw that she would wake soon and only Carlisle would be able to sooth her.

"Amanda!" Carlisle gasped the girl's name breathlessly. He had been so worried about his friend he had nearly forgotten that she had been in the accident as well. And out in below freezing temperatures for a whole hour. He patted Jasper's arm and ran by him. Jasper followed along, but stayed back to not get in his father's way.

Down in the ER they were met with a nearly hyperventilating Alice. Jasper reached for her immediately and she crumbled into his arms. He held her steady. She looked to Carlisle and whimpered. Amanda was unconscious on a gurney in the trauma room through the swinging, glass doors.

"She's going to be okay, Dad, but you will have to be there when she wakes. She will be scared!" Alice cried out as Carlisle nodded and made his way into the room to access Amanda's condition.

*

*

*

The trauma resident was ordering for warm saline to be brought in as a nurse was struggling to get up an intravenous in Amanda's left hand. An intern was putting in a central line in Amanda's chest in an attempt to administer the warm fluids to her hypothermic body faster. Another nurse was cutting away all of Amanda's clothing so they could hook her body up to a monitor to register her vitals. They had the saline hung up and running into the ports in her veins in record time. A doctor was standing over Amanda's cupping an oxygen mask over her mouth and nose.

"Dr Cullen," Dr Mark Smith greeted his fellow doctor as the handsome, vampire made his way to Amanda's side. They had worked together a few times before when Carlisle had been brought into Prince George to perform surgery. The two doctors had a great respect for one another and Carlisle made sure he was not in the way as his colleague examined Amanda, shining his pen light into her eyes. Dr Smith nodded to himself as if pleased with her response.

"She's my friend's little girl, both are patients of mine. They were in a car accident this evening. She must have wandered off to call for help and she got lost in the snow. My daughter brought her in. How is she? What do we know?" he spoke fast. Dr Smith picked up every word. He continued his exam of Amanda as he answered.

"Temperature was 32 C, it is up to 33 C now," he explained, both doctors looked to the monitor where Amanda's vitals was all being displayed now on the screen. Her shoulders, chest, and abdomen were spotted with many electrodes and wires. They got in the way of Dr Smith's hand as he listened to Amanda's chest with his stethocope. There was dark purple bruising accompanying a red rash where her seat belt had cut into her during car's impact.

"Her breath sounds are clear on both sides!" Dr Smith called out for everyone's benefit. He looked to the monitor to see if her blood oxygen level was high enough to stop administer the oxygen. It was. "I want an NG tube in place right away, push the saline and suction to find out if there is any blood in her stomach. I need an ultrasound of her abdomen, stat!"

"On it!" A nurse replied and obeyed the orders, taking the clear, plastic mask off Amanda's face and she began to rip open a sterile bag containing a clear, plastic tube.

"Does she have any drug allergies I should know about?" Dr Smith asked Carlisle as he felt Amanda's limbs to look for any broken bones. The nurses worked around him to clean and bandage the cuts on Amanda's hands from where she has crawled over broken glass to get out of the vehicle.

"No, not that I am aware," Carlisle answered. He took Amanda's hand in his and watched her for any sign she might be waking. A nurse was placing a clear, plastic tube in one of Amanda's nostrils and down the back of her pharynx and esophagus into her stomach. Amanda began to stir and moved her head to try to get away from the nurse's hold on her head, but settled down when the tube was in place.

Carlisle felt a knot twist from within his chest, perhaps his soul was aching, as he stared down at the little girl. He had helped many people over the years and with all his compassion he had never felt this level of anxiety over a patient before. Amanda was family and as he brushed her hair behind her ear he suddenly found himself praying for her well being. It was not unlike Carlisle to pray for a patient or a patient's family, but it was personal this time.

"You are going to be just fine, Sweetie," he whispered to Amanda in case she could hear him. He didn't want her to be afraid.

"Her BP is rising. 75/50mg," The intern said out loud. That was beginning to enter an acceptable range for a child her size and age. It had been quite low when she had first arrived. The intern continued, "Temp's at 34 C,"

Amanda seemed to be doing well, but as her body warmed and her vitals stabilized she began to regain consciousness. She squirmed at the array of hands that were poking and prodding her. She was not fully conscious yet, but she could feel pain now.

Dr Smith asked the nurses to hold Amanda still while he ran the ultra sound wand over her abdomen. He and Carlisle were both pleased to see no out of place, grey spots, indicating internal bleeding, on the corresponding screen. Amanda's vitals got even stronger as her temperature came up and she struggled to open her eyes. She grimaced and reached up to pull out the nasogastric tube from her nose. She had it nearly extracted when Dr Cullen reached for her hand to stop her.

"Uh ah ah, calm down, Sweetheart. You're okay," he told her, taking her hands in his to hold her steady as one of the nurses pushed the tubing back down Amanda's throat. She coughed and squirmed as it forcefully slid past her pharynx and down her esophagus again. For all her effort she could not wriggle from Dr Cullen's steel grasp as the same nurse taped the tubing to her nose and cheek to secure it in place this time. Carlisle leaned over her so she could see his face. She did manage to relax when she recognized him, but she began to cry.

"Aw, honey. Don't cry," the one nurse cooed, stroking Amanda's tangled damp hair that was strewn over the white sheets of the gurney where her head lay. Carlisle's sighed and tried to sooth Amanda's fears with a kind smile. He brushed some of wet hair back off her cheek. She zeroed in on his face. Her purple lips trembled.

"Hey Sweetie. Just calm down and relax. I know you're scared, but if you cooperate with the nurses and doctors it will help us to make you better faster," he told her gently.

"Where's Liz? I want to talk to Liz!" Amanda cried out.

"She's here Amanda. She's upstairs with the doctors having some tests done," Carlisle talked calmly to Amanda. Her chin quivered, but she didn't press the matter.

"I'm cold," she whimpered. Carlisle nodded and thanked the nurse for handing him another blanket. Amanda, with her hands free now, curiously reached to her IV hand as he covered her up with another blanket. He stopped her hand before she could attempt to tug on it. She was not planning on pulling that tube out. She was more distraught from the pressure of the NG tube in her nose. It hurt to swallow. Dr Smith understood her reaction and took a moment from ordering blood tests to come over and talk to her.

"You have to leave that in for now, Amanda. Not for much longer, but we need to make sure you're okay first," he explained. Carlisle nodded in agreement. "You are doing very well,"

"Are you in pain, Amanda?" Carlisle asked. She sniffed, but didn't answer. She was cold and her head was aching, but when she lay still she couldn't feel the bruising on her chest and only the tube in her nose felt strange to her. She tried to reach for the tube again, but Carlisle took her hand into his more firmly and held onto them.

Dr Smith graced Amanda with a brief smile before continuing to reason with the child. "I know you don't like that tube in your nose, but if you pull it out, we will have to put it back in again. Do you understand?"

Amanda was not impressed, but she nodded weakly. Amanda felt tears well in her eyes and a few rolled down her temples and into her ears. She could not understand what was going on, why there were so many things poking into and stuck to her body, or why she needed tests to be done in the first place. Dr Smith was only following protocol in case the scans came back showing she needed emergency surgery.

"Good girl. We are almost done, Amanda," Dr Smith explained as the intern stepped up closer with a friendly smile on his face, "This is Paul. He is going to take you upstairs for some x-rays. When they are done, we might be able to take that tube out from you nose. Okay?"

"You are being so brave. I am very proud of you," Carlisle told her, wiping her teary face with his cold hand.

"Where's Alice?" Amanda whimpered, suddenly remembering early this evening when Alice found her wandering along in the snow. Amanda looked around as the intern prepared her gurney to make its way to the elevator to go upstairs to the CT scan.

"She's in the hallway with Jasper and Rose. Emmet and Esme are on their way here as we speak," he told her. Amanda was comforted a bit knowing she was not alone.

"Who's with Liz?" she asked, as Carlisle moved with the gurney. Carlisle opened his mouth to answer, but he didn't know what to say. Elizabeth was upstairs with a room of strangers at the present time. "You should go be with her. She needs somebody. She is all alone," Amanda pressed, pushing Carlisle's hand away.

"I am going to go check on her right away, Sweetheart. As soon as all of your tests are done. I won't leave you,"

"No, Liz needs you more. I am not scared. Liz might be," Amanda insisted. Alice, Jasper, Esmre, Emmet and Rosalie were all following beside Amanda's gurney now and Rosalie took Amanda's hand where Carlisle was holding it. She was now wearing identical mint green scrubs as her father and rocking them like no other person could have.

"I can stay with Amanda, Dad," she offered. The intern looked torn between turning her down, because it was not policy to let non-hospital personnel in radiology, and smiling like a love-struck fool over her beauty. Emmet noticed and winked at the intern to mess with his head. Carlisle noticed the intern's apprehension.

"This is my daughter, Rosalie, Paul. Please make sure that she is allowed to remain by Amanda's side the entire time. Do you understand me?" he told the intern. "If anyone gives you a hard time you tell them you are following strict orders from Dr Cullen and have them come speak with me if they have concerns,"

"Sure thing, Dr Cullen, Sir," Paul agreed and then he took Amanda into the elevator with Rosalie trailing along side them. It was too full for them all to go up at once so Carlisle, Alice and Jasper all waved goodbye to Amanda. Esme was still a nervous wreck, being supported by Emmet's strong arms. Amanda lifted her head up to see Carlisle before the doors closed.

"Tell Liz I'm sorry! Tell her I do love her too! I was just scared," Amanda cried out pleadingly. Rosalie stroked the side of Amanda's face gently to console her. Carlisle nodded.

"Of course I will, Amanda. I will tell her. You just rest, Sweetheart," he said as the doors closed and Amanda let her head fall back down again. Alice touched her father's arm before she broke news to him about Elizabeth's future.

"Liz is not going to regain consciousness, Dad. I very am sorry,"

Carlisle sighed and shook his head in despair. He had predicted that outcome the moment he had accessed Elizabeth's injuries, but had not wanted to face the facts. He ran his hand through his hair as he contemplated how he was going to tell Amanda the truth about Elizabeth. She would be crushed.

"What are we going to do?" Alice asked. She could see many possible futures and not knowing which one was going to come to term made her nervous.

"Right now I am going to keep my promise to Amanda and go be with Liz. I don't want her to be alone," Carlisle spoke in a faint tone.

"We will be in waiting room seven when you're done," Alice announced. Carlisle nodded and then started off towards the stairs to the fourth floor, ICU.

*

*

*

It was an hour later and Carlisle made his way from Elizabeth's ICU (Intensive Care Unit) to the private waiting room the rest of his family was sitting in. As he entered they all stood. Esme looked mournful. Alice had already shared the bad news with her. It didn't stop her from asking her husband for more information, perhaps in hope that something had changed. She ran to Carlisle's arms.

"How is Liz?" she asked, staring up in to his kind, yet sad eyes.

"There was too much bleeding. We were able to stop it, but the damage has been done. There is swelling in her brain. Even if we were to operate she would not survive the procedure. She is…" he explained. He could not bring himself to say the last few words.

Brain dead.

"Oh, dear Heavens!" Esme cried, covering her mouth. She knew what her husband was trying to tell her. He wrapped her in his arms to sooth her and she buried her face into his chest and wept softly. He couldn't bear to look in the faces of his children either.

"Amanda's sedated, but she will be waking soon, Dad," Alice informed Carlisle, hoping it was okay for her to speak.

Esme let go of her husband and pushed him a way firmly, but lovingly. "You should go to her. We will wait here until you return," she told him. She had already tried to get into the PICU (Pediatric Intensive Care Unit) to be with Amanda, but was turned away. Only one visitor was allowed at a time and Rosalie was still in there with Amanda.

Carlisle nodded and headed out of the waiting room and towards the PICU to check on Amanda. When he arrived and was let by the security he found Rosalie was still by her side, just like she had said she would be. Amanda looked so small lying in the white hospital bed. The NG tube had been removed and so had the central line in her chest. She was dressed in pediatric teddy bear pajamas and had an automatic BP cuff on her arm, a pulse-ox meter on her finger, and the IV taped to her arm and a wrist board. The monitor beside her bed beeped quietly. A few thin wires came out from under her pajama and led to the machine.

"Dr Smith just left," Rosalie said as Carlisle approached Amanda's beside. "Amanda is doing great. They sedated her for the scans, but she is starting to wake now. She has no internal injuries, no broken bones. Just the minor cuts and bruises from the crash,"

"That is good news," Carlisle whispered. He could not bring himself to feel too much relief. Amanda was injured and lying before him, sedated in the PICU, and her supposed to be adoptive mother was in the ICU on life support.

"Her temperature is back to normal," Rosalie informed, "and her BP as well. Dr Smith said that she has to spend the night, but she may be able to leave the hospital tomorrow afternoon if she feels up to it,"

"Thank you, Rose," Carlisle sighed. She stepped aside so he could get a closer look at Amanda. She was stirring as she heard their voices. Her eyes opened cautiously and they peered around for familiarity. They locked in on Carlisle and she tried to sit up, but her head was too heavy still from sedation.

"Just rest, Sweetheart," Carlisle told her, "You're alright,"

"Where's Liz?" Amanda asked right away, her voice cracking. Her pharynx was sore and raw from the tube that had been forced down her esophagus earlier that evening. She still had not forgotten that trauma. Amanda was relieved that it had been removed.

"She is in another room," Carlisle answered Amanda's question honestly. He wanted to leave it at that for the time being, until Amanda was rested fully.

"Is she alright too?" Amanda asked, her voice faint, but determined. Rosalie looked at the ground. She had no idea how her father could do this sort of thing. Telling people that their loved ones had passed away was the worst part of the job.

"She is very sick, Amanda," Carlisle chose his words carefully; hoping to appease Amanda's fears for now, but not directly lie to her. He would not lie. That was not healthy. He only hoped to sooth her for the time being. Until he knew, himself, what to do about Amanda's well being. Surely, he and Esme would take her under their care. It was Amanda's only option now that Elizabeth was technically dead.

"But she is going to be okay, right? I want to go see her. I need to tell her I'm sorry," Amanda continued to beg for more information. As she got worked up, the monitor beeped at a faster pace. Carlisle held her down gently.

"She knows, Amanda," he told the child, "But I am afraid she won't be able to tell you that herself," Amanda's eyes grew very wide, but she waited for him to explain more to her, because she didn't quite understand yet the meaning behind his words. Carlisle took a deep breath and continued, "Elizabeth hit her head very hard Amanda. So hard that no matter how much the other doctors and I tried to repair the damage to her brain, we could not save her,"

"She's dead?" Amanda demanded, unbelieving what Carlisle was telling her. He waited a moment and then nodded.

"She is still breathing, but her brain is no longer functioning. She will never wake up," he gently told the frightened child, " I am so sorry, Amanda. I am so sorry,"

"No! She can't die! You have to save her!" Amanda yelled out. The beeping persisted and a nurse from the other side of the room looked over in concern, but didn't come because she saw that Amanda was in good hands with Dr Cullen.

"Amanda, please, lie back,"

"No! No no no! You can't let her die! Save her! I need her!" Amanda screamed now, she forced herself up to a seated position in spite of the pain from her chest where the seat belt left her bruised and sore. Carlisle held her by her arms to steady her. She grabbed at the green material of his shirt and balled her hands into fists. She was not only upset she was angered now.

"Amanda, I know you are sad. This is a very sad time, but there is no more to be done for Liz," Carlisle softly told her. Rosalie stood next to them, looking around anxiously, feeling nervous about Amanda's outburst.

"YOU can save her! Like you saved Esme and Rosie!" Amanda spit out. Carlisle's face changed from concern to understanding of what she wanted him to do. "You have to!"

"I can't do that, Amanda," Carlisle protested. Amanda shook her head violently, making it ache, but she didn't care.

"Yes, you can! AND YOU WILL!" she told him with determination.

"It is not that simple, Amanda. You don't understand," Rosalie finally piped up, wanting to help ease the situation before Amanda said too much out loud.

"I don't care! I need Liz. She loves me!" Amanda cried. She shook Dr Cullen's shirt like she wanted to shake him. "Do it! I don't care how you do it. SAVE HER SOUL! Please? Please…please,"

"Sweetheart, I can't…" Carlisle regretfully replied to her pleas. Amanda broke down in tears and continued to cry, but the anger was building within her.

"Please. Don't let her die. Save her. I need her! If you don't I will NEVER FORGIVE YOU! I will tell everyone your secret! I will tell!" she threatened, making Rosalie step closer and block the nurse's view of the irate, screaming, child.

"I'm sorry, Amanda. I can't save her. It is not right," Carlisle painfully explained to the little girl. Ethically speaking, Carlisle felt it was not right to bring another vampire into the family without consulting the others. He also didn't think it was wise to create a newborn because Amanda would not be safe around Liz. The last reason Carlisle didn't think he could change Elizabeth was that he presumed her injuries would not be healed with his venom.

"Please?" Amanda begged, her large, glassy blue eyes reached deep into his soul, but Carlisle shook his head, no. Amanda pounded her fists on his chest and screamed, "I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I never want to see you again!"

Carlisle was shocked at her words. Even though she was obviously very emotional, she meant what she was saying. At least, she thought she meant what she was screaming at the kind doctor. He knew she was not going to tell anyone his secret. She didn't know enough to tell the whole truth anyway. If she did blurt out what she knew about the Cullens it was most likely that no one would take her accusations seriously.

"Leave. NOW!" Amanda raged. Rosalie was frozen in shock, not quite sure what to do about Amanda's threats.

Carlisle sighed and pulled himself away from Amanda's beside. He pulled Rosalie over to the bed and said, "Here, take her. Get her to calm down. Stay with her until I send Alice to you with more instructions. Do you understand?" he told his daughter. She nodded and Amanda naturally latched onto Rosalie in Carlisle's absence, too distraught and tired to fight anymore. Rosalie watched as her father breezed out of the PICU. She crawled into bed next to Amanda and soothed the child to sleep. Then she waited to hear from Alice.

*

*

*

Three Days Later…

"Amanda, Darling?" Esme cooed, turning around from the front passenger seat of Carlisle's black Mercedes. They had been on the road for hours. Rosalie drove, and Alice sat in the back seat, letting Amanda's head rest in her hard, stone lap. The little girl had not spoken in the last forty-eight hours since she was released from the hospital. She had not heard or seen from Dr Cullen since that time either.

"Maybe just some juice?" Alice said hopefully, stroking Amanda's hair. Esme watched Amanda for a reaction, but Amanda continued to stare at the back of Rosalie's seat as they drove the long stretch of highway between Prince George, B.C. and Denali, Alaska. It was nearly sixteen hundred kilometers long and the trip should take approximately sixteen hours to drive, but Rosalie's need for speed had them a few hours ahead of schedule.

"Leave her be," Rosalie told her sister and mother. She was getting tired of them pampering Amanda. Rosalie didn't begrudge Amanda the coddling because she understood the trauma the child had been through, but she was a little bit unhappy with the turn of events herself. Rosalie liked Amanda, but she did not like change; a part of her resented Amanda for bringing so much trouble into their lives.

"When you feel like you want something, Darling, you just ask," Esme told Amanda and she hesitantly turned around to face the front. Amanda didn't respond. She didn't move, either. Her body was covered in cuts and bruises from the accident. The mark left by the seat belt hurt her the most, as well as site where the doctor had placed her central line. Alice could tell Amanda was not feeling well so she was careful not to move her too much and simply stroked Amanda's long, dirty-blonde hair.

"Everything will work itself out, Mandi," she talked down to Amanda. "I know it will,"

"You don't know that yet!" Rosalie snapped. Alice looked up into the rear view mirror and caught her sister's eyes. She glared back and then focused on Amanda again.

"Yes, I do," she said indignantly and then began to babble away to Amanda. "Anyway...you will love Alaska! It is a very pretty place. We have good friends who live there in Denali. They are like us, a sort of extended family in a way. Kate is fun! She has a sparky personality! Truly electrifying! You will like her. Tanya is a nice girl too. A bit of a skank, but-"

"Alice!" Esme corrected her daughter's lack of tact.

"Oops…sorry, Mom," Alice apologized briefly and then turned to Amanda again, who looked to be listening to Alice for a change. "Anyway, they like their men. That is all I'm saying…"

"Nice choice of words, Alice!" Rosalie scoffed sarcastically as Esme sighed and mumbled something about strength and then she prayed for some.

"Well, Amanda will see for herself," Alice argued. Amanda scrunched up her face and thought. She was unsettled with being ripped from her home in Kipta, the only town she had ever known, and being shipped to Alaska for an undetermined length of time was not what she wanted. Alice continued to ramble to Amanda, "Irina is...well...moody, but she is not so bad once you get to know her,"

"She is just upset because this while arrangement goes against the grain for our kind," Rosalie tried to defend Irina, who was not happy to get involved with the human child. She feared the Vampire Government more than the rest of the Cullen's extended family did. "I mean…they could kill us for-"

"Carlisle has dealt with that," Esme cut off her blonde daughter, "Aro has granted us a pass for the sake that Amanda is kin of mine. What's done is done. We all have to live with the choice our family has made, for better or for worse. We will not speak of it again. Do you hear me?" Esme knew they had been lucky that Carlisle had been a good friend of Aro, the Volturi Leader. He unwillingly made an exception to the rules for Carlisle's sake.

"Yes, Ma'am," Rosalie agreed, knowing she touched on a sensitive spot. She had thought it was a mistake for her father to contact Aro in regards to Amanda. However, she was glad to be wrong. Aro was being very lenient with their family under these circumstances.

Amanda didn't understand. She rubbed her face tiredly, trying to rid all the confusion from the last few days out of her mind. She was unaware of the date, in fact. Christmas had been forgotten in the haste of packing and leaving Kipta. Amanda had been asleep for most of the last several days as it was. Carlisle had given Rosalie a bottle of sedatives to give her to help her get some rest.

"As I was saying," Alice chirped up again. It made her feel better to talk positively to Amanda, even if the mood in the car was not as pleasant. Alice figured it couldn't hurt to inform Amanda of where they were going and whom they were going to be staying with. "Irina, Kate, and Tanya are sisters. Then there is Carmen and Eleazar. Carmen is so sweet, Amanda, just like Mom! You will like her!"

"They have graciously invited us into their home," Esme added, "We are fortunate they are willing to put us up during this tense time,"

Rosalie nodded and Amanda sighed heavily, still not sure what was going on around her. It was like the Cullens were speaking in code. Ever since she screamed and begged Dr Cullen to save Elizabeth that night in the hospital and he refused, she had not seen him. That confused her. Usually, he was always there, trying to help her.

'_Why did he abandon me now?'_ Amanda wondered. She thought he might be staying away because she had told him she would never forgive him if he let Elizabeth die. She had told him she hated him. Amanda felt a bit guilty for threatening to tell their secret if he didn't save Elizabeth. It had not been fair of her. Elizabeth was already dead. That is what everyone kept saying.

She closed her eyes to drown out Alice's constant twittering and tried to erase the past days and remember what it was like to be happy. She had been happy with Elizabeth, even if they had only lived together for a couple of months. _'Perhaps that is all I deserve,'_

*

*

*

Meanwhile, back in Kipta at the lake house, Dr Cullen and his two boys were sitting in the dark, waiting. Elizabeth had pronounced dead officially at 1am Christmas morning at the hospital in Prince George. The plug was pulled on the machine that kept her breathing and her heart stopped a minute later.

Or that is what Dr Cullen told his fellow physicians when they heard the news of his friend's passing. Unbeknownst to the overworked, understaffed residents at the hospital, Carlisle had gotten away with signing Elizabeth's certificate of death without taking her off life support. With some help from his two sons, they managed to take Elizabeth's body from her room, and instead of to the morgue, they loaded her into Emmet's Jeep. It was set up and fully stocked with the medical equipment needed to transfer Elizabeth's body back to the lake house.

It had been days since they arrived home. Elizabeth's heart continued to beat with aid and when the time was right, Dr Cullen took Elizabeth's life into his own hands and bit her. Saving Elizabeth was a long shot. Technically brain dead, the likelihood of her surviving his bite was slim. Most of his family had agreed for him to at least try to change Elizabeth, for Amanda's sake.

It was not until a day after the bite, that Elizabeth suddenly began to breathe on her own. That is when they knew that there was hope for her transformation. The venom was healing her. It was a miracle…and a curse.

Now, after nearly seventy-six hours of waiting, Elizabeth's permanently still, yet tortured body began to twitch ever so slightly. Carlisle turned to his young son. Jasper nodded, sensing that the pain he had been feeling from her was lessening now. Emmet guarded the door. The windows of the lake house basement suite were barred up, though if a newborn vampire wanted to, they could escape easily.

It was time.

With no warning, Elizabeth's heart gave it's final beat and her eyes flew open. Where they were once a peaceful, soft grey color they were aflame with bloodlust. She gasped and shot up to her feet in the same second, too fast for any of the Cullen men to stop her. She stood, crouched, on the table were she had died, her orange hair a blaze around her porcelain, alabaster face. She was reborn and she was fierce!

"Where is Amanda?"

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**THE END OF PART ONE**

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**Thank you for reading. Please Review!**


	24. Moving Day

**PART TWO**

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**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Twenty-Four**

|Moving Day|

Denali, Alaska. Three Years Later….

"Amanda?" Esme called out as she patiently walked from room to room of Tanya, Kate, and Irina's large home. It was more rustic a house than Esme liked, but the furnishings were expensive so Esme had to grin and bear the rugged wood décor, bear skin rugs, and tacky lamps that were on display in every room. The Denali Sisters were not known for their housekeeping skills. They liked their men, and their men liked them. The house was set up to put their men at ease while they got to 'know each other' a little bit better.

"Amanda?!" Esme called out a little bit louder. She had asked Amanda nicely, for the fourth time, to clean up her room and pack the items she wanted to take with her on their upcoming move. She was starting to get suspicious that her granddaughter was hiding, ignoring, or disobeying her. All of which were very plausible scenarios. Amanda was just as much the troublemaker as she once was. She had not taken the news of Elizabeth's immortality very well. In fact, she had not taken to learning the whole truth about the Cullen's immortal condition very well either.

Esme and Carlisle had a lot of angst to put up from, now twelve-year-old, Amanda. Esme was a perpetual worrier and she fussed over Amanda like she was made of the most delicate, thin glass that could break down at any time. She tried to be a disciplinarian to Amanda, but in her heart she could not be too tough on the girl. Carlisle was a lot better at dealing with Amanda's temperament. He never lost his calm composure when dealing with her, but he was firm and demanded her to obey him.

"_She will respect you more if you are firm with her. She needs discipline in her life just as much as she needs love, Honey,"_ he would remind Esme. His wife would smile and nod. He knew how hard it was for her to watch Amanda in pain. Carlisle understood it was difficult for Amanda to adjust to a new lifestyle. She was a human child in a vampire world. Amanda was tired of hearing how rare that was and they would all be killed if she told anyone outside their family the truth. She hated being the weakling. Her human traits made her more vulnerable, and therefore, less willing to want to show her vulnerabilities.

Amanda had not been able to visit Elizabeth in all the time they had spent in Alaska. Not in person, anyhow. Only by phone, mail, and Internet was she in contact with Elizabeth on a regular basis. At first, she had to wait for nearly six months to speak with her adoptive mother via Internet web camera. By that time, Elizabeth's bloodshot eyes had toned down to an even amber color, much like the other Cullen family members.

It had taken Elizabeth by great surprise to be reborn a vampire. She was in denial for days after she woke from the torturous pain. If it had not have been for her trust in Carlisle, she would have ripped Emmet's head off when he tried to stop her from seeking Amanda's whereabouts that first day when she came into her new life. Carlisle was able to calm her down and explain to her what was happening. As soon as Elizabeth heard that Amanda was alive and well, with Esme and the girls, she relaxed and listened to her friend's story, and trusted him for the decision he made to save her from mortal death.

"_I did it for Amanda," _Carlisle had told her, _"She still needs you, Liz. She told me to tell you that she loves you."_

"_I already knew,"_ had been Elizabeth's response, followed by her first smile in her new vampire life.

Now, three years later, it was time to make the transition from living apart to combining their family again. Carlisle and Esme had been taking turns caring for Amanda while the other would keep a watchful eye on Elizabeth's training. The Cullen kids took turns, rotating their time between Kipta and Denali at either home. The only two who never were in close contact were Amanda and Elizabeth. The temptation of Amanda's human blood would have been too much for Elizabeth to resist.

As much as she wanted to see Amanda and hold her again, she had come to realize how dangerous she truly was after a close call. In her first year as a bloodthirsty vampire, she had nearly killed a door-to-door salesman. Thankfully, Emmet stopped her before she made it too the door. She ripped through two walls before hand, though. The salesman heard the ruckus and hurried away just in the nick of time.

Elizabeth had kept herself hidden in the Lake House for two and half years after that. She only went out to hunt when a Cullen family member was there to supervise her. She had to keep up with the story that she had died. No one from Kipta knew she had survived and still lived in the Cullen's home. She had been taking day trips to other towns in the last six months to practice being around the scent of human blood so she could build resistance to it. Soon, she would try to live in a house with Amanda. It would be a huge challenge, but one she was prepared to commit to. Elizabeth didn't think she would be able to hurt Amanda even if she felt the bloodlust. Carlisle and Esme were hopeful, but cautious. If the upcoming move proved too much for Elizabeth, they would have to split up again.

The story about Amanda was that she had been sent to live with a nice, young couple in Vancouver. None of the town's folk cared enough to look into that story. They merely gossiped about the accident like it was them who lost a loved one. They milked the story to make themselves feel important. It was despicable. Only Tyler Davis truly mourned losing his best friend. He waited for months to hear from her, but he never did. It broke his heart.

Amanda, on the other end, had wanted very much to write to her best friend, but she was forbidden. It would have been very bad to have Tyler, or his parents, find out she was not really living in Vancouver, but with the Cullens instead, under 'official/unofficial, legal/illegal documentation naming her Esme and Carlisle's niece. She took on the name, Amanda Roth, daughter of Elizabeth and Cole Roth.

Amanda's features, as she aged, were becoming more like her, real life, grandmother's. Her hair was not as dark, it was somewhere in between Esme and Carlisle's color. People they ran into in town often commented the uncanny resemblance between Amanda and Dr and Mrs Cullen. Still, the story remained that Cole was Esme's brother, her maiden name being Roth as well and Amanda was their niece. It would have been more believable to say she was their child than saying she was a niece, but the hope was to one day reunite Elizabeth and Amanda so the Cullens adapted to this story.

For the last three years they had been pretending that Elizabeth was too ill to care for Amanda, which was only half a lie. However, starting next week, Amanda would be reunited with Elizabeth and therefore, have to go along with the story that Elizabeth was her biological mother and the reason she looked so much like her Aunt Esme was because of the Roth genes. Esme and Elizabeth were sisters now, even if not by blood. They were best friends. Both woman loved Amanda more than their own lives.

Despite Amanda's protests, she begrudgingly went along with the lies. She had no other choice. She had no place else to go. Amanda secretly held out hope that Elizabeth still loved her and wanted her. The Cullens were good to her, but she always felt like a piece of her was missing since the night she last saw Elizabeth alive. It was a three year denial she had going, not quite excepting that her current family was made up of vampires. It was hard for her to share her feelings with them because she felt like the outsider. Only Jasper really knew that she missed the generously kind, loyal red head that had almost been her mother.

"Uh…she is getting more upset, Amanda," Jasper warned, "You might want to go clean your room now."

Amanda heaved a sigh kicked the back of the sofa she wedged beside. Irina, who was sitting on the sofa, grumbled something under her breath. She never had gotten comfortable living with a human child.

"She's over here!" Irina called to Esme, looking up from her book to give Amanda an icy stare. Tanya was painting Kate's nails and took a moment to give her cold sister a disapproving frown. Tanya was of the mind that kids should be kids and she liked Amanda's feisty, defiant nature. Kate also admired Amanda's strong personality. She thought it was impressive how perseverant Amanda was in the face of all the tragedy that had struck her.

Jasper didn't like to get involved in Amanda's disputes with his parents. He only spoke up in attempt to help Amanda escape punishment. Alice and Emmet often found themselves pulled into Amanda's schemes. They were mentally a lot less mature than their other vampire siblings. Even Rosalie, who often tried to reason with Amanda, sometimes found herself siding with the human girl.

"Amanda?!" Esme's voice rang out for the third time in the last minute. Then she appeared through the arc-way joining the living room to a large foyer. "Ah, there you are! What are you doing? Did you not hear me?" she asked when she spotted Amanda sitting on the floor beside the sofa.

"Nope," Amanda fibbed flatly, rubbing the stone on her sliver bracelet. The rock was a deep midnight blue color. It changed colors often, but not always by mood, just by temperature, Amanda had realized over the years. Amanda thought it was a cheap trinket, but the fact that it had been her mother's made her wear it on occasion.

Jasper tucked his chin to his chest and glanced at the wall as she lied. Irina scoffed at Amanda's blatant disobedience.

"Well, hop to it! You have to have that room of yours cleaned out in a few hours. There will be no time in the morning. We leave first thing," Esme reminded Amanda, her tone a bit more gentle then her shrill bellows a few minutes ago. She was not a fool. She knew Amanda was outwardly defying her commands, but she did not have the heart to be too strict with the child. Especially now, when another life-altering change was uprooting Amanda's life once again.

"I just have to throw everything into boxes," Amanda argued.

"I will help you," Esme smiled pleasantly. "Please do it now." Amanda sighed and got up. She trudged passed Esme and through the arc between the East and West wings of the house. Esme gave Irina a smile, but Irina gave her an icy glare and turned away. For Irina, moving day was not coming fast enough.

*

*

*

Esme packed up most of Amanda's clothes, despite Alice's wishes that Amanda have 'all new' when they arrived in the new city. Amanda did share some of this wish with Alice. She was not nearly as into fashion as her pixie-like cousin, but she did like to dress a certain way. Amanda was just as thin as Alice at this stage of her development, but with a bit more shape and several inches of height difference between them. Alice was fourteen when she was changed, but she looked the same age as Amanda these days because of her dainty size.

Amanda hastily tossed all the items she wanted to take with her to their new home into the boxes sitting on the floor of her bedroom. Esme had told her that her room at the new house was already furnished, so Amanda only needed to bring her clothes, books, toys, etc. Amanda was not overly possessive. She had her collection of books and a favorite pillow that she couldn't sleep without. Other then her iPod, a couple pairs of goggles, her expensive swim suits, and all her swimming medals she could care less about trinkets or stuffed animals she had been given as gifts over the years.

Swimming was her passion now. She had taken swimming lessons when she first got to Alaska, and a few months later she was on a team. She was one of Denali Middle's best swimmers now. Her tall, thin form was perfect for moving speedily through the water. Her coach was sad to lose her talent on his team. Amanda was also a bit annoyed she had to pick up and leave after finally getting some semblance of a life going in Denali.

They were moving to Vancouver Island, to a small city called Port Alberni. A few Kilometers from the city was Sproat Lake, where their new home was situated. Port Alberni was a larger city then Kipta. It had its own shopping district and hospital, plus several schools to choose from. The only highlight Amanda could see was that they had a bigger swim team than Denali and she would get to go to a lot more important meets being so close to Vancouver City.

Alice was young enough to attend Port Alberni Middle School with Amanda. They would both continue the seventh grade there. Alice did not mind pretending to be younger than she was so she could keep Amanda company for the next six years of her school career. Rosalie, Emmet, and Jasper were starting out as juniors at the coinciding High School. They were not impressed to be placed into school again, for the thirteenth time, but they had no choice if they wanted their family to fit in to their new town. Rosalie was pleased that they would only have to go to school for two years before they would graduate and move on with other goals. Rosalie wanted to work with her father to practice controlling her bloodlust around sick humans. She had done so well the night of Elizabeth's death that she had decided that medicine was something she really wanted to get into.

Amanda watched how her aunt and uncle looked at Rosalie whenever she was lit up talking about medicine. They were so proud of their daughter. They were proud of all their children. Alice, for her kind heart and helpful ways. Jasper shared the same compassionate, calm, gentlemanly traits as his adopted father and when Elizabeth was a newborn he and his brother Emmet had stepped up to keep her from harming herself or others. Amanda saw how much love Carlisle and Esme had for their kids and she secretly longed to make them proud of her too.

"Hey Runt!" Emmet chanted and he tossed a stuffed bear at Amanda's head lightly. She looked up as it bumped her in the face and fell to the floor.

"I'm not amused," Amanda said dully, but with a touch of jest.

"Sure ya are!" Emmet said with a laugh and then relayed the message he came to tell her, "Pops told me to tell you that your dinner is on the table and that you had better come eat it before it gets cold. I told him it didn't matter since it would taste like chunks of bark mulch whether it was hot or cold, but he still insisted I come gather you for your routine, human meal!"

Amanda couldn't help but smile at her adopted cousin's goofy banter. She put her hands on her hips defiantly and gave him a 'come and get me' grin. Emmet, never to back down from a challenge, whisked into the room and before Amanda could move he had her swung over his shoulder and in the kitchen. He plopped her down on the hard, tiled floor and she ungracefully stumbled to find a chair with a huge, dopey grin on her face. She liked the rush of vampire speed. That did amused her!

"Emmet," Esme said his name disapprovingly. Every once and a while Amanda would bang into something and get a bruise or scrap a knee when Emmet played too rough with her, so Esme hated to see them goofing off together. He accidentally cracked one of her ribs last year when Amanda and he had been play fighting and he was still being reminded of that incident.

"Aw, Come on Mom! She likes it!" Emmet protested. Amanda drunkenly fell into a chair at the table and scooted herself forward. She smiled and nodded as Carlisle set a plate in front of her.

"Seriously?!" Amanda asked quietly when she looked at her food. She saw orange on her plate and grimaced as she singled them out and moved them to the side of her plate with her fork. "How many times do I have to tell you people that I hate carrots?"

"It was a package of frozen, mixed vegetables, Dear," Esme said softly with a smile. Amanda's attitude these days was not always solely directed at them to be nasty. Esme thought it was a stage all children go through when they are about to become teenagers. It grew more and more pronounced as Amanda realized she was not going anywhere. She had to accept that the strange family of vampires was her family now. Amanda was comfortable enough with the Cullens to talk plainly with them, whether they approved of her attitude or not.

"I suppose we could call up 'Green Giant' and demand they stop putting carrots in their mixed bag, but I doubt they would go for that," Carlisle teased. Amanda didn't respond. She found his sense of humor old and fuddy-duddyish. At least he and Esme didn't try to force her to eat cooked carrots anymore. They had given up on that struggle.

"Did you finish packing your things, Amanda?" Esme asked kindly. Amanda sighed a heavy sigh and pursed her lips. She still had to pack her swimming medals and trophies. She chewed on a bit of chicken. It was not very moist and had very little flavor. When she swallowed she put her fork down, uninterested in the meal.

She took the time to watch Carlisle and Esme work together to clean up the kitchen. He would pass her something and they would stop and share a kiss. Emmet noticed her perplexed, yet mildly amused expression as she watched the loving couple canoodle with each other. He picked up a carrot from Amanda's plate and flicked it at his parents and then looked away. It took Amanda too long to figure out what he was doing. The carrot hit Carlisle in the side of his head.

"Amanda!" Carlisle chastised. Amanda was stunned. Her mouth dropped open and she looked around for Emmet, who had slipped out of the room somehow. They had an ongoing war of pulling pranks on each other since the day of her ninth birthday party when she made him eat cake and then in return he told on her for disobeying Elizabeth. Usually, Emmet had the one up on Amanda, but she liked to get him into trouble as well.

"It was Em, I swear it!" Amanda surrendered, her hands in the air.

"Don't swear, Sweetheart," Carlisle corrected with a gentle, forgiving smile. Esme tried to hide her grin, but was unsuccessful. She knew Emmet could very well have been behind this carrot attack.

"Okay, but I didn't do it!" Amanda stated and then added in a soft, ominous voice, "This time..." Carlisle smiled again and ignored her comment. Esme stepped up beside Amanda and looked at her plate, still half covered with food. Amanda bent her head back to face Esme. "I'm not that hungry," she explained. Amanda was being honest. She was not really in the mood to eat. She was still resenting that tomorrow was moving day. "Can I just finish packing and go to bed?"

"Of course, Darling," Esme cooed. She looked to Amanda's plate once more and touched the side. "Are you sure you are finished eating?"

"I'm sure," Amanda said blandly and she got up and walked slowly out of the room. Normally, she tidied up after herself, but she was not feeling very well. She was anxious about making another change in her life. Esme picked up the plate of food and took it to the garburator to dump the leftover since no one in the house would be eating them. Carlisle slipped up behind her and put his hands on her shoulders.

"She's going to be fine, Love," he whispered.

"Yes," Esme agreed, though not very convincingly. Carlisle kissed the back of her head and rubbed her arms a few times in comfort. This was going to be a new experience for their whole family. It would not be an easy road to journey.

*

*

*

It was not even light out yet. Amanda could hear a faint knock on her bedroom door and then it clicked opened. A bit of light filed in from the hallway and Amanda tightened her eyes shut even more to try to escape it.

"It's time to get up, Sweetheart," Carlisle told her. "We need to get on the road in thirty minutes."

Amanda moaned and shoved her face onto her pillow.

"It's too early!" she whined, it came out garbled, but Carlisle understood the gist of her complaint.

"It is early. Unfortunately, we have a whole day of driving if we want to make it to Vancouver Island by this time tomorrow morning. It is going to be a long day," he explained. "Esme took the rest of your things and packed them for you. She and Jasper loaded up the moving truck and left late last night after you went to bed to get a head start on the unpacking when they arrive. Emmet left in the Jeep a few minutes after they did."

Amanda took a deep breath, held it for a few seconds, and then let it out. She lifted her face from her pillow and blew a clump of her hair from her face.

"I thought I was riding with Em!" Amanda stated as fact. She had hoped she would be, anyway. Emmet had told her she could. A long road trip would be a lot more adventurous and fun with her big, playful cousin who always gave her what she wanted. Alice was like Emmet in that way as well. She wanted so badly to be Amanda's best friend and to be as human as she could so she would do as Amanda instructed, sometimes getting the two of them into mischief. It was too bad Alice and Rosalie were already in Port Alberni with Elizabeth because a road trip would a lot more fun with one of her cousins to goof around with.

"Sorry, no. Esme and I felt it would be safer for you to travel with me," Carlisle offered Amanda the truth gently. Then he grinned to himself and shared this anecdote, "Alice saw Emmet being distracted with you in the vehicle and he would have ended up taking you on a detour towards Alberta."

Amanda moaned and plummeted her face back into her pillow. Carlisle smiled lightly to himself and patted her back softly in condolence.

"It will be fun. Just you and me! We can sing along to the classics on the radio!" he joked and his usual chuckle then followed his words. "Won't that be fun?" Amanda ignored his lame sense of humor. "I will leave you to get yourself ready and meet you downstairs in a half an hour. Carmen and the others are all anxious to see you off. Cheer up, Sweetheart. It will make all the difference." he spoke thoughtfully as he left her room to give her some time to wake up on her own.

After Amanda heard the door click shut, she flipped over dramatically onto her back and stared at the ceiling. _'It will make all the difference!'_ Amanda mouthed sarcastically. She had learned over the years that vampires had excellent hearing and she had to be careful not to whisper insults behind their backs. It had taken her a full three months living with them for her to finally learn that. Jasper felt badly for her when she would get caught mouthing off behind their backs, so he let her in on the secret.

Thirty minutes later, Amanda was out of the shower, her hair was tied back in a damp bun, and she was dressed. She decided to wear stretchy, dark blue jeans and a cream, long sleeved turtleneck with pair of cream, fur moccasins that Alice had given her for her birthday a month ago. She found her favorite shoulder bag and shoved her iPod, her lip chap, and a few Teen Magazines inside. She scanned her Denali bedroom and shivered at its emptiness. She picked up her favorite pillow and the soft, polyester throw on her bed and hauled them downstairs to take on the road with her. The grandfather clock in the hall donged five times. She glared at it for a moment and then heard her name.

"Amanda, time to go!" Carlisle called in a peaceful tone. Amanda dragged her feet as she walked to the front door where she was met with the entire Denali Coven. Eleazar and Irina were there only to be polite. Irina did not like Amanda and Eleazar was completely neutral in his feelings for her. He was always worried that Aro, the Volturi President, would change his mind about Amanda one day and come to have them all eviscerated. It hadn't happened yet. Today was a nice relief for him to finally be rid of this full-time burden.

"Oh, Bebé Linda," Carman cooed and she pulled Amanda ferociously, yet gently into a tight hug. She cupped Amanda's face with her hands and got one last good look at Amanda, who she, from day one, had always referred to as 'Pretty Baby'. She treated Amanda like her own child and, like Esme, thought Amanda was one of the most stunning humans she had ever laid eyes on. It embarrassed Amanda, and made Rosalie jealous, whenever Carmen referred to her as being beautiful. She felt like the ugly duckling compared to the group of stunning immortals she was constantly surrounded by.

"I have made you a lunch. All your favorites," Carmen told Amanda with sad eyes. She would miss the girl. Amanda liked the dark haired, slightly olive skinned, vampire. She was always pleasant and always respected Amanda's space and didn't force anything on her. She would ask Amanda nicely and Amanda would do whatever Carmen asked.

"Thanks, Carmen," Amanda replied. She gave Carmen another hug. Carmen made a humming sound as she squeezed Amanda and shut her eyes.

"Let us have a moment with her too, Carmen. You're monopolizing the child," Kate teased. Tanya and Kate both came and ripped Amanda away from Carmen and shared a joint hug with the girl. Kate was careful to not shock Amanda. On a few past occasions Amanda had accidentally bumped Kate and gotten zapped. Kate had a electrifying sort of talent where her skin sent out shock waves when touched. Kate had felt terrible when the worse of the two times left Amanda unconscious for all of thirty seconds. Amanda was fine a few minutes later, but she liked to guilt Kate about it when she needed a favor.

"We are going to miss playing around with you, Kiddo!" Kate said.

"I sure hope you have learned some important tips about life and love from us!" Tanya joked and she let Amanda go. Amanda nodded sheepishly. She shuddered remembering the time she walked in on Tanya with one of her men. She definitely had caught an eyeful there, one that Esme was not pleased about. "Remember…if they don't respect you, then they are losers!" Tanya added.

"Yep!" was all Amanda could think to reply. Kate giggled.

"You are going to drive all those teen boys crazy with your looks, Child. I can't wait for you to call me with the details! You know that you can call us to talk about boys anytime you want, don't you?" Kate complimented Amanda with glee. Tanya nodded merrily in agreement with her sister.

"Heh hem," Carlisle cleared his throat, getting a bit uncomfortable with the conversation that labeled Amanda as a hormonal, preteen. He knew that she was growing up and the time of 'boys' was bound to come, but he didn't like the Denali sisters putting preemptive ideas in Amanda's head. Amanda was quite tall for her age. She was just a few inches shorter than Esme and Rosalie, but a lot thinner and less shapely. Still, her figure was coming and her face was beautiful like Esme's. Amanda could have passed for fourteen or fifteen if she wore make up and the right clothing.

"Right, of course," Tanya straightened out and tried to put on a serious face. Kate followed along. Carlisle tried not to smile, though he was a bit entertained. Amanda's cheeks flushed from embarrassment.

"Boys are gross. Don't touch boys," Kate said with fake seriousness. She winked at Amanda and grinned with half of her mouth.

"We need to get on the road, I am afraid. I am sorry to break up this moment of sound advice," Carlisle said to move things along. Irina gave a stiff smile.

"Goodbye, Amanda. Safe journey," she said. Amanda nodded and forced a smile, but didn't show any teeth. There was no point pretending that she liked the pale-blonde Denali sister. Amanda thought she was a bitch! Eleazar raised his hand up in a waving gesture so Amanda did the same as Carlisle took her few items and put them in the passenger seat of his Mercedes for her. Carmen blew a kiss and held back her sadness. She was going to miss Amanda.

"We will come visit soon, once you are settled," Carmen told Amanda as Carlisle held the passenger side door for her. She nodded and got inside.

"Bye," Amanda squeaked. It was dusk so it was hard to see very well, so she waved in the general direction of the group that was there to see her departure.

"Be a good girl, Amanda. Don't make Carlisle into even more of an old man than he already is!" Kate joked as Carlisle shut Amanda's door and gave Kate a smile and a headshake. Kate giggled. Amanda smiled and nodded. She thought Carlisle acted like an old man, too.

"You know we adore you, Carlisle, but go easy on the kid, okay? She is young. Let her have some fun too!" Tanya told him as he went around to the driver side door. He bowed his head at his friends and smiled.

"Thank you for all your hospitality. My family is eternally grateful to yours for everything that you have done to accommodate us over the last three years. We will be in touch and would love for you to come visit us whenever you would like. Don't be shy!"

"We won't be!" Tanya, Carmen, and Kate all said in sync. They all gave one finally wave, goodbye, Amanda waved back from behind the tinted window, knowing they could see her through the glass with their super sight. Carlisle got inside the car and he and Amanda began to head south toward Vancouver. Amanda fell back asleep with her iPod buds in her ears after an hour on the road. Carlisle let her have her quiet time, since he knew far too well that Amanda was prone to irritability when she was overtired.

*

*

*

Amanda woke up, feeling warm and stiff. The sun was shinning through the sunroof and it was bright and hot even though it was below zero temperatures outside. It was the middle of January and there was snow covering every inch of land surrounding the long stretch of highway.

"Good morning," Carlisle welcomed. Amanda turned her face to him and squinted. He was very bright, lit up by the sunshine that made its way through the tinted windshield. She tried to imagine what he would look like if the window weren't tinted. Alice showed her once how they glisten in the sunlight. It was like something out of a fantasy novel.

"How much longer?" Amanda mumbled, sleepily. Carlisle laughed and threw his head back for a moment. Amanda was not impressed. She was seriously hoping she had slept away the whole twenty-four hour drive.

"We still have quite a ways to go, Dear."

"So…how long?" Amanda pressed, stretching out her legs and placing her arms on the roof. She yawned dramatically and then waited for him to answer.

"It is nearly Noon," He told her, keeping his eyes on the road. "We have been on the road for six hours. Another eighteen more to go, approximately."

Amanda moaned and looked sadly out the window at the bright, white snow that flashed by them. She couldn't believe she had only slept away six and a half hours of the trip. She felt a bit hungry and her stomach was panging for food. She unbuckled her seat belt and flipped around onto her knees and leaned into the back seat to find the cooler in the back. Carlisle opened his mouth to say something, but he realized she had no other choice. He could not pull over every time she had to eat.

Amanda pulled out a bottle of orange juice and an apple. She didn't like the looks of the sandwiches Carmen had packed. The ice had melted a bit and seeped through a hole in the bag and made them soggy. She slid back into her seat and began to munch on the apple. Carlisle tapped on her seat belt as a reminder and she rolled her eyes and did it back up.

"You know, we are going to have to stop soon? I think I'm going to need to use a restroom pretty quickly!" Amanda informed her uncle.

"Yes, of course. Also, we will need to fill up the car with gasoline. I may ask for your assistance to do so if there is not very much shade at the station," Carlisle said calmly. He wore a faint smile on his lips as he drove, almost in perfect stillness, down the road. Amanda sighed and nodded. She bit into her apple again and waited for the next town to come so they could make a pit stop.

Finally, they pulled into a small gas station off the highway and Amanda ran inside to use the public washroom. When she came back out she hurried over to the driver's side. There was a small overlay to the building, but the sunshine was so bright that Carlisle didn't want to chance being seen. Amanda knew from other occasions traveling with the Cullens how to fill up a gas tank and which fuel to use. She got to work and when she was done filling the car Carlisle rolled his window down a crack and handed Amanda his wallet.

"Sweet!" Amanda said with a big smile. "Can I buy some food too?" She was rarely allowed junk food, but she was hoping that he would allow her to have some for the road trip.

"I believe Carmen packed you a lunch of healthy snacks," Carlisle engaged Amanda's attention. She felt a bit powerful standing outside in the bright of day holding his wallet, knowing he couldn't come after her if he didn't want to risk being seen by the attendants and few locals that were hanging outside the station.

"She did, but the sandwiches are ruined," Amanda stated with a bit of a whine to her voice.

"You know how your mother, Esme, and I feel about sugary foods, Amanda," Carlisle contemplated out loud. Amanda could tell he was considering it so she didn't balk at the fact he had called Elizabeth her mother. It was still strange for her to hear that term used out loud in reference to herself. She had been without a real mother for too long. She thought of Esme as more of a mother figure these days then Elizabeth.

"Please! You said this would be a FUN trip and so far it has been painfully dull!" Amanda urged.

"Well, you've been sleeping for the majority of it, so it wasn't fun for me either," Carlisle replied kindly and with a chuckle he tacked on, "I was lonely." Amanda didn't respond to his boring attempt to joke and waited for the go ahead from him. Carlisle sighed and waved his hand at her to go and said, "All right, buy whatever you'd like, Dear. I suppose a treat every now and again won't hurt."

"Yessss," Amanda hissed happily and she hurried inside to get some snacks for the road and to pay for the gasoline. Carlisle waited patiently for her return. When she did she roughly got back into her seat and slammed the door and tossed his wallet to him. He caught it in mid air. "Thanks," Amanda said and she opened a white, plastic bag and pulled out giant tootsie roll, a kit kat bar, and a bag of jalapeño and cheddar flavored chips. Carlisle puffed a short laugh and didn't comment on her junk food choices. He got back onto the highway and continued to drive.

Several hours later Amanda's iPod ran out of battery power and she rummaged through her bag to find the car charger. She pulled everything out of her bag and then shook the bag out, holding it upside down over her lap. Only the charger for a wall plug-in fell out.

"Shit!" Amanda exclaimed hastily, stomping her foot on the floor mat. She could feel Carlisle stiffen beside her as she swore. "I mean…sorry," she apologized.

"Is something wrong?" Carlisle asked, choosing not to dwell on her poor word choice since she did say she was sorry.

"Yes! I don't have the charger for my iPod!" Amanda said shrilly. She growled and threw herself back into her seat and said, "I am going to DIE!"

"That's a bit dramatic, don't you think, Amanda?" Carlisle asked with a chuckle. Amanda huffed and didn't answer him as she threw all of her personal belongings back into her bag roughly. She then tossed it on the floor of the car and leaned back into the leather seat and stewed in her own annoyance. Carlisle smiled and offered a positive solution, "Oh, it is not such a bad thing. Now we can visit. Won't that be a nice for a change of pace?"

"You're kidding, right?" Amanda turned to her uncle after a long pause and asked him in a harsh tone. She was not thrilled to be without her music for the duration of the long drive. "Cause' I'm never quite sure with you. It is hard to tell when you are trying to be funny or whether you are just being all old and lame!"

"Watch your mouth," Carlisle warned softly in a low voice. He was not angry, but he didn't like her tone and he would not tolerate rudeness.

"Whatever!" Amanda grumbled under her breath and she clutched her middle. She had eaten the chips, candy and orange juice way too fast and she was feeling a bit car sick and claustrophobic. Carlisle looked over to her and he sighed lightly, feeling sorry for her discomfort. Driving non-stop in a car was easy for him. He never needed a rest, he never felt sore from sitting in one position too long, and he didn't mind the silence of the long drive.

"Would you like me to put some air on? Perhaps you will feel better with a slight breeze. It is getting a bit stuffy in here," Carlisle offered. Amanda didn't answer so he turned the air on a mild setting. "Why don't you grab one of the bottles of water from the cooler and sip on it, Amanda?" he kindly suggested.

After a few minutes, Amanda gave into her uncle's suggestion and she got a bottle of water. She didn't want to admit it, but he was right. The cool air from the fans and the water helped make her feel a bit less queasy. She drank half the bottle and then screwed the lid back on and placed it in the cup holder.

"Are you feeling any better?" Carlisle asked kindly. Amanda nodded. "Good. I am glad. I realize that you must have some anxieties to go along with this move. I understand where those feelings are coming from, Amanda, but we all need to try to work together to make this merger a success. Positive thinking. It will make all the difference."

Amanda cringed to herself a bit at his words of wisdom. She also hated repetition and he had already used the 'all the difference' line early that morning. Ever since she first met him more than three years ago, Amanda was annoyed with Dr Cullen's need to fix everyone's problems. She knew that he was trying to help and she even believed he was earnest in his efforts. He truly was a good guy, but it still bothered Amanda when he would act as a father figure.

"Liz has been nervous as well," Carlisle stated. Amanda nodded. Elizabeth had mentioned to her over the phone that she feared the possibility of hurting Amanda. "She is doing very well. Remarkably so, and I have little doubt she won't take to our new living arrangement with flying colors. She has great control, Amanda. Better than any of my children had in their third year. I dare say she is more disciplined than Esme was after a decade of resisting the smell of human blood."

"Really?" Amanda asked. She found herself curious. It was not often the topic of bloodthirsty vampires was brought up in her presence. It was such a strange conversation to be having, but she felt better to talk about it so the words 'blood' and 'human' were familiarized to the point of not scaring her when they were used.

"Yes. She has found the will to succeed because she can't live without you any longer. She misses you terribly, you know?"

"She says so every time I talk to her," Amanda informed him, not sounding too convinced.

"It is amazing what such powerful love can do. It has motivated her to take on our lifestyle and excel at it. She spent an hour at the supermarket last week during rush hour and she mingled with other customers and made it in and out without a single temptation. I know she is ready for this. You have to trust me that I would not be bringing you home yet if I didn't think Liz could handle it."

"That's great," Amanda replied dully. She didn't like to think about Elizabeth being different from the woman she remembered. She had really grown to love her adopted mother before the night of the terrible accident where Elizabeth lost her life. Now, Amanda was not so sure how she felt. She was still a bit angry about that night. She thought she was to blame for all the pain Elizabeth had to go through to become a vampire and then to train to resist killing humans. Amanda knew it was only because of her that Carlisle changed Elizabeth. She had begged him to. It had changed everyone's lives that day when Carlisle gave Amanda her wish. Amanda wasn't so sure she would have begged for him to save Elizabeth if she would have know the truth of what she would become.

"Do you know what I learned the other day, Amanda?" Carlisle asked suddenly, breaking Amanda from her thoughts of guilt. He waited for her to respond she finally gave in.

"No. What did you learn?" Amanda asked with fake enthusiasm.

"Esme's name…it means 'love'," he said thoughtfully. "When she named your mother she named her Amy because the name, Amy, also means 'love',"

"Okay…" Amanda said sarcastically, "Your point being?"

"My point, Amanda…is that your mother was loved very much. Esme chose the name as a reminder so Amy would always know how much she was loved by her mother."

"Ya, right!" Amanda said.

"Do you know what your name means, Amanda?" Carlisle asked kindly, ignoring her disdainful replies.

"No," Amanda answered.

"It means," Carlisle began. He paused for emphasis and then when he was sure he had Amanda's undivided attention he told her. "Amanda means, 'Worthy of love'!"

"Ya, right!" Amanda blurted out, thinking about how her mother never showed her any affection that resembled love before she took her own life.

"That is right! Your mother, as wrong as she was to leave you, loved you Amanda. She was never sure how to show you. She grew up without a mother as well. Remember that. She never meant to hurt you. In spite of the turn her life took when she had you, she knew you were special. She knew that you deserved to be loved, Dear."

Amanda stiffened and looked out the window. She didn't want to cry in front of Carlisle and he was upsetting her with his honest words that she always had trouble hearing. She couldn't believe those words. Not after all that she had been through. She was far too stubborn to accept love from anyone now.

"Let us love you, Amanda. Let Elizabeth love you. That is all we ask of you," he finished. "You are worthy, Sweetheart. Even if you do not believe it yourself."

"Okay. Okay. Are you done?" Amanda asked shortly. She was angry now. Carlisle was a bit shocked by her reaction, but he smiled the best he could and bowed his head to her. She sighed and leaned forward to turn on the radio and spent a few minutes finding a station that worked. When she found one she leaned back and put her feet on the front console and hugged her knees. Her right hand overlapped her left wrist; her index finger rubbed the stone on her mother's bracelet absentmindedly as she stared out the window. She cared for Liz at one time, but it was hard for Amanda to understand her feelings when it came to those people closest to her in her life.

Carlisle let the topic rest.

*

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*

The day dragged on for Amanda. She read her magazines cover to cover a few times each and she stared a hole through the car window as well, anything to avoid talking to her uncle again. She was still upset about the lovey-dovey conversation they had earlier. Carlisle sensed Amanda was upset so he let her be and only made brief chit chat with her when they made pit stops along the way. Eventually, day turned to night and just before midnight, Amanda fell asleep again curled up with her pillow and the throw she had brought along.

When she woke, it was still dark, but she was surprised that the car was no longer moving and she was alone. She heard voices and she opened her eyes and peered around. Over the car door, she could see some ghostly, white figures gathered and behind them in the shadows was a house. Amanda felt a bit nauseous all of a sudden_. 'I can't believe this is actually happening,' _she thought. It had been a lot of discussion and preparation for this day to come full term, and now she would have to face it. She almost closed her eyes again to pretend she was still asleep, but her car door swung open and Alice reached in and hugged her.

"Oh, how I missed you!" Alice sang. "I know it was only a few weeks, but still. I missed you!"

"Uh…" Amanda mumbled, still half asleep, "I…missed you…too?"

"You're silly!" Alice chirped and she undid Amanda's belt buckle. "Come on! Come on! There is so much to show you and someone who had been dying to see you again!"

"Don't you mean, died, Alice? As in past tense since she did that three years ago?" Emmet's voice boomed and then he laughed. Amanda heard a cracking sound, like two rocks smacking together and Emmet said, "Ow!"

"How was the drive, Amanda?" Rosalie asked, rubbing her hand as Alice pulled Amanda out of the car. She held her arms out for Amanda and hugged her ritually, though Rosalie was not a overly affectionate being most times. Alice couldn't resist and she hugged them both, but her thin, dainty arms didn't make it far around the two other girls.

"Oh, it was super!" Amanda sarcastically grumbled. Rosalie let go of her and nodded. Alice seemed to know as well of the issues Amanda had on the road with their father.

"He meant well," Alice said lovingly. "And it is true... We all love you very much!"

"Oh, geez, Alice! Let's not go all sappy on her too. I am sure you are tired, Amanda. Do you want to see your room first?" Rosalie interjected.

"But Liz-" Alice started.

"I am sure Liz would understand if Amanda wanted some rest first. This is not something we should rush her into if she is not ready. You heard what Mom and Dad said."

Amanda didn't know what she wanted. She was tired, hungry, and grumpy. The whole day was long and filled with overwhelming feelings of anxiety and resentment. She was not in the mood to put up with her cousin's bickering. Emmet came in and scooped her up in the nick of time. Amanda stared at him with squinted eyes and then smacked the top of his head.

"Hey, what was that for?" he asked, not hurt since it was just a tap to him. He was just curious what he had done this time.

"That is for leaving me behind with Mr. Three hundred and sixty-eight!" Amanda snapped and then sarcastically added, "It was sure fun!"

"Sorry, Runt," Emmet apologized and put Amanda down again and he ruffled her hair, as if it was not tangled enough from sleeping on it all day. Her bun was hanging on her shoulder and hair was sticking out of it and around her face. Amanda tugged on the elastic to let her hair loose. It was all wavy from drying in a knot all day. She shook her head a bit as Emmet explained himself, "They wouldn't let me. I guess they think we make a troublesome team."

"You act like you are ten years old, Em. That's why!" Alice informed him. Emmet went to grab Alice in sport, but she saw his move and she jumped out of the way before he could reach her. He hugged air. Alice giggled and stuck her pointy tongue out at him.

"Enough, kids," Esme spoke loudly. Then in a much more pleasant voice she asked, "Are you ready?"

Amanda squinted through the darkness. There were lights inside the house that gave off a bit of glow to the front yard and driveway. Amanda could see her aunt and uncle standing together in the doorway now. They were still and cautious, but she thought they were smiling. Jasper was there as well. He looked intense, guarding something.

Or someone….

"Hello, Amanda," A familiar, but much more beautiful voice than Amanda had heard over the phone, chimed. A tall, slender woman stepped out from inside the house and walked a few feet out ahead of Carlisle and Esme and then stopped. Jasper huddled by her side without being too obnoxious about his involvement. Amanda gasped so softly, that no human would have registered the sound.

Elizabeth smiled and she bit her lip. Her hair was brighter than it had ever been. It glowed with several different red tones and instead of it being completely pin strait with a flip, it waved a bit and then flipped, making her look like she was some sort of fire Goddess. Her skin, that was once fair, was not every bit as white as the Cullen's or the Denali's. Her eyes were a rich gold. There was no doubt about it. Elizabeth was gorgeous, powerful, and majestic.

Elizabeth was a vampire.

Amanda stepped into closer, carefully, but not thinking of her safety. She was merely overwhelmed to see her new mother for the first time. As she got closer the light from inside the house shown on her and Elizabeth's mouth opened and her lips party slightly. Her eyes smiled, but they looked sad, like she had found something that had been lost a long time ago.

"Oh, Amanda," She cried gracefully, stepping closer and embracing the girl. "You are beautiful!"

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**Please Review! :)**


	25. Rude Awakenings

_Note* _

_Reminder:__ If you are interested in checking out some of the 'Worthy of Love' drawings, the links to them are on my profile! Some new ones are posted for Part Two now. :)_

_Enough with the AN...here is the next chapter!_

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**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Twenty-Five**

|Rude Awakenings|

Port Alberni, British Columbia...

Amanda was finally able to wave Alice away, insisting she was fine just very tired, and closed the door of her brand new bedroom in their new house. She was in a new town, as well, with her new mother downstairs keeping a safe distance. That was not normal!

She had spent the last hour awkwardly making small chat with Elizabeth. Amanda had no idea how to communicate with her in person after three years of being apart. Alice said, that things would warm up in time. To Amanda, the whole experience of moving to Vancouver Island was overwhelming and scary. Amanda was confused about her feelings on the matter. She needed some time by herself to think without the scrutinizing eyes of her family watching her every move. That is how it had felt when she had got the tour of the Cullen's new lakeside home when she first arrived. The Cullens were eager to please Amanda, knowing that she was going to find adjusting to the change more difficult than they would.

The new mansion on Sproat Lake was just a grand as the lake house in Kipta; only it was even bigger with more rooms to try to remember. Amanda recited _'third floor, third door on the right' _in her mind a few times so she would remember that it was her bedroom as she undressed from the outfit she had worn for the twenty four hour road trip from Hell she had just been on with her 'uncle', Dr Carlisle Cullen. Amanda sighed heavily as she recalled the heartfelt talk he had sprung on her not that long ago.

"_Do you know what I learned the other day, Amanda?" _Carlisle had asked Amanda suddenly during a quiet moment in the car together on their way from Denali, Alaska to Vancouver Island. _"Esme's name…it means 'love'. When she named your mother she named her Amy because the name, Amy, also means 'love'. Your mother was loved very much. Esme chose the name as a reminder so Amy would always know how much she was loved by her mother,"_

Amanda had not taken kindly to Carlisle's loving words. However, he continued to tell her that,_ "Amanda means, 'Worthy of love'. Your mother, as wrong as she was to leave you, loved you Amanda. She was never sure how to show you. She grew up without a mother as well. Remember that. She never meant to hurt you. In spite of the turn her life took when she had you, she knew you were special. She knew that you deserved to be loved, Dear,"_

When Carlisle spoke to Amanda as a parental figure she got very defensive and pushed him away, though she desperately needed a strong male role model in her life. He thought of her as one of his own children now and took on a father-like role, hoping she would accept his love one day. He and Esme loved Amanda sincerely and told her many times, but Amanda never let on how she felt about them. Amanda liked the Cullens; it was not that they were not good to her, but they were the reason Elizabeth was now a monster. Living with a family of vampires was not an easy life to live. Amanda resented all the lies, secrets, and precautions…even if they were meant for her best interest. The constant reminder of how dangerous they all were made Amanda act hostile towards them.

"_Let us love you, Amanda. Let Elizabeth love you. That is all we ask of you. You are worthy, Sweetheart. Even if you do not believe it yourself," _Carlisle had begged Amanda to see reason. He wanted so much for her to learn to love and how to be loved in return. The words echoed in Amanda's head as she pulled open each drawer to find where her pajamas were. Her 'aunt' Esme had already unpacked for her. She forced back tears of emotional pain as she searched for her clothing.

She knew that Elizabeth was trying very hard to make this family come together and the Cullen's wanted her to try as well. Amanda was not quite sure how to let anyone into her heart again. It had taken a lot out of her to trust Elizabeth enough to admit she loved her. When Elizabeth died, Amanda hit rock bottom and she never wanted to feel hurt like that again. She had let Elizabeth into her heart and then she almost lost her. '_Never again!'_ Amanda vowed stubbornly.

'_No! I did lose her. She died!'_ Amanda thought strongly as she pulled on a pair of pajama bottoms and slammed the middle drawer of her new dresser shut. Instead of oak wood, like in Denali, now her bedroom furniture was all rich, dark cherry wood. Her bed was a four-poster queen with a large headboard that had a scalloped edged and fine detailed carvings ingrained into it. Amanda hastily shoved herself into a long sleeved, cotton t-shirt to go with her bottoms and scoped out her surroundings before she moved from the place in front of her dresser. She was not sure why, since the room was amazing for a twelve-year-old's bedroom, but she resented it for being so grand and immaculate. She felt out of place in it, as she often felt living with the Cullens.

She had felt the same about her room in Denali too. Living with the Denali sisters, who had a reputation for promiscuity, had not made her very well liked at school during her time spent in Alaska. Kids proved to be just as mean in the USA as they were in Canada. Worse, perhaps, due to all the television programs that made young girls think it was cool to be mean girls.

Amanda resented being different. She didn't like to stand out: and her family, the elaborate room, new house, with the large garage, with all the expensive cars made her feel like she was living in an alternate universe. She was hitting the age where appearances mattered a lot more and standing out was embarrassing. She just wanted to belong.

Amanda grabbed her pillow and threw it onto the large bed. She pulled back the rich, burgundy colored quilt and crawled up and into the sheets, knocking all the unnecessary throw cushions onto the floor before plopping down into her favorite pillow. She held her breath to keep her emotions buried deep. Then, when the burn inside her chest subsided, she released a long exhale and closed her eyes. She had been sleeping on and off all day it seemed, but Amanda was exhausted emotionally. Therefore, she fell asleep quickly.

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*

When she opened her eyes the blankets were twisted around her body and she was lying face down, horizontal on the massive bed. Amanda lifted her head and looked around. It was winter, but there was no snow in Port Alberni. This surprised Amanda. In Kipta or Alaska at this time of year, there would have been snow covering the ground. Amanda could see the lake from her large, full-length windows that she had left open last night. It was not frozen over, but it looked black and cold through the darkness of the morning fog.

Amanda lifted herself up from her bed and grimaced. Her shoulders and neck were stiff from the long day of sleeping upright in a vehicle and from her, obvious, rough night of sleep in her new bed. She sat up, huffed loudly, the hair in her face fluttered in front of her and then she slapped it away and tucked it behind her ears. She knew that everyone would know she was awake by this time. She resented that she had very little privacy. Especially with her cousin Alice living in the same house.

"Knock knock?" Alice sang, opening the door and running inside to join Amanda on the high bed. Alice jumped and landed neatly next to Amanda, who hardly moved. She was used to Alice's perkiness. Although, it did bother Amanda sometimes, she liked Alice. She easily let her feelings of resentment slide for the pixie vampire who was smaller than she was now-a-days. Besides, Alice's talent was useful.

Alice shimmied behind Amanda and placed her tiny hands on the back of Amanda's shoulders and began to massage her tense muscles. It hurt, but felt really good at the same time. Amanda stretched her arms while Alice kneaded her back carefully. "Thanks, Aly," she said appreciatively after a few minutes. Alice stopped and spun around to face Amanda with a big smile on her face. "Hey, can you--?" Amanda started to ask, but Alice got up and before she could finish speaking Alice handed Amanda an outfit to wear. Amanda gave a small smile, the best she could muster after just waking up.

"You would have chosen it yourself, but it would have taken you longer to find all the pieces. By the way, Mandi…your fashion sense is improving daily and I am so proud of you!" Alice chirped and she bounced around as Amanda crawled off the bed and hoped away to the bathroom that connected with her bedroom.

"I know!" Amanda stated smartly as she closed the bathroom door. She had a quick shower and then got dressed before opening the bathroom door again. Alice came in right away and started doing Amanda's hair. Amanda didn't complain. She knew Alice liked to play with her long hair since she had fairly short hair that was unruly and stuck out in all directions. Rosalie didn't let her little sister play with her hair. She preferred to do her own. Amanda normally wanted to do her own thing, but when she was lazy it worked in her favor that Alice was so willing to jump in and help groom her tangled mane of hair.

"Hurry up, Alice. Just dry it…nothing fancy," Amanda insisted, as she brushed her teeth. Then she put on some eyeliner that Alice lent her and then applied her own, frosted pink lip-gloss that smelled like cotton candy. Esme and Carlisle did not like her to wear too much makeup, but they allowed her to put on a little bit on the weekends. Amanda resented that they had such silly rules for her and she had been taking makeup to school in her backpack the last four months in Alaska to put on in the girl's bathroom. After school she would wash it off before going home. Alice knew her deception, but never told. They were best friends, after all, and it was not something that endangered Amanda, so she kept her lips sealed.

"I am hurrying," Alice said impatiently as she finished blow-drying the last piece of Amanda's thick, long hair. It was true. Alice was pretty speedy at blow-drying. It took her half the time it would have taken Amanda do it on her own. Alice finished and turned off the hot styling tool and blew out a puff of air from her lips and wiped her brow dramatically. To which, Amanda rolled her eyes.

"Drama queen! You aren't even tired!" Amanda laughed and she got up to take a closer look at herself in the mirror. She looked older for her age. She was not super tall, but she was average height or more and with makeup and the stylish outfit she had on she could have passed for a freshman in high school perhaps.

"It was still hard work. You have a lot of hair!" Alice argued, pretending to be insulted. Amanda faced her and gave her a sarcastic expression. "Well, fine. It was not hard work, but it took some effort," she corrected. There was a long pause where neither girl knew what to say. Amanda suddenly realized she was ready for the day and took a really big breath in and held it.

"Breathe," Alice said with a cheery smile and she took Amanda's hand, "It's going to be good. You'll see!"

"Ya, right," Amanda mumbled as she released her breath and followed her cousin out of the bathroom. Alice tugged on her arm to drag her downstairs to join the family. Amanda followed along, but felt like a stranger again in this new home. She would have to face all the Cullens and Elizabeth at the same time. They had not all been in the same place together since Christmas Eve three years earlier.

Amanda hoped that this family gathering would have a better ending than the last.

*

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*

"Did you sleep well, my darling?" Esme cooed as she placed a bowl of oatmeal in front of her niece. Amanda nodded and picked up a spoon and began poking at the steaming, hot mush.

Although Amanda was Esme's biological granddaughter, Esme and the family had all adopted her as Esme and Carlisle's niece and rarely brought up the term 'grandmother' anymore. It hardly seemed fitting in their lie. The people in their new town would have to believe Amanda really was the daughter of Elizabeth and the late Cole Roth, niece to the Cullens. It was believable only because Cole was not alive and the story was that he was Esme's brother, which accounted for Amanda's likeness to her aunt Esme.

"How do you like your room? Do you have everything you need?" Esme asked pleasantly, taking a seat at the large, dining room table next to Amanda.

"Ya. It's perfect," Amanda said resentfully. She had nothing else to say. It was perfect and if she complained she would have sounded like a brat. Esme took a closer look at Amanda's face and sighed. She thought Amanda was wearing a bit too much eyeliner, but she decided not to tackle that situation at the moment. She had to learn to take a step back when it came to mothering Amanda now that Elizabeth was back in the picture. The role of the two ladies was similar in that they both thought of Amanda as their little girl. Elizabeth kept her distance for obvious reasons, but Esme wanted to give Elizabeth the space to enter Amanda's life as a parental figure again.

Amanda ignored Esme's judgmental glance at her makeup choices and pushed the hair behind her left ear with her left index finger. She continued to stir the oatmeal with a spoon in her right hand until there was a large, cooled off clump on the end. "Where is everybody?" Amanda asked, noticing that it was only she and Esme in the room at the moment. Alice had disappeared without a word after she led Amanda downstairs for breakfast that morning. She had left Amanda with Esme to be fed.

"Oh, they all went out hunting together," Esme explained, smiling when Amanda looked up curiously as she chewed a mouthful of oatmeal and swallowed it.

"All of them?" Amanda asked and then she took a large bite from the wad of gummed up oats on the end of her spoon. She wasn't particularly fond of oatmeal, but she had learned that it was best not to ask for sugary food for breakfast, or any other meal for that matter, because Esme was constantly health conscious for Amanda's sake. Not to mention, Carlisle was big on nutritious eating. Amanda sometimes bought candy with her allowance and bribed her vampire cousins to help her hide it from their parent's know-how. Her favorite was anything covered in sour sugar or anything covered in chocolate.

"Yes, Dear. They are being extra careful to scope out secluded park land so they can familiarize themselves with the area for future hunting trips," Esme said. She had arrived in Kipta twelve hours sooner than Carlisle and Amanda had so she had been hunting not long after she finished unpacking.

"They are babysitting Liz so she won't kill anyone, right?" Amanda fished for the real reason that every Cullen, except her aunt, was gone hunting. She had known them to usually go two or three at a time, but never six at one time. Esme smiled to cover the truth that was blatantly displayed on her beautiful face. That was exactly the reason why all the Cullen's were out hunting at one time. It was because Elizabeth was new to this land and they needed all the family, especially Alice and Jasper for their special abilities, there in case an emergency arose.

Amanda knew that vampires were dangerous. She had been told a thousand times and had strict rules about what she needed to do if she cut or scraped herself at home. She knew a vampire's bloodlust was something to be wary of. She remembered the time when she had cut her head in Carlisle's study and Emmet went mad to get at her. If it had not been for Jasper's gift to calm his brother down and for the other Cullen's help to hold him off in the time being, Amanda could have been killed.

"Oh, Sweetie, I wouldn't say it exactly like that. Elizabeth is doing very well. They all went along as a precaution, that is all," Esme told Amanda peacefully.

"Isn't that overkill, though?" Amanda added curiously. Six vampires hunting seemed like a lot. Normally, only a few Cullen's had been left to babysit Elizabeth, while the others were in Denali to stay with Amanda.

"Aw, we didn't kill that many! A couple of deer each, is all!" Emmet's voice boomed loudly as he came stomping into the dining room with great speed. Amanda laughed and coughed on her oatmeal. "So, I would say, no…it was not an overkill," he continued answering Amanda's question sincerely.

"You're stupid," Amanda mumbled with her mouthful, trying not to laugh because Emmet seemed to be serious in his statement. He must have not understood the expression. He ignored the insult, he was used to being laughed at for his ignorance, and sniffed Amanda's bowl of mush with a cringed face.

"Not nearly as dumb as you. What…are you eating? It looks like vomit!" Emmet retorted, poking at Amanda's food with disdain. Amanda laughed loudly, covering her mouth so she would not spit oatmeal on the table or her aunt. "Did you like it so much you ate it and regurgitated it so you could eat it again?" Emmet asked, making a stink face at Amanda's bowlful of food.

Esme's pretty smile fell and she tilted her head to the side and watched her children's rude behavior take place. She tisked them and shook her head as she got up and walked away from the table to go clean up the kitchen. Her aunt's reaction made Amanda giggle even more and when she was sure Esme was gone, Amanda flicked her spoon at Emmet and a huge chunk of sticky oatmeal landed in his hair.

"Oh no you di'in'!" Emmet sang, waving his finger back and forth dramatically. Amanda grinned and then suddenly got up to bolt, but Emmet was too fast and as always he caught her in a second and tossed her up over his shoulder. Amanda screamed playfully and began whacking Emmet's butt with her spoon that she had managed to hold onto. "Say you're sorry!" Emmet demanded as he pinched Amanda's side to tickle her, he was careful to be gentle. Amanda shrieked with laughter.

"Never!"

"Aw, come on…You can't run! You can't hide! I am the BIG, BAD, Emmet MONSTER!" Emmet boomed, "Just say you're sorry, Runt, and I will set you free!"

"Ow, ow…Emmet…too hard, too hard," Amanda warned as Emmet roughing tossed her over his other shoulder to tickler her other side. She was still laughing, but there was a strain in her voice that meant she was in discomfort, but she was still having fun. Esme had enough of their horseplay by this point and she returned to the dining room with her hands on her hips and a stern expression on her face. She didn't mind her children having fun, but when Emmet got too rough she worried about Amanda.

"Put her down….Now!" Esme instructed her son. Emmet came to a stop and then thought for a moment. Amanda was able to lift her head up now that he had stopped tickling her and she noticed that they had an audience. The whole family, besides Alice and Jasper were now in the room observing. Emmet sighed and quickly slid Amanda off his back and set her down, feet first on the floor. Amanda lost her balance and stumbled to the floor, still laughing.

"Really, you two…this has to stop. You could get hurt, Amanda," Esme said, shaking her head and reaching for Amanda to help her up. Amanda smiled passed her aunt at her cousin, Emmet. He grinned back.

"Aw, she likes it!" Emmet argued.

"I know you think it is all fun all games, you two, but Esme is right," Carlisle spoke up, stepping over to his wife and lovingly putting his arm around her. Amanda rolled her eyes at her uncle's comment since he was standing behind her and he could not see. Emmet tried to suppress a laugh, but all he got was an exasperated sigh from his mother. Carlisle continued his gentle lecture as Amanda straightened herself out and flipped her hair back out of her face. "The tiniest cut or scrape could be enough to upset Liz and we want to make her as comfortable as we can as she makes her transition to join the family,"

"I think I will be able to handle myself if it is just a little scratch, Carlisle," Elizabeth said gently, stepping a few steps closer. She wanted a better look of Amanda, since last night Amanda had gone to bed after she arrived. They hadn't gotten to spend very much time together yet.

"Yes, you are very disciplined, Liz. It is remarkable, however--"

"However, we do not want to take chances with Amanda's life. I agree with you completely," Elizabeth interrupted, not meaning to be rude. Amanda let a deep breath out loudly, annoyed that, yet again, she was in the middle of family issue involving the possibility of her being eaten.

"Wow! What a fun conversation!" Amanda replied sarcastically, "As much as I enjoy hearing about what a tempting snack I am…can we change the topic?" Amanda let her smile fall as she became serious about dropping the discussion.

"Oh, don't be dramatic, Mandi. It is not like that," Alice chirped as she and Jasper entered the room.

"Isn't it?" Emmet asked, laughing as he sided with Amanda. Alice made a face at him. He had lost control and nearly killed Amanda when she was younger. However, Emmet was becoming resistant to the smell of Amanda's blood now that he had spent so much time with her. He was fairly sure he would not hurt her even if she waved a cut or scrape under his nose.

"It is best to be careful, Dear. That is all we ask of you," Esme said. Carlisle nodded in agreement. Elizabeth was hardly listening. She was staring, all gooey-eyed at Amanda.

"Well, I don't try to hurt myself," Amanda corrected hotly. She was insulted at the insinuation that she was not competent in looking after her well being.

"Alright, that is enough, Amanda. Let's talk about something else," Elizabeth said patiently.

"Like what?" Amanda asked, bored now and growing irritated.

"Anything," Elizabeth said enthusiastically. She smiled and stroked her long, white fingers through Amanda's honey colored hair. Amanda stepped away, pointing at Elizabeth's light pink, silk blouse. Elizabeth's eyes narrowed sadly and she looked down at herself, feeling self-conscious.

"You've got deer juice on your shirt," Amanda announced in monotone, still pointing at the flecks of red on her adoptive mother's blouse. Emmet coughed a chuckled into his hand and Esme and Carlisle sighed.

"Oh," Elizabeth hummed, embarrassed. Alice smiled and took Elizabeth's hand.

"It is nothing to be embarrassed about. It happens," she told the red haired vampire sweetly. Rosalie gave Amanda a shamed look. Amanda shrugged and mouthed the word, 'what?' in response. Then she smirked, knowing very well that she was being a jerk, but she didn't care.

"Ya, not even that noticeable, Lizzy!" Emmet shared, "I get messy sometimes too!"

"Really?" Elizabeth asked softly. She was pretty well kept now when she went hunting, but sometimes she wasn't as tidy as she would have liked. Most of the Cullens had hunting down to perfection and rarely came home spotted with blood.

"It takes years of practice and sometimes stains will occur," Esme explained.

Alice nodded eagerly. "And then we get to go shopping!" she sang.

Everyone laughed except Amanda, who was still not warming up to her vampire mother. The whole situation was too odd to pretend like it was normal. Human children did not have to worry about being eaten by their mothers, aunts, uncles, or cousins.

"It's still gross," Amanda said rudely and she walked away to clean up her bowl and spoon. Elizabeth looked a bit hurt, but didn't say anything. No one said anything, but they all watched Elizabeth sympathetically, as to say 'just give her time'.

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_Note* This was a bit of a refresher chapter to remind you of what is going on and the angst Amanda feels. There is more drama to come and the chapters after this one and chapter 26 do seem to get longer. I have a rambling issue still! :P_

_Coming Up Next__....It is customary when the Cullens move to a new town to hold a family meeting. It is Amanda's first time being included in this tradition and it will get heated!_

**Please Remember to Review. Thank you!**


	26. We Are Family

_*Note-_

_Here is the next chapter. Amanda is, yes, a bit bothered...think about how you would feel if you were a pre-teen girl living with a family of vampires. I remember being that age. It was not so long ago! ...Yikes!_

_I tried my best at making a __banner__ for the story out of some drawings. Check it out if you'd like. I posted it on my profile. :)_

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**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Twenty-Six**

|We Are Family|

The Cullens were having a relaxing Sunday afternoon. The kids spent the morning setting up the latest video game console in the living room and proceeded to play with it for hours after that. Emmet and Jasper were hogging the game from Amanda, who was anxiously waiting for her turn. In Emmet's opinion, the human girl had too slow of reflexes to play with them. Esme had to step in to tell her sons to play fairly, in spite of their age.

Carlisle and Rosalie had gone to sign some lease papers for his new office building, next to the hospital, in town. This year, Rosalie would be working for him after school until she graduated, and then she was going to try her best to merge into nursing to see if she could handle the challenge of working in the medical field. If she managed herself well, she thought she might try to make her way through medical school if she could convince others she was older than sixteen. Carlisle was fully supportive of Rosalie's dream, and proud as ever to have one of his children follow in his footsteps.

With the kids busy and Carlisle out of the house, Esme and Elizabeth spent some time together enjoying their hobbies in the living room. The two women really got on well and Esme was thrilled to have her friend, and sister, living with their family. Elizabeth was pleased to be a part of the Cullen family too, but for her it was more gratitude than anything else. She would have nowhere else to go if they had not accepted her into their lives. She was constantly being reminded that it was her family now and she didn't have to feel like a guest in their house. She tried to make herself at home, but it was easier said than done. Elizabeth was still a bit fragile when concerned about her transition and needed a lot of support and reassurance from Carlisle and Esme.

"She is upset," Elizabeth said suddenly, breaking from the silence. Obviously, Amanda's rude comments that morning were weighing heavily on her mind.

Esme was painting on canvas and Elizabeth was embroidering on a lace cloth she had croqueted. Esme brought her eyes up from her artwork and smiled lovingly to her new sister. "She will come around. She needs some time to adjust. She was doing very well in Alaska this last year. She made a few friends on her swim team and her grades were improving," Esme said encouragingly. "She will need some time to adjust to this move. A lot of things have changed in her life again. You know how hard that is for her…and she doesn't like to share her feelings so sometimes they come out in misplaced anger."

Elizabeth nodded thoughtfully and reached up to her face to push her none-existent glasses up onto her head. She realized her mistake and sighed, taking her hand away. "Old habits do die hard," she said apologetically. She no longer needed her glasses, she had perfect sight, but she still, on occasion, reached for them. Elizabeth found it embarrassing to make such slip up in front of the Cullens. She didn't find it as daunting to be around Esme, because Esme was so understanding and helpful when it came to adapting to her new life. It was not too long ago that Esme had been the newest member of the family.

"Yes," Esme agreed. "Amanda is no different. Time will correct all these little kinks and smooth them over. I am sure of it!"

"I understood it would be hard to get close to her again because of my…condition," Elizabeth said shyly, referring to Amanda's resistance to her new form. Elizabeth was not used to saying the word, vampire, out loud yet. Esme smiled gently as Elizabeth continued, "I suppose I forgot to consider how hard it would be for her to accept me as her mother as well as a vam-" She cut her own self off. Elizabeth was grateful she could no longer blush, cause she would have been rosy cheeked at that moment.

"Amanda is strong. She may not like what we are, but she does consider us family and she has been very good about keeping the secret. It cannot be easy for her," Esme said, sure of her words. "She is a preteen girl, so she acts out on occasion, but she has adjusted to our lifestyle for the most part. She teases Emmet about blood all the time, so don't think her words this morning were directed at you per se. Amanda is going to be testing you since you are new."

"I know. I should not have thought I could come into her life after three years and expect her to listen to me like she did when she was eight, but I guess, I thought…I thought she would be…" Elizabeth struggled to find the words, since they hurt her to say. "I thought she would be happy to see me."

"She is! She missed you terribly, Liz," Esme consoled her friend. She patted Elizabeth's arm and smiled reassuringly. Elizabeth tried to smile back. She took an unnecessary breath and then sighed. The one good thing about being a new vampire, trying to adjust to the Cullen's way of life, was that Elizabeth's human instincts were fresher in her mind. She didn't have to relearn how to act human.

"Thanks, Esme."

There was a knock on the door frame to the room and Carlisle waited to be seen before he entered. When both women graced him with a friendly smile he entered. "Sorry to interrupt ladies," he apologized. "I didn't mean to intrude on your conversation."

"We were finished," Elizabeth conceded. Esme bowed her head slowly in agreement and then waited for him to speak. She knew what he was about to announce, as it was tradition when they moved to a new city.

"Is everyone home at this time, then?" he asked.

"Yes, the kids are in the other room playing a game," Elizabeth offered. Carlisle smiled at her appreciatively.

"How did it go with Rosalie?" Esme asked. She knew that Rosalie was eager to try out the medical field, but, like any teenager, she had an interest in only certain aspects of the job, paperwork not being one of them.

"Well, she was bored for the first little while, I suspect, but when I got her working on the filing system she seemed keen!" Carlisle said with a grin and a hopeful tone. He enjoyed sharing his love of his occupation with Rosalie. Especially if that was what she wanted to dedicate her life to, as well. He was not surprised she was interested, she was very smart and enjoyed the science of medicine, but he worried a bit about her PR skills when she would have to communicate with human beings. She was not always the most compassionate and endearing soul, though her intentions were usually good.

"That is great, honey," Esme cooed lovingly as she got up from her seat by her canvas. She went to her husband and planted a kiss on his cheek, cupping his other cheek with her hand. Elizabeth looked down, not wanted to stare. She was still mourning the loss of Cole, but she did not begrudge Esme and Carlisle's love for one another. In fact, seeing them love one another comforted her greatly. She liked to see them happy.

"Would you please help wrangle the kids to the dining room?" Carlisle asked gently. He sighed, knowing how a few of his children felt about this routine. "It is time for a family meeting."

*

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*

"Family meeting?" Amanda inquired as she was pulled to the dining room by the arm. Alice guided her to a chair and then sat on the one next to her. Alice loved family meetings. She knew that this one was coming so she got everyone to the table before the adults arrived.

"This is pointless," Rosalie huffed. She sat down, crossed her legs, and leaned back against her chair and folded her arms against her chest. She was not a fan of the repetition. Every move they had meant another meeting and they always went over the same topics. Since Elizabeth's transformation, there had been a few unplanned meetings where Amanda had not been involved, so it was Amanda's first time being included in this tradition.

"Mmm…" Amanda mumbled dully, picking up on Rosalie's attitude.

Jasper was neutral in his feelings for the family discussions. However, it didn't help him when others were moping. Their vibe was hard to overcome. He, personally, felt the meetings were useful for making sure everyone was in the know about the new set up and fabricated stories they were going to go by this time around.

"Where are the oldies?" Emmet asked impatiently, hating to be torn away from his gaming. Carlisle and Esme entered the room first, followed closely by Elizabeth who took a seat across from Esme. Carlisle took a stand at the head of the table.

"Thank you, everyone, for being here. I am sure you would like to get back to your leisure activities so let's try to make this meeting run as smoothly as possible, shall we?"

"Yes, let's!" Emmet said.

Alice perked up to speak as well. "We shall!" she sang, springing up on her seat so she could rest on her knees to gain height.

Amanda giggled at Rosalie's off put expression. Jasper coughed and nodded for Carlisle to continue. Carlisle paused and looked around to make sure all kids were on task. Amanda looked around as well, to see what the others were up to. Alice was bouncing with excitement, Emmet was bouncing with impatience, Rosalie was not bouncing at all, and Jasper was still as a statue and wide eyed, soaking up all the emotions.

"First off..." Carlisle began. "I would like to commend you all for your contributions in helping Liz adapt to our lifestyle over the last several years. You were all wonderful!"

"And Liz is wonderful, too!" Alice chirped, knowing that was her father's next point.

Carlisle nodded at his tiny cheerleader and then smiled at Elizabeth."Yes, and while we have already welcomed you to the family, Liz, I want to say it again…How happy we all are that you have decided to stay with us and join our home."

"Thank you," Elizabeth said softly, smiling faintly. "Thank you, to all of you for welcoming me so graciously. I feel very fortunate to be a part of your family."

"Our family!" Alice corrected sweetly.

Every member of the Cullen family gave Elizabeth a nod or a smile to confirm Alice's words. Amanda was frozen and didn't know what to say. If she would have freedom to speak her mind she might have said, _'Like she had a choice!'_, but she knew that she would be reprimanded if she sassed back. Amanda felt she was to blame for Elizabeth's death. She didn't want to draw attention to herself that way either, so that was another reason she kept her thoughts to herself.

"Can we hurry this up?" Rosalie asked impatiently. Her mother shot her a reproving glance.

"Ya! Love ya, Lizzy, but we just made it past level eight on the import levels and it is getting good!" Emmet bellowed, thinking of his latest video game.

"Patience, children!" Esme demanded, pressing her hands on the table and leaning forward to give a stern eye to each one of her kids. Amanda kept her mouth shut, but her eyes were huge taking in the scene with a touch of amusement. Emmet could be such a child and Rosalie was so rude. Even ruder than Amanda was at times.

"The main things I wanted to discuss are the basics. Which, I am aware you know, but it is important none-the-less," Carlisle continued from his stand at the head of the table. Amanda watched him, losing interest slightly, but trying to hear him out.

"We know our school schedule already!" Rosalie interrupted. Alice giggled and took Amanda's hand. She was excited to be in the same grade as Amanda this time around. She usually played a bit older to fit in with her vampire siblings, but Alice was thrilled to be able to go to school with her best friend, even if it was middle school. Alice would fit in. Size wise, at least, since she was itty-bitty. She only had to worry about controlling her know-it-all personality and her hyperactivity so she wouldn't be accused of being a child prodigy with Attention Deficit Disorder.

"For those who need to be reminded," Carlisle carried on. "Emmet, Rosalie, and Jasper are enrolled as juniors at Port Alberni High and Alice and Amanda will attend the Port Alberni Middle."

"Your father and I have always expected you to be responsible and set a good example for our family's name," Esme included, standing beside her husband. He graciously let her take the floor. She continued, "This time is a bit different, because Amanda is going to be attending school with you, and I want each one of you to look out for her and help her whenever she is in need of your guidance."

"Um…I'm not starting kindergarten," Amanda sniped sarcastically. "I can take care of myself!"

"We know that, Darling," Esme cooed. "However, your cousins need a reminder to be on their best behavior every decade or so."

"Thanks, Mom," Rosalie grumbled under her breath. She hated being treated like a child. She couldn't stop her mouth from running, though, like the teenager she was stuck as forever.

"We'll be good. We gotcha! Can we go now?" Emmet asked with a big smile, standing up in hopes the meeting was now over. Esme held up her finger and then motioned it downward so he would take a seat again. Emmet's grin faded and he sat down with a face that a scolded puppy would have made. Amanda laughed softly at him.

"Hey, can we talk about raising allowances?" Rosalie asked, leaning forward, hoping this would be the time to bring this up. She and her siblings had been allotted a weekly amount and it was generous, but sometimes not enough to buy all the things they wanted.

"Ah, yes," Carlisle answered. "We have discussed the issue of your allowances and have come up with a way to determine each of your individual weekly payments."

"Oooo, fun!" Alice said, already knowing the plan.

"Each report card, you will be given a certain amount for each A, B, C, and so forth. The higher the grade, the larger amount that grade is worth. If you have grades lower than a C they will subtract against your total. We will add up the amounts and that will be your weekly allowance payment."

"Um…" Amanda said, not quite getting it yet.

Alice understood. Rosalie rolled her eyes. She didn't want to fuss with the plan. She and the rest of her siblings were mainly straight A students most semesters depending on missed tests or gym participation. The Cullen kids would have no problem getting quite a nice sum of money for allowance. Alice explained to Amanda quickly what each letter grade was worth.

Amanda finally caught on and groaned. "That's not fair!" She complained shrilly to her aunt and uncle. Carlisle raised his eyebrows and watched her thoughtfully for a moment.

"It is fair, I can assure you. Of course, negative points for detentions or any time we are called in to deal with a school disturbance will also be in effect."

"No…it is not fair! They are all smarter than me!" Amanda said, waving a pointed finger around at all her cousins. "You are punishing me for being stupid!"

"Amanda, that is not so," Esme said gently. She had a feeling Amanda would not take kindly to this new arrangement. Amanda's grades had never been very good. She didn't enjoy homework and often slacked off in school.

"You are smart, Amanda. If you apply yourself," Carlisle told her with encouragement and a pleasant smile that made Amanda more upset. He continued optimistically, "I am sure if you put a little more attention toward your studies you can get your grades up this semester."

"Oh, come on! It is still not fair. They all have, like, ninety years on me!" Amanda exclaimed, talking about her vampire cousins once again. "Even if I study, I will be at a disadvantage!" she whined.

"I think you are capable of whatever you put your mind to, Dear," Carlisle spoke sincerely. His kind, patient smile made Amanda boil inside and her eyes narrowed at him. She was seething with resentment as he continued to announce how much each of them would get for allowance until the next report card and the amounts would be recalculated.

There were six classes at Amanda's previous school and she had gotten an A ($15) in Gym, C- (-$5) in math, Pass (-$10) in Social Studies, B ($3) in English, C ($0) in Spanish, and B ($3) in Sciences. Amanda's number added together was not impressive.

"Six dollars a week?" Amanda blurted out, slapping her hand down on the table. "How do you expect me to live on that?"

"You will have a chance to earn more, Amanda," Esme reasoned. "You know that you can always ask us if there is anything essential you need and can not afford yourself. We do not deny you those items. This is just your pocket money for leisure."

"So, I get sixty a week, then?" Rosalie asked, butting in. She wanted to make sure she had the concept straight. She had six A's the last semester of school that she had attended. If each of them was worth fifteen dollars than that would be correct.

"Yes, you are correct, Rose," Carlisle told his blonde daughter. She let a smile spread, not minding the meeting so much anymore. She had been getting half that amount on their old regime. Alice would be getting sixty-five dollars a week now, Emmet, fifty-one, Jasper, fifty-five, and Amanda…six dollars.

"This is crap!" Amanda called out, unable to shunt her rage any longer. Alice was a bit surprised and she jumped at Amanda's shrill voice. She knew Amanda was not going to like the new allowance regime, but she didn't see Amanda acting out so much at the family meeting. That was the difficult thing for Alice to predict, Amanda's reactions, because Amanda was quite impulsive and unpredictable. She didn't often think before she reacted and that is how she would often get herself into trouble.

"Watch your language, Amanda!" Elizabeth stood up and demanded, lapsing into her maternal ways once again. "I know you are not pleased with this arrangement, but you will not disrespect your aunt, uncle, or myself. Do you understand me?"

Amanda shook her head mildly in disbelief and pushed back from the table and crashed into the back of her seat with her arms pressed firmly at her sides. Her fingers clawed the seat cushion tightly. She felt like she was being ganged up on; that she was, once again, at a disadvantage. She could not see clearly to understand that rules were set in place to teach her responsibility. She could only see that she was going to be earning less allowance than everyone else and it made her angry.

"Do you understand me?" Elizabeth repeated strongly. She did not see anyone out of the corners of her eyes. She was focused on Amanda. She was finally stepping up again to be the mother to Amanda that she had not been able to be for the past three years.

Amanda gritted her teeth. "Yes," she conceded loathingly, barely at a whisper.

"Good, now straighten up and pay attention," Elizabeth demanded in a lighter tone of voice as she took her seat again. She bowed her head to Carlisle to suggest he continue. He smiled at her, proud of her for asserting herself. Then he faced the table again.

"Just a few more things," Carlisle began. "Of course, I want to stress, like we talked about previously, that any cuts, scraps, bruises will need to be addressed as quickly as possible. If you hurt yourself, Amanda, you are to tell one of us immediately so we can be better prepared."

"So Liz won't eat me. I KNOW!" Amanda said rudely. Elizabeth's mouth opened in gasp and then she winced and shied away, looking off into space to avoid thinking about the possibility. Esme seemed upset with Amanda's outburst too.

"You are getting a bit too rude for my liking, young lady," Carlisle warned, "One more comment like that one and there will be consequences, I am sorry to say."

"How am I being rude?" Amanda insisted. "You are rude!" She was starting to get red in the cheeks from her anger. Carlisle held his composure, but he did not like the way she was speaking to him. Jasper shifted a bit in his chair, looking to Alice to see if he should intervene.

"Don't you dare!" Amanda yelled at Jasper, catching onto what he was trying to do. She focused her anger back at Carlisle and yelled, "I am upset for a reason! I don't want to talk about any of this anymore! I know the rules. You tell me everyday! Don't do this, don't do that! Don't yell, don't swear, and don't BLEED!

"Amanda..." Carlisle tried to calm her, but she was not finished.

"I can't help being HUMAN! You have to get over it and LEAVE ME ALONE!" Amanda screamed and she bolted up from her seat and stormed away from the table. Esme and Elizabeth's chairs simultaneously pushed out as they got up to go after Amanda, but Carlisle raised his hand. He moved away from the table and walked slowly down the hallway to catch up with her. Amanda turned to see him coming and she stopped and spun around, glaring at him with tears in her icy, blue eyes.

"Come back to the table, Amanda," he asked of her calmly. "This is a family meeting and we are not finished."

"Family?" Amanda threw the words back at him for questioning. "You are all crazy if you think this a normal family!"

Amanda's chin quivered. She felt her tears start to fall as she turned her back on her uncle and made her way towards the staircase. She was angry and hurt over a lot more things than that discussed at the Cullen family meeting. Carlisle knew this, so he decided to let her have some time to cool down before he would confront her about her outburst.

Amanda had a bad temper and she was often prone to losing it, but she was right about one thing…her family was not normal.

*

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Amanda was crying on her bed, face down in her over-sized sham cushion. Her tears were showing up darker on the burgundy material. She sniffed and turned her head to breathe. She was calming down now, but she felt like she might cry again at any second. Amanda didn't like to fight with the Cullens. They were her only family now, and she did care for them, but sometimes she hated to be the only one that was human and imperfect.

Tonight, her temper got away from her, but she still felt like she was justified for being so angry. It didn't seem right in her mind that she should be the one with all the rules. She hated talking about Elizabeth's lack of control, her blood being too tempting, that she had to be careful, and that she had to be good and perfect to try to fit in with the rest of them. Amanda knew she could never be perfect. The thought of trying to be so good frightened her because she was sure she would fail.

There was a knock at the door. Amanda ignored it and put her face back into her pillow. She was not ready to confront whoever it was behind the door about her fit at the family meeting a few minutes ago. She knew she would be scolded, be forced to apologize, and then reassured once again that everything was going to be okay. Amanda was fairly certain she would never be okay again. She lived with monsters. As good as the Cullens were, they were still monsters. Amanda hated to think of them that way, but it was always in the back of her mind, jabbing at her. There was a second knock to follow the first.

"Amanda?" Jasper's voice rang out with caution as he pushed the bedroom door open.

Amanda shoved her face deeper into her pillow. _'Of course they sent him!'_ she thought stubbornly, _'to sedate me!'_

"Go away!" Amanda said muffled by her pillow. She didn't budge and hoped he would pick up on her anger and leave. Jasper was pretty good about giving Amanda her space. She enjoyed his talent to manipulate feelings at certain times, but when she was mad she didn't like him to mellow her down without her permission to do so. Jasper understood this about Amanda and he was generally very respectful of her wishes.

"I feel that you are still upset, but I would like to come in please, if I may?" He asked kindly, stepping in and closing the door. Alice had sent him. She said that he would be the best to tend to Amanda at this time. Elizabeth had originally wanted to be the one to confront Amanda, but Alice had seen how that would have turned out... a lot more screaming and no chance of a resolve. So, Alice persuaded her mate into doing the job instead. He would put forth his best efforts to reason with their younger cousin.

"I DON'T want to talk about it!" Amanda said, smushing her face into her pillow so hard she couldn't breathe anymore.

She had done that once before too. Held her breath, that is. When she was nine and first brought to live in Denali. She started school and that first week she had been left with only Esme, while the rest of the family was with Elizabeth in Kipta. All the other girls in her class had pierced ears and she wanted to fit in so she begged Esme to let her get her ears pierced too. Esme told her no and that she would have to wait until she was thirteen.

Well, it ended up turning into a tantrum and Amanda threatened Esme by holding her breath saying she wanted to die if she had to go back to school without pierced ears. She insisted the other kids would hate her for being different. It was irrational, but Amanda took it seriously. Stubborn as Amanda was back then, and still is, she held her breath for so long, when her body instinctively forced her to take a breath, she had passed out. That sent Esme into a panic, calling Carlisle who reassured his wife that Amanda would be fine. It was true; Amanda regained consciousness seconds later as Esme made the call to her husband. Amanda had been grounded for a week with no television for pulling that stunt.

"You do know that you can't asphyxiate yourself, right? It will not work Your brain will tell your lungs to breath automatically," Jasper said as he sat on the edge of her bed and then added, "Breathing is involuntary…well, for you it is, anyway,"

"Not…in…the mood!" Amanda stated harshly, tilted her head to the side so she could breathe again. She glared at Jasper, who raised his hands up to surrender.

"No, no, I know," he said with a nod of understanding. "I can respect that."

"Good, cause' I don't want to talk about it!" Amanda repeated.

"Talk about what?" Jasper asked slyly.

"About me being a huge burden to the family!" Amanda proclaimed raising her voice. Then she realized she had just talked about 'it' and she closed her eyes and sighed. Jasper was really quite good at getting Amanda to open up, even without using his talent. "I hate when you shrink me!" Amanda pouted, rolling onto her back. She felt a bit more at ease and she squinted an accusing eye in Jasper's direction.

"It is all you," he told her.

Amanda sighed and took a long, deep breath. "So…they are mad at me, then?" she asked. "Am I grounded? No allowance? Not even six dollars?"

Jasper laughed at Amanda's sarcasm. He could feel that she was losing some anger, but the resentment was still there. He also felt her guilt, shame, pride, and pain. Over the years Jasper had gotten used to being around a human child. One with so many changing emotions he sometimes needed to step out to take a break from her emotional outbursts, but lately he was not finding it as unbearable to tolerate. He loved Amanda like his sisters, brother and parents did.

"They understand why you are upset, Amanda," Jasper told her calmly, taking a page from his father's book. Amanda eyed him skeptically. "We do not expect you to be perfect. Simply try your best. For example, not walking on broken glass with bare feet or running into sharp object would be helpful. That's all!"

Amanda smiled at her peaceful cousin who rarely cracked a joke. She sat up and slid closer to him. He smiled back at her, sensing he was getting through to Amanda.

"I can say, without a doubt, you are not a burden. The love that we all feel for you is always present," Jasper said sincerely. "I would know!"

Amanda sighed and closed her eyes. She wanted to believe his words.

"Would you please just say you will try? That is all they want to hear you say," he encouraged, playing the good guy. Amanda pursed her lips and took another breath. She assumed she was not done for the night. An apology was usually required whenever she yelled or stormed away from an adult while they were speaking to her. Amanda let her breath out in a heavy puff and leaned into Jasper with her head on his shoulder. He smiled and put his arm around her. She was conceding.

"Can you give me a push?" Amanda whispered, feeling too vulnerable and weak to go downstairs to face her uncle without some encouragement. Jasper pulled her in for a hug and she sighed peacefully as a wave of reassurance and confidence flowed through her. He let her go and she hopped off the bed and walked to the door. She turned around as she left and smiled at her cousin.

"Thank you, Jazz," she told him. He bowed his head in a very gentlemanly fashion and then stood up to follow her out of her room as she made her way downstairs to apologize for her rude behavior at the family meeting. Jasper stayed close by for support. Amanda needed a little extra help sometimes.

* * *

**Allowance X Grade Calculator Legend**

Grade % $ 

A+(96-100) = 20

A (91-95) = 15

A- (86-90) = 10

B+ (81-85) = 5

B (76-80) = 3

B- (71-75) = 2

C+(66-70) = 1

C (61-65) = 0

C- (56-60) = -5

P (51-55) = -10

F (0-50) = -15

* * *

_*Note- So, ya…Amanda is still very stubborn and impulsive, but she is trying to do her best to fit in. Fit in with her family, at school, etc…just in general she is struggling with her family life. Kinda like a lot of preteen girls. She is not always nice, but think about what she has been through._

_I hope you are all still enjoying this story. I was kinda pleased with the Jasper and Amanda moment since I tend to neglect him a bit when I write, but he really is a good guy! He is Amanda's comfort, like Rosalie is for girly stuff (since Alice can't remember being human), and Alice is her best friend. Then, of course, Emmet is her playmate. Haha!_

_Coming Up Next__...First day of school, swim practice, and possible new friends._

**PLEASE REVIEW**


	27. Trying Our Best

**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Twenty-Seven**

|Trying Our Best|

Carlisle had accepted Amanda's apology for her language and loss of temper at the family meeting. She managed to pull the words, "try my best" from her lips, thanks to Jasper's influence, and Carlisle was pleased enough with her efforts. Esme and Elizabeth also forgave Amanda for her behavior and she was let off without any punishment seeing as they were all going through a transition period because of the move. A little bit of angst was understandable.

Alice and Amanda had watched 'Mean Girls' after Amanda ate dinner, something Alice thought was important for some reason. Amanda didn't bother to argue, she liked that movie, anyway. Unfortunately the two girls didn't get to finish the movie because it was a school night and Amanda needed to go to bed.

The next morning…

"Have a good day!" Elizabeth called out to the kids as they piled into Emmet's new Jeep.

Every time the Cullen's moved to a new town they were gifted with new vehicles to better update to the times. Rosalie was still on a high from getting to choose a brand new, candy apple red Bentley convertible for herself. Emmet got a new, black Jeep and Carlisle stuck to his classic, a Mercedes Benz in midnight blue. The family bought a silver Volvo for Esme and Elizabeth to use and Jasper kept his green Camero saying he liked it too much to give it up just yet. The yellow Porsche Alice loved, but couldn't drive sat next to the Camero in the garage as well.

"Bye, Liz! We will!" Alice replied happily, getting into the vehicle after Jasper.

"Yes Ma'am," Jasper said to be polite.

"Meh," Rosalie grunted as she buckled her seat belt as part of the law and not because she needed it for safety.

The Cullen kids were not that enthused to be going back to school, Alice being the exception. Emmet was beaming, though. He was the last into his mountain-high Jeep, proud to be the one who was in charge of driving everyone to and from school. After helping Amanda into the backseat he got into the driver's seat and roared the engine to life.

"Woot!" Emmet cheered and he waved to Elizabeth with a big grin in his dimpled face. She motioned for him to unroll the window and he did as she asked of him and waited for her to speak.

"Drive carefully," she told him. Amanda rolled her eyes from the back seat where Elizabeth could not see her. Rosalie did the same, but with slightly more attitude. Both blonde girls just wanted to go and get the first day over with. The first day at a new school was always the worst… and this time it was in the middle of a school year, the start of a new semester. They were going to stick out like sore thumbs for sure!

"Oh ya… no worries, Liz! The runt is safe with me!" Emmet laughed and Elizabeth couldn't help but smile as the Jeep drove off and she heard Amanda say, "You know that I am not that little anymore, right? I mean, look at Alice! If anyone should be called a runt it should be her!"

"Hey!" Alice shouted in fake insult. Elizabeth smiled and then went back inside the house to see what she could do with her day to fill the time. She wanted to make Amanda some cookies for after school as a 'welcome home from your first day… I hope it went well' treat. Partly, it was a bribe. Elizabeth wanted Amanda to see that she loved her and in spite of the changes made to her body, she was the same person on the inside.

Meanwhile, in the car on the way to school, Amanda leaned forward and tapped Rosalie's shoulder and then held out her hand. Rosalie sighed and reached into her purse and pulled out an eyeliner stick and a tube of red lipstick and slapped it down gently into Amanda's awaiting palm.

"Thank you!" Amanda said each word clearly and appreciatively. She was not allowed darker lipstick than a soft pink or a gloss, but she like to smudge a bit of bright red on her lips because they really helped to show off her natural pout and her blue eyes seemed even bluer in contrast. Eyeliner at school was forbidden until high school, Esme's rule. However, Amanda liked to wear a little bit and then smudge it for a soft shadow. Her almond-shaped blue eyes really stood out when she did this.

"You know, Amanda," Jasper said gently, "you look lovely, but you do not need that stuff to make yourself beautiful."

"Every girl needs a little bit of makeup, Jazzy!" Alice said sweetly, nudging Amanda. Alice was the one who had first shown her human cousin how to apply eyeliner, lipstick, blush, mascara, etc. Amanda nodded to show she agreed with Alice who, though she didn't need to, wore makeup everyday as well.

"Especially human girls!" Rosalie said harshly with a short laugh, but then she turned and smiled at Amanda to let her know she did not mean Amanda directly. Amanda was finished with Rosalie's make up so she passed it back and she stuck her tongue out at her perfect cousin. Rosalie wore make up as well, but was certainly the most gorgeous person in every room she walked into. Amanda hated to be compared to her flawless cousins, but Rosalie was the hardest to stand beside. People immediately scanned her up and down to see if there was resemblance between the two blonde girls. Amanda was beautiful for a human, but next to Rosalie she was plain Jane.

Amanda leaned back in her seat and hugged her shoulder bag. Wearing make up was not only fun, Amanda thought, but also she liked to look her best because she was always compared to her cousin's good looks. It helped her feel more confident if she fit with them a bit better. Today she needed confidence more than anything else because she was going to be in class with Alice, who was adorable and perfect in her sprite-like way. Amanda was more of a girl next door pretty… human pretty.

It was a fifteen minute drive into town coming from Sproat Lake where the house on the lake was situated. The drive had not been too painful for the Cullen gang. Emmet rambled on and on about his new, black Jeep so much, that even Rosalie told him to shut up. They got to the high school and parked the Jeep at the end of the drive to let Alice and Amanda out so they could walk across the street to the middle school.

"Have fun you two, little kiddies!" Emmet cooed in a baby-like voice. He had been teasing Alice about going to middle school for the last few weeks, thinking it was really funny. Alice picked up a rock and gave him a threatening glare to tell him to cool it or his Jeep would suffer. Amanda laughed and then a thought came to her about Emmet's Jeep.

"You know what I was thinking, Em?" She said. Emmet looked to Amanda to give her his full attention as he walked around his Jeep to check it out again. Rosalie leaned against it and folded her arms. She was trying to avoid eye contact with the students in the lot that were checking them all out. Alice giggled at Amanda's idea before Amanda pointed to his license plate and said, "You should put 'Baa baa' on the plate!"

"What? Why would I do that?" Emmet asked, scoffing off the idea right away, not getting the joke. Rosalie smiled.

"Because it is a black Jeep!" Jasper chuckled, "very clever!"

Amanda grinned proudly at her idea. Emmet was still thinking. His face was scrunched up in thought. "I still don't get it," he said quickly. Rosalie sighed and patted his back as the rest of the family all laughed at him.

"It's a nursery rhyme you big clod!" Amanda teased him. She rolled her eyes and then spun around, taking Alice's outreached hand, because Alice knew Amanda would be demanding it, and the pair of them took off towards the middle school. Rosalie exasperatingly explained the joke to Emmet as she, Jasper and her IQ challenged mate headed toward the front door of the High School.

"This is going to be so much fun, Mandi! Don't you think this will be fun?" Alice chimed merrily as they crossed the crosswalk and reached the other side of the street. Amanda didn't bother to turn her head towards Alice. She continued to walk at a fast pace towards the new school. She wanted to make sure she was not late for her first day.

"I don't know if 'fun' would be the right word, but I am glad you're with me," Amanda admitted. She had never been a fan of school, but having a friend in class right off the bat was comforting.

Alice skipped once and squealed with joy at Amanda's admission. Any expression of endearment was enough to make Alice happy. Amanda squeezed her cousin's hand, noticing that a lot of the other kids, some younger, some older, were all watching them make their way inside the school. Amanda was not intimidated at all by the stares. She was determined that she was not going to let them walk all over her this time though.

She had a disadvantage when she was going to school in Kipta. She had been the daughter of a welfare mother for the first few years and then she was the kid whose mother had killed themselves for the remainder of her years in that town.

When she was whisked away to Denali she had been the misfit, Canadian girl when she attended school there. She had been so distraught and withdrawn from the trauma of Elizabeth's death and all the changes that were being made to her life, not to mention all the lies she had to go by, that she had not made many friends at Denali Elementary. She had a few friends on her swim team, but just as she was starting to be comfortable in Alaska, she had to leave to come to Port Alberni.

'_This time is going to be different!'_ Amanda decided. This time Amanda was older, wiser and had a family behind her. The Cullens were not just any family. They were wealthy, charitable, smart and respected. The only downside Amanda could see was that her cousins were often shunned for being too perfect and other kids noticed that something was a bit off about them.

Alice was certainly quite the sight to see. She was like a little fairy, with nice clothes and an impish grin on her cheerful, striking face. Her perky, brilliant personality was not only a tiny bit alarming to anyone who did not know her well, it was intimidating. It was normal for her peers to label her as being 'weird'.

Amanda looked more like the other students than her pale cousin, but she was dressed far better, thanks to Alice and her own fashion flare. Her fortunate genes made her attractive, tall, and slender so she looked a few years older than some of the other girls in her year. She had all the makings to be one of the popular girls if that is what she wanted. Amanda didn't care about being popular, but she was sure that she would not let anyone treat her badly. No more Stacy Petersons, Ashley Talbots, or Emily Schultzes!

She and Alice went to the office and Alice talked to the secretary to get their schedules and locker information. They thanked the woman and went into the hallways so they could find their shared locker and could go over their schedules.

* * *

Later that day, Carlisle was finishing up with one of his new patients. The people were lined up out the door to get a peek at the handsome, new doctor who had just moved to town. It was a common occurrence for him on his first few working days to be swamped with curious onlookers. Carlisle didn't mind and did his best to treat everyone with the utmost of care.

"Have a good day, Mr Lapinski," he told an elderly man who had recently fractured three vertebrae in his lower back, as he showed him out the door. The older gentleman had been having a hard time finding a doctor would take his pain seriously. He had injured himself months prior, but at the time he did not report the pain, but when it got worse and finally wound up in the hospital, he never had the same doctor twice and the orders for pain medications got lost in the switches.

"Thank you so much, Dr Cullen."

"It is my pleasure. You get this prescription filled out right away and follow my written instructions. In a few weeks time I would like to see you again and we can talk about adjusting the dosage if need be."

"Yes, that sounds wonderful. Thank you. I am just so relieved to finally have someone listen to me."

"Anytime, Mr Lapinski. You can call me if you have any questions about your medication. That is not a problem," Carlisle replied kindly as the older man exited the building. Carlisle smiled at the room full of awaiting patients. Years of experience helped to keep composure in times like this. More than half of the people waiting to see him were only there to gawk at him. The room was filled with a majority of women.

Carlisle made his way to his front counter to pull out another file, but his plan was interrupted by his cell phone ringing. Usually he did not answer during the day, but the call display read 'Port Alberni Middle School' on the display so he excused himself from the lobby for a moment and tucked into one of the exam rooms to take the call.

"Hello, Carlisle Cullen speaking."

"Uh… hi!" Amanda's said. She was in the office on her lunch break using the phone from the reception. Alice hung by her side, trying not to be too perky or helpful to the administrative staff. She was under Amanda's orders to tone down the pixie so they both had a chance of making new friends and not being social outcasts.

"Amanda? Is everything alright?" Carlisle asked feeling a bit worried about receiving a midday call from his youngest child. He had hoped she would not get herself into any trouble on her first day. Surly, he thought, Alice would keep Amanda from getting into too much trouble.

"Ya. I called Esme first, but she doesn't have her phone with her," she said bluntly. Alice had told her Esme would not answer her phone, but Amanda tried it first anyhow. She never liked to call her uncle unless she was desperate. Carlisle relaxed and sighed when he realized Amanda was not into any mischief on her first day.

"Why do you need to call Esme?" he asked patiently.

"I talked to the gym teacher and he is the swim coach too and he told me that practice is after school and I don't have my swim stuff with me," Amanda explained quickly in a high, ranting voice. In her world this was a big issue. She continued, "I was going to ask Esme to bring it to me."

"Well, I am sure she would if she were home, dear. Esme went into town to run some errand and buy groceries today. I don't think she was planning on being home until after three," Carlisle explained calming, looking at his watch. He didn't want to keep his patients waiting for very much longer.

"Oh," Amanda said sadly. Carlisle felt badly to hear the disappointment in her voice. He was strict with her, but he wanted to her to be happy.

"I am sorry," he admitted. "I would love to leave work and bring you your swimming gear, but I do not yet have a receptionist and my waiting room is full of people who have come to see me. I bet Liz would love to bring you your swimming gear if you called home and asked her to do you the favor."

"Ya? You think she would be able to? Like… is it… safe?" Amanda whispered to make sure that the people bustling around in the office couldn't hear her. Carlisle chuckled and nodded in amusement, though Amanda could not see his gesture.

"I think if you asked her nicely, she would meet you in the parking lot to pass them off to you. Why don't you call her and ask her if she feels up to it?" He suggested.

"Okay. Oh! And I will need someone to pick me at five tonight at the Recreation Center. It is, like, right across the street from school," Amanda said hopefully. Alice gave Amanda a thumbs-up to tell her that Elizabeth would agree. Amanda smiled. She had not wanted to bother Elizabeth, but if her uncle thought it would be okay for her to leave the house unattended then Amanda would give plan B a try. Amanda was used to Esme catering to her needs since Elizabeth had been absent for so long. She had not even thought to call her 'mother'; the term was foreign and hard to recite, to ask her for a favor.

"Of course, Amanda. I will pick you up after work. I have to go now, sweetheart, but you should call Liz and ask her nicely if she would mind bringing you your swim bag. I am sure she would love to do you that favor. If she doesn't think it is a good idea then I am afraid you will have to miss practice for one more day," Carlisle encouraged Amanda to call her mother. He knew she was apprehensive about trusting Elizabeth.

"Ya. Okay. Thanks," Amanda said impatiently seeing as the hour of free time was slowly dwindling by and she wanted to call Elizabeth right away. "Bye then!" Amanda tacked on at the end.

"See you at five o'clock, dear," Carlisle told her kindly. He heard the click of the line going dead and he smiled and closed his phone. He tucked it into his pocket and went back out to greet his next patient in line. Amanda and Alice then called home and talked to Elizabeth. As Alice predicted, she was happy to do Amanda a favor. She told Amanda she would gather up her things and be right over to meet them both in the parking lot.

Amanda went to the girl's bathroom to wash off the eye makeup she was wearing. Her lipstick as almost gone already so Elizabeth would not notice that, but Alice told Amanda she had better not get caught wearing Rosalie's make up or she would be scolded. It was better to avoid a lecture. Amanda's strong personality would certainly get her into trouble if she were confronted about the make up rule. It was a sore spot for Amanda. She didn't like being treated like a little girl anymore.

Twenty minutes later, after a smooth transaction, Amanda thanked Elizabeth for her efforts and went back to inside the school with Alice who was pretending to munch on a granola bar. She handed it to Amanda to take a bite every once and a while so the bar would go down and eventually get eaten.

"That was nice of Liz," Alice said cheerfully. She smiled at Amanda.

"Ya. It went well. I never know what to expect. You all make her seem like a ticking bomb. I can't help but be a bit scared of her," Amanda admitted. Perhaps scared was not the right word. Amanda just meant that she had to hear about bloodlust, the burn of thirst and how hard it was for them to all resist the temptation of the smell of human blood. She had no idea what that must feel like, so she just went along with what her family of vampires told her.

"She might not be ready for large crowds, but Liz is surprisingly good at restraining herself. Dad told me she is so much better than any of the others were when they were first changed,"

"Even you?" Amanda asked. She knew that Alice and Jasper were not changed by Carlisle. Alice didn't know where she came from at all and Jasper was from the south. They had joined the Cullen family by choice, because they both wanted to live respectable. Alice had never killed. She saw that she would be a part of Carlisle's family and knew right away what diet to follow.

"I won't say I was not tempted. I have had many times when I had to leave a situation because I felt like I was losing control. I think my ability helps me to see where my choices lead me, so I don't have a lot of trouble avoiding temptation. If I felt like I might be a danger to you, I would see it coming and I would leave you."

"And Liz?" Amanda wondered, "Why is she able to control her… thirst… so well?"

Alice smiled because Amanda was whispering so softly that there was no way anyone in the noisy hallway could have overheard them.

"No one knows," Alice said with a shrug. Then she smiled and added, "Maybe she has a greater reason to sustain than the rest of us had."

Amanda narrowed her eyes at Alice for feeding her that cheesy line, insinuating that she was the reason that Elizabeth was doing so well. Alice smiled even brighter. She knew that Elizabeth was capable of controlling her bloodlust. She only wished Amanda could see that too.

* * *

The school day had gone fairy smoothly for Amanda. Not very many of the students talked to her or Alice. The students were more outgoing in her History class, one of two classes she didn't have with her strange, pale-white cousin. The other one was Science.

Amanda met a few girls in that class who introduced themselves and told her some of the gossip about the teacher staff and which nerds to avoid. The one student, these mean girls literally pointed out, was sitting close enough to hear them snickering as they divulged her by name. Amanda smiled and nodded, but she felt bad when the mousy looking girl with cropped, shoulder length brown hair and hazel eyes, masked with round glasses, overheard her name in conversation. Susie Bloom ducked her head and pretended not to have heard her name, but the sadness in her eyes told the true story.

The meek girl reminded Amanda of herself when she was younger. However, Susie Bloom didn't seem to be neglected. She was dressed in brand new, yet fashion challenged clothing, and was not sickly or gaunt in anyway, just unhappy. She was a plain girl without a smile. Amanda's stomach twisted at the sight. These mean girls she was talking to, were just like the ones she remembered from Kipta. Stacy Peterson, Ashley Talbot, and Emily Shultz.

Jennifer Beach was the Queen Bee this time, Amanda noted. Though she did not show her fear, the girl intimidated her. Jen, as her friends called her, was clearly befriending Amanda to check out the competition. She was attractive, as were her friends, with straight, dark brown hair down to her collarbone, dark brown eyes and a perfect, olive-skinned completion. She was wearing nice clothes, make up and acted like a snob. Amanda disliked her immediately, but didn't want to offend her. She was the girl to keep on her good side.

Jen's bleach blonde friends, Natalie Bay and Vanessa Watkins, were like wannabe Barbies, but their aim missed by a mile. They looked like mini prostitutes in their skimpy, trashy outfits. Natalie Bay had green eyes, long curly hair and a turned up nose. She was very tiny, almost Alice size. Vanessa Watkins had grey blue eyes, cropped hair and thin lips. She was so ditzy she didn't seem to know what the conversation was about half the time. They giggled at everything Jen said and because Jen was friendly towards Amanda, they were too. The fake sweetness was almost too much for Amanda to bear.

The bell rang and History was the last class of the day for Amanda so she met up with Alice at their shared locker.

"Those girls are mean girls, Mandi," Alice told Amanda as she took all her things and put them in her Guess bag and hung it over her thin, boney shoulder. Amanda laughed and rolled her eyes.

"Yep. Stacey, Ashley and Emily all over again, only I am not the underdog this time so they are being nice,"

"They are not nice girls," Alice warned, hoping Amanda did not plan to be friends with them. She could see what Jen, Natalie, and Vanessa were all about. "Are you sure you want to be involved with them?"

"Trust me, Ali," Amanda said, "We want them on our side. Otherwise, we are not going to have a good school year. And _we_ are going to make this fun, right?"

"Right!" Alice agreed. She bounced up and down excitedly. Amanda had promised her that they would have friends and not be rejects like they were used to being. Alice had always wanted to branch out and make friends, but when she was going to school with her siblings she had to fit in with the majority and the older Cullens kept a low profile. Amanda had other plans for Alice. She was sure that the two of them would be popular in no time if they played their cards right.

"I gotta go to the pool!" Amanda said, taking in a deep shaky breath. She was nervous being the new kid at school, but being the new kid joining a team was even harder. Alice patted her on the back.

"You'll be fine. I will walk you there."

There was a recreational center right between the High School and Middle School that both facilities used for their physical education programs. Alice made sure Amanda was safely inside where the swim team was meeting to stretch and chat before practice began and then she left to go home with Jasper and Emmet. They had to drop Rosalie off at Carlisle's office to work for the afternoon. Alice told Amanda that Carlisle and Rosalie were planning on picking her up when the closed up after work at five.

"Amanda, over here," Coach Reed said deeply, waving Amanda over to where he was standing with another man about the same age and a woman who was in her early twenties. There was a rather large group of teens gathered in their swimsuits, sitting on benches and towels on the tiled floor. They were all watching her as she made her way over to the group.

"I am glad to see your guardians have already signed all the forms for you to be on the team," he told Amanda. She nodded quickly. It had been the most important thing on her mind when Carlisle was registering her and Alice for school. She reminded him five or six times not to forget. He had laughed and told her that he would not, but Amanda was relieved to hear that her uncle had kept his word none-the-less.

"Everyone… this is Amanda Roth. She is a new student and a fellow swimmer. I hope you will all be kind and explain the routines to her if she needs help."

Amanda blushed at Mr Reed's introduction. He smiled and continued to speak.

"This is Coach Horn, though he doesn't mind going by his first name, Jarred, and this is Colleen Dover. Jarred teaches at the high school and we work together to coach all the divisions. Colleen is the assistant coach," Mr Reed introduced the other instructors to her. She raised her hand up in gesture to wave and smiled awkwardly. Colleen smiled back. She was a freckled girl with short brown hair and broad shoulders. She looked like she was very fit. Jarred's hair was thinning on top, but the rest of his fluffy, reddish-brown hair was curly. He had small eyes and no upper lip.

"You can call me Dan," Mr Reed offered with a pleasant smile. He was a tall, lean man was blue eyes and short, spiky, blonde hair. He was handsome for a human. Amanda almost laughed when she made this judgment because she thought of things in terms of vampire beauty and human beauty now. He motioned for Amanda to take a seat and said, "We are just having our weekly team meeting. Every Monday it is important to get here fifteen minutes before stretching."

"Yes sir," Amanda mumbled and took a seat. Dan continued to explain the swim practice times and then he got into a short speech about bringing valuables to practice. Amanda had heard these things all before, but she made a point to look interested. When the meeting was over she was excused to change into her suit and then she returned to stretch with the other swimmers. She took the time to look around and scope out the other swimmers that looked her age. They would be the ones in her division.

A division was like a grade, but for competitive swimming. It was based on your age when you began a swim season. Amanda was in division four, but she was familiar with the races. In division one, two, and three they don't only have 50-meter and 100-meter races, but division four to seven will have races up to 200 meters in length. Amanda had been in division three in Denali so this would be her first opportunity to compete in the longer races, though she had practiced them many times. Her favorite stroke was butterfly because she was good at it and not very many others are. She was decent at the other strokes as well; so another good race for her was the IM (individual medley). Most swimmers swam freestyle and didn't frequent the butterfly or IM events. Amanda noticed this and used it to her advantage to gain medals.

"Roth!" Amanda heard being called from behind her. She thought nothing of it at first but when she heard it again, "Roth!" she spun around and faced Jarred. "I am going to call you Roth, okay? There is a senior swimmer named Amanda and I don't want to get you two confused."

"Sure," Amanda agreed blandly. She could care less. Something about being called by her last name made her feel more athletic. It was like a football coach calling all their boys by their last names. It was more intense for some reason. She would have to get used to being called Roth instead of Peppel, though. That was going to be the real challenge.

She was instructed to get into the first lane with a group of division three swimmers. It was the lowest division at the practice because usually division's one and two were for elementary school students. Amanda squeaked at the cold water. It only felt that way now, once she got going she would warm up. She felt someone bump into her back sharply and winced to rub the sore spot where she had been elbowed.

"Oh, oh, sorry," Susie said apologetically. Amanda faced the girl. It was Susie Bloom from her History class. The same girl that Jen Beach was making fun of for being a 'loser'. Amanda smiled lightly.

"That's okay."

"So, is this your first time on a swim team?" Susie asked meekly, wondering if she should even bother talking to Amanda, who was a lot taller, leaner, and to be honest, prettier than she was. Susie was always putting herself down and didn't think very highly of herself and it was very readable from the way she behaved. Amanda opened her mouth, took a breath and shook her head before speaking.

"I started swimming a few years ago in Alaska and I liked it so much I got onto a team there," she divulged. She wasn't about to say she was a good swimmer. She had no idea what kind of a pond she was in now. For all she knew this swim team could have a lot of very good swimmers who were better than she was. Amanda had gotten used to being the best in Denali, though. She hoped she would still be on the A list in Port Alberni too.

"Oh," Susie said. She looked like she wanted to say more, but she was too shy and Colleen came over and gave them a set to swim. Amanda was relieved to have something to break up the awkward feeling between her and Susie. She already had her hair up in a bun and under her favorite swim cap so she pulled her dark, tinted goggles on and she went on her designated time. It was not many lengths into the set when she was moved up to the first time slot. That meant she got to go first every time they started from the wall. It was clear that Amanda was at the top of the pyramid on this swim team as well. In her age division at least.

Amanda smiled to herself. Swimming was one thing in her life that she didn't have to try her best to be the best.

To be continued...

* * *

_Coming up next chapter...A blow to the face, a silly song (be sure to check out the first link on my profile if you are curious), a fake out, someone gets grounded, and someone makes the right choice. _

_Chapter previews are available. I will send one to you via review response. Also...if you don't know about my fanart, there are many drawings for WOL and other stories that can be found on my deviantart gallery (link is on my profile). Thank you for reading. :)_


	28. Friend or Foe

_Before you read this chapter…if you are able to and can take a joke...check out the link at the top of my profile page. It is the first link. It is 'The Counts Song' but remixed in a funny way. I was shown this video by RandomSugarRush and I laughed so hard I cried. Well…there is a moment in this chapter when Amanda will reference this song, but the clean version, and it would be funny if you all understood what she was singing. So ya…please go to that link or find 'The Count Song Censored' on YouTube and have a good laugh! Hahaha!_

_Enjoy the chapter. It is filled with goofy Emmet and Amanda fluff, but also it is setting up something that will be addressed later on having to do with Amanda's school experience is going to be like this time around. It won't be the same as when she was 8/9 and living in Kipta. ;)_

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* * *

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**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Twenty-Eight**

|Friend Or Foe|

Practice was an hour long, with fifteen minutes to thirty minutes of warm up and stretching, so by the time Amanda was finished and showered it was already past five o'clock and it was getting dark out. She took another look in the change room mirror before she left the room. She had a crescent shaped bruise starting to form under her right eye from being punched in the face by Susie Bloom during a set of backstroke. Amanda poked her cheekbone and winced, making a disgusted face at her reflection in the mirror.

Susie Bloom was not only a slow swimmer – she was not very coordinated either. It had not been so bad; Amanda didn't like to draw attention to herself, so she kept on swimming after the incident happened. Susie apologized repeatedly for hitting Amanda, but at the end of practice when they were supposed to be swimming 100 meters of freestyle for a warm down, Susie decided to throw in a few breaststroke kicks right as Amanda was swimming past her and she heeled Amanda again in the same eye. Susie looked sick with guilt. Her mother was on the sidelines yelling something at her so Amanda smiled and forgave Susie again.

She didn't want to chance run into the clumsy girl, so Amanda walked out of the change room swiftly with her head down. She then carried on walking until she got outside the building. Her hair was wet and steam filed off it when it hit the crisp, winter air. She smelled like mangos because of her conditioner. When Amanda spotted her uncle's dark blue Mercedes she hurried over to the back, passenger side door and got inside. Rosalie was in the passenger seat and she turned around.

"How did it… oh my goodness! Did you mouth off to the wrong person?" Rosalie asked losing track of her question when she saw the swollen shiner Amanda was sporting under her eye. Carlisle turned around to look. He frowned when he saw Amanda's black eye. It really was only pink and purple in color. It really wasn't as bad as it could have been, but he never liked to see her hurt.

"No…" Amanda said defensively. Rosalie waited for Amanda to explain. Amanda shrugged, brushing it off, not wanting to make a big deal about it. Susie had already apologized to her over and over. "This girl hit me in the face when she was doing her backstroke," She admitted in a gruff tone. She heaved a sigh and leaned back into the leather back seat and did up her buckle.

"Ouch," Rosalie said sympathetically, grimacing. Amanda raised her eyebrow at her cousin who was being caring for just a minor injury. Rosalie was kind to Amanda for the most part, because they were family, but it was abnormal for Rosalie to be overly compassionate, especially over something so minor. "What? I care!" Rosalie protested to the questioning look Amanda was giving her.

Amanda laughed as Carlisle smiled at Rosalie and then drove out of the parking lot and onto the main road. Amanda thought she understood what was going on. She figured that Rosalie probably had a lecture from her father about showing the proper compassion to a person who was injured. It had been Rosalie's first day working with Carlisle after school. She was going to spend every afternoon and Saturday with him at the medical practice to gain work experience in his profession. Being around sick people, and a bit of blood, was good practice for Rosalie if she planned to carry on in her father's footsteps.

"Anyway…" Amanda continued so Rosalie would stop glaring. "Then later on, the same girl kicked me again! In the same eye! She swims all wonky and crooked," Amanda explained shrilly. She paused for a second and then added, "She kinda sucks."

"Is she handicapped or something?" Rosalie asked coldly, studying her well-manicured nails instead of looking at Amanda when she spoke. Amanda laughed with a little snort on the end. Carlisle gave Rosalie a disapproving side-glance, but didn't interrupt._ 'So much for Rosalie learning how to be compassionate and understanding!_' Amanda thought_. 'Check, tactfulness, off the list as well!'_

"I don't think so, but she is all over the place in the lane. She is just awkward, I guess. I don't think she even likes being there. She looked miserable. I saw her mother sitting in the stands watching. Like, she was actually there to watch a practice," Amanda announced critically, "she was shouting at Susie to 'pick up the pace' and to 'move over' and just all this other stuff that was so bossy! It was really annoying. I almost felt bad for Susie."

"Almost?" Rosalie questioned, again not facing Amanda. She was texting Emmet on her phone at the same time, only half paying attention. "Her mom sounds like a nag!" Rosalie added. Carlisle coughed lightly in scolding. Rosalie looked at him and shrugged.

"She hit me in the face. Let's get real here. I'm the victim, okay?" Amanda squeaked defensively. She didn't want to feel sorry for Susie. However, Amanda did not like the way Susie's mother was berating her at practice. Susie had seemed too nervous having a watchful eye on her the whole time. That must have made the poor, meek girl even more flighty and skittish in the pool.

"Maybe this Susie needs a friend like you to help her improve her technique," Carlisle suggested pleasantly. He sounded so much like a parent it made Amanda roll her eyes. Rosalie did the same thing and neither girl responded. "You never know. You might end up with a great friend if you offer her some kindness."

"Okay, Dr Phil!" Rosalie joked sarcastically because her dad sounded so serious it was amusing. Amanda giggled too.

"She kicked me in the eye, Carlisle! That doesn't exactly spell friendship!" Amanda stated with a smile.

"Alright," Carlisle sighed gently, "it was only a suggestion."

* * *

Approximately fifteen minutes after leaving the recreation center, the three of them arrived home. The long, private driveway leading down towards the lake where the large house sat was wet from the rain and glistening in the moonlight as Amanda got out of the car and hurried into the house. She ran up the stairs to the second floor and threw her bag down by the stairs so she could take it up to her room on the third floor later. She ran into to kitchen, her adrenaline was pumping from the work out. Alice was suddenly by her side, bouncing with just as much or more energy.

"Sorry you got hurt, Mandi!" Alice said, hugging Amanda from the side. "I didn't see that one coming… but it is for the best. You'll see!"

Amanda shrugged and Alice released her. Amanda smelled something in the air that pleased her so she sniffed Alice's shoulder. She thought she smelled cookies, but that could easily have been Alice's scent, which often smelled like sugar. She pursed her lips as she thought about the scent she was picking up. It was not quite the same as Alice's sweet smell.

"You're right!" Alice piped up, "Liz made you cookies!"

"Ooo yummy!" Amanda stated gleefully and she ran over to the cookie jar on the counter and lifted the lid. A cold hand came down on hers gently, but with a firm force that pushed the lid back into place. It was Elizabeth's.

"Dinner first, then cookies," she said with a smile, "have you forgotten my rules?"

Amanda's eyes narrowed, but she didn't turn around to face Elizabeth. Esme didn't let her get away with eating junk before a proper meal was consumed first, either. Amanda didn't bother to reply. She tried to walk around the counter, but Elizabeth met her on the other side. Elizabeth's mouth dropped open when she saw Amanda's eye for the first time. She tilted Amanda's face up to the light with a few fingers pressed under Amanda's chin for control. Amanda roughly moved away.

"What happened to your face? Were you in a fight?" Elizabeth asked, looking concerned. Amanda was insulted that everyone jumped to the conclusion she had somehow brought the injury upon herself.

"No!" Amanda insisted strongly.

"A girl kicked her in the eye at swim practice," Alice explained helpfully. She bounced on her heels as she told Amanda's story. Elizabeth turned from Alice to Amanda and she frowned.

"Well, that is unfortunate. Why don't you have a seat at the table? I have your dinner almost ready. You must be hungry after your swim," Elizabeth told Amanda. She obeyed and took a seat at the kitchen table. Carlisle came into the kitchen and bowed his head to Alice and Elizabeth in greeting.

"Mom and the boys went hunting. They should be home before eight," Alice shared as she grabbed the first aid kit from inside the cupboard and pulled out an ice pack. She handed it to her father with a big, helpful smile on her face.

Rosalie walked into the room at the same time, holding an identical pack and her jaw dropped when she saw that Alice had beaten her to the punch. Alice stuck her tongue out at her sister. Rosalie turned around and left before anyone else saw her there. She hated when Alice stole her thunder like that. Rosalie went back to the first aid kit in the hallway and put the unused ice pack away before heading out to the garage to fiddle around with the engine of her new Bentley. She loved that car like it was a beloved pet.

"Thank you, Alice," Carlisle said as he squeezed the pack enough to break the seal inside and make the chemical reaction begin. It would be cool in a few minutes. He placed the ice pack on the table and he lifted Amanda chin up like Elizabeth had done to take a better look at her swollen under eye. Amanda let him look since he would have insisted if she tried to protest. Carlisle couldn't help being both a concerned parent and a doctor. He knew it bothered Amanda when he was too doting when she got hurt, but he also wanted the best for her. He gently probed her cheekbone and was satisfied that there was no damage to it and Amanda's eye itself was not bloodshot or tearing.

"Can you see me well, Amanda?" he asked, covering her left eye and waving his finger in front of her right eye slowly a few times. "Any spots in your vision? Any blurriness?" Amanda brushed his hand away and glanced at him impatiently.

"I'm fine!" She said dully. She was hungry. Elizabeth poured a glass of milk and set it down in front of her. Amanda reached for it eagerly.

Carlisle smiled and let her attitude roll off him. He was no stranger to Amanda's pushing him away. She was making progress, though. She was not quite as vocal about her hate for him as she was when he first revealed to her what he and the rest of the family truly was and what Elizabeth had become. Amanda had not taken that news well. She vowed to hate him forever and she stubbornly went almost an entire year without speaking to him. Carlisle had not been sure she would ever forgive him for saving Elizabeth in the way he did. Alice was the one who reassured Carlisle that, in time, they would all be a happy family.

"Alright. No harm done it looks like. Eat your dinner and then I want you to ice that bruise for fifteen to twenty minutes to eliminate some of the swelling," Carlisle said, tapping ice pack he had set beside Amanda on the table. He would be patient and wait for the day when Amanda would accept his love and his family's love. At least now she was speaking to him on a daily basis and not seething each time she saw him.

"Okay," Amanda agreed as she picked up glass of milk sitting in front of her and she guzzled half of it down. Carlisle smiled and patted Amanda on the back lovingly. He turned his kind smile over to Elizabeth as she came to give Amanda her plate of food.

Elizabeth forced herself to smile as she carried the plate of prepared food over to the table for her adopted daughter. It had been so long since she served Amanda food. Elizabeth used to enjoy the task, but it was bittersweet now. The food smelled horrible and she felt like an imposter as she took over for Esme who had been doing this job for the past three years. Elizabeth wanted Amanda's love more than anything she could think of in this world. She had eternity now, but the only thing that kept her spirit alive was Amanda. She hoped that it was not too late for them to rebuild their relationship.

"Thanks," Amanda mumbled as Elizabeth put the plate in front of her. Amanda was hungry so she began to eat right away without looking up at her mother standing over her, watching her with kind, wistful eyes.

Amanda noticed that the plate had been warmed up, but the carrot sticks were ice cold, just as she liked them. She picked one up and smiled to herself. Elizabeth had remembered how much she hated cooked carrots. Amanda bit into the orange vegetable with a sense of reassurance. She was glad that Elizabeth had not changed completely from her human self. Amanda ate quickly and when her plate was clear Elizabeth picked it up and replaced it with another. Applesauce cookies with icing glaze.

"Nice!" Amanda complimented with a nod and she picked up a big cookie and bit into it. Elizabeth beamed. She had successfully cooked a human meal to Amanda's liking.

* * *

After dinner and doing as she was told, Amanda tossed out the ice pack that was beginning to lose its cool. Since no one had homework that evening, the Cullen kids were free to do whatever they wanted. The same went for Amanda, who was usually the one stuck at the dining room table falling asleep on her notebook. However, when she was homework free, Amanda liked to watch the television like any other kid. The Cullen's only had one television in the house, as part of a rule. They had to share. Emmet hogged the television most of the time and Amanda like to bug him to get control of it. Tonight was no exception.

"Emmet!" Amanda said sweetly, tapping him on one of his huge, muscular shoulders, interrupting him from his video game where he was shooting at something. "My turn to use the TV!"

"Ha! Um…no!" Emmet said with a laugh. After all, it was not as if Amanda could really win the war of the remote with him if they really got into it. She had to use the only weapon she had. She would use her persistence and talent for annoying him to push him out of the room.

The flat screen flickered at the imaginary gunfight was being played out. Emmet nudged Amanda away from with his elbow as she got closer to him to say something into his ear. Amanda liked to tease him and she thought it was funny to bug him when he was concentrating on something that was important to him. She jumped onto his back and clung to him and began to sing in his ear.

"Mwha ha ha ha ha…You know that I am called The Count, Because I really love to count, Sometimes I sit and count all day, But, ah…sometimes I get carried away…." Amanda sang slowly with Count Dracula's accent. She didn't recall watching Sesame Street very often as a child, but she did remember this one song by The Count. She knew that it was kind of offence to her vampire family members to be singing about another vampire, who was a purple, fictional puppet who likes to count, but it amused her so she carried on. Emmet continued to ignore her and play his game.

"I count slowly, slowly, slowly getting faster… Once I start the counting it is very hard to stop! HEY! Faster! Faster! It is so exciting! I could count forever. Count until I drop!"

Amanda's voice was getting louder and her speed was increasing as she sang. Emmet shook his shoulder to try to get her to fall off him, but she clung on and continued to sing,

"One. Two. Three. Four… One, two, three, four, one, two, three, four, one, two… I love counting whatever the amount! One, two three four, Hi ya ya ya hi ya ya ya… one, two three, four. One two… That's the song of The Count!"

Emmet lost his patience when he finally finished his game and his score was one point less his record. He dropped the controller and stood up with Amanda still clung to his back. He silently, with a straight face, grabbed her thin arms and lifted them off from around his thick neck and he flipped her off him and onto the sofa beside Alice, who was watching with amusement at the whole scene.

Rosalie was snickering from her room upstairs where she sat, curled up in a chair with a book. Elizabeth and Esme were in the next room, piecing together a quilt that they were making for charity and eavesdropping as well. They liked to hear Amanda happy and they knew that Emmet was not deprived of time on the television. Jasper and Carlisle were upstairs in Carlisle's study going over some legal documentation they needed to get in order to complete Amanda's birth certificate that would prove she was Elizabeth's birth child if ever confronted formally. They had stopped what they were discussing when Amanda had begun her taunting song. Carlisle was laughing pretty hard, trying to contain his feelings because Jasper found it so funny.

Amanda was silent for a moment, listening to the laughter coming from the rooms around her, it made Emmet more ticked off. She waited until Emmet turned his back on her and then she stood up on the arm of the sofa and jumped into the air and landed on him again. He knew better than to let her miss him or to not catch her, so he played along and didn't fling her off his back. He groaned when she continued to sing to him. This time, she dropped her voice so it was deep and she slowed the tempo to a serious tone, which made the words seem even more ridiculous.

"I count the spiders on the wall, I count the cobwebs in the hall, I count the candles on the shelf, and sometimes when I'm alone… I count myself! Oh ya… I count slowly, slowly, slowly….." Amanda sang, starting over again and picking up speed. She jumped down from Emmet and snatched the remote control and danced as she sang the rest of the song very fast. Emmet covered his ears in attempt to ignore her, but he saw that Amanda was determined to sing that annoying Count Dracula song until he was driven out of the room. Amanda began to chase Emmet around the room so he could not avoid her without leaving the family room.

"…Getting faster… Once I start the counting it is very hard to stop! Hey! Faster! Faster! It is so exciting! I could count forever. Count until I drop! One. Two. Three. Four… One, two, three, four, one, two, three, four, one, two I love counting…. whatever the amount!" Amanda shouted. Emmet threw his hands down from his ears in defeat and he left the room, conceding the television to Amanda. She finished the song even as he flew out of the room. "One, two three four, Hi ya ya ya hi ya ya ya… one, two three, four. One two…. That's the song of The Count! Hey!"

"You are so annoying!" Emmet shouted from upstairs where he found comfort in his mate, Rosalie, who was trying to be compassionate to his feelings. Emmet usually won in any fight, but when it came to Amanda he could not do anything to her for simply singing him out of a room, but oh, how that song drove him insane.

"Yep!" Amanda agreed. She was still a bit hyper from her earlier workout at the pool, but she was wearing out now from the long day at school. She sighed and took a breath as she fell back into the sofa, out of breath from singing that song so fast, but she was very pleased with herself. Emmet was gone and she had the TV all to herself now. Amanda turned on the television and put her feet up on the coffee table.

"That song is so demeaning," Alice chimed merrily, coming over to take a seat on the sofa to watch 'Video On Trial' with Amanda who rested on that channel. Alice was still talking about 'The Count Song'. Amanda smiled proudly and nodded. The family could take vampire clichés with a grain of salt, but Emmet for some reason hated when she impersonated the purple Count from Sesame Street. He said it was insulting to his monsterhood. Amanda enjoyed holding one thing over his head.

* * *

Amanda woke up the next morning, curled up to something frigid and solid. She made a mental note before even opening her eyes that it must be Alice coming in to wake her for school, no doubt. She moaned and pushed herself away from the rock that was in her space and then rolled over and hid her face under her arm.

"Tickle, tickle…" Emmet chuckled and his cold fingers lightly pinched Amanda's sides and she screamed and bolted up in bed. She turned around to him with a fierce glare, though her hair was covering the majority of her face so it was hard to see. She smacked at her face to move the hair away and winced when she accidently touched her sore eye. Emmet laughed at her confusion.

"Go away, Em!" Amanda belted out, frowning deeply as she smoothed out her disarray of hair that was tangled around her face. She looked up at him and took a better look at him. She gasped and her mouth opened wide in horror when she noticed he was wearing her favorite latex swim cap. It was purple and matched her Denali team suit that was purple and black.

"Take it off! You'll rip it!" Amanda yelled, rising to her knees and reaching out to grab Emmet, who was faster and he moved off the bed and stood out of her reach. Amanda nearly fell off the bed. She glowered at him as he snickered at her misfortune. This was his funny way of getting her back from taking the TV from him last night. Emmet's face was so smug that Amanda decided she would not let him get the better of her. She smiled at him menacingly and then she let herself topple off the side of the bed like she had stopped herself from doing a second sooner.

She hit the floor with a dramatic thump on purpose and then where she had hit her shoulder she grabbed it and cried out in a yelp. Truthfully, it did hurt. She had landed hard on her left side, her shoulder and arm taking the brunt of the fall, but she knew she was not seriously injured. She was going to milk it though, to teach Emmet a lesson: he could not mess with her. She sat up, holding her arm and she rocked a bit like she often did when she bumped her knee or her head. Something about movement as a distraction helped her get over pain. This time it was all for show.

"What the…?" Emmet stated dumbly, confused at what just happened. He bent down to see if she was all right, even though she had done this to herself. Amanda hissed at him.

"Ow, ow, owww," she cried believably, her voice high, "why did you do that?"

"Do what? You did this to yourself! You…you…" Emmet stuttered as Amanda's bedroom door opened and the rest of the family, besides Jasper and Alice, rushed in to see what the commotion was about. Amanda's little act was so good she even had tears welling in her eyes. Carlisle rushed to her side immediately to access her injuries; Esme knelt down next to her to stroke her hair. Amanda had them all fooled. Elizabeth stood back, but watched with concerned eyes. Rosalie came from behind Emmet and pulled at the swim cap till it snapped off his head.

"What hurts, sweetheart? Tell me what happened," Carlisle instructed authoritatively. He was dressed nicely for work in grey slacks and a white dress shirt. His silver tie was half done up and hung from his neck in Amanda's line of vision as he reached out for her arm. She held it tighter and she gasped as he tried to take it from her. He didn't let her protest deter him and began looking her over with a medical eye.

"My shoulder," Amanda told him with a shaky voice, "I landed on it when I fell off the bed. Emmet stole my cap and he wouldn't give it back. I tried to grab it from him, but he moved and I fell off!"

"Emmet!" Esme scolded, looking over to her son, who was gob smacked from the entire scenario. He was not sure what was going on, but he was in the doghouse for sure.

"No way! She did this to herself! She did it on purpose!" Emmet defended himself, sounding slightly ridiculous in light of the fact that Amanda sat hunched over on the wood floor with tears in her eyes and clinging to her arm protectively as Carlisle tried to take a closer look at the damage. Rosalie shook her head at Emmet disapprovingly and Elizabeth frowned, but tried not to judge him to harshly. She knew Amanda probably contributed to the accident, but she stayed silent seeing as Amanda seemed to be injured.

"You have been warned about this behavior, Emmet! You cannot play so roughly with Amanda. Accidents can happen and people can get hurt. What were you thinking, taunting her like that?" Esme lectured her son all the while soothing Amanda by placing a hand on the girl's back.

"I was just playing with her. Getting her back for singing that stupid Count Song last night. She is the one who let herself fall off her bed. She fell on purpose to get me in trouble. She is evil minded… just evil, I tell ya!"

"Emmet," Carlisle said his name calmly, with a tone of disappointment in his voice. Amanda wanted to laugh, but she knew better. She sniffed and looked down at her arm.

"But… but… she's fakin' it!" Emmet protested. Carlisle pushed back Amanda's short sleeve to expose her bare shoulder that was red from where it hit the floor. Emmet opened his mouth to speak again, but he was cut off.

"Enough, Emmet. This is not the time for excuses. What you did was childish. You are much older than Amanda and much stronger. Horseplay of this kind is dangerous and exactly what your father and I have been warning you two about," Esme ranted. Emmet hung his head, defeated.

"Sorry Mom," Emmet said sadly.

"I am not who you need to be apologizing too," Esme replied lightly, looking down at Amanda who had dropped the charade a bit as she let Carlisle take her arm in his own to move it slowly. Emmet nearly growled in annoyance. Amanda had everyone on her side it seemed. Amanda had always been a fairly good liar and since she had actually fallen on her shoulder when she hit the floor, she was not lying entirely about the pain. Amanda gasped as she allowed her uncle to squeeze her shoulder.

"Oh, honey," Esme cooed and she pulled all of Amanda's hair back off her face and placed it over Amanda's right shoulder to get it out of the way as Carlisle examined the shoulder in question. Amanda whimpered as he took her arm to lift it a bit. He watched her carefully for her reaction. Amanda decided she had better not get too carried away and so she didn't make too much more of a fuss.

"I am sorry _you_ hurt _yourself_, Amanda," Emmet said stiffly giving her a knowing glare.

"That's okay, Em. It doesn't hurt so bad now," She admitted forgivingly. Enough was enough and she only wanted to get Emmet scolded and she had done that. She couldn't milk this injury much longer or she might lose the privilege of going to swim practice after school.

"Is the pain less now, Amanda?" Carlisle asked her, putting her arm down by her side. Amanda nodded honestly. He was pleased with the mobility she had in her arm and was sure nothing was broken. Rosalie came back into the room with that ice pack and handed it to him. It was activated already and he placed it over Amanda's shoulder with care. Amanda twitched from the cold against her skin, but she used her right hand to reach up and hold the pack in place. Esme smiled and rubbed Amanda's back, relieved to hear the news. Elizabeth relaxed a bit from her position.

"There we go. Does that help, darling?" Esme asked lovingly. Amanda nodded again. Emse leaned forward and kissed Amanda's cheek gently.

"Ya, I think I'm okay now," Amanda repeated quietly with a touch of uncertainty as she tested her arm out. She moved it cautiously, but to show that she was well enough to go to school and later to her swim practice. Then she leaned forward to get balanced on her feet so she could stand. Esme stood up and steadied Amanda from behind.

"I am glad. It appears to be only bruised. I suspect you may have jarred the ball from its socket when you landed on your shoulder, but you didn't fully dislocate the joint. There is no break or sprain that I can tell, but if it is bothering you, Amanda, perhaps we should rest your arm in a sling for today," Carlisle suggested as he helped her up. Amanda's horror was obvious on her face. She hated showing weakness still to this day. It was something she had not gotten over from her childhood. She shook her head, no. Emmet huffed and folded his arms across his big chest.

"Maybe she should wear one to be safe. I mean, she did jump… oops… I mean fall off the bed very hard. You all heard the thump!" he said harshly, staring at Amanda with narrowed eyes.

"No!" Amanda blurted out, "I don't need to. It is fine now!"

"Better safe than sorry, right?" Emmet pressed with a cheeky grin. "Sling the arm!"

Amanda decided not to react to him or else she might get caught in her lie. She looked to her uncle with her big, blue eyes, hoping for some support. Carlisle placed a hand on her other shoulder and smiled down at her, but he spoke to Emmet.

"It is not necessary if she feels alright to go on without one," Carlisle explained softly. Amanda had full range of motion and she was not in pain unless pressure was placed on the area she fell. It was only a bruise, after all. It would probably not be visible either, not like the purple rim under her right eye that she got last night at swim practice. Amanda had known it all along and no one was going to deny her injury. She had successfully gotten away with her trickery and Emmet had been properly schooled about not messing with her.

Carlisle bowed his head and left Amanda's room to finish getting himself ready for work. Elizabeth watched Amanda curiously before she retreated out of the bedroom. Esme kissed the top of Amanda's head once and then walked over to Emmet and grabbed him by the ear. "In the hallway. We need to have a little chat!" she demanded as she towed him out of the room by his ear. Emmet winced and hurried along beside his mom, hunched over to avoid pulling. Rosalie shook her head with amusement over her mate's idiocy and tossed Amanda's purple swim cap on the bed before she trailed out of the room after everyone, shutting the door behind her as she went. Amanda smiled and went to her closet to pull out an outfit to wear.

* * *

When the Cullen kids arrived at school Emmet dropped Amanda and Alice off in front of the Middle School before parking in the High School's parking lot. Jasper smirked at Amanda as she got out. He was onto her. Alice had either told him about her deceit or he had felt her betrayal. Amanda stuck her tongue out at him playfully, knowing Jasper would not tell on her. He didn't like confrontation and he knew that Emmet liked to play games of similar nature on Amanda. Jasper figured that this was Amanda's revenge and he would not tell on her in order to keep himself and Alice's knowledge of the incident from being found out. Besides that, Jasper thought it was quite impressive for Amanda to have pulled the wool over everyone's eyes this morning.

"Have a good day, evil child!" Emmet huffed as he slowed the Jeep to a stop.

"Oh, leave her alone, babe. She's hurt," Rosalie said out of the blue, sounding sincerely compassionate once again for her human cousin's well-being. "How is your arm, dear?"

"Dear?" Amanda, Emmet, and Jasper all asked at the same time, questioning the caring concern Rosalie was showing. Alice would have joined in if she had not seen that one coming. She chimed in with a sweet laugh instead.

"What? I care!" Rosalie justified but then she got her grump back and flicked her hand in the air in Amanda's direction and said, "Oh, just get out already!"

"Ya!" Emmet agreed boisterously, "Get out and go to your kiddy school and play with glue and stuff!"

Amanda rolled her eyes and hopped out of the Jeep to the pavement below her. Emmet did not face her when he spoke. Esme had given a proper scolding outside in the hallway of Amanda's bedroom that morning. He was grounded from playing video games or watching television for one week for disobeying his parent's rules. One; rough housing with the human, two; entering someone's room without their permission to do so and, three; lying instead of confessing when he had made a mistake. Only, he had only broken two of those three in reality. Amanda got away making the others believe he committed the latter offense.

"Oh, whatever, Em! You're the one who got in trouble, not me!" she taunted him back. Emmet rolled his window up and stuck up his nose in response and then drove away. He was still stung by her act this morning since he was grounded, but he forgave her. After all, he had done plenty of pranks that got Amanda in trouble over the years as well. They were usually even at the end of the day. Now he was giving her the cold shoulder, but the ice would melt and by that evening they would be goofing around together again. That was their routine. Alice giggled and took Amanda's hand to tow her towards the front doors of the grey, school building.

"You are so bad!"

"So bad I'm good, though," Amanda said with a sly grin, giggling to herself gleefully after she spoke. Alice laughed and nodded in agreement. Amanda was not going to be caught this time. She was in the clear with Alice on her side and Jasper taking the Fifth.

"He deserves it… he is always bugging you and stealing your things," Alice said to justify what Amanda had done to her big, dopey brother.

"I know, right? I just got so mad when he woke me up by tickling me. Then when I saw he had my swim cap on his giant head, stretching it out, that I had to get him back. I am still not over the time he told on me to Liz at my birthday. And for all the times he threw food around in the kitchen and then left me to take the blame," Amanda ranted as they made their way toward their locker to hang up their winter coats and grab their books for class. Amanda had Science first thing and Alice had History. In the afternoon they had the same classes, but reversed. All the ones in between they had together.

"Emmet can be a pest, that is for sure," Alice chirped. The first bell rang and Amanda groaned, lifting her heavy Science textbook into her arms. She winced a bit when she moved her shoulder too high. Alice smiled and said, "I suppose that is the price to pay for a good comeback."

"It was worth it!" Amanda decided as she slammed the locker door shut and smiled goodbye to Alice who stopped Amanda to tell her something. Amanda waited for Alice to tell her the vision, but Alice smiled and changed her mind, releasing Amanda.

"You will make the right choice!" Alice decided.

"Uh… okay then," Amanda mumbled, confused, "see you in Math class."

"I miss you already," Alice sang as she twirled down the hallway in the opposite direction, almost hitting a sixth grader with her shoulder bag in the process. Alice knew she was going to miss so she just smiled at the alarmed boy and danced off to her class. Amanda wanted to laugh at Alice for being so exuberant. She had tried to tell Alice to tone down her cheerful, perky way at school, but Alice had only stuck to that for one day and she was already back to her usual self.

As Amanda made her way into her classroom and looked around to find an empty seat, she only saw two places free. One was a stool beside Jennifer Beach, the most popular, mean girl in the seventh grade and possibly, the whole school. The other free seat was the table behind Jennifer's. Susie Bloom sat by the window with the isle seat still available. The choice was up to Amanda. Would she take the closer spot, by Susie who was eyeing Amanda hopefully as she pushed the stool out a bit with her foot so Amanda would see it? Or would Amanda walk on by and take the seat next to Jennifer?

"Hey Jennifer!" Amanda greeted in a pleasant voice, walking past Susie without making eye contact. She quickly sat down on the stool and placed her binder and textbook in front of her on the table. Jennifer looked at Amanda with a blank expression for a moment and then a big smile crept onto her make up caked face. It was triple the amount that Amanda wore and Esme was right. Too much makeup on a young girl looked ridiculous and fake. However, that was Jennifer Beach. Amanda smiled back and complimented, "I like your lipstick. What kind is it?"

"It's from Sephora!" Jennifer stated proudly. Amanda's compliment warmed Jennifer a bit. She pointed to Amanda's face and asked, "What happened to your eye? Where you in a catfight?"

Amanda caught herself about to give a sarcastic response, but instead she laughed it off and shook her head, no. "Uh, no. A girl kicked me in the face at swim practice yesterday," she explained in a neutral tone.

"What a loser! I hope you kicked her back!" Jennifer responded loudly with a smug superiority. It was almost as if she knew it was Susie who had accidentally hit Amanda and she wanted to rub it in. Amanda could almost see Susie sink down in her seat in her peripheral vision. She felt her stomach twist in a knot. She forced herself to laugh, but it came out sounding a bit contrived and she hoped Susie didn't think she was laughing at her.

'_Surly Susie understands why I didn't sit next to her,'_ Amanda thought arrogantly, immediately gulping back the feeling of guilt as the class began. Jennifer passed her pink lipstick to Amanda as an offering. Amanda was 'in' if she wanted to be, but Amanda was not sure anymore if she wanted to be one of the 'popular' girls anymore. She took the lipstick and smiled at Jennifer and put some on her full lips and passed it back.

"It looks good on you," Jen said with a wink that made a shiver run down Amanda's spine. She really felt like a bad person at that moment. Perhaps Emmet had been right. She was an evil girl. Who would choose the path of lies and cattiness over sincerity and the possibility of true friendship? _'Am I a bad person?'_ Amanda wondered as she hid her face from Susie's view and she opened her text to the page the teacher instructed the class to read. She had only been joking with Alice earlier about being bad. It was all a joke until now when it came down to choosing who she wanted to associate with.

Amanda didn't like Jennifer and she didn't need to get to know the plastic girl to find that out. However, associating with the queen bee would make her climb the social ladder at school, something Amanda always thought she would enjoy. It was fun to be on the top and get the best of people. The only problem with being on the top of a pile was hurting those who were being crushed underneath. Susie reminded Amanda so much of her younger self when she was the outcast at school in Kipta. She had just become as bad as Stacey Peterson when she laughed at Susie. It was not as fun being part of the in crowd as Amanda imagined it would be.

Amanda wiped her lips roughly with the back of her hand and she picked up her books in haste. Jennifer watched her with glowering eyes as she stood up and slipped back one table and quietly sat on the stool next to Susie. Jennifer gave her the stink eye and then flipped her attention back to the front, giving Amanda the brush off. Amanda gulped and looked next to her at Susie who was wide eyed and confused at what had just happened. She smiled at the meek girl, who was dressed frumpy and didn't take care of her appearance.

"I think I made the wrong choice earlier. Is this seat taken?" Amanda whispered to Susie, who sat frozen for a long pause until she recovered from shock and nodded quickly. Amanda smiled faintly. Susie returned the gesture, her cheeks blushing deep red.

This was the right choice Alice had been talking about. The knot in Amanda's stomach loosened and she carried on with the day as someone who would have to fit somewhere in the pile between the top and the bottom. Amanda didn't plan on being held back by the Stacy's and the Jennifer's in her life anymore.

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_**Thank you for reading.**_

_Coming up next...Amanda rebels against accepting Liz as her 'mother'._

_If you don't want the preview for the next chapter you will have to let me know. All review responses will get one. :) If you have any questions feel free to ask me and I will do my best to answer._


	29. Ask Your Mother

_Note: Thank you to my betas! :) Oh, what a mess it is without your help! _

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**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Twenty-Nine**

|Ask Your Mother|

"Knock knock!" Alice sang out as she swung open the door of Amanda's bedroom and let herself in. Their first week of school had come and gone and it was Saturday morning. Amanda was attempting a sleep in. She had stayed up late the night before seeing as it was not a school night, but Alice didn't quite understand Amanda's need for sleep or Amanda's love for staying in bed longer on a weekend.

"No! Go away, Alice! I'm still sleeping!" Amanda belted out, her voice muffled by her blanket she was nestled into. She was in the prefect position in the center of the bed, her pillows and blankets were perfectly molded around her body and the temperature her body was made that certain spot toasty warm. She didn't want to move for fear of ruining her perfect sleep in.

"You _are so_ awake, you little fibber! How can you tell me to go away if you were actually sleeping?" Alice asked with perky enthusiasm, jumping up onto Amanda's bed and crawling over to her cousin excitably. Amanda kept her eyes closed and pretended she hadn't heard that. Alice leaned in and kissed Amanda's nose and then giggled when Amanda roughly pulled her blanket up over her face. "I miss you when you are sleeping. You know that! Come on! You've had a full eight hours, Mandi! Time to greet the day!" Alice chanted highly and pulled at Amanda's comforter to expose Amanda's curled up form. Amanda moaned and curled up even tighter.

"I will tell on you!" She threatened. It was a poor attempt at that. She and Alice had an understanding where they looked out for each other. What that really meant was that Alice never told on Amanda for little disobediences that she might commit. It rarely worked the other way around. Alice was an angel in her parent's eyes most of the time. Alice knew this was an empty threat and she balked at Amanda and then kissed her on the nose again. Amanda opened one eye to peek at Alice.

"You can't tell on me. I have done nothing wrong," Alice pointed out, "I knocked and everything!"

"Normally…" Amanda stated as she sat up and crossed her legs, her upper body slumped over as she rested her arms on her knees; "It is customary for the knocker to wait for the person inside the closed room to invite them in!"

"Oh, what a waste of daytime! It is no matter; I knew you would be happy to see me!" Alice sang. Amanda gave her a sarcastic glare. "Eventually, anyway," Alice continued, "And besides… it's Saturday and you know what that means!"

"Uh… I don't get to sleep in on my day off because I have an annoying, midget cousin with a big mouth?!" Amanda offered her sarcastic guess. Alice didn't take any offence and she hopped off the bed and pranced to Amanda's closet to get out the outfit that Amanda would have chosen to wear, making a few changes due to her own personal fashion preference. Amanda hardly ever minded Alice's help dressing. As long as she liked the clothing, she went along with Alice's game of playing dress up.

"Nope!" Alice peeped loudly, "It means… that it is allowance day and we are going shopping!"

Amanda didn't move. She stared at Alice without blinking until her lips pursed out and her eyes narrowed. Alice giggled again as she placed Amanda's clothing items neatly on the bed. Amanda rolled to the edge of the bed and slimed off of it onto the floor. It was cooler than she had anticipated, so she groaned and rolled herself up to standing and then she stumbled to the door in her groggy, morning state. Alice skipped along behind her.

"I want pancakes. Do you think Esme will make me pancakes?" Amanda asked dully as she slumped down the stairs, holding the railing for safety since her legs were still wobbly from being in bed all night.

"You're supposed to ask Liz, remember?" Alice reminded Amanda softly. Over the past week, Amanda was constantly being told by Esme and by Carlisle that they would be there for her, but Elizabeth was now in charge of all the major decisions when it came to Amanda's care. It was important for Amanda to get used to Elizabeth being her guardian and time for them to bond again over mother/daughter things.

"It's just pancakes, Alice! Yeesh!" Amanda ranted as she ungracefully swayed into the kitchen, "I don't care who makes them!" She was met with Esme and Elizabeth both standing by the table, looking at her questioningly. Carlisle was not home; he worked a half-day at his office on Saturdays and had taken Rosalie with him. Emmet and Jasper had left the night before on a hunting trip and said they wouldn't be back until the evening. Amanda stopped short, her hair tangled around her face and still clothed in her pajamas. "Uh… may I have pancakes for breakfast… please?" Amanda asked sweetly, looking from Esme to Elizabeth, not sure who to ask now.

"Of course, Amanda," Elizabeth said, gathering her confidence. Esme rubbed Elizabeth's shoulder and smiled as she left the room to give Amanda and Elizabeth some alone time. Alice sighed and pouted at her mother because she knew she would be asked to join her if she didn't leave as well. Elizabeth made her way behind the kitchen counter. "Since you asked so nicely," she added with a loving smile directed at her human daughter. Amanda forced a smile as she made her way over to the counter to take a seat on one of the bar stools. She yawned and rubbed her eyes as she crawled up on the stool.

"Will you put chocolate chips in them?" Amanda asked, hoping that Elizabeth might be less strict about sugar than the Cullens were. "Please?" She added for good measure.

"I don't think so, my dear," Elizabeth answered regretfully. She cracked the egg into the mixing bowl to add to the milk and oil. She reached for the blender and plugged the appliance into the wall.

"That's how you used to make them for me, remember?" Amanda pushed. "And they were the best!" Elizabeth caught onto Amanda's not so sly attempt to compliment her into adding chocolate and smirked. Amanda smiled back, knowing that her plan was working.

"Well, all right then." Elizabeth started the mixer and beat the egg into the milk and oil. Amanda beamed. Elizabeth turned off the mixer and began measuring out the flour. "Go to the pantry and bring me the bag of chocolate chips," Elizabeth instructed.

There was no delay in that request. When it came to Amanda getting her way she was more then cooperative to help out. She slid of the stool and ran to the pantry door and swung it open. She was too hasty and she knocked a jar of pickles off the shelf. It smashed around her feet.

"Oh, crap!" She gasped and bent down to pick up the mess.

"No wait!" Alice called as Amanda picked up the first shard of glass, slicing her index finger by accident. It was too late. Alice froze in front of the pantry door and her shoulders fell as Amanda broke skin.

"Ouch!" Amanda yelped and she pulled back her finger at that same moment. Then she realized what she had done and she cringed and wrapped her other hand around her finger tightly to hide the cut that was starting to seep a thin line of blood. "Sorry!" Amanda called out sheepishly, not moving in fear she might upset Elizabeth.

Alice backed away slowly, not for fear she would lose control, but she wanted to stick close to Elizabeth, who had run out of the kitchen and out the front door as soon as the scent of blood hit the air. "You can handle it, Mandi. Wrap it up in a tissue until it clots and then put a band-aid on it. Then put the bloodied tissues in a zip lock bag in the trash. We will step out for a while," Alice told her, "Be careful of where you step when you come out of there. Leave the rest of the mess for one of us to clean up later. Okay?"

Amanda nodded and hung her head. When she lifted it again, Alice had disappeared. Amanda rose from her crouched position and stepped over the glass, doing as Alice warned her so she would not cut her bare feet on any glass.

The kitchen was empty. Alice, Elizabeth and probably Esme as well, had run away because of a tiny cut. Amanda sighed and grabbed a tissue from the side counter and held onto it tightly. Alice and Esme could have probably stayed in the room if it was a small cut like it was. Yes, it would torture them, burn their throat with the pooling of venom, but they would not attack in a case like this. They had left to be with Elizabeth, as a precaution. Amanda sighed again and looked around the silent kitchen. The bowl of pancake batter was ready and the griddle was still on.

Suddenly, in light of the moment, pancakes were not so important. Amanda lost her interesting in a hot, home-cooked pancake meal.

She did as she was told to do. She cleaned up all the blood, bandaged her finger, and left the remainder of the glass on the floor for someone else to clean up. She then went to her room to get washed and dressed for the day, taking longer than necessary in a stall tactic to avoid seeing Elizabeth for as long as she could hold off. She was not quite sure what she would say to her. '_I'm sorry?'_ Amanda wondered as she finished doing her hair and makeup in the bathroom mirror. It hardly seemed fair that she should apologize for accidently cutting her finger, but she didn't know what else she would say.

Amanda sighed and looked at the clock on her nightstand when she exited her bathroom and stepped up onto the large trunk at the end of her bed. It was only nine in the morning. She spread her arms and let herself plummet to her bed that was magically made somehow. The sheets had all been pulled up and tucked in at the side, the comforter was covering the entire bed instead of being half on the ground, and all the fancy shams and throw cushions were neatly piled at the head of the bed over her favorite, body-length pillow. It must have been Esme's doing when she and Elizabeth had been downstairs in the kitchen together.

Her crash into the bed made the cushions bounce and a few tumbled to the floor. Amanda closed her eyes and hugged one of the shams closest to her. She felt so tired all of a sudden and with no one else in the house, because they were babysitting Elizabeth, her 'mother' for all intents and purposes, so she wouldn't get eaten. Amanda fell back asleep within a few minutes. She did so partly in defense so she would not have to think about how ridiculous it was that her blood was enough to quake the Cullen family's leisurely Saturday morning.

"Amanda?" A soft, questioning voice whispered as Amanda woke to the slouch beside her on the bed. A gentle hand rested on Amanda's back. Carlisle had arrived home from work and heard from Alice about what had gone on that morning. Alice had decided to let Amanda sleep after all; feeling badly that it was her fault the incident had happened. Carlisle reassured Alice that she was not to blame and decided he would be the one to pull Amanda out of her seclusion. "It is almost two in the afternoon," he uttered quietly as Amanda opened her eyes to look at him. "You must be hungry. Elizabeth is whipping up another batch of pancake batter right now. How about you wash up and come down for breakfast? Or, I suppose, it would be considered lunch at this time of day."

Okay," She responded sleepily. Amanda was a bit groggy from sleep, but she nodded. Carlisle was sitting next to her on the bed and he moved his hand from her back so she could roll over and sit up. He smiled lightly.

"Don't let what happened upset you, sweetheart. You did exactly what you were supposed to do in that sort of situation and I, for one, am very proud of you for handling it so well."

"I didn't do anything!" She stated and glared at him in disbelief. She could not understand why she was being praised. Carlisle smiled, tilting his head to one side.

"You didn't panic, you stayed put until everyone was out of the room, you bandaged your own wound and then disposed of the trash," He spoke encouragingly. Amanda was not impressed.

"I put a band aid on. Big frickin' deal!" She added sarcastically, looking away from her uncle, knowing he would not approve of her tone. She sighed heavily when he choose not to speak, she looked back at him and said, "I don't like being a burden." The comment made Carlisle's still heart ache. He put his hand on Amanda's shoulder and tried to comfort her.

"I know you must feel upset when little things like this are made into a bigger deal because of who we are, but your patience and understanding does not go unnoticed, Amanda. We are all grateful to have you in our family and in spite of the few challenges we face because of our lifestyle, we can't imagine living without you."

"Living?" Amanda asked with a sly smile cracking from the corner of her mouth and one eye brow raised as she eyed Carlisle. He smiled and then gave his customary chuckle before he stood up. He ruffled her hair a bit until she reached to knock his hand away, but he was too fast. He headed to the door.

"Come out of your room, Amanda. It is Saturday. You don't want to waste your day off in bed, do you?"

"Uh… maybe," Amanda said as she jumped down from her bed, not bothering to straighten it back out or replace the pillows that had been knocked on the floor. "I like to sleep," she informed her uncle as she passed by him and he shut her bedroom door.

"Yes, sleeping is a luxury I never appreciated as a human. It was only when I became immortal and no longer had the need to sleep that I realized how valuable the type of rest could be to the body and mind. Pity we can't partake in the activity anymore. I do suppose it is nice to have a quiet, safe place in the subconscious to escape to when the mind is mentally exhausted from thought," Carlisle rattled off thoughtfully as he followed Amanda down the wide staircase to the second level. Amanda rolled her eyes when she saw Alice at the bottom of the stairs waiting for her.

Alice giggled. "Nice speech, daddy," she told him. She reached out for Amanda and hauled her into the kitchen to an awaiting stool. "Let's try this again, shall we?"

"I put plenty of chocolate in them, Amanda," Elizabeth said lovingly, placing a plate of hot pancakes freckled with melting chocolate chips. Amanda smiled at the plate, trying to get over the morning's first attempt at making this meal.

"Thanks, Liz," Amanda mumbled, picking up a fork and stabbing the pile of cakes on her plate. Her eyes met her adopted mother's and she forced a small smile of gratitude. She was hoping that no one was going to bring up what happened this morning again, especially Elizabeth. There was nothing to say to each other. Neither could apologize. It had been an accident that Amanda cut her finger and Elizabeth could not help being tempted by the smell of blood. Alice tried to take the blame, but no one would stand for that either, so it was silently decided to not dwell on the incident.

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After Amanda was finished eating, Carlisle called the rest of the kids to join the family in the living room where Amanda and Rosalie were playing a not so arousing game of 'Old Maid' with Alice snickering along beside them. It made Rosalie annoyed because that meant that she would most likely end up losing the card game and being labeled an old maid. Rosalie was a bit jealous at times of Amanda and Alice's friendship. They tended to stick together most of the time, whereas she and Amanda had a more typical 'sister/cousin' relationship. They cared for each other and Amanda looked up to Rosalie as a role model of sorts, but they were not close friends.

"Ha HAA! Old maid!" Amanda yelled out, throwing down her last pair of matching cards and pointing at Rosalie gleefully. Rosalie stiffly held the 'Old Maid' card in her hand and narrowed her eyes at her sister and cousin as they high fived each other.

"I hardly think this proves anything. After all, I have Emmet," Rosalie pointed out haughty. She flicked the card down on the coffee table and stood up with her arms crossed angrily.

"Don't be a poor loser, Rose," Alice sang.

"Well, then don't be poor winners!" Rosalie retaliated. Amanda continued to laugh at Rosalie's displeasure.

Emmet and Jasper walked in – they had arrived home from their hunting trip a bit earlier than intended. Emmet had found a huge, irate black bear and woke it from its hibernation just to eat it. Jasper had been content to find some deer and a mountain lion along their journey. Amanda sniffed the air as they entered the room. They always smelled nice to her, but she noted the fresh smell of nature that wafted through the air. Emmet, never tactful, noticed Amanda's bandaged finger right away and pointed it out.

"Did the human have an accident?" He teased Amanda with a dimpled grin, "Glad to see you survived!"

"Emmet!" Esme scolded sternly. His face fell and he shrugged.

"What?" Emmet asked innocently. Esme gave him a warning look and wagged her finger at him to let him know he had better watch his mouth. "You are walking on thin ice already with what happened earlier this week. If you want to prolong your grounding one more week you just keep pushing buttons and I will donate your video games to little boys who are more mature than you and who would love all those brand new games to play!"

"Aw, mom…" Emmet whined, pouting.

"Just behave yourself. If that means staying away from Amanda then do that, but if I catch you taunting her one more time this weekend, my words will become actions, young man! Do I make myself clear?"

"Yes," Emmet mumbled, looking sheepish. Amanda stifled her amusement by covering her mouth with her hand. She knew gloating was wrong, but she had definitely got him good this time.

Carlisle stood and pulled his wallet from his back pocket and opened it. Rosalie's eyes lit up, but Alice was first at their father's side. He pulled out three, crisp twenty-dollar bills and one crisp five-dollar bill and placed it in Alice's awaiting hand. She bouncing up to kiss his cheek and he leaned down to let her.

"Thank you, daddy," she told him pleasantly. Carlisle nodded at her and handed Rosalie her sixty dollars and passed Jasper two twenties, a ten, and a five. Jasper bowed his head in gratitude, as Rosalie counted to make sure her full allowance was accounted for. She smiled shortly and stepped a back.

"Thank you, sir," Jasper said with his soft, southern accent. Carlisle ruffled his hair. Emmet stepped forward eagerly and held his hand out. It was almost twice the size of Carlisle's and Carlisle was not a tiny man by any means. He gave Emmet a fifty-dollar bill and a loonie from his other pocket that rattled with change.

"Woohoo! Thanks, pops!"

"You are all very welcome. Amanda?" Carlisle said, looking for Amanda, who was still sitting on the floor by the coffee table sorting the cards back into the deck. She sighed very mildly and pushed herself up until she was standing and she trudged over to her uncle unenthusiastically. He was not ruffled by her lack of cheer. He pulled out a handful of change and frowned a bit. He had intended on giving her a five and a coin, but he didn't have the correct change. "Hmm, it seems I am out of loonies. Oh, but I have three toonies!" He said, smiling when he spotted the correct amount of silver and gold coins and handed Amanda her six-dollar allowance. The coins click in her cupped hand. She stared at the three coins for a short moment.

"Er, thanks," she forced herself to say without sounding too unappreciative. Six dollars was better than nothing, though she wasn't so sure what she could purchase under that amount that she would find useful.

"Don't spend it all in once place, dear," Carlisle said with touch humor, hoping it would not upset Amanda. Alice giggled and Emmet and Rosalie burst out laughing. Amanda's face remained somber as she glared at her uncle and shoved her coins into her pocket.

"I'm not amused," she answered dully, but with the corners of her lips curling up a bit afterward. She had to admit, her allowance was laughable.

"I am!" Emmet blurted out, still chuckling merrily at Amanda's plight. He was not the brightest crayon in the box when it came to school either, but he had the advantage of repeating school so many times that the material was finally sticking and his grades were decent. Thus, he had a fairly good grade to allowance ratio. Amanda shot him a glare and Emmet shut his mouth. Esme was giving him the same look and he didn't want to push his luck.

"Let's go shopping!" Alice cheered, whipping out of the room and then back a few seconds later with her large Tod's bag that she had been gifted at Christmas and was so expensive that Amanda was scared to breathe on it. She had also picked up Amanda's coat and gloves and passed them to her.

"That sounds like fun. I want Amanda home for dinner at six so don't get carried away and forget the time," Elizabeth replied, opting to stay home. One almost-slip-up today made her leery of venturing out amongst the humans. Rosalie hurried out of the room to get her purse. Emmet seemed happy enough to go along as their chauffeur. He was eager to pick up a new video game too. Jasper frowned. He didn't enjoy shopping like his mate. He would often go with her to hold her bags, but seeing as she had other company he declined the outing. Carlisle also decided he would stay home with his wife

"Shotgun!" Amanda called out.

*

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Hours later, money spent on video games, clothing and other items, Amanda was getting bored. She had not found anything to buy with her sixteen dollars, six from her allowance that day and ten that she had in her piggybank. Emmet and Rosalie were still in the shoe store – Rosalie was deciding between the brown boots or the black boots and Emmet was trying to help her choose. Alice and Amanda were walking back to the meeting spot they had all decided on when they had separated. Alice smiled and just then Amanda lit up excitedly.

"Five bucks!" Amanda thrilled as she bent down to pick up a folded bill that someone had dropped. She looked around and didn't see anyone else around so she shoved it in her pocket. "Finders keepers!"

"Lucky you!" Alice cheered, but then her perky smile faded when she saw what Amanda was planning. "No, Mandi. You have to ask your mother first!" She watched as Amanda ignored her and carried on walking in the direction of the cheap, teen jewelry store called 'Claire's'. Alice followed and tugged on Amanda's arm.

"She is not my mother, Aly! She can't tell me what to do. It is my money and it is my body!" Amanda insisted, pointing to a pair of 17.99 sterling ear studs that was next to a sign that read 'Free ear piercing with purchase of earrings'.

"You still have to ask permission and besides… you know that mom told you no. Not until you're thirteen!" Alice said shrilly.

"Esme is not my mother. _Neither_ is Liz! I am doing this!"

"Be reasonable, Mandi. Any piercing that is free with cheap earrings is bad news!" Alice argued, trying to talk Amanda out of the decision she had made. Alice didn't like it. She was not sure, but she saw a few outcomes to this situation that would end badly. "You will only -,"

"I don't want to know what is going to happen, Aly. Just be my friend and hold my hand when they shoot the little earring gun through my ears," Amanda insisted, her mind made up. The lady behind the counter pulled out the silver studs Amanda had pointed to and she walked around to Amanda with a smile. Amanda greeted her and told her what she wanted, "Hi. I would like to get my ears pierced. It says that it is free if I buy the earrings…"

"Of course. No problem," the lady with about twenty of her own piercings said, "I just need your parent or guardian to sign for you."

"Oh," Amanda said, deflated.

Alice relaxed for a moment, seeing the future flicker in so many directions. It landed on the same sort of future; Amanda eventually getting caught in her deception.

"Daddy!" Amanda called out, waving her hand towards her.

Alice sighed when she saw Emmet coming over, a bit confused, but smiling. He was always up for anything and surly this intrigued him. Rosalie was tapping her watch and pointed to the doors from the other end of the long hallway, hinting that they had to leave to get home on time. Emmet reached Alice and Amanda and stood up tall, towering over the shop worker.

"This is my dad," Amanda announced.

"Uh, ya… I am her father," Emmet said in a deeper voice trying to seem mature and he wrapped his arm around her shoulders. "This is my baby girl!" Amanda's eyes were wide as saucers as she waited to see if the woman would take the bait. She seemed too intimidated by Emmet to do otherwise.

"I just need you to sign for me," Amanda told him, pleading with her eyes as she bit her lip. Emmet tilted his head and he smiled.

"But of course, sweetie-poo!" he cooed, grabbing the pen on the counter and signing where the lady was pointing. He dropped the pen back on the counter and put his arm around Amanda and bent down to kiss the top of her head. The woman looked quite startled by his presence and wanted to make the sale and pierce Amanda's ears so they would leave. It was closing time and Amanda was her last sale of the day. She took the money from Amanda and handed her back a few dollars of change and then patted her hand on the stool nearby.

"Hop up here, kid," she told Amanda. Alice was twitching nervously, looking to her sister for support, but Rosalie was standing with her arms folded across her chest, tapping her new booted foot on the tile floor impatiently from the other end of the mall, unaware as to what her family was doing in the jewelry store. She had done her shopping and didn't care about what the others were up to; she just wanted to get home.

A minute later, despite of Alice's warnings, Amanda had her ears pierced and a smile on her face. They left the store and made their way over to Rosalie. Emmet leaned down and whispered in Amanda's ear. "You owe me for that one," he told her. Amanda shook her head.

"If you tell anyone, even Rosalie, I will tell Esme about the time I caught you and Rose on her Italian table going at it!" Amanda threatened in a very low, soft voice. He gasped and looked from Amanda to his mate, but Rosalie had not overheard. She had been too absorbed in herself to care either. Emmet's mouth dropped open and he huffed past Amanda when he realized that he had to keep her secret. If Esme knew he and Rosalie had purposely messed around on her handmade, marble table, he would be grounded for months!

"You are an evil child," he muttered. Amanda didn't respond. She combed more of her hair over her shoulders, making sure that she didn't tuck any behind her ears. The studs were easy to hide that way. She hoped she could keep her ears hidden for a while. She had not really thought through how she would tell Carlisle, Esme and Elizabeth. They would not be pleased, that was certain. Amanda leaned back in the car seat and smiled. She would worry about telling them some other day.

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_She was doing so well--taking a compliment for handling a difficult situation and then not making a scene with her tiny allowance. So...what do you think of Amanda's prank? She is doing what my mother loves to chastise as 'deliberate disobedience'. Kind of a big no no! Can she keep her new purchase hidden from Esme and the others? Will Emmett and Alice keep her secret? That is coming up next chapter with some Rosalie fun added to it, since we have not heard from her in a while. :)_

_**Thanks for reading. **_


	30. Up a Creek

_**AN-** I have been told by a friend that this updated, but nothing showed up and I have to admit I am guilty. :S But let me explain: I did try to update on Friday, but ff was not responding (or so I thought) and I gave up, thinking it had not worked. I guess it was just running slow and I caused it to upload and delete right after, but it still posted. I am sorry if I confused anyone. :( Oops. _

_So here is the new chapter now. As soon as my beta sends me chapter 31 back, I will post...so there will be 2 updates this week as a thank you for being so patient with me. :) Thank you, Cheeky, for your help. And thank you, RandomSugarRush, for being my beta! _

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**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Thirty**

|Up a Creek|

'_Oh crap!'_ Amanda thought despairingly as she studied her red, puffy ear lobes in her bathroom mirror, Tuesday morning. Her newly pierced ears had gone unnoticed by her family members for the last few days because she had kept her hair down around her face while she was in their presence. Only Alice and Emmet were in on her deception, and not to their liking. Alice didn't want to tell on Amanda because they were best friends and Emmet dared not tell. Amanda held too many of his mischievous moments over _his_ head and he did not want to stir up confrontation over this. After all, he was in the wrong for posing as Amanda's father and signing the release form at the jewelry store.

'_Ouch!'_ Amanda hissed in silence, careful not to yelp out loud as she poked at her ears to dab more cleaning aid on them. She had been cleaning them with the free solution the lady at 'Claire's' had given her. Amanda tried to ignore the signs of an infection and passed it off as normal swelling from piercing a hole through her ear lobes. Deep down she knew that she needed to try a different cleaning method, but she didn't know what else to do and didn't want to ask for help. Her ears were getting worse each day and after swim practice the night before they had gotten even more irritated.

Amanda didn't have time to mull over her problem. She was aggravated to have this ordeal on top of the issue of hiding her ears from her family already. The job of keeping her ears hidden was a lot of work and the guilt she felt was eating away at her from the inside out, but she was determined not to get caught. She had to finish getting ready for the day so she let her hair back down and brushed it out. She put on some light pink lip-gloss and shoved her eyeliner and mascara in her backpack on her way out of her bedroom.

"Good morning, darling!" Esme announced Amanda's presence in the main floor common room. Amanda was running late so she smiled and walked past her biological grandmother and entered the kitchen where her adoptive mother was preparing her lunch for the day. Elizabeth would make two bags and fill them both with food for Amanda and Alice would take one in her bag to pass off as her own.

"Have a seat. I will pour you some cereal," Elizabeth offered lovingly. Amanda shook her head just as loud horn beeped from outside. Emmet was very patient in waiting for Amanda, as were Jasper and Alice, but Rosalie hated the attention that walking into a classroom late brought to her, so she was always furious when Amanda was dragging behind in the mornings.

"I don't have time for breakfast," Amanda said, taking the packed lunches and shoving one into her backpack and the other one in her hand. Elizabeth was about to insist since she knew that breakfast was an important start to Amanda's day, but there was another long beep blaring from outside. Elizabeth frowned in the general direction.

"Rosalie, she is on her way. Please stop with the horn!" She reprimanded strongly. Elizabeth was not one to discipline the Cullen kids. She found it hard enough being an authoritative figure for Amanda. Esme and Carlisle had given her their permission to chastise all the children if they were misbehaving. Elizabeth found it hard to step up and voice her role as one of the family elders. She felt so insignificant. Esme reassured her that feeling would subside soon. She had been the youngest member of the family until Elizabeth joined. She understood the pressure on Elizabeth since she had gone through the same testing period when she was a new vampire.

Carlisle was the family's patriarch. It was an unspoken assumption, but he was the one that everyone looked up to for making all the major family decisions and was respected highly. He was the leader, in a sense, though he never claimed to be. He never wanted to belittle his wife or Elizabeth in their roles as matriarchs, but since he was the eldest and the benefactor and creator of the Cullen Clan, his word always stood higher above the rest. However when it came to disciplining, Esme was most often in charge of dealing with the kids because Carlisle's calm, gentle scolding was often not enough.

"At least eat something on the way. Here! Take this!" Elizabeth insisted, grabbing a banana from the fruit bowl on the counter and walking around the island counter to give it to Amanda.

"I gotta go. Thanks!" Amanda answered quickly, snatching the banana from Elizabeth and running out of the room. Walls did not separate the kitchen and the upstairs family room and the living room was a large room on the far end that was entered through French glass doors. Amanda reached the stairs and then flew down them, her feet thumping rhythmically as she went. There was another short honk from outside and Elizabeth's face twisted in disbelief and annoyance.

"Rosalie Cullen!" Esme bellowed, walking over to the large floor length windows on the side of the house to get a better look at what her children were up to. Emmet's face was visible and he sported a cheeky grin.

"It wasn't me that time!" Rosalie called back, slapping Emmet on the arm playfully. He chuckled. Amanda reached the Jeep and Jasper pulled her up into the back seat and then shut the door behind her. The vehicle spun out of the driveway in a flash. Esme sighed and turned back to Elizabeth in the kitchen. Elizabeth smiled warmly as she wiped the counter down with a damp cloth. "Children. Always pushing the boundaries," Esme reconciled.

"Yes," Elizabeth responded with a light laugh, "that is how they learn, I suppose."

"I have heard that too," Esme stated softly as she made her way into the kitchen and sat down on the bar stool by the island. She rested her arms on the marble counter top and slouched into it, defeated and continued, "I just wonder if mine will ever learn."

Elizabeth smiled and put the dishrag down on the neck of the sink faucet. She walked over to Esme and embraced her in a hug. Esme didn't say a word, but she placed her hand on Elizabeth's arms that were wrapped around her shoulders and neck in a gesture that meant, 'thank you. I have got your back too!'

*

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*

"This is ridiculous, Mandi! Your ears are getting worse. They are disgustingly swollen and I can tell you already have a fever. You have to tell my dad or I will!" Alice nagged in a low whisper as the pair of them worked over a math handout together in class. Amanda glared at her best friend and her pencil lead snapped from the pressure against the desk.

"It will not go away unless you do something about it," Alice pressed softly.

Amanda shook her head. "I _am _doing something about it. I've cleaned them three times today. It is probably supposed to be red for a while. Just let it go already!" She replied shrilly, because she knew Alice was right and she was in denial. She felt anxiety over the whole thing, but was too stubborn to confess yet. She was going to try harder to keep her infection hidden from her family.

"I can't…" Alice said with a pause, "...your ears are going to have to be amputated if you don't go see a doctor soon!" Amanda raised a skeptical eyebrow at her cousin, who was clearly lying to try to persuade her to seek medical attention.

Amanda didn't want to go to her uncle for help. Carlisle was not an unreasonable man. He would not yell- that was a given. He was too serene and gentle to stoop to a level that expressed his feelings in a negative or hurtful way. He was always a gentleman. However, all these qualities were what bothered Amanda the most. He had this way of making her feel guilty just by making eye contact. That look was one that make her knees shaky and she was never sure why she felt that way around Dr Cullen.

"I don't need a doctor. They are just a bit red. It hardly hurts anymore," Amanda lied.

Alice sighed and reached to touch Amanda's ear gently to prove a point. Amanda flinched and slapped her cousin's hand away. Alice raised her eyebrows haughtily.

"Fine!" Amanda conceded, "It hurts a little, but I am not telling Carlisle. Or Esme or Liz!"

"But…" Alice tried to reason with her cousin in hopes to sway her into a better direction.

"That is final! And if you tell on me, I will never forgive you. EVER! Check the future if you'd like, but we both know how stubborn I can be! Call my bluff if you have to… you will lose!" Amanda told Alice strongly, but without vicious intent. She was serious. If Alice betrayed her trust it would crush her and ruin their friendship. Best friends were meant to stick by your side no matter what... and Amanda expected no less from Alice.

"You are making a mistake, though. I'm only trying to help so your punishment will be less," Alice argued, tying one more time to convince Amanda to give herself in to their parents and tell them about her ear piercings. "I love you," She added sweetly. Amanda smiled, knowing Alice meant well.

"It is my mistake to make, Alice. Give me one more day to see if they will get better on their own and if they don't I will go see the school nurse or something," Amanda whispered.

Their teacher was watching them suspiciously. The heavy conversation had not looked like math study at all. Alice nodded and tapped the paper to get them both back to work. Amanda sighed and waited for Alice to do the next problem as an example. Mathematics was not her best subject. She was glad to have Alice there to help her.

*

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*

The day whizzed by for Alice, but Amanda felt like it dragged on and on. She didn't say anything to Alice, but her ears were getting worse. They were not only hot to touch and swollen, but it seemed to be spreading to behind her ear and her neck. Amanda felt tired and her head was heavy from the mild fever she was now running. She knew that Alice had warned her and it was never good to argue with Alice, but Amanda was still not ready to give up.

Just as school ended for the day, Alice slipped up and gave Amanda incentive for another devious plan. "Dad won't be able to pick you up from swim practice today. He will be out on a house call until after five," she shared her latest vision with Amanda.

"Okay, so Rose will pick me up then?" Amanda asked, not yet seeing the advantage this gave her.

Alice nodded. "You should maybe miss swim practice if your ears are sore," she suggested.

Amanda cringed, but she knew Alice was right. "Ya," she agreed dully. Then it hit her! Amanda gasped and her face lit up.

Alice moaned an pushed her hands into her face.

"I have a plan!" Amanda shrieked, elated with her idea.

"No, no, no! Bad plan!" Alice warned. Amanda was still smiling! She shook her head and took Alice's hand as she slammed their locker shut.

"It is a genius plan and you know it! We will get Emmet to drop us off with Rose at work and when Carlisle leaves to go on the house call I can have Rose take a look at my ears!" Amanda thrilled. She thought her plan was pretty good. She would figure out the details of it on the way to the clinic, but she was sure Rosalie would want to play doctor. Rosalie knew a lot about medicine and was anxious to use her knowledge. Surely Amanda could tempt her into keeping this a secret from Carlisle.

"One problem!" Alice stated as they made there way through the crowded hallways of the middle school to get outside. "Rose is not a doctor! Dad is! You will get in so much trouble for this if you...and I am fairly sure you will… get caught!"

"Only fairly sure?!" Amanda exclaimed, somewhat ecstatically. That was music to her throbbing ears. Usually Alice knew the outcomes like they were set in stone. "That is great news!"

"No, it is not! There is, like, a one percent chance you will get away with this. Pretty much every outcome seems to end with grounding and generally suffering on your part. Less if you confess now. I strongly urge you to –"

"I want to try my plan. Are you coming with me or going home?" Amanda cut Alice off. They reached the front doors of the school and filed out into the cold, winter day. Amanda shivered and flipped her hair out and over her ears that had been tucked under her coat collar.

Alice sighed dramatically and zipped up her coat to blend in. "I am coming with you," she responded lowly, with a shake of the head. She did not approve, but she was Alice and she would see her friend through this ordeal. She was bound by the duties of being a best friend--and she took her role very seriously. Amanda was the best friend she had ever had.

"Great! Now… the story is that there is no swim practice today because the coaches are having a meeting. We are going to the clinic because you wanted to keep Rosalie company while Carlisle is out."

"Wait! Why do I want to keep her company?" Alice inquired, making sure she had her part of the story straight.

"You're Alice! Why do you do anything? Just roll with it!" Amanda said impatiently.

Alice giggled and decided that was a good enough plan as any. She didn't ask any more questions. They had to stop talking about it when they got to the end of the parking lot in case they ran into their siblings. They crossed the street and found Emmet's Jeep and stood by it to wait for everyone. The high school let out five minutes later than the middle school. When the others came, no one questioned the change of plans. Not even Rosalie, who was too preoccupied applying a fresh coat of lipstick to her luscious lips.

Amanda glanced at her face in the rear view mirror and wiped away some of the eyeliner she had on with her finger and a Kleenex. There was no sense pushing too many buttons today. She had to play low profile if she wanted to get past Carlisle.

*

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*

"I may be a little bit late on this call. Perhaps it is best if you call Emmet or your mother to have her pick you three up at five o'clock," Carlisle suggested to Rosalie, who was preparing to be on her own at the clinic for a few hours. There were no patients scheduled, but she was in charge of answering the phone, scheduling appointments, cleaning the office and exam rooms, filing completed patient files, and other secretarial duties. "So, if you would please make sure you lock the filing cabinets before you leave and turn on the answering machine and lock all th-,"

"Yes, dad!" Rosalie exclaimed hurriedly, having already heard a speech of what was expected of her when Carlisle was out of the office. "I know already_ and_ I have the list you typed out for me." She waved a pieced of paper with her instructions on them. "Not to mention...my memory does not suck! But... if it makes you feel better, I will make sure to check all the tasks off as I go!" Her expression was a mixture of sarcasm and annoyance.

"Alright, darling. I see you have everything in control. I trust you will do an excellent job while I am away," he told her kindly and kissed her forehead once. He hadn't meant to offend her. He sometimes forget her existence spanned over a century in length so she was more than competent to handle this type of responsibility. Although, sometimes she still behaved like a spoiled teenager so he repeated things to reassure himself more than anything. "If there is an emergency of any kind, you will call me, though."

"Yes, dad. I know!" Rosalie agreed with a forced smile as she handed her father his black leather bag and his coat. He took them, smiled in return, and headed to the door.

"Have a good afternoon, girls. Once you have done your homework, perhaps you could help Rosalie with her checklist of assigned tasks," Carlisle mentioned to Amanda and Alice with a wink as he glanced over his shoulder at Rosalie, whose eyes narrowed at his gentle teasing. Alice and Amanda were working like busy bees at the coffee table in the lobby as he made his way out the door. They both looked up, smiled pleasantly, and answered in sync.

"Yes, Sir," two angelic voices rang out.

Carlisle paused for a moment to study the pair of seemingly well-behaved girls. He thought they looked up to no good, but decided that his suspicions, based on appearance, were not justified and he carried on his way. The bell on the door tinkled in his absence.

There were a few seconds of stillness and silence between Alice and Amanda before they both hopped up and skipped over to Rosalie, who was neatly filing a stack of patient files behind the front desk. She stopped what she was doing and eyed them both suspiciously. "Okay! What do two you want? You've been acting like you're made of sugar since you got here and everyone knows you are not that pure. Especially you, Amanda!" Rosalie bluntly inquired.

Alice faced Amanda expectantly.

"I'm offended!" Amanda stated dramatically, "I'm here because you are my cousin and because I want to support your future career in medicine!" But she was not convincing enough in her effort to win her cousin's affection.

"Hah! Ya, right!" Rosalie retorted with a laugh. "Why are you here and what do you want? I have work to do!"

"Oh, fine," Amanda conceded. It was best to just get to the point. "But I do need your medical opinion, Rosie. You care about me, right? You said so the other day when I hurt my arm."

Alice scoffed at this comment, knowing the sham Amanda had pulled over everyone's eyes.

"I don't like this…" Rosalie replied warily. She was aware that Amanda only called her by her nickname when the she wanted something. _'Please don't ask me for birth control,_' she thought with a grimace. She didn't want to have _that_ chat with Amanda.

Amanda continued, "How much do you care about me, Rosie?"

"I don't know yet…" Rosalie answered cautiously, putting down the file folders she was holding. "What is going on? Are you alright?"

"Well, it is not a big deal or anything, but I need you to promise you will not tell your parents — or Liz — if I tell you."

"Amanda, what is going on? Are you sick? Or hurt?" Rosalie demanded, feeling genuine concern building up within her. "Tell me now or I will call dad back right away. You are starting to scare me. You better not be having se-"

"I'M NOT!" Amanda belted out; horrified Rosalie would even suggest such a thing. She knew better than to go too far with any boy. She was only twelve after all and boys, in her mind, were still considered to be 'stupid'! "Ew. No way!" Amanda scolded and slapped Rosalie's sleeve in disgust.

"Well, what do you expect me to think?" Rosalie responded, relieved that she had been wrong. She wanted Amanda to stay away from boys for as long as possible, just like her parents and Elizabeth hoped. "Just tell me what is wrong and then I will tell you if I can help you," she encouraged. Alice nudged Amanda lightly to speak up.

"Alright, well, you see… I'm fine, but I have tiny problem that I need you to look at and help me heal up before your parents or Liz find out about it," Amanda began. Rosalie shook her head, getting nervous about this plan of deceit. She didn't smell blood, but she knew that whatever the problem was, she should not be treating Amanda as a patient without her father there to supervise.

"You should really talk to dad. I am not allowed to see patients, Amanda. You know that! Not without his permission and his supervision," Rosalie said, feeling unsure about whether or not she wanted to help Amanda or not. She was curious and she did want to know what the problem was, but she didn't like the idea of going behind her father's back to do so. "What is the problem, then?" She asked again, too intrigued to let it go now.

"You promise you will help me and not tell on me?" Amanda coaxed. Rosalie sighed heavily and grabbed Amanda by the arm and hauled her into the back room where no one walking on the streets could see them if walking by. She stared Amanda in the eye and waited for Amanda to talk. Amanda felt that was all the promise she was going to get so she gulped and gingerly tucked her hair behind her ears with care not to bump them too much.

Rosalie's eyes widened and her mouth dropped. "Holy Hell, Amanda! What did you do?"

To Be Continued…

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_So, what did you think? How much do you love Rosalie's attitude? Can Amanda get away with this? Will Rosalie help her or turn her in? _

**Thank you for reading.**


	31. No Paddle

_RandomSugarRush beta-ed this chapter! Thanks a million! _

_Thank you to all readers who took the time to review. :) Like I promised...here is the next chapter right away because of your patience and understanding!_

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**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Thirty-One**

|No Paddle|

"Her ear piercings are infected!" Alice announced, trying to be helpful. Rosalie scoffed and rolled her eyes, annoyed with this reveal.

"No, really?" Rosalie quipped sarcastically.

"Oh, this is not the time for your sarcasm. Amanda wouldn't listen to me when I told her to see Dad… so instead of the infection healing and getting better with cleaning it is getting worse and spreading." Alice was the calm voice of explanation.

"Well, obviously!" Rosalie snapped at Alice, "I can see for myself what has happened! What the hell were you thinking, Amanda? You were told you had to wait until you were thirteen to have your ears pierced!" Rosalie hauled Amanda into one of the exam rooms and shoved her roughly up onto a table so she could get a better look. "When did you —Oh no, don't tell me? You did this at that junk jewelry store in the mall, didn't you? You're a moron!"

"I know! Okay! Stop yelling at me! Ow!" Amanda yelped when Rosalie felt her ears gently. Any pressure hurt them now. "Just help me, Rose. Make it go away. Please?"

"The infection is spreading. It looks like Cellulitis, but I am not one hundred percent sure since I AM NOT A DOCTOR!" Rosalie stated very loudly. Amanda cringed and folded her arms across her chest.

"So, she needs antibiotics, right?" Alice asked, "I see Amanda taking Dicloxacillin in pill form." Rosalie nodded as she reached for the sterile ear thermometer hanging on the wall and turned it on. Amanda let her place the tip in her ear canal and was careful not to move.

"Yes, that or Cephalexin, is another one that would work well, I think," Rosalie agreed with Alice and then the thermometer beeped and she removed it from Amanda's ear canal to read. "It seems like a mild infection at this point, though you do have a moderately high temperature at the moment. Does your head ache?"

"No… just my ears," Amanda lied. She had a headache most of the day, but she was not going to admit it.

Rosalie narrowed her eyes at Amanda, seeing the deceit. "We had better have Dad write you a prescription now so you can get started on antibiotic as soon as possible. If the Cellulitis spreads further and your fever worsens, you might need stronger antibiotics administered intravenously and I am sure that is something we all want to avoid."

"NO!" Amanda demanded. She did not want that at all, meaning she didn't want to see her uncle. Rosalie misunderstood her fear and thought Amanda was worried about her condition.

"Well, don't worry, Amanda. It is not to that stage yet." As she spoke calmly, Rosalie took off the plastic covering that was on the end of the thermometer and tossed it in the garbage bin beside the table and she put another one back on and placed the tool on its base on the wall. "I am sure Dad will give you oral antibiotics. No needles involved." Rosalie said strongly, but with a level of caring in her beautiful voice. Amanda shook her head roughly. She stopped doing that immediately when it made her dizzy.

"No. I mean that I don't want you to call Carlisle," Amanda explained. Alice threw her hands into her face and she moaned. Rosalie was confused.

"Amanda. We have no choice. Trust me. I may not be licensed to practice medicine legally yet, but I have been studying it for decades! You need the antibiotics to clear this up. Cleaning with hydrogen peroxide or sea salt is not an option anymore. Not even a topical cream from over the counter will clear this, I am afraid to say."

"Can't you get me the medicine I need?" Amanda inquired, flashing her baby blues tearfully at her cousin's genuinely helpful and concerned face. "You can write me a prescription. You have the same last name as Carlisle anyway and we both know you are just as smart as he is."

Rosalie straightened up and looked at her sister. "Is she serious?" she asked Alice, incredulously.

"Yep," Alice replied right away.

Rosalie looked back at Amanda in shock. "Are you insane?" she asked her younger cousin in a shrill voice. Alice nodded.

"No!" Amanda defended herself surly, "Come on, Rosalie! You know how your parents are. They don't understand what it is like to be a young girl in this time period! They are too strict and it is not always fair!"

"They are not _that_ strict, Mandi," Alice reminded her gently. Amanda glared at Alice for interfering. Amanda focused back on Rosalie and tried her best to talk her into helping her without getting the parents involved.

"I just wanted to look pretty, Rosie," Amanda said using her sweetest voice. She rarely called her cousin by that nickname anymore. "It is like the make up and the high heels and stuff that they won't let me wear. I just wanted to be able to wear jewelry like you and Alice so I can be prettier."

"You are gorgeous, Mandi!" Alice sincerely stated. "Like Jasper said, you don't need all the extras!"

"But I do. And Rose knows it!" Amanda said firmly, not taking her eyes off Rosalie as she spoke. Rosalie did understand vanity better than anyone else. She was the one who always pushed Amanda to groom her hair and nails appropriately and showed her how to apply make up properly. She empathized with Amanda a little bit in this case. She could see why Amanda would want to fit in at school. Fitting in was something that Rosalie had always struggled with even though she was the most beautiful creature that most people would ever encounter in a lifetime.

"Please, Rosie? You know how to get me the pills, don't you? I promise I will do what you tell me and I will keep all your secrets and clean your room for you and I will-" Amanda begged.

"Stop!" Rosalie cut Amanda short. Amanda did as she was told. Alice watched Rosalie carefully to see what would happen. Then she closed her eyes and dropped her head. "I will help you," Rosalie continued slowly.

"Yes!"

"Not so fast!" Rosalie demanded. Amanda shut her mouth and tamed her gratitude. "I could get in a lot of trouble because of this, but I will do this one HUGE — and this is huge, Amanda — FAVOR for you! However, you are to never do anything this stupid and keep it hidden for this long again! Do you hear me?"

"Uh huh!" Amanda agreed, bobbing her head up and down a few times until it hurt her throbbing head. Rosalie grabbed a few things from the cabinet. A bowl, some saline and a big, empty syringe that made Amanda's eye bulge at first sight, but then she saw it had no needle tip. It was just for flushing out wounds.

"Good. Now! I need to remove those studs and flush the earlobes in some saline to clean them, so turn your head and stay still," Rosalie ordered, placing the equipment on the table next to Amanda.

"Remove them?" Amanda blared, unwilling to give up her jeweled ears quite yet, in spite of the trauma they had caused already.

"Sorry, but your body is fighting the infection; it does not need a foreign object in the way to contend with as well. You can't keep them in," Rosalie said in a surprisingly compassionate tone of voice that told Amanda she meant well. Amanda gave in and nodded, tilting her head to the left first so Rosalie could do her job. Alice held her hand so Amanda could squeeze it when Rosalie was touching her ears. "I know it hurts, but I will try to be gentle and do this as quickly as possible," she whispered to Amanda as she worked.

When the earrings were out and Amanda's ears were cleaned, Rosalie tossed the tools into the basin and unsnapped her gloves she had put on and threw them in the trash bin. "You owe me so much for this," Rosalie said as she turned from Amanda and walked out of the room. Amanda took that as a cue to get off the exam table and follow her cousin. "Hold up!" Rosalie said making Amanda stop in her tracks. "Clean up the table and put on a fresh sheet of tissue paper. I already tidied that room before you came!"

Amanda sighed in relief and did as she was told; thankful Rosalie was going to help her out in her deceitful plan. She cleaned up the exam room, recalling what to do from her experience working for Dr Cullen when she first met him in Kipta that day when she ran Elizabeth's car through his practice window. How strange it was that less than four years ago she had not known she would become a part of Elizabeth's and/or Carlisle's family? Amanda thought about this while Rosalie forged her father's name and an order for Dicloxacillin on a prescription pad. Rosalie then faxed the prescription for Amanda's antibiotics to the pharmacy.

In one hour, Rosalie took Amanda to the pharmacy and paid to pick up Amanda's prescription. The pharmacist knew Rosalie was working for her father and he also knew of Dr Cullen's niece so he assumed the note that was sent along with the prescription was really from Dr Cullen himself, allowing for his daughter to pick up the antibiotics in his favor.

The plan had gone off without a hitch and Rosalie gave Amanda her first dose of the drug and slipped the bottle of pills into her purse for safekeeping. Alice had finished the cleaning at the practice and there had been no calls to take that afternoon so all the work was done when Esme came to pick up the girls at five o'clock. She suspected nothing and Amanda sat triumphantly in the back seat, amazed at how well she had pulled everything off with the help of her cousins.

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After dinner, Amanda was still feeling poorly. Her head ached and she was very tired, but she couldn't show her discomfort because Esme and/or Elizabeth would worry and summon Carlisle. That would not be helpful. She had accomplished her goal of not getting caught in her deception. In a few days the antibiotics would clear up the infection and reduce the swelling and redness, Rosalie had informed her. Amanda had to keep her ears hidden for just a few more days.

"Amanda!" Alice whispered hoarsely as she flew into the TV room where Amanda was watching 'Friends' with Rosalie. The boys were playing Risk in the upstairs living room. Alice didn't want to say her warning out loud, for her mother and Elizabeth were in the next room and might hear so she held up a piece of paper that read, 'Dad knows! He will be home soon!'

Amanda's heart sped up and she leaned up from her lazy slouch and threw her face into her hands. Rosalie hissed and turned off the TV. "How?" She asked Alice. Alice was about to replied when they all heard a car driving up. It came to a noisy stop on the driveway instead of beside the house in the garage. If Alice's face could speak it would say_, 'Oh Crap!_' Rosalie cringed at the sound of her father's fast footsteps at they came up the front steps of the house and the front door opened letting in a draft.

"Rosalie and Amanda!" Carlisle called out the two names he had been given when he unexpectedly ran into George Bart in the Safeway only fifteen minutes ago.

George Bart was the pharmacist who had filled Amanda's prescription and who was, like Dr Cullen, also buying a few items from the grocery after work. Carlisle was picking up a carton of eggs because Esme wanted to cook Amanda an omelet in the morning and they were out of eggs.

"Both of you are to report to my office immediately," Carlisle demanded sternly as he placed his bag down on the front writing desk and took off his coat.

Esme floated to his side and put his coat on a hanger for him and placed the hanger in the coat closet. "Dear? Is everything alright?" she asked him.

"I am not sure. It seems that our niece needed antibiotics and our daughter has written a prescription and forged my name to obtain them. All without my better knowledge," he told Esme with dull, sad eyes. Esme was floored. She couldn't believe Rosalie would do such a thing. Carlisle was not in a loving mood. He normally kissed his wife as soon as he arrived home, but she stood out of his way so he could go up to his study to find out what was going on with the girls.

Rosalie was frozen in her spot at the couch. Amanda looked at her cousin so she could follow her lead. She didn't want to go up to Carlisle's study by herself. Even though it was she who had talked Rosalie into helping her, the whole thing was her fault in the first place.

"You'd better get going. He is up there waiting," Alice told her sister and Amanda. It was true. It had not been more than a minute since Carlisle had arrived home, but he was upstairs in his office, waiting for the girls to join him as he requested. He sat in his brown, leather, high-backed chair behind his thick mahogany desk… waiting.

Amanda finally stood up, wobbling a bit because her balance was off. She waited for Rosalie to get up too. Rosalie glowered back at her and finally got up abruptly and brushed past Amanda in a huff.

"You had better not let me take all the blame for this!" Rosalie sneered as she stormed ahead of Amanda towards the stairs. Amanda gulped and nodded a bit. She didn't like being in trouble, but it was far worse to have Rosalie upset with her. When they got upstairs, Rosalie opened the door to Carlisle's study and pushed Amanda inside hastily. Amanda stumbled a bit from the force and then came to a full stop.

Carlisle sat so perfectly still in his chair, not speaking. He didn't take his eyes off the two girls for a moment or so and Amanda's heart sped up nervously. Carlisle raised his hand to gesture that the girls come forward towards his desk. Amanda inched forward slowly.

"I ran into George Bart at the store today after work. He sends you his well wishes, Amanda. Care to explain to me — your doctor, as it reads on the prescription — why you are taking antibiotics to cure a bacterial infection?" Carlisle insisted, his voice calm, but the tone was a lot more urgent than its usual, peaceful lull. "I can't recall treating you for any such malady and I certainly do not remember faxing a prescription to the pharmacy for Dicloxacillin, but George Bart was very sure he had a visit from my gorgeous, blonde daughter and my stunning niece today."

"Well…" Amanda began, her voice cracked. She looked at her hands, which she held tightly together in front of her waist. She was barely audible as she confessed. Rosalie had to bite her tongue so she would not yell at Amanda to speak up. "I kinda went… and got my… ears pierced the other day," Amanda managed to say. Carlisle remained calm and raised his eyebrows and waited for her to continue. "And… my ears got sore and red, but I thought that was supposed to happen until Alice told me that they were infected and that I needed medicine to make them better."

"Alice knew about this?" Carlisle inquired rhetorically. Rosalie rolled her eyes. Of course Alice was in the know. She was the family know-it-all. Amanda looked up at Carlisle for the first time with pleading eyes, hoping he would not be upset with Alice.

"I made her promise not to tell. It is not her fault."

"Alice will be dealt with later," Carlisle said firmly. He sat up in his chair and leaned forward, reached for Amanda to come to him. She did so, until she stood right in front of him. He pushed back her hair to reveal her red, swollen ears. Amanda sighed and bit her bottom lip. "It looks like-"

"Cellulitis," Rosalie interrupted. Carlisle turned his eyes to meet his daughters. He was not impressed with her diagnostic skills at this time.

"Yes. Correct. I wish I could be proud of you right now, but I cannot," he told her. Rosalie felt that like a stab to her unbeating heart. She wanted so much to please him. All she could do was stand there and watch as he examined Amanda.

He gently probed the glands in her neck to make sure the infection was not causing too much swelling. Amanda winced a bit at his cold touch, but dared not move or say anything in complaint. The fact that he was not acting more upset was both a blessing and a punishment. The quiet, calm way he studied her with disappointment so clearly visible in his expression and tone of voice was enough to make her stomach rise to her throat.

"What you did, Rosalie... was incredibly irresponsible and it shows that you are not yet ready to work with me," he suddenly said as he faced his daughter again.

"What?" Rosalie was stunned. "I—" Rosalie began.

"Not only were you treating Amanda illegally without consulting me… you forged my name. I could lose my medical license if word got out that I had been so irresponsible."

"I didn't know — I mean — I didn't mean to-" Rosalie stumbled on her words.

"You didn't think, Rose. I am deeply concerned that you felt like you had to go behind my back and hide this from me. What did you think I would do to Amanda? Surely you know me better than to think she would not receive proper care. Did you think she would be punished too harshly? No matter what your reasoning was, you have disappointed me today. You are suspended from your duties at the Clinic until further notice. You will return home from school with the rest of your siblings from now on."

"But… I…" Rosalie protested.

"I will reevaluate this situation in a few weeks and if you can prove you have learned a lesson from this then I will be happy to have you rejoin the practice as my assistant at that time," he told his daughter patiently. "Until then, I am afraid I can no longer trust you. I would like the Dicloxacillin, please. I will be taking over Amanda's patient care from this point on." Rosalie felt enraged, but kept it to herself as she reached into her purse and pulled out the bottle of pills and handed it to her father.

"It was my fault!" Amanda blurted out, feeling horrible that Rosalie was getting into so much trouble over her plan. "I made her do it!"

"You did not make her do anything. Rosalie has a mind of her own. If she let you persuade her into this, then that was bad judgment on her part. It was her decision to get involved in one of your shenanigans," Carlisle said firmly. Amanda was still standing within his reach and didn't move away yet because she had not been told to do so and she was suddenly feeling very small. "Rosalie, that is all. You may go to your room now. You are not grounded at this time since Amanda is taking full blame, but you are to stay in your room until morning as punishment. Think about what you have done and what you would do differently if you could do it over. Your mother and I will be up to see you later to discuss your insights on your behavior later this evening."

"I can't believe this!" Rosalie huffed and she flipped around and stormed out of the room, closing the door loudly. Amanda flinched at the sound.

"Now," Carlisle continued to speak. Amanda waited for her speech. "I am not quite sure what to say to you, Amanda. I am very disappointed in your behavior, as well."

"I'm sorry," Amanda slipped, her guilt too much for her to bear anymore. Carlisle could tell she felt badly and her apology was sincere, but he was not ready to accept it yet and tell her that everything was forgiven.

"I am glad you understand your wrong doing and you are sorry, but you disobeyed us. For that you will be punished. It was Esme's rule that you could not have your ears pierced until your thirteenth year and you blatantly disregarded her orders. Not only did you disobey her, but also you lied when you choose to keep it a secret from us. Worse than that even… is when you were hurt, you didn't confess right away and ask for help. You continued to go behind our backs to cover this up!"

"I didn't know that all this would happen. I just wanted to wear earrings and I just…"

"You just did what you wanted and didn't think about the possible consequences," Carlisle told her in a stern voice. "It was selfish and childish of you. The rules that we set for you are for your own good. I know you think we are hard on you — that you have a rough life living with us — but I can assure you, Amanda, you are very lucky to have so many people who care about you enough to set rules to keep you safe! What you did — keeping this a secret when you were showing signs of infection — was extremely dangerous. Cellulitis can become life threatening if left untreated. You got lucky that Rosalie caught it before you became seriously ill. I do not want anything like this to happen again. Do you understand me?" Amanda nodded quickly; alarmed at the faster pace his words were taking. He almost sounded angry. "I am going to accept your apology now, but you are still going to have to earn some of your privileges back."

Amanda nodded again, feeling overwhelmed and almost ready to cry, but she was stubborn enough to try to hold back her tears. She didn't want to show weakness, though she was so tired and her head hurt terribly. He eyes felt itchy from keeping them open when she so badly needed rest.

"You will need to miss a week of swim practice to allow for your ears to heal properly, but you will miss two weeks as that is the length of time you will be grounded for," Carlisle laid down the punishment guidelines.

Amanda opened her mouth to protest, a habit she had when being told she could not do something she loved. Swimming was her favorite activity and it stung a bit to think about missing two weeks of practice. Carlisle had stopped speaking when she opened her mouth, but she closed it again so he could continue. "No television, no video games, and no computer for those two weeks. You will go to school and come home right away to do your homework. When that is complete you will help with any chores your mother or Esme have planned for you. In the evenings with your spare time you will be free to read or spend time with your cousins, so long as the activities fit within the structure of your grounding. Do you understand?"

"Yes," Amanda answered softly, her voice cracking again as all the guilt and humiliation finally hit her. She was overly emotional from being sick too, but the tears that were prickling her eyes and making her face heat up were mostly because she was feeling sorry for herself and sorry in general for messing up so badly. "I'm sorry," she squeaked, unable to look her uncle in the eye when she spoke. Carlisle could see she was not well and since she had sincerely apologized he took her into his arms and hugged her. She was a twelve-year-old girl, after all. He didn't want to be too hard on her for making a mistake.

"Hush now. You are forgiven. Don't cry, Sweetheart. What is done is done. You made a mistake, yes, but you are going to do the time and learn from this incident," he told her, rubbing her back smoothly. Amanda usually resented his attempts to show her affection, but she was so relived to not be keeping the secret anymore and to learn that Carlisle was not angry with her so she let him hold her. When she stifled her tears she pushed back from him and wiped her face with the back of her hand.

"Can I go to bed now?" she asked meekly, her face so obviously exhausted from the long day. Carlisle nodded and released her from his grasp.

"Yes. That is a good idea. You can go up and get ready for bed and I will bring up a glass of water and your pill, alright?" he agreed kindly. Amanda gulped back a lump in her throat and nodded. She walked away and did as she was told. Carlisle sighed and put his hand through his hair.

Esme peeked in the door a minute later and smiled at her husband. She was the one in charge of disciplining the children most of the time, but she was glad that he spoke to Rosalie and suspended her from work. The punishment was more affective if the parent wronged does the speaking. Esme would have to confront Amanda for deliberately disobeying her rule when the time was right, but Esme had heard the punishment Carlisle had assigned her and felt it was just.

"How are you holding up?" she asked her husband as he got up to meet her at the doorway. He smiled gently and reached for his wife. She held onto him tightly and nestled into his chest.

"I hope I was not too hard on them, but when it comes to her health I feel I have the right to chastise Amanda when carelessness has caused her to suffer in vain," he ranted lightly, trying to assure himself that he had done the right thing by punishing Amanda for her actions over the last few days.

"You were right. I think you handled that extremely well. Elizabeth was furious when she first heard of the stunt Amanda pulled. She thought it was best she not confront Amanda just yet so I encouraged her to let you handle the situation. Jasper took her out of the house for a while to help her calm down. She sends her gratitude to you for dealing with Amanda this evening," Esme told Carlisle.

"It is no problem at all. I think of Amanda as one of my own," Carlisle admitted. Esme grinned and looked up at her husband adoringly. She was blessed to have him in her life, to have accepted Amanda into theirs so willingly, so lovingly. She rose up on her tippy toes and kissed him softly and gratefully. He kissed her back.

"I have to go up and see to it that Amanda takes her medication," he said after he regretfully pulled away from Esme's smooth, hard lips. "Are you going to deal with Alice or should I?"

"I will handle Alice, darling," Esme answered. Carlisle kissed her one more time on the lips to show his love and gratitude. Downstairs, where she had kept a low profile while her sister and cousin got their punishments doled out, Alice cringed. It was her turn to be chastised. A parents' work was never done.

* * *

_**How do you like Carlisle now that he brought the hammer down?** Hehehe...or in his case... the squishy foam bat since he doesn't approve of violence. **Do you think he punished them fairly?**_

_Coming up next: Rosalie holds a grudge, Emmett finds Amanda in an awkward situation, and the drama continues...._

_If you'd like a preview, let me know. :)  
_

**_Thank you for reading. _**


	32. Crawl Under a Rock

_Thank you to all who have read this far....for your patience with me. I do have some things coming up a few chapters down the road that are more dramatic that will lead eventually to an ending I have planned, but it all takes time and I don't like to rush it. :) I hope the fluff and angst in between is enjoyable for the time being. _

_Thank you to my beta, RandomSugarRush. I would be lost without you. :)_

* * *

**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Thirty-Two**

|Crawl Under a Rock|

A week had passed by and Amanda's ears had healed nicely. She had only one more dose of antibiotics left to take and she would be finished, though her infection was completely cleared up already. She was still upset that she was grounded, but Amanda had made peace with it since she had made a very bad choice and got caught doing so. Everyone, for the most part, had forgiven her and had moved on from the incident.

Elizabeth had been very upset with Amanda at first, but they had a chat and Amanda was let off the hook with only the grounding that Carlisle had given her. Esme played good cop on this occasion and decided not to harp on Amanda about the deception and, instead, she lovingly catered to Amanda for a few days while she was not feeling well. Amanda felt so guilty she apologized to Esme without any persistence from anyone.

Emmet was elated that Amanda failed to mention he had been involved. In fact, the topic never came up. Alice had been in a little bit of trouble for her negligence, but she went unpunished because she honestly tried to do the right thing. She confessed right away when her mother came to talk with her about what she had done wrong in this instance. Esme knew Alice always had good intentions, but sometimes Alice was not sure where the line between doing what is right and doing what your best friend wishes lies. Mother and daughter had a long discussion about this and Alice promised she would try harder to do the right thing next time.

Rosalie was not as compliant as her little sister. She stubbornly refused to see her wrong in the situation. Her denial of any wrongdoing only worked against her. She was already suspended from working with her father for an unknown probation period, but Esme felt that her daughter's wayward attitude earned her more punishment at home as well. She placed Rosalie on garbage and recycling duty for two weeks time, which was torture to a girl who doesn't like the get her hands dirty.

Rosalie was bitter and unforgiving towards Amanda, who she blamed for the whole ordeal.

Amanda knew that it was all her doing and she had been trying to get Rosalie to forgive all week. She ungracefully inched her way towards Rosalie one evening with a hopeful smile on her apologetic face. She had even went as far to collect her garbage and take it out back to the bin so Rosalie wouldn't have to do it later.

"I… like your robe thingy, Rosie," Amanda said sweetly, not sure what to call the elaborate fur, dressing robe Rosalie had on. Her voice was so high-pitched and squeaky that it gave her desperation away. She had been trying to make conversation with her cousin for days. Rosalie, who was propped up royally on a chair by the window in the living room off the kitchen, stiffened, but never looked up from her book. Amanda bit her lip and waited for a few desperate seconds, but then she sighed and backed up from her spot beside Rosalie.

"Aw, come on, Rose baby," Emmet encouraged his mate as Amanda sulkily retreated out of the living room back into the kitchen. "She's just a kid. She gets me into trouble all the time and she does it on purpose. She actually feels badly that you got punished." Emmet's voice trailed into the kitchen with Amanda as she pulled out a chair at the table in front of her laid out books and notepaper.

"I don't want to discuss this matter anymore!" Rosalie fired back at Emmet. Amanda winced a bit and looked down at her homework, avoiding the watchful eyes of her mother and her aunt. Emmet strolled by Amanda, patting her on the back gently with his huge hand. Amanda lurched forward from the brunt force, but it didn't hurt. When she turned around, Rosalie was gone from her seat by the window.

Elizabeth finished cleaning the counters and then pulled a tray of cookies from the oven. She smiled to herself as she did so without using any protection against the hot steel. Esme helped Elizabeth by taking the tray from her. "Just give her some space, my darling," Elizabeth said, suddenly she was by Amanda's side stroking the girl's long, honey colored hair. "You have apologized to your cousin. It is time to let her heal now. Okay?"

"Ya," Amanda mumbled softly. She was tired from a long day of school and the penicillin therapy drug she was on often made her feel lethargic and a bit queasy.

Esme sighed, thinking about her stubborn, blonde daughter. The truth of the matter was that Amanda and Rosalie were both very similar in attitude at times. Both girls had trouble adjusting to change and accepting new people into their lives. When confronted with something they did not approve of, they both were impulsive and had hot tempers. It was no wonder that the pair of blondes had a hard time getting along at times.

"I made you some cookies!" Elizabeth beamed lovingly, trying to cheer Amanda up. "How would you like some of them with a cup of hot chocolate while you do your homework?" she offered enthusiastically. Normally, that was a treat reserved for a cold day, but the weather in Port Alberni in mid January was not as harsh as the cold winter days spent in Alaska. Amanda had not had hot chocolate since the move back to Canada. Sadly, she was in no mood to indulge herself with melted chocolate in a cup.

"No, thank you. Not right now," Amanda refused politely. Elizabeth lifted Amanda's chin up and studied her face. The garage door noise was barely audible to Amanda's ears, but it meant that Carlisle was now home from work. Elizabeth glanced at Esme for an opinion that she didn't voice out loud. Esme hummed and looked to the stairway where she expected to see her husband at any moment. He appeared with a smile and kissed his wife excitedly, pleased to see her after being parted for the day.

Elizabeth smiled to see them so happy. Carlisle noticed her hovering over Amanda. "Is everything alright, ladies?" he asked helpfully.

"I'm not sure. Amanda just refused cookies and hot chocolate," Elizabeth told him with a hint of amusement in her tone, though she was concerned at Amanda's lack of interest in the sugary treats. She glanced back down at her daughter and stroked the hair from Amanda's face and behind her ears. "It is not like you to turn do anything chocolate, sweetie," she said.

Amanda was too tired and too upset that Rosalie still was not speaking to her that she didn't bother to scowl at Elizabeth's overly concerned demeanor.

"How is her temperature? Does she feel very warm?" Carlisle asked, looking to his wife for her approval to leave her side. Esme didn't mind giving him up for a good cause so she let go of his waist.

Elizabeth tried to answer Carlisle's question by feeling Amanda's forehead lightly, but she shrugged and pursed her lips. Amanda frowned, but didn't bother to fuss, which only made the adults more certain that she was not her usual self. Elizabeth's icy touch left her head then. "She feels warm," Elizabeth answered Carlisle and then continued to say, "but then again… she always feels that way to me now," with a little chuckle.

Carlisle stepped up with a smile and a nod. He took her place, cupping his hand over Amanda's forehead and then he used the back of his hand to feel her cheek. He was thoughtful as he shook his head. "Her fever doesn't appear to have returned," he told Elizabeth.

"I'm fine. I just don't feel like cookies and hot chocolate right now," Amanda uttered dully, but there was in underlying edge to her voice that suggested she was irritable and needed some time to herself.

"You barely touched your dinner tonight either, Amanda. Are you sure you are feeling well? You need to speak up when something is bothering you," Esme reminded. Amanda sighed and looked at her pencil as she taped the eraser end on her math notebook.

"I'm tired...and I have a lot of homework to do. So…" she hinted, poking at her paper firmly with her pencil.

Elizabeth shared a concerned look with Esme, who was reassured that Amanda was fine because Carlisle didn't seem to be alarmed by the girl's lack of enthusiasm over sweets. Esme smiled at Elizabeth and motioned with her head towards the door to suggest they leave Amanda alone to do her work. Carlisle kissed Esme one last time before she and Elizabeth exited the room.

Amanda began scribbling away at her notebook again, so Carlisle decided to go check on his other kids and leave Amanda be for the time being. She obviously was having a bad day and need some space.

*

*

*

"Hey, Pops!" Emmet cheerfully welcomed his father home when Carlisle joined him in the downstairs TV room. Elizabeth had taken Alice and Jasper up on the opportunity to join them for a hunting trip while Esme eventually found her way back into the kitchen to help Amanda with her math homework. The family was aware of the conflict that Rosalie and Amanda were having, but didn't know the details or extent of the grudge that was being held. Esme thought it was a good idea to have Carlisle check in on the feud. She encouraged him to seek out their oldest boy, knowing the truth could be found with Emmet.

"Good evening, Son," Carlisle greeted his son properly.

Emmet finished destroying a villain on his video game and then paused it to see if his dad needed anything, since he seemed to be lingering. "What can I do for you?"

"I'm just checking in. How was your day at school?"

"It was school. You know… same ol'!" Emmet answered merrily. Carlisle chuckled at how easy-going his large, playful lug of a son was. It was refreshing to witness. "How was work? Did any humans expire on you today?" Emmet asked. Carlisle's smile softened, but didn't disappear fully. Emmet was also tactless. This was both endearing, but at times, inappropriate.

"No, not today, thankfully," Carlisle replied seriously. Emmet's dimples were up to his eyes practically as he smiled and nodded vigorously.

"That's good, I suppose. Dead people smell funny!" He said making a face of disgust. Carlisle closed his eyes and brushed his hand through his golden hair. He sighed and decided to end the small chat since it was not going as well as he had hoped for.

"I actually came to see you about something else as well, Emmet," he told his son patiently, taking a seat on the edge of the sofa armrest.

Emmet looked to the TV screen and then back at his father, decided that, yes; his game would have to take back burner to his father's inquiries.

Carlisle continued to speak once he had Emmet's full attention. "How is Rose doing? She has been avoiding me for days and I thought by this time she would be over what happened last week." Carlisle looked toward the ceiling. The chance of Rosalie overhearing past the noise of the video game music that replayed over and over while it sat on pause, through the walls of the well insulated house, and up to the third floor were she had retreated to her bedroom for privacy was unlikely.

"She's doing alright, I guess," Emmet said, "She is not talking to Amanda yet, but she has been really loving towards me lately! She hasn't hit me in the head for saying stupid things at all this week. It is kind of a blessing!" Emmet beamed contently, not a care in the world.

"Hmm," Carlisle responded calmly, rubbing his hands together as he thought. "She has not accepted Amanda's apology?"

"Nope! She still thinks Amanda is Satan's spawn," Emmet replied right away with a laugh tacked on at the end. Seeing his father's shock at his words made him stop smiling and straightened up. "Rose's words, not mine," he explained with his hands in the air, surrendering.

"I see. Well then… I suppose I need to have a chat with Rosalie this evening then too," Carlisle replied as he stood up. Emmet seemed to be elated to get back to his game. "You have completed your schoolwork for tomorrow, correct?" He asked Emmet with a raised eyebrow.

"Yes, Sir! All done!"

"Alright. Carry on then, Son. Thank you for your time."

"Sure Pops! Anytime!" Emmet returned the gesture sincerely, but he quickly returned to his gaming and Carlisle exited from the room.

On his way up the stairs, Carlisle spotted Esme leaning over Amanda at the kitchen table. She was struggling with an explanation on how to divide improper fractions. It had been over forty years since Esme herself had been in school and unlike her children and husband who repeated classes, she was out of date with middle school mathematics. When she heard her husband walking up the stairs she patted Amanda's arm and said, "Just hold on a moment, my dear," and she hurried to over to Carlisle to ask him for assistance. "Would you mind, please, explaining fraction division to her? I am only confusing her more and she is not having a good time with her homework," Esme told Carlisle sweetly, nestling into his arms and batting her eyelashes coyly, though it was not necessary. Carlisle would do anything for his wife.

"Of course, Darling," He responded with a soft smile and he craned his neck to kiss her on the lips. Amanda was turned around at the table watching so he leaned back up again and smiled. Then he gently whispered to Esme so Amanda would not overhear, "I was on my way to speak to Rose. It seems she is upset about what happened last week and is giving Amanda a hard time."

"Hmm. Perhaps that is what is bothering Amanda. Despite what she tells me, something is bothering her, Carlisle," Esme whispered back in a concerned tone of voice. Amanda lost interest in watching them and she turned back to her paper and scribbled on the margin out of boredom as she waited for someone to come help her. "I will go talk to Rose," Esme offered Carlisle. "You help Amanda, dear."

"That's fine," he agreed and Esme rubbed his forearms a few times before heading on her way up the stairs.

Carlisle walked over to Amanda and leaned in to survey the problem she was stuck on. Amanda sighed and stopped doodling the flower around the hole punch and listened to her uncle try to explain what mixed numbers were and how to change them into improper fractions. The concept was not complicated, but Amanda was not retaining the theory. She was starting to anger over it and she pushed her paper away in disgust.

Carlisle, patient as always, noticed Amanda's building frustration and calmly placed the paper back in front of her. "Here, I will show you an example, Sweetheart. May I use your pencil, please?" He pulled up a chair for himself and tried again.

*

*

*

Knocking on her daughter's bedroom door, Esme waited patiently for an invite to the inside. She waited a few seconds and then knocked again.

"What?!" Rosalie responded hastily.

Esme opened the door and peered inside. "You had better try that again, dear. I expect a proper welcome," she scolded.

Rosalie clenched her teeth and closed her eyes to calm herself. She didn't like to be confronted when she was already in a foul mood. And Rosalie was not dumb; she knew the reason her mother had come to talk to her. It had been a week since she had last spoken to Amanda and her ignorance of her cousin had not gone unnoticed.

"Please… do come in," Rosalie said each word sharply with an almost sarcastic tone.

Esme sighed and entered the lacy, soft pink and white bedroom that was fit for a princess. Rosalie was dressed in a red, velvet robe with black mink fur around the neck and sleeve cuffs. She sat deeply into her chase lounge and crossed one leg over the other and she folded her arms in a defensive position. Esme walked over to her and sat down beside her.

"What now? Am I grounded some more for not talking to the little brat?"

"I am not here to scold you, Rosalie," Esme began lightly, "However, you are awfully defensive right now so that leads me to believe you are feeling insecure about something. Would you like to tell me what you are so angry about?"

"You know what I am angry about!" Rosalie accused.

"I do… that is if you are _still_ upset about what happened _last_ week," Esme said, emphasizing the time span that had passed by. Esme was trying very hard not to lose her calm composure. It would not help to yell or reprimand Rosalie if she wanted to get to the bottom of this situation. Rosalie was hot tempered, like Amanda, and needed time and a lot of understanding before she would come forth to volunteer her feelings.

Rosalie scowled and looked down at her hands, her full lips pressed firmly together, slightly pouted in determination.

"Am I correct in my understanding that Amanda apologized to you for bringing you into her web of lies?" Esme reached out to Rosalie to gain more information on the matter.

"Ya. So?" Rosalie insisted to hear the relevance of her mother's comment. Esme paused for a few seconds until Rosalie relaxed her protective posture.

"Well… do you think that she is sorry for what happened?" Esme asked Rosalie.

"I don't know! Maybe, but who cares if she is?!" Rosalie stated shrilly.

Esme waited again for her daughter to simmer down before she continued to speak. "Do you not care if she is sorry for what happened?" She turned the question around on her daughter.

Rosalie opened her mouth in disgust to answer, but she wasn't able to speak. She coughed out a grunt of frustration.

"Amanda is only twelve, Rosalie. Twelve-years-old and _human_. Every experience is new to her. She is learning a little bit each day and she makes mistakes along the way. That is normal for her. This was not the first time she has made a poor choice and it certainly won't be the last," Esme pointed out lovingly. She placed her hand on Rosalie's knee. "It is our job, as her family, to help her through those mistakes."

"It is not my job!" Rosalie huffed, still perturbed, but she spoke in a much softer tone. She sighed, feeling a bit sheepish now that her mother was pulling out the 'you are older and wiser' card.

Esme rubbed Rosalie's knee and nodded encouragingly. "Amanda looks up to you, Rose. Why do you think she came to you for help when she was scared to tell your father, Elizabeth, or I about her ears? She trusts you to take care of her," she cooed. "You may not have asked for that responsibility, but none-the-less, you have a strong influence over Amanda."

"Well, I…" Rosalie started. She closed her mouth; her flawless skin furrowed a bit in thought as she considered her mother's words. She sighed and looked at her mother in the eyes.

Esme smiled. "Your forgiveness is important to Amanda, dear. She needs to feel safe and secure around all of us."

"I know," Rosalie conceded in a low, ashamed voice. "I guess- I guess I was just… I was still upset that I messed up. I didn't realize that Dad could get into so much trouble if I forged his name. I didn't think."

And there it was. That was why Rosalie had not forgiven Amanda yet. She had not forgiven herself for her own part in the crime. She was ashamed and too proud to admit it. Esme was pleased that Rosalie was finally opening up to her. She was glad she had been patient in waiting for Rosalie to admit these things to her. It was only a matter of time before Rosalie would do the right thing, no matter how proud she was and how hard it was for her to admit her faults.

"It was a mistake, dear," Esme told her daughter kindly, "One that you have already been forgiven for." Rosalie unfolded her arms and pressed her hands on the rich material that covered her chase. "Do you think that Amanda deserves your forgiveness?" She asked her daughter. Rosalie glanced pitifully up at her mother and pouted. She knew that was the right thing to and she nodded in response to the leaned in and kissed Rosalie on the forehead. "Good girl. I am proud of you."

"I love you, Mom," Rosalie replied, with a tiny smile. She found it hard to admit, but her parent's approval meant the world to her. She would take what Esme said to heart about her responsibility in Amanda's upbringing. She did like the idea of being a role model of sorts to her little, human cousin. Rosalie's smile grew as she and her mother hugged.

*

*

*

"I CAN'T do it!" Amanda cried out in frustration and she tried to push her notebook off the table, but Carlisle was faster and put his hand there to stop it from falling off the edge. She had been making some progress with her fraction division until it came time to switching the fraction back to mixed numbers after the conversions had been made. She was normally a lot quicker to pick up on math concepts, but she was growing impatient and therefore she was not thinking as clearly.

"Amanda, calm down. Take a deep breath. Of course you can do this. I will help you. There is no pressure on you to understand it all right away. Math is something that takes years of practice to grasp the formulas and functions," Carlisle tried to reason with his young niece. She was holding her breath out of annoyance and her cheeks flushed red. "Let's try again, sweetheart. Fifteen over six can be made into a mixed numbers. Use division to do this. How many times can six go into fifteen?"

"Two," Amanda sniffled; glad she at least knew the answer to that question at least.

"Good. Yes!" Carlisle agreed positively, "And the remainder will go in the numerators spot over the six, the two is a whole number now. Remember?"

"Okay…" Amanda said, understanding up to a point. It was easy to do the math when her uncle broke the problems down into smaller problems. The trouble she had was completing an equation from start to finish on her own. She got lost on the way and when she got upset she gave up.

"Now reduce the fraction to its lowest terms and you will have your answer!" Carlisle announced with as much enthusiasm as he felt Amanda could handle in her fragile state.

Amanda looked at the two and three-sixth term and tried to recall what he meant by reduce to lower terms. _'Is that the same as simplifying?_' Amanda wondered. That is how Alice would always explain it to her. Amanda started to feel overwhelmed again because she didn't know the answer. All of a sudden she was not in control of her emotions and she broke down and began to sob. She dropped her head into her folded arms on the table to hide her face.

"Amanda?" Carlisle softly said her name, placing his hand on her back lovingly. "Sweetheart… What is going on? It is not like you to get so worked up over a little bit of homework. Tell me what you are upset about and maybe I can help."

"I… I'm j-just… Stupid!" Amanda mumbled though gasps for air.

Carlisle was able to understand her words though they did not sound very clear. He rubbed her back and leaned closer to her. "No," he uttered gently, "that is not true. You are a smart girl, Amanda. Something else is bothering you. Please tell me?"

"I don't know!" Amanda cried, sniffling into her sleeve, but not lifting her head up just yet. Then she relented and mumbled, "My head hurts."

"Does anything else hurt?" He asked her in a soft, compassionate voice. Amanda shook her head, rubbing her face in her folded arms. "Would you please sit up for a moment so I can have a quick look at you?"

Amanda didn't move right away, but when he placed his hand under her arm to guide her she let him. She swiveled in her seat to face him. He lightly probed behind her ears, under her jawline and the base of her neck to check for swelling, but he found none. Her breathing was labored from crying, but her heart and lungs seemed to be in perfect health. He felt her forehead again, but was sure she was not running a fever.

Carlisle was not overly worried. He presumed that her headache and fatigue was possibly a side effect from the antibiotics, which was not uncommon. She was over-tired and stressed, that was plain to see, but the fact she was complaining of pain in the first place proved to him that she was not going to be able to continue with her homework that evening. He looked down at his watch and then up at Amanda with thoughtful concern. Amanda wiped her face again with her sleeve as another tear crept out from her eye.

"I'll tell you what… It is about time for you to take your medication so I am going to get you a glass of cool water to sip on and once you have taken your pill and you can go up to bed."

"W-what ab-out m-my home-work?" Amanda stuttered. She was always being reminded how important her homework was and she didn't want to get in trouble later on for not having it completed. She was already grounded and didn't want to miss anymore swim practices after this week. Carlisle smiled reassuringly as he stood up to grab the water pitcher from the refrigerator. Amanda followed his movement through the kitchen as best as she could. Within seconds he was in front of her with a full glass and the last of her medication in his hand.

"You need to get some rest, dear. And I have to get to the hospital soon to check on a few of my patients. We can try again in the morning if you are feeling better," he answered her. She took the pill from his outreached hand and nodded. He then passed her the glass of cold water and made sure she had a firm grip on it before letting go on his end. Amanda sniffed and did as she was requested, taking the pill and a sip of water to swallow it down. Carlisle encouraged her to drink a few more sips and take the rest of the water up to bed with her in case she felt like drinking more of it later on.

Carlisle helped Amanda pack up her things and sent her upstairs. She did so silently, but with great relief. She honestly could not have carried on with her homework that evening in the mood she was in, and she was grateful her uncle understood.

*

*

*

Once, Amanda was in bed and Esme was informed that she was not in any danger — she just need rest — Carlisle went to the hospital to fill in for the night shift. Elizabeth, Alice and Jasper were still out of the house, gone hunting on the mainland for game. Esme wanted to get to the grocery store before it closed at nine. She was reluctant to leave the house and Amanda alone with only Emmet as a babysitter. Rosalie was going along with her because she needed some beauty products that only she liked to select. Amanda was asleep so Esme decided that leaving for a short hour would not be an issue.

"I have my cell phone on me if she wakes up and needs me for any reason," Esme told her son at the front door. Emmet nodded, bored already. "If you can't reach me, try Rosalie's cell. If you fail at reaching either of us, you will call your father at the hospital. Do you understand?" Emmet nodded again, this time with even less enthusiasm. "If something is even the tiniest bit out of order, you will not deal with it on your own. You need to consult with your father or me first. Amanda is not feeling very well so keep the noise down and let her rest. She probably won't wake up, she was so tired she fell asleep almost instantaneously, but-"

"Mom!" Emmet whined. "I know! I have been alone with her before. I won't eat her. I promise!"

"Not funny," Esme told her son, pointing a single finger at him in warning. Emmet closed his mouth, his lips making a straight line down the middle to show he was taking his mother's instructions seriously. "Be good. I will be back in about an hour so don't destroy the house while I am out. You got it?"

"Sure… anything for you, Mom!" Emmet answered playfully. Esme couldn't help but smile and she pointed her finger now at her cheek and turned her head. Emmet gave her a peck on the cheek and then she was gone.

*

*

*

It was almost an hour later; Emmet was still playing his video games, when he heard Amanda crying. The sound was so faint he could hardly hear it over the music of his game. He immediately jumped up from his place on the family room floor. He looked around nervously, worried that perhaps Amanda had been crying for longer and he had just not heard it. No one else was home to notice if that was the case or yell at him for not noticing, so he relaxed and ran up the stairs to Amanda's bedroom door so see what the matter was. He knocked, but before Amanda could answer he smelled blood and stepped away, holding his breath like he was supposed to do in any case like this.

"Amanda?!" He called out cautiously.

"GO AWAY!" she yelled back shrieking like a banshee. Her body wrecked with sobs.

Emmet dared not enter. Amanda had locked herself in the bathroom- not that it would stop any vampire who was intent on killing her if they truly wanted to. Emmet was sure he would never hurt her; he loved his baby cousin too much. He had gotten a lot stronger in resisting Amanda's scent over the last three years that they had been a family, but Amanda was still going to do anything she could to keep everyone away from her at a time like this.

To Be Continued....

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_**Thank you for reading. **_

_Coming up next: Well... the title will be, "Hope to Die," so I think you can guess what the next chapter is about: Preteen humiliation._


	33. Hope To Die

_HOPpy Easter! Hope someBUNNY brought you chocolate or jelly beans! Hehehe! :P_

_New Drawing Alert-- posted on my DeviantART account. Links can be found on my profile if you are interested in viewing an illustration of Amanda's Humiliation._

_Thank you for your patience in getting this chapter up. I appreciate all the kind, encouraging reviews. :) This chapter is just cruel to poor, Amanda. :S Haha. I mean...sometimes life is not fair, but imagine going through this momentous life hurdle while living with a houseful of vampires?  
_

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**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Thirty-Three**

|Hope To Die|

Esme and Rosalie were at the check out of the Safeway store when the call from Emmet rang through on Esme's cell. She picked up speedily seeing it was 'home' calling. Her maternal instincts told her something was not right. "Hello? Emmet? What is it? Does Amanda need me?" She asked in a string of fast sentences.

"Mom, don't freak out, but we have a code red situation," Emmet announced calmly.

"Pardon me?" Esme inquired, "Code red?" It took her repeating the term to understand the meaning behind it. She nearly dropped her purse in pure horror as images of an injured Amanda flashed through her mind.

"There is blood…" He told his mother to confirm her worst nightmare, but before he could continue to explain that things were under control at the house Esme began to panic.

"Blood?" She gasped. "Is she alright? Do you need to call an ambulance? Emmet, get out of the house now if you can't handle it!" A few people around Esme jumped at her voice and watched her with interest. Rosalie put down the gossip magazine she was reading and stood beside her mother to listen in on the call.

"I_ am_ outside, Mom! Amanda told me she is not hurt. I think it might be the other kind of bleeding. You know…the womanly kind," Emmet struggled to say the words. "She is crying a lot, though, and I don't think I am the best one to talk sense into her right now. I do not know about this sort of thing. I told her I would call Dad, but that only made her scream at me some more. She is locked in the bathroom and says she is not EVER coming out and she meant serious business, Mom! I don't know how anyone will talk her out."

Rosalie placed her hand on her mother's shaking one and took over the situation. "I will take care of her," Rosalie said calmly. "Let me have your phone please."

Esme handed over her phone.

"Hey Babe, stay out of Amanda's way until we get there, okay. We'll be home soon," Rosalie told her mate and then she hung up the phone. Esme made a beeline for the door, but Rosalie took her hand to stop her. "Not yet," she said, hitting a contact number on Esme's cell and hitting send. "We need to call Liz, first."

*

*

*

Esme and Rosalie drove down the long, extended driveway towards the lake house. Esme parked in front of the garage door and let her daughter out immediately. Rosalie raced to the door to check on the situation.

It was raining out, but that didn't bother Emmet, who was sitting alone on the front steps with his chin in his hands and his elbows resting on his knees. He stared wide-eyed and forlorn at his mate as she hurried to his side.

"How is she?" Rosalie inquired impatiently, tapping the brown paper bag filled with feminine products against her thigh that Elizabeth instructed her to buy.

Emmet shrugged and pursed his lips. He was bummed that he could not be inside playing his video game. He was not sure when he would be allowed back in the house. There was no precedent for when your human cousin becomes a woman when you are a teenage vampire living in the same home. Emmet was confused, trying to make sense of everything.

"She is still up there crying. Listen!" Emmet pointed out, fingering up to the window that was facing the lake. It was Amanda's bedroom window. And faintly, Amanda's quiet sobs could be heard over the rain pitter-pattering over every surface in its path. Rosalie looked up and then patted Emmet on the shoulder as she walked passed him.

Esme came and sat on the step next to her son and wrapped her arm around him. "I am proud of you," she whispered to him. He hugged his mother back, happy to be on the receiving end of praise for a change. He so often was being chastised for his big mouth and impulsive pranks.

Meanwhile, Rosalie made her way upstairs and stood outside Amanda's bedroom door. She knocked twice and waited. When she heard nothing but sniffles from inside, she let herself in the dark bedroom. A light shone from underneath the bathroom door and Rosalie sighed. She noticed the blankets all torn off the bed and the sheets missing.

"Amanda?" she said gently, walked up to the bathroom door. There was still no answer. "I know you are upset, Amanda. Let me in and we'll talk, okay? I can help you to deal with this…issue. You'll see. It is not such a bad thing."

"Go Away!"

"I am not going anywhere," Rosalie asked. "So you let me in, or you come out here, and I will help you."

"I don't need your help!" Amanda shouted followed by several sharp sobs that made Rosalie cringe. She remembered well how hideous a time it was for her, as a young girl, when she had her monthly. It had eight decades since she last had to deal with the womanly hindrance, but she had a pretty good recall for anything unpleasant from her past it seemed. She also knew how much easier it was for girls today to tend to their hygiene needs now that there were so many products on the market.

"Fine, but you need some supplies. Esme and I brought them from the store for you. Elizabeth told us which ones to get since we were a little bit out of date on the matter. You have to let me if you want them," Rosalie told her little cousin to persuade her to open the bathroom door.

"Just l-leave th-them and g-go!" Amanda sputtered as she tried to contain her weeping.

"Come on, let me in. It is just me," Rosalie pleaded softly, hoping Amanda would not make her break the doorknob to get inside. That would not help matters. "We'll have a talk, you'll feel better, and it will be over. You can't hide in there forever."

When they lived in Denali, the first few months Amanda was determined she would not leave her room. She would lock the door and sit on the floor beside her bed and cover her ears whenever someone tried to talk to her. Eventually, Carlisle had no choice but to remove the lock from her door. He insisted, under no circumstances, was anyone to break down the door or the lock. He didn't want to violate Amanda's privacy in that way. He thought it would make her feel less secure if they used their strength to get their way with her.

Amanda was still crying. Hard, gasping breaths that sounded painful just to listen too. Rosalie understood this was more about humiliation than it was anything else. Amanda was informed of the female reproductive system; it was a special class that the middle school girls took every year to prepare them. Still, this must have come as a shock to Amanda, who not only had to deal with her first menstrual cycle, but she had to cope under the pressure in a house filled with vampires. She was mortified.

Rosalie clicked her tongue on the roof of her mouth, waiting to hear from Amanda, but the cries were all that came. Suddenly, Alice and Jasper appeared. Alice, had seen for herself this was coming, but caught on too late when she, Jasper, and Elizabeth were on the North end of the Island hunting. Elizabeth was prepared to guide Rosalie with what to buy at the pharmacy, but was not sure she could handle being too close to Amanda at this time so she stayed away as a precaution -- hating herself for being too weak to comfort Amanda at this time.

"Amanda, Liz sends her love. I came to offer you some comfort!" Alice chirped, utterly too happy for the tone of the situation. Rosalie shot her a nasty look.

A painful, high-pitched wail pierced the air. It sounded like, "Get out!" Rosalie pushed Alice away from the door, with a hard expression.

"Hey!" Alice yelped. "I came to help! Liz said something about Midol and a heating pad. I don't know what she is talking about, but she told me to tell Amanda not to worry beca-"

"She doesn't need your help!" Rosalie argued, annoyed. "We've already talked to Liz." Rosalie felt she had been making headway with Amanda, but the sobs that had been slowly fading into gasps were starting to pick up again and she heard Amanda's body shuffle further away from the door because a crowd was forming in her room. "She is scared. You're scaring her!"

"I am not!" Alice yelled back at her sister. "She knows I would never hurt her! I have just as clean a record as you have!"

"That is not what I meant, Alice, and you know it! She needs to be with someone calm and rational, not a perky, little know-it-all, who ironically knows nothing about what she is going through!"

"I just want to help," Alice hissed, angry that Rosalie would try to stop her good intentions. She was very protective of Amanda.

"You don't even remember going through this, Alice. How much help can you really give her right now?" Rosalie snarled. She literally towered over her little, pixie sister, who was not at all intimidated. "I remember, so let me handle it!"

Alice growled back lightly, but with intent to threaten, and stepped closer to Rosalie.

"Ladies!" Jasper stepped in between his sisters. "This, _certainly_, is not helping Amanda right now." Both sisters stopped and followed his hand to the bathroom door and they listened to Amanda ragged breathing. "We all need to remain calm. This show we are putting on — making this a bigger deal than it needs to be — is precisely why she is in there wrecked out on the floor. Instead of doing what you want to do to help her, ask her what she wants you to do and respect her wishes."

"Jasper's right," Alice backed down first, feeling silly for growling at her sister. She was just so used to protecting Amanda, she had lost sight of the fact that Rosalie was capable of the same affections. Rosalie sighed and nodded, not wanting to fight with Alice either.

The faint smell of blood in the air did burn their throats, but none of them were overwhelmed by it. None of them were a threat to Amanda at this time.

Only, Amanda knew that she was hurting them in a way, even if it was out of her control. She had not heard everything that had been said by her cousins, but she knew they were still outside the door. Amanda stifled her tears for a while. She was so tired and the sharp gasps were not enough to replace the oxygen she had lose from crying so intensely. She was finding it hard to relax as her anxiety was building.

"Amanda, it's Jasper. I know you don't want to see me, but I want to offer you my assistance if you need it. I can work through the door if that makes you more comfortable. Is there anything I can do to help you right now?" he asked for her permission before he assumed she would want him to alter her emotions.

There was a long silence. Rosalie sighed and folded her arms across her chest, the paper bag she clung to still in her one hand. There was the sound of another vehicle pulling up in the drive. Alice zipped out of the room to greet their father and to fill him in.

Just when it seemed like Amanda was not going to answer, she piped up in a jagged breath, "I-I can't — breath, J-jazz," She was on the floor, curled up, and she had worked herself into such a state she was desperate enough to ask for help.

Her meek request was all Jasper wanted to hear. He nodded, though she could not see him, and then went to work sending her the strength she needed to calm herself down. "You're alright. Just relax and take some deep breaths, darlin'," Jasper said peacefully as he helped alter her panicked mind into a more serene mode. Soft, calming waves seemed to open up Amanda's chest again and she was able to finally catch her breath.

*

*

*

A minute later, Amanda's sedated even breaths were all that could be heard from inside the bathroom.

Emmet had been allowed back inside now that the whole family was home. The crashing sounds of his video game were the only other sounds audible to everyone's sensitive ears.

Alice stayed away and kept Elizabeth company by going for a walk around the lake. It was hard for Alice to leave her best friend lying on the bathroom floor. She was trying to be respectful of Amanda's feelings, which were more rational now what with Jasper on the other side of the door coaxing her along.

Rosalie was allowed to stay, as well. Amanda was showing some interest in the bag of supplies her cousin was taunting her with. Amanda confided in Rosalie that her back was hurting very badly. Rosalie was doing her best to assure Amanda the little, white Midol's would help, if she would just open the door and let her inside so she could give them to her. Amanda was almost ready to give in. She had inched towards the door to do so when she was ready, but she was interrupted.

All this progress was thrown out the window; so to speak, the moment Carlisle came in the room to offer his assistance.

Rosalie gawked at her father when she saw him. He was a loving man and always wanted to help people, so it was hard to be upset with him for his efforts, but Rosalie could not believe he didn't think before he came in and spoke to Amanda. She foresaw how Amanda would take to this intervention before it began. She shook her head to try to stop him from interfering, but Carlisle paid no heed to his daughter's warning.

"Sweetheart?" he said gently to Amanda, testing the atmosphere.

Jasper watched his father patiently.

Carlisle put his hand on the ivory painted, wood door of the bathroom and waited. Amanda stopped breathing altogether when she heard his voice. "How about you come out and we can have a little talk? There is no need for you to suffer with this alone. Please come out?"

"Leave me ALONE!" Amanda shouted, her voice cracking, making Carlisle and Rosalie wince at the high pitched sound. Jasper's face scrunched up as he lost his grip over Amanda's emotions. Suddenly he was hit with a very overwhelming wave of deep despair and embarrassment and Amanda began to cry again. She cried silently, but it was evident from the change in her breathing pattern that another panic attack was on the way.

Rosalie looked her father sternly in the eyes. "Dad!" Rosalie scolded in a very loud, stage whisper. She put her hands on his chest and pushed him slowly out of the room into the hallway. "Look what you did!"

"She need not be in pain. There is a full bottle of Midol in the cabinet in my study that I kept on hand for this purpose," Carlisle explained innocently, not seeing what he was doing that was so horrible.

"I have Midol in here!" Rosalie waved the brown paper bag in the air as she guided her father out into the hallway.

Amanda's cries had ruptured again, this time with a rhythmic panting as her whole body shook from humiliation. She hated that everyone was aware of her physical state, even in the privacy of her own bathroom. "I wish I were dead!" She shouted dramatically at one point. "Like _actually_ dead!" In response Rosalie rolled her eyes while Carlisle's mouth gaped in horror towards the scene.

"She's just being a drama Queen, Dad. She doesn't mean it. In her mind this is the worst thing to possibly happen to her, especially when she lives with our family. She will get over it when she is able to rationalize thoughts again," Rosalie said steadily. "Please let me handle it."

Jasper was softly talking to Amanda, trying to get her to let him calm her down, but with her overbearing upset he could not do anything without her willingness to cooperate. Jasper got up and moved outside to join Rosalie and Carlisle. He stiffened uncomfortably as he spoke to his father on Amanda's behalf. "With all due respect, Dad…. You are not helping. Amanda is embarrassed and your presence is putting her on the edge of another anxiety attack that I won't be able to control if you are in there giving her the 'this happens to every woman' speech."

"Well, it-" Carlisle was not able to finish before Rosalie cut him off impatiently.

"Sorry, Dad, I know you mean well," Rosalie explained, "but the only reason she is allowing Jasper and I to be in there is because Jasper is not forcing her to come out when she is not ready and I am a woman, similar in age, who understands what she is going through! Honestly, I think Liz would be the best suited to talk to her, but she told me what products to bring her and asked me to speak with Amanda and that is what I am _trying _to do." Rosalie emphasized the last part with aggravation.

"I am a doctor, Rosalie. There is nothing I-" Carlisle tried to reason with his daughter, not grasping just how embarrassing this was for Amanda.

Rosalie gawked impatiently and cut him off. "No, Dad. you don't get it! You are her grandpa — uncle — or whatever… Not to mention, a _man_! You are the last person she wants to see right now," Rosalie insisted. "Besides…no kid wants a doctor to teach her about reproduction. It is just not interesting the way you tell it, Dad." She could not believe how silly men were sometimes.

Jasper bowed his head, stifling a small grin, and then headed back into the bedroom.

Amanda's ragged attempts for breath proved Carlisle's interference had upset her. Carlisle looked to Jasper, who was trying again to calm the situation at hand, and then back at Rosalie. "I will be in my office if she needs me for any reason. I trust you to handle this, Rose," he conceded.

Rosalie thanked him for understanding and his trust. She hoped she could prove to him she deserved to rejoin his practice. Carlisle left and she closed Amanda's bedroom door behind him and walked over to where Jasper was crouched by the bathroom door. Amanda was just starting to relax again.

"He is gone now. Let me in, Amanda, and we'll send Jasper away so you and I can be alone," Rosalie insisted with an authoritativeness that surprised Jasper. Amanda was considering it. They both sensed that she was caving in, utterly spent from weeping.

Jasper stood up before hearing Amanda's reply. "I am going to go play video games with Emmet, Amanda. You call me if you need me, okay?" He told her.

"O-kay," Amanda peeped a few seconds later. Rosalie smiled at her brother and stroked his arm gratefully as he prepared to leave. He tipped his head and winked subtly and then he flew out of the room, the door shutting so softly behind him that Amanda had not heard it. "Is he gone?" she asked meekly.

"Yes, it is just the two of us," Rosalie answered. She didn't hurry Amanda along. She just waited and within seconds Amanda crawled to the door and unlocked it. Amanda sat back down with her knees crunched up to her chest defensively. Rosalie slipped inside with ease and closed the door behind her. Amanda had all the sheets soaking in the tub with her soiled pajama bottoms. She was dressed in a fresh set of nightwear. It was not nearly the mess Rosalie feared.

*

*

*

Thirty Minutes Later…

Overall, the conversation between Amanda and Rosalie had gone smoothly. Amanda had continued to be teary — unable to squash her humiliation — but soon she came to realize that there was not a lot that crying was going to accomplish. Rosalie actually teased her about dehydration at one point.

Amanda grew more comfortable with having Rosalie near her after a while and saw that she was not in any danger. Rosalie didn't show any more discomfort than usual, so that made Amanda feel a little bit better. She had jumped to conclusions, thinking that she might have to lock herself away for days every month to avoid her family of vampires.

However, this was not something she could get rid of, so she graciously listened to everything her cousin had to say about this huge milestone in her life and tried to be reasonable about it.

Rosalie brought out the contents of the paper bag and they both looked at the pamphlets and instructions together. Amanda's embarrassment eased when she figured out what the products were for and how they would help her conceal her cycle from the others. Rosalie then went into a graphic, but 'long story short' version about sexual reproduction that had her forcing back laughter when she heard Emmet shout, "Woot," when she added that the act is not merely for reproduction purposes only.

Amanda cracked a smile, liking how candid Rosalie was with her. The talk was a lot more helpful than the one that the school nurse had given her grade six class the previous school year. Amanda was glad she already knew some of the details so she didn't have to ask questions of Rosalie, though. She had enough humiliation to last her for a lifetime already.

When they were done, Rosalie stepped out of the bathroom to give Amanda some privacy. "You take all the time you need, Amanda," Rosalie offered as she closed the bathroom door and continued to talk through. "I will be downstairs for a few minutes and will bring you up a hot water bottle for you. That Midol should be kicking in soon and you will be feeling a lot better once you get back in bed and rest, okay?"

"Okay," Amanda piped up from on the inside, waiting a few seconds before tending to her needs so she could be sure she had no one prying at the bathroom door. Amanda was still a bit nervous about everything that she and Rosalie had just discussed, but she trusted her cousin to know this stuff. Rosalie was young in appearance, but had been around long enough to know a lot. It was certainly easier to hear about menstruation from her young, teenage cousin than Esme or Elizabeth, who were like mothers to her. It was ten times better than hearing the speech from Dr Cullen, Amanda felt.

Amanda finished up in the bathroom, overcoming a few firsts, and then she cleaned up and hurried back into her bed. She was pleased to find that Rosalie was already there, with the bed made up, fresh sheets already tucked in, and a small, pink blanket was lying on the bed.

"Apparently — according to Liz — water bottles are not in fashion anymore and we now own what is known as a heating pad," Rosalie announced with a smile. She patted the bed next to where she sat, leaning against some of Amanda's pillows by the headboard.

Amanda returned the gesture with a weak grin as she crawled up onto her bed and slipped under the covers. Rosalie placed the electric blanket, that was already plugged into the wall, over Amanda's lower abdomen and helped her to get comfortable before pulling the duvet up to Amanda's chin.

"Thanks, Rose," Amanda said softly.

"You're welcome, Amanda," Rosalie pardoned.

"Do you still hate me?" Amanda questioned shyly, raising her eyes to meet Rosalie's.

"No, I don't hate you. I could never hate you. Why would you think-?" Rosalie began sharply. Amanda winced and looked away. Rosalie felt guilty for holding such a grudge on Amanda for her involvement in the infected pierced ear fiasco. "I…I just forget how young you are sometimes, Amanda. I shouldn't be so hard on you. I don't hate you — not at all."

Amanda was silent. She had not known that. In fact, she had always thought Rosalie didn't like her as well as the others did. Sure, she let Amanda borrow her makeup, but she was often aloof and resented Amanda for a lot of the human qualities she possessed. Rosalie had never said so much as to diss Amanda straightforwardly, but she was so haughty sometimes it translated as dislike.

Neither girl was one for sharing their feelings out loud so the topic of what their relationship entailed was never established. Amanda hoped they were friends. She liked Rosalie and liked to think of her as a sort of a 'big sister'. Alice was her best friend, but Rosalie was far more mature and Amanda looked up to Rosalie in a lot of ways.

"I'm sorry for getting you in trouble last week," Amanda apologized, not sure what else to say. "I shouldn't have asked you to help me." She looked down at her quilt sadly as she spoke.

Rosalie had said she would forgive Amanda, and she planned to follow through. She had come to realize that she had been petty. It was not all Amanda's fault. She chose to lie to her parents as well and she was the one who forged her father's name to get the pills Amanda needed to clear up the infection in her ears. She was responsible for her own part in that scheme.

"I am glad you choose to come to me for help, Amanda. I will always help you if you are in trouble," Rosalie replied softly. "However, next time we will not be going being my dad's back to try to avoid it. I can only blame myself getting involved in your lie. You are not to responsible for my part in the whole scheme. I am older. I should have known better and insisted we do the right thing the moment you confided in me."

"So…we're still friends then?" Amanda pressed, watching Rosalie for her reaction.

Rosalie smiled and laughed one tiny laugh and then nodded. "Yes. We're friends!"

"Good," Amanda blurted out, her confidence returning as her pain in her lower back and abdomen faded away. She smiled and Rosalie, but her eyes were puffy and red from crying. She could hardly keep them open any longer.

"You should get some sleep. It is not fair, but you still have to go to school tomorrow regardless of your monthly. You'd better rest up!" Rosalie announced, ending the conversation in a way, letting Amanda know that their friendship was intact.

Rosalie was up and by the door in a flash, but she waited to make sure Amanda was all right before she left the room.

Amanda pursed her lips in thought. "Hey, Rosie?" she hinted.

"Yes, Amanda?" Rosalie questioned, noting the tone of Amanda's voice. She waited.

"Will you read to me until I fall asleep? Like you used to do when I wasn't feeling well?" Amanda asked cautiously, hoping not to be turned down. It was hard enough for her to ask for something in the first place. "Please?"

Rosalie smirked. "Oh, all right!" she gave in right away. Amanda beamed and shifted over a bit so Rosalie could reposition herself on the bed next to her again. Rosalie picked up_ 'Anne of Green Gables'_ from the nightstand and opened it up to the bookmarked page. Amanda cuddled right up to Rosalie, their skin not touching through the thick blankets so she wouldn't be cold.

Before she began, Rosalie turned to Amanda and kissed the crown of her head. "You know I would do anything for you, don't you?" she stated.

It was not a question.

* * *

_**Rosalie is not all bad, eh?** I mean...she can be quite helpful and loving underneath how selfish and in love with herself she is. :) I wish Liz could have helped more, but I felt that it would not make as much sense since she is the least used to being around humans and blood and all that. I wanted her influence though, so that is why Rosalie called her for help in the store. :) **And what do you think about Carlisle in this chapter? **_

_New Drawing Alert-- Links can be found on my profile if you are interested in viewing an illustration of Amanda's Humiliation._

_Coming up next: Some more embarrassing sex talk....and someone takes on the persona of a green monster. Dun dun dun. _

**_Thanks for reading_**


	34. Ambushed

_Thank you to catharticone for beta-ing this chapter for me. :)_

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**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Thirty-Four**

|Ambushed|

Esme was floating around the kitchen preparing Amanda's evening meal while Alice was helping Amanda with homework at the table. It had been a few days since her ungraceful leap into womanhood. Amanda was feeling much better now after having a several days to adjust to the traumatic event.

Everyone was being kind and hadn't brought up the topic again, not even Carlisle, who was trying to take Rosalie's advice and not lecture Amanda on the changes her body was going through. He was a reasonable man — he understood how difficult this was for Amanda — but he was not entirely satisfied with the 'sex talk' given by Rosalie to Amanda. It had been informative, but Rosalie had focused more on the positives than the negatives, and he was biding his time to have a sit-down with Amanda so he could finish what Rosalie had begun.

A door was opened and closed and in a second the room held two more beings. Esme's face lit up when she saw her blonde daughter and husband arrive home from a late evening at the clinic where they had been giving out flu vaccinations.

Rosalie was beaming from the inside out.

"Hi, honey," Carlisle greeted his wife, pulling her into him and giving her lips a passionate kiss. Amanda made a face and turned her head down to her history textbook again.

"How was your day, darling?" Esme asked when he released her.

"Swell. You would have been so proud of our daughter," Carlisle preened, reaching out for Rosalie now that Esme was not in his arms. He pulled his daughter to his side and hugged her. "She was very professional and preformed her very first procedure on a patient today…with their consent, of course."

"That's wonderful, baby!" Esme praised, hugging Rosalie too. Then she kissed her daughter on the forehead sweetly. "I am so proud of you."

"Thank, Mom," Rosalie accepted the praise willingly. She couldn't help but be thrilled, too. Mr Lapinski, and elderly gentleman who had come to really like Dr Cullen, had been kind enough to allow her some training when it came to his flu shot that evening. It was a minor procedure, but she interacted with a human none-the-less.

"You were wonderful, Rose," Carlisle told her again, kissing her cheek and squeezing her hand affectionately. Pride oozed from him. "I am so pleased that you are showing such great potential in this field. It is a tremendous accomplishment!"

Alice fidgeted in her seat at the table. Amanda noticed she seemed to have bit of a pout on.

"How will it work, though?"Alice asked coldly. "She may be able to pass as a young adult for a few years with the proper make up and dress, but she will never get the respect she needs to make medicine her fulltime profession!"

"Alice!" Esme gasped, "you bite your tongue or you apologize right away for your sour behavior. This is a good day for your sister. You should show her some support!"

Alice decided to bite her tongue, and she looked the other way. Rosalie didn't seem to mind — she was too pleased with herself. She smiled as she remembered something and she rushed to Amanda's side.

Amanda saw how big her cousin's grin was and knew something was not quite right. "What?" Amanda asked cautiously.

"Well…I was reading the school notices on the counter this morning and you will be getting your Hep B shot at school next week!"

"No way!" Amanda proclaimed. "I already got that one!"

"They are a series of three vaccinations, sweetheart," Carlisle informed her kindly. She had received her first of those vaccinations in Alaska from him, but she had forgotten that there were others to follow up.

Amanda frowned. The Cullen kids didn't need vaccines so they always brought in notes from their doctor/father that said they had already received said vaccination. The Cullens thought it was best to follow the same procedure with Amanda since it was well known she lived with their family, and it would be most likely that she would get the same treatment.

"Boooo!" Amanda booed, not terribly afraid of needles like some kids were, but she was not a big fan. The idea of being poked with a sharp object was never a pleasant one.

"Anyway…" Rosalie continued, bored since she was not yet able to get her point across. "I was thinking that I could give you your inoculation this time!"

"Um…How about, no?!" Amanda answered right away and then she laughed. She didn't like getting shots from Carlisle either, but the thought of being her cousin's guinea pig was worse.

Rosalie was determined. "Please? I need more practice, and who better than my sweet, baby cousin who will give me all the loving support I need?" She smiled at Amanda pleadingly.

Amanda narrowed her eyes and pursed her lips.

"Pretty please?" Rosalie added, hopeful that Amanda was swaying. "You owe me, remember?" And she shot Amanda a knowing raise of her brow.

Amanda sighed and gave in. "Well…maybe," she decided. Rosalie took this as a yes and pulled Amanda off her chair into a hug. Amanda grunted and struggled, but it was no use. When one of her family members really wanted a hug, they would get it. "I said, maybe! You know what you're doing, right?"

"Yes, of course!" Rosalie said, and she let Amanda go. She straightened up her clothes and ran away in a flash, seeing as she had gotten what she wanted. She had to go share her good news with Emmet.

"She won't kill me, will she?" Amanda asked jokingly, though to the rest of the family it was not an actual concern. She glanced to Alice, who was staring a nasty hole through the table, for reassurance.

Carlisle spoke up. "I will be there to guide her, sweetie. You have nothing to worry about," he reassured her, smiling fondly. "In fact, you are in just as good of hands with Rosalie as you would be with me. Her restraint for being near human blood is remarkable." He turned to Esme and they shared a loving gaze, both of them over the moon with their daughter's success. It wasn't often Rosalie was passionate about something humane.

"Alice, what gives?" Amanda questioned Alice about her sullen mood. She had expected Alice's insight when she had asked the question, not her uncle's.

Alice perked up, and her lips twitched into a smile when she caught on that her parents and Amanda had all been watching her pout. "Oh, nothing. I was just thinking. Nothing concrete yet. I will let you know when I know more." And then she was gone.

"I hate when she does that!" Amanda commented, staring at the now empty seat that once occupied her study buddy.

*

*

*

The next morning brought freezing weather, but there was no snow, no rain and the sun was shining! It appeared to be the beginning of a good day!

Amanda raced out of her bedroom dressed in her favorite hot pink skirt and black knee-highs with bobble ties on them. She wore with it a crisp, white, button up blouse with a pink and black vest on top. She had a simple pair of hot pink pumps that she planned to wear with the outfit. She had zipped them into her backpack so her mother, aunt, or uncle could not see and tell her that the heel was too high, even though it was only a few inches. Alice had bought the outfit for her for Christmas and it looked great on her. She had her eyeliner and pink lip-gloss also hidden in her bag to be put on at school or on the way to school.

Amanda hummed as she jumped from the third stair to the second floor main level on her way down for breakfast. It was a bit of an awkward landing, and she nearly toppled over with the momentum she had picked up from sprinting down the stairs. She managed to keep her footing and she ran into the kitchen, passing Jasper who was leaning against the wall watching her. He beamed to witness her unusual cheer so early in the morning on a school day.

"Hey Jazzy!" Amanda smiled back at him.

"Wow!" Elizabeth thrilled, putting one hand on her hip and staring at Amanda with an open mouth. "Someone is in a good mood this morning."

It was a rare treat for Amanda to be up and ready without any coaxing. On top of that, Amanda was in high spirits. Carlisle, who was reading a newspaper at the kitchen table, stopped for a brief moment to glance over the top of the pages.

"Yep!" Amanda replied, as she hopped up on the bar stool in front of her place mat. Elizabeth had already poured her a glass of orange juice and had a bowl of raisin bran sitting out for her. The soymilk that Amanda liked was sitting next to the bowl and so was a spoon. She wasn't smiling per se, but there was a hint of a smile on her face as she poured the milk and picked up her spoon.

"I am almost afraid to ask the reason behind your sudden shift in attitude," Elizabeth said with a chuckle.

"We don't want to jinx it," Esme agreed. Both women nudged each other affectionately as they enjoyed watching Amanda dig into her breakfast.

"You _are_ rather elated, Amanda," Jasper offered his official take on her feelings. "It is wonderful to see — and feel — but really… Why so joyful?"

Amanda pointed outside with her spoon as her mouth was full and she could not speak. The sun was glistening off the waterfront. Jasper bowed his head to show his understanding. Alice came into the kitchen and Jasper's face quickly fell. He pulled her into his chest and hugged her with her back to him and rested his chin on her head.

"This is horrible!" Alice complained.

Amanda had just stuffed her mouth with another load of food, but she was confused and curious so she asked, "Whaaa-eey?" It was hard to talk with her mouth full.

Elizabeth gave her a disapproving look.

Amanda shrugged and then realized before getting an answer that the reason Alice was unhappy _was_ the sunshine. It meant that the Cullens had to stay home. Like the most reliable meteorologist, Alice had informed her family in advance so they could schedule around the nice weather.

Carlisle had not booked appointments for these days and closed down the clinic for a short family holiday, saying he was taking everyone hiking during the daytime, but the clinic would be open in the evening for a few hours on each of these days to compensate for his absence.

The kids were all pulled out of school under the same excuse. Amanda, however, still had to go to school seeing as it was her first — and only — time going through the education system. The family decided, since Amanda was legally Amanda Roth, she could plausibly not be involved in the 'Cullen family hiking trips.' Though Amanda disliked school, she loved competitive swimming, and with the first swim meet of the winter season coming up on the weekend she had to keep her grades up if she wanted to participate.

"I really don't appreciate this nice, winter weather. My inner forecast showed that the clouds wouldn't be back until Friday! What am I supposed to do all day for four days when you're at school?" Alice ranted.

Amanda finished swallowing a huge lump of food in her mouth so she could respond. "Do whatever you used to do before you knew me!"

"That is a silly idea, Mandi! What does it matter what I used to do on sunny days before I knew you? I know you now! Rosalie refuses to let me dress her and doesn't let me do her hair or nails like you do," Alice whined.

Amanda shrugged and gave Alice a sympathetic head tilt. "You and Jazz can do stuff together," she suggested innocently.

Alice thought for a moment and then smiled wildly. Jasper was doing his best to hide his smile, but it was not working. Amanda caught the sly look they each wore, and she made a face of disgust as she figured out what they were planning to do with their 'free day.' "Ew!" she cried out, tossing her spoon into her dish, not able to finish because of where the topic had traveled.

"We're old enough!" Alice justified. "It is completely natural for us to-"

"Alice!" Esme stopped her daughter before she could continue. She was well aware of her children's relationships and their rights to fulfill certain needs, but she didn't like them speaking openly about such topics in front of Amanda. Alice and Jasper may look like young teenagers, but they were over a century old and it would be unfair to assume they would not be intimate with one another — as they would never get any older. Still, Esme didn't want to flash their seemingly young love in front of Amanda.

"She said, 'ew' Mom!" Alice convinced her mother. "She thinks it is gross when we do stuff because we're over one hundred years old. If that is what she thinks then she is obviously not going to get any ideas from us. Don't worry."

Amanda nodded in agreement, her face stuck in a horrified frown, hoping the conversation would end soon. That was exactly what she thought about her family members being intimate. She was not of an age where she liked to hear about or talk about sex.

Alice continued, "Still, it is not like Jazz and I are that old. I mean… Dad is three hundred and-"

Amanda grimaced. "Eeeeeeww!" she drowned Alice out. "Ew. Ew. Ew!"

Carlisle held his paper a little bit higher now. Alice giggled and Jasper hung his head at the awkward scene.

"Amanda!" Elizabeth gasped. "Don't be rude."

Esme was smiling so fondly, thinking about her husband, that Amanda couldn't stand to look at her. There was something very wrong with the picture of her biological grandmother and Carlisle making love, no matter how young looking and beautiful they were. Amanda hunched into herself a bit and shuddered. Then she got up and grabbed her dishes to distract herself.

"I have school," Amanda said as she put her glass, spoon, and bowl in the dishwasher. She kept her head down to hide her embarrassment as she put the soymilk away. She avoided eye contact with everyone as she picked up her backpack and hurried out of the room. "I need someone to pick me up at five after practice!" she announced as she left the room.

It would be dark out by that time.

"See you at five, dear," Esme called out.

Then she and Elizabeth both sang, "Have a great day…Be good," at the same time.

Amanda didn't know how to respond, so she continued down to the main level to get her warm coat and boots on. With the usual ride to school, her brother's Jeep, sitting at home for the day and her parents unable to show their sparkly skin in town, she was forced to take the bus. She layered on her clothing and boots and a winter jacket and then headed out the door into the bright sunlight.

She loved the way it lit everything up like it was summer. The cold wind on her face reminded her it was winter, but she enjoyed the sun's heat regardless. It was also nice to be alone for a change with no vampire supervision. Amanda smiled at the thought of how free she was. Not that the Cullens were overly strict, but it was nice to not have perfect, scrutinizing eyes on her every second of the day.

Amanda felt the spring in her step as she walked to the bus stop at the end of their long, private driveway. _Yes, today is going to be a good day, _she felt.

*

*

*

And it had been a good day…At school, anyhow. Unfortunately, the moment she arrived home, she was ambushed by Rosalie.

"It's time for your Hep B Shot!" Rosalie sang out far too merrily. "I thought we'd do it in Dad's study — dad and I snuck out to the clinic today to get the vaccine so we are all set and ready to go!" She was behaving a lot like Alice with her perkiness.

"But…What about the others?" Amanda asked, helplessly trying to come up with a way out of this as her eager cousin hauled her by the arm up the staircase.

"The others went shopping, so it is just you, me, and Dad. Well, and Emmet in the garage, but I made him promise to stay out there!"

"But…but…" Amanda stuttered, digging her heals into the carpet as they hurried down the hallways.

"Don't be a big baby. It is not like you haven't had an inoculation before, Amanda. I will be gentle — I _swear_!"

A cough was heard by both girls as Rosalie made Amanda drop her school bag outside the door of Carlisle's study. "Sorry, Dad. I meant to say that I will be gentle," Rosalie corrected herself. "Or… I will try to be. I've really only done this once before on a live human!" Then she laughed like I was some sort of joke.

Amanda's jaw dropped at that last statement, but before she could complain she was ushered into the room and Rosalie guided her over to Carlisle's desk. Rosalie patted the wood and said, "Hop up!" She had a huge smile on her face that made Amanda stiffen.

"You're scaring me."

"Up you go!" Rosalie didn't take no for an answer, and she picked Amanda up under her armpits and hoisted her effortlessly onto the desk top.

"Hey!" Amanda exclaimed, slapping Rosalie's hands away.

"If you're feeling scared Amanda, or have changed your mind, you are free to do so," Carlisle stepped in, raising an eyebrow at Rosalie. Amanda's heart rate was elevated slightly, signaling some distress on her part.

"Oh, she's fine, Dad!" Rosalie waived away his concern. "Amanda has already agreed that she owes me a few favors, and this is the very least she can do for me."

"Amanda?" Carlisle questioned placing a gentle hand on Amanda's shoulder.

Amanda looked from Rosalie to Carlisle and then back at Rosalie who was giving her the 'do or die' glare. "Ya, fine…Whatever. Let's get this over with then!" she conceded, not happy about it, but she did owe Rosalie. This was better than doing chores or being her personal slave. All she had to do was sit there.

"Very well then," Carlisle agreed and smiled softly in effort to ease Amanda's nerves. "If at any point you are feeling unsure, I will take over."

"Are you talking to me or her?" Amanda asked with a nervous squeak as she pointed to Rosalie.

"Both of you," he answered with a chuckle.

"Seriously you two, it is just a tiny pin prick," Rosalie huffed. "I am insulted!" And her mood was starting to show this — she had lost her cheer and was taking on a more serious tone.

Amanda blanched.

Rosalie had already set up a tiny tray with a hypodermic needle, a vile of vaccine, some cotton swabs, and an alcohol pad. "Now release your arm Amanda!" Rosalie motioned to Amanda, who was hugging her arms to her chest protectively.

"Oh." Amanda looked down and freed herself and let Rosalie take her left arm in her hand. Rosalie pushed up Amanda's sleeve to expose her shoulder, and that was when Amanda started to panic slightly.

Rosalie seemed very confident, that was not the problem. She had just not expected to do this today, at home, in Carlisle's study. She felt a bit uncomfortable as Rosalie's test subject.

Rosalie sensed Amanda's apprehension and rolled her eyes as she slapped a white plastic glove over each hand. She then swabbed the area under Amanda's shoulder with the alcohol. It stank, and Amanda crinkled her nose.

"Tell me about it. You think it smells bad, just imagine what it smells like for me!" Rosalie commented. Amanda was too busy freaking herself out by watching as Rosalie filled up the syringe with the required amount of Hepatitis B vaccine to respond. She could feel her palms getting sticky, and her heartbeat quickened.

"Breathe, sweetie," Carlisle whispered gently as he stood beside Amanda and stroked her right arm with affection. "Perhaps you would prefer not to watch?"

"Maybe I should have filled the syringe before bringing out the tray…" Rosalie thought out loud. She looked to her Dad with a frown, worried she was doing a horrible job already — Amanda's face was still a touch on the pasty side.

Carlisle sat down next to Amanda and wrapped an arm around her. Gently and reassuringly, he commented, "Sometimes I will do that when I am dealing with children or patients I know have a phobia, but Amanda's always been very brave." He smiled as Amanda turned to him. "You did well the last time, honey. This is no different, trust me. Focus on something else and breathe evenly. Rosalie knows what she's doing."

As awkward as it felt for her to let him hold her, his words comforted Amanda. She could understand why Carlisle was so loved by everyone. His presence was very soothing, and he took the time to really care for his patients.

"Of course, I know what I am doing," Rosalie sniffed. The syringe now ready with the appropriate dosage, Rosalie took Amanda's arm in hers to steady it and aimed.

"Wait!" Amanda blurted out, stopping Rosalie in her tracks. Carlisle held up his hand silently to halt Rosalie. "At least count to three so I know when it's coming. Carlisle always counts to three."

Rosalie shot her an impatient look. "Oh, all right! Turn your head and don't pass out on me for goodness sake," Rosalie replied. Then she muttered something under her breath about over-reacting.

Amanda sighed and turned her head into Carlisle's chest. As he cradled her closer, she fought the instinct to pull away from him. She could almost hear what he and Rosalie were discussing and hoped nothing was wrong. She grew nervous waiting, but was soon distracted by her uncles' pleasant scent. Carlisle smelled kind of like cinnamon toast, she decided — sweet and spicy. She almost smiled at the irony of him smelling like something to eat when Rosalie quickly muttered, "One, two, three."

Amanda tensed on reflex, but she had not actually felt anything except for Rosalie's cold hand holding her arm. She curiously peeked to find nothing there and Rosalie disposing of the needle. She inhaled with relief and some color returned to her cheeks.

"See…gentle. You didn't even feel it, did you?" Rosalie said proudly. "And look…No blood — well, that you can see."

Amanda surveyed her arm, her brow furrowed, before speaking. Truthfully, she had not felt a thing and she couldn't even see where the needle had pierced her skin. However, she was still feeling slightly vulnerable. "You need to work on your bedside manner!" she pointedly scolded her conceited cousin.

Carlisle rubbed Amanda's back lovingly and chuckled. "She makes an excellent point, Rose, honey."

Rosalie knew better than to retort, so she listened with tight lips and her arms, now ungloved, folded against her chest.

"You will find it a lot easier to treat people if you treat their emotional needs as well — make them trust you — especially children."

"I'm not a child," Amanda couldn't help but interject, sliding off the desk and pulling her sleeve back down over her arm. Carlisle sighed and nodded, but he couldn't help but smile. She was getting to be so tall. She didn't look as childish anymore — not with the way she dressed with Alice's help. It tugged at his heart to realize she would not remain young forever.

"Rosalie, would you mind stepping out for a bit. I will tidy up for you this time," Carlisle requested. "I would like to have a word with Amanda in private, please."

"Sure," Rosalie replied, and she laughed at Amanda as she exited the study. "Have fun!"

"Uh…" Amanda hummed as the door was closed and she was now face to face with Carlisle. Something was up_. 'Another ambush, perhaps?'_ Amanda decided.

"Have a seat, sweetheart," he told her, motioning to the sofa.

Amanda hesitantly sat down. Carlisle watched her cross her legs and took notice of how mature looking she was for her age. She dressed like Rosalie and Alice, wearing skirts and heels to school with bags and accessories that were pretty to look at, but somewhat unnecessary. Alice was not entirely to blame for this — Amanda was growing up and part of the influence was from media. That is why he felt like what he was about to talk about was important.

"How are you feeling?" he began.

"Fine..." Amanda replied lowly. "I am sorry for freaking out. I was just not sure what to expect with Rosalie and all-"

"I understand," he said, rolling his desk chair close and taking a seat in front of her. "I was actually referring to the other pain you have been feeling these past few days. I know you were quiet upset a few days ago when you began-"

"Oh!" Amanda gasped sharply when she caught on to what he was asking referring to. Blood rushed to her face. "I'm good. No big deal."

"I am glad you have come to terms with the change. It really is a beautiful thing to be a woman and-"

"Okay! Whoa!" Amanda exclaimed quickly. "Please stop talking."

Carlisle sighed and ruffled a hand through his hair. He had been expecting some resistance from Amanda. "I just wanted to be sure that you are aware of everything that your body is going through. Like you said, you are no longer a child and there are certain things you need to know now that you have become a woman."

"Oh, God, kill me!" Amanda moaned, leaning forward into her hands to hide her face. "Somebody, please make him stop!" Her words were muffled, but she hoped someone would hear her plea.

However, Carlisle was persistent. "I have asked everyone to find other things to amuse themselves this afternoon. This discussion is only to inform you of some of things that Rosalie failed to mention when she explained sexual intercourse and reproduction to you the other evening."

Amanda groaned at the very words that were coming out of her uncle's mouth. "I know how babies are made, Carlisle. Please…Let's not do this!"

"I'm sorry if you are uncomfortable, but I am your f- physician," Carlisle stumbled a bit and then continued, "and as such, I am only looking out for your health and safety. I will try to keep this brief, but I expect you to listen carefully to what I am about to say.

"I can't always be there to protect you. It is important that you know you can always come to me, Liz, Esme, or any of the kids if you need advice or want to talk," he told her. "We love you and we only wish the best for you. I know you are young and this conversation many be a few years too soon, but with the amount of sexual promotion in the world today, I want to have it now."

Amanda was no longer blushing. She had reverted back to ashen white as she sickened at the thought of where this conversation might be headed. She couldn't run away from this.

"But I don't even like boys! It is not even an issue!" Amanda begged.

"Yes, you made your opinions very clear this morning about how you feel about sexual intercourse," Carlisle replied.

Amanda shuddered as he said the word _intercourse_ again.

"You are too young to be thinking about having sexual relations at this time, which I am pleased about, but in a matter of years you may start to feel that you are ready, and I want you to be well prepared to handle these…urges."

Amanda moaned again, not being able to keep eye contact with Carlisle any longer. Amanda shut her mouth and waited with a pained expression. She looked at the closed door and longed for an interruption — for Rosalie to come back and stick her with a thousand more needles — anything to discourage her uncle from continuing.

"Rosalie informed you about how wonderful sex can be; the sensations…"

Amanda wished she was dead now. She slapped her hand to her forehead and closed her eyes.

"…the intimacy, the passion that comes along with such a mature adult relationship," Carlisle continued. "However, it is not something that a young, human girl needs to rush into. There are some boys who do not respect women appropriately, and they will be thinking irrationally — usually with a one-track mindset — when they are feeling…urges."

Carlisle spoke carefully, not wanting to embarrass Amanda any more that she was already feeling. He had given this talk to other young girls before, but never to one of his own children since they didn't have to worry about most of the things a human teenager would.

"I know — abstinence, right? I won't have sex 'til I am like, old, okay?" Amanda hurried him along, absolutely mortified.

"Well, that is the safest way to prevent conception or contracting a sexually transmitted disease. So…Yes, please keep that in mind at all times. However…"

"Oh no!" Amanda couldn't believe there was more.

"Did Rosalie talk to you about protection at all?"

Amanda wanted to lie so this would end, but she couldn't. She cringed and shook her head, though she was well aware about what condoms were and how they were used. She was not raised in a bubble, after all.

"I may be a little old fashioned — in my day it was more common to wait until your wedding night to consummate a marriage of two people in love — and I know that the times have changed…"

"Therefore, I want you to be aware that there are many sexually transmitted diseases that should not be made light of. If you do choose to engage in the act of love making before you marry, it is important to know that you and your partner have both been practicing safe sex prior to being with one another. Amanda, I bed of you…Please use protection if you absolutely can't wait until your wedding night."

Amanda's eyes connected with Carlisle's; he was indeed very serious about this.

"I am not one of those doctors who randomly hands out free condoms to teenagers — I don't want to encourage sex. It can be wonderful, like your cousins will tell you — and I can't disagree — but there are dangers if you are not prepared or with the right person."

"Even when you may think you are protected, with any sort of contraceptive, you may still be at risk. If not physically…then emotionally. Until you are a mature young adult who can rationalize motives and feelings and cope with the decisions you make, you are not ready to make love to someone."

Amanda nodded. What he was saying made sense. She hoped he was done now.

"However, if you do decide you are ready — please wait until you are of age, for Heaven's sake — and wait until you are in a monogamous relationship with someone you truly love." Carlisle paused to take a breath for Amanda's sake more than his. He was almost desperate in his lecture. He hoped he was getting his point across to Amanda "Do you know what monogamous means?"

"Uh…" Amanda thought she knew, but couldn't give a definition if she was asked to give one.

Carlisle explained, "It is the commitment between two people to only have sex with one another and no one else — to be sexually exclusive to one another."

"Right…"

"Tell me you understand what I am saying to you."

Carlisle was tired, mentally. He knew that Amanda would not be able to retain too much more of this conversation if he chose to continue. And, he had promised to keep it brief. He watched her silently for a moment. Her eyes were round like saucers as she sat motionless across from him in total stunned mode.

"No sex until I am old and married," Amanda repeated back to him in a robotic voice.

He exhaled and took her hands in his. "As much as we all wish you would stay a child forever, you are growing up. Time seems to go by so quickly for humans, and that might make you eager to rush into things before you are ready, my dear. I just want you to be prepared with knowledge when you are faced with important adult decisions."

He continued, "Don't let others pressure you to do things you are not ready for. There are people in this world who may try to lead you astray — you are so innocent still — but you are the one who ultimately must make the right choices for yourself."

Amanda agreed with a jerky nod. Carlisle smiled warmly at her and kissed her hand.

"Remember, the most important thing is that we all love you and want only the best for you. If you retain anything from this talk, I hope it will be that."

Amanda licked her lips and nodded again.

"Now run along and enjoy the rest of your evening, my dear," Carlisle insisted.

He didn't have to tell her twice. Amanda stood immediately and headed to the door. As she left she heard him rolling his chair back into place behind his desk, so she turned around. He paused and watched her curiously.

She smiled sheepishly and said, "Thanks, Carlisle." To which, he returned with pleased smile.

Amanda didn't wait around to chat more with him. She was too embarrassed she had thanked him at all. She hurried away to go find something to take her mind off the last half hour. The talk had not been quite as bad as she had expected, though, and for that she was very grateful.

* * *

_ I hope you enjoyed the chapter. :) **As far as sex talks go, that was not the worst, right?** Hehe! _

_Oh, and for all you younger teens out there...this was not meant to be a lecture, but we can all learn a thing or two from Carlisle. ;) Hehe.  
_

_**Thank you for reading!**_


	35. Getting to Know You

_Thank you, catharticone, for betaing this chapter. :) _

_This one is a bit on the fluffy side, but I like it! I hope you will too!  
_

* * *

**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Thirty-Five**

|Getting to Know You|

Amanda knocked timidly on the thick, wood door and then held her breath. She was not sure why Carlisle wanted to see her in his office, but she had to guess she had done something wrong. Why else would he want to have her alone in his lecturing room of choice, as Amanda thought of the over-powering library?

"Come in, dear," Carlisle called.

Her heartbeat was a giveaway of anxiety. She turned the knob with her sweaty palm and then wiped it on her pants as she pushed her way in. Her uncle was sitting on in his large recliner, smiling pleasantly.

She feared another lecture on saving herself until marriage. Or worse — a show and tell of sexual organs and reproduction. She scanned the room looking for posters, models, or bananas... She didn't spot anything of this sort, but she was still anxious.

"Relax, Amanda. You are not in any trouble," he told her, holding back his amusement.

"Unless there is something you'd like to tell me that I have yet to find out about."

"Uh…no." The silence was killing her. "So...what's up?" she asked hesitantly.

"I wanted to check in with you and see how you were feeling," he explained. He had noticed she had been in a particularly bad mood —having a very short temper — this morning with her mother at the breakfast table and then again with Alice when the girls had done each other's makeup.

Amanda's brow crinkled and she relaxed slightly. "I'm fine." It was the standard answer.

"I want you to know you can tell me if something is upsetting you."

Amanda was not sure what to tell him. She just stood there watching him warily.

"Of course, it will be confidential. If you would prefer to talk away from the prying ears of others — Alice," he warned.

Alice had been standing in the next room with her ears perked and her breathing stopped to listen better. She sighed and took the hint to get out of the house. Amanda smiled when she heard the front door open and close.

"As I was saying," Carlisle continued, "if you need someone to talk to, I am here...always. We could go out somewhere to chat more privately if you prefer. Or, if you are uncomfortable talking to me, I suppose I could arrange for you to talk to someone else, but you know that you can't be as honest with a stranger as you can with me. Sadly, there are things you cannot tell colleagues of mine without the risk of being declared delusional." He was serious. "For that, I am regretful. It is not fair to you to bear the burden of our family's condition."

Amanda burst out laughing at his sincerity. She was not sure why she found this situation so funny. She had a lot on her mind, but the thought of talking to a shrink had never occurred to her. And now that the option presented itself, it was useless. It was like a nice way of telling her she had no choice in who she could talk to about vampires.

"Is something funny, my dear?" Carlisle didn't understand.

"It's just… so ridiculous!" Amanda was in hysterics, trying to simmer down. Her laughter was silent, but she was not faking. Tears wet her lashes and she wiped them away. "I can't even go to a regular therapist because of this family!"

Carlisle didn't find this funny at all. He was always concerned for Amanda's well-being. He knew she was not leading a normal life because of their secret. "I — I am so sorry. You don't know how sorry I am for all the sacrifices you have to make on a daily basis, Amanda."

His sincerely apologetic admission was enough to smarten Amanda into settling down. She felt sick now that she had calmed. She was left with an empty pit feeling inside her where the emotions had bubbled and escaped as laughter, and all that was left was a despairing ache. She tried to look at her uncle and be serious. His eyes were what really got her. They stared into her so deeply, with such care, she felt horrible for laughing.

"I'm fine," she whispered. It was not what she wanted to say, but she always became fuddled around the handsome doctor. He was the first of the Cullens she had met and he was the one who was first to take care of her when she was hurt or sick. Even though she had always resented his care, she knew he was a good man. "I mean. I just…" She couldn't go on.

"I wish you could…trust me. You can tell me anything and I will always love you," he said softly.

"I know…"

"Do you?" He truly wanted Amanda to love him as he loved her. He didn't want to hold unreasonable expectations, however. Amanda hadn't said 'I love you' to anyone with full sincerity yet, but he was under the impression that she still loathed him, and he didn't know what else he could do to prove to her that he cared for her like she was one of his own.

"I… ya," Amanda stuttered. "I just…can't…I dunno." She felt stupid and looked at her feet.

"It won't get easier unless we try to make the effort to get to know one another."

"You know me," Amanda said. It was not meant to sound petulant. Carlisle got up and his sudden movement startled Amanda and she winced, though he was not moving swiftly at all. His eyes frowned, and she sighed and leaned to sit on the edge of his desk. He patted the wood structure beside him, indicating she should sit next to him. Amanda did just that, leaving a space of about a foot between them.

"I do. I know you very well after more than three years. You have grown so much and changed into such a strong, confident young lady," he began. Amanda smirked and she caught him watching her so she lost it almost immediately. He smiled back. "I don't mean to embarrass you. The point I would like to get at is that I know you, but you still know very little about me." He paused to make sure she was paying attention. When she looked up to meet his face he continued. "That hardly seems fair."

"I know some stuff," Amanda suggested, not wanting him to think she had not thought at all about him in the last three years.

"May I ask what it is you know?" he inquired playfully. He would like to hear what she thought about him. It scared him a little to wait for her to speak — unsure of what she might say.

"Well…I know you like to read about eight different newspapers every morning, that you get specially sent to you from around the world — which is a little bit obsessive, by the way."

Carlisle nodded and waited for more. He couldn't help but smile at how candidly she gave her opinion on his morning ritual.

"You spend every moment you are not helping sick people trying to find new ways to help sick people," Amanda said as her second point. It was true. When he was not at work or with Esme or the kids, he was often doing research. "I think that is nice, but kinda sad since you have worked so hard and still have found no cure for cancer, HIV, diabetes, and all the other diseases you try to solve."

"You noticed that, did you?"

"Well, ya. I do listen, you know," Amanda stated, earning her a fine eyebrow raise from Carlisle. "Not that I understand half the things you say, but I get that what you're doing is important, and I am glad you do it."

"What else do you know about me?" Carlisle pressed her. His heart would have leaped if it still beat. He was impressed with the things she chose to share with him thus far. He had no idea Amanda could be so thoughtful. As he waited to hear more, he had a moment's regret — that he should have tried harder to get Amanda to open up to him before this. However, any sooner and it might not have been the right time.

Amanda was growing more confident and finding that having a conversation with her uncle was not so bad after all. "I noticed that you pronounce every word clearly and you don't ever swear or use slang," she told him, this time rolling her eyes when he agreed with her assessment. "It is kind annoying, just so you know. Makes all the humans feel like morons when you act all perfect and charming!"

"Any one person in particular?" Carlisle countered.

"Uh…well, my art teacher can't even talk about you without drooling all over herself. She went on and on about '_what a generous, giving, handsome man'_ you are when I handed in my scrapbook yesterday," Amanda mocked. "It is disgusting! And she is not that only one who thinks you are so special. People think you are some sort of god because of how talented you are at _your age_! Last week when you saved Brice's dad from having that – I dunno — aneurism thingy in his stomach-"

"Abdominal Aortic Aneurism," Carlisle corrected quietly. He couldn't help himself.

"Whatever," Amanda said dully, watching him with boredom. "The whole town was talking about it. My biology teacher practically hung your photo on the wall in his office. You are, like, his new hero for saving the guy. He said that that kind of aneurism is hardly ever detected in people that age until it is too late and the patient is already dead and being cut open by the dude who – you know — cuts people open when they are dead and stuff."

"Pathologist."

"So not the point! The point is that you are too amazing — too perfect! All the other doctors just starting in their career are idiots according to Mr. Peters, and you never make mistakes so you stand out."

"I wouldn't say they are all idiots," Carlisle said kindly. Amanda sighed impatiently. "Well, what do you suggest I should do differently, Amanda? Not save the man's life to act more like the other physicians? I do try to keep a low profile, but sometimes I can't sit back and let someone's illness progress if I can do something to help them, even it is does seem marvelous and unlikely to others."

"Ya. I guess," Amanda agreed.

"Anything else?" Carlisle asked after a long silence.

Amanda thought and sighed noisily. Then she shrugged, having run out of ideas.

Carlisle let out one, short laugh and his head tipped back in the motion. Amanda stared at him incredulously. Was he mocking her now? She couldn't tell. He sat up straight again and spoke. "Well, no wonder you don't voluntarily engage in conversation with me. If all you know about me is that I read many newspapers, I don't swear, and I take my job seriously," he chuckled, "you must think me a dullard!"

"Well, I didn't say that..." Amanda offered kindly. She had thought up a lot of nasty names for Dr. Cullen over the years, but never thought to call him a dullard.

"Not that those are not a good assessment of me based on those_ few_ traits, but I have been around for nearly four hundred years, Amanda — I think you would be surprised at how much more you could learn about me if you were willing."

"Okay...so try me," Amanda prompted. "And save me from any self deprecating speeches. I don't want to hear about how imperfect you are!"

"I am not self-deprecating," Carlisle commented with a thoughtful look of contemplation.

Amanda rolled her eyes and thought she heard someone else in the house laugh. Carlisle's eyes narrowed, only slightly, and his mouth gaped in genuine surprise for a moment. Then he raised an eyebrow at Amanda. "And how you do even know what that word means?" he asked teasingly. "Your English teacher is under the impression you have not been retaining anything from class — you are always drawing in the margins of your notebooks — but clearly you have retained some impressive vocabulary to better thwart me with."

"Ya, it is my goal in life to be the bane of your existence!" Amanda teased sarcastically.

"I hope you are kidding," he joked with a smile, enjoying himself around Amanda. Her lips twitched and her nose prickled strangely as she tried not to reciprocate the sentiment. He couldn't help but add, "I would hate to have survived centuries of vampire encounters, disease, and war only to meet my demise at the hands of a teenaged girl."

"We'll see..." Amanda couldn't help but add her snarky remark.

Carlisle laughed. "Are you ready?" He asked her, looking at his wrist watch.

Amanda jumped a bit at the change of topic. "Ready for what?"

"Swim practice!" he announced enthusiastically as he stood up.

"I don't have swim practice today. It's _Sat-ur-day_!" Amanda pointed out slowly as if Carlisle were simple. "Holy crap, old man! Have you finally lost your marbles?"

"Funny." Carlisle ruffled the top of Amanda's head with his hand. She reached to swat him, but he was by the door in a flash, holding it open for her. "I thought we could squeeze an extra one in. I booked a lane for us at the pool if you are interested."

"_We_? As in...you_ and_ me?"

He nodded and with a very subtle wink he said, "Keep up, darling."

"You mean... _you_ want to take me swimming?" Amanda was in a state of confusion. This was new. If it had been a couple years ago she would have not considered it. She would have probably said some nasty words that would have sent to her room for the rest of the day. However, she was not nearly as hostile toward Carlisle now so she was very tempted by his offer.

"I can understand if you are tired from last night's practice and you do not want to go," Carlisle broke the silence. She had been thinking for quite a while. His confidence was broken and he was worried she would turn him down. He had such hope that she would take him up on the offer to spend some quality time with him.

"I thought that you might like to get some more practice in since you have another meet coming up next week, though," he included as incentive.

All Amanda could do was gawk at him as he spoke, she was too stunned.

"You did well in Tofino, but I noticed a few things about your technique that you could use some work on."

"What do _you _know?" Amanda asked rudely. She was partly taken aback by the fact that Carlisle had even been watching. He had only come for the last few races on the second day and she didn't recall seeing his face in the bleachers. Though, if he said he noticed her technique, he must have been watching.

Carlisle only smiled, not taking any offense. "I have done my fair share of swimming in my lifetime. If you'd like some pointers I would be happy to work with you. I was looking at the Victoria meet records, and they are impressive for your age division. I would love to see you break a few of them. They have a strong team, but you are stronger. I have no doubt you could get a couple of best times and meet records next weekend if we touch up a few of your strokes!"

Amanda was still and didn't speak for a long stretch as Carlisle waited with the door held open for her. Then she let out her held breath and permitted her hands fall to her sides as she propelled forward. "Okay." _Why not_, she figured.

Carlisle had a huge grin plastered to his face as Amanda slipped by him into the hall. He closed his office door and said, "Great! Let's get going, then." He couldn't be more pleased.

"I have to get my suit on. Meet you in the car in five?" she asked as she hurried down the hall toward her bedroom. She stopped and spun around to get his answer. He nodded, enjoying this moment far too much, Amanda felt. She questioned his motives behind wanting to coach her, but she was not going to turn down the chance for more practice time. She knew he meant well, so she was willing to give this outing a chance!

*

*

*

Amanda had not quite come to grips with Dr. Cullen's offer to take her swimming as she undressed in the ladies changing room. The car ride over had been fairly silent. Sometimes less was more, both of them had felt. They had never done anything recreational together so they were proceeding lightly.

With only her cap and goggles in her hand she kicked off her sandals and shoved her towel in a cubby hole and turned to face the pool. She scanned left and right and could not find Carlisle.

"Amanda!" she heard her name being called. She looked left and right again and then spun around to check behind her. "Over here...in lane three!"

"You're going to be _in_ the pool with me?" Amanda exclaimed as she marched up to the edge of the deck.

Carlisle was half submerged in the crystal blue water, wearing less than she had ever seen him wear.

"Holy crap! You're not wearing Speedos, are you?" She couldn't quite tell with the movement of the water what he was wearing to cover himself.

Carlisle looked down and then back at Amanda with a touch of innocence in his voice and he pushed his wet hair back from on his face. "No... They are the swimming trunks Esme bought me a few years ago."

"Good," Amanda said, just standing there staring at her uncle's nakedness. He was what the older teens would call a hottie. He looked like he had walked off a billboard from one of those Calvin Klein underwear advertisements — only with less of a tan. Still...the muscles in his arms, chest, and abdomen were clearly showcased.

"Amanda..."

"You're ripped, Carlisle!" she blurted out, flabbergasted. Then she blushed and felt like an idiot. "I mean...You're just so...young looking...without the sweater vest."

Carlisle laughed. "Thank you, I think. Now, hurry up and hop in. I want you to warm up first and stretch a bit before we really get started."

Amanda sighed and sank down to sit on the edge of the pool with her legs dipped into the water. She twisted her hair up and shoved it inside her swim cap. "I don't think I have even seen you without long sleeves before," she stated as she put her goggles on, still in shock. Then she hopped into the pool and made a face as her warm skin felt the lukewarm water.

"I usually play it conservative. It does feel strange being so...exposed," Carlisle said as he caught the female life guard on duty staring at him. He sank down so his bare chest was immersed in the water.

"Can I just do whatever I want for warm up?" Amanda changed the topic.

"Free stroke, three hundred meters," Carlisle answered. "I will take lane four until you've completed the set."

And he did. Amanda was halfway down to the deep end when she saw him glide by her at an impressive, but not inhuman speed — though his arms hardly had to pull and his legs were barely kicking. She gawked and water filled her mouth and she spat it out hastily as she turned to take a breath. She couldn't keep her eyes off him, however, as she swam the twelve lengths of the pool. Finally, back at the start she caught up to him.

"What the hell, Carlisle? You can swim!"

"Watch your language," he reminded in a hushed voice. The lifeguard was hovering needlessly on the pool deck. "Yes, of course I can swim."

"Well, you never said you could swim. I never heard of a v- ...one of you guys swimming before! Not like that — it was like you were made of air!" Amanda marvelled. Then she whispered. "I kinda thought you would sink like a stone."

Carlisle nodded at her rational conception and smiled. "We may be hard as rock, but surprisingly agile. We really are a complicated species. If you are ever interested in some of the research I have conducted-"

"Whoa! Don't get too excited. I am not interested in anything educational having to do with _that stuff_, thank you very much." She absolutely hated to talk about anything supernatural.

"Oh, alright, but if you ever want to know something I would like for you to come to me. You shouldn't-"

"I know," Amanda interrupted. "I have to be _discrete_! No snooping for info because _they_ are watching!"

Carlisle knew she meant the Volturi. She had been warned about the seriousness of keeping a low profile since Aro was letting her live as a personal favor to Carlisle. Any screw-ups and the Cullen family would be put in danger.

There was a long pause of dreary silence as they both considered the consequences of Amanda spilling their secret.

Amanda changed the topic once more. "Okay, we're here — now teach me all your swimming wisdom!" Carlisle watched her for a long moment and then with a raise of an eyebrow Amanda added, "Please," to her demand.

*

*

*

An hour later, Amanda was still soaking up every piece of advice Carlisle could give her on where to place her arms, when to breathe, how far she should let her streamline take her, and so much more that her coaches had mentioned, but had never taken the time to really show her.

"A lot of the speed comes when you move smoothly. I have often noticed that swimmers try to move their arms too fast and it works against them unless they can keep their rhythm smooth," he had told her. "Don't breathe every three strokes. If you are swimming two lengths you could cut it down to every five or seven if you concentrate! The less you interrupt your body from its streamline figure, the better."

Amanda was thrilled with all this. She had often felt that the coaches were not pushing her enough. Her uncle was surprisingly forceful when it came to his lessons — pushing her to do new things even when it didn't feel quite right. Amanda didn't question him at all until he suggested the last exercise.

"I can't do _that_! I need air to live, remember?"

"You can come up for air if you are desperate, Amanda, but I don't want you to. The purpose of this set it to help your lung capacity. If you can learn to depend less on breathing and more on agility for short periods of time, you will increase your speed."

Amanda looked to the other end of the pool and then back at her uncle warily. "The _whole _way without coming up for air?" She repeated what he had already told her a few minutes ago. He wanted her to swim underwater, not breaking the surface until she reached the wall at the other end. Amanda had done it before a few times in her life — just to see if she could — but not during a set when she was already worn out.

He nodded. "And then sprint back as fast as you can, taking as few breaths as you can manage."

"That's crazy; we don't even do things like this during hell week!"

Carlisle smirked. "You will thank me later. Now, leave on the red top. You can have a minute to rest in between each." She had to do four of these in a row. Amanda scowled, but Carlisle just pointed to the large wall clock. She rolled her eyes and heaved a dramatic sigh before she left the wall when the red hand hit zero.

It was like her chest was about to cave in as she reached the deep end and continued to kick and pull under the water to get to the wall, which seemed so out of reach she thought she might pass out and die. It was not like Carlisle would be mad at her if she came up for air before the wall, but he seemed so sure that she could make it without, that Amanda was determined not to disappoint. Finally, in what felt like a victory, she touched the wall and clung to it as she came up for air. She gasped and sucked in a breath, still clinging to the wall.

"Good job, Amanda! Come back right away. You can do it!" Carlisle cheered from the other end, where he had stayed put.

"Oh my God!" Amanda panted and she reluctantly pushed off and sprinted back, going halfway until she took her first breath and then a few more as she reached the shallow end and stopped at the wall. She hung over it with her head on her arms, breathing heavily.

"That was great! You see? You can do it! Now get ready for the next one. You have until the green top!"

Amanda shook her head. "No!" She didn't see how she could go on when she was so utterly spent already after doing the exercise once.

"Three more and then warm down," he insisted.

Amanda wanted to refuse, but she couldn't seem to convince Carlisle that she was not going to be able to do any more. She had every intent on not leaving on the green top, but for some reason when it came time she did what he told her and found herself repeating this torturous pattern over and over until she was sprinting back for the fourth time, her chest burning and her face so hot the water felt like ice as it swished passed her.

As soon as she was within a few strokes width from the wall she stood up and gasped, her exhaustion getting the best of her. She had come so far and she had stood up only a few feet from the finish. This realization made Amanda feel like a failure. Her arms and legs ached and each breath felt like knives stabbing at her lungs. She was fed up and annoyed with herself, as she hastily pulled her cap and goggles off and put them on the edge as she leaned into it. A loud sob choked her, and she gasped again as tears fell.

Carlisle was at her side in an instant and he laid his hand on her back and leaned over her protectively. "You did well, Amanda."

"It hurts!" she cried out, angry with him, but she didn't even have the energy to sound upset. It sounded more like a plea.

"I know, darling. It was quite the exercise for your lungs. The feeling will pass — just breathe," he hushed her soothingly. "Nice slow breaths and try to relax. You have a warm down to do so your heart rate will slow more comfortably. How about you swim one hundred meters backstroke? Nice and easy. It will help." He eased her onto her back and she complied, though she was still very much out of breath as she began reaching back to propel herself. "Off you go!"

And after a few laps of lazily swimming on her back to and from the walls, Amanda began to feel the ease on her chest and she calmed down.

"How are you doing, sweetheart?" Carlisle asked as she finished her warm down and stood to gathered her cap and goggles. She was quiet now and he thought maybe he might have pushed her too hard. "Your heart rate is slowing nicely and your breathing is nice and even. You should be feeling better now."

"Ya," Amanda nodded.

"I didn't mean to make it so difficult for you. I only wanted to help you — to show you what you are capable of if you are faced with a challenge."

Amanda sighed and dunked her head in the water to get her hair to flow out of her face, and then she stood again and wiped her eyes. "I was just so...so...tired and I couldn't catch my breath. It kinda scared me."

"I understand. It will get easier next time — you'll see — and soon you will find you need to breathe less in those short periods of time."

Amanda looked at him disbelievingly. "_Next _time?"

"I hope so. I enjoyed our time together," Carlisle responded with a toothless grin. "If you want to do this again sometime, that is..."

"I do..." Amanda said shyly, then she hesitated, "...but not that last set! I thought I was going to die!"

Carlisle agreed, chuckling lightly at Amanda's dramatization. He patted her on the back saying, "Good work, today," and he got out of the pool. He ignored the few people who stopped what they were doing to get a good look at him as he reached for Amanda's hand and hoisted her out of the water onto the deck.

He smirked and said, "You just wait until you swim in at the meet next weekend. If you use what you learned today in your races — smooth down your stroke and breathe less — you will gain so much more power it is possible for you to shed seconds off your time."

"Ya?" Amanda tried to sound hopeful, but she was worn out as she walked towards the change rooms with Carlisle by her side. She had gotten over him in a swim suit, but noticed when she looked back at the pool that no one was swimming — most of them were watching her uncle or pretending that they had not just been looking at him.

"Yes! That was amazing what you did today and that at the end of practice. Imagine how well you will do on meet day! You will be practicing those sprints voluntarily once you see how much they will help your races."

Amanda cringed at the thought of having to do that set again, but she couldn't help but smile. She was feeling rather proud of herself now that the whole ordeal had passed. "Maybe..."

"That's the spirit! Now, hurry and get dressed. I will meet you in the car in fifteen minutes so no dawdling in the showers today."

"I don't dawdle!" Amanda rebuffed, taking her towel out of the cubby hole.

Carlisle laughed. "I have picked you up from practice before, Amanda. You are usually in there for a long time, with the showers running."

"Well...they are so nice and warm and it feels good," she admitted with a longing grin.

"Fifteen minutes," her uncle repeated and he bowed his head and then ducked into the men's changing room, happy to be out of the limelight and away from gawking eyes.

*

*

*

It was nearly five by the time they got back to the car and headed towards home. Amanda was silent for a moment and then she blurted out, "I miss Tyler."

She waited for Carlisle to answer and when he didn't right away she turned to check out his expression. It was one of compassion and empathy.

"I know you do," he replied peacefully.

"It is his birthday today... that is why I was acting a bit grumpy." It hurt to admit the truth — to share her feelings with anyone, let alone Dr. Cullen — but she felt a weight lifted off her chest now that she had spoken. She sunk down in her seat feeling ashamed for being so weak.

"Thank you for telling me, Amanda."

"I just wish I could tell him that I'm sorry. He probably hates me for not ever calling him."

"Tyler was a good friend to you. He deserves to know why you had to leave," Carlisle began. Amanda sniffed, feeling the emotion starting to get the better of her again. "It was unfortunate what happened that Christmas. I wish I knew a way for you to go visit Tyler without risking our family's safety — your own safety. I would take you back to Kipta right now if it were possible to do so, please believe me."

"I do."

"There is not one day that goes by that I wonder if what we did — changing Liz so abruptly, stealing you away to Alaska, taking you away from your home and your friends-"

"Friend," Amanda corrected sorrowfully. She had only had one human friend.

Carlisle continued patiently, "I often consider what we — what I did — and wonder if it was a mistake to take you into our family."

The words stung a bit, though Amanda had always thought that she was a mistake and not worthy to be part of anyone's family. It was harder to hear Dr. Cullen say the words to her, though. Suddenly, she felt his finger under her chin and he lifted it up. She turned to him as he pulled off the road.

"Do you know what conclusion I come to every day..." he asked her gently, pausing briefly to glance over at Amanda, "...when I think about what our life would be like if you were not in it?"

Amanda shook her head meekly, her eyes locked on his.

"I think about how much we would have missed out on if we had never met you. How dreary and sad our days were before we had you to brighten them. It gets so lonely having to hide from the world, Amanda. Once we had you we started to come to life again."

There was a nice silence where they both smiled at each other.

Then, instead of getting back onto the route home, Carlisle pulled into an unfamiliar drive-through. The red and white sign above caught Amanda's attention, and she looked at her uncle curiously.

"Would you like some ice cream?" he offered.

"Seriously?" Amanda inquired. This was new too. "Aren't you worried it will ruin my dinner?" That was the line she always received when she asked any of her family members for sugary treats.

"I won't tell if you won't," Carlisle winked as he pulled up to the window and rolled down his window. "What would you like, my dear?"

Amanda beamed and decided not to argue. Speaking loudly so the woman inside the building could hear her, she said, "Hot fudge sundae, please!"

"Do you want any extras added onto your sundae?" the young girl in the window asked.

"Uh..." Amanda hummed, checking with Carlisle first if that would be okay.

He smiled, knowing Amanda well, and he said to the girl, "Yes, extra chocolate, please."

* * *

_It was about time those two got along, eh? What did you think of Carlisle and Amanda's day together? I know there were some cheesy parts, but I could have made it more cliche with the 'swim to France' line and I held back! That took a lot of restraint on my end. Are you proud of me? ;) _

**_Thanks for reading! _**


	36. Green Monster

_Thank you Catharticone, for being beta on WOL. I really appreciate your help. :)_

* * *

**Worthy of Love**

**Chapter Thirty-Six**

|Green Monster|

The week of sunshine had passed by, and the Cullen kids were back in school now that clouds had returned to the Island. It seemed to have put them all in a glum mood. Regardless, they all returned to their everyday, mundane, human act as expected of them.

Rosalie had quite enjoyed her time off from school to study with Carlisle. They had locked themselves up in his office for days going over techniques for taking vitals on human patients without hurting them. Amanda was her new guinea pig of sorts, being called in as a practice patient for Rosalie to poke at. Amanda was fed up with having her vitals checked every time she walked into the same room as Rosalie. She put her foot down when Rosalie wanted to try drawing blood to run some lab tests. There was no way she was going to voluntarily give her blood to a vampire, family or not! Rosalie was disappointed, but she remained positive that she would talk Amanda into it eventually.

Alice had been in a foul mood for days, however. It was starting to be a problem when Jasper was not around to comfort his mate. If he was not in the same room, she was a wreck. Only Amanda seemed to notice, though.

Alice stormed through the school hallway, neatly dodging the human children, as she made her way towards her cousin. It was lunch, and as usual they would be going to the stairs that lead to the Drama room in the basement. This is where Alice and Amanda usually spent their lunchtime. It was private enough that Alice didn't have to constantly pretend to eat, and Amanda wasn't stared at for being seen with Alice who was a tiny bit intimidating for her small size.

Amanda had left her History class, one of her classes she did not have with her cousin. Susie was in that class with her, and Amanda approached her about a study date they had arranged after swim practice. She wanted to make sure it was still on. It was, Susie's mother insisted. Susie apologized for her mother repeatedly, but she did admit she was glad Amanda was coming over. So, Amanda made a decision to do a little inviting on her own.

"Hey Aly!" she greeted Alice. "Whoa! What is with your face?" Alice was not smiling. In fact, Alice looked peeved. It was not something Amanda was used to seeing.

"Oh, I don't know…maybe it is reacting to the way I am feeling inside! Hurt. Confused. Betrayed!" Alice announced rather dramatically, enumerating her feelings on her fingers. Amanda could only stare unblinkingly at her tiny cousin, who looked harmless most days, but now looked rather alarming in her slightly Goth appearance.

"I'm…sorry?" Amanda guessed. That was not the right response. Without Jasper beside her to calm her down, Alice was a scary little monster.

"You don't even know what you did?" Alice asked incredulously. She glared at Amanda, standing so close that they were practically touching. Any other human would have been afraid. Amanda knew she was in no real danger, but she was a bit surprised that Alice was upset with her. That was usually very hard to accomplish. Alice was Amanda's cheerleader most times.

"I'm still sorry. Please stop snarling at me. You'll freak people out!" Amanda whispered, looking around to make sure no one was watching. It was amazing how self-absorbed the other kids were. In a hallway crowded with students, not one seemed to notice the angry vampire.

"How could you?" Alice inquired.

Amanda was still staring unblinkingly. Her mouth dropped and she shrugged. "I still don't know what I did!" she exclaimed loudly.

"You invited that Susie girl to eat with us on the stairs. You know… where you eat and I don't have to pretend to eat?!" Alice ranted, hushing her voice to not prevent eavesdroppers.

Amanda understood now. "Oh," she said, her mouth forming a perfect 'O'.

"Don't deny it. I saw when you decided to invite her! I assume you already went through with it because Susie is in the girl's bathroom now giving herself a pep talk!" Alice announced, but not too loudly. She didn't want Susie's name to be overheard. The poor girl had it hard enough, what with her already low self-esteem.

"I'm not denying it," Amanda answered, "I did invite her, but only becau-"

"Well, if you didn't want to eat with me you should have just said so. You can just go eat with all the other humans!" Alice whispered harshly.

She was concerned that if Amanda made human friends they would exclude her from their activities and she would no longer be as close with Amanda. She had seen bad things flickering in Amanda's future lately and wanted to keep her cousin close to her for safety's sake.

"It is not like that, Aly. I want you to eat with us, too. I just forgot you don't eat, that's all! I'm sorry!"

"You still should have run this by me first! We are best friends, after all! I have a bad feeling about this Susie…"

"What? Why?" Amanda was confused. "She is just some science nerd who needs some friends. Have you seen her? She could really use our help, fashion-wise!"

Alice smirked, liking that angle. "True. However, I think we need to be cautious around her…"

"She can't even swim in a straight line, Alice. I don't think she is a threat!" Amanda teased.

Alice smiled. She had no concrete proof that Susie was the change in Amanda's life that was making her future flicker like a delicate flame caught in a draft. She couldn't really justify making Amanda stay away from the girl.

"Fine," she murmured. "I don't like it, though. We usually talk about these things first."

"I know. I really am sorry. Don't be mad. Susie eats alone in Mrs. Gripp's classroom every day — no joke. She has no one else to spend the lunch hour with… I had to ask her to join us. It seemed wrong not to!" Amanda begged for forgiveness. She honestly had not seen Alice reacting this way.

Alice's expression softened. What Amanda said about Susie eating in a teacher's classroom alone had touched her. She would feel guilty if she denied the girl some companionship. After all, she knew what it was like to have no friends at school. Kids were mean, and before Amanda Alice didn't have any friends outside her family.

"You can just say you aren't hungry. Susie won't notice. Please don't be angry," Amanda begged, pouting prominently to make Alice give in to her. That gesture usually worked on Alice, who only wanted to the best for Amanda most of the time.

"I am not angry. She can _eat_ with us," the little, black-haired vampire gave in.

Amanda hugged Alice, whose head pressed against Amanda neck due to the fact Alice was still a lot shorter in height, even with heels.

Alice giggled and pushed Amanda away as she noticed the scent of blood pulsing though her cousin. "You tease! I could stand to _feed_ too, you know!"

Amanda smiled sheepishly. "Sorry, Aly."

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The day had gone by rather uneventfully. Alice had been civil during lunch, but Amanda sensed her resentment toward Susie. Luckily, Susie didn't seem to pick up on it. She was just elated to have people to spend the lunch hour with.

Swim practice came and went in a blur, Amanda only being kicked once by her motor-function challenged friend — no black eye this time!

Amanda was just finishing up in the change room. She had on her pajamas under a pair of loose sweatpants that read, 'Swimming' across the bum. Alice loathed these pants, but Amanda thought they were comfortable, and that was the point, so she wore them anyway. She slipped on her winter coat and slung her duffle bag over her shoulder then headed out.

Susie had pretty much shied away from her after she had made the corny mention of friendship to her during practice. Amanda decided not to push the girl. If Susie didn't want her as a friend then she was not going to beg.

Esme was waiting inside the doors of the Rec Center. She looked stunning in a black wool coat with a dark-brown wolverine fur collar. It was a princess cut and tied at the waist where there were two medium sized buttons, and the cuffs on the sleeves were folded over and buttoned the same. If Amanda didn't know Esme, she would be staring like the other parents and swimmers who were passing by. Esme didn't seem to notice. She smiled lovingly at Amanda.

"How was your swim, darling?"

"Good," Amanda replied and didn't stop as she walked towards the door. Esme kept the pace and placed her arm around Amanda's shoulder as they made their way outside. "Nice coat by the way!" Amanda complimented, but her tone hinted that the style was out of date. Esme really did look like a movie heroine from the fifties at the moment, what with her hair in perfect, soft finger waves and rolled under at the ends.

"Thank you. This was mine when I was just a young girl. I am most pleased it still fits and the materials have held up after all these years. It really is a beautiful coat. It is Alice approved, just you do know," Esme said, laughing lightly.

Amanda smiled. Even though her family members often stood out, she could never say that the embarrassment she felt was because of their poor appearance or reputation. It was nice to be a part of a reputable family for a change. Her mother and Donna Combs were nowhere near classy at the best of times.

"Yooohoo!" A shrill voice sang out to get both Esme's and Amanda's attention.

They stopped outside Esme's silver Audi and turned to see a tall, thin woman dressed in tight pink pants and a puffy, white parka. She had blonde hair, but an inch of dark brown roots showing, and garish, pink lipstick and blue eye shadow on her face. She jogged up and stopped short. "Hi! I'm Barb Bloom, Susie's mom," she explained.

Esme smiled pleasantly and looked at Amanda fondly, assuming Susie was a friend. "Esme Cullen," she introduced herself and held out a gloved hand to shake Barbara Bloom's hand. "It is nice to meet you." Susie shyly walked up behind her mom, looking like she wanted to disappear.

"It is so nice to finally meet you," Barb stated, smacking on some gum like she was some valley high teen from the eighties. She clearly thought she was still a young girl, just by her dress and her attitude. "And you must be Amanda! Susie has told me only nice things about you! She tells me you're quite the speedy swimmer!"

"Uh…ya. Hi," Amanda answered modestly. Susie was looking at the ground.

"Well, I don't want to keep you. You probably have to get home for dinner. I just wanted to stop by and introduce myself and invite Amanda over to our house tomorrow night for dinner after they study. That is…if that is okay with you, Esme?" Barb asked. "The girls have some sort of Science lab to do, isn't that right, Susie?" She smiled and nudged her daughter. Susie nodded.

Amanda was not sure what to say. She didn't want to go. She hardly knew Susie, and her mother appeared to be Hooker Barbie judging by appearance. However, it was true, they had planned to complete a lab report together since they were partners on that project, and it would help to have extra time to work on it together.

"That is very kind of you to offer. Amanda, what do you say?" Esme said.

"Uh, ya. That sounds good," Amanda replied.

Barb shrieked and clapped her hands like a giddy child. "Great! Then I will pick the girls up from practice tomorrow and they can eat and study over at our place. What time is Amanda allowed to be out until on a school night?"

Esme was surprised the woman asked. She didn't strike her as a mom too concerned with rules like curfew, though it was wrong to judge a woman she only just met moments ago. "Oh, I am not sure. I suppose no later than eight. If you want to give me your address and phone number now I will pick her up at-"

"Oh, no no. I will drive her home when the girls are done with their schoolwork. No problem. We live down the road a bit from your home. My ex worked on the roofing when it was built, actually. So I know the location."

"That is kind of you to drive her. Perhaps I could have your phone number and address anyhow, just in case plans change or if — Heaven forbid — an emergency arises," Esme insisted gently, pulling out her wallet with a pen and paper tucked inside. Barb happily wrote down her information for Esme and handed back the pen.

"Alright, then. See you tomorrow after practice, Amanda. Oh, it is so nice that you two have made friends!" Barb exclaimed.

Amanda was confused at how she had gotten roped into this whole thing, but she smiled and nodded gingerly. Susie lifted her hand to wave good-bye, still looking mortified by her mother. Barb nudged her daughter with her elbow sharply.

"Bye, Amanda," Susie peeped.

"Ya. See you in class tomorrow," Amanda replied. She put her hand on the Audi's handle to signify she was ready to leave.

"Nice meeting you, Barb," Esme sang in the most elegant tone.

Barb smacked her gum loudly and nodded. "Ya. You too! Come on, Susie."

Then they turned and walked away to get into a little, green Volkswagen. It looked to be twenty years old at least, and it had bumper stickers galore on the entire back bumper. The car boomed to life, and dark grey smoke puffed from the exhaust when it powered up and peeled away.

Amanda tossed her swim bag in the back seat and then climbed into the front, passenger side seat of the brand new silver Audi and closed the door. Esme was already sitting in the driver's seat, and when she turned on the engine it barely made a sound.

/

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After she ate, Amanda had to endure a few minutes of Alice giving her the silent treatment for making afterschool plans that didn't involve her. "Seriously, Aly…it was not up to me. We were ambushed!" It was her new favorite word since last week when Rosalie had attacked her with a needle and Carlisle had surprised her with a preemptive sex talk. _'Thank goodness that is over,'_ Amanda thought.

"Oh, darling. It was hardly an ambush. I think it is nice that you are making new friends at school," Esme added her take on the invitation. Amanda was at the table, writing out definitions from her History class textbook. She had a quiz on the terms the next day. She looked up and stared incredulously at her aunt.

"Ya! So nice you're making _new _friends!" Alice repeated, still pouting, this time a bit on the playful side, though she remained troubled by the blind spots in her visions.

Amanda laughed at Alice for making such a big deal about it.

"No need for me any more when you can be friends with _Susie_." Alice twisted the name unpleasantly.

"It is not like that, Aly. I tried to be nice to her, but she is…weird…or something and she doesn't seem to want to be friends. That is why I am surprised her mom came over and invited me to their house."

"She is shy, Amanda," Esme stood up on Susie's behalf.

"With a mom like that — no wonder!"

"Amanda," Esme said her name lowly, and shook her head. Amanda was surprised her aunt was wagging a finger at her. That was the look Esme had in her eyes.

"What? Her mom yells things at her when we are at practice. It is so annoying. Susie hates swimming, by the way. Her mom is like…I dunno…some _crazy_, dictator lady telling her what to do!"

Alice giggled at Amanda's strong words.

Esme did not seem as amused. "I think it is sweet she wants you to come over. You need a nice, human friend. It will be good for you," Esme cooed thinking of how much Amanda had grown and all the milestones she was hitting at this age.

"The lady actually said yoohoo. She's not normal!" Amanda justified her reason for thinking Barbara Bloom was a little strange.

Esme just gave her a look, but didn't argue that fact.

"I don't like you spending time with that Susie. There is something about her that is off!" Alice stated her piece sharply. Amanda wasn't sure what that meant, but they didn't dwell on it, seeing as Alice was acting like a jealous brat…again.

Amanda was feeling pretty good, in spite of Alice's sudden neediness, which troubled her slightly. She was not going to admit it, but she was kind of happy that Susie was somewhat interested in being her friend. It would be nice to have someone her own age and human to talk to sometimes. She smiled at the thought, and she continued to copy out the definitions from her textbook onto her paper.

Alice sighed, getting up from her seat at the table. "You don't need help with your homework, do you?" she asked Amanda routinely. Amanda shook her head, no.

Without another word, Alice was gone. No one else seemed to be worried that Alice was acting oddly.

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The next day at swim practice…

"Your cousin is really…pretty," Susie piped up as they were stretching on deck before practice. Lunch had been awkward. Susie had hardly spoken a word, what with Alice chattering away in her usual cheer.

"Ya… All of my cousins are good looking. It is kind of annoying." Amanda tried to make light of her unusual family. Susie was not making accusations, but she still didn't want to give her reason to.

"You are just a pretty as she is, though," Susie said a bit hesitantly. But she sounded sincere.

Amanda laughed as she bent down to touch her right foot. "Hah! Ya, right!"

"You are," Susie said gently, seriously.

"Well…thanks," Amanda mumbled, not sure how to take the compliment. "You should see my other cousin, Rosalie. She is, like, supermodel pretty! I look like troll next to her, I swear!" The self-deprecation didn't feel right coming from her mouth. She decided to change topics. "Anyway, I am glad we are going to get the lab done tonight. It will get my uncle off my back. He wishes I was smarter like his kids, but I never seem to do very well. If I don't do well in school they won't let me swim, so it's kinda like blackmail."

Susie nodded lightly, agreeing with Amanda. "That sounds like my mom… Only, she doesn't care how I do in class. She just wants me to be sporty like she was when she was my age. She thinks it will help make me more popular and less of a geek."

"She told you that?" Amanda asked, shocked. "You aren't a geek." It even sounded like a lie.

Susie nodded as she gave a shrug. "Ya, I kinda am, but it's okay… I am fine with it. I think my mom is trying to relive her youth through me. She dresses like a teenager and she tries to be so cool. It is so embarrassing. I wish she would just be a regular mom, you know?" Susie shared.

Amanda nodded sympathetically.

"Like your mom. She seemed great!" Susie exclaimed. Her cheeks blushed when she saw Amanda's stunned face.

"Oh, Esme is not my mom," Amanda explained. She knew why Susie would have thought that. First of all, Esme was the only woman to ever pick her up from swim practice and second, Amanda looked a lot like her biological grandmother. However, she knew she needed to lie — it was expected of her. "She's my aunt."

"Oh. Wow…I could have sworn she was your mom. You look so much like her."

"I know… I get that a lot. She was my dad's sister," Amanda continued to fib.

Susie's face fell a bit. "Was?" she asked cautiously.

"Uh…ya," Amanda replied, she hung her head and bit her lip. She never got the chance to meet Elizabeth's husband before he died. She felt horrible talking about him as though she knew him. "He died when I was eight," she said sadly.

"It's just me and mom, too," Susie shared; her eyes looked for something else to focus on. Amanda was quiet, not knowing how to respond. Susie felt she had done something wrong. "I'm sorry," she apologized, blushing more than ever. "I didn't mean to-"

"No. It's okay. Don't worry about it. It was a long time ago. Eli—, er…my mom and I live with my uncle and aunt now. Sorta like one big family," Amanda said.

Amanda was feeling oddly sick to her stomach over the conversation. She needed, badly, to change the subject. "So, anyway…I am sorry you got stuck with me as a lab partner since I don't know anything about reaction rates and blah blah blah…" Amanda said and rolled her eyes.

Susie smiled. "Oh, I don't mind," she said, standing tall to stretch her arm. Her cheeks were still pink. "I mean…I am glad you're my partner. I usually have to do homework alone. The company will be nice for a change."

"I hope you don't care that I have no idea how to do the lab. Reaction rates or something…I tried to read the lab, but I got lost in all the science words!" Amanda was much more of a literature fan. Math and Science were too strict.

"It's easy. We are just making graphs of the results we got in the lab today and then summarizing our findings. I will show you what to do," Susie replied, confident for once.

Amanda smiled kindly as she swung her arms around in the air.

Susie perked up and added, "Oh, my mom said we could have whatever we want for dinner. I suggested nachos. Is that okay?"

"I think so! I have never had them. It sure sounds good, though," Amanda agreed. She may have had nachos as a young child, but not that she could recall. Elizabeth had never made junk food meals when she lived with her briefly in Kipta, and Esme was not the kind of woman who made such amateur food. She had recipe books from decades ago that didn't include pizza, macaroni and cheese, or nachos.

"You've never had nachos before?" Susie inquired with surprise. Her mom was not a cook. Barbara Bloom knew how to heat things up like a pro, so Susie was no stranger to canned soup, fish sticks, McCain fries, and nachos. The one and only thing Ms. Bloom did make fresh was salsa.

"Nope. I like cheese, though!" Amanda answered with a smile.

"Good. I like lots of cheese on mine, too. Mom makes good nachos. She even makes homemade salsa. It is really good with sour cream, too!" Susie shared. She was beaming now, not as shy as before. She was happy. That happiness faded as the coach came out and announced stretching was over.

"Okay, everybody in! Two hundred warm-ups then read the board for your first set. Go! Go! Go!" Dan called out loudly. Amanda bent down to pick up her cap and goggles and picked up Susie's as well and passed them to her.

"Thanks," Susie peeped, trying not to look at the bleachers.

Susie's mom waved obnoxiously from the side of the deck as they made their way to the edge of the pool. Amanda raised her hand to be polite just as Susie ducked her head and sloppily splashed into the shallow end.

Amanda sat on the edge, slipped her cap on and then placed her goggles on over top before she gently slipped into the cool water. It felt nice. She put her goggles on and did a little dive to get her started, then she began her warm-up. She smiled as she swam, actually excited to be going over to her new friend's house. Susie was not as lame as she thought — she was just shy.

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Amanda and Susie made it through practice without any more black eyes.

Susie had to endure, yet again, her mother instructing her from the sidelines. The coach didn't like it either, but he didn't dare argue with Barb Bloom, who looked like a woman who could win a scrap fight. She was nice enough to Amanda, however.

"Wow, Amanda!" Barb cheered as both girls piled into the back seat of the Blooms' punch buggy. "A thirty-six in practice! Is backstroke your best stroke?"

"Uh…not really," Amanda answered shyly. At the end of practice they had done some fifty-meter times prints, and Amanda's time was impressive for her age and for the fact it was swum after a long workout.

"Well, you are going to break some records if you swim like that or better at the meet coming up! The division three, fifty-meter backstroke time to beat is thirty-five seconds!" Barb trilled as she drove out of the parking lot on to a main road.

Amanda smiled without her teeth, trying to be modest, but inside she was happy to have learned that. Her best time was thirty-three; though she had not beat that the last few meets she swam, but she was sure she could swim less than thirty-five.

"You're really fast," Susie mumbled quietly in hopes her mother would not harp on her for not being as good as Amanda.

No such luck. "You should get Amanda to help you with your strokes, Suze!" Barb suggested. "If you could manage to better your technique I think you would pick up some speed as well."

"Sure, Mom. Amanda already said she'd help me," Susie said at a whisper. Amanda agreed with a head nod.

Barb didn't harp on Susie. She turned the music up and danced a bit as she drove down the long stretch of road that led past the Cullens' house. A few minutes more down the road was Sproat Lake RV Park. Ms. Bloom turned in there, and in the far left of the park was a white, rectangular trailer. It was clean, but a little bit banged up from age. It had a string of multi-colored mini lights blinking through the front window. _'Probably left up from Christmas,' _Amanda thought.

"It's not much, but it is cozy. Right, Suze?" Barb announced as they exited the vehicle and made their way inside.

Susie didn't answer. She was blushing, yet again. She was embarrassed by the tiny mobile home. She knew that the houses on the lake were all million-dollar homes. She assumed Amanda would think less of her for what she and her mother had.

She didn't know that Amanda had jumped from trailer to basement suite to duplex numerous times because her own mother would always end up getting into arguments with the landlord over rent payments. Amanda was not uncomfortable being in small living spaces. The Blooms' trailer was small, but it was clean and it was warm — two things that had been lacking from Amanda's childhood homes before meeting Elizabeth and the Cullens.

The table and four chairs in the corner of the main living space were cleared off, and Susie put her school bag on one of the chairs, so Amanda did the same thing. Barb went to work in the open kitchen and said, "Dinner will be ready in about fifteen minutes, girls. I just have to heat up the nachos in the oven."

"Thank you, Ms. Bloom," Amanda replied politely, remembering her manners that both Liz and Esme had tried to instill in her.

"Oh, aren't you just the most precious child? How about you call me Barb…or Barbie works too. I used to be called Barbie all the time in school. Gosh, you two don't know how lucky you are…" Barb chatted away about her youth as she worked with her back towards the girls.

Susie ignored her mother and took out some of her graph paper. Amanda followed her lead. Barb continued to talk into the air as she clanked around in the kitchen. Amanda copied what Susie was doing, making a graph with colored markers. Susie's turned out a lot neater and better looking.

"Uh…you have to label X and Y," Susie explained, looking over to Amanda's paper.

"Oh,"

"The X is the horizontal line. The Y is the vertical line," Susie explained further.

Amanda still looked slightly confused. It was not as if she hadn't heard that before, but, '_What was X and what was Y?' _she wondered.

"X is going to be the rate of the reaction, and Y is going to be temperature," Susie continued. Amanda nodded and followed along, copying what Susie was doing — organizing the recorded numbers they had collected in class that day.

When the nachos were ready they girls put their schoolwork aside and ate. Amanda was surprised and thrilled when Barb took a plate for herself and went to watch TV. It gave her and Susie time to chat and eat without a parent's scrutiny. Susie filled Amanda in on some of the mean girls. She had been to school with Jen Beach since kindergarten, and they used to be friends until the third grade. That was all Susie said, but Amanda understood what it was like to be picked on. She told Susie a little bit about Stacey Peterson.

"But I had Ty!" Amanda blurted out suddenly, not wanting to make Susie think she had no friends.

"Ty?"

"Ya. Tyler. He was my best friend. We did everything together. He let me sleepov-" Amanda had to stop when a lump rose from her heart into her throat. It made her stomach clench with guilt to recall all the good Tyler had done for her. He had given her the only normal childhood experiences that she remembered.

She slept over at his house when her mother was drunk and too rough to go home to. Tyler would stand by her side on the playground when the mean girls threw rock from the sidelines. He never left her side. When she was sent to live with Donna, he would come and crawl into her window and bring her food or comic books. He convinced his mother to make him two sandwiches for lunch every day because Donna never packed her one. He even did Amanda's homework for her, knowing she would not have the time or the strength to do it herself after the tragic death of her mother.

Amanda had suppressed her feelings about abandoning Kipta without saying goodbye to Tyler, but now they were resurfacing and hitting her hard as she was making a new friend. She didn't mean to replace him. Her mouth tasted bitter with betrayal. "I — uh…he was a good friend," she mumbled. "I miss him, but we are not allowed to talk and I don't even have his e-mail."

"You are not allowed to talk to him?" Susie asked, much to Amanda's horror. She had said too much already.

"No," she replied simply, going back to her homework.

And Susie seemed to know not to ask for more details.

_Maybe she can call him from my house sometime if I can get his number,'_ Susie thought innocently. She wanted to help Amanda if she could, and that is the sort of thing that a friend would offer. She didn't know then that it would lead to many interesting discoveries about her new friend.

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A few hours later, Barb Bloom dropped Amanda off at the lakeside house. Amanda told her she could leave her at the top of the drive, but Barb insisted on driving her right to the house so she could see she got inside safely. It was a nice gesture, but Amanda could tell Barb was also curious to see the three-story house. It was quite remarkable.

"Uh…thank you for having me…and for dinner. It was very good," Amanda said as Susie got out of and slid the passenger seat up so Amanda could hop out from the back seat of the rusty Volkswagen.

"Oh, of course, Amanda. Come over anytime you'd like. We enjoyed having another girl in the house, didn't we Suze?"

"Thanks for coming over, Amanda," Susie told Amanda softly, but with complete sincerity. She was just hoping that nothing Amanda saw, or something her or her mother said, would make Amanda shy away.

"I think I might get a decent grade on this assignment. That will be a first!" Amanda said to lighten the strain on her new friend's face. Susie was pleased and waved back to Amanda as she got back into her mother's car. They waited until Amanda opened the front door to leave, and Amanda thought it was best to wave one last time in case Susie was still looking. Then she went in and closed the door.

Amanda was tired from the draining day. It took a lot of effort to be on your best behavior. New people were a lot more work to appease than familiar family members. And the heavy workout at swim practice had worn her out as well — not to mention the upset of reliving her grief over losing Tyler.

Amanda had nearly made it to her room without interference when Alice popped her head into the hallway. "Did you have fun with your _new_ friend?" she asked coldly.

She didn't like being blind when it came to things surrounding Amanda. Children's futures were always changing due to their lack of decision making, but even if this was not the case, there was something dangerous about this science nerd. Alice wasn't sure, but she had a feeling.

Amanda halted and stared dumbfounded at her cousin for a moment. She couldn't find words, and Alice didn't back down so she ducked into her room and shut the door as gently as she was able. The slam was not as violent as some other occasions, but to every vampire in the house it was a significant volume.

"What in hell's name was that about?" Rosalie spat as she and Emmet exited their bedroom.

Elizabeth came up the stairs and raised her brow at them both. Jasper emerged into the hall as well. Alice shrugged — not having to repeat her question since it was likely they all heard her ask — and smoothed out her blazer apathetically.

Amanda's muffled sobs could be heard slightly through the well-insulated door. She thought the pillow would hide the sounds.

Elizabeth gave Jasper a pleading glance and he complied with a short answer. "She's upset."

"No shit, Oh Great One," Rosalie snapped. "Any more helpful insights, or should we ask Alice what the future holds?"

"Don't you talk to him like that!" Alice snarled back.

"Oh boohoo. Jasper is a big boy, Alice. He can take it. What is your deal?" Rosalie folded her arms across her chest and glared at her little sister for an explanation. "You are usually all hearts and rainbows over Amanda."

"I don't know. I just asked her how her play date went and she lost it! Don't blame me!" Alice defended.

"You were too harsh with her, and you know it!"

"You're one to talk."

"Oh, shut it, Alice. I think you should go apologize to her," Rosalie instructed impatiently.

"I will not! I didn't do anything wrong!"

"You made her cry!"

"She is more sad than angry — guilty — and I don't think this is all about Alice," Jasper tried to shed light on the situation.

"Maybe she has PMS again or something," Emmet shared his take, at which Rosalie rolled her eyes at the comment's ridiculous notion.

"She's just being selfish again, that's all," Alice complained.

"Oh, be quiet, Alice. Act your age for once. You're over a century old for Christ's sake!" Rosalie barked at her sister. Oh, if Carlisle had been around to hear that, he would have been appalled.

Alice leaned forward with a fierce growl erupting from her tiny chest. Jasper touched her shoulder to settle her down, but Rosalie growled back, only making Alice more perturbed.

"I feel some hair pulling coming on…" Emmet teased in a high voice. His joke was not well received.

"Enough!" shouted Elizabeth. Her voice made everyone jump. None of them were used to her raising her voice. Since her transformation she had played it very low profile. "Now…your parents are out of the house and that puts me in charge. I want everyone who is not involved to go to his or her rooms and stay there. Alice, you are clearly upset about something yourself, so you will stay and have a chat with me. Understood?" She made the point to meet everyone's eyes to let them know she meant business.

"Uh, yes, Ma'am," Jasper replied serenely, trying to leave the atmosphere as peaceful as he could muster. He gave Alice a reassuring nod.

Rosalie huffed away and tugged Emmet along with her. "Woot, Liz!" Emmet bellowed as he hurried to Rosalie's bedroom. "Way to bring the hammer down on us!" Rosalie pulled him inside hastily and shut the door before Elizabeth could respond.

Once the others had gone, Elizabeth approached Alice slowly and reached out to her. Alice sighed and conceded. "I'm sorry, Liz. I shouldn't have said that to Amanda. I don't know why I did it. I didn't know it would make her cry. I am just so worried about her, I overreacted."

"I don't think I am the one who you should be telling this to. If you have something to say to Amanda you should be forthright with her so she knows where you stand. Most likely it is a misunderstanding that has you two at odds."

"Ya, I guess so," Alice agreed, feeling foolish to be chastised by Elizabeth. Her parents would be so ashamed, the felt. She frowned deeply at her own behavior. She was one to punish her own self when she did wrong.

"I very much doubt Amanda is crying solely because of your statement a few moments ago," Elizabeth offered, seeing that Alice was now truly sorry. "She is troubled over something else and it would be really nice if her _best friend_ could help her sort it out. Would you do that for me, please? Go and talk to her?"

"I — Uh, ya. I will." Alice nodded and her lips twitched into a sheepish smile. "Thanks, Liz."

She took a few steps closer to Amanda's bedroom and listened. The sobs were quieter now. When she looked behind her, Elizabeth had disappeared. She took a steadying breath and knocked three times on the thick, wood door.

"I'm busy!" Amanda said bravely, hoping her breakdown was not known. She should have known better than to think she could keep anything secret in the Cullen house.

"It's me, Mandi," Alice answered softly. "I'm sorry I hurt your feelings. Please let me come in."

The paused was almost unbearable for Alice.

"Come in," Amanda relented.

Alice was swift and shut the door behind her, then turned to Amanda. The tears were wiped away, but Alice's keen sight could clearly discern the puffiness of her eyes.

"I didn't mean to make you cry. I don't know what got into me."

"It's not you," Amanda whimpered in spite of her efforts to be strong.

"I think I am a bit...jealous. I'm sorry," Alice admitted.

Amanda was taken by surprise by Alice's admission.

Alice continued, "I felt so alone tonight when you didn't come home. I worry about you just as much as Mom and Dad do, you know? Usually we do everything together, and now with Susie you are starting to leave me-"

"I was only gone for a few hours more than a usual evening. It wasn't even my choice," Amanda explained.

"Perhaps I am being ridiculous. I just love you so much I want you to stay near so I know you are safe. I think seeing you make friends with someone your age made me act a little possessive," Alice admitted.

"You're still my best friend, Alice. Even if I make other friends, I mean. I know you don't like hanging out with other kids since you can't be yourself around them, but if you want to join me when I am with others…that would work, too. I don't want you to stay away just because I have other friends."

"Good, 'cause I want to be with you every second I can. Well…" Alice suddenly stopped to contemplate her words.

"Ya, ya… Except for when you're with Jasper. That's different. I get it," Amanda smiled.

Alice beamed and suddenly she was squeezing Amanda into her for a hug. But she had not completed her task yet. She had not solved what was making her young cousin so sad that she would breakdown so easily. Alice held Amanda out to get a good look at her.

"So…what is the matter, Mandi…really?"

"I miss Ty, sometimes, Aly." Amanda's head stayed down, but her eyes lifted to find Alice's. "I still feel bad about leaving without saying goodbye."

Alice hugged Amanda. "We had to keep you safe..."

/

/

/

"I know…"

Meanwhile, in her room back at the trailer park, Susie was doing research. It didn't take the smart girl long to find newspaper articles on Cole Roth, Amanda's supposed father. She read in horror about the terrible plane crash that took his life, feeling horrible for being so snoopy into her friend's past.

Susie's intentions were pure. She was only trying to see if she could find a phone number or something for Tyler so she could call him for Amanda and get his e-mail. She wanted to surprise Amanda by reuniting her with Tyler.

Susie had no idea how dangerous this quest would be…

Until her search lead her to Elizabeth Roth's obituary.

'_That's odd,'_ she decided.

Susie had never met Amanda's mother, but she had heard the name several times. It was her, that was for sure. It clearly mentioned her husband's previous passing and how there was no memorial because her body had mysteriously gone missing from the hospital in Prince George. There were other articles as well…and Susie couldn't help but read on.

She was just reading another article about a woman from Kipta who was searching for her kid when her mother stepped up behind her and read the screen over her shoulder.

"I went to elementary school her! Donna. Donna Combs. She moved to the interior for high school, but her brother is married to my hairdresser. I spoke with him a few weeks ago when I ran into him at the supermarket. Apparently his sister is searching for some child who got taken away from her a few years ago… Knowing Donna, it is for money or some other bullshit reason. The child is better off without her, if you ask me."

Susie was a bright girl. She understood immediately that the child in question was Amanda. Thank goodness Barb Bloom was not the best at reading her own daughter's body language. She kissed the crown of Susie's head and told her it was time for bed without suspecting a thing.

And Susie went to bed.

To Be Continued…

* * *

_Hmmm...so **what do you think? Kinda uh oh, eh?** :S _

_Thank you to Turbotalker for her suggestion. She must be a mind reader to have seen this one coming, but I did sway things a bit in her suggestion because she had some great ideas. :D _

**_Thanks for reading! Feedback is welcome. :)  
_**

_Coming up- News of Donna shocks the Cullen family and Amanda panics and goes on the run! _


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